Sean Stephenson: Secrets of Becoming A Highly Paid Speaker
31 Oct 2014 · 85 min
Interview-style podcast (Bacon Wrapped Business) hosted by Brad Costanzo with guest Sean Stephenson. Sean—an experienced, world-renowned public speaker—explains how speaking can be a high-fee business and outlines his MDMA framework (Message, Delivery, Marketing, Attitude). The episode covers mindset shifts to remove fear of public speaking (focus on serving the audience, not yourself), storycrafting techniques (hooks, unresolved conflict → resolution), marketing/relationship tactics (advocate marketing), and an upcoming live event (Nov 13–16) for speakers. The tone mixes practical tactics, personal anecdotes, and lighthearted banter.
Questions this episode answers
November 13–16 (registration starts Nov 13; main days Nov 14–15; ends noon on Nov 16).
seanstevenson.com/10k
Message, Delivery, Marketing, Attitude.
1996.
About 21 years (spoken in the interview).
Chapters
Okay, this is Bacon Wrap Business with Shawn Stevenson, episode number awesome. For business owners, marketing execs, and anyone trying to grow your business, pump your profits and make more while doing less. Welcome to Bacon Wrapped Business with Brad Costanzo. Sizzling hot business advice guaranteed to make you fat profits. Hey, guys, this is Brad Costanzo. Welcome back to Bacon Wrapped Business. I've got a special video episode for you here today. I am interviewing my friend tour friendmentor, the Sean Stephenson who you can see on the screen if you're watching the video. If you're not, by the way, if you're listening to this on the audio only podcast, you can go to baconwrappedbusiness.com Sean Stevenson. I'll put a link on the show notes here so you can go check it out. If you want to watch the video on YouTube, et cetera, how to highly recommend it. But for all of those of you who are checking out the show right now live, I like to do these video interviews. I don't do them enough, but I think it's a great way for you to see the interaction between me and my guest. I called Sean a friend tour because he started off as my friend, he became my mentor. He's kind of back to my friend and go back to for mentoring whenever I need it.
I think I need to weigh in on whether that's even true, but keep going.
Yeah, he doesn't like to claim that.
He'S my friend, but it lowers my status.
I keep convincing him of all the benefits of being my friend and I said, I'll be your bff. Anyway, for those of you who don't know Shawn, for a lot of you, he needs no introduction. But for those of you who aren't familiar, Sean is a world renowned public speaker. He shared the stage with the Dalai Lama, with Richard Branson, with some of the top speakers, industry leaders, politicians in the world. He used to work in the White House under President Clinton. He's got one of the most impressive Rolodexes of content of contacts you'll ever meet. And he's also one of the most impressive people. Sean, you might want to put on earmuffs because I don't necessarily want your head to get any bigger than this.
Are you saying my head's big?
Yeah, a little bit.
My body.
Little big for your body?
I think I'm going to, I'm going to sue you for that.
Well, that's okay. I'll take that. That being said, let me continue to blow up ego. For those of you who are Fortunate enough not to know you. Sean is also one of the single best, if not the best public speaker that I've ever heard in my life. And I come across Sean just through some of his public appearances years ago. I was fortunate enough to meet him once more about maybe four or five years ago at another event and then another event. We just kind of kept in contact. And after several years of chatting back and forth, I actually hired Sean to help me with my. With my public speaking in his apprenticeship program. And I know Sean is, you know, you're probably very disappointed in me right now. You're probably thinking, man, you're making me look bad. You said once or twice.
No, I'm not wearing.
That being said, I'm really fortunate to have you on the show. This is kind of a funny show. You and I have been sitting here talking offline for, I think, about two hours now.
Just banter, something like that.
Yeah, back and forth, BSing and whatnot. Because we are friends. And I really wanted Sean to be on here for a couple of reasons. One of them is that, Sean, I believe that you have an incredible message to deliver. And folks who have any inclination to be a public speaker. Why am I.
Why is my angel just got its wings?
That's exactly what it is. Are going to be really excited to buy an event that you are hosting in just a couple of weeks. It's kind of last minute, but on November 13th through 15th, and we'll get into this. You're hoping through the 16th. 13th through the 16th, you're hosting a. An event for public speakers. And I mentioned this right now because if you're listening to this and you don't have the chance to go check it out, if you happen to jump off the line before we get to it, you'll be doing yourself a disservice. So we'll do the plug right away. Go to Sean stevenson.com 10k. Get all the information just to make sure that people aren't, you know, people don't miss this. But we'll get into that. That being said, Sean, welcome to the show. It's going to be fun to wrap you up in bacon.
And this is what I've been hoping you'd ask me to do for years. Give me all greasy.
All greasy. Enjoy me fry you up in a pan.
Damn.
Yep. So once more, we've been. We've been chatting for a while.
Are we supposed to be. I don't even know. Is this. Should we speak serious?
Serious is not as much fun as.
Okay, I like what you said there, B Essen.
So, okay, usually on the show, and I know you've probably listened to every single episode three or four times, transcribed them and, you know, read them.
Every morning I go to sleep listening to them. They put me to sleep.
But so, as you very well know, we like to share what we call bacon wrapped strategies, which is anything that is, you know, hot, sizzling, hot things people can't get elsewhere. Tasty, tasty, sizzling.
Get it out of your mind. Boom. Let me just say how brilliant your marketing strategy is on just this podcast. Just bacon itself is so powerful that I have met vegans up in Portland that have meetup groups to eat bacon. Vegans that eat bacon in Portland.com? yeah, something like that. But. But there are meetups of vegans that eat bacon and they're like, they just, they don't care. They know it's not vegan. They know it's not right. But damn it, they love their bacon.
You can't blame them. Yeah. I've had several people tell me they found my show and two of them, like, use the exact same verbatim words. When they emailed me and they said, you had me, I was scrolling through the itunes.
Had me at bacon.
You had me at bacon. Well, that's why I'm a marketing genius, because I figured I may not be able to dazzle them with my brilliance, but I'm going to bring them in with bacon.
We're gonna get into advocate marketing in here.
Yes.
Which is one of my claim defense. And we'll talk about that in depth in a moment. But have you sent bacon to your advocates?
No. However, I have. My assistant, Nancy has been researching some of the best gourmet bacon providers for gift, like, gift basket type bacon. And we are going to have a taste off. Like, we're going to get some and we're going to taste them. I think she may have the best job in the world because she's going to be paid to eat bacon.
Because what you need to do is when you have guests like me on, you need to send them bacon and you need to have bacon at the same time. We could just sit here, eat bacon and talk about business.
And that's going to be amazing because when people have their headphones in, they're going to hear us smacking our gums.
And.
If only they can get that smell. Yes. Yeah. By the way, do you. You. Have you heard my. Have you heard the jingle?
I think I have, yeah.
In the very, very beginning, it starts off with the sizzling Sound of bacon.
Yes.
So. But enough about.
And nothing is like, I. Can we talk about bacon for a moment?
We can talk about bacon.
Okay. I don't normally eat bacon, but when I do, I eat turkey bacon usually.
That's kind of sacrilege, by the way.
But go ahead, but hear me out because you'll. You'll understand when I go back to having a piece of regular bacon. After eating turkey bacon, I am like, what the hell have I been doing?
Yeah, there's a big difference.
Crappy turkey bacon. Like, turkey bacon is like taking turkey and like, just drying the hell out of it.
Right?
It's like making thin jerky. But when you have really good, good bacon and you cook it up right? Crispy, even vegans are like, looking. Getting people to look the other way so they can just shove it down their throat.
That's great. That's great. Well, I'm. Yes, it is on my. It is on my to do list for my advocates. And we'll talk about those guys in a second to. And also my guests to get a. Just a incredible slab of gourmet bacon in the mail because.
Right.
Everybody likes mail order bacon. So let's. Let's talk a little bit about squirrels.
I love squirrels.
I know, I know.
It is bacon.
No, I just like squirrels because I was thinking add. I was trying to switch the topic back to something that people are gonna get a lot out of. Although I like just BSing with you. But there's a lot that we could talk about and it kind of. It's kind of weird that, you know, we are friends. We talk about a little bit of everything.
We talk about things that we should not talk about on this program because my mom might listen, most likely.
And I saw. I saw Pop walking around.
Yeah, he's in town right now.
Eavesdropping.
Yeah, my dad knows pretty much everything. That's true. He went to college with me.
You're not gonna. You're not going to pull much. So does he have two degrees then?
No, because he didn't do a damn thing when I was in college.
He just sat back and he sat.
Back, ate in the cafeteria, read the newspaper. That's awesome. He was basically on a stakeout to make sure that his son didn't kill anyone or get any girl pregnant.
That's great. I love it. The. I love your dad, too. He's awesome. So he's your business partner, right?
Yeah. Yeah. That's awesome. Family business for, like, since 1996.
So the. And the family business, that is. I Mean, you are, you do a lot of things. But I mean, would you say that keynote speaking is really your.
My bacon bacon.
That's how you bring home the bacon.
So I'd bring home the bacon meat. Well, and we're transitioning out of that. Right. But it. For nearly two decades. Well, 21 years almost now, because I've been. 1996 was when I got my first paid speaking engagement, but I was speaking before then. So I say I've been speaking for 21 years, but I've been paid to speak for like 17 or something years. And, you know, it's hard to compete in my world with making 10, 15, $30,000 in an hour. You know, like, I, I see my buddies, they work their asses off for these launches, and after they pay their affiliates and after they pay for their advertising, you know, their Facebook ads, their Google Ads, and after they, after they. All their costs are done, you know, they may make 150 grand.
Right.
If there was a good launch. You know, that's.
It's the myth of the.
It's the myth of the launches for me.
Yeah.
And I don't have to kill myself. I go to Puerto Vallarta, Mexico, and I sip on a coconut and I get dressed, I go down the elevator, I get up on stage, I do my thing, I get a standing ovation, and I walk off network with the people that love me, and I go home first class.
Yeah.
And I'm not, I'm. I'm saying that partially to brag, but also partially to offer the. Just the vision to the listener that that's possible for people. You know, I, I gotta be honest, I'm a very lazy person. And so, you know, I used to fight that.
I, like, I've always thought that you probably, you know, can get up and walk around and you're just so lazy you like to sit in that chair.
No, what I did is I decided at a very young age that walking looked like a lot of work.
You're like, I'm just gonna sit here.
And tell I'm gonna develop a bone disorder. Right.
So here, fake it.
Here's why I decided to become a keynote speaker. I decided to be a keynote speaker because I wanted to be able to charge the maximum I could for one hour of my time, and then I have to work for months.
Yeah.
And you know, when, when you charge 10, 20, $30,000 for an hour, you don't need many engagements if you don't want to live like a rock star. You just want to live Nicely. You don't need many engagements a year at, you know, 20 to $30,000 a gig. And so my, my joke to my buddies are I want to finally figure out, you know, like, how can I get to the 150k for 1 hour, just do like 2 to 3 speeches a year and then just call it good.
Right.
Work three days a year and, and make more than I would if I busted my ass as an online marketer, you know, and so keynote speaking, what I loved about it is, and I still love about it is if you do it right, and we'll talk about the four aspects that it takes to master. I call it my MDMA formula. Wait, wait, wait. MDMA formula.
Nice. That sounds.
That sounds amazing. It is. It will take you to great places. Message delivery, marketing, and attitude. We'll go into that later. But when you really dial in on those four key components, you can charge almost anything you want if you, if you have those dialed in, you know, within reason. But, you know, I've seen people go from not ever being paid to speak to their first engagement being five to $10,000.
Right.
And that's a big leap that most businesses. You did your first launch. You, you, you don't. You have to have a big enough list to make a good amount of money. You, you can't go out, you know, with three names on your email list and book $10,000 worth of products, more than likely. But with speaking, if you have the right message, the right way of delivering it, the right marketing and positioning it, and you have the right attitude in working with the client and yourself. They, they. You know, like, I think you and you and I even talked about how. Remember the first time you saw me speak in San Diego?
Right.
What if I had gone up to you and said that was my third speech ever? Would you feel like you got cheated because you thought I was a pro?
No, I would have thought that you were superhuman, first of all, because if anybody could speak that well on their third speech, like, I'd be blown away.
Right. So people don't care how long you've been a speaker.
Right.
All they care about is the results you get when you're on stage. Yep. Speaking is unlike any other format. You get the right message, the right delivery, the right marketing, and the right attitude. You come out the gate making good money because people don't care how long you've been in it. It's not like in investment banking or many other fields. They're going to want to know how long you've been doing it because they're going to be worried about putting money into you. But if one YouTube video clip of you speaking blows people away, they go, just do that again. If you can do that again, we will happily pay you.
Yep.
And that's what's awesome about keynote speaking. And plus, I mean, what I have loved about my 21 years of doing this is I've traveled the world. You know, I've seen 47 states. I've seen probably going on 15 to 17 countries. I've been in every major US city in the United States. I've stayed in almost every five star resort on an island somewhere in this world that you can imagine. And I haven't had to spend a dollar to do that travel. You know, I got buddies. We have a friend you were talking about earlier. He Facebooks a lot. Right. He loves to travel, but he's shelling out thousands of dollars a year to travel. I don't get on an airplane unless somebody's paying for that.
Right.
And I'm so snobby that I don't get on the airplane unless they're paying for it. And they're also paying me.
Yeah. And first class.
And first class, so. Absolutely. And so that sounds arrogant. And. And it was. It didn't. I didn't start out that way, of course, but it got to the point in my career where I realized that vacation was getting to stay home.
You're right.
Vacation was not having to stay in a hotel. You know, people will try to call me up and they'll say, sean, we don't have a speaker's budget, but we're holding it in Atlantis and we're gonna fly you first class. And they're like, so that should be enough of an incentive. And I'm like, I've been to Atlantis three times this year. I. I don't need Atlantis to wet my appetite to go to a free speech, you know, And I, I hope that I'm not coming off, like, got it all figured out and I'm perfect because that's. I make a lot of mistakes. What I'm trying to get across is that this is a really fun industry to be in. You know, I've also had the pleasure of meeting some of the most amazing people.
Oh, yeah.
Doing what I do. I mean, I got to spend one on one time with the Dalai Lama. I got to spend one on one time with US presidents. I got to spend one on one time with some of the Fortune 500 company CEOs, Steve Forbes, Richard Branson. I mean, I got to learn in people's private homes, people that you could never access even with money, celebrities, athletes, musicians, all that I got to meet through speaking. And it's, I think of speaking, not just doing it live on stage, but this is speaking right now. You and I are speaking, right? So speaking is in podcasts, it's in webinars, it's in, it's in any format where your voice resonates out to an ear. And if you know how to speak in a way that people find it enjoyable to listen to and to learn from and to be entertained by, then you really have your speaker, your speaking, your message, your delivery, your marketing, your attitude dialed in. I love it.
And you know, the, the misconception. And I definitely think your message, especially with your mission right now, which is to help people become world class speakers, really needs to make sure that you don't confuse people to think that they, that the only benefit to what you teach them is to become a keynote speaker. But, but you just hit on it right there. Like speaking, it can be your entire business, but it can also be a critical component of any business, whether you're speaking to large stadiums or, you know, a thousand people in a corporate auditorium.
Most people that I, I am working with and I will work with probably will not address More than 500 people in live seminar in their life, right? Maybe even less than 100. Very few, very few will get to address thousands. And it's not because they aren't going to be good enough. It's because they, they will find that there are other avenues of speaking other than just traveling and doing live auditoriums that they're, you know, I did a webinar maybe about a year ago with a couple thousand people, and that was a small webinar compared to some of my friends, the old webinars. But on the webinar There was like 2500 people and I was in my pajamas, you know, and I was, but I was speaking and I created a little animation we just put out. Did you see the animation?
Which one?
From the Draw Shop?
Yeah, I did. Yeah, that was good. That was good.
Cool. And it was just another way in marketing, right? Just another way of telling what I'm telling right now, which is you can't just be a good speaker because that's just about delivery. And you can't just have a good story because that's just about message. You can't just have slick marketing because that's just marketing. You can't just be a nice guy because that's just attitude. You got to have all of it. Can't just be a nice lady. You have to have all four components. The M, the D, you know, mdma, all four components have to be firing all four cylinders.
Absolutely. And, you know, and you can. You can craft that. Everybody thinks you have to be a born public speaker and you have to be slick. And in a minute, I want you to go over something, I'll tee it up for you. Because it was one of the most impactful parts of our training together. I even heard you mention it on Joe Polish's podcast the other day. And I was like, ah, that's cool. He actually mentioned it. But so many people get petrified of public speaking, and they're so nervous and they think that I'm not good enough. People are going to laugh at me or I'm going to choke. And they're really, really worried because they're worried they're gonna look stupid. Right? And they get this fear. The butterflies turns into fear, turns into pet. You know, they become petrified. And it's. It's very natural, I think, for anybody to get those butterflies before they're about to go speak. And I know I do. I actually get a little bit excited before I get to go because I do enjoy it. Maybe I'm just an attention whore, I don't know. But you had. You shared a mind shift with me that has made 100% of the difference every time I speak, whether it's on a podcast like this, whether it's in a, you know, a room of small people or big people. And I want you to share that with right now.
Small people like me.
Small people like you. Yes, exactly like you. Because I speak to a lot of people who look exactly like you. It's like looking for Waldo.
I'm just another boring guy in your life.
Well, you blend into the crowd very easily. That said, do you. You know where I'm going with this? The mind shift that I'm thinking about the audience. Yeah. That if. If I recall right, and I'll let you. I'll tee it up, let you take it home. But look, if you are. I think I remember you saying, look, if you're. If you're nervous, if you're really nervous or fearful, you're being a selfish prick, you know, so go ahead and explain this concept because if. If you listening to this, get anything else, get. Take nothing else from this. This is. This is profound. But, you know, explain the mind shift that happens that removes the fear.
All fear of public speaking is really an issue of selfishness, that you're worried about what other people think of you. You're worried about if you look bad, you're worried about you're going to screw up, you're worried about will they like you. You're worried about whether they'll buy from you. You're worried about you, you, you, you, you. And when we get all tied up in thinking about ourselves, it creates drama, it creates fear, it creates paralysis. Whereas, because we're thinking about us, right? Whereas, what you have to realize is the audience isn't there for you. Even if even with big names like Tony Robbins, Les Brown, Wayne Dyer, you know, the giants of the speaking industry, as much as people think that they're calling to hear them, they're not. They're going to hear something that that person says that they idolize to then go use on themselves. And so I'm just trying to distill the truth, which is no one's ever listening because they love Sean Stevenson. They may even think that that's why they're listening, but they're not. They're listening because they love themselves. Hopefully. They want to figure out some aspect of life, they want to solve some problem they're going through. They want to create some kind of dream. They have something they want to work on, they want to gather some kind of stress relief technique, something they want to acquire from listening to my speech. And so I have to remember they're not there for Sean Stevenson. They're there for them, right? And so I don't have to worry about what they think of me because they're not thinking of me, they're thinking of them. And so that, that's a harsh reality of like, yo, you're not there because of you, you're there because of them. And when I get my best speeches, it's not when I'm even talking to them. Here's where it gets really funky. My best speeches, and I think any pro would tell you this, are when I'm actually talking to myself, right? Because that's the only time I listen up. If I'm talking to Brad Costenzo about bacon wrap business that is like sunshine up my ass. It's not real. If I'm like, whoa, dude. Okay, let's have a serious conversation for just a moment and let's talk about some of the hardships I've had in my speaking career. Let's talk about what I've had to go through, through. Let's talk about how I learned where I'm at and let's talk about some of the things that if I had learned them, I could have shortcut a lot of problems in my business. And now I'm talking to myself about my own authentic trials, tribulations, and talk about the things that I'm proud of. And when I'm talking and I'm using message points that relate to me still to this day, that's when I'm present, because I have to be. I'm absorbing as much as I'm. As much as I'm delivering. But if all you're doing is delivering and you have no interest in absorbing your own message because you don't think, you think as soon as you think you're above the crowd that your. Your mission is above other people, they feel it and you lose them.
Yeah. And that's so profound. And I just remember thinking, because if you, if you do care about what you're speaking about, and hopefully if you're speaking, you do, you give it right? So if you care and you. Your main goal should be. And this is the way that I interpret that too, and why it helps me, there's a. There's a room full of people out there who need the information that I've got. And if I am, like you said, if I'm. If I'm worried about the way I'm gonna look and if I'm gonna say or ah too many times, or if I'm not gonna give the best delivery, then I'm doing them a disservice. I'm robbing them from the content they need so much. And on the other side of that, I've seen speakers not deliver the best mechanics of it, but they are passionate about it. And you could tell they care, forgave them. Yeah. You forgive them because they care enough. Because you could tell they're putting the passion and in it and they are doing it.
Some of my best audience, some of my favorite speakers get up on stage with notes and they pace back and forth and they're goofy and they talk in tangents, but they are so authentic and their material is so like Joe Callahan. He's not a speaker that a lot of people know that are outside of the industry, but man, he gets all on stage. And I just, I'm enamored. Not because he's got the best delivery, he's got the best message, but he's so clear on who he is and he so cares about delivering the value to me, the listener that I think it's adorable he's holding his notes right it's not because he's not holding the notes, because he needs notes, because he doesn't know what he's gonna say. He's got notes so that he knows how to stay on track because he's got so much to say. So the notes are like playful.
Yep.
It's, it's not, it's not about, it's not about one single technique. It's not about one single thing. It's like back to the days of when you and I used to teach men how to get women and we would say to guys, it's not the pickup lines, it's the intention and energy underneath it. Because I could teach you the best line but if you're gonna be awkward and creepy about it, you, you'll creep the girl out. But you could also go up with smooth energy and totally sure of yourself and say anything and the girl will like you.
Yep, yep. It's all, it's all in that authentic delivery. And that's, you know, one of the things as I said, you know, I went through, I think it was a three month apprenticeship with you. And for some folks who think, oh, you're going to teach people exactly how to hold their hands and exactly how to be the most polished, it's really nothing about that. It's really about how to deliver that authentic message, but also how to craft the message in a way you gave some amazing techniques about. And we won't go into this right now. These are just the little antics but like the block method that you use about how you story block things in order to, if somebody's get, if you've got an hour and then they all of a sudden you went from an hour speech, they said you've got 15 minutes, how do you recover from that? And you've got really an amazing technique. What I really liked as well is it wasn't just about building the content and building the delivery, etc. But you talked about the marketing, you talked about the attitude, the business, the relationship side of it. I've studied a decent amount about public speaking, although not as much as know other topics. But I have not seen people really who know what they're talking about the same level you do. You've been doing this for a very long time. You've seen a little bit of everything when it comes to, you know, to speak.
And I've watched a lot of people fail.
Right.
And I don't mean fail like make mistakes because I made a lot of mistakes and I don't mean like have a bad Speech. Because I've had bad speeches. I mean, like, quit. I mean, like, not get hired and go broke.
Yeah.
I mean, like, you know, throw everything away because they didn't get it handled. So every year the National Speakers association has about a thousand people at least come to their national conference. They're all speakers. So you can. It's not the National Listeners Association. There's no one's. No one's listening.
Everybody's in there thinking about. This is how I would speak.
Everybody's talking over each other. And at least a third of the room, at least, Brad, a third of the room will not be back the next year.
Really? Because they just can't make it because.
They don't master mdma.
Yep. Yep. And then. And that's like you said, that's. That's message delivery, marketing and attitude.
Right? Yeah. And if I could for a moment, you will find and. And any of us will. Will find programs to really get good message. You'll find good programs about good delivery, find great programs about marketing. You'll find maybe some good programs about the attitude of how to handle the client. But the reason why I'm doing what I'm doing is I haven't found a boot camp, a sales program, like a. A training that teaches people all four aspects. And that's what always upset me. I would go to these trainings, and I'm not putting down these leaders. They. They taught me a lot, but they got really good at one of those four components. And then that's pretty much all they felt it took. You know, they would just be like, oh, oh, you just gotta market the hell out of yourself. And. Yeah, that's great. Market the hell out of yourself. Have good shiny brochures. And that's. That's going to get you a lot of first dates. But if you don't have a good message and you suck at delivery and you got a bad attitude to work with, you are not getting a second date.
Right.
And if you think you're going to make it in the industry of speaking without second dates, damn. You're going to choose to climb uphill every single day.
Yeah. And it's. It's those relationships that you build that keep paying dividends over and over. I'm sure there's multiple companies that you've spoken for.
They bring you back Zappos, Whole Foods. They are staples in my business.
Right.
You know, and so they bring you.
Back time and again.
Yeah. Several times a year.
Yeah.
You know, and. And if you get really good, you can just Call them up and say, I got something new that I. I know your team's gonna like. When can you book me? And they say, sure. What do we. You know, when do you want me to send you the money? And that's when you know you got it dialed in, is when you can call them up and say, are you ready to pay me again?
Yeah, that's it. And that's got to be a great feeling just to get to book a speech and just get paid for, I mean, an hour of your time, which is more than most people make in a. You know, in a month.
Yeah, well, it's very humbling because my sister works her butt off. She's a music teacher in elementary school, and I make. Like you said, I make more in an hour than she might make in a couple months, two to three months. And. And that's hard for her to handle sometimes.
Yeah.
But I'll tell you why. It's not because I'm better than her. What she does is she's way better as a teacher than I am. She's way better than with kids, than I've ever been. The only difference is there's a lot of demand. There's a lot of supply of teachers, and when there's a lot of supply, the demand and the. And the way that you're able to charge is not going to be there.
Right.
Whereas a speaker, there's. There's a lot of supply of speakers, maybe, but there's not a lot of supply of good speakers.
Yeah.
There's not a lot of supplier of speakers that master the mdma.
Yeah. Well, and I think the real reason that you get paid so much is simply, you know, because you're in a wheelchair and you look different than most people. And that's your advantage. That. I mean. That's right. That is the advantage that you have to have in order to be a speaker. You have to be a little different.
Right.
Isn't that what people. Is that what some people think?
That that's what a lot of people think. But since you read my sales copy closely, I know you're teeing me up for a good response.
Yes.
A nice rebuttal. Which is. That's what most people think. Yeah. And the issue is there's 56 million people in America with a disability. Do you know how many of them go on to be professional speakers that are successful?
Very few.
About a dozen.
Yeah. You shared. I remember the first time you shared a story. It was at Awesomeness Fest several years ago when we first really kind of connected. And I love this. And I've heard you talk about it on stage a couple times, and it's one of my favorite stories. I'll let you recount it here. But I think you were saying that you went out back in Chicago with some. Some friends of yours, and you went to a nightclub.
Yeah.
And you know where I'm going with this.
Yeah. Oh, yeah.
Go ahead and finish the story, because I think this alone illustrates just not only this point, but a lot of points when it comes to the attitude part of things.
So a buddy of mine, when I would go out in my single days, now I'm happily married and nightclubs annoy me, actually. But back in the day, they were like.
Because nobody can dance like you.
Well, that is true.
I mean, you need competition.
Well, when I dance now, I demand at least a million people to watch. Sometimes four, sometimes one night. Yes. But only in the first week. That's true. And I, like, take the video down. But what I had happening back when I was young and single, younger and single, is I would go out and I would get a whole group of women around me dancing. And my buddy got really jealous, and he was like, I don't understand why all these women give you their attention. It's probably because you're in a wheelchair. And it's the same excuse people use. Oh, that's why. That's why you're. You've built a business the way you have because you look different. It's because of your wheelchair. Okay. All right. So I tell my buddy, I'm gonna go out tonight. When we go dancing, I'm not gonna act like Sean. I'm gonna act like a three foot tall man in a wheelchair. And so I actually had to stop and ask myself, how does a three foot tall man in a wheelchair think? Because I don't think that way. I think like Sean Stevenson, a guy. Like, I have the reverse problem of most people with eating disorders. I don't see myself worse off than I am. I see myself better than I am. Yeah, but you're like.
You're like the little dog who thinks he's a rottweiler. Right?
Right. Yeah, I'm straight. I mean, Chihuahuas rule the roost, man. I don't know if you've ever noticed, but you don't mess with a chihuahuas. So anyway, we go out. I acted all shy, sheepish, afraid of my own shadow. No girls wanted to dance with me. No girls wanted to look at me. They walked around me like furniture. My buddy comes running over he's like, sean, Sean, I get it, I get it. It's because of you and your energy and your attitude. You bring the party. It's through who you are as your energy behind it all. Now can you please bring the girls back? And. And, you know, it was in that moment that he realized, I'm just making an excuse for why I'm not coming out of my show, to be as confident as Sean's acting, because confidence is what's attractive on stage, in a nightclub, anywhere. I believe that when, you know people, people will always throw at me the excuse of why I have what I have because of my disability. I've had people, literally, I had publishers, a big name book publishing, say to me, well, we think the only reason why you got to work in the White House is because you were in a wheelchair. And they needed somebody in a wheelchair to look good. And I'm like, they have thousands of applicants a year. They take a small number of applicants, and they rarely pick somebody with a disability. You think it's because of the disability? No, it's because I worked my ass off first. I became a congressional intern and I worked for a congressman, and I got great remarks from my congressman. It's because I worked going door to door as an alderman in my ward and understanding politics on the local level. And then I understand it, in my poli sci degree, I got incredible marks from my professors. And then because I got a personal letter from the president who had worked with me in another organization and said, you know, to the. To the committee, like, yes, Sean is somebody who would be perfect to work in our administration. Like, I busted my ass for that position.
Yeah.
But no different than race or gender or sexuality. If somebody wants to point a finger and say, the only reason why this person has this is because you're not going to argue with them, because now.
They'Re making excuses for their own.
Don't get it. No explanation will do. For those that get it, no explanation is needed. Right.
And when they. And when they can come up with an excuse like that, it. It frees them. Yeah. It frees them from having to. To. To take the next step and to work on themselves, because they just go, oh, well, that's a barrier I can't get over. I got. I got two.
This is why people still this day hate on me and my wife from our marriage.
Yeah.
You know, like, they'll come out and they'll be like, the only reason why she's with him is because he's rich and she's like, wow, how dumb two things. How dumb do you think I am that there's a lot of rich guys out there? Why would I pick a little dude in a wheelchair? You know, I can pinpoint that guy when I could have taken a much easier road.
And your wife's beautiful. That's not like.
Right? I mean, and it's insulting me because it's like saying there's no other reason why somebody would want to be with me.
Right.
And it's like, wow, thanks for totally not acknowledging that I'm a human being that has charisma, confidence, a focus, a purpose, a mission. All things that women find attractive. But as soon as they can shoot down the reason that they think that, you know, is the magic behind the curtain. I responded to somebody, and this is off topic for a second, but I wrote somebody on Mindy's blog. My wife's name is Mindy Knis. And on Mindy's blog, she was like, tearing into Mindy. You know, there's no reason why you're really with him other than for the visibility and the money and blah, blah. And I wrote her, and I'm like, what are you trying to accomplish here? Are you trying to play TMZ and like, and like, overturn the truth about what's going on here? Can I tell you, you know, most of our days we work as entrepreneurs, we spend in our pajamas. We watch Shark Tank together, we read our Kindles in bed until, you know, 2:00am we have cereal at about 2:30 in the morning. You know, we curl up, we have wonderful sex life, we absolutely have each other's back, and there's no one else in the world that we care more about than each other. That's the truth. If you're going to try to find something else, you're wasting your breath, your time, and you just look stupid.
Right, right. It's, you know, the, the haters out there, it's. And I, And I know you've talked about this before. I mean, you know, used to take it personal, and now it's. You take sympathy on them and.
Well, I know that, that the hurt hurt and the healed heal.
Yeah.
You know, and it's like, when people are hurt, the way that they deal with it oftentimes is they go with the knee jerk reaction, which is, I'm in pain. I want you to be in pain.
Yeah. Misery loves company.
Well, yeah. Misery loves to see somebody else in more misery.
Yeah. Because it makes. Yeah, exactly. It alleviates them.
Why do you think people watch Jerry Springer?
Yeah, exactly.
At least I'm not that fucked up.
Exactly. You know, and that's. And that's important for people to really understand is that it's not. It's not who you are or. I'm sorry, it's not what you look like. It's not the things that have happened to you that made you a successful speaker and somebody who can engage an audience and grab them by their earballs and just not let go. It's the craft that you've perfected. It's the message. It's the passion in your voice. It's what you deliver. And the fact is, there are thousands of highly successful speakers in perfectly average, normal bodies that, you know, prove. Yeah, it's not. It's not anything special about physical. It's all what's inside, and that's what you deliver better than most people I know.
I believe it's our story.
It's your story, Brad.
If we took time on this podcast, and even a white guy like yourself who grew up without any major battles, you know, in comparison to, say, somebody who grew up in slavery or whatever, we can.
My parents were pretty strict, though. I don't know.
Right. Yeah. Your dad was tough. Right. But if we looked into your past, we would find things that people would be like, wow, I. I don't think I would want that problem.
Yeah.
I don't.
Everybody has it.
I don't think I want to go through that heartache. Yeah. Like, let me ask you. Can we get. We get real for a moment?
Let's do it.
Okay. What is one thing about you, one pain or challenge that you faced in your lifetime that no one would ever guess you had to go through?
Wow. So that's a good question, and I'll say that.
Tell us the one that you think we want to hear. Tell us the truth.
Right. You sob pulling me, putting the spotlight on me on my own show. So I'll be the first to say that I did. I did have a happy. I've had a happy life. I've had a happy childhood. That's not right. Exactly.
So I will just answer the question.
Yeah. So I'll say that I haven't had any dramatic pain.
I didn't ask that.
That I've had to overcome.
No, no, I didn't ask that.
Yeah.
What is the one thing that was difficult and challenging that no one would ever expect you had to go through?
So. And I. And I kind of want to. So I don't have dead air, because this is a show, people are going to think, oh, Wait, the recording stopped. What is something I went through that was extremely challenging and painful that no.
One would ever guess you went through? Maybe a better way to say it. Yeah, you cough it up because it's in there.
It is in there.
Yeah. A better way of asking it is, what would you not wish on people that you love that you went through?
That's. That's a good question. I like, you're good at this therapy stuff.
You're.
Now, you're not only a speaker, you're. You're a doctor at this stuff. So I would say that the hardest. God, I'm not being. I'm not being a good subject here.
Because, you know, you're having a brain fart. You're just feeling like it's not dark enough and you're not.
That might be, but it's also not coming straight to my head.
Okay, so.
And I may have to think about this and we'll come back to it.
But I don't such a put off.
But I don't want to sit here.
And mumble around, wrap this in bacon, we're done, you know?
Well, and I'll say this, and it might be because I don't have any of those.
I think it's because you're undervaluing your pain.
That's possible. It's possible. And I think I don't have any super.
Let's go kindergarten.
Well, I was about to give you kind of an answer.
Yeah, I don't want kind of an answer.
Well, the answer I was gonna give you is this. I have. I'm actually very good, like maybe you said, dumbing down the pain. I'm actually very good at moving away from the pain and putting it in perspective and looking at something and saying, I'm just going to continue on.
Well, the hard part about that is that doesn't make a good speech.
Right. And this was the hardest part, honestly, about my apprenticeship training with you and God, to me, I would think, oh, yeah, poor baby lived a charmed life. He can't think of any dramatic pains that he's had. But this, honestly, was the. I know, but this was the hardest part about coming up with my story.
That's because you're comparing it to mine and others.
Right.
So.
So, you know, the hardest thing that I probably dealt with.
I'm going to kindergarten on you right now.
Cool.
You're a kindergarten kid. This is how I would talk to a kindergartner. What hurts for you to go through.
So the most painful thing that I've probably Gone through was when I was in. I graduated college and I decided to leave home and I moved away to Florida. I left St. Louis, where I grew up. I moved to Florida and I actually worked for Walt Disney World for minimum wage right after college, college degree and everything. And I felt as though I was just kind of breaking away and doing something like taking charge of my own life and having some fun, et cetera. And my dad was completely non supportive, to say the least. It caused a big rift in between us. And the hardest part about that was that he and I had a good relationship. And then all of a sudden I had always thought of myself as, you know, a good kid who did. Right. I never got in too much trouble, you know, the ordinary stuff. And then all of a sudden it was almost like I had just let him down more than, you know, like I couldn't believe it. It kind of blindsided jail or something. Right. It blindsided me in the lack of belief and the lack of support in what I was doing. Now granted, everything I was doing kind of didn't fly according to his paradigm of the world and, and whatnot. And I get it. I put myself in his shoes and. And actually maybe one of the reasons that a lot of this stuff doesn't hurt as much as I went through several years of neuro linguistic programming training and I've dealt with all of my issues to a degree where I'm able to see the positive intent that he had for me, trying to protect me, trying to make sure that I didn't mess up and doing it in the only way he knew how, which was to show his disappointment and say, I can't be a part of this. I can't support what you're doing. Yep.
You realize more people go through that than breaking 200 bones like me.
That's true.
So when people tell me the that, oh, my story is not as compelling as yours. It's only the way you're looking at it.
And mine's more relatable, you're more relatable.
So I have to turn it in a different direction. I have to say, essentially without saying it directly, but I went through this, this, this and this. But I did this, this and this and this after I got through that.
Right.
So mine is I was here, now I'm here. Where can you go? That's kind of been my thing. Right, right. For you, it's the format of you and I, we have a lot more in common than you might think. And you have to take the approach of, you know, I'm not. I'm not going to say that I was in. I survived an airplane crash. I'm not going to say. Say I'm a survivor of sexual assault. I'm not going to say that, you know, I saved 10 kids from a burning building. I'm going to say I'm a kid that grew up with great parents.
That one day the support was revoked.
That one day that he didn't feel like he had. He had a good connection anymore with his parents. It felt like he lost a big part of his identity. And how many people in here have ever had a separation in some ways where they didn't feel supported by their family? Hands are up.
Yeah, that's a good point. And you.
When I'm. When I'm working with my coaching clients that are speakers, I don't look at how can I make you little me's. You and I talked about this just today in our banter.
Yeah.
What drives us nuts are gurus that make carbon copies of themselves. God, I hate that.
Yeah.
It sickens me because I know what's going to happen. Only the guru gets rich.
Yep.
The carbon copies look like idiots.
Yeah. That's true. And I do want to, because my father may very well be watching this, but I do want to say that the. The relationship.
So the boy does not love you.
The. The relationship was strained for a couple years, and I took it really hard. And it was a time where I had moved away. I was on my own. No family down there, just some friends. And the support would have meant the world to me because it meant he believed in me. But then we, you know, I made some other changes. I moved away. We repaired that.
My father, well, it made me stronger by.
It made me a lot stronger. It also made me realize that, okay, listen, if he's not going to believe in me for what I'm doing right now, that just means I have to believe in myself even more. I have to strengthen that resolve and prove that, listen, I'm not making a mistake. I'm betting on me. And I'm going to take all that strength and push forward. And it worked. And my dad and I repaired our relationship wonderfully, where he's my best friend and we get along unbelievably well. And I quickly forgave the. We even joke about it now, but I forgave that because I think it's really important for people to realize that when people do that, there is that positive intent. He wasn't trying to be mean. He wasn't trying to be that he was concerned. It was his only way of demonstrating that was to kind of shut off. And I think that's important for everybody to realize. And I see where you're going here. We did talk about this, now that I remember about it a year ago during our training. But yeah, it's. Sometimes I feel bad that that's the, maybe the most traumatic, emotionally traumatic thing I've went through. I've had ups and downs, I've lost a bunch of money and I've.
See, but that's the thing. The things that were hard on you. No, let me put this way. The things that you got through, they were, they weren't easy. Yeah, but you got through them. Other people would have crushed other people.
Right.
And you downplay them. You know, you've told me that like you came out, you were doing something, you, you made a bunch of money and then you invested it and it all disappeared.
Yeah.
That, that might have crushed majority of people that ever want to keep going in business. And you're just like, I mean, I didn't come out of slavery.
Yeah.
Most people don't come out of slavery that are going to be in your audience. Most people are gonna lose a lot of money though.
Yeah. Or support.
There are more people that will make bad investments that will then will survive a rare bone disorder that keeps them three feet tall and in a wheelchair.
Right.
Most people will deal with a severing in their relationship with their parents, then will ever deal with some form of massive obstacle that only a small percentage of the population ever has to face. So when I'm working with somebody who wants to be a speaker, I don't say, how can we find the most traumatic thing and make it even more traumatic? No, I say, tell me about your life.
Yeah.
Because I would play up the strength that you sometimes feel bad that you have first world problems. Right. Sometimes that makes you feel bad that you even feel bad. I mean, sometimes. Have you ever felt bad for feeling bad?
Yeah, yeah, yeah. All the time.
Like a spoiled little brat. Like, wow, here I am in this gorgeous place that I live in, San Diego, California, with a beautiful girlfriend. And like I got all these great friends and I'm bitching because something's wrong with my shopping cart system for my launch. Right?
Yeah. You're talking. Yeah, I think I went through, I think I went through that last week.
Okay.
But no, exactly like that. And it does make it hard to almost experience that emotion because you, you, you tell yourself, oh, you're, you're bad for experiencing that emotion, and you bottle it up, and then.
Well, that's where I come in.
Right.
That's where I tell people the resistance of an emotion is far more detrimental than any emotion.
Right.
And that's why. The reason why I kept forcing you on your own show to tell me about some of the challenges you've had or a challenge that you faced, is that I know that it's hard for you to. To admit to yourself that you've had pain.
Yeah.
Because you're comparing it to other people's pain, and you feel guilty that you even acknowledge your own pain. But look, this is why when I see somebody breaks their finger, I, like, reach out to them. I'm like, oh, my God, what happened? Tell me about it. You know, I might tease them, like, ooh, tough guy broke his finger, you know? But in the end, that one broken bone, if that's all he's ever broken, is everything to them as the 200 I've broken.
Right.
And. And that's what brings me close to the human race, is that I don't try to say that my pain is supposed to superior to your pain. And I'm thankful that I got that at an early age, that a paper cut, if it's all you've ever experienced, is as painful as having a severed arm, if that's all you've ever experienced. Because the brain doesn't have the ability to fathom, Even though we have mirror neurons and empathy and all that, we can't fully embody what someone else is going through.
You're right. You're right. And, you know, kind of steering this back towards what I think was amazing to watch you do with the small group of, like, five or six of us who apprenticed with you. What is what you just did to me and you, I watched you do this with everybody's story because everybody thinks, you know, that we've got this kind of. Kind of a story, and it's maybe malformed or it's not quite there. It's just this gelatinous hump, and you're really able to pull that out and show it back to us like a mirror and say, this is how you craft your experience, even if it was one experience like that, into a dramatic opening, into a hook, into something that's going to grab somebody. Make them relate to you for your speech, make them listen to every single word you got, and then craft your message based upon those experiences.
In this moment, I'd like to do one more thing.
Yes.
I'd like to craft a Bit of your story.
Do it.
I'm going to play the part of Brad Costanza.
Sweet.
I'm going to be making up some of the details because I wasn't there. That's cool. But you could fill in the truth to some of my fabrication, but I'm going to try to make it as realistic as possible. Nice. I'm a keynoter. I'm Brad Costanzo. I'm standing on stage, I'm thinking about. The audience is there for them, not me. And I open with a line, dad, why can't you just be proud of me? And I pause, I pace, and I make the audience wait. What do I need to do to get this man to be proud of me? I mean, I never. I never broke the law. I mean, yeah, sure, I. You know, I might have had a little pot, but I mean, what kid doesn't do a little pot? Dad, it's not like I didn't make the honor roll. I've always made the honor roll. Dad. All I want from you more than anything you, is to know that I have what it takes. And it doesn't matter what happens, you have my back. Why is that so hard for you? If I could just have that, dad, that'd be worth more money than I could ever make. Look at the audience. Who's been that person in your life? Who is that one person that you are starving for or starved in your past for their approval and their admiration? I'm here to tell you that you can't get it. You can't seek it externally. It's not their job to approve of your life. It's your job to approve of what you do in your life. And if you get it from your parents, you get it from your lover, if you get it from your friends, that's wonderful. That's awesome. But if you don't give it to yourself, you're going to be like an addict searching around for the next person to get your next hit of admiration scene. And that's them. There you go. Right? And equaling bread. Right?
Dude, I should be paying you for this. Wait a minute. I did pay you a lot of.
Money for this continuation of your payment. So it's. It's taking a story now. Everybody in the audience would have been. I mean, you were listening to your own audience. You were listening to your own life and enamored.
Yeah.
I watched you like you sat back and watched your own life unfold on stage.
Yeah.
And that's because I walked you through a system. I started off telling you a Story. I said, dad, what can I do to just get your approval? Now I'm thinking, how old is he? Where is he at? I'm, I'm starving for more details of the story, right? You have me hooked. You started in the middle of the story. You didn't say, welcome, everybody. My name is Brad Costanzo, and I'd like to tell you a story about a time that when I graduated college, you know, I just didn't get my father's approval. Boring. I'm dead. I'm out. I'm already brain dead to you.
Yep. Audience is checking their Facebook on their phone.
Whereas when you say, dad, dad, what do I have to do to get you to be proud of me? It's all I want. Now. Everybody in the audience has suspended disbelief. And they're like, ah, I want my mom's approval. I wanted my grandfather's. I wanted my uncle. I wanted my wrestling coach. Everybody has at least one person in their life, in their present or their past, that they feel like, God, they didn't love me the way I wanted to be loved. That's how you jack into their mind. That's how you jack into their soul. That's how you stream direct consciousness to them of your message. It's not. Good afternoon, everybody. I'm gonna tell you three stories today. One is gonna be a very personal one about my father. Then we're gonna talk about a business failure. We're gonna finish up and talk to you about something I learned from working at Walt Disney World. Is everybody ready? Here we go. I'm now going to do a magic trick, you know, like, good God. And that's how most people speak. Yeah, Most people get up on stage and they say, I'd like to apologize. I'm not that prepared.
Oh, yeah, never apologize.
Never apologize. Because what would you do if you got an airplane in the pilot said, good afternoon, everybody. I, I gotta say I'm sorry. I'm sorry that I am really tired today.
I really hung over.
Didn't get much sleep last night. I was hooking up with this hooker and I'm hoping that the coke has gotten out of my system by now. And buckle up. We're going to be flying at an altitude of 30,000ft like you would be racing for the exit. Right? And that's what speakers do. They get up on stage and they at least amateurs, they apologize for being nervous, for being not prepared for whatever. And they'll even try to, they'll try to think. They think they're being funny by cracking jokes. About how uncomfortable. How uncomfortable they are. They just make it worse.
Yep. Yeah, you're so right. There's so many things that people shouldn't do. There's so many things that just. They. They can ruin. Like, oh, guys, I'm not a. I'm not a good public speaker. You know, they. They start off saying that, or they apologize ahead of time. They. They make some of the most boneheaded mistakes just by removing some of those that, you know, we went through.
And what made that story compelling.
Yeah.
Is I turned the camera from me to the audience and I said, who in your life, right. Are you starving for admiration and attention? You know? And then all of a sudden, everybody's like, God, that's my uncle, my grandfather, my mother. And now the audience, they were already thinking it, but now you've given them permission to say it internally.
Right. And to take this even deeper, you didn't resolve the conflict.
No.
Well, I'm sure you would have resolved that around the end of this speech, maybe. Right. Or just leave them hanging.
The resolution could be in a book.
Right.
Solution could be in a program. Here's the issue. I don't believe in cutting people open, having them bleed to death and be like, hey, I got band Aids in my truck for 1995. I don't believe in that. I do believe, though, and saying, hey, like, dude, you gotta admit you're in pain. And I'm gonna. Because most people try to act like they're not in pain.
Yeah.
Most people act like they have it all together. We were just talking about this today, weren't we? Most people act like they have it all together. And those people are the most annoying shitheads on the planet to me, because I know they're full of it. I know that they are in so much pain that they're trying to put on a Persona. Look, I'm the first person to say I got issues in my health, my wealth and relationships, and yet I figured out a lot of things. And then there's other things that I figured out, but I'm still not doing right. And so that level of authenticity is what people are craving. People are creating authenticity and leadership more than information and credibility.
Yeah, I couldn't. I couldn't agree more. It's. And it's so. It's so rare out there because there is so much inauthenticity and there's so much noise in the system that when they feel. And, you know, with social media, we're more connected, but we're less connected than ever before. So when you do, when you are able to make those emotional connections, and that's one of the strongest part about your speech, is you are able to tap into people's emotions and make them feel the ups and the downs on a roller coaster. So the original name of your program was Standing Ovation Secrets. And Standing Ovations is not about standing ovation system. Right. And it's not about, in my mind and probably yours, that it's not about. People are giving you a standing ovation because of how awesome you were. They're giving you a stand of innovation because of the ride you took them on the journey.
The system I took them, that was a system that I went through as a speaker.
Right.
And I am guaranteed if people followed my system of the MDMA formula, they. They handled, then there's little subsets of Mark, little subsets of messaging, little subsets of delivery, subsets of marketing, subsets that to. But when you implement them, you could take that Brad Costanzo white guy with first world problems, get him up on stage, have people crying, have people thinking, oh, man, I just need to stop trying to get my father's approval. I need to go out and feel good about myself. And they march out there going, wow, that Brad Costanzo guy is one of the best speakers alive. Why? Not because you were an amazing speaker, even though hopefully you weren't, but because you had them. Here's what I think public speaking is. I came up with this after SOS Public speaking is a transference of ideas and a shifting of emotion.
I like that.
That's all public speaking is. You transfer ideas and you shift emotions.
I think that, yeah, that's what effective public speaking is. There's a lot of public speaking. That's what public speaking.
The rest is talking.
Right?
Effective public speaking is where it's. Because you gotta have both. Because if you just shift emotions, people go out going, wow, that was, that was great. But what did we learn? I don't think we learned anything. And then if you just share good information, but you don't shift emotions, people go, wow, I learned a lot. But that was really dry.
Yeah, yeah, that's. It's profound when you, when you make those changes. And as I said, I've. I've made those in small groups. I've used quite a few of your tactics and strategies as well as the, you know, that the deeper work that you've done, and I need to continue to do that deeper work. And that's one of the reasons I'm coming back to the. To the speaking event. Yeah, that you've got. Let's talk a little bit about that. Because, you know, we started off saying that, listen, one of the things you're doing right now is you're transitioning your life and your business.
Being on the road is a prince to a king.
Exactly. And being on the road is hard for you. Right. For a lot of physical reasons. You can't do 40 cities in a year. I mean it wears. Yeah, exactly. It wears you out. And you'd much rather be at home with your beautiful wife and, and serving people in a way that's much more efficient, effective. And you've transitioned to now. Yeah, being the, going from the Jedi to the Master, teaching other people, transferring these skill sets to them. Like you started with a small group of us and now you're putting on what is looking to be a remarkable event. You've got some of the most world class entrepreneurs, public speakers, just a really diverse group of people coming out. What's the real. And once more the website, if you want to go check this out. If you want some information, there's going to be a link on there, but it's Sean stevenson.com 10k. What's your real goal and mission for this event?
To make the maximum amount of money.
No, make money.
I mean, that's one of my goals. Yeah. And I'd rather just be transparent about that, is to make the maximum amount of money, but in exchange for creating world leaders.
Yeah. This is not about you. We were talking about this. You're not trying to make people good public.
No, because if I make good speakers, they'll go out, they'll do one or two speeches, they'll make some money, they'll more than, you know, 10x their value from coming to the event. But that's not what inspires me. I don't want more public speakers in this planet. What I want is I want people that become world leaders. And I don't mean like political leaders per se, but I mean they have a mission, they have a message. They've solved a problem in their life that could help many people out there who don't have this. For instance, I met, I met a speaker once who, when she was 31, she was married for a few years and her husband died and she was 31 and she was a widow and she was like, wow, this is supposed to happen when I'm 60, 70, 80, 90 years old. Like I'm 31. What do I do now? I have this scarlet letter of being a widow. Like I didn't end my relationship. I love this man. Am I ever gonna find a man again? And she couldn't find any support system on grieving that made sense to her.
Right. It was all geared towards a totally different situation.
And yet there are people whose husbands are killed in Iraq or wives are killed in battle or, or somebody dies of cancer or, you know, something happens and they lose their partner. And so she created a grief program for a demographic that wasn't being spoken to. And she is a happy, chipper, bright person. She still misses her husband today, but I think she's remarried with kids. And, you know, like, she built her whole career around one of the most painful moments of her life. You know, I've met people who were tortured as war criminals. I've met people that were tortured in child abuse cases. I met people who, you know, have gone through horrific things. I met people who lost everything financially, who lost everything in their life to natural disaster. I mean, difficult challenges. That said, that's it. I have a story here. I have a message here. And then I met people who just had a passion for accounting. They had, they didn't survive in the airplane crash. They, they didn't have a, you know, a third arm coming out of their back. Like, there was nothing unique about them physically, but they were so passionate about accounting. They knew that there was ways that people could legally save more money and keep more money in their family that was rightfully theirs. And, man, they were passionate about that. And you couldn't shut them up about it. And so they became incredible accounting speakers and they saved companies and individuals a lot of money. And that was their, that was their mission.
Yeah. And it doesn't have to be, it doesn't have to be all super emotional.
It doesn't have to be motivational. Yeah, I got a lot of lawyers and doctors. I have a lot of people coming to this event who may never do a single keynote presentation in their life, but they know that they have to get good at presenting.
Right.
Everybody at some point in their life has to make a presentation, whether it's a webinar, whether it's a small group of 10 people, whether that's investors, whether they have to make a pitch, whether they have any time. You have to transfer an idea and shift in emotion. You need to be good at speaking.
Yeah, yeah. That's amazing. So you're going to, you're going to bring people into it. It's a three day workshop, right? Three or four.
It's two and a half, two starts on the 13th. Registration and then 14, 15 all day and it's over on noon on the 16th.
Nice. So we. Because I'm going to be there.
Yeah.
We are going to be listening to you break down your system, I'm sure. I'm quite positive. We're going to be doing some activities and work to bring out our own stories. I have a feeling it's not going to be a completely complacent.
Sit back and take one way relationship.
One way relationship. I know you too good too well for that. We are going. You've got some guest speakers lined up as well, right?
Yeah, yeah, some of the best. You know I've got. My wife, Mindy Kness is an incredible speaker. You saw her class in this fest and she was also in my apprenticeship program.
How much did she have to pay to get on that stage?
Yeah, let me tell you, it was. It was a hefty fee. Fee. She'd probably end up paying a lot more than you did.
That's probably. Yeah, she can't get away.
So anyway, she's gonna be talking about stage presence. She has an incredible stage presence.
Yeah, she does.
Gonna be talking about that. We have Jay Abraham, one of the best marketers alive.
Yep.
Talk about positioning. We got Joe Polish, one of the best networkers alive. Dean Graziosi, one of the best sales people alive. Larry Wingett, one of the best speakers alive.
Seiko Andrews.
Seiko Andrews, one of the best poets alive. Talking about using the spoken word. Kyle Cease, one of the best mediums.
One of the funniest motivational.
Have you met him?
Yeah, I met him at a couple times. I can't remember where maybe Osman is. Fest or something like that.
So it's, it's who I consider my mentors.
Right.
I have reached out to over the years and I wanted to gather them in one room for everybody to have access to because I could talk to you for days. But why not learn from my mentors and me at the same time?
Right now I'm so looking forward to it. Just not only the, you know, the content, which will be a great refresher for me. I kind of feel like I'm at an advantage because for me it'll be a refresher. Although I know you're adding a lot.
More stuff that actually everybody that goes through this program.
Yep.
Gets the program that you went through.
Oh, nice.
Granted, they weren't there for the live. Live training. Yep. So they didn't get to ask questions and all that. But they get the recordings of everything that you went through.
Yeah. And spend a heck of a lot less.
Invest. Yeah. I mean, four grand. Yeah, we're paying 1497.
Yeah. Yeah, that's. That's cheap. And they get the benefit of not only interacting with other speakers, your mentors, some of the top people in the business, but this business is where, you know, it's. Relationships are made. You know, we're not. I don't want to dive in too much into the advocate marketing tactics or strategy that you have on here, because I want to save that for the people who get their butts to your. To your event. Plus, I kind of want to keep that one in my pocket because it is so freaking powerful.
You know, they.
They say it's who you know, but I think, I think it's the relationships you grow.
Yeah.
And I've never. Yeah. And it's. I've never seen such a powerful tactic. Call it a tactic, Strat, because it's a, It's a strategy. It's a long game for, for growing. I don't even say relationships for growing rock solid bonds that can help advocates that. It's a strategy that you employ that absolutely anybody can duplicate. It is not rocket science. It is very easy to do and it is one of the most effective.
And I learned it in a book for like five bucks. Right?
It's worth thousands. It is worth thousands, guys.
I'm telling you. Hundreds of thousands to me every year.
Hopefully this part is on the recording of the folks who do get the, the course that I went through. Right. All the, all the recordings. So I remember when you did that, one of the first things I said.
Is, I said that was worth the price.
I said right there.
Boom.
Yep, four grand.
That paid my four grand.
I would have paid for that idea alone and I would not have come up with it myself. I'm a very good network. I've asked a couple people, what am I known for? And you know, what do you think I'm good at? And everybody says you're a really good connector. You seem to make relationships with a lot of people, and I am good at that. And that being said, I've never seen anything this just so good. Yeah, you really did. And it shows because, I mean, you got the guns.
Boom.
To prove it. But so I want to. I want to save that. I was going to talk about it, but I want to save that for folks who.
Maybe, just maybe someday we'll talk about it on Bacon Rap Business.
We might. We might make that a black label show.
Yeah, maybe we'll charge for that. Yes.
I'm actually let my listeners know right now. I'm going to have a. I'm going to call it Black Label Bacon or something like that. That's going to be my private, like, extra crispy, Extra crispy Black Label gourmet bacon list. Where Canadian bacon.
Nah.
So, yeah, one of the things I very soon am going to be doing is, is something like this where I'm going to say, all right, Sean, we're going to save this one for the Black Label subscribers, the extra crispy subscribers, and we're going to put that in a little membership area soon. I'll be charging for this because I think it's too good not to. I am a marketer. This is part of my business. I got to practice what I preach. But I'll tell you what, anybody who gets on my newsletter list, if you're listening and a subscriber to the show, that's great. Or go to baconratbusiness.com or send an email to ask bradakenratbusiness and you'll kind of get grandfathered in to the Black Label. You're hearing it here first. But I really hope that people listening to this show. This is by far the longest show I've done. But I love talking to you.
I just edit out all the part where you were being a little bitch and didn't respond to my question. That's like at least 30 minutes.
Yeah, it probably was a little bit of mumbling and dead air, but it is.
No. I don't even know what to say. Come back.
But. And it was funny. As I said, we. We've been talking even before we hit record. We've been talking literally for three hours. Like you and I can talk and BS non stop and I look forward.
It's dangerous when we get on the phone.
No, I know. Because if we have other things to do that day, they're not going to get done it. This is way more fun than working.
I mean, in all honesty, we're not allowed to live in the same city because I'm pretty sure we would be single again because our women would leave us because they would wonder about us.
That's true.
Maybe that's. And they just would. They wouldn't be able to compete.
Maybe that's our strategy. Like. Like the two of us together, we would be so magnetic, we might need bodyguards.
Well, you know, I. I could see in a few years if we lived in the same city, just you and I.
And by. And by that you mean San Diego, right?
Right, right. Of course. You Know, just, you know, people come over and they're like, what are you guys doing today? Brad and I were just gonna cuddle and talk about marketing.
Yeah, Is that wrong? Is that weird?
Well, we're just wrapped up in a bacon blanket, you know. Yeah, two pigs in a blanket.
How's your opt in rate, big boy?
Exactly, exactly.
What's your conversion?
Oh, you know. You want to split test me.
Hey, Mindy, go get us a soda.
Yeah, right. That's going to go over well.
Yeah, I don't think so. Well, buddy, I really appreciate your time on the show. I encourage every single person listening. Tell you what, like, even if you've never thought about public speaking as a business, you're going to get a lot out of this for any business you're in. And most of the people listening to this show are in business. They're entrepreneurs, they're executives of some sort, so. Or they're trying to be.
Brad, should I. Should I do something crazy right now?
Dance party or.
No? No. The first three people that email me, Sean stevenson.com. that's S E a N at S E A N S T E P H E N S o n. The first three people that email me, I will give them 500 discount to come to my program.
Damn, look at that. And they can buy a lot of bacon with 500.
We're 500 thinking about how much bacon they could have. But they have to email me and in the subject line they have to say, friend of Brad.
Nice. Friend of Brad. Send that to sean@sean Stevenson.com. right. Dude, that's really generous.
Off. Love you.
That pays. That pays for somebody's flight. If they got a fly in, you're basically buying their flight.
There you go. I will buy your flight.
That's amazing, dude. I really like it. And they'll get to hang out with me, which is, you know, a little bit better than getting to hang out with you.
Way better.
Way better. So we can. And if who had those three people, we can all sit in the back and we'll like heckle you from the stage.
Please, please.
But that was really generous of you. I really like that. So the first three people do that. Anybody else? If you don't make it, if Sean says too late, too slow, you can still come to the show. Hey, that rhymes. Didn't mean to. But you'll see me, you'll see Sean, you'll see some of my mentors. I'm looking forward to meeting several of the folks you've got, like Jay Abraham and Dean and C and Joe again and some of these people who are the tip top of the marketing world. But I really, I wanted to get on the show to promote the, you know, the event because you're not. You don't do a lot of these things, so people should be really fortunate to be able to get more of you.
Thank you, brother.
And so everybody else listening to this, this has been one of my favorite shows. My favorite shows that I do are always the ones that I do alone. Obviously, you know the solo cast, but. I'm kidding. But review the show on itunes.
Wrapping yourself in bacon.
Yes. Share the show. And if you're listening on itunes, if you're listening on YouTube or anywhere else, we've got this. Go subscribe to the show. You won't miss any more. You can get on my newsletter list@baconratbusiness.com and you can send me any questions that you have, anything you want to know. Send an email to askbradaconrappedbusiness.com and this has been a lot of fun. I encourage you to go check out Sean, check out his stuff, come to the event, and if nothing else, go get on Sean's newsletter so you can find out where he's speaking next and what you know he's up to. Sean's mission is to rid the world of insecurity. If you're the least bit insecure about anything in your life, then I think you need a bigger dose of my boy here. So, buddy, I appreciate it. We will talk really soon and thanks a lot.
You bet, brother.
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