Lacks Self Control book review 18+ content and Author Imposter Syndrome - LIVE

All right. Hey, folks, it's Julie Broad, author and host of the First Look Book review show. And that's what you're watching right now. So welcome. If you're there live, definitely give me a hello, let me know that you're there. And if you're watching the replay still, give me a hello. Thumbs up comment question. Whether you're watching this on Facebook or YouTube or wherever you've caught the show, make sure you let me know that you're there. And yeah, it'll be great. So today we have a shorter show, I think less content, more jam packed, still tons of fun. Hey, Mom. All right, so welcome. We're just getting started. So what we're going to do today is we're going to cover book review of a brand new book. It actually is launching two today. It's called Lax Self Control by Roy Sekoff. And we'll be doing the book review for that. Then we also are going to just quickly talk about how you can get your nonfiction book reviewed if you're interested in that. And of course, an update on our internal writing contest. We've got some numbers for you. Hey, Paul, welcome. Thanks for joining in. We've got some numbers for you on who won our internal writing contest. It wasn't me. And when I say internal writing contest, I'm talking about our book launchers clients. But I'm writing a book, too, so I joined in on the contest, but I did get my butt kicked. So I'm going to tell you who won and the prize that this person is taking home. Hey, Jacqueline, welcome to the show. I'm assuming the sound is okay, since you guys are saying hello and not complaining. So that's fantastic. Okay, we're going to talk. Our topic of the day is imposter syndrome. So I've got a few comments and thoughts around that. I know it's something that pretty much every nonfiction author has to face at some point in their writer's journey. Paul, you can tell me if a children's book author actually feels imposter syndrome ever as well, because I kind of feel like everybody faces this at some point. But I know definitely when you're writing a nonfiction book and you're thinking I have to put myself out there as the expert. And there's some pressure and different types of people feel different pressures around this. But pretty much universally everybody I know that's writing or written a nonfiction book goes through this. We're going to have a quick chat about that, give you some tips around it, and we're going to do the draw for the Friday commenter. And if you don't know what that's all about, I'll explain it when we get there. And I also thought I might throw in an extra topic around Amazon reviews disappearing because I've been on a few publishing forums lately where people are going, I've lost a bunch of my reviews. What's happened? And I have not an inside scoop on this. I've just been reading up on it. And if that's happened to you, I've got a couple not tips, but just explanations as to what's going on. All right. Okay, awesome. Imposter syndrome for sure. Nonfiction authors. But yeah, Paul's written children's books, so I was curious if children's book authors feel this imposter syndrome too. So when we get to that, you can let us know. Paul. Okay, so today's first look look review. I'm really excited to share this one with you. I've got it right here. All right, so this book is called Lacks Self Control, True Stories I Waited Until My Parents Died to Tell by Roy Secauf. So like I said, it just launched today. So you can check it out on Amazon, any bookstore, all those kind of places. Now, if you don't know who Roy is, he is the former founding editor of Huffington Post. Basically, he was the guy beside Arianna Huffington while they built Huffington Post to what it is today before it sold out, blah, blah, blah. So he left a few years ago to spend more time with his daughter. Oh, good. I'm glad, Paul. Loving the mug. I won. Great. That's awesome. Okay, so I'm gonna focus on this. All right, so as I was saying, Roy Secoff is the founding editor, former founding editor of Huffington Post. He left a couple years ago to spend time with his daughter. And after a year of, as he called it, detox from the world of Huffington Post and media world, he decided that this was what he wanted to do. And he has some great stories in there and well, let's get to it. So he is a masterful storyteller and I have to tell you that his years at Huffington Post show because he is brilliant at writing chapter headlines that make you want to read the book. So I'll just give you a couple tasters of it. The Time Chevy Chase Grabbed My balls. That's chapter four, the snake man cometh. That's another chapter, the McDonald's of sex. So yeah, he knows how to write. Eye catching curiosity, Creating headlines. Absolutely. A five star review. It was easy read. I got A copy on the weekend and I blew through it Monday night and Sunday night. Just an hour each night, hour and a bit each night and I read the entire book. So Easy Friday. Fun, humorous read. You'll definitely, if you're looking for an entertaining read, you will definitely enjoy it. However, this book is not for you if you're easily offended. There's insights into the adolescent mind of a man that some people may not want to have. And Roy doesn't hold back. He goes into details and is very open about the first porno that he watched, his dad's porn collection. A porn shop. I don't even know what you call these places. You know, where you go in and they used to have booths. I don't know if they still exist. So I'm saying used to because he was talking about this when he was quite young. But they go into booths and you give them a quarter or a buck. And so you watched a film, but that wasn't quite doing it for him anymore. So he went and went to watch the live show and he actually details the conversation that he had with the woman who was giving the live show. So it is shocking at times. Very shocking, Very humorous though. Very well written, you know, very. As shocking as it is, it's still tasteful, but also it's not for you if you don't like graphic content. Hey, welcome everyone that's just joined. I'll be saying hello to you personally in a second. So if you don't like graphic content, he goes into great detail about colonics. Colonics. I don't even know how you say it. Colonics. You know, the stuff. Backdoor goes into great detail about those things. And I'm talking like I gagged at one point. So there's a part where they actually he and his roommate put something in the freezer. So yes, if you're not into that kind of graphic content, this might not be for you as well. And finally, if you're looking for business advice, while he does tell one story about how he got one of the Kardashians on his Huffington Post live show, despite a very reluctant and, you know, pointed PR person, how he still got that person on the show, you know, really wasn't a business advice type thing because, you know, he goes on to say how she shared some very personal details on the show afterwards and that was really the bulk of the story. But if you want a light hearted, easy, fun read, this book is it, I highly recommend it if you want an entertaining read and some funny stories that were True. So it's highly deliverable or, sorry, highly enjoyable. Delivers on entertainment on every single page. So I do recommend you check out Roy Seekauf's lacks self control. So that's today's first look book review. Check it out. If that sounds like something that you would enjoy. If you're, like laughing and, you know, you're not one of those people that fits those other three criteria I listed there, then you're probably going to enjoy it. And you get some celebrity stuff, too. You get to hear about the time Oprah hugged him and what she whispered in his ear and, you know, a few other little details, too. So you might enjoy that, too. All right, cool. So now I'm going to say hello. Oh, I'm blushing. I'm blushing because I actually was a little embarrassed by some of this content. You know, Roy got to me. It's also hot in here. I shut my door so there'd be less noise. So that could also be it. But yeah, I am kind of embarrassed by some of the content that came out. But I did enjoy the read. So there you go. All right. So. Hi. Wizard in the house. Good to see you. Let's see if there's anybody else. I didn't say. Oh, Dave, hello. Welcome, welcome. Thanks for making the time. Okay, so how to get your book entered to be one of the books that is reviewed on the show and the next review we do on the next show, which is happening on June 26th at 2:00pm Pacific and 5:00pm Eastern Standard Time. I will be reviewing a viewer's book. So once a month I draw. So all you have to do is when you're watching this on YouTube, just go ahead and put your book in there. The only thing is that it has to be a nonfiction book and something I can buy from the United States. Although we did make it work when I had a UK book on the previous show, she sent me a PDF copy. But yeah, if your book is not available in the United States, it's a little tricky. You'll have to send me a copy directly. Okay. I don't know what you're saying. Sure. Too Jacqueline. But it couldn't possibly be that you're doubting I was embarrassed or a little uncomfortable by some of the content in the book. All right, so. Oh, and you have to subscribe to the YouTube channel. So first you subscribe to the YouTube channel. Second, you go ahead and post a link with a few details about your nonfiction book into any YouTube video. But you're better off to do it on the more recent ones because some of my older ones that are getting a lot of views, there's lots of comments and so it could get buried there. So stick to the newer ones and post it there and we'll draw for the review on the next show. Okay, so in case you're just tuning in, I want to remind you that we have our first writers retreat happening here in la. Part of it will happen in this office. Not there, but there's a great boardroom around the corner. Hey Brian, welcome. Good to see you. And we'll be doing the retreat on the 21st, 22nd, 23rd. It's going to be fantastic. We've nailed down the agenda. Now we're going to do, we're going to have eight hours of solid writing, but we're also going to throw in a few, few writing sprints. So you know, if you're into workout, it's going to be like your high intensity training where you go really hard, you can't do anything but write for 15 minutes, then you take a five minute break and then you do it again for 15 minutes. Kind of like the burpees. Yesterday I had to do what I called a burpee sandwich at CrossFit. We had, you know, a seven minute, you know, deadlifts and then it was seven minutes straight of burpees and then seven minutes of another exercise. So I called that the burpee sandwich. But that was, I did 100 burpees in seven minutes. It was pretty gross. Okay, so but we won't make you do burpees at the writing retreat. We will get your outline nailed down, make sure you know exactly what you're writing, spend lots of time working on your book. And we've got a couple of really brilliant marketing folks in the room who are going to give you some great tips on being media ready, where to sell your book, how to sell it, how to pitch it. I mean, if you're working with book launchers, we're doing a lot of that for you. But it's still good to know when you're writing your book because it can help you carve out the right content so that it can be marketable. And you're going to have some one on one time with the writing coach and with our main book marketing person to help you craft a great book that's going to sell and achieve your goals. So it's going to be a fantastic couple of days. Book launchers.com juneretreat if you're interested. Oh, and it's already There. Thank you, Jacqueline. Wonderful. And thank you to everyone who is putting hearts and thumbs up and smiling and laughing. It makes this show so much fun for me when these little icons float across screen. And of course, when you comment and if you're watching the replay, you can still do that. It still makes me happy. And of course, you can still ask questions and comment afterwards as well. Okay, now the next thing is the big, dark question of who am I to write a book? Right. Who am I to write a book? So this is often called imposter syndrome, and it's something that we see. Oh, thanks, guys. This is awesome. Oh, why does somebody make sad face? Somebody made a sad face. Are you sad because we're halfway through the show? That's what it is, isn't it? Okay, so who am I to write this book? The struggle with imposter syndrome is real, and I find that especially with business professionals and people who run their own business and they're at the top of their game in some areas. They struggle with this, I think, even more than some other people. So if you're struggling with imposter syndrome, know that that is totally normal, and it is probably a good thing because it will help you tighten up your message. It will help you do a little extra research and go a little bit deeper to create an even better book. Now, I just want to. I'm just looking at my notes here. I want to share this. Where is it? Oh, here. So Elizabeth Gilbert, if you're not familiar with her, she wrote Eat, Pray, Love, and she has a book called Big Magic. I love this book. Not necessarily for everyone. I can see it being something women or people who are more on the creative side of things might appreciate more than, you know, the hardcore, A type business person. But I love it because she, you know, she's a writer, and she talks about creativity. She also has a great chapter here on poop sandwiches. She doesn't use the word poop, but I'll just call it poop sandwiches. Okay. But she talks about. She has an entire section here. I flagged it, and it says, scary, scary, scary, scary. And I don't know if you can see this, but over here, it lists all the things that you could be afraid of. You're afraid you have no talent. You're afraid you'll be rejected or criticized. You're afraid somebody else already did it better. That is a huge, huge one that comes up for me, and I'm sure a lot of other people. Sorry, my charming husband just said it looked like Big Bird. Turded on that cover. And then I'm talking about her chapter on poop sandwiches. And he thinks it's funny because he just mentioned poop. So you're welcome, everyone. We have hit new lows today. I've talked about porn. I've talked about porn booths and poop. This is going well. Okay, so back to the point of this, because there is a serious, real point and tip for authors here. So she's going on, you're afraid you won't be taken seriously. Okay, so she keeps going, these are all things that you're afraid of. And she can list them because she has felt this all before. And she says, listen, I don't have all day here, so I'm going to keep listing. I'm not going to keep listing fears. It's a bottomless list anyhow, and a depressing one. I'll just wrap up my summary. This Scary, scary, scary. Everything is so goddamn scary. So you're not alone. I mean, she's had some massive, massive successes in her life as a writer. And just about every author I've talked to has felt this way. I also find that perfectionists. So if you're a perfectionist, I also find that perfectionists really suffer from this feeling of imposter syndrome because they put the standards so high. And the reality is there's a lot of, I don't want to say mediocre, but your book doesn't have to be perfect. Your idea doesn't have to be perfect. And there's a lot of examples of not perfect books and ideas out there by people who weren't the absolute best in the world at what they're talking about, who are selling tons of books, created a better life for themselves, made a ton of money either directly from the book or from their speaking engagements or the business growth or all of it. And it's really about honing in on who are you trying to help and how can you help them. I mean, listen, I wouldn't. If I'm sitting there going, I need a business mentor, I might read a book by Richard Branson, but I'm probably reading that more for entertainment with a little bit of education and maybe inspiration. I'm going to go and look at somebody who's maybe five years ahead of me in business, that's done some really cool things, and I'm going to go read that person's book because that person is most likely to help me. So remember that it's about who specifically you can help. Another category of people that I find are often greatly impacted by imposter syndrome. She's down there this week. New side to the boss. Yeah, talking about me going in the gutter. Thanks, Ron. Yes, I did go in the gutter today. We will clean it up for the next show, folks. I promise. Okay, so naturally, gifted or talented people, I find, often suffer from this too, because the gift that they have that makes them really good at what they do, it comes so easily that they kind of wonder if there's value in what they have to say. Oh, poor Dave. He's sad because it's going to not be in the gutter. Well, you won't be here for the next show anyways, Dave. You'll be, I think, in Canada. Okay, So I find that people who have a gift and it comes naturally to them, they often have this imposter syndrome because they feel like it came so easily. So maybe, maybe everybody else already thinks this is easy and it's not valuable. So. And experts are also the same category because somehow a lot of experts, and you hear this a lot with celebrities, they feel like they lucked into their success somehow. And so they're always kind of looking in the mirror going like, who am I to tell you how to run a business? Who am I to tell you how to work with children? Who am I to tell you how to lose weight? You know, I'm still sneaking the ice cream bar on Saturday nights, you know, when nobody's looking, Even though I'm talking about getting six pack abs and being fit. So every single person goes through it. So take solace in the truth. In the truth. The fact that everyone feels this way. And if you don't, that's probably more cause for concern. And, and again, three things to do. I want to give you tips. Don't want to just highlight the problem. And I think number one is to talk to someone about it. And I mean this like, you know, talk to a professional more than talking to a friend, but just let them know, hey, listen, this is my book idea. This is who I'm trying to help and why and even how is there value in this? And get an honest third party feedback. And I say third party because, you know, I think a lot of times we have friends and family who are going to tell us that idea is great or that idea sucks no matter whether the idea is good or not. So get third party input. And of course, book launchers can help you with that if it's a nonfiction book. But anyone out there who has a good business mind or has experience writing and publishing and selling books, run it by them. Number two, reframe the story you're telling yourself. Because again, I think if you can kind of get to the heart of what's driving it is, you know, you probably know if you're a perfectionist or if you're an expert, that kind of feels like you lucked into it or you have a natural gift. Look in the mirror and kind of reframe that. Because almost always, you know, I think anybody who's had some level of success does have a little bit of luck. But the reality is they were digging and they were working hard and they spotted opportunities and they took risks and they did something that other people aren't willing to do. And if you reframe that story and figure out what that is, I think you're going to find the gold and a lot of power in the message that you're trying to put out there. Number three, of course, is, as I already said this, but it's so important is get clear on who you're trying to help. Who are you trying to help? How are you going to help them? And when you're super clear on that, you realize that you don't have to be like Richard Branson or Elon Musk or, you know, the Jillian Michaels of the fitness world or whoever. Whatever category you follow. I don't know who would be a good gardening example. You know, Ron, I think there's room for the wizard to be the guy. But seriously, I just think you have to figure out who you're going to help and how and focus on them and not worry about the other people out there. And if they've done it better, done it differently, you just have to be different and focused on who you're helping and how you're going to reach them and make sure that you are doing it in a way that's going to resonate and make them and get them the results that you're promising them. Okay, I think that's it. So, yeah, famous actors, authors, CEOs, most successful people. They're all most likely to have had or still have feelings of the imposter syndrome. So you're in good company. Okay, so prize time. We have two things, actually. First, let's do the internal client prize. So we had a writing contest in house for the month of May, and I'm really, really excited to announce. Actually, I closed the numbers and I didn't write them down, but, Jacqueline, you've got them, right? Okay. So. And I don't want all the numbers you don't actually. You know what, you don't have to tell me the numbers. We won't put the numbers up there. I just will say who the winner and the runner up is. So what we did was we took a starting word count on their books at the start of May, and at the end of May, we took a new word count. And of course, the person with the largest growth won. And so congratulations, Tyler, you won. You crushed everyone. I think with more than 11,000 words. I shouldn't say you crushed everyone, but you did a fantastic job of writing a lot of words last month and your prize. And also congratulations to everyone who participated because you won in that you made progress on your book and you should pat yourself on the back for carving out time to get words down on the paper. So congratulations me, because I did write, I did get some chapters done. So yay. And congratulations to Marnie, who was a runner up to Tyler. You obviously put in a lot of time too. So the prize is. There we go. Let's get it like this. So these really cool socks, it's called Sock Problems. And so, Tyler, you're going to get a link. Jaclyn's going to email you and say, yay, congratulations, Tyler. And she's going to send you a link to this website. But I want to tell you guys about Sock problems too. Not just because he's a client of ours, but because it's a really cool company and these socks are fantastic. So every pair of socks has a cause. Now, these ones are, I believe, prostate cancer. Most of them say it on the bottom. Oh, wait, here we go. Sock prostate cancer. There we go. So on the very bottom, it tells you what cause it's for.25% of every pair of socks sold goes to that specific cause. So you go on the website, you choose your cause, and you get to choose the design, of course. And 25% goes to that partner organization that they've partnered with on their Sock Problems website. So love the company, love the socks, and Tyler, you can go on, choose either your favorite cause or your favor or both. You get to get three compliments of book launchers for your hard work. But there were no losers in this contest. Everyone was a winner because everyone made progress on their book in the month of May. So thank you for that. Okay. Love funky socks. Yeah, you didn't even wash those ones. These are mine. Dave, I know you would think prostate cancer is not a woman's cancer or not a woman's sock. It is not a woman's cancer. In fact, sometimes live video. Right. Okay, final prize of the day before I bid you guys adieu. And we all write down on our calendars to be here again in two weeks. So every Friday, we have a new YouTube video coming out. And if you are the first one to comment on the video on the day it comes out. Not the first one. If you comment on the day it comes out, then you will be entered in to win a mug, which Paul already said. I think it was Paul. Right? Said you love your mug and you got it and you like the design on it, so yay. Okay, so if you comment on the Friday that the video comes out, then you'll be entered to win, and then every two weeks, we draw from all of those commenters, and you get a mug. So we've had Kevin McGuire on an absolute hot winning streak lately, and he's in here again, so let's see what happens. Oh, and Jacqueline has on, so she loves it too. That's fantastic. All right, so who did we get? Oh, and you're here it is the wizard. Congratulations, Ron. You are now the proud owner of a no Boring Books Book Launchers mug. So we will be getting that to you in the mail this week. So enjoy. Congratulations, and thank you for your comments on the videos. They're greatly, greatly appreciated. And, you know, for those of you who don't know, YouTube has mystery algorithms. But one of the things people are very conclusive on currently is that early Comments on the YouTube videos matter in the algorithm. It makes a big, big difference, which is why I want to reward everyone that stops by and comments after a video gets published, which is why we're doing these prizes. All right, so thank you, everyone. Next live is happening on June 26th. It'll be after our writers retreat. Oh, wait, wait. Something very important. I almost forgot. Tomorrow. Tomorrow I am going live on a zoom call, so if you haven't done one of these before, it's extra fun. But Jessica Rhodes, who is the founder of Interview Connections, very, very smart businesswoman and someone I've worked with to get me booked on podcasts. When I did my book the New Brand, you'd. I didn't want to schlep all over Canada doing a book tour because I was pregnant and I was also very sick, so I really didn't want to be book events while that was the case. And she has a company that books guests on podcasts and also books guests for your podcast, so she's really, really smart when it comes to a lot of things, but podcast booking and we thought we would team up and do a show writing a book that will be easier to pitch onto podcasts and getting yourself on podcasts to promote your book. So we're talking about that tomorrow at 4:00pm Pacific Standard Time. That's 7:00pm EAS. Jacqueline, just put the link right there for you inside of the comments here on Facebook. And if you're not seeing it or you're having any troubles with that, just send us an email and we'll send you all the proper invite, the calendar invite to join us tomorrow at 4:00pm Pacific, 7:00pm Eastern standard. And that's all about getting your book on podcasts and writing a book that will be easier to pitch for podcasts. So that's happening tomorrow, which is Wednesday, June. I'm terrible with dates. Oh, Today is the 12th, so it would be Wednesday, June 13th. So we'd love to have you all back on then. A little bit different format than this, but we'll be answering questions and having a conversation that you two that you can eavesdrop in on our conversation and ask your own questions as well. All right, so thank you so much for being here. It was an absolute pleasure, and I can't wait to see you here again in two weeks. Bye, everybody. Thanks, guys. It.