Blake Robert Templeton says hard conversations fail when you come in as a warrior, frustrated and demanding. Instead, shift to shepherd (asking good questions to help them think differently) and king (providing direction when needed). Moving between these roles lets people examine their own beliefs instead of just pushing back.
So when we're actually helping someone who actually has a problem and they're creating a rift and you're with them on a regular basis, the first thing to do is you've got to figure out what role you're in, what role they're in. So if you come in as warrior, it's never going to go well because that always will come across as frustration, rigidness, demanding. So what we've got to do is we've got to step into shepherd and king so we can float between shepherd and king. Shepherd is not actually trying to solve any problems. He's going to ask quality questions and help them actually get out of the sandbox and like figure out why they actually believe what they believe.
