A three-step framework for turning regrets into growth: treat yourself with kindness instead of self-contempt, talk or write about the regret to reduce its weight, then extract a concrete lesson and decide on a specific next action.
What do you do with your regrets? How do you turn them into an engine of progress? I have a 3-step process for doing that. Inward, outward, forward. So the first step in dealing with a regret is to treat yourself with kindness rather than contempt. Step 2, talk about your regrets, to write about your regrets. It's a form of unburdening. We remove the regrets from our shoulder. When you write about your regret or talk about your regret, you take this vaporous, abstract thing and you turn it into concrete words that's less menacing. Final step, forward. Think about your regret and ask yourself these 2 questions. What lesson is this teaching me, and what am I gonna do next? Extract a lesson from the regret, and then take that lesson and say, what is my next move going to be? So stop beating yourself up and start moving yourself forward.
