The Biggest Myth About Goals

The biggest myth, I believe, is writing it down and thinking it will become a reality. Has it ever worked for you before? Welcome to the Dean Graziosi Show. All success starts right here. Let's talk goals and goal setting. Does it work? Is it important? Should you do it? The fact of the matter is, goal setting might be one of the most important things you could do to make 2021 the best year of your life, or any year. But. But why don't they work? Why do people set New Year's resolutions? Heck, people could go back to their 20, 20, 19, 18, 17 resolutions, and sometimes they're the same. Why didn't you achieve them? So today I want to bust some myths. I want to turn goal setting upside down, maybe even show you a new way to approach it so it makes sense. And you set goals that become your reality. So we had some great questions come in. Number one was, what do you wish all professionals knew about goal setting? And in this day and age, I would say the importance of it and to not dabble. Most people in today's crazy busy world are overwhelmed. They don't have the time, they have anxiety, they're stressed, they don't have clarity. And what it boils down to, it's not about. They need a time management tool. They need a clarity tool. And what does clarity mean? Clear and concise goals, fuzzy targets don't get hit. Most people are running around avoiding what they don't want. They don't want to be broke, they don't want the career they're in. They don't want their business to be so hard. They don't want to be out of shape. They don't want their relationship to lose its intimacy. And they focus on that and they get more of it, as simple as that sounds. Those that thrive from the Harvard studies all the way back to Benjamin Franklin, who made goal setting popular. Those that have clear, concise goals, a target that they can hit, and it's a compelling future that they obsess on on a regular basis are the ones that achieve next level success, abundance, joy, happiness, and whatever it is you want out of life. So goal setting is massively important. You have to, you must, if you want more out of life. If you're happy with where you are, then you won't even be listening or reading this. So goal setting is important. You must have your lighthouse to steer your ship towards. So figure out where you'd love to be, write it down and stare at it. Number two, when. What are some goal setting myths? It's about time we let go of. And why. Okay, this one might get a little. Some people go, you're crazy. Now this guy Dean is crazy. A vision board. I think a vision board is great. I think setting goals is great. But we gotta let go of the fact of thinking that if I take some beautiful pictures of where the house I want to live in and the relationship I want and the body I want, and we put it on a vision board and we get all excited and we lay it out, we make this collage and we write down our goals. Goals. January 1st, when it's kind of that slow day and we look at them again. January 3rd. And then the board goes in the corner. And then by February 5, the board is on the floor. And by March, that board either gets thrown away or put in the closet. Thinking that's going to do anything for your life. That's like sitting and meditating and just visioning what you want out of life. It is so important to envision and to have your mind's eye see where you want to go. But then you have to take massive action. You must say no to the things that are eating up your time, that don't serve you God. Your bigger future. More money, more happiness, more joy. The biggest myth, I believe, is writing it down and thinking it will become a reality. Has it ever worked for you before? Has it worked for anyone? You know, we need to put goals together and then take the action to make our lives go in that direction, to achieve it. All right, number three. What's the most overrated goal setting advice, in your opinion, and why? I think the most overrated advice is just having somebody go through the process and say, how much money would you like to make? Write it down. How much love would you want? Happiness, intimacy in your life? Write it down. How your connection with God. Write it down. Your health, your weight, all those pieces. It's too simple for today's complex world. We need to attach emotions to that. And here's one thing I think could shift everything for you, is when you set a goal. Don't just set a goal on where you want to go. Now. We already talked about that. It's important. You need a compelling future, but you want to add some juice to that that makes it stick. I'd write down what happens if you don't go after it. If you don't finally start your own business. What's that going to feel like? What's that going to look like? Is the paycheck going to be the same? Or that your career could go poof in a moment, right? We always set I want the money, the happiness, the joy. What about the goal of having an intimate relationship? What's the opposite of that goal? If you stay feeling lonely, if you stay feeling separated, even in a home with your spouse? Right. What is the opposite of not achieving your ideal weight and health? Is it overweight, unhealthy and unhappy? I think we need to have parallels because some of us are driven by the kit or the carrot and some of us are driven by the stick. You need both sides because some of you would go after the carrot. Some of you want to move away from the pain of staying where you are. Recognize that and go deep on it and watch your goals become a reality. So number four is what are some goal setting tips that used to work, but they're not the most suitable for people who want to be successful now in today's world? That's a really good question. And here's what I believe is we are absolutely insane. I'm looking around for my phone. We are busier than we've ever been in our entire lives. Now this is going to date me and age me, but when I was a kid, there was a cartoon called the Roadrunner. And in the Roadrunner there was the Tasmanian Devil. And he spun so fast, right? That was. It was like, had this like turbine noise. He spun so fast he'd have a dust cloud around him and he couldn't see anything. That's what I believe our lives are like today. We have so much going on, we have a dust cloud around us and we can't see our future. We're just trying to get through a day. We're trying to just make it till our head hits the pillow and we can go to bed. And if that's the case, if we can't see where we want to go, it's hard to tell where our compelling futures and see our bigger future. So here's what I believe we must do. Instead of looking forward to where you want to go, let's come out of that dust cloud. Let's pretend it's one year from now and look backwards and say, if this was the best year of my life, what would that look like? That is the start to writing down goals that will become your reality because you're not in the dust cloud anymore. You're not looking forward through all the crap that's going on. You're fast forwarding a year and looking backwards and say, what had to happen? What would my weight be? What would my income be? What would I do for a living? How would my relationship be? How would my husband or my wife look at me? How would my kids look at me when we sit at the dinner table? And that conversation, how would I be connected to God on a whole other level? Whatever it is for you, just envision it's a year from now looking back and then write down like crazy, because that's where your real goals will come from. And the last question, number five. Are there underrated goal setting tips we should be embracing instead? And that answer is absolutely yes. You see, here's what I believe. When you set a goal for a new year, you should analyze the year prior and you should look at all the things that went wrong, all the things that sucked and hurt and you failed or were scared and got uncertain about. And now you're like, oh, that doesn't make sense. Yes, you must. Because in those tragedies, in those failures, are some of the gifts that will give you the power to solve and achieve your goals in this next year. So the thing that went wrong, there's always gold in it. So here's what I say. Analyze, feel the pain of what went wrong and dig through the crap until you find the gold. Take that gold with you, what you learned from that mistake, that thing that went wrong, and carry that into your new year and your new goals and let the rest of that failure, that being upset, the person that let you down, let it burn in the year prior. You don't need to carry it with you. It's like dragging a piano, cut the cord. Also, we need to look at what was a win, what worked in the previous year, what started giving you some momentum, what made you feel more courageous, more confident, more happy, what started the business growing. We need to analyze that and we need to take what worked and carry that into the new year, right? To set our new goals. So if you think before you set the goals, if you think through what went wrong and you learn from it, you think went right and you do more of it, they become the gasoline under the goals that you set for this new year. And then the last thing I would say is attach an emotion to those goals. If you achieve the goals you want, how will you feel? Will you feel more confident? Will you feel more alive? Will you feel more secure taking care of your family? Will you feel more free? Will you be happier? Because we never do things just for the money or being skinny. We do for the emotions attached. If you had more money, my family is safe. If I'm in better shape. I could breathe better, feel more alive, look better, and feel more confident and courageous. If I have my relationship get back to what it used to be, and I walk in a room and my wife, my husband, my other half looks at me with love in her eyes, I'll feel like that person I used to feel and feel invincible. Attach those emotions to your goals and watch them become a reality. Remember, vision boards and New Year's resolutions are all great, but if you don't look at that, if it doesn't sink into your heart, if you don't set a foundation, if you don't stare at it every day, it'll just be another year of wasted resolutions. If you like today's podcast, then you're going to love being a part of my texting community. What's that mean? You could text me right now at 480-400-9019 or it should be below right here. And it comes directly to my phone. Doesn't go to my team, it comes to me. I've been absolutely loving the interaction. I send out some cool things about once a week. I text nothing but things to get your week going, to get your mind thinking. And when we have new videos and things like that, I always text my community first. It has absolutely been a blast and I'd love for you to do it right now. Text me 480-40-0990 19 do it. Text me.