The Five Pillars of a Well-Balanced Dog

Hello, dog peeps. Jack here. Just a quick one before we get into this episode. You may or may not be aware that when I'm not talking dog stuff with Max, I in fact interview people who are incarcerated in prisons across the United States on a show called One Minute Remaining: Stories from the Inmates. And that show has been nominated for an award in America. And I would love your support if you've got 60 seconds to click the link in the show notes of this episode and just vote for my show. That would be amazing if you could. Thank you very much indeed. Oh, and don't forget to verify your email address. Otherwise, the vote does not count. Thank you.

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It's the Dog People Podcast with your host, Jack Lawrence. Secretly, I decided to start this podcast for some free dog training advice. You know, Malinois seem to be like the dog at the moment. Like, I think people see them on Instagram doing these incredible things. Yeah.

Go, oh my God, that's awesome.

And then I get one like, oh my God, what the fuck have I done? And Max O'Neill.

You would not believe how many people I meet and I go, what made you want to get, say, an Aussie Shepherd? They go, I don't know. I go, had you met one before? They go, no. If you want to ask me how often I walk my own dog a week, it's only twice a week.

It's the Dog People Podcast, a podcast hopefully giving you a no-nonsense approach to dog training so you never have to shout, it's okay, he's friendly. My name is Jack Lawrence. With me, Max O'Neill, a highly professional and learned dog trainer on the Gold Coast. In fact, the highest rated dog trainer on the Gold Coast. Max, what we want to talk about in this episode is the first 5 things. If you're bringing home a dog for the first time, the first 5 things that you as a dog trainer would do and have done with your dog Nelson. Obviously, you know, you've had him now for over a year.

Yep.

But the first 5 things that you did as a dog trainer to have a well-mannered Well-adjusted dog.

Absolutely. So, if I was bringing a dog home tomorrow, a puppy, these are the 5 things I'd focus on. In today's episode, we're going to give you a little overview of these 5 things. But across the coming episodes, we're going to give you an in-depth look at each one of these topics.

Deep diving.

So, it's deep, very deep diving. So, the 5 things I'd focus on are socialisation, adequate sleep, outlets for your dog, structure for your dog, and engagement. Let's start with number 1, socialisation.

This is a big one because I don't think many people understand the term socialisation, because when we say it, we think, oh, go out and have a party with as many friends as possible. We're going to socialise. But that is not the case when it comes to dogs. Well, it's a very small part of what socialisation is with dogs. Yeah.

Absolutely. And I think that's— you're exactly right. And the same association we have with socialisation for people, most people have with dogs too. Most people think socialisation is dog-to-dog interactions, but socialisation is exposing your dog to every aspect of your life and their life. So, socialisation is getting your dog used to different contexts, different environments, all sorts of people, All sorts of things happening, all sorts of noises, sounds, smells, textures. And then dogs are just one small part of it. So when you get a dog, your dog is at 8 weeks is when you should be getting your puppy, no earlier than that. Your dog is right in the middle of what we call a critical period of development. From when your dog first becomes aware at about 3 weeks, when their nose, eyes, and ears open, up until about 16 weeks, that's when your dog is really making up their mind on how they feel about that world. So, if you don't give them enough exposure to things during that, they might forever feel like a fish out of water. If you give them too much experience with those things, you can overexpose them in a way where they get really addicted to that thing and really rely on being around it a lot. Or you can overexpose it where you completely turn them off it. So, when you first get your puppy home, it's really important to focus on socialisation with the goal of neutrality. That's the word you want to have in mind is you want to make your dog neutral towards these things.

Yeah.

We want them to enjoy the beach. We don't want them to be hysterical when they see the beach. I want my dog to like dogs. I don't want my dog to fixate on other dogs is essentially what you're looking for.

Like my dog does. Fixates on Nelson all the time. Any dog, she just absolutely fixates on dogs. She does love dogs. That's because she got absolutely flooded by dogs as a puppy. So, this is where it can go wrong, where they can have overexposure. She definitely had overexposure because we were fostering dogs and mainly puppies. So, she was just flooded with puppies all the time. And obviously puppies are fun and they want to play. And so, she's Absolutely. Now she sees a dog, it's like, oh, and trying to work away from that and say, hey, you can see a dog, that's exciting, but come with me, has been a really hard process. We're sort of getting there now. But yeah, that's why this critical phase in your dog's life is so important.

Exactly. They always say you can't teach old dogs new tricks. And for the most part, that's a myth. But in terms of how you end your socialisation, once that window closes around that 16-week mark, it can be hard to change your dog's mind after that. So We'll go more into depth with that topic when we do a whole episode on it. And we're also going to put a good resource out for you guys. So, for anyone getting a puppy, we're going to put out a socialisation checklist. These are things that I focus on, get my clients to focus on, and you will be able to focus on those too. But let's move to our second topic, which is sleep.

Oh, big one.

Big one.

Just like having babies, which you'll experience very soon, Mr. Max O'Neill.

Very excited for that.

Much like babies, puppies also need an incredible amount of sleep. And that's another thing that people don't realise. The amount of sleep that they think they need and what they really need is probably vastly different.

Very different things. So, when I ask the average person in a, you know, in a puppy consult, how much sleep do you think your puppy needs and how much do you think they're getting? Most answers, people say, oh, they probably need their 8 hours just like us. And I probably think they're getting a little bit more than that, probably around 12 hours. And the answer to that is when you get a puppy home at, you know, at that 8-week mark is it depends on the breed. But the general consensus is they need around 18 to 22 hours of sleep a day. Which is crazy to think about that they're really only supposed to be active for 2 hours a day. But we're forgetting when we get those dogs, they're infants. They should be up for brief periods and then go back to sleep. They need all that time to grow. And what's the good and bad about the way the general population is understanding dogs now is we understand dogs need exercise and enrichment and fulfilment, but sometimes we can overdo this. We can constantly stimulate our dog. constantly jack them up and get them really adrenalised, and then they really struggle to sleep. And we think the more we tire them out, the better they're going to sleep, but we never actually give them a chance. We're constantly providing them with stimulation, and then we get this overtired dog. And if anyone's ever been around a toddler who's missed nap time—

Oh, crying and screaming and being, you know, whereas puppies turn to being a bit more destructive, maybe barking, whining.

Yeah, exactly. Just, yeah, just as frustrated, they express it in different ways. But as Jack said, lots of vocalising, mouthing, destroying things, and then, you know, they can get overtired, they cannot want to sleep, and then it becomes more of an issue. So With your puppy, it's— if you're getting a puppy tomorrow, it's definitely great to give them outlets, which will be our next point, but also make sure you're leaving plenty of low stim time so they do have an environment they can fall asleep in because they 1,000% need it.

And obviously, there is ways in which you can help them with that, which again, we'll get more into depth with when we actually tackle this subject on its own. But, you know, things like crate training and that sort of stuff, that's when that comes into play. But again, another topic we'll talk about in another episode. But what's our next one out of the 5?

Cool.

Our next one is outlets. So, as we just mentioned then, your dog does need outlets. And from the get-go, you want to get really good at identifying what your dog needs. So, quite often when we're seeing our puppy being, quote unquote, naughty, what we're really seeing is what's called a fulfilment-seeking behaviour, is we're seeing our dog having this need, this little itch at the back of their mind they're trying to scratch. And they go, maybe if I bite this curtain, maybe if I bite your shoelaces, maybe if I chase the cat, maybe that will scratch that itch. So, it's paying attention to your puppy and getting to know them over the next few weeks and saying, okay, what is it that they're craving? What is it that they're doing that's so naughty? Because what I'm really seeing here is a fulfilment-seeking behaviour. So, if your dog is constantly nibbling on the chair leg, maybe they need something hard to appease their teething. If your dog's chasing the cat, maybe they need something to chase. If your dog is constantly wanting to tug at your shoelaces, maybe they want to tug, shake and hold things. So, it's about providing outlets, but not just your typical, I'm going to take them for a walk, throw the ball for 5 minutes and that's it. It's really Getting to know the individual you have in front of you and going, what can I do to spin their dial specifically?

And there's, I mean, obviously there's certain breeds that you can get which are very easy to understand what their outlets are, like herding breeds, for example. Like I was out the other day with Kira and this lady had a Kelpie and the Kelpie would not come back to her. It was just herding other dogs just constantly. And it was a very young dog. It was just herding and herding and herding and she couldn't get it to come back. And I just sort of said to her, I said, hey, your dog needs to herd. And I told her about the place I've been taking Kira and I said, look, go here. Give it that outlet, because then you'll find as soon as it's got something like that and you do it, then you'll get all that other stuff like the recall and all the rest of it because you're giving it an outlet. Obviously, other breeds are a bit harder when you get— if you get dogs from rescues and stuff like that, where there are bits of this and bits of that. And that's when you probably have to pay a little bit closer attention as to, like you say, watch them, see what they're doing.

Yeah.

See what they enjoy, whether it's fetch, whether it's whatever it might be. And I've seen that again with Kira. It's just finding something that fulfils her mentally helps with Everything else. Exactly. Yeah.

We always tell people that your dog's behaviour will leave clues. You know, the things that they get up to is if we let them, you know, leave them to their devices, they'll, they'll really show you what they're craving. And I can tell you from firsthand experience, I own a working line Rottweiler, and if we don't give him Rottweiler-like activities—

He's biting on your leg.

Yeah, exactly. Especially as a puppy, he'd start to get really antsy. He's like, hey, I'm hanging out for one. So once you get good at providing proper outlets for your dogs, which again, we're going to go into way more depth with.

Yeah, it's a big topic.

This is a big game changer.

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Therapy's biggest impact doesn't show up in some dramatic breakthrough. It shows up in the smallest moments. You bite your tongue instead of escalating. You put your phone down instead of firing off that text. You say what you actually mean instead of What would hurt someone else the most. Nobody applauds those moments, but they quietly change your life. That's what growing feels like, and that's exactly what Grow Therapy is here for. Grow is therapy that works, covered by insurance. Sessions average $21 with insurance, and some pay as little as $0 depending on their plan. There are no subscriptions, no long-term commitments. You just pay per session. Grow connects you with thousands of high-quality licensed therapists across the US, offering both virtual and in-person In sessions nights and weekends. You can search by what matters, like insurance, specialty, identity, or availability. And you can book a therapy session in minutes and begin in as little as 2 days, not the national 48-day average. See if you could pay as little as $0 for therapy in seconds at growtherapy.com/startnow. That's growtherapy.com/startnow. growtherapy.com/startnow. Availability and coverage vary by state and insurance plan.

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Hello, legends. Just a quick reminder before we jump back into the episode that we have got a Facebook group that is open to you right now. Just search the Dog People Podcast on Facebook. Join us for the discussion around dogs, everything to do with dogs and dog training. We want to be your source of help because we know this world of dog training can be a minefield. So join us right now. Let's get back into the episode.

So our next one, speaking of outlets, we want to talk about engagement as well. So engagement's a bit of a buzzword a lot of people throw around, but rightfully so. It's very important. But we'll break down a little bit more about what it is. So firstly, engagement is an attitude, not a behaviour. The distinction being is teaching your dog to focus and look at you on command. That's a behaviour. Engagement's a general attitude. Okay. Nelson doesn't have to be locking eyes with me 24/7, but when we go out somewhere, he's engaged with me. Okay. In the same way where if you're going for a walk with someone, you can tell whether they're engaged in the conversation or not. They don't have to be staring you in the eye. It's the same with your dog. Engagement's an attitude. You can tell when they're orbiting around you, circling around you, connected and dialed into you. In recent years, people have been referring to this as a Bluetooth connection as well.

Yep.

But engagement's that attitude and how you start to build it really is just becoming the source of all your dog's favourite things. But if we're getting even more specific, it's becoming the source of your dog's dopamine. Simple as that. Okay. Again, we'll explore this more in depth when we cover this episode. But if you're getting your puppy tomorrow or you've just gotten a puppy, really start to look at again, what are their favourite things? Are they obsessed with chasing? You be the one that throws a ball. Do they like to tug on things? Be at the other end of that tug. Are they into food? Ditch the food bowl. Okay. You be the source of the food. It's being the source of all those crazy things. And then when you go to the beach, your dog goes, you know what? There's a dog over there. That's pretty cool. But that's my, you know, walking, talking human food bowl that I can tug on and play rope with and also dispenses balls. Like, that thing is awesome. That's engagement. That's when you get that attitude.

Another thing that's, again, you know, going back to Kira, for so— for people who are just listening to the podcast, my dog is a cattle cross something who I fostered and then eventually rescued because no one else wanted the poor thing. So she stayed with me. But I'm glad she did because she unearthed this whole fun and excitement that I'm now experiencing. She gave you the bug.

She did.

Absolutely.

Because I had to. It was out of necessity because she is such a high-drive dog. But again, it's just like that first moment when you go out and you see that she's like so focused on me, like not other things. She'll have a look at a dog, but then she looks back to me. I'm like, and that is such a win, you know? And I took my mum out. She came to visit recently and we took Kira out to the park and we were sort of walking around. She goes, she doesn't stop looking at you. And it takes time as well. You know, that engagement thing with you, it does take time and it takes a lot of work.

Yeah.

And I think that's the other thing that not a lot of people really realize And what people don't realise is that dogs are a lot of work. They don't come pre-programmed. No. You know, and I'm not sitting here on my high horse saying, you know, you need to— it's like, I was the same. I have been through the process where I've had a reactive dog because of the things that I did wrong. And, you know, it's been such a serious learning curve for me. But engagement is, again, it's such a massive thing and a topic we'll really delve into in another episode.

Definitely looking forward to getting into that one. Our last one is structure. So again, another word that people toss around, but You know, when I ask people, you know, okay, so you're implementing structure. What really is that? Do you, you know, do you understand what you're doing? And again, because of the information out there, a lot of people actually don't. They get told to live a structured life with their dog. They get told to provide structure to their dog, but they don't really understand it. So we're going to dive a lot deeper into this. But structure in a nutshell is providing some rather— some level of just rhythm, repetition, and predictability and order to your dog's day. Okay. So think back to when you're at school, you could look at your school planner and go, okay, today at 8 o'clock, I'll get English, 9 o'clock, I got maths. 10 o'clock, I got lunch, etc., etc. You sort of know what you're doing throughout the day. There's some level of order and structure to it. It's not just I rock up at school and see what happens. Essentially, what you're trying to build is you don't want your puppy waking up every day thinking, I don't know what's going to happen. You want them to have a rough understanding of, I'm going to get up, go to the toilet, have breakfast, do some play, have some downtime, go in the crate, rinse and repeat essentially throughout the day. But that's another area where we're going to provide you with a really handy resource. When we drop that episode, that's going to— and we're going to break that down in the episode and give you— actually break down what structure is, how to apply it, how to use it. And if you really buy into that, it's going to make your puppy rearing and raising so much easier.

I say it so, so many times, but it's just so true. Raising a child and a dog is very similar because kids, you know, small kids, the same structure. My kids love structure. If something changes, you know, they're completely out of whack and they become a pain in the arse. And it's the same with dogs. You give them structure. I think you can, you can again with these things go too far with the structure.

Absolutely.

Because I found I've had that issue. But again, we'll get into that when we actually talk about it. But I found with, with Kira, she picks up on things very quickly. Things become behaviours for her very quickly.

Yeah, absolutely.

So, if I take that away, she gets like annoyed.

Yeah.

And we'll talk about preventative measures for that. We'll break down the difference between structure and routine. But if you've just got a puppy, really start to add some level of structure to your day so that your dog knows every day I'm getting some playtime. Some downtime, some crate time, some nap time. Just even just that, having some level of predictability, doesn't have to be a tight routine, is going to be good for your dog if you've just got one.

Alright. So, those 5 things just quickly, one after the other.

Socialisation, adequate sleep, correct outlets, structure for your dog, and building engagement.

Yeah. As Max said, we will be covering all of those in much more detail in their own separate podcast episodes, because if we did that right now, we'd go forever. But if you have any specific questions on any of those topics at all, make sure you head to the Dog People Pod Facebook group and jump in there, give us your question, and we will answer it in one of the upcoming episodes. The Dog People Podcast is a Mashed Pumpkin production hosted by Jack Lawrence and Max O'Neill, edited, produced, and audio production You're either all in on this model, or maybe you're building with another.

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