If you are ready to make goals a reality, there's no better training. Change Your Life in 2023

If you're human, I would bet to say that there's some things in your life that have gone wrong. Right? When you thought you were getting momentum, you thought you were going to another level, you found, you know, the business, the partnership, the money, the job, even the relationship. If you talk in your personal life and then something happened, something went sideways, there was an incident, there was a moment, there was something that changed, that screwed it all up. I know those feelings as well. But here's what I want to tell you today in this training. Today we're going to bust all that. We're going to change the way you look at life, the way you look at success, and change your framework, change the hardwiring. I really believe that this success loop that I'm calling this is the first time again, I'm going to probably end up tweaking this a few times. I'm actually doing it on stage next week in front of, like, 10,000 people. So I better get this right, right? But this is the first time. So today, if you're here, if you're ready to make goals and dreams a reality, I don't think there could be a better training in the world. Listen, I mean that because I'm always obsessing on how to go upstream, right? I'm always obsessing on how to, like, setting goals and attaching emotions to them. Amazing. Like, there's so many hacks to make goals and dreams a reality. But when you can go way upstream, it's like you could take medicine to fix the problem, but what if you could go upstream and eat different so you never had the problem in the first place? Right. It's kind of like that with medicine. If you're into healthy food, healthy eating, so you optimize your body, you know, you're doing the things way upstream so you never end up sick. Right? There's some people that are born with diabetes, and that's horrific. I have family members that are another people that their eating habits cause the diabetes, right? The diabetes could. If you could go upstream and change certain habits, the diabetes goes away. Right? So I want the same thing with goals. What can we do to go upstream and do things on the foundational level? So the goals just keep happening and you're like, I keep hitting these goals, I'm going to set more because more keep happening. That's what we're going to talk about today. So you ready for this? All right, let's do it. Let's go wide enough so you can see this. And I'm not being lazy. I'm kind of sitting here. I might get up, but let's just talk about life. I created this thing I'm calling the success loop. And these loops happen again. First time I've ever explained. But I really want you to get into this thought process right now and go as tight as you can on us right now. These loops always happen. This loop is failure. Something went wrong, it didn't go right. So I'll get to it. I don't want to give too much away in advance, but I want you to think about any time in your life where it went sideways, where you had a hard realization or an incident. So I want to talk about this. A hard realization is, I hate my job. I can't do this another day. Enough is enough. I hate being broke. I'm done with it. I'm done struggling. I'm done feeling this way. I'm going after it. A hard realization is. Could be in a relationship. I tried for five years. I've given all of me. I went to counseling. This relationship is done or I need to fix it now, Right? People have hard realizations. When they're smoking, they cough. One day going upstairs, they look at their grandchildren and go, or grandchild and go, I'm never going to see him get older. Puts a cigarette down. Hard realization, it's changed. Stomp it out, it's over. Or there's an incident, your partner screws you over, the company goes bankrupt. You're advertising on social media and they change the algorithm and social media advertising goes away. There is these moments in life, whether they're a hard realization or an incident, that change the course of everything. And how you handle that is how your life will turn out. You see so many times in life, people. People go through several of these loops. They have a loop when people tell them they're crazy and they start their business. Doesn't work out, but they learned and they get another business. But there's a point, and I want you to think about this. There's a point as we go through this process, there's certain points where people opt out and go flat, right? Hard realization, My partner took all my money and ran off. You know what? I'm never going to be in business for myself again. That's it. This was too hard. This was too painful. And that's when people flatline. And they don't really flatline because there's that old saying, if you're not climbing, you're sliding. So people go. You know, many people I meet and go Ah, Dean. You know, back in 97, back in 2005, I started a business. It was going good, but then the economy shifted. I lost everything. To hell with that, man. I'm never going back there. You know, I had it. But they flatlined. The hard realization or that incident was too much for them because they didn't have the process. I'm about to share with you right now, and I want to give you an example that I want to kind of track as we go through this in this probably had to be 15 years ago, so maybe more. So I first, when I first started sharing with people how to make money, how I made money, I created a course called Motor Millions. Like, so many years ago, in 1998 or 99, I created it, and it was a course on how I made money wholesaling cars, matching buyers and sellers, and how I started a car dealership. And it was a cool little niche product product. Now, that company grew to about $5 million a year with blood, sweat and tears and teaching people how to make money with cars. And now, at the same time, I was doing real estate. I was doing cars and real estate. So I'm telling you this for a reason. So as the company's growing, I wanted to put all my efforts, all my energy into my real estate education, because real estate is what really moved the needle. Real estate is what made me a millionaire in my 20s, right. So I. I wanted to share that. So someone that I worked with came along, introduced me to a guy, and he ended up wanting to buy the company, Motor Millions. More of a structured company, more of running it, more of running it through committees and a corporation. And I was kind of running it like a mom and pop, if that makes sense. Right? So he comes in and he buys the company now. Gave me a little bit of money up front, but was gonna pay me every quarter, a big chunk of money. So now I'm so excited. I built this company, I sold it for millions of dollars. I'm going to get a check every quarter. And now I can put all my focus into my real estate education, which I was so passionate, and my real estate at the time, and learning marketing and learning success and going to masterminds to figure out how to be a better businessman. So I'm really excited. But what they did to Motor Millions was odd. They started changing stuff dramatically. They started making it much more corporate. It lost its, like, emotional connection to the people that were putting their faith in me. And all of a sudden, the first quarter came and I didn't get my check. And then the second quarter came and I didn't get my check, even though we sent emails and letters. And I find out that they literally blew up that company in six months. It went from a great company like a horse. Give them a horse that can win races, they broke its leg and now it's done. And then I find out that they hadn't paid refunds. That means people bought a product, they didn't like it, for some reason, they wanted their money back and they didn't pay it. So my attorney calls me and he says, we did a deep dive. There's a million dollars in refunds. They use your face as the brand. You're not on the hook, you could go bankrupt, but you're going to have to do something and we have to go to court to take the company back. I, I had to go to court to take a horse with a broken leg back, basically. So I want to tell you, when I had that moment of all this, like, I made it here, I'm doing good, I got momentum, I sold the company. I'm going on to my next one. All of a sudden I had a hard realization. I had an incident happen in my life and I want to tell you when I got off the phone with the attorney, I just sat there and said, wow, this is a lesson for me. I'll be better, I'll be stronger. No, I didn't. I had a cordless phone, not a cell phone, a cordless phone in my hand. I threw it against my wall and smashed it into a million pieces. I put a hole in my wall and I went into the most self pity deep dive of negativity that anyone could ever do. I said, I'm like, who are you? You thought you were smart, you didn't go to college. People who told you you were a dreamer, now they're right. I was playing above my head. Who did I think I was selling a company? I should have got a better attorney. I should have slot more, I should have got more money up front. What am I going to do now? Then all of a sudden I did what everyone does and we start stacking. What happens when you have a hard realization or incident is we start stacking. Oh my God. I should have never have done this. This was stupid. Oh my God. If I can't do that, I can't pay my employees, then I can't pay the rent. I got a 10 year lease. Oh my God. I give my mom money and my dad money every month. I'm not going to Be able to pay them. Oh, my God. All the people who told me that I was a dreamer, they're going to know that they were right. I'm going to go bankrupt. What if this gets in the newspaper and people are going to think I owe the million bucks because they saw my face when I don't even own the company. And I just started stacking till I was almost crippled. Till almost crippled. And this is the moment I realized this is when people can flatline. This is when they jump off the loop and go flat for the rest of their life. But I realize now what I've been able to do in these loops that I want to share with you today. Because I'm betting something like this has happened in your life. Small, big, massive, it all feels the same on the inside. It hurt me when I was doing it with going from firewood to cars, from cars to real estate. Whether it was $10, 10,000 or 10 million, the motions feel the same. So I started stacking. But here's what I realized after. And I don't know if I waddled in pain and pity for three days or three weeks. I'm not sure it was a while ago, but I remember. This is the lesson you need to write down right now. What I started to do is I started stacking what could go right. Just to counterbalance the dizziness of what I was doing and abusing myself and not sleeping. I started stacking what could go right. Could I take the company back? Can I get it back on track? Can I use this knowledge as information to scale my real estate education company? And I started finding things that I learned this lesson. Listen, did I like it? Hell, no. But did I find a way to say, I'm learning this is trial and error? Yes. And it counterbalanced it a little bit. But then I went on to the next step. And the next step is, who do I not want to be? I want you to think about this again. This might be stuff you've heard before. I'm not sure because I never really thought through this process. This has been years in the making to extract this. When I really boil it down, if I want to get to the base, there's a lot of personal growth that I've done. But it all boils down to who do I not want to be? You know who I didn't want to be? I didn't want to be the guy that started his own business. And people go, I knew he wasn't going to make it. He didn't go to college. He's not that smart, didn't have money. Ah, Mr. Big Shot. Look at him now. I didn't want to be that guy. I didn't want to be the guy that my parents come in and go, it's okay, Dean. You know what? You can get yourself a job. I didn't want to be the guy that put my tail between my legs and went and worked for somebody, even though I was thinking about it when I first started. I didn't want to be the guy that used to be successful. I didn't want to be the guy that missed my opportunity. I didn't want to be the guy that had to get a job and have someone else tell me how to run my life. My deep why is to be in control of my time, my life, and everything I do. I didn't want to be that guy. And when I started thinking about that, I started thinking about the next thing is, who do I want to be? Who do I want to be? Not what, not how much money, what's the brand, how much money does it make? How many employees do I have? What's my significance? How cool do I look? What car do I drive? What house do I have? None of that. Who the hell do I want to be as a human? When I started to think about that, all of a sudden, I started getting momentum, and I started having this little incantation saying, if I can get through this, I can get through anything. If I can get through this, I can get through anything. You know who I wanted to be? I wanted to be the rebound king. I want to be the person that no one can hold them down. I want to be the person that proves all the naysayers wrong. I want to be the person that shows the world that you could throw whatever shit you want at me. I got this. I want to be the person that learns from my mistakes, even though it's painful. When I started feeling that way, as you can feel now, I started saying, hell with this. This company is not taking me down. I have lives to change. I have impact to make. I want to be a different human being. When I started thinking who I wanted to be, man, everything changed. The goosebumps on my arm were coming the way I felt when I was stacking negativity. I was becoming somebody completely. You see how you can bail and go flatline, but you got to go through the whole loop. The next thing I started to think about is the hard reality. The hard reality of who do I not want to be? Who I want to be. And then the hard reality is who am I actually being? Who am I actually being in this very moment? Who am I being? I'm being someone that had self pity. I'm being someone who felt bad for myself and I didn't want that. And when I noticed that I went right back to who do I want to be? Then after that, this is the one that might be the most important thing for every single one of you watching is if I stayed with this stacking, if I stayed with being the person that I didn't want to be, who would I be in five years from now? Think about that. It's five years from today. What's going on in your life? What right now is difficult? What can you stack when you go through this process? What's holding you back? What obstacle is challenging you right now? What is stopping you from starting the business? Whether it's real estate, online marketing, what's stopping you from scaling your company, going out and doing your own thing? What's stopping you from getting that raise or making an impact on the world or starting your life coaching or your fitness coaching business. What is stopping you right now? What's stopping you? I want you to think about this right now. What if it was five years from today, right now and we're back here in my studio, we're talking and still nothing's really moved in your life. The needle hasn't moved. You still got the same thoughts, still got the same dreams, still getting your fix on personal growth by watching videos and same thing I do, listening to books. But what if nothing changed? What if you're in the same. I want you to think about this, right? I don't care if you close your eyes. What if you were in the same exact boat? What if the same problems were there? What if the same money issues, what if the same grumpy boss or dead end job or not enough money coming up. What if it was exactly the same in five minutes? And how can you feel that right now? How can you feel that in your body? How can you feel that in your bones to where it's disturbing, get disturbed. Because projecting a painful picture can get you to take action more than anything pleasureful. Because if you think you're going to be here, if you think you're going to be here in this exact spot in five years or worse. Because if you're not climbing, you know the other side of that you are sliding. You might not even be here, you might be down here. Let that pain sink in. You want motivation for the best. 12 months of your entire life. Let that sink in. But now, once you feel that, what is the opposite? Before we went from who do I not want to be to who I want to be now? I want to go. What's the painful future that you project compared to what's your compelling future? What's your compelling future? I want you to think about this. If you have a Ferrari, a Lamborghini, whatever car would be like a dream or just a fast car. Maybe it's a Corvette, I don't know. But if you have the fastest car, I just bought a new Tesla. Oh, my God. It's so fast, I can't even hit the gas. I get vertigo. I hit the gas. It's 2.7 seconds, 0 to 60. It is so fast. It's ridiculous that it doesn't make any noise. It's just a fast golf cart, right? But if I don't have gps, I don't turn it on. And I want to go to a destination, but I don't have any directions. Does it matter how fast my car is? You ever feel in your life that you're going really, really fast? You're working harder than everyone else, you're moving and shaking, but you're not really getting the results that you want? Ever feel that way? You know, I have. Because you know what you didn't have? You didn't have a compelling future. You didn't have something to point that fast car at in the direction in which you want to go. You're just going down the back road super fast. So you might feel busy, you might feel overwhelmed, you might feel you're doing everything you want to do in your power, but you're not. You're just running on a treadmill. It doesn't matter how fast you go on a treadmill. You don't get anywhere. You stay in the same place. So let me ask you right now, are you running on a treadmill? And if you're running on the treadmill, in most cases, it's simply because you don't have a compelling future. Listen, I went through this. I'm really open about my divorce. I went through last year. I'm really open about this. I went through this loop. The worst, most heavy loop of my entire life. Pain. I've gone through 10 of these loops in my life, just so you know. And some of them I never thought I'd come out of, but they're part of it. And I'll share that in a moment. But I have to tell you something. I got to a point where I Was the hard realization I knew was over and my wife and I were splitting and my kids would only be with me half the time. I started stacking, I stacked so bad, you have no idea. My kids are going to be ruined. I'm only going to see them half the time. What if they don't like me? What if they change the personality that they are because of me? What if I don't get along with their mom and she says bad things about me? What if. What if, what if. What if all the hard work I did to create solid little human beings changed? What if I'm lonely and sad and can't see him? What if when I travel and I come home, if it's not my day, I can't see him? What if. What if I was stacking so much that I gave myself anxiety for the first time in my life? Like, legit, not I'm anxious, legit panic attack, anxiety, no sleep. Popping a Xanax once a week just so I could sleep. And this is something I do every single day because I was living here. But then I went through the loop and I said, who do I not want to be? You can imagine that. Who do I want to be? Who was I being? I projected a painful future, and then I then. And my buddy Tony Robbins is the one that helped me snap out of it. He goes, dude, I hear you talking about all this crap. Where's your compelling future? Where is it? And I'm like, dude, I can't even see it. I don't know why I can see it in business. I can't see it in my personal life. He said, pull your head out of your ass. Basically, write down your compelling future right now. It was start of the shift. It was the start of this shift of going through the loop. I want to tell you, everything I wrote down over a year ago is, in fact, completely true. My kids are thriving. I have quality over quantity. They were just here with me now. They just walked out two minutes ago. I see them pretty much every single day. Their mom, my ex, one of my dearest friends. I have new love in my life. I'm happier than I've ever been in my life. Everything I wrote down about my compelling future became my reality and more. More than I ever imagined. But I couldn't see it until I went through this process. You can't see where it is you want to go. If you're stuck here or you're stuck here or you're not feeling the pain of staying there, you need to get your compelling future, down on pain, New Year's resolutions, goals. All those things are amazing. But if you just write it down without this process, they're just words on a paper. Did they work last year? Did they work the year before, the months before? In most cases, no. That's why you got to go through this whole process. See all these places people can opt out and go flat for the rest of their life. Oh, my God, divorce is so painful. I'll never be in a relationship again. I'll never have a good relationship again. My kids again. All those things are times, places you could opt out, and that's not a place to opt out. But when you get to this point, when you go through this process and you get to the compelling future, after stacking negative and positive, after who you don't want to be, after who you want to be, after the hard reality of who you're being after, you project a painful future. When you get to here, this is when momentum begins. SAM.