Dr Greg Bahnsen - Proverbs: Proverbs 13:20 (Wise Companions) (Part 50)

As a way of learning wisdom from God. And from time to time, we have found in the Book of Proverbs things which somewhat surprise us, things that deal with mundane affairs of life, which, according to the word of God, reflect our standing in God's sight, our view of holiness, our understanding of God, and how much we reverence Him. We're not accustomed to thinking of such things in religious terms, but the Book of Proverbs helps us to see how broad is the Christian conception of godliness, how broad is the Christian world and life view, so that every aspect of our lives is related to the Lord Himself. This morning we come to another one of those places where we are sometimes not inclined to think of it as a religious question. But the Book of Proverbs tells us it's really, really is. And that is how we choose our friends, the companions that we have. And I'd like you to turn in the Book of proverbs to chapter 13, verse 20, for our key text. And of course, we'll be looking at a number of other passages similar to it as we go through this subject this morning. Proverbs 13, verse 20. Hear now God's word. Walk with wise men, and thou shalt be wise, but the companion of fools shall smart for it. And thus far, the reading of God's word. I wonder how many of you remember the old Beatles song, I'll get by with a little help from my friends. Well, I'm not here to promote Beatles music this morning, but you know, that sentiment is true. Whether you happen to sing that song or whether that tune is one of your favorites or not, the sentiment is certainly human. I'll get by with a little help from my friends. There's a natural human desire for friends. A natural human desire for people with whom we can share our joys and our sorrows. For friends, we want people that we can feel close to. We want people with whom we can enjoy life's experiences. You know, it's one thing to have a good meal, but it's twice as good to have a good meal with a friend. It's one thing to enjoy a beautiful landscape or a beautiful sight, the Grand Canyon or Lake Tahoe or whatever it may be. But, you know, there's something about savoring that with a friend that makes it all that much better. Having someone to enjoy praise with, to enjoy joy, to enjoy life's experiences, but also to help us through life's tough spots. I think we all, hopefully we all know what it is to have someone to say just the right Thing when we were down. To be understanding, to not be condemnedatory, not looking for faults, someone to be a friend. We want to belong, don't we? That's part of being human. We want to be accepted. We are, as the social scientists like to put it, we are by nature social creatures. The Bible tells us as much. Because when Adam was created, God said, it is not good for man to be alone. Loneliness is not natural. Loneliness is not appropriate. And we all try to overcome it in some ways. But what concerns me this morning, and apparently concerned the writers of the Proverbs, is that sometimes our natural drive for friends and for friendship overwhelms our good sense. Sometimes our drive for friends is not founded upon the fear of the Lord, but takes on its own autonomous life, its own self justifying existence, its own independent place in our experience. And when that happens, then without knowing it, without thinking about it, without being malicious regarding it, the drive for friendships becomes idolatrous. That's what I want to talk to you about this morning then, wise companions, how to choose your friends. And I want to especially get the young people in our congregation to be paying attention. Now, young people, you know that you should be paying attention to your pastor's sermon every Lord's day. I don't wish to suggest that. There are some times where it's appropriate for you to listen and other times where you can tune out. You should always be paying attention. And toward that end, I suggest that our young people bring notebooks to church and take notes. And that can become a temptation for doodling as well. I realize that if you bring a notebook and you try to pay attention and write down what you think the pastor is trying to say in some sense of order, what he is getting at, that will help you to pay attention, will help you to remember. Now, adults don't need to do that sort of thing. I know you have no problems with your minds wandering paying attention, but that's just advice for young people today. Nevertheless, young people, you should be listening every Lord's day to the sermon. But today we are going to say some things that are really important for you as you're growing up. Because the Bible says that when you have friends, it should be a matter of choice, a matter of deliberation. Your friends, friends should be picked by you in a way that pleases God. And I think if we're honest with each other, young people, that is not often the way we end up with our friends. We sometimes end up with our friends without thinking about it. It's just whoever pays attention to us, becomes our friend. Sometimes we pick our friends because we'd like to be popular at school. So we choose somebody that looks to be popular with everybody else. Sometimes we choose our friends because we think we can get something from them. Maybe they've got some kind of neat computer thing that you want. You'd like to be close to that person. And so there are good and bad reasons for choosing our friends. And today, if you will listen to the sermon, God's word will help you to know how to choose your friends. The first thing we should notice from Proverbs 13, verse 20 this morning is the sanctifying effect of godly friends. The first part of Proverbs 13:20 says, Walk with wise men and thou shalt be wise. Boy, there's a world of wisdom and good counsel for you right there. Spend your time with wise people. Talk with them. See how they respond to life situations. See how they apply the word of God to their situation. Notice their attitudes, their emotions, notice their choices, notice the kind of people they are. Walk with wise people and it's going to rub off on you. Your associations will always rub off on you, for better or for worse. By the way, in 1st Corinthians 15, verse 33, the apostle Paul renders one of his famous don't be deceived axioms. You know how Paul tends to do that from time to time. He says, now don't be deceived. It's just at a point like this we tend to rationalize. It's just at a point like this we tend to make excuses for ourselves. It's just at a point like this that we tend to say, oh well, that's an old wives tale, or I don't have to worry about that, or that's too general. It doesn't apply to me. Paul often in his epistle says, now don't be deceived. And here he says, don't be deceived. Bad companions corrupt good morals. Also, don't think that that's just some kind of platitude that you can dismiss. It's true. You hang around with bad people and you will become bad. It will corrupt your good conduct. It will bring you down. Don't be deceived about that. Don't start making excuses. Don't have this pious cop out while I'm being evangelistic, even though you're really not. Don't think that you can spend all your time with people who use foul language and that will not work its way into your language. Don't Think you can spend all your time with people who don't really care about the things of the Lord and you're going to want a godly attitude. Don't believe that when you spend all your time in an entertainment society focused on what pleases us or pleases the body or sensual, that you aren't going to acquire those kinds of tastes. Paul says, don't be deceived. Bad companions corrupt good morals. Proverbs 13:20 gives us the other side of that picture. The people we hang around with rub off on us. And it says, if you walk with wise men, you're going to become wise. And so we might call this education by friendship. There's all sorts of ways of being educated in this world. One of the ways we are educated is by coming to the worship assembly on the Lord's Day. This is the center of education. And I happen to believe, whether I'm in the pulpit or not, that coming and hearing the preaching of God's word is the key point of education in our culture. This is the most important educational institution in our culture. But then there are schools that we attend, you realize, and there are mail order places and there are encyclopedia sets that you can buy. There's all sorts of ways to gain an education. The book of Proverbs says you are educated by your friends. And I'm afraid that many of us spend a great deal more time and deliberate much more about how to choose a college to attend than we deliberate about who will be our friend. We don't think of it in biblical terms. Friendships, we think, well, that's kind of hit and miss, right? Not a whole lot I can do about that. Friends are just who happens to develop in my life. But I choose to go to SC or I choose to go to Wheaton, or I choose to go to seminary or to study with this tutor or whatever it may be. Proverbs says you are going to be educated by your friends and you should choose them with the same deliberation, with the same thoughtfulness and reflection as you would any other educational institution. If we want to learn wisdom, then we should spend time watching wise people action. Don't hang around fools, hang around wise people. What happens if you hang around fools? My translation puts it nicely. You'll smart for it. Not you'll be smart, you'll smart. You understand? That expression is kind of archaic in the late 20th century. That means you're going to hurt for it, you're going to pay a price for it, an unpleasant price. It could be very disastrous in fact. Proverbs 13:20 offers really two reasons for carefully choosing your companions. The first reason is we will become like them. That's what we've been looking at. Choose a wise friend. Wisdom rubs off on you. The second reason is you'll come to disaster if you don't choose your friends well. And there are other proverbs that teach us these two lessons that I'd like to look at this morning. Let's look at the first reason. Why. Why we should choose our friends carefully because we're going to become like them. Choose a wise friend, you'll become wise. The opposite is true too. Choose a foolish friend. You're going to start acting foolishly. Let's turn to Proverbs 22:25. Let me back up to verse 24 to give you the context. Make no friendship with a man that is given to anger, and with a wrathful man thou shalt not go, lest thou learn his ways and get a snare to thy soul. You know, if you'll stop and think about it, I'll bet you know this is true from experience. Either in your own painful experience or you've seen it around you. I certainly have. When you're around people who tend to be hot headed to kind of badmouth, whenever things go wrong, you pick up that habit. That becomes your way of coping with things too, and so you become a hothead. Now, we usually rationalize, well, I'm not as bad as so and so, but you'd be surprised at how much we learn from so and so. We pick up those habits. Be careful who you hang around with, because you'll become like them. This is also the assumption in Proverbs 23, verse 21. Again, let me read verse 20 to give you the context. Be not among wine bibbers, among gluttonous eaters of flesh, those who eat meat. For the drunkard and the glutton shall come to poverty, and drowsiness will clothe a man with rags. Now I say that's the assumption here. The reason why you don't hang around drunkards and gluttons, it goes on to say, because the drunkard and the glutton comes to poverty. The assumption is if you're around drunkards and gluttons, then you will become a drunkard and a glutton, and you will come to poverty. Do you notice the suppressed premise there? It's unstated, it's implicit, but it's very strong. In fact, its absence almost makes the point stronger than to state it outright. You Be with wine bibbers, you be with gluttonous eaters of meat, and you're going to become like that, too. And poverty will become your clothing. You'll go from revelry to rags. And so why is it you must choose your friends carefully? The Bible says you will become like your friends. Walk with the wise, you'll get wise. Walk with drunkards, you'll tend to drink too much. Walk with angry people, you'll tend to be a hothead, too. So the first reason we need to take seriously the choice of our friends is that we're going to be like them. But the second is this. We will come to disaster if we choose our friends improperly. Walk with fools, and you'll smart for it. Or, as the Hebrew says, become a companion with fools, and you shall suffer evil for it. We can put it another way. This might be easy to remember. A little limerick for you. Fool he ends. Who? Fool he befriends. Fool he ends. You will end up a fool. If you are the person who befriends a fool, spend time with fools. You'll begin acting foolishly. And I'd like you to see, as we look through Proverbs this morning, some of the consequences of foolish companions. In the first place, the book of Proverbs tells us, foolish companions mislead us. Proverbs 16:29. A man of violence entices his neighbor and leads him in a way that is not good. It should be obvious. If we have foolish companions, they're going to lead us in a way that is not good. Proverbs 24:2 reinforces that theme when we read there. To put it in context, the first verse says, be not envious of evil men. Neither desire to be with them, for their heart studies oppression, and their lips talk of mischief. So be careful of who you're with, because if you're not, you're going to be misled. They're going to take you down the wrong road. Secondly, if you don't choose your companions well, you'll shame your parents. You know, the Book of Proverbs writes this to us with the assumption that young people care about their parents and care about the family's reputation. I would like you to imagine situations some evening, young people, especially you teenagers, where on a lark you decide to do something with some friends who are rather foolish. And lo and behold, you end up in a lot more trouble than you thought you ever would. Maybe an automobile accident, or being arrested for public drunkenness, or taking drugs and finding out that you bought them from an undercover agent. But you're only doing it for the first time, or second or third. And then the police call your parents from the station house to come down and pick you up and pay your bail and assume responsibility, which they were supposed to have for you anyway. I mean, can you visually put yourself in that situation? Can you imagine how your blood pressure would go up, how your mouth would be dry and your palms would sweat just to know that your father is coming down to the police station to pick you up? Well, that's a dramatic illustration of what Proverbs is getting at. We don't always end up with the police, but you know, our lifestyle sometimes shames our parents. Look at Proverbs 28, verse 7. Whoso keepeth the law is a wise son, but he that is a companion of gluttons shames his father. When you hang around with the wrong kind of people who show no self control, when you hang around with gluttons rather than a wise son who keeps the law, then you are ashamed to your father. In Proverbs 29:3, Whoso loveth wisdom, rejoiceth his father, but he that keepeth company with harlots wasteth his substance. That is another point being built into that last verse. But again, the contrast there is between the son who brings honor to his parents and the son who consorts with harlots. And should I make it clear to you young people, teenagers in particular, it makes no difference whether the woman takes money for her services. She may be just a common loose woman, but you consort with people like that and you shame your family. The book of Proverbs says, be careful of your companions. One, they will mislead you. Two, they will shame your family, bring disgrace upon your father and your mother. Thirdly, they will bring you down and bring calamity upon you. Proverbs 24:22, Verse 21 says, My son, fear thou Jehovah and the King, and company not with them that are rebellious, for their calamity shall rise suddenly, and the destruction from them both. Who knoweth it? Be very careful if you hang around with people given to a rebellious spirit who do not have self control. If you hang around with people who are revolutionaries, if you will, and you'll never know what kind of calamity might come upon you from either the king or jehovah himself. Proverbs 29:3. Whoso loveth wisdom, rejoiceth his father. But he that keepeth company with harlots, what will happen? It will waste away his substance you will lose your money, you will lose your dignity, and who knows what calamity will come upon your head. Be careful who you hang around with. You may find yourself in trouble far deeper than you ever imagined or intended. And so choose your friends well. Finally, the Bible says self destruction instead of self respect will be your lot in this world if you don't choose your friends well. Proverbs 29:24. Whoso is a partner with the thief, hateth his own soul. He uttereth the adjuration. He heareth the adjuration and uttereth nothing. Notice the first part. Whoso is a partner with the thief, hateth his own soul. It's not just that he hates others, it's not just that he hates Jehovah or his parents, but he hates himself. He lacks self respect. He. He does not love himself. He does not care for himself, and whether it's witting or unwitting, he's acting in a suicidal way. He hates himself. I hope that reminds you, if you can go all the way back to the beginning of our series, to chapter one in Proverbs verses 10 to 19, where that is precisely the point developed, that those who engage in thievery, who gang up on other people, turn out to set a snare for their own souls. It is really self destructive to engage in a life sin and so choose your companions carefully. If you don't, you'll become like them and secondly, you will come to disaster. At this point we need to take just a moment to talk about something we would not ordinarily think of under this subject matter. We would not have categorized this under companionship, but the book of Proverbs does. And for that reason we need to rethink ourselves and recategorize our understanding of life and our experience in life. My point is just this, that sometimes you become a companion with someone else through silence. It's what we might call silent complicity is a form of companionship. Turn back to Proverbs 29:24 where you were a moment ago and notice the second part of that verse. We've already read that a person who. A person who is a partner with a thief hates his own soul. The second part says, he heareth the adjuration and utters nothing. I wonder if you know what that's all about. He hears the adjuration. Leviticus 5:1 would give you some help in understanding that in a court of law an oath has to be taken. An adjuration is uttered that if you do not speak the truth, then the curses of God come upon you. And here we have a person who is considered a partner with the thief. And apparently the reason he's a partner is because he's heard the adjuration and he won't utter anything. The situation is this, you know, something that would help the court to convict somebody. You hear the adjuration. The oath has been taken, you're in a perjured situation, and your silence makes you a partner with the thief. Silent complicity. You may not have broken into the house, you may not have cheated on the taxes. You may not be the one who actually performed the evil deed, but the Bible says you witnessed it. And because you witnessed it and will not bear testimony to it in court, you are as good as the thief himself. We don't like that way of thinking. We like to believe we can be right on the edge of evil, you know, and we can kind of be have this vicarious excitement of seeing it going down, you know, and then we back off and we had nothing to do with it. The Bible says you see it, say nothing about it. You're as guilty as the person who did it. Psalm 50, verse 18. I trust you all know this verse. Well, the Bible tells us of the condemnation of God because you consented with the thief. You consented with the thief. What do you think of the apostle Paul? He was not at the time the apostle Paul. He was then Saul, the persecutor of the church. And how at the martyrdom of Stephen, when Stephen was stoned to death, unjustly, Saul stood and he held the coats of those who were doing the stoning. And Luke puts it very bluntly, very briefly when he says, and Saul was consenting. Saul didn't throw any stones at Stephen, but he's as good as a murderer because he held the coats of those who did. I want us all to learn that. That companionship is not just those you call up and say, let's go to the movie. Companionship is not simply those you hang around with, those who you go to lunch with from work. Companionship involves silence when others are doing evil and you're around to witness it and you don't raise a testimony to it. We are companions with the world when we do that sort of thing. And so what have we learned this morning so far? We've learned to notice the sanctifying effect of godly friends. Walk with wise people, you'll become wise. We've learned that there are two reasons to avoid evil companions. We'll become like them and. And will come to disaster. And We've learned just now as well that we are evil friends with these evil people when we are just silent in the face of their misdeeds. Now, there are a number of kinds of companions that the book of Proverbs counsels us to avoid. I don't want you to get the idea these are the only people you should avoid, but there are some who come up for special mention, and this is kind of interesting. In the first set of examples, I think it's rather obvious. We learn that we should not hang around with abusive people. We should not hang around with rebels, we should not hang around with harlots, we should not hang around with thieves. Let's look at those verses very quickly. Proverbs 16:29. We'll be repeating some of what we've already read. A man of violence, an abusive man, entices his neighbor and leads him in the way. That is not good. So beware of abusive people. Do you know people who tend to have a bad mouth, who to tend, tend to be bullies, who tend to push their way around, who are prone to be pugnacious and want to fight. Don't hang around with such people. Don't be envious of evil men. Proverbs 24:1 says, neither desire to be with them, for their heart studies oppression and their lips talk of mischief. I'm not talking simply then of a person who likes to get into a pushing match or a fist fight with others. We're talking about people who, who study oppression want to be abusive with their words too. Avoid abusive people. Whether it's physical or verbal abuse. Don't hang around with them. The Proverbs is not saying, if people treat you bad, don't hang around them. You know, you hardly need an inspired word from God to learn that lesson. People are punching you out. Don't go back for more. But you know what our problem is? If there's somebody verbally punching another person out and we're not the ones taking the abuse, we tend to stand by and think that's okay. The Bible says, you know somebody like that, you know somebody with a bad mouth or somebody who is quick to go to fisticuffs, then stay away from that person. Stay away from rebels as well. We read that in Proverbs 24, verses 21 and 22. My son, fear thou Jehovah and the King and company not with them that are rebellious or that are given to change. That is, those who are revolutionary, who want to overturn the established authority, don't company with them. Because both The King and Jehovah are going to punish such people. You never know what's going to happen. But the point here is, don't hang around with such people. Do you know people like that? Do you know people who are insidious, who like to undermine authority structures? People who speak against parents? Do you know people who speak against the authorities at school, who talk down the police? Do you know people who are involved in trying to undermine the law and order of our society? Proverbs says, don't hang around people like that. Don't hang around with harlots. Proverbs 29:3 We've read whoso loveth wisdom, rejoices his father, but he that keeps company with harlots wastes his substance. And then Proverbs 29:24, the other violent example. Whoso has a partner with the thief hates his own soul. And so we have a rather obvious moral lesson here. Don't hang around with abusive people, with rebels, with harlots and thieves. But you know what's surprising to me? There are less obvious examples in the book of Proverbs too, equally valid examples in the book of Proverbs that we don't think about. And I'd like to share some of those with you. Proverbs 20, verse 19. Who should you be avoiding as a friend? He that goeth about as a talebearer revealeth secrets, therefore accompany not with him that openeth wide his lips. Wow, now there's a devastating one. Don't be a companion with those who talk too much, those who like to reveal secrets, those who open wide the mouth. You know somebody like that, you know somebody who likes to just, you know, gossip, go on and on and on. You know, somebody who's just always talking, doesn't seem to be able to stop. Don't be a companion with such a person. You know, someone who just loves to share all the dirty stuff with you, the secrets of others. Well, in the first place you ought to be smart enough to realize that that's the way this person is. You never know know what secrets about you are going to be revealed to others. But the book of Proverbs says this person's going to bring you down. Don't hang around with those who talk too much. Secondly, don't hang around with the hot headed. We've read this, but it bears repeating. Proverbs 22, verses 24 and 25 make no friendship with the man given to anger. And with a wrathful man thou shalt not go. That tells you why, because you'll learn his ways. It'll be a snare to your soul. Do you know someone who's hot headed? You know, someone who's always flying off the handle? Now how often have I heard people say, yeah, well, I understand what he or she means, you know, I'm used to that. You just have to, you just have to know them. The Bible says don't get to know them. You have somebody that has that characteristic, somebody that has that bad habit. Stay clear of them. Those who talk too much, those who are hot headed. And the one that we're going to have some difficulty with, maybe from Proverbs 23:20 21. Be not among wine bibbers among gluttonous eaters of meat. For the drunkard and the glutton shall come to poverty and drowsiness will clothe a man with rags. You know, somebody who eats too much. Now, I'm going to let you off the hook a little bit this morning because I see how worried some of you appear. The face of this verse. We're not talking about somebody who breaks their diet here, okay? And we're not talking about somebody who's pleasantly plump. We're talking about somebody here who just does not have any self control when it comes to food, a glutton. Someone who just has got to have more and more meat. The person who is the food analog of the drunkard who cannot stay away from alcohol. The Bible says, be not among wine bibbers and among gluttons, gluttonous eaters of meat. See what these people have in common, Those who talk too much, those who are hot headed and those who eat and drink too much. What they all have in common is a lack of self control, isn't that right? Lack of self control over their mouths, lack of self control over their appetites, lack of self control over their tempers, their anger. You know, somebody who lacks self control. The Bible says, don't hang around with such a person. Now, if you've been paying attention, however, my guess is there's a real big question that arises at this point. What about Jesus? Didn't Jesus hang around with wine bibbers and gluttons? Wasn't he a friend of sinners? Isn't that something he was criticized for? And yet we're supposed to be like him. I think rather than just have a passing remark about that, I'd like to take a little excursus in this morning's message to deal with that particular question. Did Jesus violate Proverbs 23:20 when it says, don't be among wine bibbers or among gluttonous eaters of meat. Was Jesus repudiating that Old Testament ethic in favor of a new enlightened New Testament approach to things? Of course he was not. Not the one who said that every jot and tittle of the Old Testament law was being fulfilled in his life. Not the one who said, not a bit of this will pass away till heaven and earth passes away. Not the one who said, which one of you indicts me of sin, knowing that they would go to the Old Testament to do it if they wish to. Now, Jesus didn't violate this verse. And so we need to really look at those New Testament passages rather briefly this morning so we understand how it is. Proverbs tells us the story. Stay away from wine bibbers. And yet Jesus is accused of being among them. Let's turn to Matthew 11:19. Keep your finger in Proverbs. We won't be in the book of Matthew that long. But if you look at Matthew 11:19, you'll see the accusation that I'm referring to. The Son of Man came eating and drinking, and they say, behold, a gluttonous man and a wine bibber, friend of publicans and sinners. There's the accusation. Proverbs has been violated. It says, don't be among wide bibbers. Don't be among gluttons. And here's the Son of Man, a glutton and a wine bibber, a friend of sinners. Let's learn to do some biblical interpretation. Let's read it in context. Now, verses 16 to 19. The first thing to notice is the ill intent of the cross critic who says that. Remember, it's a critic who says, he's a wine bibber, a glutton, and a friend of publicans and sinners. And the ill intent is being exposed by Jesus himself. And verse 16. But whereunto shall I liken this generation? It is like unto children sitting in the marketplaces who call unto their fellows and say, we piped unto you and you did not dance. We wailed and you did not mourn. Now, children don't play those kind of games in our culture, so it's a little odd. But, you know, children have the same personality that Jesus is talking about here. Have you ever seen a child who refuses to be happy? You ever seen a child that you say, okay, let's play a happy game and they won't be happy? Then you say, let's play a sad game or a quiet game. And they won't do that either. That is to say, you sometimes have children who will not be satisfied, who in their stubbornness, in their childishness, in their immaturity, refused to be satisfied with any overtures. And Jesus said, those people who are criticizing me are exactly like that. And here's how he explains it. For John came neither eating nor drinking. And they said, he has a demon. So here they have John the ascetic, the man who wears the camel hair coat, the man who eats locusts and honey out in the wilderness, the rough guy who, who does not engage in the partying of common society. And they say, oh, he must have a demon. He's one of those people who doesn't go around eating and drinking. Jesus says, and the Son of Man came eating and drinking. And they say, oh, a gluttonous man and a wine bibber. Just like children. They won't dance when you pipe, and they won't mourn when you wail. They just won't be satisfied. They wouldn't accept John, they wouldn't accept me. And if you don't mind the expression, Jesus says, you see, I'm being damned if I do, damned if I don't. And the problem here is not in the one or ones who are being evaluated, it's in the evaluators. And so he says, notice the ill intent of the critic who is accusing Jesus of being gluttonous and a wine bibber. Secondly, notice how wisdom is justified. We really can't avoid that because the book of Proverbs is teaching us wisdom. And so if Jesus made the mistake of violating this proverb that we're looking at, then then of course wisdom is not seen in his life. But how does Jesus end this statement? And wisdom is justified by her children? Am I being wise in my lifestyle and ministry? Jesus says, evaluate the results. Evaluate the children that come from this way of living. Jesus says, you need to pay attention to the results of the ministry. The results of my ministry are obviously not drunkenness or harlotry. The results of my ministry are not dishonesty and greed. And so if I'm consorting with harlots and gluttons and drunkards and publicans and tax gatherers and all those that are outcasts in your society, then let wisdom be justified by her children. Consider the fruits of my ministry. Did anyone ever come into Jesus in a meaningful way who went on in their sin saying, jesus accepts me just the way I am, I love you just the way you are. Jesus says, right Remain being a harlot, Remain being a tax gatherer. Stay in your greed, stay in your gluttony. What's it to me? I'm just here to say everybody, you're okay, I'm okay, we love each other. Warm fuzzy time. That wasn't Jesus approach. Surely he was with wine bibbers. Surely he was with gluttons and with prostitutes and with tax gatherers. But he changed their lives. Wisdom is justified by her children. So notice the ill intent of his critics. Notice how wisdom is justified. And notice thirdly, that Jesus motivation was clearly to reach the lost. Jesus was not making friends with these people because he was lonely. Jesus was not trying to find somebody who would hear him out or have a good meal with him, somebody to talk to late at night. Jesus wasn't becoming palsy wowsy with those who were worldly and rebellious against the law of God. He was befriending them to change their lives. And you see that in Matthew 9, 10, 12, the same kind of criticism comes against Jesus. Here it came to pass as he sat at meat in the house. Behold, many publicans and sinners came and sat down with Jesus and his disciples. And when the Pharisees saw it, they said unto his disciples, why eateth your teacher with the publicans and the sinners? But when he heard it, he said, they that are whole have no need of a physician. But they that are sick. Jesus said, you want to know why eat with people who are outlandish sinners? Because sick people need a physician. And those who think they have everything worked out in their lives, those who are whole don't need the physician. I've come to those who are willing to admit they need my saving ministry. You obviously don't think you need it. That accounts for why I eat with wine bibbers. We don't have time to look at this. But in Luke 15, verse 2, same criticism comes against Jesus. And Jesus uses the occasion to explain how a shepherd that has brought in 99 of 100 of his sheep goes out looking for the one that's lost. Jesus says, you want to know why I eat with wine givers and sinners? Why I consort with prostitutes and tax gatherers? Because a good shepherd goes looking for that one lost sheep. So what was Jesus motivation? My point very simply is, yes, he was friendly toward these people, yes, he had meals with them, but not in violation of proverbs. Because Wisdom is justified by her children, he was not gaining friends for himself. In the way that we use the word friend, we might Say he was being friendly because he was ministering to them. And I would say that the issue for us, therefore the issue for us today will be the terms of the companionship. If you want to know whether you are being a Christlike person, consorting with those who are, well, despicable sinners in our society, if you want to know whether you're being Christlike or violating what Proverbs tells you, then ask yourself, what are the terms of our companionship? Do we associate with sinners for the purpose of reaching them with the Gospel, and therefore we consort with them on our terms? Let me put it bluntly. You don't evangelize a prostitute by going to bed with her. But if you talk to a prostitute even, even in the foyer of her house of ill repute, for the sake of telling her she is more important than this sexual perversion would indicate that she is valuable in God's sight and she is perverting that value and she is guilty before God and there's another kind of life available to her. If that's what you're doing, then the terms of your relationship are your terms, not hers. And so you consort with sinners on your terms, not on theirs. On the other hand, if the purpose for being with them is to be like them, to be accepted by them, if you go hang around bars not because you want to evangelize people or meet the down and outs who need to hear the gospel, but you go to these bars because you're looking for a friend who can listen to your poor misery, then you're associating on their terms, not your own. And so it's a very easy matter. Are you being Christ like? Are you being the fool of the book of Proverbs? What are the terms of the companionship, your terms, Godly terms, or the terms of the world? We need to see at the end of our consideration this morning about having wise companions, that when we envy sinners as our friends, that this is really being pitted against the fear of the Lord. Proverbs 24:1 tells us, Be not envious of evil men. Neither desire to be with them. That's a terrible problem. And temptation we all have, let's admit it, we all have that problem. I think teenagers suffer, especially in this area. I just this weekend saw this new movie, Can't Buy Me Love, and I'm not recommending the movie to you, but that and many other movies deal with the same theme. The idea of watching what would you do just to be with the in group now, the in Group in a high school setting manifests itself much differently than the in group at your work or in your neighborhood or in your family or whatever it may be. But what would you do to be with the in crowd, to be accepted, to be thought well of? What would you pay for that? The Bible says you shouldn't even ask yourself that question because you shouldn't envy to be there. Don't envy sinners. Proverbs 23:17 explains the whole situation. Let not thy heart envy sinners, but be thou in the fear of Jehovah all day long. You know what happens when we start envying to be with those who are worldly, those who are abusive, those who talk too much, those who eat too much or drink too much, those who are thieves, those who are revolutionary. You know what happens when we envy to be with the wrong kind of people? We've forgotten. The fear of the Lord, which is the beginning of wisdom, is the very first point of our religious experience, to fear the Lord. And that's why I said at the beginning of this morning's message that sometimes friendships and the desire for them take on a life all their own, separate from our religion, as though it's just out there in the secular part of life. And I don't have to relate that to being a Christian. But the Bible says you must fear the Lord and not envy to be with sinners, not desire to be with sinners. I wonder if our lust for friends doesn't make us enemies of God. Is that too strongly put? You think I'm venturing out too far now? Have I just, you know, really overstated the case? Well, you see, it's James who poses that question, not me. In James 4:4, would you please notice what the inspired word of God puts to us? James says, you adulteresses. Know you not that the friendship of the world is enmity with God. Whosoever therefore, would be a friend of the world makes him himself an enemy of God. Are you God's enemies this morning, children? Are you trying to be at war with God by how you choose your friends? Teenagers, those who you hang out with, do they make you the enemies of God? Adults, parents, all of you? Are you adulteresses this morning? The Bible says your love for the world, your envying of sinners, your desire to have friends that are not pleasing to God, makes you God's enemy. Those are serious words to be considered. Our lust for friends can actually put us outside the kingdom of God and an enemy of the Lord himself. And so I want to end this Morning by simply saying, all of us, all of us as guilty sinners, need to choose the best friend available, and that's the Lord Jesus Christ. Because in your loneliness and in your despair and sometimes in your desire for a reputation, you have made choices which in fact have alienated you from God. You have made choices which have not been honoring to the Lord, that have not been pleasing to him, have not reflected the fear of the Lord, but rather the love of men. And that has made us to be enemies of God. But the book of Romans tells us these glorious words of Paul. Romans 5, 10, 11. For if, while we were enemies, we were reconciled to God through the death of his Son, much more being reconciled shall we be saved by his life. And not only so will we also rejoice in God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have now received the reconciliation. Those of us who have been so interested in friendship with the world have been reconciled to God through the death of his son. We made ourselves enemies of God because we didn't fear him, because we didn't make him number one in our lives, because he was not the priority. When we chose our friends, we may have just drifted into our friendships. We may have rationalized what our friendships were doing to us. And we became enemies of God. God. But Jesus died on the cross. And who is it that died on the cross so that we might be reconciled to the one we have become an enemy of for our sinful behavior? Who is it that died on the cross? The same one who said in John 15, verse 13, Greater love hath no man than this. Than a man lay down his life for his friends. And Jesus says, you are my friends if you do what I tell you. Is there any more pleasant, any more relieving any more comforting word in all the scripture, but to have the Son of God who came from the throne of glory into this miserable world say to you, and you are my friends. Does that ever help you when you're lonely? Does that ever help you when you feel guilty and alienated from God? Does that ever lift you when you need to be lifted and give you the right advice Move. You need it to remember that Jesus said, and you are my friends, and I'll die for you. And his friends do what he asked them to do. If Christ is our friend, you know we're going to be uncomfortable around those who don't like Jesus. If Christ is our friend, we're going to be very uncomfortable with those who refuse to serve him. We're going to find it very confusing and Disconcerting that there are people who don't know what life is all about and yet they do not choose to serve Jesus. There are people who have not worked out a right standing with God, and yet they despise the Son of God who came to be our friend. It's going to really bother you that there are those who hate the man who is a friend of sinners. If you are a Christian, this is not just for the young people, it's for all of you. Now, if you are a Christian and Jesus is your friend, then let that guide you. And when you choose your friends, make wise companions, those who will increase your wisdom and your godliness in this world. And when you are friendly toward those who do not love the Lord, make it for the same reason that Jesus was a friend of sinners, that he might bring them back to God. Let's pray. Lord, we learned some very heavy lessons this morning to know that our choice of friends is a reflection of our religious standing before you. Indeed, it shows whether we fear you above all and make you the highest priority in our lives. We ask that you would reform us then, because all of us have fallen into the bad habit of having the wrong kind of friends and accepting their behavior and rationalizing it and rationalizing our compromise into with them. Forgive us for our sins. Forgive us for making ourselves your enemies. By loving worldliness and those who are in the world. Help us to be a friend toward those who are alienated from you for the same reason that Jesus became our friend. To win us back, to draw us through repentance and set us on the right track of living. And above all, this morning accept our grateful thanks, our heartfelt thanks that while we were yet enemies, Christ died for us. Christ befriended us. And Christ is a friend that will never leave us. We do pray, Lord Jesus, that your friendship to us and ours to you would help us to choose the right kind of companions in this world who will have a sanctifying effect upon us, who will lead us to glorify your name more purely, both in word and in deed. We pray in your precious name. Amen.