Nick Unsworth: Finding Purpose and Meaning In Life and Business

Foreigners. Ryan, Daniel Moran here. Welcome to Freedom Fast Lane. Today I'm going to be joined by Nick Unsworth.

Nick, of course, is the host of the Life on Fire podcast.

And today he and I are going to be talking about finding purpose. Now we talk about this and we actually disagree on quite a bit on.

What purpose is and what the process is.

But the reason I wanted to have Nick on was because I remember in my early 20s feeling like I had money, but I had absolutely no purpose. And that was probably the least happy I ever was in my life.

At the time.

It felt like the end of the world to just be in the world and not have any meaning. And I know that that is a common thing in today's crazy fast paced, social media paced world. I speak with particularly men often about this being a problem because quite honestly, our natural inputs that gave us purpose are mostly shut off now. We don't have to fight for food, we don't have to fight to survive. So we basically live in this, in this area where our genes don't know how to respond and find meaning in it all. So Nick talks about this a lot, especially on the Life on Fire podcast. So I asked him to come on the show and give his opinion and his take on it. And we don't always agree, but it makes for a very interesting conversation. I want to give a one public apology in this podcast. My mic was malfunctioning. So I want to give public apologies to Nick Unsworth for having an annoying buzzing sound in the background when I'm speaking. But I still think you're going to enjoy this chat with Nick Unsworth.

Nick Unsworth, welcome to Freedom Fastlane. How's it going, man?

Dude, it is going great and fired up to be here.

Well, you know, I heard a rumor about you, Nick, and I want to get this out of the way. I heard lately that you are suffered some burns from being so on fire.

So tell us, tell us what the heck is going on. Are you okay?

You know, I am okay. You know, a lot of cream, a lot of ointments on me. But you know, it's part of living your life on fire. You know, it just comes with the territory. But it's all good.

Nick has gone through a lot. Everybody, if you've got any treatments for burns, please put them in the show notes over@freedomfastlane.com. nick, obviously your brand is Life on Fire. And what interests me about it is we were talking before the recording that you kind of cut out the middle part and go right for the development part, we were talking about how entrepreneurs are really drawn to the personal development side of things, which is your focus. You're an entrepreneur who has kind of come full circle and now focuses completely on that personal development side. And you made the comment that sometimes entrepreneurship makes people. People's lives worse. Tell me what you meant by that.

Yeah, so, you know, I've done, you know, a few years of business coaching, and, you know, as you're saying, I've pivoted into more personal development. And what's really interesting is that for some people, it's just not right for them, you know, and because what happens is if they're not so mentally tough and strong in their minds, and if they haven't really figured out the vision and the purpose for their life and overcome some of these limiting beliefs, they end up leaving their job, working their butts off in a business, and build like this, this cage. It's like they build their own job for themselves that ends up being worse than any career path that they could have ever had because they beat themselves up. You know, they end up working themselves to the bone and being a perfectionist and working, you know, 12 hours a day and. And oftentimes making less money, having less freedom, but they're pursuing this shiny object of making a lot more money or pursuing a get rich quick idea. For some people that don't.

Have themselves together from a mental toughness standpoint or have the right business idea, it ends up being worse. And that, to me, just breaks my heart. Is he someone just spinning their wheels and trying and trying and trying, and it's like, man, they would be better off if they just stayed where they were at, you know, and just, you know, had the job that they had.

But so let me, let me disagree with you publicly for a moment, and then we'll come back full circle and be friends again. But I disagree with the idea of the way that you described it as someone leaving their job to be an entrepreneur and then starting, I think the natural tendency of entrepreneurs to get something going, to wait for it, to prove it, prove something, and then they make a big decision. And the big decision usually, in my experience, only comes when you have something that's already catching on. It's very rare that I have seen an entrepreneur be like, screw this job. I'm gonna go do my own thing, and then just waiting for something to show up. If that's the type of person where they're just like, I'm running from pain, I hope something shows up. You're right. They're going to get caught in the crosshairs. But if they're planting seeds and within 3, 6, 12 months they have something booming, I think the natural progression is for most people to gravitate towards entrepreneurship because I think that the entrepreneurial and even solopreneurial way is growing faster than your traditional job. So you can either push back at me or clarify what you meant.

Yeah. So I mean, if you are working and then you start a business and it's excelling at such a pace that it's making more money than your job and your lifestyle is better, well, of course that's an easy decision to just, you know, you leave your job and then you're excelling. But I'm talking about the majority of people, you know, and it's. And it's not just in my personal experience, it's, you know, being after being in the coaching industry and seeing the inside of a lot of coaching businesses. The math is crazy. I mean, the math is really tough, you know, and it's kind of like when you hear, you know, most businesses, most startups fail, there's 90% of them fail. It's like seeing behind the curtain of many large coaching organizations. And it's people at all different levels. It's people that have the job that moonlight and then have the additional business because they're really excited about an idea. What breaks my heart is they'll sacrifice time with their kids, they'll sacrifice their life. But if they haven't cleared limiting beliefs and if they haven't grown and developed their mindset strong enough, it's like they'll do that for 10 years. You know, they'll do that and miss out on so much of life by moonlighting and not even getting anywhere. Now, granted, some people, yeah, absolutely. Like, you know, some people take off, but it's just about, you know, the majority versus how most people are versus, you know, the majority of people are going through that pain of trying to do both. Like a lot of people. Shoot, I've seen it many times over where they get some traction in the business. Their revenues, let's say, equal their business, and then their revenues from their business will equal their job. And then they'll leave the job and it doesn't get much better because they haven't cleared those beliefs.

Yeah. So I've had a different set of experiences, but here's where I agree with you. I remember my life being horrible, at least in my own perception as an entrepreneur, when I got what I wanted and then I had no idea what to do with my life. And that was. I had the passive income, the supposed passive income that I worried about day and night. I had money in the bank that I was terrified would all go away. I had the income streams that I didn't really feel passionate about anymore. So I had golden handcuffs, even though I was an entrepreneur and I had no idea what the hell I was doing with my life. And that was probably that. That was top two hardest times of my life, that period. About two years of just being completely purposeless, completely whatever the opposite of on fire is.

Wet blanket.

I was freezing.

I had life freezing cold.

That's.

That's what I had. So I have experienced that side of entrepreneurship making your life worse. But overall.

I think it's the natural trend for people to be more and more entrepreneurial. But let me ask you this. I'm assuming, and you can correct me if I'm wrong, most of the people come to you, and they come to your events and they seek your counsel because there's something about their life that they're not getting, even though they are a successful entrepreneur. So how do you work with that person? And what are the things that you see holding them back from living the life they want?

Yeah, absolutely. And I think with what you were saying about that purposeless, you know, the wet blanket moment, if you will, it's like, to me, having that life vision is one of the most important things. It's like it feeds our soul. It's our purpose. And whether we're successful in a career or as an entrepreneur or we're not, it's like what I found to be the common denominator for entrepreneurs, you know, for people in all walks of life, is that, you know, as human beings, we crave this. We crave the sense of purpose, you know, and a lot of. I mean, there's a gazillion books on purpose. It's like we crave figuring out, like, what is our life about? And I think that whether you're a successful entrepreneur or not, it's like, either way, that, to me, is one of the most important pieces of a life on fire. Because it's like when you have that vision for your life and you've got this sense of purpose that you will run through walls. It's like the conversation we had before we started recording about, you know, Gary V. Is so on fire for what he's doing because he loves it so much. He feels so much purpose behind it. And when we have that, I feel like that's where people will overcome whatever challenge they have to because they feel like they're changing the world in some way. You know, they've got such a sense of fulfillment behind it. And that for me, that's what lights me up is when can help someone and identify what that vision is.

It's like the light bulb moment, but it's way bigger and deeper than that. If you've ever. I haven't seen this, but I have a buddy that told me that when he had his child, the doctor slapped the child's back and the baby's eyes opened up and boom, there was life. That's to me, that's what. When you create your life vision and you have that dialed in, it's like everything shifts and changes. You know, the things that were tough are now easy. It's like swimming up the river and then it's like once you've got that vision and purpose, you're instead of going against the current, you're like, you're in flow. So that's really what like for me, that's a big part of, you know, helping entrepreneurs and all people with how.

Do you forgive me, Nick? Let me, let, let me say this. Hey, Nick. Requesting permission to speak freely.

Permission granted.

Okay, thank you. So we hear that all the time. Like that is, that's so popularized in self improvement, self development stuff. Find your purpose, go after it, it'll light you up. I'm yet to hear anyone put a good how to on that, except for maybe my buddy Jordan Gray who described it as you're already yourself. There's nothing to figure out. It's more like sliding into a mud pit. Just let yourself slide into it. That's the best description that in my experience has kind of captured that when you are advising somebody, I imagine this comes up quite a bit. And I'm yet to hear anybody really give a good. Here's how to find your purpose. Here's how to figure that piece of your life out. In fact, most people that I see kind of talking about it don't have any idea what they're doing with their life behind the scenes. So I want to pose the question to you of how do you counsel somebody to identify that in their own life so that they can pursue it.

Absolutely. Yeah. I mean after helping hundreds of people in a one on one setting, in group settings at our events, I've helped a lot of people, you know, break through this. And so my brain, I'm a very how to thinker and for those of you how to thinkers out there, this will Be good. I have. I have a couple different strategies that I use to break it through. So I literally have, you know, I've got a presentation that is for our paid clients, so I'm happy to share in, like, the notes just as no. No email, no fee. But it literally breaks down this process. It takes an hour. And now I'll just give you some of the highlights because I know we don't have a ton of time, but one of the first things that I look to is what I call the 3s strategy. So what that means is the first S is story, and then it's stance, and then it's your strategy. So in your story, I do a timeline exercise, because what you'll find is that when you go back and you literally go all the way back to childhood and you write down and identify the milestones in your life, what you're looking for is to first just brain dump. And, like, whatever significant moments happened, you want to visually see. See them on your timeline. Because in our brains, we just don't. We don't recognize these things that have happened that are significant. We have to actually see them to really, like, connect the dots. And so what happens is when you look back, you know, in my case, one of the aha moments when I did this exercise with a coach that I paid a lot of money to was I realized that everything that I've been pursuing has been because of my experience with my mom and my dad. You know, my dad was a provider, a VP of a building company, but the dude was never around. I mean, he was so focused on providing that he missed me growing up. And as a kid, I didn't get it. I resented him. Since then, I've realized he's an honorable, honorable man for doing that. But, like. But I, you know, I didn't get that, and I missed that from him. And so for me, it led me to wanting to be an entrepreneur. It led me to these, you know, 11 business failures and, you know, pursuing this freedom. And so when you look at the timeline, it allows you to connect different dots. Now, what happens is, for some people, when you have this lens of looking at your biggest challenges and realizing that your biggest mess is oftentimes your biggest message. So, you know, during this exercise, I had a woman who, you know, she came to me, and she literally came to me for marketing help. And she's an insurance agent, and she started her own brokerage, and she was doing pretty good, but she wanted to do better. And when I went through the process, I talked about her story. Well, part of her significant. Part of her story was her fourth child was autistic. And so here I am, as the coach, writing that down. Okay, that's a significant piece. Do the timeline exercise. And then we get to the second S, which is her stance. I described it as. When you think about your stance in life, what pisses you off? What's the movement you're starting? What problem are you solving? What's the legacy you're building? It gets people to think a little bit bigger about their life and about their business. Well, all of a sudden, she starts talking about. About autism, and it pisses her off the fact that for her son, she spent so much money and devoted so many years of her life to bettering her son with autism, and she literally shifted him. Now, he's not completely off the autism spectrum, but she radically changed the outcome of his life based on all these things that she did. And so that was her stance. I'm like, okay, well, that's interesting. And then we got into strategy, and all of a sudden, strategy just means, what are you going to do now? What are you going to do next? And then she came back to insurance, and I was like, well, if money were no object, and if you literally had $100 billion in your checking account because you won the biggest Powerball we've ever had on Earth, and you've already traveled the world, you've already.

Given back, you've already given a ton of money away, but you still have 100 billion in checking, what would you do with your time? Would it be insurance? Would you be selling policies? And she looked at me, and that was the moment her eyes lit up. That's the moment I'm getting goosebumps thinking about, I will never for the rest of my life, forget it. She look at me, and it was super emotional. And she said, nick, I would devote my life to solving autism. I would devote my life to building an autism treatment center, because it doesn't exist, the one that needs to be built, that has these specific things that I would do. And I said, well, let's do that. Let's do that. Tracy, why sell another insurance policy if that's the thing? What happened is, in that moment, she realized her life purpose, and her vision actually had to do with her background. And if we didn't go back and look at her past, her biggest challenge is actually her biggest gift. Just like, you know, when you think about, you know, someone like, you know, like a Brandon Burchard, the guy was in a car accident. He Almost died. You know, he realized, did I live? That I love, that I matter? So it's like, oftentimes your biggest challenge is actually your biggest blessing. Now, not for everybody, but in her case, it took going through the 3s strategy. It took the lottery strategy, which is what I call it, which is where you get the person in this mental state. And I normally do it through, like a guided visualization, because if it's just a question like, hey, so what would you do if you had all the money in the world? You know, it's not. We're not really building the setting right now together, but you kind of can see where, you know, how I do this with people. But when you strip money out of the equation, what happens is people think very differently about their business. They think very differently about their life because we're always pursuing material stuff and money. And this happened with me, with this farmer guy. Last week, he flies into San Diego. This Guy's got this $5 million farm. He's got an autopilot. He makes so much money, doesn't know what to do with it. He started this thing, cash cow farmer, a whole SaaS business, and he's blowing 50 hours a week on it and doing all this stuff. It's not making money. Nick, I hired you to help me market this thing. What the hell's going. Walk him through the three S's, his story and how he got here and his stance. For him, he wants to give his son the best. He wants to travel with his son. So his stance is actually about his son's life. And then so the strategy was, well, what the heck are you doing, Scott? Why are you blowing 50 hours a week on this SaaS business? Cash cow farmer, trying to teach farmers how to buy and sell grain when it's losing 75k a year. I was like, dude, just dump that. And you've got the farm that's kicking butt. And it's like, do the travel and do the things that you want to do. And he loves to write. It's like you can create significance and write and become an author and travel with your son. So it's like he just realized what was important to him. And for every person, it's different. But, you know, basically, when you go through the 3s process, that's big. The question what would you do if you had all the money in the world? Would you still say the same answer? Would you still say insurance agent? Would you still say, I'm going to sell widgets? Those are a couple of the tools and then I also have an exercise where it's like you connect the dots on what are you good at? What are you passionate about? Really? We're just digging and prodding to figure out what are the meaningful things that you would love to do. What happens is when someone grabs a hold of a vision, most people retreat. So it's like autism treatment center. If we flip back to Traci now, and as soon as that vision came into her mind, she got so fired up. I mean, it was tears. It was incredible. But you know what happens? Most people, all of a sudden, they say, nick, how could I do that? I've never built a nonprofit. I don't know how to build a building, like, in it so far out of her capacity that they rule it out instantaneously. And it's like, no, no, no. But you just said if money were no object, that's what you would do. And so what I do is I then built a plan for her that was all right. Your insurance agency is now your banker, but we have to think of it differently. So her plan was all right, go out and you got to start hiring producers to work underneath you to be able to cash flow this. You've got to get your 501. I connected her with Adam Braun from Pencils of Promise. So, long story short, she also takes my advice of making her vision public. She makes a vision board, she writes a letter as if she's already achieved it, and she declares on Facebook that she's building that center, and she freaking tattoos the autism speak puzzle piece on her wrist and says, I'm building this thing by 2019. And you know what? Because she had the guts to publicly do it, and she followed my vision process. That's not just a law of attraction, like, woo, woo. Like, put it out there and it'll come to you. She had the guts to say, I'm doing this, and dude, as a result, I mean, fast forward eight months later, she's already got her 501C3, dude. She's got a couple board members, she's got a location picked out. It's insane how fast it's come together. It's super exciting, as you can tell.

Yeah, we can be friends again now, Nick. And the reason is, one of the things that I've discovered, and kind of discovered this the hard way, is that when money is the goal, and I love money, I think money is amazing, I'm gonna need a lot of it to buy the Cleveland Indians. But when that becomes the goal and it becomes the only Pursuit, you can still do plenty of good in the world. You can do lots of really amazing things. You can grow a great business and have happy customers and leave an amazing legacy, but I don't think you end up happy. And they're two different goals, and it's fine to pursue either of them. I was having a conversation with. With an individual, actually. My former. My former trainer, and he's an enormous man. I think he's. I think he's got, like, the physique that I want to. You know, I want to take a supplement and look like that, right?

Like. Like a Greek God.

There you go. And like, Greek gods would be like, yeah, but I don't look like Nathaniel. So we were having this conversation about. We're actually. We were in our mastermind called the Back Room, and we were in a Cleveland Indian suite, and we were talking about my physique because I'm in the best shape of my life. And I was like, yeah, but I don't look like you. And he said, why do you want to look like me? And I said, well, I want to command a room when I walk in. And he said, I'm in this room, and I don't. I don't feel like I'm commanding it. Y' all have huge businesses, so my pursuit is muscle. Your pursuit might be money. Other dudes, it's sex. Other people, it's the next tie. And there's, like, a piece of us that is always chasing something. This. This elusive form of growth. And for many years, I. I considered that money and hustle and entrepreneurship, that was my drug. Some people, it's adding the next ten pounds on their bench press. Some people, that is sleeping with the next person, the other, it's the next life, the next, like on Facebook. But there is this need for more that happens that we get trapped into. And the. If we don't ever pause and retreat from that distraction and that egoic pursuit, we lose sight of the purpose that ultimately will bring us even more money, happiness, and gift to the world. And I have found. And the reason I'm resonating with what you're saying is I have found that when I'm traveling, when I am happiest, when I am in the state of not needing anything, being fully supported, being fully in flow, having fun, being around people that I love, and there's nothing to do with money or. Or comparison or anything, that's when I have my best ideas. It's when I feel the most like myself. It's the time where I realize where I want to spend my time. And staying in that place results in more money, more freedom, more ability to give. And that has been my experience. And it sounds to me like that's what you're describing in a kind of a different way.

Yeah, absolutely. I mean, awareness is such an important aspect because.

To me, awareness is a muscle. You're very aware that you can understand that flow state that you're in. And you're also aware that when you're comparing yourself to others and you're chasing and chasing, you're chasing, it's like that's the game of more. And if we don't recognize that, some people get stuck in that, and if they're not aware that they're in it, then.

They end up having. They're chasing the thing as opposed to experiencing life and living happy and fulfilled. So that's part of, I think what's great about personal development or mentoring or coaching or even podcasts like this is when someone's aware of that, they can break the pattern and they can recalibrate and focus on what's really important. And that's what's cool about life, is that, hey, you know what? Things always change, and that's what's so great, is that we always get to grow and we always get to pivot with purpose and continue. And it's always evolving. So I always like to tell people that it's like you've got to take the pressure off of trying to claim your purpose in a 15 minute setting. It's about taking the next best action. In India, they call it Dharma. It's like it's your right next best action. And what's great is that always will continue to lead you closer and closer to the path. And it's like, it's not like you're living without it. It's like that for me, starting a Facebook marketing agency because a business failed from traditional ads that my 3s, then my biggest pain was because traditional ads didn't work. My stance was, I've got to do something about this. There's a lot of businesses suffering because they're doing, you know, they're advertising on TV and print and radio, and there's got to be a better way. So my Dharma, my purpose in that moment was, hey, I'm going to solve that pain and learn a skill. And it was beautiful that, that process. I just, you know, I tattooed a goal in my chest, you know, and I like, I went out and, and built and sold that company. And it's so cool. That now when I look back, it's like all these pieces came together because now I feel like it really got me to where I needed to be, to be in a position where I can now do what I'm doing now and helping people with their purpose.

Now, do you believe, and I'm looking for your opinion. Do you subscribe to the idea that there is a purpose to individuals or is it more a subjective thing that we follow in order to reach goals and stay happy and on track?

So, I mean, I've got some pretty deep rooted spiritual beliefs, and I believe that every single human being has a calling on their life. I feel like no matter what your circumstance is, that for some people, that even would think, who, me? Like, I'm only this little old, you know, bank teller.

I think that not necessarily predetermined, but I think that everyone, they've got a mind for the goal, but everyone has a calling on their life.

I'm sorry to interrupt, but what does that mean to you if somebody has a calling on their life? Because there's two different ways we could look at that. That means there's something you've got to find and figure out, or it just means that you're called to do more. How do you define a calling on one's life?

Yeah, I mean, I would say, I mean, it's a purpose. They have a purpose and a reason for being here. Now, for some people, it could be being the best mom. For some people, it could be building a huge business. But I think that as for us, we don't know what it is. So we've got to just take actions and we've got to grow into it. We've got to, in a sense, figure it out. It's like we don't know the blueprint. We just have to trust and take action and use processes like I was talking about to discover it.

What I'm getting at is.

In your opinion, do you think that there is that one thing for people's lives, meaning the person who is a great mom, Is that a defined purpose or is in your opinion, that fluid and can change meaning, does that woman need to find that thing, or is that just something that she chooses?

Well, I believe that it's always evolving because it's like I was saying, my purpose at the time building that Facebook ad business was to get me here to this spot. So I think it's like what I was saying with the Dharma. It's your right purpose and the right action in that moment. But it definitely evolves as you go. So it's like when you're aware and when you have a vision for your life when you're 15 versus when you're 30, it's like it's always evolving. And I just believe that every person is, when I say, called to do something with their life. That we all have a purpose within us. And that purpose, as we grow, it's going to continue to evolve and continue to evolve.

I think the danger that a lot of people fall into is. And now this is my opinion, but I think that there's a danger in thinking that there's one thing out there for you and like you're meant to do something and you have to figure out what it is and what it's kind of like there's a magical person out there and when you meet them, you'll always be happy and you'll, you'll die together. Like in the Notebook. They're equally dangerous beliefs of there's something out there that you need to find. I think I feel the freest in my life now because I have let go of this idea that there's anything to, to find or figure out. There's only things for you to create. And that requires a lot of responsibility for you to create what it is that you want to experience. If you are waiting to find whatever it is that's out there for you, I think that removes your responsibility from the process. And there's just something that's going to happen and you're going to find it. And I think that leaves people questioning their entire lives. Am I on? Is this my purpose? Is this what I want to do? Am I with the right person? And I don't think that those are helpful questions. I think it is more about creating where you are and where you're going. And I have experienced times where a buddy of mine, Greg Reed, he's been on the show, walked me through kind of a purpose finding exercise. And it was extremely helpful for me in the time that I received it because it got me to the next step. But I told him, you know, my purpose, if you will, is much different than it was five years ago. Completely different because I'm at a different stage with different experiences now. So I have to reset my, my thoughts around that every couple of years. And so I'm just, I'm just, I was just curious if.

But I think that that's, I think you're echoing what I was saying about that it's always evolving. Yeah, And I agree that, I mean, if we're putting so much pressure on ourselves that it's one specific thing that you've got to find this end all, be all. I agree with that can be damaging because it's like you could spend your whole life searching. What I love is that we have people that the outcome literally after a one hour session together is that everyone knows what their vision is and their purpose because it's something that it's their next right action. And it can't be wrong if it's something that you believe in, if that's the stance that you have at that time, like in that 3s process. Because and it does evolve and that's. And you have to have that freedom and peace about it because there's absolutely no point beating yourself up over maybe this isn't right. What I do love is I love recognizing feelings of like am I settling in this relationship? And it's like if you're thinking that you better, like there's something better out there and you should create a vision for that and then go out and get it.

I think I like that word vision. You know, you know the, the idea of where you're going and where you can see yourself. I like that a lot better than purpose because I feel like vision, you can change anytime because you want to, because you need to, because you have a different experience and that can, that can adjust. I'm curious about in, in your events and with your one on ones. I know you work with a lot of entrepreneurs. I would probably guess 90% or more of the people who show up are entrepreneurs seeking something that's missing and do most of them, or you can answer however you feel most comfortable. But do they walk out or do they leave their interactions with Nick Unsworth refining their business or going on a completely different path? And I ask this because.

I've worked with two different types of entrepreneurs. One is so dialed in and focused on what they're doing and they just want the 2 millimeter tweak. And then there's some that they got the money and now they don't know what they're doing next. What type of experiences or decisions do you see the people that come through.

Getting, you know, catching on fire?

Where do you see them going next?

I think for, well, for most people that I work with, they've never given themselves the permission to do the thing that they really dream of. And that's oftentimes what ends up happening together is that when they really are in that environment and state, when they, it's like when they.

Think about doing the thing that they would really, really love to do. It oftentimes is different than what they're coming to me for. We've had people that shoot that they've been excited about this new business idea or they've been in a business. And then it's like when you go through the 3s, when you go through the strength finder, what you're good at and what you're passionate about. And then it's like when you talk about the lottery example. And for many people, it's different than what they're currently doing. And I think it's because what they're currently doing is sometimes for people is that I'm doing what I'm doing because I've been doing it for so long and I feel like I should be doing it. Or this is the path that my parents sent me on, or this is where my college professor pushed me on. In a lot of cases nowadays, they were listening to a ton of podcasts, and it's like, all right, well, I'm going to build that kind of a business.

Once they get really clear on what they want and have that new vision for their life, in a lot of cases, it looks different than what they're currently doing. That's what I found from, you know, who I attract, and I do attract a lot more people reinventing and someone that sold their business. Now they're figuring out what's next. And, you know, some. A lot of people that are, you know, starting up, so they're in, like, the buying courses mode, and they're in, like, the, you know, listening to tons of podcasts, but they haven't put it together yet.

What do you think is the end point? And the reason I ask this is. So we were at our mastermind meeting last week, and there's people in our group that followed our trainings are now selling their businesses for $5 million, $15 million, $20 million, and they have no idea what's coming next. But the belief they've always had was, I'm going to build a business, it's going to make me this much money, and then I'm going to be done. And that word always comes up, then I'm done. You know, I am. I'm done. I can do whatever I want at that point. And I'm thinking, you, if it's. I'm gonna do whatever I want at that point. You have no. You are on the fast track to depression, my friend.

I was just gonna say, yeah, you're already done. You've already shot yourself in the foot with a shotgun, you know, so.

So what do you consider the end point or is there one?

Yeah, no, great question. I mean for me, I had a similar experience of, for me my entire life I obsessed about selling a business by 30. I mean I tattooed that on my chest. It was, I mean, crazy. I obsessed about it and once I did it and I got the things that I had put in my vision of a home on the water and nice things and shoot 50k in debt to making some money, I mean it wasn't a huge sale, but it was plenty big for me. But you know what I realized is that, that I went from in a sense like a rags to riches. Now it wasn't fast because I had all these failures and 11 business failures leading up to that. But when I got there, I will never forget for the rest of my life drinking a beer on my balcony, looking at the view that I just paid all this money for. And I'll never forget crying, thinking, I can't believe I pissed away my life in my 20s for this moment. And it was actually I thought my lowest was when I was 50k in debt and my health was totally trashed. It was like my second rock bottom was after I had all the success of selling the business. And the reason is because I had absolutely no purpose because I had the money, but I didn't have love. I didn't enjoy what I was doing because I had a two year earn out and I didn't realize, but when you sell a business, I got stuck working, you know, I mean I got, I was.

The business went from being my vision and fun to someone else's vision. It was more of like a job and I didn't like it. For me, the quote being done is if your view is to think like a lot of baby boomers would think of, all right, well, I'll retire, then I'll be done. Then I'll golf or I'll sell the business and be done. I think we've officially, between you and I, we've shared. That's not the right way to look at it. In my mind the life on fire is. It's having the different areas of your life, those different pillars. It's love. It's love and connection and relationships. It's your health, it's money in your career. And then I truly believe it's like making a difference. And when you've got those four things and they're all up, it's like the most incredible euphoria. It's like, like that to me, is the life on fire because you're in your present and you're enjoying the time. It's like our brand message at one point was like, it's about a journey worth living, not the destination. And when you love your life and the experiences and you're living like you've got two weeks left, that's how much you're loving your life and you're happy. It's like that to me, is that's success. That's how I personally think of it. And when you're enjoying the ride, it's like, then you're never, you know, waiting for this done point. It's like, no, heck no. I've got it now.

I 100% agree, my friend. So, Nick, thank you for what you're doing in the world. Because I think that most entrepreneurs.

Have that misconception, and then they end up really disappointed because they never really get that cleared up. And it's a message that gets lost among people flashing how much money they're making and doing fancy income reports like I sometimes do. And I think that message gets lost of what you actually want out of your life. So thank you for spreading that message and thank you for helping people be more free in their lives. I appreciate you, and thanks for hanging out with us.

Well, thank you, brother. See you guys.

Purpose to me is not something that is fit. It is not something that needs to be found. It is not something that is outside of you or anything that is predetermined. That is not my opinion. It's my opinion that purpose is something that you more slide into. It's more something that you discover. It's something that changes. It is something that you define. It is something that is fluid throughout whatever circumstances you find yourself in. And one of the things that I did when I was going through a particularly difficult time is I pulled out a journal. And I remember my first ever journal entry. So for those of you who don't have a journaling practice, feel free to steal this one. I pulled out a journal and I said to my. Said to myself, I said, self, I'm lacking purpose right now, so why don't I just make one up? And I said, right now, the purpose of my life is to pick myself up and to start moving again. What that means is developing meaningful relationships, getting myself back into shape, shoring up income streams that have started to fade. And that was my purpose for six months or so. That's the type of purpose that I subscribe to. The purpose of my life is this, right now. And I'm always open to that changing. So when you're struggling with that, when it's struggling with identity or direction or purpose, just pick one and go with that until you have a better one. It's much better than the one that you're struggling with, which is probably not one at all. I want to give special thanks to Nick Unsworth for joining us here on the podcast today. I also want to briefly tease the fact that we are going to be changing some things here on the podcast. Specifically, how they are represented and how they are are presented as we start to navigate over to capitalism. Com, which I will announce in a future episode. So we're planning out some exciting things and I know you will appreciate them. Thanks so much for listening to Freedom Fast Lane. I'll see you on the next one.