In a 2017 ABC Radio WA segment, host Barry interviews marriage celebrant Joanne Armstrong about a recommitment ceremony she will perform for a long‑term couple, Robin (formerly Rob) and Carol. The couple, married for 28 years, are reaffirming their vows after Robin’s gender transition. Armstrong explains that a recommitment ceremony is a way to celebrate a renewed commitment when the original marriage cannot be legally altered under the current Marriage Amendment Act (which, at the time, prohibited same‑sex marriage). She describes the couple’s journey: Robin’s transition, the legal hurdles they faced (e.g., the Births, Deaths and Marriages registry requiring divorce for a birth‑certificate gender change), and the supportive response from their adult children. Armstrong highlights her own commitment to marriage equality, noting that she welcomes couples of any gender or sexuality. The interview touches on the emotional aspects for the couple, the symbolic significance of Robin wearing a dress for the first time, and the broader message that people should be treated with equal respect regardless of gender or sexual orientation.
Chapters
7 past 3 on ABC Radio WA. Look, my next guest is a marriage celebrant based in Western Australia. Now, over the coming years, she's going to be remarrying, and I put that in inverted commas, a couple who've been together for 26 years. They have children in their 20s and they're still in love. The only difference is that one of them has transitioned into a female, and the, uh, the husband Rob is now Robin. Who is recommitting to his wife Carol. Joanne Armstrong, a marriage celebrant who's performing a recommitment ceremony, is with us. Joanne, good afternoon.
Good afternoon. Thank you so much for this opportunity, Barry.
Tell me, what is a recommitment ceremony?
Essentially, it is a way to get around the current law, and it is no different to, to me, As any other wedding. I treat it as the same. The only difference is that you obviously can't marry a couple twice. This couple are already married, and you also cannot marry same-sex couples under the current legislation of the Marriage Amendment Act, which is based on the Marriage Act 1961.
Have you performed recommitment ceremonies for people who have been married and then just decided to recommit? There hasn't been a change of gender involved?
Absolutely. It's not uncommon for people to want to reseal the deal or give what's called a vow affirmation as well. The most recent couple were in their 70s. One is critically ill with cancer, and they just thought any excuse for a party. Obviously, having gone through so many life changes, it seemed fitting for them to actually celebrate it all over again.
Tell us a bit, if you could, about this couple that we're talking about today. So We have the husband, Rob, who's now Robin, who's recommitting to his wife Carol as a female. Tell us about the couple and their family.
Such a gorgeous couple who have come through to me via recommendation from a venue. Essentially, they are no different to any other married couple that love one another. The only difference is that despite the 28 years of marriage as a heterosexual couple, through lots of self-learning and self-reflection and a lot of dialogue within the family, The husband has actually come to terms with the fact that he's in the wrong body, and he has always felt that way. So it has been a really difficult, arduous journey, but one where he's been honest with his wife. And despite the difficulties that they've had to go through, they both really love each other. They've been very lucky to help transition and to have his sex recognized on his passport, on his driver's license, through Medicare. However, when they went to the births, deaths, and marriages registry They were told that the only way that they could have his sex recognised on the birth certificate was if they were divorced. Now, you can imagine how they obviously feel with all of this. And not only is it discriminatory, but I think that they're entitled to also take stock of all the massive changes that they've endured, of the fact that they're a loving family. They're not going to get divorced. That's the last resort. They've got the full support of those that love them around them, including their teenager— their kids in their 20s. Tell us about that.
If you could, Joanne, what has been the reaction, excuse me, from the children?
I think that obviously it's been a huge set of facts for them to grapple with. It's been confusing and confronting, but I think, you know, given that they are a close-knit family and always have been, they love each other. It's quite a simple thing, Barry, and this is where I think regardless of whether people are gay, lesbian, bisexual, trans, or intersex, they are human just like any other, and For them, it's quite simple. They want to continue spending the rest of their lives together, but they don't want to have to hide from who they actually are.
My guest this afternoon, Joanne Armstrong, who's a marriage celebrant in the southwest of the state. We're talking about her recommitment ceremony that she is going to be providing for a couple. This couple is a little bit different because the husband, Rob, is now Robin. Who is recommitting to his wife Carol. So they're still in love, they still want it to be known that they are committed to each other. Did this couple have— I don't want to cast aspersions on your fine abilities, but did this couple have trouble finding a celebrant?
I'm not quite sure how long they looked for, but I've, you know, since moving to Margaret River, I have made a big deal about, you know, marriage equality. I've spoken with, I like highlighting that anything that is against the grind, anything avant-garde, I love helping people of any gender or any sexuality. And I was very lucky to have parenting that gave me guidance to accept people regardless of, you know, what their preferences. And I think that we're well behind the times, Barry, and just hope that this postal plebiscite will see change.
You mentioned the children who, you know, they Obviously found it a bit confronting initially, but are fully supportive. Are they attending the recommitment ceremony?
Yes, they are, and it will only be close-knit family, but they've got their full support. This is their dad slash mum, so I don't know how the family will be calling one another, but I do know that Robyn is really looking forward to also just wearing a dress. This is an opportunity she didn't have originally on her wedding day, so we'll have 2 brides in 2 dresses, Which I think is pretty cool.
How's Robyn traveling with it all? And also Carol, you know, this change in their lives?
I think frustrated as well as excited. You know, they've had to make some personal decisions to plow forward and to do what feels right for them. I did ask Carol just before the interview if she had one message to give. Essentially, I summarized it, summarized what she said, and For them, the debate's gone haywire and it's about facts. It's not about religion, it's not about politics, it's not about anyone else. It's about the right for each human to be treated equally and to have a choice. And it's the right to have a choice, nothing more, nothing less, because at the end of the day, as they see it, they are just people. And their message to the public is treat people with the same respect that you want to be treated yourself.
We'll leave you there, Joanne. Thank you, appreciate you coming on and telling us your story. Joanne Armstrong. He's a marriage celebrant in the southwest of the state.
