#TBT Hal Elrod: What Cancer Taught Me About Money, Business, and Freedom

Getting clear on how I'm showing up for other people and then getting clear on how I can better show up to meet their needs, exceed their expectations, and be the better husband, a better father, a better son, a better brother, a better friend, et cetera. And that has become the number one focus after the cancer of my life and health being part of it so that I can stay alive to continue doing all those things.

Hey, capitalists. In traditional Throwback Thursday fashion, we're re releasing one of our most popular episodes that we've had on capitalism.com enjoy.

Today you're gonna meet someone who I have asked to keynote one of the days at the Capitalism conference. And his name is Hal Elrod. I've asked Hal to speak at one of the days at capcon because Hal is a successful entrepreneur who a year ago was was diagnosed with a form of cancer where he was given a 90% chance of dying. And during that time he became very focused on what was important, very focused on how he needed to change his life and his business. And he said that he had the best year of his life. Today he's on the other side of beating that cancer. And now that he is cancer free and healthy, I'm personally fascinated with what he has learned about life. I'm fascinated with how he looks at money and success, how his life view has changed as a result of staring death in the face. So I asked Hal to come on the show to give a bit of a preview of what he'll be talking about at the Capitalism conference. So in this interview we talk about what he's discovered is the most important thing in life. What we talked about, what he wishes was different about his business and what he's glad he had set up before he got sick. He talks about his views on health and what he thinks is an ideal diet. And he addresses some of the things that entrepreneurs miss in terms of what's really important in life. At the end of the day, we're all in this game because we want more out of life. And so often I know that, I know that I become obsessed with the game rather than what I'm playing this game for. And I got into this because I wanted a better life. And so often I find myself lost in just more and finding more. And there's some benefit to that. There's something that drives me about that, there's something that is fun and playful about that. But also I think that many entrepreneurs are covering up a deep sense of insecurity and sometimes a deep sense of feeling lost. Because we're not quite sure what our lives are supposed to look like. So I've selfishly asked Hal to come on and share his story here on the show. So strap on your seatbelt, put on your baker's pants, and enjoy this chat with Hal Elrod.

Hal, thanks for hanging out with us.

It's Hal Austin. Elrod Ryan Daniel Moran.

My apologies, I didn't realize you were covering the middle name strategy.

I was throwing your middle name. I was like, oh, I, maybe I should start including my middle name.

So is your middle name Austin and you live in Austin?

It is Austin and I live in Austin. It was destiny. Yeah. Yeah.

Well, now you have to change your middle name and every email like I do so you can be Hal Awesome Elrod. Oh, that's right.

That is one of your clever little branding, kind of. Yeah, I like that you do that.

I'm trying to create a sense of mysteriousness around what my name is on a day to day basis.

I like it.

Speaking of mysterious, Hal, I find you particularly mysterious. And the reason is, you know, you and I met about two years ago at a Mastermind with Danny Enie and I was familiar with your books. You wrote the Miracle Morning. You wrote the Miracle Morning for entrepreneurs alongside our friend Cameron Herold. We call him the $100 million man. You have a successful and pretty big podcast following. And that was about all I knew about you. And then one, two, skip a few, your whole life changes. And I want to ask, first of all, how are you? How's your health? Where are you right now?

Yeah, thank you so much. I'm doing great, feeling great. And what you're referring to is one year ago, actually, one year ago yesterday, it was the one year anniversary of me being officially diagnosed with acute lymphoblastic leukemia, which is one of the rarest and most aggressive forms of cancer that one can get. In fact, there was no data on the cancer that I had to the point in terms of survival rate. And the closest survival rate that they could give me was 10%. Wow. So given a 10% chance of surviving, which obviously if you look at the flip side, you have a 90% chance of dying very soon. And when I went into the hospital, my kidneys were failing, my lung was collapsed, I was breathing off of one lung, which I had been doing for about a week and a half, which is what sent me into the hospital in the first place, trying to figure out what that causing, what was causing that. And then my heart was surrounded by fluid to where it was very Close to stopping. In fact, it was an eighth of an inch of fluid. And if it grew by another eighth of an inch, they said my heart wouldn't be able to beat. And they had to stick a needle in my chest and drain the fluid around my heart. And I had to sign a consent saying that I was aware of the fact that there was a very good risk that if my heart beat in the middle of them trying to drain it, it would puncture my heart with the needle and send me into cardiac arrest. And I had to be awake for this whole thing. And so that was what I was doing a year ago. And I will say the short answer is that the last year of my life has been by far the most difficult year of my life. And it has been by far the best year of my life. And I say that because it's in the midst, I believe, of our greatest adversity when we have the. The biggest opportunity is to learn and to grow and really to become better than we've ever been before by proactively taking our adversity head on and learning from it and ending up a better version of ourself on the other side.

So where do you stand now? How is your health now? Are you on the.

Yeah, I guess I forgot to answer that question, which is. So I'm coming to you from the grave. No, that's not a funny joke. Whenever my death jokes, my family doesn't. Why are you stop. Inappropriate humor. All right, so I. I was. About a month ago, I was diagnosed or. I'm sorry, not diagnosed, but. Well, I guess the diagnosis or prognosis was that I was. I came cancer free. I went and got tested, and I don't have any cancer and. Or they don't find it. And the way that I look at this is it's a huge celebration because I definitely, you know, I could have been dead and the odds had me dying. But it's also a. You know, to me, it's just a step in the journey of health and lifelong health and really making sure. I think for all of us. They say one in two people are gonna get cancer. One in two men in our lifetime will get cancer, one in three women. And when you think about those odds, think how scary that is. It's like a zombie movie. It's saying that half of the world's population is going to get this deadly disease that we don't fully understand, we don't have a cure for. We've been promising a cure since, like, the 50s and saying it's just around the corner. Every decade it's just around the corner. I mean it's a pretty scary thing. And so I think all of us, and I'm not big on, I don't want to cause fear for people, I just want to cause awareness for people because I think we all have to be really mindful of what we're putting into our body. And I've read quite a few of the anti cancer books or healing cancer holistically or just did a lot of research on that end to have knowledge so that I can live a cancer free life for the rest of my life.

You had a 10% chance a year ago. You're now on the other side of that. Two years ago you and I were sitting down having a meal at Roaring Fork, one of my favorite restaurants in Austin, Texas, a few blocks from where I live. I would like to go back there and for you to tell me where was your head at there? It wasn't like I wonder if I'm going to get sick soon. It was probably focused on, on other things like work and business and making money and stuff like that. But tell me where your head was at that point.

Yeah, I had bought a couple of glasses, drinking glasses that said the what is it? Living the dream. And I really, that was just a reminder to be grateful every single day that I had been given the abilities and the opportunities to create the life of my dreams. And I was living that life now and especially when I was 20 years old. And you know the story. I won't go into depth on it, but I was head on by a drunk driver when I was 20. I was hit by a second car, crushed the left side of my car into my body. I broke 11 bones. I was clinically dead for six minutes, in a coma for six days and came out of the coma to be told that I would never walk again, that I had permanent brain damage and that I would, you know, I was having to deal with the repercussions of having 11 broken bones. So I had already really gone through a light, you know, a near death experience to put me in a position of a mindset, if you will, of just of gratitude and living life to the fullest. So 20, almost 20 years later, 19 years later, when I was diagnosed with cancer, I was able to take that mindset of you know what, I can't change it. I might as well make the best of it. Which is what I applied when I had my car accident and I applied that now to the cancer. So going into right before The I was diagnosed with cancer when you and I met two years ago. Yeah, focused on business, on, you know, businesses booming, you know, the miracle morning, the book and the movement that's been created. And we've got a documentary that we're going to be showing at my live event event next week in San Diego. We've been working on that for two years. So that was, you know, that was already started and yeah, it was. I also, I watched a documentary probably 15 years ago called Healing Cancer from the Inside out and it made a big impact on me on how to cure cancer holistically, what the risks were in getting it. I bought that movie for all of my family members. And so I was really living an anti cancer lifestyle, if you will. I was eating really clean, mostly a plant based diet. I had. We had really no chemicals in our house. We used natural cleaners and plant based soaps and shampoos. I mean, literally when I got cancer, a friend of mine said it best. He goes, hal, if you got cancer, I'm screwed. That was his response when he first found out I had cancer. And anyway, so yeah, so it was living the dream and being grateful every day and never imagining something like that would happen because of my lifestyle being so proactive for it not to happen. And then when I was diagnosed, there was almost no emotional pain because I've just, I've. I've decided, I've realized that if I can't change something, there's no sense in wishing I could, in feeling sorry for myself, in blaming anyone or anything or, you know, or living in fear. The only thing that makes sense as we move through life is to when we encounter a tragedy or an adversity or a loss is to grieve, you know, whatever process that we need, but not to extend that in a way where it's detrimental to our emotional health, our emotional state, our physical health, you know, and our mental wellbeing and for those around us. And I think that that was a big lesson I learned from both my difficult experiences. The car accident and the cancer is we have the power to accept everything that we can't change, just unconditionally, be at peace with it. Doesn't mean we're happy. I wasn't happy I got cancer. But here's the deal, right? You know, if you imagine, if you hold up both of your hands, everybody watching, hold up your right hand up and your right side of your body, your left hand in front of your left side and if you look at your right hand, imagine that represents positive Emotions, right? Or I'm sorry, your right. Look at the right hand that's got your happiness, love, joy, gratitude. And then on the other side, there's your left hand, which is negative emotions. It's fear, anger, anxiety, regret, you name it. And if you put your hands together in a prayer position, you find that in between positive emotion and negative emotion, through the power of accepting everything that we cannot change, everything that's out of our control, we find peace. Right? And that's where I put the in between the negative and the positive emotion, our hands together in prayer is this state of being that is being at peace, where we can find that we are in control of our emotions. I call it emotional invincibility. Right? Where when you accept everything you can't change, then everything that happens to you has no power over your emotional state. Only you have power over your emotional state. And so that that mindset, I had that going into the cancer. So that when I was diagnosed, I thought, well, I have cancer. Either way, I might as well be the happiest and the most grateful and the most proactive I've ever been while I go through the most scary and the most difficult time in my life. And I think that's a choice that we all have the freedom to make.

So I'm assuming your brain was mostly focused on business two years ago, and then it had to shift. Yes, in some major way in order to get through the last year. Let's fast forward to now. I'm curious on your opinions on health and nutrition since you has that evolved? And then I want to ask, how does that impact your view on business? But first, do you have an opinion on health, lifestyle and cancer? And has that changed before we go into business?

Absolutely. And in that I've spent a lot of time reflecting. I mean, that's probably what I've spent the most time reflecting on during the last year is what really matters most? And am I living in alignment with what matters most to me? And how can I better live in alignment with what matters most to me? And I think if there's anything. Everybody walks away from this podcast and especially the time that I'm going to be spending. I don't know if it's announced yet, but I guess this is the announcement. Right? But speaking at your amazing capitalism conference, it is about what matters most to us. And again, getting clear on what matters most is step one. Step two is evaluating how the way that we're living and how that compares to living in alignment with what matters most to us. And Then getting really clear on any changes that we need to make or habits we need to implement or rituals or routines or whatever that is so that we can better live in alignment with what matters most to us, right? So that's really the focus here. So when it comes. So I'll just, I'll share the two things that matter most. I believe in life. This is my opinion. So you can decide for yourself. Number one is health, and number two, our relationships, right? And the relationship that we have with ourself and the people, well, the people that we love, which it should, you should love yourself. That should be number one. And then, and then the people that you love, your family and that sort of thing. And very often, if we look at how our schedule, you know, in our lifestyle, right, Very often we're not living in alignment with, with what matters most to us. You know, I would have always said my family mattered most. But for most entrepreneurs, you go, well, why do you spend one hour a day with them and 12 hours a day doing other things, right? And the one hour a day you spend with them is at the end of the day when you're exhausted, right? You know, why aren't you giving them the. If they're. They're most important, shouldn't they have the first hour of your day? You know, and now I play with my son first thing in the morning for 30 minutes when he wakes up, you know, because of that. So back to the health piece. My views on health have not changed very much. My cancer was. Because that was one thing is I went to my oncologist when I was diagnosed and I said, doctor, no offense, but I'm not a fan of chemotherapy. It goes against everything I believe in terms of strengthening the body. It's a poison to kill the cancer and it also kills all of your healthy cells. It's killing everything. I said, so I would like to approach this holistically. And his response was, I respect that. But based on your particular cancer and how aggressive and fast acting it is, he said, hal, if youthis isn't something you can approach holistically, you'll be dead in. If we don't administer chemo to you within the next 24 hours. He said, you'll be dead in anywhere from a few days to a week, maybe two at the most. And I didn't like that answer. It rubbed me the wrong way. I thought it was a scare tactic. And so I said, well, give me 24 hours and let me think, do I have 24 hours to sleep on it? And he said yeah, barely, but yes. And so my dad and I went and did a little research and basically realized that okay, this is no joke. In fact one of a gentleman who's in my mastermind, his mother in law got the same cancer that I did or very similar, the closest you could get. And she was diagnosed and five days later she died. And she was also a very healthy person. So essentially what I realized, this form of leukemia that I had, that there was a, I didn't have time to make lifestyle changes in terms of waiting, seeing if that would make a change. Most cancers are tumor based, breast cancer, these other, they're tumor based. And you can shrink a tumor by alkalizing your body. And that was always my knowledge about cancer is if I ever get cancer I'll just go completely alkaline. I'm a healthy eater, but I still have, you know, cashew ice cream in the evening which has sugar in it. I mean, whatever. So I wasn't perfect, you know, but so I thought, okay, well I'll go completely alkaline, I'll eliminate sugar. That was always my cancer plan if I ever got cancer. And then when I realized this cancer doesn't respond to food changes that way, I ended up going in for chemo. So my view on diet, here's the only change that's happened. So it's always been or since I went to a Tony Robbins event in 2000 so 17 years ago, it's been a plant based diet. That's always been, you know, I've had a plant based diet. I was completely vegan for a while, completely raw vegan for a while, vegetarian. And now I eat a little bit of grass fed meat cage free eggs, that sort of thing. But it's still a plant based diet with healthy quality proteins in small amounts, meaning a small amount of meat each day or eggs each day versus you know, a big amount of meat every single meal, um, eliminating carbohydrates. You know, bleached flour is probably one of the sugar, white sugar, bleached flour. Two of the worst things I in my humble non expert opinion that you can put in your body. So those are minimized. So here's the only change that's happened. I'veI'veI've still abide by the plant based diet with quality, small amounts of quality protein. However, a lot of research has proven that the ketogenic diet, there's evidence the ketogenic diet, which is a high fat, moderately high protein and almost, you know, very minimal, if not no carbohydrates so that's what I switched to. So instead of fruit smoothies in the morning, my smoothies are unsweetened almond milk, spinach, raw organic cashews, raw organic walnuts, a little bit of brain octane MCT oil and some plant based stevia sweetened 2 carbohydrate serving plant protein that makes it taste good, you know, vanilla or chocolate. And II use the brand designs for health that I get off of Amazon and that's been my favorite in terms of taste and also in terms of quality organic ingredients and low carbohydrates.

Pretty much that's the same exact breakfast I have. Except there's an avocado in there and Julianne.

Oh, I put that in. I forgot. I put that in too. And what's the other?

And I use Julian Bakery protein powder. So almost the exact same thing I got.

I'm going to Google that right now.

Yeah, so how is that on Amazon?

Julian Bakery.

Yeah, yeah. They need help with their Amazon presence. Since Julian Bakery you should really call me. But I said that publicly before. Still waiting on a phone call.

Is that J U L I A N?

Yeah, that's right. So full disclosure, they have vegan blends and keto blends, but also I typically go with their egg white blend. But anyway, that's a topic for another day. Now fast forward with me because I am an entrepreneur with workaholic tendencies. I think most entrepreneurs get into this game because they're covering something up. Like they're moving away from some pain. And probably one of the challenges we have is we never really. Most entrepreneurs never really live out the life that they desire. Like they move away from a life they didn't desire before with the idea of they're going to move towards something. But most of us kind of get caught in this in between of we've moved away from the 9 to 5 job or even worrying about money, but now we have kind of we get all of our emotional needs met via work. You have had life kick you in the teeth a couple of times and shaken you into a wake up call. And the reason I wanted to have you at the Capitalism conference is because you have been forced to discover that there is more to life than work, production and money. So I ask you selfishly, because I need to hear the answer. What have you discovered about your relationship to work? Or what have you discovered that is important in life? Or how has your view on money and work changed as a result of getting sick and now being better? And I'll add To this. Sorry to have such a long question, but it's okay.

I'll just have to ask you to.

Repeat it four times the whole episode. I do a video on Freedom fast lane on freedomfastlane.com where I proposed the scenario. What if you were diagnosed with cancer and that you are going to die, you would wrap up your affairs, focus on what was important, and then if it went away and you could live the rest of your life in that place, what would that look like? Now I talk about it theoretically. I'm speaking to the man who has gone through it. Would you please tell me the answers to life?

Yeah. I read your blog post and I was so inspired by it. I just did everything I could to get cancer.

This interview set this up a long time ago. No. Yeah, it's terrible. Once again, family would slap me in the back of the head and say, stop joking about that stuff. All right? So that's how I deal with everything. I'd rather use humor than, you know, tears of laughter are more fun to me than tears of sadness. But so I was definitely a workaholic before, you know, beforehand. And like, I think most of us entrepreneurs, if we love our work, doesn't feel like work. You know, it's really being a playaholic that you get paid for. Right. And so I was, you know, I would work 60 hours a week probably. And for me, I wake up at, you know, well, I was waking up at 3:30am seven days a week. I've done that for the last nine years almost every single day unless I, you know, had a late night or something the night before. But for the most part, that was my default. In bed by 9:30, slept six hours up at 3:30. And so I would do 3:30 to 4 as much as just my wake up time. I could brush my teeth, make some coffee, chill out, make a smoothie, whatever. 4 to 5am was my miracle morning time. So that's when I did my miracle morning. And then I started work at 5am and I'd work until 5pm so I'd work those 12 hours, essentially. I don't even know what that is. That was five days a week. So 60 hours of work a week. And so that's where I was working. And then what happened is when I got sick and I was in the hospital and I was basically unable to work for weeks at a time, being in pain or no energy and lethargia and I mean, you name it. What happened is my team that I had built over the last couple years, which Wasn't a big team. I have a business partner, Honore Corder, who's here in Austin and she runs the Miracle Morning book series with me. I have John Berghoff, who runs our live event with me. And then I've got my director of operations, Tiffany. And then, yeah, that was basically my entire team at that point. And Tiffany's kind of was able to step up, replace me. Here's the point is my income this last year stayed. It actually went up from the year before significantly. My revenue went up, my income went up. And what that did is first and foremost it, I mean, did I drop to my knees and thank God and thank the universe for, you know, that I had that in place and going and just imagining if I didn't have a team in place and a business in place, you know, or even you could just call them passive sources of income, right? They're semi passive sources of income. My book, which was every month the Miracle morning, still sold 10,000 copies without me being in the hospital. So that literally paid all of our bills. It paid for our family's bills. And so really the two things that became extraordinarily valuable, which I afterward like after the fact. Right. And that's what you're asking me. What's the hindsight? It's having a team in place that could run honorary. Ran the book series without me for a year. John Berghoff ran our live event last year. I got sick. I was planning on going. I had to cancel my flights the morning of. I was in the hospital after chemo and I was optimistic that I thought I could make it to the event. And I got really sick and I had to cancel my flights the morning of. And I streamed in for like five minutes, all I could muster up the energy for. But I missed our entire event. Well, John Berghoff ran the event on and then Tiffany ran my business. So the point is, right, is that two, I believe two of the most important things you can do as a human being, number one, is create multiple sources of income. That is actually number one. Even if you don't have a team, even if you don't, even if you don't have a, you know, even if you're not a full blown entrepreneur. But if you just set up a side hustle, right? And you, you set up a side income, you write a book, there's a stream of income. You create an online course, there's a stream of income, right? You, I mean, obviously there's, you know, you could start a network marketing business. There's a Stream of income. And so there's all these. I really believe that it is irresponsible for us in an age to rely on one source of income. Because if something happens to you, especially if you have a family, if something happens to you where you cannot provide that source of income, and it might be that you get fired. Right. In today's economy, right when the next crash comes, the next economic crash, which I don't think it's that far away, you know. Right. I mean, we're on a long run up in terms of the economy doing better and better and better, but it's going to crash. And how are we prepared? I think we have to always be prepared for that and setting up. I wrote an article on, what was it, entrepreneur.com on this exact point. You can go read that. It's on multiple streams of income. I think, I think that's been played, you know, that's been, it's been made dirty kind of, you know, this all multiple streams of income get rich quick. I think they kind of, I think there's a bad rap there. But if you actually stop and you, you look at the big picture and you go, okay, why would I not have multiple sources of income to ensure my financial security? So that if one of my sources of income dried up or went away completely suddenly, I'd have other areas that would A, support me, but B, that I can now transition and put all my energy into. Right. If my, you know, speaking career dried up, then I would focus more on the coaching or if the coaching, I'd have the live events, you know, I'd focus more on marketing my books, you know, so not to mention each book is a stream of income. So it's like there's, you know, 10 books out there. So I just, I cannot stress, I can't make it a strong enough case for why we should all have in our goals every single year to add a stream of income. It doesn't mean you have to add a new one every, every year. It could be just adding one. If all you had is two streams of income that were really strong, I think that that's a starting place. From there you could, you can, you can, you know, you can add more, but I just, I can't stress that enough. And then the second part was having the team in place. But again, that to me is secondary. If I had no team, in fact, let's say I had no team, but I still had the miracle morning books out there. Those would have supported our family. And granted, not everyone, you can't just write a book and that's going to support your family. I mean, I had a rare kind of book that took off a little bit. But the bottom line is having multiple sources of income to provide true financial security for you and, or your family, I think is one of, if not the most important things for all of us to focus on. Beyond, of course, the time with family and that sort of thing.

Great. So obviously I agree with you, at least on having some sort of an income stream that is within your control.

What about the balance of what you focus on? Because my guess is that you've seen what's important, right? Like you've seen that everything could be taken away from you and all of this business stuff to. Doesn't matter. And the thing that I'm curious about, when you speak in December in front of a group of incredibly successful capitalists, what will you know that they don't? And what I mean by that is all of us are chasing success or more success. You've had success and then you had life stare you in the face. How has your perspective of success changed now that you've stared death in the face?

Yeah, success is freedom, right. I think that you'd probably agree with that based on your domain, but. Right. Success is freedom. And for, you know, the way I would define it is the freedom to do what you love with the people that you love. Right. Period. That to me is success. Or that's. That's the end game now. There's the front end game is, well, how do you get there? It's success by adding value for people that you love but you may have never met before. Right. Meaning that your clients, your prospects, the world, you know, that that old Zig Ziglar quote I think is so true, is the more value that you add, or, I'm sorry, you know, everything you want in life, if you help enough other people get what they want. But the end game is about. It's about the people that you love. What. So I'll give you some example, real tangible examples. When I got out of the hospital after my very last chemo treatment and I was in, I think it was about nine months of chemo that I was in the hospital every three weeks for four to five days at a time. And then I was sleeping it off for a week or two, throwing up in a trash can at an apartment right next door to the hospital, which was a few hours from my house. The. Right. When I got home, it was a Saturday morning and I was down to, I mean, I'm 6ft tall. I was 177 pounds before the cancer. So 6ft tall, 177. I got down to 127 during the cancer. Wow. So I lost 50 pounds, you know, as much as 50 pounds. And so I was, I was, you know, and I, of course, lost every hair on my body. Every hair on my body. And so I was, I was. I actually, I would, you know, my inappropriate jokes. I used to joke that, you know, this is. If my life had taken a fourth and I had become a meth addict, this is what I would have looked like. Like, you know, I was. I mean, I looked like at me, at the. At the, you know, void of all nutrients and, you know, fat and all of that. Anyway, so the. My son comes downstairs, though, and I didn't have a lot of energy, but I, you know, I just. It was. It was so important to me being home. I said, I said, halston, he's five years old. He was four at the time. I said, buddy, we can do anything you want today. We can go anywhere in Austin. I go, we can't. We can't fly anywhere. We could drive anywhere that you want. I said, we could go to the bowling alley, the arcade, we could do laser tag. We go to the park, we can go out to eat. We can do whatever you want, buddy. Today it's your special day. And I said, what do you want to do? He said, I want to go play in the playroom. And I said, you sure? What do you want to play? He said, I want to play with my superheroes. And I said, okay. I said, that's great. I said, are you sure, though? I said, we could do member. We could do anything. And I just kind of repeated all the cool things I had just thrown out there, right, that we don't normally do. And he goes, I just want to play in the playroom. And in that moment, I realized that that means more to my son. Playing with me in the playroom is. It means more to him than anything. That's his favorite thing to do. When I gave him the option to do anything, that's what he could do. Talk about low hanging fruit. How hard is it to play with my kid in the playroom, right? But like I said, whenever I did that, it was at the end of the day when I was exhausted and I wasn't fully present. My two fingers might have been holding up the little. The Iron man or the Spider man or the Superman and talking in his monotone voice, right? But my spirit wasn't there, it was just, I was so tired, right? I was faking it. I was faking playing, right? It'd be like on being on a date and someone going, you're really uninterested in this, aren't you? You know what I mean? I was trying to fake, I was trying to pull one over on my kid. Like I was really being a dad when I wasn't. And so in that moment when he said that, I said, halston, we're going to go play with your figurines. But hold on, let me ask you a question. Do you want to do that every single day for 30 minutes before you go to school? And he was like, oh my gosh, that's a dream come true type of thing, you know. And so I said, give me one second. And I put it in my schedule with, you know, three alerts during the morning. And so now every Single day from 7 7:45 to 8:15am My son and I play this morning we played superheroes, we shot nerf guns yesterday we played two board games and then my dog. And it's, it's, it's beautiful, right? And it also ensures that as an entrepreneur, right, I'm giving him the best of me. When I'm at a peak, in a peak state first thing in the morning and I'm fully engaged and I get down to him, I think in my head, what's he thinking about these action figures right now? What is his mind space where, right? And I'll even ask him sometimes to describe what you're feeling and thinking. And I try to get as, as I try to be as much of a five year old as I can possibly be for the entire 30 minutes that I'm playing with him. I'm silly, I'm goofy, you name it. And our relationship has, has, it's so strong as a result of that. And when I was gone and I'd come home, he would really almost not cower away from me, but he would run to my wife because she was a single mom for the last year. You know, 80% of the time she was a single mom.

I was not. I couldn't be there mentally, physically, emotionally, I couldn't be there. And then my daughter, she goes to school early so when she get, when I get off work at 5pm she has an alarm set with, on her alarm clock every day and she's 8 years old and she comes in, dad, time to be off work. But because I've got five alarms set before that, I'm, I try to Ensure that I am almost always ready to walk out the door or I'm waiting for. A lot of times I just surprise her by standing there when she opens the door. Unlike it used to be. Wait, sweetie, 15 more minutes, okay? Daddy's gonna finish this. And, and same thing with the morning. It was 15 more minutes. It was, let me turn on a cartoon for you. It was, let me be a bullshit dad. That, that, that says you're the most important thing to me. But, but my. I don't. Sorry. Getting choked up, but I. But I don't. But I'm not living that way. And I'm trying to fake. I'm trying to fake it, you know, And I'd probably never make it if I hadn't really committed to step up and be the dad that you guys, you know, deserve. And my other, other thing that I do is I have a rule now that I have to read 10 pages out of a parenting book every single day before I'm allowed to open a business book. And that's been a game changer as well. And.

For me, this is like a wake up call because there's like this sense of, I know you're right. And I don't know how to change. Like, I don't know how to have the same shift that you had, except intellectually, to develop different habits. And I can do that. But you had a must. You were forced to change. What would you tell to me and to the tens of thousands of entrepreneurs who follow and are in kind of the same spot?

Yeah, absolutely. Great question.

I mean, to put anything in action. So I would encourage you to commit for 30 days to do one of the things that I've shared or whatever comes up for you.

Right.

There's a lot of research out there, obviously, on how long it takes to change a habit. The most popular is probably 21 days, which was, I believe that was originated in Maxwell Malt's book Psycho Cybernetics decades ago. And their research showed that 21 days is how long it took to change a habit, implement a new habit. Most recently, the book the One Thing by Jay Papasan and Gary Keller says, I think 68 days or 67 days, based on Harvard research. Well, so when I wrote the Miracle Morning, I went on a, you know, I went deep into like, okay, what I, you know, if people are going to make a change, the number one change, they've got to change their habit of hitting the snooze button and, you know, not waking up early. And so, so I'll just here's a quick version of what I think is the most effective of everything I've read and everything I've studied. The most effective way to change any habit, implement or get rid of a, you know, implement a new one, a good one, or get rid of a bad one. And so I always take a 30 day approach. And there's three 10 day phases. This was largely inspired by Eben Pagan, some of what I learned from Eben Pagan's training. And it was the first 10 days. So I call this. There's three 10 day phases in those 30 days. The first phase, days one through 10 is unbearable. Days 11 through 20 is uncomfortable. And days 21, 30 is the unstoppable phase. So unbearable, uncomfortable, unstoppable. When you try a new habit, sometimes the first few days don't feel unbearable because you're so excited. That can often be the case. But very often it's, you know, very day one, you're like, I don't want to quit smoking. This is gonna be the hardest thing ever done in my life. Or, I don't want to start eating vegetables. They taste disgusting to me. Or, you know, whatever it is, right? Or I don't want to exercise. I'm in such terrible shape, you know, so those first 10 days can often feel unbearable. Or I, I can't imagine waking up early. I love hitting the snooze button five times, you know, so those first 10 days can feel unbearable. But the question is, if you're making a change that is, that is going to be a game changer for you, for your family, for the rest of your life, can you, can you bear anything for 10 days? And of course the answer is yes, if I know it's going to be a long term, very substantial, significant benefit. I can do anything for 10 days, even if it's unbearable, right? So the second 10 days are uncomfortable. And that doesn't sound fun. But it's basically where you're kind of in the transition phase, where you're like, okay, it's not unbearable anymore. Like, I'm kind of getting the hang of it, but I'd still rather do the old habit or not, you know, I'd rather do the old thing, not do the new thing. It's easier not to than it is to, right? It's easier to stick with my old way. I'm still not quite there yet, but it's not unbearable anymore. And when it's unbearable, it's like every fiber of your being is defying. You know, it's like, I hate this, the middle days, is kind of like, I'm not enjoying this. When I was learning to run, for example, I hated running, but I committed to run a 52 mile mile ultramarathon to raise money for the Front Row foundation, which is a big charity I support. And so once I committed publicly, like, I had to do it, the first 10 days, I hated it. The second 10 days, I didn't like it, but I didn't hate it. I just kind of was like, I guess I'm gonna go for a run today. I said I would. I committed. Okay. But the final 10 days is where the magic happens. Days 21 through 30 is what I call the unstoppable phase. And the reason I call it that is because it's where somewhere during those 10 days and everybody's different. It could be day 18 for you. It might be 22, 29, 31. Right. It's. You know, there's not an exact science. Although I do believe so much in the mind, body, connection that I believe if you tell yourself that you're gonna become unstoppable on day 21, and you make that decision before you go to bed and when you. You reinforce it when you wake up, I do believe that you're in charge of that. Right. But day 21 to 30 is the reason I call it the unstoppable phase. Ryan, is that. But you'll go to do the new habit, and it will be almost effortless. So for me, for example, it was like day 23. I was lacing on my running shoes, and I wasn't even thinking about it. I went out, I grabbed my ipod, I went out the front door, and I stopped right before I got to the pavement, the sidewalk, to run. I stopped and I went, whoa. There was no resistance this morning. There was no. I didn't have to come overcome anything. That was effortless. And, Ryan, here's the rhetorical question I would ask. Does it take effort? Once something's become effortless, does it take effort to do it? It's like, well, no, of course not. You now have become unstoppable because that new habit that 20 days ago was unbearable, unthinkable, terrifying for you is now becoming part of your identity and part of who you are. So don't change everything at once. Take one thing that you could do. So first, identify. Let's go back to what I talked about earlier in the beginning. Number one, identify what matters most to you. Number two, evaluate how you're living and in relation to living in full alignment with what matters most to you? And then number three, what's one thing that you can commit to doing for the next 30 days? Implementing the three 10 day phases, the unbearable to unstoppable strategy. What's one thing you can do in the next 30 days that will become a permanent fixture in your identity and your way of being that will add value in the area of your life that matters most? And maybe it is health for you. Maybe you don't have a family yet, or maybe it's. Maybe you can't pick one because you go like, I gotta get my health in order while I get my family life in order or whatever. So I'm not gonna say it can't be two things, but less is definitely more. And there's, you know, there's tons of research that shows that the less we commit to trying to change, the higher our success rate in making lasting changes.

Hal, I want you to address what it is like to be on your deathbed and what you would tell your younger self for those who are listening. Because I, you know, I wanted to have you here at the capitalism conference to give some perspective of life beyond work and money. And we are all working towards something. We are all working toward.

Something that drives us. And I want you to address, when you're on your deathbed, what do you think about what was important to you? And now that you're on the other side of it, what is it like to be fully present in that?

Yeah, I'll give kind of two different answers to that. Two different perspectives. One is family became so important. And I mean, and I, based on everything I've shared so far today and my philosophies on accepting everything out of your control so you can be kind of emotionally invincible and be at peace with even the most difficult times in your life, that was really easy for me. The only time I had a negative mindset in the cancer journey was when I was in a lot of physical pain. Because I don't care who you are, physical pain kind of, there's not that overtakes. You have to be a real master, real ninja to smile in the midst of real, intense physical pain. But other than that, I was living what I've been teaching for the last 20 years. But the thought of my family growing up without me, that was terrifying. That was just horrific for me, just to think my kids wouldn't have me and how hard that would be on them, even on my mom and my dad and my sister and my wife. So my family losing how hard it was on Them that for me was really. I became really present to how much I mean to other people. That's what I'm trying to say is I became really present how much I mean to other people. And what that shifted was, you know what? I need to spend more time with my mom and dad. I need to call them every single week, no matter what. I need to bring them on our vacations. They're not going to be around that long. My friends are going to be around for as long as I am. My family will be around. My wife's around as long as I am. My kids are around even longer. But. But the people my mom, my dad, my grandparents like, you know, they're not. They're not gonna be around as long. And so it really, you know, now I call my parents every week, whereas before, I'd call them randomly, you know, once a month, maybe, whenever, you know. And I love my parents. I have a great relationship, but I just. I don't have the need where I need to talk to them, to feel loved by them or to love them. You know, it's like. So it can be out of sight, out of mind. So for me, it was really looking. Looking through the eyes of other people and how I was impacting them and then stepping up to really be better, be a better. Be better in every role that I play in my life. So be better as an entrepreneur. And again, I think that was the area that I focused on because that was the area. That was the area I really thrived in, was I was always, how can I change the world? How can I add value for the world? And yeah, there were conversations my wife and I have had over the last 10 years. Hey, hello. Why don't you add value for me first or for the kid? Like you're trying to change the world, but, like, you forget about us, you know, so really getting present to how I was showing up for the people in my life that matter the most. And really, on paper, I mean, on paper, you know, in the form of affirmations that I read every day that remind me what matters most and what I'm committed to doing to what you know, to be live in alignment with what matters most. By the way, on a side note, that is how I define affirmations. I think affirmations, people confuse them. They have a bad rap. They think they're cheesy because you'd say I am blank, whatever that is. No, no, no. I just view affirmations as reminders of what matters most to you and what you're committed to doing to live in alignment with what matters most. When you read affirmations every day, they keep you focused and on track to live in alignment with what matters most. So everything we're talking about right now wasn't just things I thought about. It was things I wrote down and then I review every single day so I'm reminded to check in with my family. One of my affirmations is that my number one mission in my marriage is to make my wife's life amazing every single day, either in small or grandiose ways, whether it's doing the dishes or putting the kids to bed because she's tired or booking a vacation or taking her to, you know, the place of her dreams because so what? In whatever way I can make my wife's life amazing. That's my focus every day. And also I affirm and remind myself that it is unconditional regardless of how she treats me that day. And I go as far as to say, if she's rude to me today, I will try even harder to make my wife's life amazing because she's obviously going through some tough, she's tired, she's this. Whatever she is, right? So getting clear on how I'm showing up for other people and then getting clear on how I can better show up to meet their needs, exceed their expectations and be the better husband, a better father, a better son, a better brother, a better friend, et cetera. And that has become the number one focus after the cancer of my life and health, being part of it so that I can stay alive to continue doing all those things.

Hal, that is fricking beautiful if I can say so myself. I feel very honored and privileged to to share your insights with my audience and I just want to say publicly, thank you.

Ditto, brother. I really appreciate everything. Ryan.

This hour that I spent with Hal inspired me to evaluate a couple changes that I want to make in my life in terms of my health and how I structure my time and also just remembering to be grateful. I try to be grateful for everything. I spend in morning time every day practicing gratitude and just enjoying all the little things, all the little things that my little two year old girl does, all of the things that I'm thankful for throughout the day. And this really has just inspired me to take it that much more, to just be that much more thankful. How I talked about habits in today's episode and I want to remind you that I practice a habit called Tribe 5 T R I B E and it is finding an area to Practice every day in time, relationships, income, body and expansion. I'd highly encourage you to check out the podcast about Tribe 5. I've also talked about it fairly publicly at freedomfasting.com, but just give a Google to Tribe 5 and my name and some good stuff will come up. I'd encourage you to give that a try for 30 days. It will both help you grow in certain areas and it will help you maintain those areas that you don't necessarily need to change, but you need to constantly keep going. If you're happy with your marriage, this will continue to keep your marriage happy. It will also give you a way to evaluate where you are in all those five areas. It's time, relationships, income, body and expansion. And you can find out more by looking up Tribe five. Just put it in the Google machines. I know that you got something out of today with Hal. I know I took it almost as a wake up call and I think it's going to be that much more impactful in person. So I would encourage you to join Hal and myself in Austin, Texas at the capitalism conference at TheCapitalismConference.com it's this December 7th, 8th and 9th and I would love to shake your hand and to connect with you in person then, as always, I appreciate what you're doing in the world. I really admire that you are on a quest for more that you desire the most life that you can possibly squeeze out of this experience, that you are always driven for something greater to see how far you can go. And I think it's people like you that ultimately make the biggest impact on the world. So I honor you, I appreciate you and I hope to meet you this December. Thanks for listening and I'll see you guys in the next episode.

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