Jerry talks to someone paying an ex's bills despite being ignored, calling it a learned reflex like a vending machine dispensing money when guilt hits. He suggests only paying in 2026 if the ex asks directly and respectfully, and to notice the physical sensation when the urge to pay kicks in.
Chapters
Someone told me, Jerry, I'm still paying my ex's bills and she wants nothing to do with me. He said, she ignores my messages, trashes me to the kids, but if the bill's due, I pay it. I hate it, but I feel like a monster if I stop. If you've ever felt that way, you're not weak. You're like a vending machine that never learned how to say out of order. The second that guilt or fear shows up, they'll suffer without you. That's what you think. The kids will pay. Your 5-second reflex slams the dispense button. Your body learns that funding everyone else is how you buy safety and love. Try this: imagine one Bill in 2026 only gets paid if they ask you directly and respectfully. Notice what happens in your chest. If you want help calming that reaction for 7 minutes, drop "Bill" in the comments, and I'll invite you to the Saturday Reset.