The Identity Transformation That Took Me From $50K Therapist to Seven-Figure CEO [Ep 61]

If you have been thinking about starting a coaching business but you're overwhelmed by where to begin, this is your sign. I am hosting something I've never done before. It's called the Therapist to Coach Startup School and it is designed to help you bridge the gap between therapy and coaching, ethically and profitably, and all with total alignment. We kick off Monday, September 9th, and over five days, I'm going to walk you through exactly how to pick a niche, build a coaching offer, start attracting your first clients, and even if you're starting from scratch, even if you're nervous, even if you're wondering if you're expert enough, you just need to show up. I'm going to guide you from there. Head to the link in the show notes to register for only 27 and I will see you inside. Welcome to the Thriving Therapeneur podcast. The show for ambitious therapists who are ready to unapologetically make more money, scale their impact and build their dream coaching business. I'm Carly Hill, therapist turned coach turned CEO of a seven figure online business. I created the Thriving Therapreneur podcast because I'm obsessed with helping big hearted therapists outgrow the office and build successful and sustainable online businesses. So if you are wondering how you can continue to make an impact without sacrificing the life you love, welcome Therapreneur. This is exactly the place for you. Think of it like the business school we never had. I am so excited to dive in with you. Let's get started. Welcome back to the show, my friends. I'm your host card, Carly Hill and today we're going a bit deep. We're going to talk about the ripple effect. We're going to talk about boldly declaring your fullest potential. Because the ripple effect is so powerful, we don't need more people saying, well, like I guess I'll do this. No, we need more people boldly declaring, I am here to to allow my fullest potential to move through me. I am here to do the exact work I was put on this earth to do. And that starts with believing, truly believing, that your life, your mind, your talents, your body, your whole being is worthy of receiving at the highest possible level. It starts with knowing you are worthy of serving at the highest possible level, therefore, receiving at the highest possible level. So I want to ask you, and I want you to self reflect, what does the most expanded version of you look like? How does that version lead? How does that version of you speak and walk and carry themselves through the world? This episode was Inspired by a client of mine who asked me such a powerful question and she said, carly, what is the mindset? I need to be a millionaire. I have a goal. I wrote myself a check. It sits on my desk just like you told me to do, just like you did. But I feel like I'm missing something and this is what I have to say to that. Everything that I'm going to share in this episode today. And if you're new to my world or this is maybe the first time you're listening to my podcast, I want to welcome you with open arms. This show is for ambitious people who want to go all in for the wellness professionals, for the therapist. I am a therapist by trade myself. And if you want to go all in, in business and in life, I help. Big hearted, I call them agents of change. Like big hearted agents of change, high achieving entrepreneurs grow their business to match their biggest vision, to create lasting wealth, to leave a legacy they're proud of. So if that's you and you're wondering how can I scale my business to multi six figures or seven figures while still living fully and managing everything else on my plate, then you're in the exact right place today. Like I said, we're going deep. We're talking about identity. We're talking about the root of everything. Because here's the truth. You can stack all the right strategies on top of a business. The perfect offers, the smart pricing. You have a very strong product suite. You have great marketing, amazing messaging, like cool. Check, check, check, check, check. But if there is a crack in the foundation, none of it holds. None of it holds. And your identity is the foundation. The actual dictionary definition of identity, I looked it up right before I came on. It's the fact of being who or what a person is. The fact of being who or what a person is. And it sounds really simple, but it's anything but. The fact of being who or what a person is. Who are you? How do you see yourself? How do you describe yourself to the world? More importantly, how much of that is authentically yours versus something you inherited, something you absorbed, probably subconsciously, you just agreed to it along the way. You absorbed it, you inherited it. Some identities we adopt from our family or culture. Others we create ourselves. But often it's based on earlier versions of us that is outdated. We've outgrown those identities, yet we still cling to them. So an example from my own life. For years, one of my core identities was I'm a therapist in community mental health. I work for someone else. I'M a therapist in a 9 to 5 brick and mortar practice. I'm a therapist who earns around $50,000 a year. I love my clients. I valued being of service. I enjoyed the work. But I also quietly believed that this was acceptable for me. This was just the amount I could earn. Anything beyond this was out of reach and not for people like me. It wasn't really just a job description. It was an entire identity about what was permissible for me financially, what was enough, and what I thought I was worth. I wasn't identifying as someone who could be an entrepreneur. And here's the kicker. I carried that identity for long after I left those roles. When I did start my business and I was an entrepreneur, I didn't see myself as a businesswoman. I was still identifying with the old version of me who works for someone else. I was still identifying with the old version of me who has this cap on her income. And we all do this to some degree. We hold onto labels and archetypes and glass ceilings, even if we've outlived their relevance. And think about these identities even in the collective imagination. The starving artist, the burnt out nonprofit worker, the broke but pure barefoot yoga teacher, you've heard them. There are cultural archetypes that suggest basically, if you're devoted to meaningful work, you must struggle financially. If you're creative, you should live on the edge of survival. If you're academic, you'll be fueled by coffee and instant noodles while your bank account stays empty. It's pretty fucked up if you think about it. And no wonder why us therapists have subconsciously in our head, we're not supposed to want to make money. We're told that the underlying belief is, is you can only have one thing you want, whether that be impact, creativity, purpose. If you sacrifice another, such as stability, wealth and ease. And it doesn't have to be either or, it doesn't have to be one over the other. It can be both. And you can be impactful, purposeful, and be wildly creative and have a shit ton of wealth. Ease, stability, it's all available to you. Some of our identities are shaped in childhood too. I'll never forget a conversation with my dad recently. I mean, this has come up multiple times, but just the other weekend actually with my dad, it was this conversation about me being the breadwinner in my family. And he said to me, we need to be careful with our successes, hinting that it might emasculate my husband, Chad. Now, Chad is very much the head of our household. If anything, my Role as the primary earner has been a huge relief for him. Not a threat, but my dad's comment came from old conditioning and outdated gender norms. Because the matter of fact is, my dad means well. He's my number one fan. He's supported me so, so much love him dearly, but I'm kind of psychoanalyzing his old conditioning and his outdated gender norms and this helped me not take it personally. I was more so just analyzing the conversation because the truth is, I was raised in an environment where you didn't flaunt success. You stayed modest, so no one felt less than and even though I wanted to share my revenue online, especially to show other therapists what was possible, I was absolutely terrified to do it. Deep down, I feared that if I openly celebrated my success, my family would see me differently, maybe even resent me. It might make people feel bad about where they were, that it might leave me alone. It was completely irrational, but it was this fear of abandonment. It was very real in my subconscious. I went to therapy to process that fear. I had to work on rewriting those beliefs to see that sharing my wins wasn't about gloating. It was just about giving other people permission to win too. I wanted to instill that belief and show them I'm proof this is possible. My clients are proof that this is possible. And even so, the first time I posted about it, I literally threw my phone across the room like I had just texted, like a high school crush. I kid you not, that's how nervous I was. So now it's much easier. I've moved past that fear, but it's proof that these identity stories run very deep in our bones. Until we address them, they can keep us from showing up fully. These old stories, whether from family culture or our own past, they aren't permanent. They're outdated. They're old operating systems running in the background, and we have to consciously choose to uninstall them. Hey there. Did you know we give away one of our incredible digital products every single week? All you have to do is leave a review for the show, then submit proof using the link in the show notes and you'll be entered to win. Prizes include amazing resources like our passive income course, the license protection bundle, top business trainings, my bestselling book, and so much more. It's super simple and your review helps us reach more listeners just like you. So take a moment to share your thoughts. Enter to win and maybe you'll be our next winner. Think about it like an iceberg above the water. People can see your current role. You're an entrepreneur, you're a creator, you're a leader, you're a therapist. Whatever title you go by beneath the service is that 7/8 of the iceberg, which is the beliefs, the labels, what we inherit, the inherited limitations, the inherited and adapted identities that dictate what you think is possible, what you think is quote, unquote, okay to receive, and how safe you feel being fully expressed. We also form identities from relationships in social groups. In order to fit in with this friend group, I must play small if you want to stay connected to this community. I can't surpass them financially or professionally. If I outgrow who they've always known me to be, I risk losing them. I was the party girl, hot mess in college. I am opposite of that now. Being a very successful businesswoman. I had to outgrow some of my friends and I had to risk losing them. But this is what we have to do. These unwritten agreements shape how we show up, often without us realizing it. And here's the big question. If belonging means staying in a smaller version of you, is it really belonging? Like what? Right? Is it really even belonging? If belonging means staying small? Because when you allow yourself to embody a bigger identity, you're forced to rethink what belonging means. And that can feel really risky. But is the risk worth it? Sometimes it's not even other people holding us back. It's our story about how they'll react when we outgrow them or not even when we outgrow them. Really, how they'll react when I mean outgrow them as like I was referring to kind of maybe outgrowing some friend groups, but how they'll react when you share the true you like. That's what I was afraid of. How my friends and family would react if I were to share my true success. This is what holds us back. We think people care more than they do. We imagine judgment and disapproval and rejection when in reality, they might actually cheer us on and be our number one fan. But until we examine that story, it's going to keep us playing small. This shows up in business all the time. Maybe you hold back from posting bold, authentic content online because you think my friends or family, they're going to think I've changed. My therapist friends are going to judge me. Or you're going to avoid celebrating a big win because you fear it's going to make other people uncomfortable. I listened to a podcast episode from Mel Robbins. Love our girl Mel. It was about how Social media is not for your friends, and it's so true. Use it in a business sense. Imagine that no friends or family was going to see whatever you were going to air out. And if certain relationships require you to dim your light, you have to ask, is it worth sacrificing your fullest expression just to maintain them? That was a question I had to ask myself. If the relationship is going to require you to dim your light, is it worth sacrificing your fullest expression just to maintain those relationships? Playing small might have felt like the safe, loving or like right thing to do, the good girl thing to do. But in reality, stepping into your fullest expression is one of the most powerful acts of self trust you can take. It's not about puffing yourself up or performing some like inflated version of you. It's really just about peeling away the old layers, the outdated stories, the collective fears, the inherited limitations, and allowing your essence to lead fully, authentically. It would feel so good to do that, wouldn't it? It does. I can tell you from experience it is liberating. So I want you to ask yourself, if I belonged completely to myself, how would I speak? How would I lead? How would I earn? How would I show up every damn day? Name it, claim it, say the number, even if it scares you. It's not really about the number anyways. It's about the energy you're willing to hold. Your gifts, whether they're in leadership, problem solving, creativity, healing, innovation. They are not meant to be hidden away. You didn't get them to bury under someone else's comfort zone. And when you let your biggest self be the CEO of your life and work, everything is going to change for you in your personal life and your professional life. Because when you belong to yourself first, you can reclaim that identity. Every space becomes safe, and when you shine, you give others permission to do the same. It's contagious. So just let this be your invitation to set down the old belief that staying small keeps you safe or keeps you loved. Pick up the truth that your bigness. Is that even a word? Your bigness, your full, unfiltered expression, is service. Lead with service. Lead with that and just watch the ripple effect unfold. My love is with you. I'm going to leave you with that mic drop. I'll see you in the next episode. Thank you so much for listening to the thriving Therapy podcast. I hope that this episode has inspired you to reduce burnout, work smarter, and see the freedom potential you have as a therapist. We would love to have you inside the Therapist to Coach Accelerator Facebook group where we have live trainings and cheat sheets on all things marketing, sales and adding coaching ethically and legally. I am here cheering you on and I'll see you around.