The 3 Shocking Habits of HIGHLY Successful People
18 Nov 2020 · 27 min
Dean Graziosi presents three surprising habits for achieving massive success: (1) forgiveness — freeing emotional energy through forgiving others (illustrated by a baseball anecdote about his son and a coach), (2) relentless focus on marketing and sales — pairing a superior product with outstanding marketing techniques, and (3) abandoning Plan B — committing fully to a single goal ("burn the boats"). The episode blends personal stories with tactical selling tips and mindset guidance, closing with calls-to-action to subscribe and share.
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Could forgiveness actually be one of the core components, Habits, rules for massive success? If you don't focus on marketing and sales, most likely you'll fail. Welcome to the Dean Graziosi show. All success starts right here. Forgiveness is one of those things that no one would ever consider as being a success habit. Nevertheless, a millionaire success habit. What the hell does forgiveness have to do with it? It's foo foo. I want the tactical money making stuff, right? I want to get to the nitty gritty. But here's what I know. There's only a certain amount of time in a day. There's only a certain amount of energy in a day. And not even just time and energy. The clarity of creative thinking compared to the clarity of busy thinking. Listen, you might have time, you're squeezing it in to think about your bigger future, your bigger business, making more money. But if you don't have clarity in those thoughts, if your heart isn't open, then the universe, God, whatever you believe in, the marketing geniuses, the marketing inspiration doesn't funnel down into the top of your head and come out of your mouth. And without marketing and creativity, then what do you have? Without the planning to follow through, without the stamina to get over the hurdles when shit goes sideways, what do you have? You have a good idea. Everybody's got a good idea. You're listening to me right now. Not just because you want some magic money machine. You want the foundation for wealth and sustainability and success. If I'm. If I'm wrong, then I apologize. Maybe you're looking for the quick hit, but how long does that work? Even people who hit the lotto go broke on average, right? So what the heck does forgiveness have to do with success? Everything. I think forgiveness is one of the most underutilized. Not just words, but things in our. In our world, in. In our ability to grow as a human. I want to give you an example. The reason this is on top of my head is my son, who just two nights ago when I'm recording this, won the state championship for their 10 year old division of baseball, which was so awesome. So watching him, he did great. They did awesome. But I want to back up. My son has been on the same team since he was 4 years old, the same coach. Love this guy. He's one of the greatest guys. His wife is amazing. He's amazing, loves kids and they play twice a year, so they pretty much play all year round. He coaches the all star team too. So he plays spring ball, fall ball, and summer all stars. So he's pretty much with this guy all year round. And he's got a son named Dean, same name as me. And I love Dean. I always tease him. I said, that's my name. I had it first. You're Bob. So when I get there, he's always like, no, you're Bob. But in the last six months, Dean's changed. Dean has been mean, he's been a bully, and especially to my son Brody. And I think it's a competitive thing. Dean is good, Brody's better. Brody's bats first. Every Brody's nine on the 10, 11 year old team and he still bats first. Probably the best average on base of anybody on the team. Not because he's my son, he's just good. He's small, but he's good and he's a hustler. But in the last six months, Dean has been really tough on Brody. So I don't want to just solve this for my son. I want him to figure it out on his own. So I keep saying, hey, you got to stand up for yourself. I say, hey, you know, how does that make you feel? Make sure you realize that that's his opinion. That's not who you are. Like all the stuff fundamentally out of the book, doing it right, trying to empower my son because I'm not going to always be there to protect him. Right. Well, the last All Star game, as we were building up to the, we had the semifinals, my son gets up, goes 4 for 4 in the dugout. Dean comes up to my son because Dean is sitting. There's only one person sitting. My son is smaller than him. My son is younger than him and his dad is the coach and he's sitting on the bench. He comes up to my son, he says, you suck at hitting and you're dumb. And my son said, you're dumb for saying that. I asked him exactly what he said and Dean smacked my son in the face. Well, Brody comes out of my son's Brody. Brody comes out of the dugout with a tear in his eye and his face red. I said, what happened? He said, dean just smacked me. And listen, if you're a parent, you know exactly what happened. The hair on the back of my neck stood up and I wanted to go kick a 10 year old's ass. I just be honest, like I wanted to go in there and choke him and say, did you lay a hand on my son? I did walk up to him and I said, I wanted to know if it was. I said, did you just hit my son? And he didn't say. I said, did you just hit my son? He said, yes. I said, okay. I said, go apologize to him. That's all I said. I went up and talked to his mom. I was furious. I was shaking on the inside because I know what my emotions want to do. I knew it was right. So why am I telling you this whole story? How does it relate to you? I promise you it does. So I went home that night, and I was so mad, so upset. But I had the chance to teach a lesson to Brody, and I hated the feeling I had. I was mad at Mike. Who's the greatest guy in the world, greatest dad. His son's going through something. Somebody's probably picking on Dean. And we found out that's true. So I sat. I originally I emailed Mike. I said, mike, you're a great coach. We love your family, but it's unacceptable that your son put his hand on my son. And it's been six months I've been trying to get Brody to stand up for himself. Brody will play the All Star Game, and then we're out. We're done. Mike replied back as a good. The good man he is, and said, I'm embarrassed as a coach, and I failed as a father. I should have seen this. I should have known. I wish I knew sooner. And he dug in, and he got it. So why am I telling you? Because that night, I sat with my son, and I didn't like the way it felt to have anger. I didn't like the way it felt to be mad. And I said, buddy, the greatest word I know. I wish I knew it sooner, is forgiveness. Dean's been a good kid. Mike's an amazing dad. What if we just forgave them? What if we gave them a second chance? What if you want to forgive them? I'd like you to stay on the team, but it's totally up to you. He goes, no, Mike's been good to me. I want to stay on the team. Let's forgive them. Kind of paraphrasing our conversation. So I email Mike. We go back to the practice. Mike, the coach, walks up to me with his head down, literally with a tear in his eye, and he said, your son. And I'm not saying this because my boy, but he said, my son's the sweetest boy you've ever met in your life. Sweet voice. He's not aggressive. He might not make it in high school baseball because he's so not aggressive. He's sweet. He's just kind. And Mike says to me, I'm not just saying this. Your son is my favorite kid I've coached in 10 years. Your son is the reason I coach. I love that kid. I. My son writes the coach thank you notes. That's my son. He busts my chops sometimes, but he's amazing to everybody else. So Mike comes up, and I said, mike, how about this? It's past. It's behind us. Hopefully Dean can learn from it. We appreciate everything you've done, and we really love you guys. Thank you. And let's move on from here. Let's get to practice. And he had a tear in his eye, and he was like, I don't understand if that was my son and someone did that to my son, I couldn't even look at me. I'd want to fight me. He's like, I wish I could let go of things like that. He goes, I probably pulled his hat off because I'm probably bald, because I worry about all the stuff people have done to me. I said, I promise you, I'm not just saying that. That's our family. We're done. Forgiveness has happened. Brody. Brody goes out. I could cry now. I could have tears in my eye. Brody goes out and grabs Dean and says, hey, let's play catch. I look out, these two. Dean is so sorry that he's out there playing with Brody, saying, good catch, Brody. So awesome. Brody, I can't wait to watch you hit today, Brody. You're gonna crush it today, Brody. My son was smiling from ear to ear. Mike wipes the tears from his eyes, shakes my hand. He's like, you're a good man. You're a good man. I'm like, I'm not a good man. Just something simple. Forgiveness. It's gone for me. It's gone for my son. He learned the lesson of a lifetime. My dad couldn't have forgiveness. My dad, his father abused him. He took advantage of him. His family abused him. So he never forgave anybody. And he lived with anger his whole life. That's probably why I'm the opposite. So how does that relate to you? Why am I doing this? Training on forgiveness? Because if you have somebody in your life who took advantage of you, I'm sorry. Someone who cheated, stole from you, lied to you, ruined something, ruined a partnership, caused you to go bankrupt, caused you to lose a job. It sucks. But guess what? If you haven't forgiven them, it's only hurting you because there's only so much time, effort, and energy in a day. And if you're using that, even with a Fraction of, of what went wrong, why they did it. Whose fault is then? You don't have enough to compete in today's world. This is a competitive world. You need all your energy, all your juices, all your focus, all your enthusiasm focused on where you want to go. Not something somebody did to you. You can't undo it. So you might as well forgive. That's hard for a lot of you because some of you are thinking some pretty horrific things right now. Got to forgive them, too. Doesn't mean you have to forget. Doesn't mean you have to go be their best friend. But forgiveness will set you free. Forgiveness will take you to the next level of life, Abundance, joy and wealth. Listen. You listen to me not to get the magic money machine. I love teaching people how to make money with real estate in other ways. But if you don't go upstream and fix this shit, it's unsustainable, if that's even a word. So that's my message for today. Forgive. Appreciate you guys share this message. Get it out to the world. If you think it can help. You know the movie Fielded Dreams with Kevin Costner? It might be before your time. Maybe you never saw it, but it was a whole concept of if you build it, they will come. It was about. His father was a professional baseball player, and he kept having these dreams, these visions, and heard this voice of, if you build it, they will come. And he. He built this awesome baseball field out in the middle of his farm in a corn patch. And. And then all the ghosts of baseball past came and played. Amazing movie. Great, inspirational. But that's unfortunately how most people feel about their businesses. They feel if you build something good enough, if you build the right or you find the right widget, you create something. People need that if it's so good, or if you write a book and it's so good, or you create a course and it's so good, or if you become a real estate investor and you're so good, if you build it, they will come. And guess what? They will not come. That's the biggest misconception people have about business. What happens is there's some outliers. There's a book every couple of years that just gets written and virally goes nuts. There's a video that gets made and it goes viral and everybody sees it. There's a product that's created and you see it and you don't hear anything behind the scenes. You just think they built it and people came. And that's not true. You see, if you don't focus your energy in your business, in your new side income, in the thing that you have passion for. If you don't focus on marketing and sales, most likely you'll fail. I don't know how else to put it. I'm just going to put it the way it is. People who don't obsess on marketing and sales fail. It doesn't matter how good your product is, it doesn't matter how ethical you are. It doesn't matter how hard you work. There's people that work just. I put a lot of hours in because I love what I do. I work, I don't mess around. I'm not someone, I'd love to say that I built my business and I'm like Tim Ferriss, who's a dear, is a good friend of mine and I have the four hour work week and I work a couple hours a week and make lots of money now. I feel blessed about the money I make. I feel extremely blessed with the money I make. But I work my guts out for it. Fortunately, I like what I do. So that's the thing, is I work hard. But here's the thing, there's a lot of people that work just as hard of me, hard as me. It's in fee. I'm in Phoenix right now. It's 72 today, but yesterday was 100 tomorrow. Next week's gonna be 102. I'm gonna drive by construction workers. I'm going to drive by people putting down blacktop. I'm going to drive by people that are putting roofs on houses and 102, 105, 107. Those people work as hard as me, if not harder. They're physically working, taxing their body. But it's the same way in business. There's people who own businesses, man, that just are running on a treadmill because all their focus is going towards the product, the service. Now here's what I'll tell you the winning combination is. Then I want to give you a tip on selling. The winning combination is when you have a superior product, you supply a superior service, you care for your clients or your prospects in a way no one else does, while simultaneously you become an amazing marketer and sales processes. You see, here's what I know. I wanted to help change people's lives through showing them how I made money in cars and real estate. My first course to teach other people was called Motor Millions because that's what I did. I hustled cars in my teens, my early 20s. I'd match buyers and sellers. I'd fix wreck cars. And I made a living. In fact, I got into real estate while I was doing cars. The cars what paid my bills. And I started with no money. So I wanted to show people how to make money with cars. I created a course called Motorcycle Millions. Now that was amazing. And I just thought, hey, I'm gonna build this great course. Being naive. I'm gonna build this great course, show people I did it, and people are just gonna buy it. That wasn't the case. I had to learn how to market. And that was tough because it went against everything. In fact, I used to think maybe marketing and sales was a little like a little shady. Absolutely not. Everything you do, you're being marketed to. Everything you do been sold to. Sales and marketing are the oxygen of every successful company. Remember that? Sales and marketing are the oxygen for every successful company. And think about it. Can you go without oxygen? Heck no. Can a business go without marketing? Sales? Heck no. So then I build my first real estate course to teach people how I made money with real estate. Was called Think a little Different. Same thing. Think a little different did pretty good. It was a great course, showed people how to make money in real estate. It's a great course, but it wasn't a monster hit. And then I started realizing that what I was sharing with people, the benefits of my course, the benefits of my experience, the benefits of people not have to learn through their own trial and error, they can learn from my trial and error. All of that was there, but I was still doing okay. Several million dollars in sales. Profits were tiny. And then I realized what I was missing is I needed to obsess on marketing and sales. I need not to become a good marketer, not good with sales. I had to become amazing at it. I studied it. I obsessed on it. I joined Joe Polish's 25k group over 13 years ago, pay him 25 grand a year to be around marketers. I attend marketing masterminds. I obsess in watching other people's marketing. And here's the magic combination. When you have the best product, when you have the service that you care about people, when you build reciprocity with your clients, when you give them value. And then simultaneously, you get badass at marketing better than anyone on the planet. I've been on video thousands and thousands of times on purpose because I wanted to get better at being good on camera. Because here's what I know. Couple of things, and you should write this down. If you want to start or scale a business that you have or start a side income. First off, step one, love what you provide people so much that you feel like it's a disservice not to get them to say, say yes. Did you hear what I said? Love your product so much and make it so perfect that you feel you're doing people a disservice if they don't say yes. If I don't get you to buy my book, Millionaire Success Habits, I'm doing you a disservice. If I don't get you to listen to my podcast on a weekly basis, if I don't get you to watch my weekly wisdoms, I'm doing you a disservice. So I will do everything in my power to get you to say yes. So that's step one. Love what you do. Once you love what you do and you know you positively affect people's lives. If you're selling drugs and don't use this, this is unfair. If you're selling cigarettes or teaching people how to get hooked on gambling, then you have to look in the mirror and deal with that. But if you're providing a service, you're providing real estate, stock, whatever it is that you do, if you're doing it, you. You gotta love it so much that you want to get people in it no matter what. Then secondly, get make. If the product's so good, then learn how to get people and learn how to persuade. Get them to take action. Because there's a lot of crappy people out there with terrible products and they're good at sales. They don't last, but they still kind of screw people over. So my suggestion to you is, make the product so good you feel bad if you don't get in their hands and then learn how to market and sell. Here's two tips. People will buy from you and learn from you when they feel understood, not when they understand you. Did you hear that? That's one of the biggest secrets to my success. People will buy from you, do business from you, with you, learn from you when they feel understood, not when they understand you. Most people want to just vomit up all their experience, vomit up on how good they are, vomit up on how great their product is, and you don't even know what the person on the other side is thinking. Think about that with salesman. Would you do you like a pushy salesman? When you go to buy a car that comes out and says, I've been doing this for 30 years. I got this. I got this experience, this little baby be perfect for you, It's Fast, it's quick, it's, it's a two seater, it's this, this, this. And he doesn't realize you showed up because you want an suv, because you have four kids. Like, wouldn't have been better if you just walked out and said, hey man, out looking for a car. What's up with your family? What do you got going on? And just listen. People buy from you when they feel understood, when there's a connection. So love what you do so much, then let people feel understood. Then lastly, there's a lot of things, but these are three today in this short podcast. The last one is Enter conversations already going on in the mind of your prospects. Don't try to create. We want to create in so many ways the things that people need. Like, I know people need this. Let me ask you something. How many people need to go to the gym? How many people need to stop eating sugar? How many people need to read more, how many people need to sleep more or need to, you know, be a part of, go to church, whatever it is, but they're not going to go until they want to. You don't go to the gym unless you want to. You don't start changing your diet unless you want to. You don't fix your relationship unless you want to. So instead of trying to make up a conversation and force feed somebody into it, enter a conversation already going on in the mind of your prospect. Find out their fears, find out their goals, find out their desires, find out their worries and then address those. Solve those problems, let them feel understood. And you get the sale without selling. Selling is not evil. Marketing is not evil. Marketing and sales are the oxygen for any successful company. Love what you do and then be a badass marketer so you can get what you do, people's hands. So a plan B, that's nothing more than having a backup plan, right? If it doesn't work out, I always have this, and I would bet to say that is really good in some safety mechanisms for maybe some of your retirement accounts or, you know, some places where you need to feel safe, insurance. But I want to tell you how a plan B could literally be your downfall. A plan B could be the reason why things haven't gone in the direction you want, why the new company has started the next level of income hasn't started the bonuses, the raises, the finally getting your company going or even in your personal life fixing your relationship or whatever Plan Bs might be screwing you up. And let me tell you why. You see, to go on to your Next level of life. Let me back up even a little more. Most of the time in our life, and I hate to say this, and maybe you've heard this before, maybe you know it to be true. And if it's the first time you're here, I'm sorry to be the one to share it with you. Most of the time, our next level of life lives on the other side of our biggest obstacle. The thing we worry about, the thing we stress about, usually, is the little wall that once we get past it, through it, break a hole, and on the other side is our next level. So with that in mind, think about that. Think of your next level of life. Your income, your business, your success. Right? You're on the Millionaire Success Habits podcast. That means you want another level of income. Life, wealth, abundance, joy. Right? That's why you're here. You could be doing a million other things. You're with me, and I don't take it lightly. That's why I want to deliver value. But if you're here, that means what you want. You want that next level. Well, if it lives on the other side of the wall that's in front of you, the obstacle that's in front of you. If you have a plan B, in some cases, that means you didn't burn the boats. You want to take the island, burn the boats. So there's no other choice but for take. But for taking the island. If you want to accomplish that, a conqueror or accomplish that next level of life, goal, abundance, start that business. Take your current business to the next level. Finally, stop listening to all the naysayers. Tell your parents, they're crazy. Your friends, they're crazy. All this, the BS that we have in life. If you want to do it, a plan B will screw you up because you go, well, if it doesn't work, I can go back. When you get to the wall and you start trying to climb it, I'm saying this wall is the obstacle between you and your next level of life. Obviously, it's a metaphor, but if you get to the wall and you get a little scratch on your hand, you can go. I can go to plan B. The boats are still in the harbor. Maybe they've taken this island a little too much. No, what I want to shock you into thinking about today is if you've been dabbling for so long, if you've been desiring a next level, any area in your life, yeah, this is the Millionaire Success Habits podcast. But any area of your life that you're not having the breakthroughs you're not having the success you want. The next level you want. That means most likely you have a comfortable plan B. That's good enough. But let me ask you something. If life was good for the rest of your life, would you accept it? Even if, I mean, okay is one thing, right? I mean, you wouldn't want to go through a life with everything being okay. Yeah. How's your income? It's okay. How's your job? It's okay. How's your relationship? It's okay. You don't want that. But do you even want. How's your relationship? Good. How's your income? Good. How do you, like, you know, how do you feel when you wake up in the morning and the money you make? It's good. To hell with good. You're not watching me because you want good. You could do good on your own. You want excellent. You want. You want outstanding. You want something that makes you vibrate, that pops you out of bed in the morning. You have to flow, force yourself to get up. You can't wait to get up. Right. So if you want that, then we got to do the habits of millionaires. I say millionaires, just successful people, people who accomplish more. And one of them is the hell with plan B. Yes. In certain circumstances, I don't want to say if it's medical. You want to go get as many opinions as you can. I'm not dabbling there. What I'm talking about is when you want to accomplish something big, something out of your comfort zone, that next level that you've been craving, then screw plan B. Make everything all of your energy. Plan A, Burn the boats, knock the wall down, go through the pain, go through whatever it takes and put all the focuses like, no, there's no plan B. This is my life. You see, I've watched people for years desire another level of life. And I'll get people come. I'm not crazy like you or I'm not brave like you. Man, I get scared to death about every next level of my life. If I ever portray that I got all this figured out, that I never worry, that I don't have any stress, that I'm not afraid things could go sideways, that I'm not afraid, that my high level investments could take all my money away, that maybe someday they'd figure out I'm not that smart. Like I have all those fears. Maybe you don't. If you don't, good for you. But I do. And to think they don't go away is one thing. So when people come up to me and go, you're braver. No, I just decided that I want more and I'm raising my standards. I'm not going to settle for the life that my parents had. I'm not going to settle. Even if your parents had a great job, but they were miserable or they were stuck in a routine that you wouldn't like, it's still not good for you. So what we have to do, what we do, share on these podcasts or other people you can learn from that have accomplished this. I just want to share with you the stuff that gets you there. Right? We all want the vehicle, the way to make money. And I share that and I talk about that too. But if you come to an obstacle and you go, wow, that's a pretty tall wall, well, I'm going to try to climb it, but if not, then I'll just go sit over there and I'll spend the rest of my life being okay over there. If you do that, then you have an exit plan. You give yourself an excuse. It's like saying, I'm going to go to the gym, I'm going to try to lose weight, but if not, I can live with being overweight. It's okay. No, screw that. You want to get in good shape, make no other options except for being in shape. You want to start the business, do it. I'm not saying go quit your job tomorrow. I mean, listen, I want to be as open and transparent and even more personal on these podcasts than any other place is. When I wanted to go in the real estate business, let me start. I was cutting firewood in high school. That made me money. And then I started working on cars. I started a car business that I started fixing wrecked cars, had a collision shop that started doing great and making me enough money to live okay. While I was making money with my car shop, then at nights I worked on real estate. Then when the real estate made me more money in the cars, I quit the car business and I was full boat, full blown into the, into the real estate world. Then I was in the real estate world. I said, I want to teach other people how I do this. And I started writing books and doing courses and doing infomercials on real estate. And I never quit real estate, but I quit it as my full time job when my education and training went to a whole nother level. And then when I was selling books, I decided I wanted to go in the live event business. But the book business fueled the live event business and boom, another level. Now you see how that was. I didn't quit the one thing, but I didn't. I knew I wasn't staying there. I said, this is just going to pay the bills until this new company explodes, until it takes. Until it replaces that income. Then I'm burning that boat. No plan B. I wasn't saying I'm going to try real estate. If it doesn't work, I'll go back to cars. No, I knew in my head, mentally, the car business for me was done. That bridge was burnt. It wasn't a plan B. I was actually fading it out. So that's my personal story. What's yours? Where have you wanted to go? To another level. But your plan B might be holding you back. Because it's okay and it's good. You wouldn't be watching me if okay and good was good enough for you. It's time to burn the boats. It's time to decide where you want to go. It's time to mentally make the decision. You are getting over that wall no matter what it takes. If you got to dig under it, go around it, climb over it, get dynamite and blow it up, your next level lives on the other side of that. Listen, I do these podcasts week after week for you, for free, to empower you with capabilities to go to the next level, to set the foundation for success. And we're growing so fast right now we're number 22 in the world in the entrepreneur category. And I want more people to gain this knowledge for free. So if you love what we deliver, then share it with a friend. Comment, take a screenshot, post it on Instagram, tag me. Let's get this message out to those that need it, especially in today's shifting times. If you liked this podcast, make sure you rate it and also make sure to click subscribe so you never miss out. Remember, all success.
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