Why Your Brain Sets You Up To Fail (And How To Overcome It)

Most of everything we worry about doesn't come true, but it's a crutch that'll keep us stuck if we let it dominate our mind. Welcome to the Dean Graziosi Show. All success starts right here. Welcome to the Dean Graziosi Show. Whether you're watching or listening right now, I appreciate you being here. This is the podcast or the video that I try to, in 15 minutes or less, give you some practical knowledge, wisdom of life experiences, things that have allowed me to go faster, to go upstream and anchor in the little things that become the big things. Sometimes I do these while I'm walking and the audio is not perfect. Sometimes I'm here in my studio and it'll sound a lot better. But the end result is I hope I deliver you a message that can make an impact. Today we are in crazy times. The outside world is out of control, the outside world is uncertain. So this is a time we must master the inner game. We must master inner control. And the little things are the big things. And if you're looking to make more money, make more impact, have more success in your life, be abundant during a down market when inflation is at an all time high or 31 year high, where winter or recession seems to be inevitable. I'm not an economist, but it seems to be. Sometimes we're looking for the magical money machine, when really we must anchor in the foundation for success, the success habits. And today I got a story I want to tell you that I shared with my daughter this morning on the way to school that I think is a lesson for all of us. So in life, stuff will always go sideways. People will let you down, take advantage of you. The money won't come through. People that you thought had your back really are the ones talking about you or wishing you bad thoughts. All those things happen. No matter what, those things happen. So for my daughter, she had a birthday party. She turned 15. Unbelievable. I can't believe my little girl is 15 years old and she had a bunch of great friends over and the girls had the time of their life. But the next day she went to school, or two days later she went to school and one of the girls had a misunderstanding, thought that my daughter and other girls were talking about her. So fast forward a day, that's a big deal at 15 years old. So I said to my daughter on the way to school, I said, babe, what's bugging you? Nothing. You know, she's 15, she's kind of strong, independent. I said, I can feel it, I can see it. No smiles on your face. What's wrong, hon? Finally she tells me, and she tells me the whole story. And she is so nervous, going to school. And she wants to talk to the girl and let her know she would never talk about her. She thinks she's amazing and all these things, but she was so worried. And no smile, no happiness, no joy. Now that was a Saturday, it was a Sunday. This was Monday, the first day at school. So why am I telling you this story about my daughter? You're probably thinking, hey, I got my own stuff going on. But let me tell you the lesson. I told her, but as soon as I was done, I knew it was for me. It's for you. It's for all of us. So we're driving, I'm thinking, what do you tell a 15 year old? I'm always giving her lessons. And I didn't want her to be like, oh, dad, not another lesson. I wanted it to hit hard. So I said, you know, babe, I totally get it. And you're 15, it's going to be. You're going to feel it, you're going to have emotions and you can't get this right. I probably didn't get it right. I probably still don't have it right, but I didn't get it right until I was in my 40s. I hope that I could help you get there a lot quicker. So I said, let's just talk about this weekend. Now it's Monday. You're going to school, you're waking up, and the only thing on your mind is what went wrong, what your friends could say. People might have heard that you did something that you didn't do. There's nothing worse than being accused of something that didn't happen. Especially when you're a teenage girl in a new high school and all these things. And she goes, yeah, it's kind of what I'm thinking. I said, you see how your brain hijacks you? She's like, what do you mean? I'm like, man, your brain can just mess with you. And she's like, dad, I don't understand. I said, okay, this weekend, it was your birthday weekend. Her birthday happens to be on my birthday. Pretty amazing. So on her birthday morning, I woke up super early and I went to the store and I got all her favorite pastries and all her favorite things to drink. So when she woke up, she had this spread of muffins and donuts and bagels and she loves this orange drink with mango and all laid out for her. She's like, oh, dad, thanks. And then we went to the store and we did cool stuff and then got her some clothes that she wanted. And then at 4 o', clock, her friend that she hadn't seen since last year, who went away for high school has been gone for six months. Her best friend in the world since second grade showed up and she was like, oh my God. And they were hugging each other in tears. And then all of her nine friends came over and they had dinner and amazing time and laughs and they did amazing things. They stayed up, they laughed so hard till one o' clock in the morning. Most of them lost their voice because they had so much fun. We woke up the next day on Sunday and my littlest boy, Luca, was baptized. And she came to the baptism and got to witness that. And, and then she had this friendsgiving with a whole bunch of friends and all these amazing things happened. But Monday, what is her brain focusing on? What does all of our brains focus on? In so many instances, her brain was focusing on the one thing that went wrong, that could have gone wrong. Her brain. And that's why I said to her, you didn't wake up saying, oh my God, my birthday was amazing. I celebrated with my dad, all my friends were over, dinner was great. I saw my best friend in the whole world, I haven't seen in six months. I witnessed my little brother getting baptized. I. I had friends giving yay, Happy Monday. She woke up and her brain said, oh my God, the girls think you were talking about you. They're going to look at you funny and life is over. How many times do we do that when we want to start the business, start the next level of life, start the relationship, fix the relationship, have a bonding, be bonded with our friends. Our brain goes, they're talking about you. She doesn't love you anymore, he's not that into you. The business is going to fail. This economy, winter is coming, inflation, the president, the last president, the future president. Our brains want to hijack our thoughts and drive us down a road of what went wrong, what we don't have, or what we lost. And here's the thing I want to share with you in this quick message. Life can never be abundant. You will never create the level of happiness, joy, success, income, focusing on what went wrong, focusing on the one thing wrong when, rather than what you have to work with or what went right. So as I told my daughter this story as she left now, it's not like she was like, oh, wow, I feel amazing. But I watched her come home from school and she was like in a good mood. And she was like, dad, thanks for before. That's the most I'll ever get right? But that's okay. I know she got it. And then the second lesson part of that, they were fine. By 10 o' clock in the morning, everything was settled. Once they talked, I said, here's something to remember, too. Most of everything we worry about doesn't come true. But it's a crutch that'll keep us stuck if we let it dominate our mind. So that was my message for my daughter in ninth grade, 15 years old. But isn't it a message we all need? Don't we all need to focus on what we do, have to work with, what we've been blessed with, the experiences went through, even if the things were wrong in our lives, it built the grit, it built the experience, it built the knowledge and the wisdom. In the words of Tony Robbins, what if life happened for us, not to us? And we use that back, all that data as the wind behind our sails, and realize that we're here to fight another day. These are crazy times. But in crazy times, that's when real wealth, real abundance, real success, real growth is formed. So we can decide to sit back and hope someone else is coming to save us. That ain't never happening. Or we could say, this is my time. I'm going all in. I'll take my past, I'll use it as my fuel. I'll check out what I do have and use it as an asset rather than focusing on what I don't. And let's take life to another level. When I'm recording this, we're heading into Christmas and holidays and New year's. Let's make 2022 the best year ever. I'm Dean Graziosi. Thanks for being here. If you love this, share it, tell a friend, take a screenshot, put it on social media. I do these for free because I want to give you the tools I wish someone would have given me sooner in my life. So share it with a friend, post, leave a comment, like it, tag it, do whatever it takes. Let's get this message out. As always, our podcast is free. We don't even sell advertising space. So how you could pay us back is by helping other people get this information in their hands. So if you enjoyed today's podcast, go ahead and take a second and rate and review the show and tell a friend. Heck, take a snapshot and put it on your Instagram. It's the best way for you to help other action takers get the knowledge they need to live into their full potential. And if you haven't already, go ahead and subscribe now to get access to new episodes three times a week. And as always, you can go to the description for this podcast and check out the special links I shared with you to take your success, free freedom and abundance to a whole nother level.