35th Birthday Thoughts: A Message To All 20 Somethings
11 Dec 2025 · 22 min
Ryan Daniel Moran turns 35 and divides life into three acts: 0-35, 35-70, 70-105. He tells his 25-year-old self to think long-term over metrics, build internal freedom, own your relationship with yourself first, and buy Bitcoin and real estate early.
Questions this episode answers
35
October 12, 2022
Chapters
I turned 35 this week and in my head I think I'm gonna live.
At least to 105, hopefully longer, because I think the technology is gonna make that easier. But 35 is interesting for me because it's like the entry point of the second part of a three part act. The first 35 years are when you're young and figuring things out. And then that second act, 35 to 70, that's like the prime of life. It's when you're at your highest production. That's when you're.
Able to use the life experience that you gained in the first part of life and apply yourself and grow and leave a legacy. And then that last third, from 70 to 105, you're just old. That's when you're thinking about what you're leaving for the next generation. But it's this chapter in which you're becoming the legacy that you're going to leave. And I've been thinking about entering into this chapter where this is really where it starts. This is really day one for me. This is really day one of the next 35 years of whatever I'm going to create and build and become. I don't know what that's going to look like, but I do know what I've learned up to this point. And so in a mythical time in which we're able to time travel, if my 25 year old self sees this, I want to give you a couple lessons that I've learned up until this point. And I hope that it prepares you for the person that you will become and the person that you want to be. If you were to ask my 25 year old self what he would be like at 35, I think he would have said something very different than how life turned out. First of all, I don't know that he would have expected to have two kids at this point. I don't know that he would know that he'd be living in a completely different state than he lives in. And I definitely don't think that he would think that the projects he's working on now are very similar to the projects he's working on in 10 years. And it would have been very helpful to know that. It would have been really helpful for the 25 year old version of myself to know that the things that he's doing now are not temporary projects. They're not things that he's going to do for a little bit and leave behind. They're things that are going to be around for more than 10 years, my 25 year old self was just starting a business that he would sell and then at 35 would be buying back to do it all over again. The 25 year old version of myself would not know that the content that he's creating now is still going to be affecting people and is going to be still building his audience 10 years from now. But man, do I wish he had known that. Because my 25 year old self knew that what he was doing right now was still gonna be building momentum. At 35, he would have taken a very different approach. He would have been thinking about the long term. He would have been thinking about how it impacted people, not how it made him look. He would be thinking about what shift he could give to one person rather than how many views or clicks or dollars or or opt ins or followers each piece of content got him. That's short term thinking of a very insecure 25 year old rather than contributing to the world and creating value for people for generations to come. If my 25 year old self knew that 10 years from now he would still be building that foundation and that it would impact tens of thousands, if not hundreds of thousands, if not millions of people.
Then he could take his ego out of it. Because he could know that what the short term ego metrics of dollars made or followers collected didn't matter at all. What mattered was how he contributed to the people who were behind the clicks and behind the dollars. He'd do a few things differently if he knew that the 25 year old version of me would think that I would feel established at 35. But the truth is at 35 I feel just as young as it did when I was 25. I feel exactly the same. I feel like I have more time at 35 than I did at 25. Because your lens grows at 25, you think that you're running out of time and you gotta hurry up and make it. You gotta hurry up and get yours. Other people are passing you. At 35 I'm like, I got 35 years to create something great. I have so much time to be able to do things the right way. To take that perspective of I'm building something that's still going to have an impact 35 years from now. There's no money to get, there's no followers to obtain, there's no accumulation that needs to happen. You just get to create and that's the process. And the more you create and the more that you can tap into that space, all of the other things are going to Happen just naturally, but they're not what you want anyway. You think that you want those things, but you don't want those things. You think you want those things because that's what in your brain, you think you need to have the permission to do the things that you actually want to do. But what you actually want to do is just create. You just want to create and give and serve and share. That's what you actually want. All those things that you think you want are actually you projecting your own fear and your own lack. And you afraid that you're gonna lose that creative spirit that is really who you are.
But the truth is, that's always with you. No matter what, no matter how much money you have, no matter who you know, no matter how many followers you have, you still have access to that creative spirit in you. And life will give you opportunities to realize that. Because at some point you will forget that that's still in you. And you'll start doing things for short term wins, short term money, short term followers. And when you do that, you're gonna lose all of it. Meaning that if you do things for followers, you will lose followers. If you do things for status, you will lose status. If you do things for money, money will elude you and eventually you just give up. And you say, fine, that doesn't work, I might as well just do what I enjoy. And surprisingly.
Those are the things that are going to give you all the things that you thought you wanted. You'll get them because you won't need them anymore. You never wanted them anyway. That wasn't the point. You're here not for what you create. You are here just to create. You're here for the point and the enjoyment of the creation process. So anything that gets in the way of that is a waste of time, is a waste of energy. Now there will be people who say, yeah, well, you're more productive when you follow the dollars. You're more productive when you pay attention to what your followers say or what the marketplace says. But again, that's not actually what you want. You don't actually want that stuff. You want the fun of the creation. That's freedom for you. You'll have to get kicked around a lot to get this lesson, but eventually you'll get it. Don't worry. I'd like my 25 year old self to know that the faster he can learn that other people aren't thinking about you, the better off you'll be. A lot of people will tell you not to care about what other people Think. But the truth is they're not even thinking about you. So when you care about what other people think about you, you. You're creating an idea that they care or think about you in the first place and they don't. So it's a false idea that you shouldn't care what other people think about you. Cause they actually only think about themselves when they judge you. They're actually just viewing you through their own lens. That's their own filter. So they're thinking about themselves. And unfortunately for you, you are also a person. So you too are only thinking about yourself. So the faster that you can just learn that everyone is only thinking about themselves, the better off that you'll be. There is a healthy amount of selfishness. There's a healthy amount of selfishness for you to be protective of your own energy and focus so that you can create what is meaningful for you. And there's a healthy selfishness to create things for yourself. This is true in business, this is true in content, this is true in relationships. Create what is meaningful for you and you will call the people that are drawn to that fourth and you guys will have a great time. You'll have an awesome time. Now there is something to be said about true selflessness too. Because true selflessness is is you doing things for others without anything expected in return. Here's the weird irony of it though. True selflessness is the most exhilarating experience in life. You've got to understand that being truly selfless is so fun and rewarding that it's also a selfish act. It's a weird irony that one will take you a little bit, that might take you your whole life. But the faster that you can drop this idea that anyone is thinking anything about you, the better off you'll be. I'd like my 25 year old self to know that your thoughts and your beliefs are your reality. Some people will say that your thoughts create your reality, but your thoughts are your reality. What you believe determines what you see. And the cool part of this is that you can practice the beliefs and the thoughts that you want. So if there is something that you want to experience more of, you can cultivate that. If you want to see or feel more love, you can tap into it at any time. You can train yourself to see it. If you want to experience, experience more opportunity, you can train yourself to see it. There's an infinite amount. There's an infinite amount of money. There's an infinite amount of love. There's an infinite amount of joy. And there's also an infinite amount of fear or of pain or of lack. It's just about what you tune yourself to. So if you want to experience more of the stuff that you desire, you can practice that. Just like you build a muscle, you can build a belief. You can train a belief to see more of the world that you want rather than the world that you think just is. There is no is. You just have a brain, and your brain is a filter. So train your brain to filter for what you want more of. Ask yourself the question, not what do I want, but what do I want more of? Because what you want is actually just the things that you've already experienced that made you feel alive. And you can train yourself to see more of it. And anytime that you feel lack or that you feel pain is because you've locked yourself into a perspective of seeing that. But there is an infinite amount of everything that you want. And you can train yourself, practice yourself into seeing it. Relationships are everything. Everything that you do is really for relationships. You want money so that people will admire you, or so that you can have the experiences with the people that you want. You want to look a certain way because you want to connect with people at some level. You want the car or the house because you think that other people will connect with you differently if you have those things. But the more that you have a relationship with yourself, that's awesome. The more that you'll feel free to connect with other people too, because you can drop this expectation of what other people are going to do for you, and you'll just be present with them. And at 25, you don't quite get this yet because you're kind of a selfish asshole. And don't worry, you're 25. You're supposed to be this way, but you'll have plenty of experiences that'll knock that out of you. Yeah, those are painful lessons to learn. And kids will shake that out of you really quick. You're going to be a dad, by the way.
That old take care of that and you'll be very humbled. And then you realize that the way you view yourself is also the way that you view your relationships. And the way you view yourself is actually what creates the relationships you have. If you feel lack in yourself, you will project that into your relationships and you will resent other people. But if you feel complete in yourself, then you will just be able to give to others and you'll be able to actually relate to them. So relationships are what we want, but the irony is that it's the relationship with yourself that allows you to have the healthy relationships that make you feel the way that you want to feel.
Buy Bitcoin. I know you think it's a scam and that you think it's stupid and it's a stupid Ponzi scheme. But. But a lot of other people think differently than you. Don't fight that. Just. Just.
Please, just buy it and sell in 2021 at 25. You know, you went to college and you studied economics, and your background in economics was in Austrian economics. And so your background thinks that the world is just, like, going to crash at anytime. And you also have a Christian background. And so in your Christian background, you were sort of trained that the world is going to degrade until Jesus comes back. So you have a little thing in your mind that is always expecting things to go wrong. And that's actually a selfish perspective, because what it's doing is you actually just want to be right. You want to be right. You want your training to come out as being the correct one. And so you're expecting the world to fall off a cliff at any moment, and that's not true. In fact, the world is getting better and better and better. It's getting more and more efficient. There's more and more opportunities. So stop holding yourself back. Stop playing defense. Stop preventing yourself from. From playing as big as you can, because the economy is just gonna expand. The world's just gonna expand. The population is just gonna expand. The government's just gonna expand. There's never gonna be this magical time or this terrible time in which everything changes. And there's definitely not gonna be this time where it's just, oh, the world's ending. There will be times that it looks like that there's major things that happen. Wars and pandemics and economic crashes. Those things happen. But the world keeps going. The world keeps expanding. And human beings are very good at coming up with solutions to problems. So be one of them. Be one of those people that creates new opportunities and participates in them. Be optimistic about the world, not pessimistic about the world. Even if you're wrong, you'll be way happier. And if you die, you'll die a happy man. Be optimistic. Play for the long term. The world gets better. There's more opportunities coming. They're always coming. There's another one and another one and another one. So you don't need to be all hung up on this being the right opportunity or this project being the one. There's no lack. There's no scarcity. Do you play your game? Play big, go full out, do that, have fun. And look forward to things changing. Because there's gonna be new relationships and new opportunities and new money and it's always gonna be coming your whole life, it's always gonna be that way. There's always gonna be new stuff. It's always gonna keep growing. So participate in that. When there's new inventions and new opportunities and new platforms, play in them. Enjoy them. Buy into them, Experience them. Don't fight it. Expand with it. Buy Tesla stock, buy Apple stock. Buy real estate in Austin. A lot of real. As much real estate in Austin as you can. All of them look weird in the short term, but long term they all work out. Don't buy short term investments. Just don't do them. Just don't do them. I know you think you're smarter than the rest of the world and you can see when something's going to go up or down. I know you think that you are not smarter than the market. Buy long term things that will make you fabulously wealthy. Forget about this short term stuff, about what's going to happen even three, six months from now. I know you think six months is a long time. It's not. Buy things. They're going to exist and grow for the next six years. 16 years, 60 years. Play that and you will be way wealthier than you could ever imagine. But you've got to let go of this short term. Thinking of playing six months to six months, forget about it. Remember, the world's gonna keep going and growing. So don't fight it. Play that game. You're not smarter than experts. I know you think that the common knowledge is for dumb people and that there are secrets out there about health or wealth or investing. You aren't smarter than experts. Be humble. Recognize that you don't know everything and that there are much smarter people than you who dedicate their lives to studying things. Listen to their advice. Not the bloggers or the. The podcasters. The people who are actually experts at things they know better than you. This is especially true with health. I know you think that because you follow a few blogs and podcasts and you read some books and you're excited about being the one who believes differently than everybody else. That you're going to find the diet or the hack. Nope, nope. It's the basics, man. Like take care of your health. You don't get it back. You have to fight for it. You are not always going to be indestructible, so plan accordingly. Stop seeing people as Stepping stones. Let go of this idea that people are gatekeepers to opportunities and just start showing up and serving people and being present with them. Because the irony is, is that was what will open up opportunities for you. People can read that if you look at people like they are in front of your opportunity, then you will treat them like a commodity and you won't treat them like a person. That's not who you are. Be a person and be of service to those people and that will take you way farther than you could ever imagine. And finally, do more things that you enjoy. When you are happy, you are just the best. When you're having fun, man, you're just the coolest guy to be around. When you're enjoying yourself, you are just the most delightful, wonderful, kind, funny, smart, big thinking dreamer. You're just awesome to be around. And when you're not happy, you suck.
When you're not happy, when you doubt yourself, when you haven't slept, when you're not taking care of yourself, when you've been sitting alone for way too long, you're just the worst. You don't even like yourself. So just do more of things you like. You'll actually make more money this way because people will like being around you and you'll be smarter, you'll be sharper, you'll be less in lack. Just. Just do more fun stuff, right? You think you got to be productive all the fucking time. You're actually more productive when you're happy, all right? So just. Just do more fun shit. Because you're just great. You're great when you're happy. And you, you're just the worst. Worst when you're not. So please, please do this for me. Lighten up, kid. I used to wonder where I will be in 10 years, what things I will have accomplished, how much money I'll have, what the circumstances of my life will be. And now I just want to be happier, healthier, and wealthier as a proxy, meaning I want to be way wealthier than I am today because I've had such a great time, because I put so much meaning and so much purpose into my projects that people couldn't help but be attracted to them. I hope that my content has spread because I enjoyed it so much. I hope that my employees are still with me and that we're an even stronger, more efficient, more bonded team because we doubled down on what we wanted. And I hope people feel drawn to our work rather than us converting them. I hope I will have moved away from feeling like I need to sell anybody, and I just created great shit that other people felt drawn to. I hope I am enjoying my work more than ever. I hope I'm enjoying my relationships more than ever. I hope I am waking up excited about what I get to create rather than hustling to get what I think I want. Because I'm starting to learn that everything that we want is an emotion. It's an emotional experience, and we can have that now. And I believe that that's what Jesus meant when he said, seek ye first. The kingdom and everything else will be added unto you as well. Enjoy these next 10 years. Enjoy the work that you do and everything else will be added onto you as well. We're just getting started. Let's start. Act 2 if you found value in this podcast podcast and you're ready to go Deeper, here are three resources where we can help you. One, you can grab my book 12 months to 1 million on Audible or Amazon. It has over a thousand reviews and it's the playbook to building a seven figure business. Second, you can join our community of entrepreneurs who are following a plan to build a 1% net worth by building businesses and investing the profits. You can get plugged in@capitalism.com.
And third, if you're looking to go deeper and build a seven figure business that you can sell, you can work closely with us inside the Capitalism incubator and you can get on the waiting list and find out what we do over at capitalism.com Inc. That's capitalism.com Inc.


