A 19-word phrase transforms how people receive feedback: "I'm giving you these comments because I have very high expectations and I know that you can reach them." It works because it combines high standards with genuine belief in someone's ability, making them more likely to listen and improve.
We all know that feedback is important. If we're going to get better at something that matters, if we're going to make progress, we need information on how we're doing. But what's the best kind of feedback to give, especially when many people don't take criticism all that well? In his book, The Culture Code, Daniel Coyle offers an answer. He cites a large study of teachers giving feedback to students. And that study found that 19 words, just 19 words, had a dramatic effect in boosting performance Those 19 words were, I'm giving you these comments because I have very high expectations and I know that you can reach them. Why did that work? Well, it builds trust, it signals belonging, and it combines high standards with the assurance that people can reach those standards. The researchers call it wise feedback, and that's something all of us could use a little more of in our lives.
