Modeling Christ in Our Marriage // Hump Day Q&A

Foreign. You know what time it is, sweetie?

It's hump day. Q and A time. Hump day, Q and A. Hump day Q and A. Welcome to the Naked Marriage Podcast. Hump day Q and A. We love answering your questions. So every Wednesday we're dropping a special podcast episode focused on one of your questions. You can submit your own marriage related question online@nakedmarriagepodcast.com or by sending us a message on Instagram. Avendashley Willis. We've got a great question today, so let's dive in. So our question today says, how can I model a good Christian example for my children if my spouse has decided to walk away from the Lord but is still okay with me teaching them the Bible and how to serve God? That's a good question.

That's a real good question. And first off, if you are listening and you're in a situation where you feel alone in your marriage. Marriage, just know that we're praying for you. It's heartbreaking. Those can be heartbreaking situations, and God is with you in it. The Bible says God is close to the brokenhearted. He rescues those whose spirits are crushed. And he is with you in this. You know, he's always with us, of course, but I think that we can sense and feel God's presence in such a unique and special way in those valleys of disappointment and aloneness and hurt. And if you're there, you know, reach out to him because he's there. So to get to your question, you know, very specifically, your husband's walked away from God, but he's still cool with you being, you know, being the one to teach the kids these things. And so I would say take advantage of that and you model for your kids. You teach your kids. You know, I once, you know, heard a pastor tell a story about being out outside in the summertime in a part of the country where they had lightning bugs or fireflies. And he would see this bug kept lighting up right by his eye. And he said, I'm outside, and there are all these huge lights around me. There's the moon, this massive light. There's the big lights of a city off in the distance. There's a street light down the road. But the one light that I noticed the most wasn't the biggest or the flashiest. It was that little lightning bug. But it's all I could see. And it's because it was the closest. And the point was, he said, you as the parents, you don't have to be the biggest, flashiest light in your kid's life, you only have to be the closest. And so you get as close to your kids as you can and you take advantage of that proximity and you love them and you serve and you point them toward Jesus and you model your faith in very real and practical, authentic ways. Bring them to church, help them get involved, help them to see faith is not just a Sunday thing, but something that impacts every part of their life. Whether it's how you weave stories of the Bible into daily conversations, or praying with them, thanking God for the good, praying with him about the struggles. And you're close influence in their life could be the very thing God uses to really help a real faith take root in them. And so I'm just so thankful that they have a mom who clearly cares and they have a mom who clearly loves the Lord and loves them. And who knows, maybe by your example and you living out your life that way, just maybe your husband's heart might soften and you might be the main factor God uses to bring your husband back to faith. Who knows? But you just do what you can do and really you gotta trust the rest into God's hands.

It's so true. And this is where, you know, definitely teach your kids about the Lord, take them to church, keep on just fostering their faith and pouring into them. I think that's just a beautiful, beautiful thing. But I would say be very careful not to demonize your husband. I think, you know, not saying things. And I can tell this lady has got a kind heart. But just in case anybody else listening has the same problem, you know, be very careful not to say, you know, well, we wish dad would come to church with us because he's just gonna burn in hell. I mean, don't say things like that.

Like, don't dad wasn't worshiping the devil today.

I mean, seriously, like the church lady. But you know, it can become that way because we can, we have to be very careful with our heart too, because it can become a resentful thing. And because your kids are going to ask questions, they're gonna say, why doesn't dad come with us? And you could say, you know, sweetie, I don't really know. You know, maybe you could ask your dad, you know, maybe he could give you an answer. But you know what, Your dad loves you. And we're gonna keep on inviting him to church instead of saying, well, he just doesn't love the Lord, you know, like I love the Lord. Cause I think it's easy to prop ourselves up and then put our spouse down. Because we're like, well, we're just walking in the spirit. And I mean, he's just not, you know, and I don't know what's gonna happen to him because he's just leaving himself out to dry. Like, we can get in that mode. So I would just encourage anybody in this predicament to be very careful and instead, keep on inviting your spouse. Keep on loving your spouse. Showing your spouse God's love. I mean, in the Word it talks about this. When there's one spouse who's a believer and one spouse who is not, it says, keep on loving them. Just like Christ, you know, loves them. And who knows your love. Your example of walking with Jesus could very much bring them to the Lord. But I will also say this one awesome thing about church and about getting your kids involved in youth group and the preschool programs, the elementary school programs, is they always have performances. And this is a great way to get your unbelieving spouse who never steps foot in church to actually come to church. And the beautiful things about these programs is these program directors know that there are unbelieving spouses out there and they always present the gospel. And I'm telling you that I have seen God work through the gospel presentation of three year olds singing about the Lord. I have seen parents tears coming down their face when they see their child proclaiming the love of Jesus. And so don't underestimate God. Working through your kids, working through you and what you're doing, and keep on leading them to the Lord in the way that you are.

Yeah, that's so good. And as you interact with that spouse who right now is in a different place in their faith, don't interact with them with a judgmental tone, but just with joy and authenticity. Be willing to share the good things God is doing in your life and in your kid's life and even in.

His life or her life.

Yeah, help them see it through your kindness and through your love. Nobody was ever nagged into falling in love with God or nagged into changing their heart in any real way. But love is the very thing that God uses to change all of us. And so if you really want to change somebody, you don't do it by trying to change them. You do it simply by loving them and letting God do the rest.

Thank you all so much for listening to today's episode of Hump Day. Q and A. We love getting your questions and we want to answer your question. So if you go to nakedmarriagepodcast.com you can submit your question right there. Or you can follow us on Instagram Avanashley Willis and you can give us your questions right there by giving us a dm. So we'll catch you next time on Hump Day. Keep Q and A.