How to Bust Through Fear So You Can Breakthrough

Right before you're going to have a breakthrough, before you ask someone to marry you, before you start the business, before you make the first sale, before you take that uncomfortable action and step off the path to something new. Isn't that when fear is the greatest? Welcome back to the on youn Future podcast behind the Scenes edition. I want to talk about Rob Riggle today. If you don't know who Rob Riggle is, some of the funniest characters that you've seen in the last couple of decades has been Rob Riggle. Google him. You'll recognize him when you see it. But it was a great conversation about life, about success, about fear, about the things that hold us all back. It was a great conversation about the human condition. So we took some points from the training that I thought I could go a little deeper on from last week's podcast. If you like this, by the way, make sure you share it with a friend. Like it? Subscribe, leave me a message. We'd love to hear what you think and what you want more of. First thing is fear comes before success. Isn't that obvious Right before you're going to have a breakthrough, before you ask someone to marry you, before you start the business, before you make the first sale, before you take that uncomfortable action and step off the path to something new. Isn't that when fear is the greatest? But what if we recognize that that probably has already stopped us a few times in life when the fear bubbled up, we're like, oh, maybe this isn't for us. No, that is just the universe making sure you have the wherewithal, that you have the energy, the desire, the passion to actually go through with it. What if that is the test of all tests. Sprinkle some fear. Make them have self doubt. Let them feel like an imposter syndrome. If they don't go, then they're not deserving of it. Let them go back where they were. I think of things like that. What if fear was the greatest gift to you because you knew your next level was on the other side of it? Really think about that next time you go to start that thing, scale that thing. Say yes, say no. Finally say I must or I won't. Right at that moment you will be the most scared. And that's probably the turning point for that next level of you. Another one. Rob had this story on Saturday Night Live when he that's where he started. It was a dream of his. Another thing you remember he wrote down I'm going to be on Saturday Night Live. And it took him 10 years to get there. So, you know, you ever hear that God's delays are not his denials? I love that saying. Also, we all overestimate what we can do in a year. That's a true story. And underestimate what we can do in five or 10. Long story short, after 10 years, he gets the opportunity to do an audition for Saturday Night Live practice, rehearsed, went and saw Lorne Michaels, the founder and creator of Saturday Night Live. Auditioned and literally came out and thought he just had totally screwed it up. He said he was literally yelling at himself walking down the streets of New York saying, you fool, you jerk. This is too much. It's almost that same fear, that same self doubt, that same imposter syndrome. When you feed it a little, it tells you c, you're not good enough. See, you don't know enough. See, you live at the wrong time in history. See, you're too old, you're too young. You're not that smart. That voice is dying for it to be fed. When he didn't feel he did great, he fed that voice and it yelled at him. I've done that way too many times in my own life as well. It's not if that voice is going to poke its ugly head up and and share the thoughts and insecurities that you have. It's just when it's going to happen. And the second part is it's going to happen, but the second part is, how are you going to deal with it? Are you going to say, I hear you, I hear what you're saying. But there's also another side. Ten years ago, while I was in the army and I wrote down that I'd be on Saturday Night Live, this was so far from a reality. I got in front of Lorne Michaels. I did the best I could in the moment and maybe he'll see something in me. And he did. He got the job on Saturday Night Live. But that voice, that inner voice, that inner fear can drive us so much that we don't start the business. We don't scale the business, especially in the business. Tony and I always promote the self education industry. Selling what you know, creating a course, a workshop, being a coach or a coaching program, or having a membership site or teaching people on YouTube or doing your own podcast or writing a book. That inner voice of, you're not good enough. You don't know enough. You're not this guy or you're not this girl. Maybe just stay where you are. Isn't life good enough? And that voice is just always going to be around. Just gotta punch it in the face, right? You gotta have the other side of it. Rob also talked about how terrifying it was to take responsibility for his own future. You gotta think about that. The name of this podcast is the Own youn Future Podcast. Because I believe once you decide to own your future, that it's not your parents responsibility, it's not your friends, it's not even your spouse, it's not the government, it's not regulations, it's not what the economy is. It's not that there might be more obstacles than opportunities. At least in your head. None of that matters the day you decide to say, I am owning my future, I am owning my success and I'm owning my failure. Ah. It's the most liberating thing on the planet. You get to own your decisions, you get to own the fear, you get to own the success, you get to. You get to own the accolades or own the condemned being condemned. Right? You get to own those things. And when you realize it's all you and you don't point fingers anywhere, just point back at the person in the mirror. Life changes. It's when you grow. Rob's deeper purpose in life is fatherhood. And we had some good conversations on that. Again, things that we had the chance to talk about when the camera went off. One great thing that I think was a big shift in my life is being married to my wife, Lisa. I made some major commitments to myself to preserve the love that we had found, to preserve the family, to not make mistakes, to we all make mistakes. I should say not make the same mistakes again. Not bring the same version of me into this relationship. And one of the things I promised myself was, and I live by this every day as if my wife hired a private investigator to film me all week when I wasn't watching and to look at every text, every dm, every email when I wasn't watching that she'd get done looking at it and love me more. That's pretty bold, right? I live by that. Every day we talked about being a parent, you could tell your kids anything. You could teach them anything. You could preach, you could tell stories, you could, you can ground them, you could give them guidelines. But kids will become who you are. That's just a fact. They don't hear what you say because what you're doing is too loud. And I think in life that's such a great story. That's a great thought process, I should say is when it comes to the team that you have or the team you're going to grow, or your co, your co workers or your boss or the people that work under you or your wife or your husband or your children. Who are you when no one is watching is really who you are. And being in alignment with that, for Rob and myself, I want to be a better version so my kids see a better human being, so they can become who I am. My kids have been the greatest lessons I've ever had in my life because I can really look in the mirror and say, do I want them to have that experience? No. Do I want them to act that way? No. Step it up, Change, pretend they're watching. And the last one I really like that he said is be intentional. Be intentional with everything you do or don't do it. People dabble too much. They have a thought, an idea, a dream, and they stick their. Stick their toe in the water. And if it's a little cold, they run and look for something else that's warm and cozy. The most successful people I know in relationships in the self education industry, writing books, doing courses, or any business possible are very intentional. Once they decide it's all in. Burn the boats. No dabbling. I think that's the greatest gift I could give my children is to be intentional. Stop waiting for the magic wand. Stop waiting for someone to help. Stop waiting for things to fall on our laps. We have to decide where it is we want to go. We have to face the fear and know that the fear is part of it. We got to watch out for that voice that yells us and tells us we're not good enough. We have to take ownership of our future. We have to pretend no one's watching or act like someone's watching, even when they're not. Get in alignment with who you're supposed to be. Last. Be intentional. Take massive action and live into the person you're meant to be. Thank you for being here for the Own youn Future podcast. Make sure you subscribe. If you don't, leave us a message and we'll see you next time on the Own youn Future podcast. Sam.