“My Dog Is Just Protecting Me” Why That’s Almost Never True

Hello, dog peeps. Jack here. Just a quick one before we get into this episode. You may or may not be aware that when I'm not talking dog stuff with Max, I in fact interview people who are incarcerated in prisons across the United States on a show called One Minute Remaining: Stories from the Inmates. And that show has been nominated for an award in America. And I would love your support if you've got 60 seconds to click the link in the show notes of this episode and just vote for my show. That would be amazing if you could. Thank you very much indeed. Oh, and don't forget to verify your email address. Otherwise, the vote does not count. Thank you.

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It's the Dog People Podcast with your host Jack Lawrence. Secretly I decided to start this podcast for some free dog training advice. You know, Malinois seem to be like the dog at the moment. Like, I think people see them on Instagram doing these incredible things.

Yeah.

Go, oh my God, that's awesome. And then they get one like, oh my God, what the fuck have I done? And Max O'Neill.

You would not believe how many people I meet and I go, what made you want to get, say, an Aussie Shepherd? They go, I don't know. I'd go, had you met one before? They go, no. If you want to ask me how often I walk my own dog a week, it's only twice a week.

It's the Dog People Podcast, the podcast hopefully giving you a no-nonsense approach to dog training so you never have to shout, it's okay, it's friendly. My name is Jack Lawrence, not a dog trainer, but of course Max O'Neill, Down Under Dog Trainer. Max, we want to talk about something that's completely just left my brain. Oh yeah, yeah, no, no, no, don't, don't tell me. I know what we're talking about. We want to myth bust, and the myth we want to bust is, and I'm going to be honest here, a myth that I used to think of a dog that I had, and that's that your dog actually isn't trying to protect you or isn't overprotective of you. In fact, you know, a thing that you would get no doubt so many times from people approaching you saying, I've got an issue with a reactive dog and it's reactive because he's just so protective of me. Yeah.

I mean, like why we did this episode, we would Just wrapping up, and then I got a text message through that exact thing. Hey, I've got a one-year-old Cavoodle. He's super protective of me, and we just went, oh, there we go. That's that can be our one more episode today. So here we are having a chat about it. It is no exaggeration. Literally an everyday thing. People telling me their dog is protective of me, and it's honestly whether they're a you know a big scary German Shepherd or a Maltese. It's it's honestly pretty much just as Just as incorrect and just as laughable at times. So let's, uh, let's break it down and, and go for it. Because a lot of people tend to think their dog is protective, and they have kind of got to that conclusion because they tend to see themselves as a common denominator. They go, oh, if someone else walks my dog, he doesn't do that. Or when he's off lead and at doggy daycare, he doesn't do that. But as soon as I've got him, or people come into my house or come near me or sit next to me on the couch, he's really protective of me.

Hmm.

So I can get how people can draw to that conclusion. Exclusion, but it's honestly not that. It's what we call a resource guarding issue, is your dog's not remotely concerned for your safety. They don't think you're under threat. They're not worried about that. What they are threatened by is they go, hey, this is like my favourite resource and I do not want to share it. It's this classic resource guarding. Your dog is treating you and seeing you no differently as their food bowl or their toy.

You're simply just a thing that fulfils a need for them, but they don't respect you Can it also be, and I think this was what the situation that I had years ago. Now I've spoken about in a previous episode, my experience with a reactive dog with other dogs and stuff like that. And I generally, cause you know, he used to react when we had the kids more so, it felt, it felt more so. I'm not saying it was more so. I think in the moment it probably felt more so. But he used to react and we used to think he was being, I used to, I used to think he was being, I think he's trying to protect the kids, but what I now looking back at it, But looking back at it, knowing what I know now and, you know, all the sort of learning I've done of this over the last sort of year or so, what I think it may have been was the fact that he was just trying to protect himself because he didn't see me as being able to do that for him. Because it would happen, it would trigger him when dogs would run at us.

Yeah.

If an overzealous dog came charging towards us. He would instantly fire up. And I, and I see that now as potentially he thought, well, I've got to do this because this dude's not going to do it. Yeah.

This guy's not going to do shit. Yeah.

Yeah. Yeah.

So it can, it can be that as well. It's like, it's, it's 99% of the time your dog not protecting you. And we know that because like, I, you know, deal with, you know, protective dogs now. And let's, let's list off a few protective breeds like Malinois, German Shepherds, Rottweilers, right? They're like your big 3, or Dobermans. Let's put them in. And let's fuck it, let's go Dutch Shepherds just because otherwise they'll go, what about this breed? So just so we just don't get any of that shit, there's your top 5.

What about pugs?

Yeah, so there's like your big 5 protection breeds, right? I can tell you is even with protection-based breeds like those 5 who come from protection-based lines, because again you see a lot of just like couch potato German Shepherds, couch potato Rottweilers, show line this, whatever that is even from dogs that come from working lines, protection lines, both parents are working in that field. Even so, you will get a litter where half of them at least don't make the cut.

Yeah.

You know, because you'll see, you know, and you hear and speak to people, it's like, oh, like we just bred a litter of pups for German Shepherd, you know, German Shepherd pups for the police. They're all ideally going to go into this work job role. And then 12 to 18 months later, I know 3 or 4 of them jumped out because they just had zero interest in protecting the handler or doing this or whatever. Like if someone came to us from behind, that dog would just be gone. So even with dogs who are like purpose bred for this, finding a dog who truly cares about your safety so much so that they're willing to put their own safety on the line, like, is— it's such a counterproductive need to their own existence that like, and that, you know, it's, it, it, it's just rare to even get it in those dogs. So I promise you, like, your tiny little Dachshund, Cavoodle, Maltese, whatever, your Labrador, even your German Shepherd, like, it's the likelihood that it's protecting you is so, so, so low. It's either just reactive because, like Jack said, they don't trust you as a handler. They think of you as weak and incapable, or they're resource guarding because they have zero.

That felt personal. It felt really personal.

Or they're resource guarding you because they have zero respect for you, and it's just getting worse. But it's it's just the truth. It's just whenever I see these people like that, their dogs resource guard. They go, "Oh, but I don't want to stop loving me." I'm like, "Hey, like." No one has more love than between like Nelson and I, but importantly, he really doesn't see me as a resource he can control. I'm very in control of our relationship.

Yeah.

My resource that I can provide him, my attention, my affection, and things we do, our activities we do together, I control when those things start and when those things stop. Where for a lot of dogs, they go, oi, owner, pat me. Oi, owner, bark, take me on a walk. Oi, owner, look at me. Like, and the dog just sees you as a, as a thing to meet their needs. And that's what they will resource guard.

Therapy's biggest impact doesn't show up in some dramatic breakthrough. It shows up in the smallest moments. You bite your tongue instead of escalating. You put your phone down instead of firing off that text. You say what you actually mean instead of what would hurt someone else the most. Nobody applauds those moments, but they quietly change your life. That's what growing feels like, and that's exactly what Grow Therapy is here for. Grow is therapy that works, covered by insurance. Sessions average $21 with insurance, and some pay as little as $0 depending on their plan. There are no subscriptions, no long-term commitments. You just pay per session. Grow connects you with thousands of high-quality licensed therapists across the US, offering both virtual and in-person sessions nights and weekends. You can search by what matters, like insurance, specialty, identity, or availability, and you can book a therapy session in minutes and begin in as little as 2 days, not the national 48-day average. See if you could pay as little as $0 for therapy in seconds at growtherapy.com/startnow. That's growtherapy.com/startnow. growtherapy.com/startnow. Availability and coverage vary by state and insurance plan.

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I mean, even now, I mean, Kira and I have an incredibly good, what I would call strong relationship. She sees everything good comes from me. And all that sort of stuff. But even now, I know for a fact that if someone came running at us, you know, she would be off like a shot. It was funny, a trainer posted on their Instagram the other day, like, you know, I can show, I can prove to you that your dog's not going to protect you. And I wrote back saying, don't worry, I have no preconceived conceptions that my dog would do anything but run the other way.

Yeah. And it is that sometimes you have to disprove it to owners. Like, I'll get to someone's house, like, no, I know he is. And it's this I get it's this nice narrative we like to have.

Yeah, of course people people like that.

Yeah, I get it's easy to buy into it, but like all right, let's do this. Let's stick let's tie your dog to that tree. We'll walk five meters away so we won't be anywhere near your dog, and I'm going to start in a moment just pretend to yell at you and wave my hands. Ready? One two three.

Ra ra ra ra ra!

And the dog will hit the other end of leash and get even further away from us and go thank fuck I'm not a part of that. Yeah, still yet to this day we'll test it with. So many dogs, not had one run towards me and go, get away from my mum. They're like, oh, I'm out of here. For sure, they'll bark if I come over and do that because like, hey, get away from my, my resource. But if they can get themselves out of harm's way, like they'll, they'll do it. They're not, they're not concerned for your safety.

Yeah. Now we had a couple come the other day because they were asking if we'd look after one of their dogs, which was a French bulldog. And the lady said to me instantly, she's like, he's, he's a bit, he's dog reactive. And I said, oh, do you realize? Has anything happened in the past? She goes, no, but I think he's just protecting me from the other dogs. And I went, okay, so is he aggressive towards the dog? She's like, oh, and Kiri was sitting right there and he was doing nothing. And I'm like, he's not reacting right now though. So she's like, yeah, no, it's, I don't know. It just, it happens.

Just when I pat all the dogs.

Yeah. Yeah. It was just, and I was just, and I obviously I'm not sitting here like high and mighty and I sort of went, oh, okay, fair enough. I said, well, I doubt it probably is protecting you, but you know, who knows? You're probably better off to get an expert to have a look at that. But it might be, you know, more frustration because she said that he goes to doggy daycare and he's Loves being around dogs, has a great time. And I said, well, I said, maybe it's not aggression. Maybe it's just frustration because he wants to play with those dogs because he knows that playing with dogs is fun.

Yeah.

So yeah. So there's, there can be a whole list of reasons why your dog is reacting to people or other dogs or things. And very low down on the list, if even on the list whatsoever at all, in any type of scenario whatsoever, it's probably not the fact that your dog is trying to protect you.

Exactly. And it's just important to be accurate about these things because if you're trying to work on an issue while you've got this thing in your head that you're just—

well, that is completely false.

Like, you, you will stonewall. So the moment you accept reality, go, okay, it's not this, it's actually this, and oh, I'm a bit bummed that I thought my, you know, I thought my miniature dachshund was going to protect me, but it's not. It's like once you get over that and move past it and just accept what you really do have, like, it really helps you to move through. And that's one of the biggest roadblocks we get with clients is sometimes 2 sessions in, I'm like Hey, like your dog really isn't protecting you. Like we need it. We need to get over this because if you keep thinking that, we'll keep handling it the wrong way. And then you just, you're just not going to get there.

You know, one thing while we're on this subject, because obviously I see a lot of dog videos online because that's how I spend most of my time. But one thing I see a lot, which I really don't like, but you see it a lot is, you know, people post these videos of them sort of going to yell at their children or pretending to go and smack their children or something like that. And the dog arcing up. And then going, this dog will protect my children to the end of the earth. And, you know, people even say, oh, that dog will protect your child, you know, forever and a day. Obviously without seeing it, you can't tell, but you know, what do you think? Is there something you think is happening in that scenario? Like, is it the dog just reacting because of the high level of sort of like, because they're pretending to be aggressive?

Yeah, I do. I do think there's something to that. Like, I do think our dogs treat, you know, young, like kids, a bit differently to adults. And that is like somewhat instinctual in them as well to like protect Smaller things. Yeah, smaller, younger people of the group. I do think when sometimes when there's kids, I can see a little bit more of that just because I'm like, oh, that stage kids aren't necessarily that much of a resource and they don't provide the dog that much other than the odd, you know, pat and cuddle and whatnot. But I also think the most like our dogs, a lot of dogs just don't like conflict and they'll react to it in the same way. Like if, you know, the first thing our dog, like put it this way, right? If your dog got in a fight at the park, first thing we do is, hey, hey, hey.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yelling and screaming.

But like Would we actually stick our hand in the middle? And like a lot of people kind of freeze and then don't know what to do. And that's quite what the dogs are. They get over it, then you could keep going with that. And most dogs, you see, they go, oh, I'm not going to go any further. You called my bluff. Like, so again, like maybe sure, like sometimes, but I think again, 9 times out of 10, they're just freaking out at the conflict of the whole situation and kind of, yeah, just freaked out by it really.

Fair enough. All right. Well, if you think your dog is protecting you, this episode is to probably in a nice roundabout way, just tell you that you're probably Probably wrong. And maybe to try and look at other, other reasons as to why your dog is potentially reacting to things that—

Maybe send this to a friend who you think needs to hear this.

Yes, absolutely. I'll send this to that lady that came around the other day, but take this bit out. All right. Any questions, as always, make sure you jump on the Facebook page, search the Dog People Podcast, and we'll get them answered for you. The Dog People Podcast is a Mashed Pumpkin production hosted by Jack Lawrence and Max O'Neill. Edited, produced, and audio production by Jack Lawrence.

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