Redefining Failure with Trent Shelton

What are they going to get and how are they going to feel?

If you're always controlled by circumstances, it's not real enough for you either. One or two things happen when you get to your future, wherever that is, 10 years, 20 years, next year, two months from now, you're either going to rejoice or regret. I know if I continue to weather the storm, the storm shall pass at some point and I'll continue to grow.

Own your future. Because if you don't, someone else will. Everybody, welcome back to the Own youn Future podcast. I'm so stoked today because the cool part is I get to interview a lot of friends. Not kind of friends, real friends. And today, this is going to be super special. I don't care what you're doing, stop what you're doing. Listen to every second of this. Not only is this gentleman, ex NFL player, has had such an amazing career, over 60 million people a week are impacted by this man. One of, hands down, the greatest speakers, inspirational, motivational speakers of our generation. But the cool part, I know him as an amazing man who loves to serve, loves to impact others. That comes from his heart. He's an amazing father, an amazing husband, a dear friend. And without further ado, can we give it up for Mr. Trent Sheldon? What's up, man?

Appreciate you having me.

I know we can't shake hands like we're not hanging out. We've just been hanging out in the back for the last few hours. Man, it's so good to have you here. And, you know, I was just telling this story earlier. We got some other people in the room next door. We're filming this podcast and I was introducing you and it was cool to kind of reflect. I think we're over 10 years of being friends and I remember the first time I watched this man speak and share from his heart. The thoughts I had in my head were the world needs more Trent Shelton. And I'm so glad watching you just grow. I mean, you were already doing amazing when I met you and has nothing to do with me. Of course we've helped each other along the way, but watching you grow and watching you impact and check a video on Facebook and it's at 10 million views, then 25 million. I'm like, you know, and I know we've been cheering each other on from afar. So, so good to have you here.

Thanks for having me. And you know, I don't want you to undermine your influence in my life. You know, what you've been able to do for me and really Helping me understand my worth. You know, like I was telling people in there, like, you're one of those people in my life that has given me permission, has to allow me to step into my worth and to grow things. So every time I get around you in the most positive way, it's next level. And I love getting around next level people because it makes me think, okay, there's something more to this, and you're one of those people that inspires that for me.

Thanks, man. Appreciate it. And you know what I love? What I hope with this podcast is that we get under the skin. Like, I love being on people's podcasts, but a lot of times I'm asked the same questions. And the truth is, when my team wanted me to do the Own youn Future podcast, you know how long ago they asked me to do it?

How long ago?

Four years ago.

Four years ago.

Four years ago. And I just kept saying the only way I want to do it is if I get to bring on people that I respect, adore, and I can ask the stuff that maybe gets underneath the hood, it's a little different. So I hope that's our journey today. And, you know, this is the Own youn Future podcast. And I want to start by saying, what does that mean to you? Because I know at different phases of our lives what it meant at 18 for you to own your future, kind of own your decisions, own your choices. Right. I love thinking if you don't own your future, someone else is going to. And I hate that feeling of someone else telling me how to live, how to dress, how to parent, what to do for a living. And I know in 20s, 30s, maybe 40s, 50s, 70s, there'll always be a different thing of what does it mean to me to own my future. But I'd love to know at this phase of your life, I know you love coaching your son. I know you love being a dad. I know you love being home with your wife. I know you love being on stage impacting people, serving young kids. I know all the passions you have. But what does it mean to Trent Shelton to own your future?

That's such a deep, good question, Dean. And you're right. Different stages definitely brought out different answers with that. And I think the stage that I'm in right now, it's fulfillment right now in my life, because I think about my future. And one of the things that I'm so afraid of, just to be honest with you, is like getting to in my future and looking back and having regret, you know, because I Feel like either one or two things happen when you get to your future, wherever that is, 10 years, 20 years, next year, two months from now, you're either gonna rejoice or regret. And so I don't wanna look back and say, man, I gave all this permission to all these things outside of me to control me. I gave permission to the government, I gave permission to, you know, people's opinions. I gave permission to the algorithm on social media. And I just say, you know what? I'm going to start doing what I love with who I love as much as I can. And I know if I have that mindset now, that my future, when I get there, I'm going to rejoice. And so I'm all about legacy building. That's not just like what I leave to my kids, it's really what I leave to this world and how I want to live my life. And so I want to be able to get to 10 years from now, 20 years from now, towards the end of my life and look back and say, man, I did it how I want to do it. I did it my way, the right way, and I showed other people they could do the same thing. So that's what it means to me.

Yeah. You know, it's so funny, our mutual friend Ed Mylett, a lot of people say it a different way, but the same thing. You know, you don't want to get to the end of your life and meet the person you could have been or have regrets. But he said it once, and I believe he said it. He said, imagine at the end of your life, you meet your maker and he or she, whatever you believe, plays you the video of the man you could have been or the woman you could have been. And I just think about that and it's like that takes your breath away. Because let's be honest, some people are dreaming about something. There's people watching right this minute that are dreaming about something else. They're dying to take that step, start a business, start a new relationship, end a toxic one. But they're creating fears that are stopping them in their tracks. And I always think about, is that scarier? Or getting to the end of your life knowing you played small or didn't make those decisions scarier. How do you, how do you help yourself with those decisions?

Because you hit the nail on the head. Like there's. You can use fear for you. There's a positive fear. And the fear of me not living my life full out, the fear of me getting to my last days and. Or the Fear of me of getting to the end of this year, talking about the same goals that I didn't reach. Like, that scares me more than.

And that scares you more than fear.

The fear of going for it and failing like that. Because end of the day. And you know this, like, I think failure is nothing but the. The road to success, right?

Yeah.

And I think so many times we get so afraid in fear of failing, fear of not living up to the expectation, fear of embarrassment. That doesn't scare me no more. What scares me is getting to a point where I can't turn around and change anything and realizing that, dang, I really accepted my life and I really lived in this space. Now I'm here, and I can't do anything about it. I mean, you talk to. That's why I love having conversations with. Whether it be my grandparents, just older people, and they always say, either when they love life, I did life my way, or they say they regret and say, man, I wish I would have gave myself more permission. And I don't want to live in.

That's a common thread. Yeah.

I don't live in the wish I would haves. I want to live in. I'm glad I got to. I'm glad I tried. Yeah, I did that, and it sucked and it failed. Oh, well. But at least I got to experience that and do that, and I got to do the things that I wanted to do.

Yeah. No, I love that. You know, we're. We're both gonna be on an event with Matthew McConaughey coming up here in a little bit. Right. Depending on when you see this. It's his first live event ever, and I spent a week with him in our studio, and we did some amazing stuff together right here in this room. We did a podcast together, and one of the things when the camera was off, he's like, you know, one of my biggest fears is I wish I would have shared it on camera. He said the fear of not knowing. He's like, you see something, you see that opportunity, you go, should I go for that movie? Nah, they wouldn't pick me. I do rom coms. They wouldn't pick drama. You know, I'm not. He's like, no, no, no. I can't have any in my head, think the fear of not even trying, not knowing what the outcome. I'd rather go for it. And they say, hell, no, you're not. And then I know.

Exactly.

So I love that simple twist on. Kind of the same thing is the fear of not knowing. And how many of Us have wanted to go for that relationship or could we find intimacy or start the business or take the career to the next level. Something in your past stopped you from moving forward in the future, then the rest of your life. You don't know.

I've moved away from the idea of, of certain, like, traditional meanings of like what failure is. Like failure is when you. No, that's not failure. To me, failure is just when you don't do it, when you stay stagnant. And so what's helped me is like really controlling my meanings and how I define myself.

Wow, that's a really good way to.

So I don't look at the typical things of that's a loss. I'm like, no, I played sports enough. And I know for the fact, like if you talk to the Kansas City Chiefs, they're going to tell you that it's not the championship they're celebrating, it's the loss in the season that brought them together. That was the biggest moment in their season. So I realize now, no, it's not a loss. It's just, you know, a different way of me winning.

You know, I love the thought of redefining. I never, I never looked at it that way, but it's. If you give failure a different meaning, it changes everything. If failure is, hey, you're not good enough, see, your teachers was right, your parents were right, or failure is, well, I just figured out how not to do it or what can I learn from this? How can that be fueled to make sure next time I don't just same exact same circumstance, just a different definition.

Absolutely. It's like a door being closed with rejection. I don't look at rejection now as like, oh, I wasn't good enough, they didn't want me. I now say thank you because that opportunity wasn't meant for me. And so when I approach that, it just helps me take control of my life and control over my self esteem and my worth.

Yeah, I love that. Another question I thought about to ask you and I think from our years knowing each other, I think I know the moment, but I'm gonna let you share it, is was there a moment in your life or a moment in history when you decided to take complete ownership and let me elaborate a little bit in case it's not clear for everybody at home, maybe it's every generation. I just feel like we're in a time in life when there's a lot of finger pointing. I could be successful if it wasn't for the current president or the last president or the next president or the Congress, or my wife's holding me back, or technology is moving too fast. There's someone else's fault. I wrote these down. There's someone else to blame. Or I'm upset that no one's coming to save me.

That's right.

And I feel like I know when it is, but. And I know when it was. For me, there's nothing more liberating than the moment you say, it's on me. If I win, it's me. If I lose, it's me. It's nobody else's fault, nobody else's responsibility, Nobody else is going to save me. No more finger pointing. God gave me this journey, this life. I either take it forward and I use all that stuff as research and development and fuel, or I use it as my anchor. Was there a moment in your life? I'd love to hear that. And then how do you look through that lens of taking ownership?

I'm so curious what you think, what you think the moment is. I wonder if it's the same moment, but I call it the blame and complain mindset. Right. Bc, like we blame everything, we blame everybody. And I was in that place a lot in my life where it was everybody's fault. The moment for me, I believe there's probably a lot of moments, but me getting cut.

Yeah, that's what I thought.

Yeah. Me getting cut from the NFL, because at that moment I realized, like, I'm not gonna give anybody control to be able to say when I, you know, if I have a job or not, or dictate how I feel about myself, my self esteem and my worth. And that was the moment where I said, you know, I'm taking complete ownership over my life and I'm gonna make it on me. I'm gonna put it on me. If I completely fail and fall off the face of the earth. Cool. At least I know I did it daringly. It's on me. But if I can make this thing happen, which I believe that I could and I did, it's on me. And so, yeah, I got sick and tired of living. You know, people don't understand this about professional sports. And I'll just say this, like, just imagine you see the superstars, right? That's the very minimal percent. But you have a majority of players that are literally living in fear every single day. So every day I would wake up, I wouldn't know if I would be in that same city the next day.

Wow.

I would go to practice and get fired coming off the field. And I said, I don't want to live life like that. And so many people watching this. It might not be sports, but so many people are in positions where they're living life just like that. It might be a boss or it might be this or that. And I know, you know, we got to have jobs and things, but if you're a person that's complaining about where you're at, if you're a person that says, man, I want to change my life and do something, then you have to be able to say, it's on me. I'm not going to put on everybody else, and I'm going to give myself permission to and take the permission away from them to control my life.

Okay, I had to jump in here real quick. Is this interview amazing? It gets even better. And if you love Trent like I do, then you're going to want to listen up. On April 24, depending on when you're listening to this, we're doing a live event with Matthew McConaughey, Trent Shelton, myself, Tony Robbins, Marie Forleo. It's called the Art of Living. And you can go reserve your spot and attend for free. You're not going to want to miss this. Go to Livin L I v I n2023.com. That's living without the g2023.com. Reserve your spot, and when you're done, why not send the link to a friend or two, and let's really make this amazing. Okay, back to the interview with Trent Shelton. Yeah, I love that. And I just. I remember the moment it was watching my parents, who I loved dearly. But a lot of times in life, it was, God, if it was different, if the economy was different, if we had a Republican or if we had a Democrat. Right. Whatever side you're on, if we had this, things would get better. And I think without realizing, we fall into that trap of there always could be something else, or I could be resourceful rather than have resources.

Right.

I wasn't born with money. I wasn't born. You know, we all have our own journey. But I think. And I know how you parent Tristan. He's in. What grade is he in now?

Seventh grade.

Seventh grade? Yeah. Him and Brody are the same age. They got along good. Brody still asks about Tristan, by the way. We gotta make that connection happen again. But I would bet to say, and I wanna transition a little bit. If you could leave him anything, resources, leave him 10 million bucks, or leave Tristan being unbelievably resourceful, which one would you choose?

Resourceful?

Yeah. I Mean, I know it's an obvious. It's a softball question, but. But I really want people to hear that because how come so many people hit lotto and go broke? We talked about trust fund kids. Like, I've never met somebody with a trust fund that's kind of got a happy life. I just haven't yet. I'd love to. If you're one of them, please let us know. Right. But I met a lot of people that had to find the resourcefulness to work and journey and grow. And that's why I would love to give that gift. So if you're sitting there thinking, yeah, but, Dean Trent, you don't know my circumstance. We don't. And I'm sorry if you're going through a tough time, but what if you decided if you don't have the resources, if you don't have support from your spouse, you don't have the money right now to start the own business? Resourcefulness will always outdo resources.

Always.

When you went, I mean, think, let's just back up a little bit. I love 60 million people a week are impacted by you. But let's just talk about. You're an NFL guy that was in football his whole life. You made your dream, you played at Ballard, you crushed it. You made the NFL your whole life dream. And then one day it's gone for good. And then I'm sure people are like, what's he doing now? He's doing videos on Facebook. Like, I can imagine the guys on your team saying, yo, yo, yo, since Trent got fired.

Exactly.

He's doing Facebook videos and something called rehab time. Oh, my God, like, thousand percent. And that moment, you could have said, I'm a football player, I don't have the resources. I don't know anybody in this space. Never done videos. I don't have a fancy camera. I don't have a big studio, man. There's no way. This is stupid. Right? But you found a way to be resourceful. So what advice would you give to somebody who's feeling like, I just don't have a. I'm just not dealt a hand, man. I want to do what you guys are doing. I want to go to another level, but I just not dealt the right hand.

Yeah, you have to create a meaning, some people call it. Why? Deep rooted reason that's bigger than your emotions. And what I mean by that is, you know, if my emotions got in the way of what I'm doing now, I would have been stopped. I would have stopped when I pressed live. And two People showed up. I would have stopped when I did my first events, and it was literally people who felt sorry for me there. I would have stopped when people were laughing at me saying, oh, you're doing that. You're doing that little rehab time thing. I would have stopped. But it was bigger than my emotions because I had a commitment deep enough. And to a friend that committed suicide and to myself and to people that I know needed this. That's what it was for me. And so I would challenge everybody watching. This is what's your deep rooted reason and is it deep enough in your emotions? Because if you're always controlled by circumstances, it's not real enough for you.

Yeah, true.

You know it's not. And so circumstances never control me. Yes. I went through my moments where so good. I. I questioned and I. I wanted to give up, but it's gotten to a point now where, you know, when circumstances happen, it's just circumstances because I know if I continue to weather the storm, I. The storm shall pass at some point.

Yeah.

And I'll continue to grow.

I love that. I love that. So you kind of alluded a little bit to it before, but I want to see if there's something, you know, in today's world, the trending term is imposter syndrome.

Yeah, right.

It's just, you're scared for sure. Self doubt. I'm afraid, what if I fail? Like, we can call it whatever we want. It's been there since the beginning of time. What's something that most people wouldn't know about you when they see what you're doing? The impact you have, the family man you are coaching on a field, supporting Tristan and his evolution and all your family as you were growing your business. And I know you said some of it, but is there something you haven't shared that you worried about when no one was watching? And I'm not that good at this, or I'm not that good of a speaker, or I don't know how to run business or it can't work for me because of where I've come from. What is it?

Oh, so much of what you just said, like, and that still comes up sometimes.

Me too.

It still comes up. Am I good enough? Am I even now, like, do people still want to watch me? Like, am I still going to grow? But starting off, it was. Well, most things people don't know. I've talked about it, but I deal with a little bit of social anxiety. So I'm like, how can I be in this space where I'm in front of people, talking to people. When I have this, you know, not a disability, but I have this thing that I'm dealing with that literally when I'm around a whole group of people, I feel very uncomfortable. So how can I do this? Also with imposter syndrome, you know.

I.

Want to break this down a little bit, because we think of imposter syndrome sometimes, and it's different, but, you know. Or am I good enough? But there was a time in my journey, and still now, where I feel as if, you know, I'll get around environments, and I'm like, man, like, these people work harder than me. And how am I in this position? Am I not supposed to be here? Is it luck? Is it this? Is it that? How am I here? And I realized this, man. And I don't know if this is a. You know, I don't know if it's just one of my wild takes, but I sat back one day and I said, kind of. He talked about that was natural with you, with your marketing, I'm sure. I don't know because you work hard, but I'm sure it's people out there that probably like that kill themselves to understand what you understand. But it's just a gift to you.

Yeah.

And I realized this with myself, is that maybe it seems so effortlessly and easy because this is your gift.

Wow.

This is your gift.

Wow. Yeah.

You know, and so now I've looked at it differently. Not that I don't work hard or whatever like that, but I don't have imposter syndrome no more because I'm actually walking in my gift. So, yes, it's going to seem so natural and so fluent and so easy, and it's not going to be forced because it's what I was called to do. And so that's really helped me deal with imposter syndrome a lot, because it still comes up like, this person's, like, studying all these things, reading all these books, and I'm not doing that. And I'm like, man, am I supposed to be where I'm at? Then I said, man, this is actually. You are. Because this is your journey, your gift.

And your journey.

And my journey, exactly.

Influence.

Yeah.

Sales, persuasion, whatever you want to call it. And I know our relationship, and I know how you feel about sales when you first started, and now I know how it's evolved to service. When you write a book, if somebody buys your book, you're serving them. They get to change their life because of your books. They're amazing. If you build a Course, you're serving them by getting them to raise their hand and say yes. Right. I was there when you filmed one of your first courses. I watched you do it. I'm like, the world needs more, Trent. Let's get you creating something. And people have different perceptions of selling. Some people like, I love it. I get to serve. It's like one of my things. I love selling. When I'm selling something I love. I love promoting you. Today, I'm going to push everybody to go to your social and follow you. I'm going to sell you on this guy, because this guy will take your life from where you are to where you want to be in so many levels. So especially if you're watching them and you vibe. So I have no. It's like selling a good movie to a friend or a good book or a good meal to a friend. It's like, I'm doing you a disservice if I don't introduce you to Trent, if you don't already know him, which you probably do. So there's that feeling, but then there's. I know the feeling when you first start. It's like, I just want to help people. Is it wrong to offer? Right? But your business is growing and you get paid a lot of money to be on stages. You're in high demand. You only do 15 or so a year. You could probably do 50 a year. And what you get for an hour is amazing. And it's all deserved. You have courses, you have books. What's one way, if you could think it doesn't have to be perfect. What's one way you've sold? Persuaded, influenced. Your business wouldn't grow. Sales are the oxygen of every company. No matter what anybody says. It's like, no, it's just gonna go viral. No, it's not. Right. It doesn't matter how many videos you have go viral if you don't ask them to come to an event, if you don't ask them to buy your book, they're not coming. Right. So what's a way that you've been able to impact through service, through sales, through influence, where it's worked with you or it's aligned with you?

Yeah, well, it's fully. This is a deep question, but.

I know it is. I know it is.

It's being fully. Number one, is immersed in my community and immersed in my audience. And what I mean by that is being able to give them so much value. Like, so much value. And I always hear you in the back of my head, like, you're doing a disservice if you don't give them the next thing. If you don't give them the next thing, they're gonna find the next thing from someone else. Do you want someone else? Do you trust someone else?

They might not love your students as much or your followers as much as you do.

Exactly. And so that's really helped me be able to find the confidence in all these negative beliefs and limiting beliefs of selling. And I realized, too, that so many of my supporters, they've asked for more. And once I started to give them more, and I realized, like, wait a minute, like, this is really impacting their life. Because inspiration, you know, and being inspired is one thing, but when you have somebody be immersed in a product and what you do, that's when they become transformed and impacted. And so I was able to see that just for the little bit, even when I started with you. So I said, man, I want to create more of these things. And it's really, man, I think the selling part is really me believing in what I'm selling so much that it becomes contagious to them. And they say, man, I have to have this. You brought it up in there. When I first started selling whatever, like a program, I was kind of like, ah, you know, if you want, if.

You want, but you don't really have to.

And I'm like, I wouldn't buy that. You know, like, I should be proud of this. Like, I put in the work in this, like, my retreats. Like, I know the transformation that happens. And so just by having that energy and telling them, giving this opportunity, space for them to be able to transform and change their life, it's allowed me to bring more confidence because you need this. And if you don't get it, I feel sorry for you. Not in the way of, like, if you can't afford it, but you need to be in this, because I understand what it's going to do for your life if you step into this transformation.

And the cool part, especially this industry, we're both in the same industry, right? What I love about this industry is you have a free podcast. You go live on social, you have videos that you produce. You pay money for every single week. You're paying money to produce a video that changes lives. So it's not like you can only get Trent if you pay. It's like, there is a lot of free Trent, but if you watch it, if you're like me, you go, damn, this is good. What's next?

What's next, right?

And sometimes It's a book. And you go, damn, this book was good. What's next, right? And again, if you don't have that evolution, they're gonna go, oh, he ran out here. I need a course on confidence. The way. Course. Who else teaches it? Like. Like Trent. And they're going to go get someone else to sell, right? And you know, so many times you've been. We've been in masterminds together. The mastermind we do with Brendan and everybody. I drug you to that in the mountains. You didn't want to go.

I didn't.

You did not want to go, right? But you know, the questions I always get is like, man, what is. How do you sell so good, right? And I think. And they're a smart group and they get it. But in a group of newer people in this world, I think they're thinking, I'll be like, oh, hold on. Oh, here it is. Say this one thing and the sales come flooding in. The answer I always give. And I know this might sound a little corny to some people or a little, but man, fall in love with your clients. Not kind of like them. Like, you fall in love with people and then you fall in love with the results. And the only thing, if you love them and you love what you do and you love their results, then the only thing left to do is fall in love with the product. And then the last thing is you have to fall in love with selling. Because if you love them and you have a product that can help them, the only thing you can do is fall in love with servicing them. And once that shift, and I'm so glad to just answer that, I didn't tell you I was answering that question. In fact, I haven't told Trent anything I'm asking him today. But there's so many people watching that when that switches. And I've just watched it for years. I watched it with you. I watched it with Jay Shetty. Jay gives me credit for shifting into providing more Tom Bilyeu. I love how Tom will give me credit. Like, dude, I never thought. And still to this day, it's him. Tom did it all on his own. You did it on your own. Jay did it on your own. I am not taking credit for any of your success. But if I could be that little voice that says, you gotta serve, you gotta serve. I mean, look at Tom Bilyeu. He built Quest Bar, sold it. He's got all this knowledge and he's like, do you think anybody really wants? I'm like, I want it. I Want it, please serve, sell it to me. Right? And now it's one of the most important parts of his business and he's changing people's lives. Oh, my God. So thanks for sharing that. And then I would say we're both, like I said, in the same business in the self education industry. You call it any industry, that information, self education, knowledge industry really is. We learn stuff and then we help people get there faster by filling the gap in their life. What's your favorite part about this industry? About what you do?

I love the transformation journey with people. You know, I love being able to give somebody an idea or, like I said, a product or even if it's a speech and see them grab that little moment, that little. It could be a video. To see them grab that little thing and that little seed that's been planted turns into a whole harvest in their life. Like when people come back to me and say, it happens all the time. Trent, I've been following you since you were doing your tours in 2016, 17, which you didn't know that you were teaching me how to do all these things, these little seeds. Now look at my life. I'm a successful here. I broke away from this, and so that's my most favorite thing. And also, too selfishly realizing that my pain in my past and my failure had purpose. So now I look back and say, oh, okay, there was a reason why I went through this. It wasn't just for me, because we talk about purpose. We think purpose is just for ourselves. No, purpose is for other people to benefit off of also. So that's the cool part, too, because even when I go through things now, I said, okay, I'm learning something now that's going to be the driving force of somebody else.

Exactly. And it really does change. When you're going through something crazy or really difficult, it changes your perception. It doesn't mean it makes it easier. But you're like, wow, there's a purpose for this. And I can't wait to help other people. I want to ask you one thing on that. Going into this industry, a lot of times people get clouded and say, well, I played in the NFL. I'm not really an expert on motivation. I'm not Tony Robbins, I'm not Deepak Chopra. I'm not Dale Carnegie or someone like that. How did you overcome that of thinking? Did you ever think of that part? I'm not the expert. Why the hell am I even doing this?

Absolutely.

And then how'd you overcome it?

Yeah, I definitely did. I definitely lived in comparison, a bit. I definitely was like, oh, I can't be these guys, and I'm not these guys. And I told myself one day that I'm not supposed to be.

Ah, that's cool.

I'm not supposed to be. And when you realize that, and I talk about this all the time, that, you know, we, each and every. All of us, we have a gift inside of us. And I always say I tell this all the time. My grandmother told me that we're all called to reach certain people. And until you open up your gift and give it to the world, you're doing a word of disservice, never going to get your gift. And so, yes, Tony's amazing. You're amazing. All these people are amazing. But we're all called to reach different people. Sometimes it overlaps. But there's somebody out there waiting for Trent Shelton to walk into his purpose because literally, they're going to benefit off of my story and off of my life. So the person watching this right now, you might say, oh, I can't speak like Trent, you're not supposed to. I can't think like that. You're not supposed to. You can take from those things, but there's a you inside of you. And I always say, God gave you a vision that's just for you. And when you really understand that and really get confidence in that, that's when it changes for you. That's when it changed for me. When I stopped trying to be everybody else, I still took from people like, okay, cool. I like how he does that. How can I apply that to my life?

But when I. It still came out of your filter.

There you go. I would say, too, also, just the consistency. As I continue to show up over and over and over over the years, I begin to have confidence and knowing that, too, people are benefiting off of this. So when I got my first few inboxes, that says, Trent, like, I just watched your live, I was one of the two people, and it changed my life. And I was like, wait a minute. Okay, I do have something special. So once you get that spark of I have something special, I mean, that's when you put the lighter to. It blows up.

And what I love about the consistency part is I know when you first started doing videos, you said it was like, mom, cousin, couple, right? But then there was five, and then there was 50, and now, shit, 60 million people on a weekly basis. It's incredible. All right, this one's a little deeper. I'm gonna shift here. You know, there's different phases of our lives. And throughout life, if you're human, you're gonna be dealt blows. Whatever you wanna consider that blows. Uncomfortable situations, horrific situations. And it's not a question. You're like, hey, Dean, so positive today. It's not a question if we're gonna be dealt crap, it's are we gonna be prepared to deal with it, right? Jim Rohn always said, you know, for things to get better, you gotta get better, right? To handle bigger problems, we have to do the work to be able to handle bigger problems. Because they're gonna come and I'd love to know. I'm gonna share a couple things. Only because, you know, because we've been friends for so long, is there's a bunch. There's some things in your life, right? Cut from the NFL. You shared that before your daughter. Neighbors mowing, the lawn, rock comes across, hits her in the head. Thank you for sharing that with me. Right away when it happened, and we were praying for her, right? You didn't know in a moment you're carrying her into the hospital, right? I know how close you were with your mom, right? And I watched you. I prayed for you consistently when you were going through that. Your mom was such a big part of your life. And you lost your mom recently. Not as big as your daughter getting hit with a rock or losing your mom, but your Achilles, right, is that you tore your Achilles and it wasn't just light. I mean, you were messed up, ruptured. We're all going to be dealt with stuff. And sometimes people don't see that part. They don't see the human side. They see a video of yours with 100 million views go, damn lucky bastard. Or like, ah, man, he must not be dealing with. I'm dealing. For you to handle those things, still be here today, still focused, still focusing on tomorrow, still focusing on a bigger future. Any one of those would have been a good enough excuse to say, worked my whole life, got cut. I'm out. My daughter did this, man, the world's not fair. I'm out. Lost my mom. How could that happen? I'm out, right? My Achilles and I can't walk. I'm going on stage, in the little chair thing. I'm out. Any one of those. And a lot of people would have given you, like, hey, I get it, right? For you to stay in the game and you to continue to grow, what was a mindset shift that you could help people with that allowed you to. Doesn't mean you weren't in pain. It doesn't mean you didn't feel depressed, doesn't mean you didn't feel sad. But you're on the other side. And I think that would be a great gift to give some people right now.

Yeah, man. It's deep. So 1. I burned the bridge a long time ago of going back and quitting. It doesn't. I always say I don't bring a towel to throw in no more, so it's not an option for me.

I love that. I just bring a towel.

Yeah, I don't. I don't even. Cause if I have it, I'm gonna reach for it. So, like, I burned the bridge of going back quitting a long time ago, and I signed up forever, you know, for. For this mission and for this work. But yes, a lot of those things were tough. And it's still hard, you know, I mean, I'm still recovering from my Achilles. It was like year after year back to back to back. But the thing that has helped me in the mindset shift. I always talk about this. I shift my perspective. It could be your prison or your power.

Okay.

And a prison perspective is why, why, why, why, why, why this happened to me. A power perspective is saying, thank you. Right? So as hard as it is, thank you. So when I first turned my Achilles, you know what I said, Dean, thank you. I didn't say, why did this happen to me? I said, thank you for giving me some time to sit down.

Wow.

When my mother left, as hard as it was, I didn't say, why did you take her? I said, thank you for giving her peace. And so in my life, I've learned more than ever to say thank you for things, because all things are working together for our good. Right? Are working for us. You know the great quote, right? And that's really helped me. And so I have three things, man. I say, you know, when things happen in your life, because you're right, you can't control the experiences, things are going to happen. I would say this too. Like, where do you think the stuff comes from? Like, we just don't talk just because it sounds good. Like this experience that you're hearing. These are things that I go through. So I help you with so many things because how I probably went through those things, but this is how I think about it, and I'm prepared when anything happens. I ask myself three questions. Number one, how am I going to respond? Right. I already have predetermined not reacting. I'm going to respond with. I'm going to respond with power. I'm going to see the goodness in every situation because I'm going to find the thing that serves my life. We're in control of our meanings. Like, we can control that. We're in control of our perspectives. We can easily say, this interview is boring. This interview is great. Like, both people are right, whatever. But we're in control of that. The second thing is, I'm asking myself is, what does this mean to me? Right? What is this going to mean? Right? What is the meaning to this? Power, perspective. The third thing is, how am I going to use this?

Wow.

So life is not about what happens to you. It's about how you respond, what it means, and how you use it. In a simple shift, man, with perspective that I always. And sometimes it's hard as hell to do it. I don't ask no more. Like, what does this mean? Because usually we get into our past, we get into the things that happened to us in our, you know, back in the day, and we come off our experiences and we say, oh, this means that, oh, you know, somebody didn't choose me. Oh, NFL meant I wasn't good enough. Oh, this means I'm not good enough, Right? So this simple shift, and I want people to get this instead of saying, what does this mean? What is this going to me? And in that simple shift, wow, that's subtle. That simple shift, you take power out of the situation and you put power in your life. So now I can say, oh, okay, they didn't choose me. That means that, you know what? Maybe I was being protective or something with my life. I can choose whatever it means. But now I'm in control of my situation and my mindset and my perspective. And so that's a big part of protecting your peace. But I would say one of the principles is you have to shift your perspective. And that is my go to, what is this going to mean? And I determine that. So this. It means that, you know what? I'm going to be greater at so many things because I can sit down, and when I do get back up, I'm going to appreciate even the love to walk. Like, I know this seems simple, but I love to walk now. And there's a great quote. I don't know if you've seen it, but it's like, the man that loves the walk will actually go further than the man that loves the destination. And so for me, yeah, for me, that's what it's been, man. And so I would just challenge people with your perspective is like, no more. What does this mean? Say, what is this going to mean? And watch how that changes your life.

What is this going to mean?

Yep. What is this going to mean? Yep. And you can determine.

Because when you're. Because when you're in it, sometimes it's a little cloudy.

Yeah.

So if you just add that word, what is it going to mean? It's like, it might be a little cloudy now. It might be hard that I can't walk right now, Might be sad right now, but what is this going to mean? And also, what am I going to do with it?

Yep.

Right.

Because even in business, right, you might have a thing where you launch something and you know it doesn't do well. And most people would say, what does this mean? Well, logically, it means that we didn't do well.

We failed.

We're not good enough. We fail. But if you say, what is this going to mean? This means that we're gonna figure out something better. We're gonna create something greater. You know what I mean? So, like, shift in perspective helps a lot, brother.

I love the way you think so much. That's why to this day, if you know, Trent will speak on most all of our stages, I always invite you. If you got time, you're invited, right? Like I said, we're doing this McConaughey Live event together, which is gonna be amazing. But. But still, to this day, when I watch you every single time, I watch every second, in awe. And I mean that. It's really. It's fun watching you grow. And you're pulling us with you as you grow. You're not regurgitating an old speech. You take what's going on in your life. You're at a new phase. You share that new phase. And I think that's why so many people follow you and should. And where's the best place for people? We're not done yet. But where's the best place for people to find you?

Rent Shelton. That's all socials, Instagram, TikTok, Facebook, all the spots.

And I'll just tell you right now, follow him immediately. If he gets a book, get his book. If he does a live event, you can go. Go to the live event. I promise you'll thank us. All right, I want to shift it up a little bit. We all have our unique abilities, core competencies, whatever you want to call it. There's times I hit you up and say, hey, man, how does this. How do you do this with. To go viral? And you'll say, hey, how do I get people at my live event? And all those things you got anything you want to ask me while we're here? We talked about that the last time we were together. And if you got something in any niche or something that I could serve you.

Yes, That's a deep question. Oh, man. So much I want to ask you. The thing that comes to me because I'm going to use this as a selfish thing, you know. I know, yeah, you guys can benefit off this also. But I've always been amazed on how you're able to take something. Like, I've seen you get into new companies. I see you start something, like from scratch. And you are a person that I call, like just a builder. You, you know how to build things, you know how to grow things, you know how to bring revenue to things. You know how to put things into the green. You know how to take things from here and bring them here. Like, what's your mindset and process? Like, if you have one, like when you're starting from scratch, building something or trying to bring something from a comeback, like, what is that?

Really good question. Really good question. And again, we could go down a lot of roads, so I'll try to keep it to one lane because there's a lot of answers. Right. But one thing I know that I do, Trent, and I was sharing this with you earlier. We didn't have time. We had to come. We decided to come here and do this interview together. And maybe when we're done here, we'll spend a little more time. But I want to give the benefit of the doubt of this question right now is the first thing I looked at is what is the ideal outcome for the people that are going through your organization, your group, if they go to your retreats or they buy your book or they get your course or whatever company, any company that you have, I always look what is the ideal outcome, not what they get? So I'm going to try to narrow this down to a couple minutes. But so many times people get, yeah, but I give them this and they get this and they get. Whether you're selling cars or a course or coaching or real estate, it's like, what are they going to get and how are they going to feel? What is their outcome, I should say, and how are they going to feel? What is the ideal result? So I'll always start with the ideal result and how they're going to feel. And if I don't feel it's a 10 out of 10. I can't help somebody sell something unless you absolutely, you know, I love helping you anywhere I can Because I know if people get your book, follow you on social, their lives will be positively impacted. I will sell for you, I will put for you. I will sell your book when your books come out, I hold pictures, I do emails, I push. Because I know people are just going to go, thank you. Right. So it's easy for me to do that with you. But if somebody, if you don't love what you do completely, if you don't feel bad, if people don't get it, I'm going to tell you, focus on the product outcome and how people feel when they use it. So now let's. So that'll be the first time there's a company I'm working with right now. The first thing we did is we took what they delivered to a whole other level. They, the whole team, the owner of the company, like, oh my God, now I love it. Okay. Now isn't it easier to sell something that you love?

Absolutely.

If you kinda like it, you kinda sell. If, you know, if someone doesn't get this in their hands, I'm screwing them over, that's a different feeling. So what I'll tell you is I fall in love with the make sure that they love or I love the client, then I love the products we're providing. Once that's done, it's kind of off my plate. What I'll do more than most is I'll focus on how to sell it. I'll go all in on the marketing. And even as I create product or services, I'm like, this might be a great product, but is it saleable? Because I can't serve people, I can't grow a company unless it's sellable. Sometimes people build things that are so complicated or they build things they think people need rather than what they want. So I hope this answer helps. First is product. You're there, you got great products. Then I skip over everything and I would just say, rule of thumb, double or triple the amount of focus you're putting on marketing and sales. Like right now, I'd say to you, I just talked about it and we'll talk more later. You gotta double it and you gotta think through what efforts am I doing today that can help people lead to a sale? And if you're just selling crap, then that's an evil thing. If you're selling something that's great, then that's a great thing. If not, they're gonna buy it from somebody else. So I, probably, more than anyone you'll ever meet, I will focus on the marketing. That's why I asked you how you sell. I'll focus on the sales. I'll focus on the influence and how I could serve people to get them to say yes. And as simple as that sounds, most companies, especially as they grow, will lose that part. When they first started, they had a sale. They had a sale to eat. And now all of a sudden they got CRMs and customer support and a human resource department. They got a personal assistant and they got this, and they got business meetings. And all of a sudden you get clouded in the minutia of a business and they forget that it all starts with a sale. It all starts with a yes. I mean, I always say, look at you walk in the Barnes and Noble, hundreds of thousands of books. You ever go to a two or three story Barnes and Noble? It's awe inspiring to see all these books. 80% of the books in that room sell less than a thousand copies.

Wow.

The 20% that sell over 1,000, 80% of them sell less than 5,000 copies. Think of the work and energy somebody put in the mental thoughts to get all that stuff done. And then they got done with the book and they said, oh, it's amazing. It'll sell. And it doesn't. And I truly believe most people with their companies, they're building the product, they're building something to go viral. They're building something out of passion. And they go, yeah, I'll sell it when time allows. Shift your focus, focus on the sale. Know you're delivering something good. And just by doubling your focus on that changes the trajectory of a business.

You know what you always said, and it sticks with me. If you build it, doesn't mean they're gonna come.

They ain't coming. That's Kevin Costner's line.

Yeah. And it's so true. Because you're right. Like you think about any. Any service, like, there's a ton of marketing and a ton of selling. You can have the best thing. I know people have great things, you know, even my friends, I'm like, man. But they have nobody knows about it or they have no marketing behind it.

And a lot of people think, oh, it'll catch on and go viral. No, it won't. Sorry. I hate to be the bearer of bad news. All right, last thing. Rent Shelton. Go find this guy. This was just a glimpse of what this man does. He's got some cool things coming up. We'll be together on Matthew McConaughey's event. Don't miss that. Follow him, do whatever he's got going on. I'm saying do it. Lastly, last question I want to ask is, who would you like to thank today? Someone in your life.

Oh, man. Well, can I have a few?

Yeah, of course.

Okay. One, you. And I'm not just saying this because I'm sitting in front of you, but you know, this. What you do to the world and how you help the world, how you help me, I can speak for myself. I truly admire it, man. And I've been around a lot of amazing people, but you top the list with that, bro. And I really mean that. Outside of yourself, you know, I always gotta send a shout out just to my father. You know, I wanna thank him for sure. Cause my dad, when I look as I'm being a father, I realize how special he still is and was to us.

Wow.

And I get around. I'm like, this wasn't normal. And I took it for granted. And now more than ever, like, I'm really appreciated. So I always shouted out mom. But I want to shout out to my dad.

That's really awesome, man. Put tears in my eyes because you make me think of my kids. There's a lot of things you do for Tristan right now. He's going to be 27 and go. I love that story. When you say your kids, when they finally have kids and the kids are like five, you call your parents and say, thank you and I'm sorry.

Sorry. Yeah, exactly.

I'm sorry. I feel like someday with the effort we're putting in our kids, they're going to be 20s, 30s, and be like, dad, thanks. And I'm sorry.

Absolutely.

So shout out to your dad. Thank you so much, brother. It's good to have you here. Thanks for sharing from your heart. You always do. You guys, Trent jumped on a plane, flew here to do this for you. This is yours. If you loved it, share it. Get this to go viral because more people need to hear about this guy and know about him. Thank you for being a part of Own youn Future podcast. See you next time.

Appreciate it, brother.

It was good.

Always so smooth with you, man.

One last time. I know you loved that interview. If you want more Trent Shelton, then go to livein2023.com and reserve your spot for the Art of Living Live event with Matthew McConaughey, Tony Robbins, myself, Trent Shelton, and Marie FORLEO. It's on April 24th. It's going to be amazing. Depending on when you're listening, hurry and go. Reserve your spot. Living without the G L I v I n 2023 dot com.