Why Nervous System Regulation Is the Missing Piece to Overflow [Ep 55]

Welcome to the Thriving therapyneur podcast. The show for ambitious therapists who are ready to unapologetically make more money, scale their impact and build their dream coaching business. I'm Carly Hill, therapist turned coach turned CEO of a seven figure online business. I created the Thriving Therapeutic podcast because I'm obsessed with helping big hearted therapists outgrow the office and build successful and sustainable online businesses. So if you are wondering how you can continue to make an impact without sacrificing the life you love. Welcome therapreneur. This is exactly the place for you. Think of it like the business school we never had. I am so excited to dive in with you. Let's get started. Welcome back to the show. Today's episode is going to light a fire in your soul, especially if you've been doing all the things in your business, but something still feels off. You've got the strategy, you've done the courses, you've hired the coaches, you've hired the mentors, but this breakthrough is still lost. You're still waiting for the breakthrough. Something is not clicking the way it should. So this episode is about the missing piece. And it's not more content creation, it's not strategy, it's not another funnel, it's not another journal prompt. We are going much deeper into the energetics and the root of overflow, the root of expansion and building wealth in a way that actually feels sustainable. So what is the missing piece to actually building wealth? We are going there today. If you have been feeling stuck, get ready. Today's conversation might just change everything. I want to start by just mentioning that a lot of people come into this space wanting to be that generational change maker in their family. They want to retire their husband, they want to leave a legacy. And yet they keep hitting the same walls over and over again. It's the burnout, it's the inconsistency. It's doing everything right but not seeing the results. I hear it all the time. And the truth is, the people I meet, they're not lacking drive. They are very motivated, but they're lacking integration. And they've built their business and they have the right strategy. Maybe they're missing a few puzzle pieces, but for the most part, they've hired the mentors. They're doing the damn thing. But what is missing is their nervous system has not yet caught up. They also have scarcity loops. They also have unresolved fear. So today I want to offer a different conversation. It's one that brings the human back into how you're doing business, it's acknowledging your energy, your nervous system. Like I said, we're going into the energetics. We have to talk about your belief structure because this is just as important as your pricing, your offers, your content calendar. We have to go here. We have to go deeper, because I promise you, this is the missing piece to unlocking abundance and overflow and wealth into your life. So what's really happening when the results don't match the effort? It's the nervous system connection. It's off. You've probably heard people say, like, mindset is everything. Mindset is everything. I believe it's 80% of business. Okay, you do have to have strategy, and that's 20%. But majority of your business success does come down to mindset. But that's not even the whole picture. Like, mindset does not sum it up enough. What we're really dealing with is nervous system regulation. What does that mean? It means can your body hold the overflow that you say you want? Can your body hold the overflow? Do you have the capacity for it? Can you actually stay grounded when the sales go up? Can you actually stay grounded when they don't? Because you will have inconsistent months and it will go up and down, especially in the foundational stages of your business. And your business is a mirror. It reflects not just what you do, but who you are being who you are as a person. If you constantly feel pressure to perform, if every launch feels like a sprint, that you're barely surviving, if clients aren't signing up and then you're panicking, or they do sign up and then you're panicking about delivering. Like, this is not a strategy problem. It's a capacity problem. Hey there. Did you know we give away one of our incredible digital products every. Every single week? All you have to do is leave a review for the show, then submit proof using the link in the show notes, and you'll be entered to win. Prizes include amazing resources like our passive income course, the license protection bundle, top business trainings, my bestselling book, and so much more. It's super simple. And your review helps us reach more listeners just like you. So take a moment to share your thoughts, enter to win, and maybe you'll be our next winner. You are not able to hold the overflow. Your nervous system has not yet caught up. It hasn't connected yet with where you want to go. It's a capacity problem. An unregulated nervous system is going to create a glass ceiling for you. So you may have the desire to have all of this abundance and overflow and wealth. But if your body does not feel safe to receive, subconsciously you're going to repel subconsciously, you're going to self sabotage the very things that you say you want. You're going to self sabotage. I know that's not what you want to hear, but this is the hard truth. So many women that I work with are brilliant. They are experts in their field, they are incredible therapists. But they have been operating in survival mode for so long, they don't even recognize what full peace feels like. And that chaos is going to bleed into your business. We have to have safety. Safety is part of the strategy. When we think strategy, we just think about funnels and marketing and social media and our messaging. But safety is part of the strategy. This is the nervous system regulation strategy. One of the biggest truths I've learned is regulation is part of the plan. Overflow is the result. You're not going to have overflow and abundance if you can't feel safe in your business, if you can't regulate your nervous system. So safety is the strategy, regulation is the plan, and then overflow is the result. It works like that. We've been taught in business that you need to do, do, do, do, do more in order to earn more. But the answer is sometimes just about doing less. But feel safe doing it, because safety is the strategy. So it looks like selling without over explaining yourself, just holding that confidence and conviction. It looks like showing up without a detailed seven post carousel and just speaking from the heart again with that confidence and conviction. It looks like letting your identity be seen without having to over explain and give value, value, value all the time. It's about sharing your story. Let your identity be seen. Energy sells, story sells the algorithm. Let it be your energetics. Let that come through. It's like internal congruence. What creates overflow isn't a longer to do list. You don't have to do, do, do, do, just do a few things but feel really safe and feel really good doing it. That's what I mean by internal congruence. Because when your nervous system feels safe, your capacity is going to increase. And that's what we're trying to do here. I want you to get to the place where you can hold the overflow. If your capacity increases, you're going to rise up, you're going to hold duality better, you're going to move through fear quicker, you're going to stop self sabotaging, you're going to stop abandoning yourself when things get quiet. This is when you become an energetic match for everything that you want to call in. That's quite literally how the law of attraction works. Everything works through resonance. You have to become that energetic match. And if you continue operating in survival, there is going to be a cost, there's going to be a negative consequence. If you're constantly in that, well, how do I get to this overflow? How do I get to this abundance? And you're in this how loop. And you're constantly chasing answers outside yourself. How do I implement this strategy? And you're just always looking for the next strategy in the shiny object syndrome. But you're not going inwards. You're just continuing to chase the answers outside yourself. It's probably because your nervous system is seeking certainty. It wants to know the outcome before it risks taking that action. But leadership doesn't work that way. I would say being the leader of your business means embracing and tolerating the unknown. We have to be willing to try and step out of our comfort zone. It means learning to ride the waves without making it mean something about your worth. Let that sink in for a second. That is what real regulation is. Because like I said, leadership doesn't work that way. You have to go within when you're dysregulated, you're going to discount your offers even when you don't want to. You're going to avoid launching. You're going to put things off even though you say you're ready. You're going to numb out on social media because it's too much of a chore. Instead of showing up, then you're not going to show up consistently, and then you're going to want to throw the towel in because you know you have to be consistent. And if you weren't consistent, well, I already just ruined it. It's not even worth it. It's this whole rabbit hole. I see it all the time. This isn't a moral failing. This is just biology. We're talking about nervous system regulation, survival, internal regulation. You guys know all this shit as therapists, okay? But you need to start integrating. This is the missing piece to the wealth, the abundance. It's trainable. You can rewire your safety patterns, you can create spaciousness in your body. You can expand your capacity to hold more. And you can do it without the hustle, which is the coolest part. You can do it without the panic. That is, the missing piece is training your subconscious mind. So how do you do that? Well, first you have to recognize what your limiting beliefs are. Neuro Linguistic programming is my favorite way to retrain my subconscious mind. I used to create hypnosis, recording scripts for myself all of the time and just listen to them. I was retraining my subconscious mind. I was working with other practitioners and doing NLP breakthrough sessions to retrain my subconscious mind. I wanted my capacity to be so big that I could just have as much overflow and abundance and wealth in my life. But I had to retrain my subconscious mind. I had to do that subconscious work so that I could then be an energetic match for the wealth and abundance that I wanted to bring into my life. So what's your next move after you realize your strategies aren't broken? You probably have most of your systems in check if you've done the work and you've hired the mentors, but just something isn't working. It's your system, it's your nervous system, it's just overwhelmed. You have to start with awareness. Then you're gonna bring in integration. You're gonna give yourself permission to go inward before trying to go bigger. This is the key. Go inward before trying to go bigger. We try to work harder and do more and add a new strategy and sign up for another program. And then when that doesn't work, we spiral. And then we go into comparison mode and we feel like we're falling behind. And I say we because I've been there. We say things like, well, what's wrong with me? Why is this taking so long? Why does it work for them and not work for me? And then we push even harder. But this is what I need you to understand. When your nervous system is dysregulated, your business is going to be dysregulated too. Your capacity to receive, whether that's receiving money, clients, ideas, support. It's directly tied to your nervous system's capacity to feel safe holding it. If you're stuck in that state of fight or flight or freeze or fawn, you're gonna repel the very overflow you're trying to attract. Again, you're gonna self sabotage. Nobody has time for that. So let me paint a picture for you. You've got your strategy dialed in. You're showing up, you're doing the right things, but your body's in a trauma response. You're hypervigilant. You're checking your phone every two seconds. You're anxious every time you post. You're looping thoughts like, well, what if it doesn't work? What if no one buys? That is not strategy. That is survival mode. That is a Dysregulated nervous system overflow does not come from survival mode. Period. End of sentence. Overflow comes when your nervous system feels safe. It comes when you stop chasing. It comes when you start attracting. It comes when your body believes it's safe to rest. It comes when you feel regulated enough to hold success without sabotaging it because you have the capacity. This is the missing piece for so many people in business. It's not that you're lazy. It's not that you're undisciplined. It's not that you're not meant for this. It's not that there's not room for you. It's just your body trying to protect you. And until you rewire that internal story, until you tell your body a new truth, no strategy in the world, no mentor in the world is going to get you to where you want to go. So we have to get really practical, just like you do with your strategy and go inwards and ask, what does your nervous system regulation actually look like? What does it look like? Do you know the signs of your own dysregulation? Are you binge watching and avoiding doing your actual work? You're just watching TV and shows? Are you doom scrolling? Are you avoiding your to do list? You're just doing busy work instead? What stories are you telling yourself? Are you using your tools? Are you doing breath work? Are you moving your body? Are you doing tapping? Are you going in nature? Are you going to your own therapist? Have you created spaciousness in your schedule instead of saying yes to everything and cramming everything in? Have you recognized that burnout isn't a badge of honor and you shouldn't have to be the hardest working person in the room all the time? Is there a boundary that's being ignored? Are there things that you aren't communicating to allow you more support and spaciousness? So do this self reflection so that you can get your system regulated again. Because when you're regulated, you can make clean decisions. You know what to say yes to. You know when to rest. You know when to stop leaking your energy. You don't have to prove your worth anymore. And then boom. You become a magnet. And you become a magnet to aligned clients and aligned opportunities. This is the energetics of overflow. Overflow is not just about more money either. Where it's not just about more clients. It's about how you feel in your business. It's about being overflowed with support and spaciousness. It's about being magnetic. And when I say magnetic, I'm just talking about being able to call in anything and everything that you want because you're an energetic match for it. So much so, it's just like a magnet. It's about being able to create and launch and receive and serve without your body shutting down. And that means you have to shift your identity. You're not just somebody who does business. You are someone who embodies success. Tell yourself a different story. Give yourself the space to create that overflow, to create the capacity to hold it. You're someone who leads themselves. You're someone who doesn't abandon herself when fear shows up. You don't run away. No, you rise up. You see yourself as worthy, even when the bank account doesn't reflect it yet. You're someone who holds that frequency of it's already mine. You have to own that. You're not just here to build a business. You're here to lead a movement. You're here to leave a legacy. You're here to model what's possible for other women. You're here to show the world what it looks like to make money and impact without sacrificing your health, your family, your peace. And listen, I'm not saying this work is easy. It's. It's not rainbows and butterflies. But I'm saying that this work is essential. You have to do the internal work to reprogram your subconscious mind. The strategy is the structure. This is your foundations. This is like building a house and building up the blocks. Your nervous system is the soil. You're not gonna be able to grow sustainable success in toxic soil. So if you've been stuck in that feast and famine, that fight or flight, your launches are feeling draining. You keep doing all the damn things. You keep investing, and you're not seeing the roi. It's time to look inward. What is your body trying to protect you from? What identity are you still holding that says success has to be hard? Where are you still in survival mode? And most importantly, what would it look like for you to feel safe being seen? What would it feel like to get paid exactly what you want to get paid. And it feels safe. What would it feel like and look like to be safe expressing yourself? Because when you feel safe in your body, your business becomes safe to grow, Then you have the capacity to move into overflow and abundance. Overflow actually just becomes inevitable when you feel safe in your body and your business. So I hope this conversation offered something a little bit different for you. I hope this is exactly what you needed to hear at the exact right time to just change everything in your business and know that it's not always about doing more and creating more. Sometimes it's just about integrating and reprogramming your subconscious mind. My love is with you. You got this. I'll see you in the next show. Thank you so much for listening to the Thriving Therapy Podcast. I hope that this episode has inspired you to reduce burnout, work smarter, and see the freedom potential you have as a therapist. We would love to have you inside the Therapist to Coach Accelerator Facebook group where we have live trainings and cheat sheets on all things marketing, sales and adding coaching ethically and legally. I am here cheering you on and I'll see you around.