How to Pray Together

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You know, when you're talking to God, talk to your creator. I mean, he's the one who made you. He's the one who loves you the most. And I know that's even hard to believe, but he's the one who loves you the most, sees you at your worst, and still chooses to love you. He's the one that gave his son to die for you. And just talk to him about everything, and he already knows what's going on with you. But I think when we bring it to the Lord, there's just something that that's. That brings us closer to him, but also that's therapeutic. It's really therapeutic to just kind of unpack the day.

Welcome back to the Naked Marriage Podcast Summer Quickies. We're so glad you guys are here. I just realized that right now I'm wearing the shirt that I'm wearing in the. The photo logo for the Naked Marriage Podcast. So, like, you are the. The logo of us. It's like a picture of us smiling, and I'm wearing this navy blue polo, and I'm wearing that shirt right now. But I also realize I've gotten a little fatter since I was in the day that we took that picture, because, like all profile pictures, you want one that's. That's, like, skinnier than you are in real life. And so that picture, I'm. I'm not that skinny, but of course, I haven't updated that picture with a chubbier version. But I'm wearing the shirt today, and I really. The shirt don't lie. It's letting me know I'm not exactly the same size. And that's okay. You know why life happens, and you got to live. So we're glad you guys are here. This episode is nothing to do with shirts or weight. We're talking about something more significant. We're talking about prayer. Because one thing that we found in the work that we do is so many couples are missing out on one of the most intimate and powerful gifts that God gives a married couple to experience together, and that's the gift of prayer. And when you're praying with each other and for each other, it's. It can really do so much to bring your hearts together. And yet a lot of couples, they psych themselves out and they don't do this. They don't do this even maybe before meals or before bedtime. They just don't do it at all, at least together, because they've. I don't know, they've gotten out of the habit of doing it, or they never had the habit. And maybe they're intimidated. They don't know where to start. And we just want to demystify the whole thing because you're talking to your heavenly Father. He wants it to be simple. And it's a gift that we want you to be able to experience in your marriage. So we're going to take a few minutes and just talk about how that could look.

That's right. And let me tell you, prayer is essential. I mean, it is an essential part of our life individually, but also as a married couple. And, you know, I think about the times in our marriage where I've been really consistent with praying and we've been consistent with praying. I feel like I've fared much better than times when I haven't been as consistent with it. And really, it's not even necessarily that God changed the circumstances, but I know it's that God really kept my heart soft. And that's. That's really the power of prayer is it keeps us connected to God, but also to each other and also keeping our hearts kind of in the right posture, so to speak. Because when we pray together, we are humbling ourselves towards God, but we're also humbling ourselves towards each other. And there's such power in that. Because, you know, I think that the times that we remember to pray, maybe it's become routine, and. Which is not necessarily a bad thing. I mean, you want prayer to become a part of your routine, but I think that when it's. When it's part of what we would normally do together daily and when we are going through hard times, it just. It's. It means that much more to us. And you can really keep your heart soft and not let something really get a foothold in your life. Like not. Not let negativity or resentment or maybe frustration, whatever it is, you know, getting a foothold in your life. And so as far as how to pray, there's a lot of different ways you can do it. And that's the beauty of it, is it doesn't have to be one way. You know, God is our Father. A lot of times people always say, you know, just talk to God. Like, you're talking to your dad. And that's a beautiful way to say it, but I think where. Where this kind of doesn't ring so true for some people is maybe their dad wasn't necessarily a great influence in their life, or maybe they never knew their dad. And so they're like, well, what do you. What do I do with that? You know? And so what I would just say is, you know, you know, when you're talking to God, talk to your creator. I mean, he's the one who made you. He's the one who loves you the most. And I know that's even hard to believe, but he's the one who loves you the most, sees you at your worst, and still chooses to love you. He's the one that gave his son, you know, to die for you and. And just talk to him about everything, and he already knows what's going on with you. But I think when we bring it to the Lord, there's just something that's. That brings us closer to him, but also that's therapeutic. It's really therapeutic to just kind of unpack the day. And usually when we start out praying, we usually start out by thanking God first. But, you know, for what he's done in our life and our day and whatever it is that's going on, we also, you know, present requests to God, like, you know, God, please be with our kids. Like, God, help our kids to grow to know you and help us to be, you know, the best parents we can be to our kids and help us to have a great marriage. I think you can talk about issues maybe you're dealing with. Like, you know, maybe. Maybe that day you weren't as kind to each other as you wished you could have been. This is a great time as you're saying your portion of the prayer, you know, and it's good to take turns, you know, praying, and it may not start out that way, and that's okay, but you can say, you know, lord, please forgive me for losing my temper or with my wife earlier or for. For losing my temper with the kids, and help me, you know, to get it better tomorrow. Help me to do it.

And that's the prayer. I've had to pray often, you know, where I've just, man, I blew that. You know, I let my temper get the best of me and pray about it. It gives it back to God. It humbles our heart. It also puts us in a posture where we can receive healing and instruction, and it sets an example for those around us that I want to grow in these areas.

Right?

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And it's so good. Prayer is this great reset. God uses it to not only change our circumstances, but he uses it to change our own hearts as we talk to Him. And if you need kind of a model to get started with one that was taught to me years ago that sort of stuck is the word acts, A C, T, S. And it's kind of a four part prayer. It doesn't always have to look like this. It doesn't have to be formulaic all the time. But if you need a place to start, the A in acts stands for adoration. You start by just thanking God for who he is. God, I love you Jesus. Thanks for what you did on the cross. Thank you for making it. You are awesome. You're in control. You're incredible. And just praise him. And then C is for confession. It's telling him what's going on in your life and specifically the struggles. God, like I'm struggling with this. I'm having a hard time with this. I've sinned in this area. I need your forgiveness. Over here. Help me with these things. The T is for Thanksgiving. God, I just want to thank you for the stuff that I tend to take for granted. My, my marriage. Thank you for my wife. She's amazing. Thanks for my kids. God, you've blessed me with so many blessings. Thanks for my health. Thanks for my job. Thanks God. I know maybe gas prices are high, but it reminds me that I got a car. Thank you Lord. That I have a vehicle. Thank you Lord for my food that I get to eat. I mean, you can just. The list goes on and on. The more we have an attitude of gratitude, the more that God's gonna. It's just gonna take away Some of our stress. The Bible says give thanks in all circumstances. You know, always be joyful, never stop praying and give thanks in all circumstances. This is God's will for you in Christ Jesus. And that's our model. Like always have, choose joy, choose to be thankful and give thanks. So that's act, adoration, confession, thanksgiving. And then the S is for supplication, which is a big word that means asking for what you need. Sometimes I replace that S with just stuff. It's just talking about the stuff that you really need, God, you know, the stuff that's going on. I need you to come through in this area. I got this thing going on at work. I need your help. I need you to come through financially. Lord, I got this need, can you help me with this? And God cares about the details of your life even more than you do. So don't be afraid to ask him for what you need. But you don't have to even remember that formula. You know, we over complicate it. When Jesus disciples, they had the same hangup, they were like, lord, teach us how to pray, we don't know. And he walked them through what we call the Lord's Prayer. I don't think to be so much just this formula we have to follow every time, but really to show us how simple it can be. Like you know, father, thanks for who you are and you know, give us what we need today and we love you so much. And it's, it's walking us through just that simple reminder that God wants to hear from us, he's always there for us and when we'll do this together as husband and wife. There's a unique power in that, even more so than happens when we pray alone. And so don't neglect this aspect of growing together, not only in your faith, but in your marriage.

Absolutely. And if you wanna enhance your prayer life, I would say read the Bible more. And I know that sounds so simple, but I'm telling you, we have never lived at a time where it is easier to read the Bible. Or another way of saying it is just to put the Bible in your mind and in your heart. And what I mean by that is you can read it. I mean the Bibles, you can get a Bible free at any church, you can get a free Bible app. I mean you can get the YouVersion app, which is awesome. There's the Bible gateway app, which is awesome. Those are two that I go to a lot. You can even just look up on the Internet, there's something called Bible Hub. And so if you're having trouble understanding a verse, you put in a certain verse or a certain subject, and it's going to bring up all these different verses or versions of that verse, and it kind of gives new meaning to that verse and kind of can make a light bulb go off. But I want to really encourage you, if you're not a big reader, that's fine. Go ahead and listen to the Bible. There's so many different podcasts that have Bible in a Year listening plans. I'm doing that this year, and it's been so fun. Like, I've really enjoyed it. And the guy just has a pleasant voice and reads it. And I think with this particular plan that I'm doing, he does some of the Old Testament, and then he does some of the New Testament, and then he does a proverb and a psalm each day. And so basically, I'm getting different kind of parts of the Bible every day. And by the end of this plan, by the end of the year, I will have read the entire Bible in a year, or I will have listened to the entire Bible in a year. And so there's a lot of different ways to do this. There's one of the most popular ones. What is it called, sweetie? You've listened to it before. Bible Recap, right? It's called Bible Recap.

Bible Recap is where they go back and they recap the stories of the Bible. It's a cool way to, like, give you some biblical literacy.

But I think it's in a year. There's a Bible Recap in a Year?

No, the one in a year is. I think it's just called Bible in a Year, and it's Father Mike something.

That's what I'm thinking of.

Yes, it's a priest that will read the Bible, and it's one of the most popular podcasts, which is number one, which is encouraging to me to see that of all the stuff out there, of all the divisive stuff, of all the negative stuff, the. One of the most popular podcasts in the world is this guy just reading the Bible, just word for word, right out of the Bible, doing it in a way that the whole Bible's read in a year. And these are all free resources. And coming back to the prayer part specifically, if you focus in on the Psalms, which are essentially poems within the Bible, written mostly by King David, but also by others, every one of those can be read as a prayer.

Yes, they're beautiful.

It is. It's beautiful. It's poetic. And if you read it thinking about the details of your own life as you read it. You can read it out loud, really, as a prayer to God, just to kind of help you get started. Say, lord, you know this psalm, as I read it, like, this is my prayer today, and this is what I'm on my mind and my heart as I'm reading this. You know, the struggles I'm going through, you know, and it can just help you get started. And so God doesn't want this to be complicated. He is here to remove barriers from us. Jesus came to Earth to remove the barriers between God and people, because Jesus is that bridge. He's God in the flesh, and he wants you to put your hope and faith in him, and he wants you to experience a relationship with him. Not just a religious set of rules to follow, but a relationship with God. And really, relationships are what life's all about. And that's why we talk about marriage so much, because that's the most important human relationship, but your relationship with God's the most important relationship of all. And prayer is a way where both those two most important relationships can be fused together in a beautiful way. As you pray with your spouse, you're strengthening not only your faith, but you're strengthening your marriage.

Yes.

And so give this a try, guys. You know, be the one to go first. Don't wait for your spouse to do it. Say, listen, like, I want to. I want to pray for our meal. I think this is something we can start doing. Or I want to just hold hands and say a prayer at night before we go to bed. And you don't have to say anything if you don't want to, but I just. I really. I just want to do this for us. And if you want to say something, that's great, too. I would love. Love to. To be here and. And hear what you have to say to God, too. And. But don't. If your spouse just isn't in that place where they're yet comfortable, encourage it. But don't. You don't have to, like, pressure them or coerce them, but invite them to join you. And so, as we wrap up here in a minute, we're gonna do something we don't do often on the podcast. We're gonna pray for you together. And, you know, I feel like if we're gonna talk about prayer on a podcast, let's actually.

Let's have a prayer.

Let's pray. So, sweetie, before we pray, any anything else you want to share?

No, I'd like to just say the prayer.

All right. Well, I'll say put it to action. I'll start out and then you. You wrap up. How about that?

All right, Sounds good.

Father, thank you so much for every person listening right now. And this podcast family all over the world has been such an encouragement to Ashley and me. And I just thank you, Lord, that you've allowed us to be a part of this journey of encouraging people in their marriages. And seeing Jesus, the work that you've done through this ministry to restore marriages, to save marriages, to strengthen families, to point people toward you for the first time, it makes me just stand in awe of who you are to think about this great work that we get to be part of and this wonderful team here at XO Marriage, this amazing group of people that we get to work with. God. So thank you. I want to thank you specifically for Ashley today. What a privilege it is to be her husband and best friend and what a privilege it is to do this work by her side. And I just pray your blessing on every part of her life. God, she's next to your grace, Jesus, the greatest gift in my life. And help me to treasure her as the gift that she is. And help me, Lord, to encourage her and cheer her on in all the many things you've called her to do and gifted her to do. And I just pray, God, that you'd help me be the husband that she deserves. And I pray these things in Jesus name.

Lord, thank you so much for the opportunity to come over into these AirPods earbuds or watching on YouTube. Lord, it's just a revolutionary time that we live in that we can connect and talk about you and talk about marriage and everything in between. Lord, we just thank you for that opportunity. And Lord, I just pray for every couple of years who is listening or watching. Lord, I know that. That you have a special thing you want each of us to learn. And Lord, I just pray that you open up hearts and minds to whatever it is that you want us to learn whenever we're listening to any kind of podcast episode. Lord, and I just pray specifically for their marriages. I pray that they are strengthened, Lord. I pray not only they grow in their relationship with each other, but that they grow in their relationship with you, Lord. And I pray right now for Dave. Lord, thank you so much for the awesome gift that he is in my life. I just pinch myself that I get to do things like this podcast with him. He's just such a gift and makes me laugh every day. And I just thank you for that, Lord. And I just pray that I can be the wife that he needs Lord and just be such a support to him and to brighten his day every day like he does mine. Lord and I just thank you so much for the gift of marriage in our lives. Lord we just love you. We praise you for the great God that you are. Lord thank you for loving us first and for giving us the gift of your son. It's in Jesus name we pray. Amen.

Amen. Guys, thank you so much for listening to this episode or watching on YouTube if you've been watching. We appreciate it. So just make prayer a daily part of your routine if it's not already. Keep doing it if you're already doing it. And thank you so much for your encouragement and prayer for this ministry and for this podcast. We appreciate your prayers and we've seen God work through your prayers so thank you so much. God bless. We'll see you next time.

Bye guys.