Saving Lives with The WHY.os (WHY+HOW+WHAT) Discovery

Welcome to why to Y for the month of November. And today we are talking to two very interesting and amazing people that work in the financial services industry and who also have some great backgrounds. We ran into them because Nick Davis is a Y certified professional who is using the Y Discovery in his practice as a financial planner and in his work with 22. 0. So let's get started. I am the Chief Growth Officer at Y Institute, Dan Dominguez. My why is to contribute. My how is to challenge the status quo and my what is to make sense now. So that makes a little more sense. For those of you that are tuning in for the first time, I'm going to give you a quick review of the nine whys that we help people discover using the why Discovery. The first is to contribute to a greater cause, to make a difference, add value, or have an impact. We call that contribute. The second is trust, to create relationships based on trust. The third is make sense to make sense out of things, especially if they're complex or complicated. The fourth is better way to find a better way and share it with others. The fifth is right way to do things the right way in order to get reliable results. The sixth is challenge to think different, differently and challenge the status quo. The seventh is mastery, to seek mastery and understanding. Number eight is clarify to make things crystal clear and understandable. And number nine to simplify to decrease complexity. Make things simple. So while we're on that subject, if you have not discovered your why, go to www.whyinstitute.com and take the Y discovery. Use the code Y2Y W H Y T O W H Y and you'll get 50% off the why Discovery. This program will make a lot more sense when you know your why. So with that, let me introduce our guests. First, I'm going to introduce Nick Davis. Nick Davis is a board member of an organization called 22. 0, and we're going to let him tell us a little bit more about that. Nick and Sarah met early in 2011 thanks to eHarmony, and they were married on New Year's Eve of that same year. They have three children together, Fisher, Anika, and Bodie. And Nick also has two older daughters, Haley and Emma. So they live in southern New Hampshire in the woods. They spend a lot of time on the water at Lake Champlin in Vermont. They hunt in the fall and they snowboard in the winter. They have four dogs like I do and love to be in the outdoors. They have a deep faith in God and do their best to raise their tribe with great values, always trying to keep things headed true north. Nick's why is contribute makes sense. And his how is make sense and his what is trust. Welcome Nick.

Thanks Dan. Appreciate you having us on here.

Thank you for being on. I can't wait to talk to both of you. Sarah Davis is someone who has always been interested in helping others. That was her passion when she was a physical therapist when she graduated college and she spent 13 years leaning into that career. So the trust relationship and long term partnership with her clients is what truly lights Sara up today. Her why is right way, her how is mastery and her what is trust. So today we are going to talk about how this impacted both Nick and Sarah's relationship. How it impacts their career as financial advisors that professional financial advisors and and then the work that Nick does to help veterans and first responders through his work at 22. 0. So let's start with a simple question and we'll go, we'll go. Nick, Sarah, Sarah, Nick and you guys just keep me in line. So tell me how discovering your Y operating system, Nick individually has changed your life.

Well, when I first was able to tap into this powerful system here of the why, why how what I had people ask me how I would have success, why I was having success in, to be honest, I was kind of ignorant. I didn't know I'd just say I like people, I love to help people. So that was the contribute side of me coming out. But what I didn't realize, oftentimes I was using my story. I was connecting with people because I wanted to help them, I wanted to contribute in some way to their life. And until I went through this, I didn't know I would always say, does that make sense? Does that make sense? I probably sounded like a broken record. And trust has always been something that's big to me. So when I finally was able to wrap my head around it, when people start asking me questions or you know, why do you do what you do for a living? Or that that's actually a big one, why do you do what you do for a living? I was at a high level in the aviation industry and always felt like this isn't what I'm supposed to be doing. I told Sarah when I first met her, I need to work with people. I just want to help people. I need to work with people. I didn't know what that meant, but I did. So when I got to do the career change, now that I've gone through this and I know that I'm a contribute make sense Trust person. I look back at my old career and I know why I was so unfulfilled, unhappy and not lit up. The mechanical piece I'm good at. And I liked the idea of not like the idea, but when I was in the service, I was contributing, I was helping, serving my country, right? But once you transition to the civilian world and it's aviation, I'm not contributing, I'm not making sense of an aircraft for a principal on the back of the airplane. They just need to get where they need to go. And I'm not really building deep rooted relationships. Flip that into what Sarah and I do professionally now. Everything we do revolves around helping, contributing to our clients lives, right? Protecting what they have, helping them navigate the bad stuff, protecting and growing what they work so hard for and we get to make sense of. And even in Sarah with her masteries, you know, really dive into the nitty gritty so that we can build a trusting relationship. So when you look at what we do professionally, I wish we could take this and run every single 17 and 18 year old in the planet through it before they go to college. And their parents, because they probably have parents, that one of them is not happy in their career, not happy what they're doing. And when you're lit up by what you do, you don't feel like you're working anymore. So Dan, just like you right now, you're a contribute person, right? You get to challenge the status quo, what's going on and you get to build relationships or I think camera you trust at the end or you simplify.

So.

And right. And when you do this, people go, wow, that makes sense why I do what I do now, right? So every day you're lit up doing what you do. So for me, the job and our relationship and the nonprofit, it just ties so much into our world that it literally kind of ties it all together. I don't know how to explain it than that. Maybe Sarah can chime in with a couple of cents there. But that's how I feel about it. It's how it's helped me.

I love how, I mean this is what's really cool. When you know your yos and you're living it, you get excited just like you did Nick. I see that in people. Because now you know it and you live into it. And what you did before, what does it didn't match makes sense. And what matches so well now makes sense for you. So Sarah, tell us your story. Your. Your why is right way mastery, your how is mastery and your what Is also trust, like Nick. So I can see where you guys come together there. But tell me what it was like for you when you figured this out. I'm assuming Nick is who helped you get to go through the process.

Yeah, I hadn't figured mine out first. I was relieved. You know how you felt that, like, make this make sense why I'm lit up. For me, learning about the why organization and what you do, it was complete relief because Nick is the contribute person and I'm not at all. So for years, he's just always given of himself to everyone. He's a yes man. If somebody just needs anything, he's there doing it. And me, I spent some time at home with the kids. To be honest, there was years I was resentful, honestly and selfishly. Now looking back, because he just kept helping everybody else, but I'm like, what about us? What about us? So once he took the why assessment and I read through it, what a contribute person is, why he can't help himself, why he's lit up completely by it. It made complete sense, and I backed off a little bit. I might still give him a hard time once in a while, but it makes sense to me now why he does that. And so that's how I came to understand what this assessment was. And so when I took mine, of course, right way was my why. And I think Nick also found some humor and a little bit of relief in understanding why. I'm going to stop at every yellow light. I'm going to follow every rule. If there's a piece of tape across an area that says do not cross, you better believe I'm not crossing it. So it made us just help our relationship understand each other better.

I almost dumped her. We went to a concert and I crossed the thing that said, do not cross this line. It was out into a balcony. And I'm like, the singer's right there and there's a whole group of people. I'm like, let's go, guys. And we just crossed over, and we're all watching, and she's like, what are you doing? Like, full meltdown. I'm like, oh, boy. I'm dating the crazy one. I found another crazy one. Oh, my gosh. Now looking back, and she reeled it in quickly after we left. But she also didn't like crowds at the time. That's another conversation. But the right way side of her was, you can't do that. I'm like, what's the worst you're gonna say? Get back behind the line. Okay, Darn but it was like meltdown city.

Now I'm not the right way. That's like a panic attack, like breaking.

Absolutely. And. And it's funny you say that because me being with a how of challenge, I do that all the time. And my wife is. Is clarify.

Clarify and trust in her top three. So she is by the book. And so I do things like Nick did all the time. She's like, what are you doing? You can't do that. And I'm like, Nick, I'm like, what are you going to do?

Just.

They'll tell us, get back behind the ropes. I'll get behind the rope when they tell us. Right. So that is a great example. Thanks for sharing that story, Nick. And this was when you were dating, I'm assuming. I hope that you're not after you found out her yos.

No, but it does lead to why Sarah has a doctorate in physical therapy and she can study standing on her head. She loves that stuff. She could be a professional student. Me, I'm like, oh, my God, please don't make me study. I don't. Just let me implement. Do I want to go and help and don't want to read a book? Right. For her, it makes her feel good because she understands everything, which drives me nuts sometimes. But earlier, when the conversation was going back and forth, I would say that Sarah provides balance for me and vice versa, because I contribute. I do reel myself in, but there's times where I'm exhausted and she gives me that permission. Like, listen, you. I'm watching you. You're getting wore out. You're worried you need to reel it back in. And then sometimes where she's too worried about all the detail and making sure she has the mastery, I'm like, listen, how much better are your clients going to be for working with you, even if you don't know everything? Because you're never going to know everything in our world. Our world's complex. But how much better are they working with you than going to try to do it themselves? And I'll help her reframe some of that stuff. So we have a lot of respect for each other. I think that's the, you know, we've been done a lot of living. We've both been through divorces. And I think that we wanted to really focus on how do we make us really strong, Because Sarah and I are really strong. Our kids are going to be great. Our business is going to be great. Our clients are going to feel it. And even if you're not a clarify Person. You, the people that you're working with and the people that trust you, people that you're helping, they're attracted to you, if you have clarity. Right. So the clearer we are and who, why, what we are and how we operate makes it very easy for them to go, this is who I want to work with, or this is not the right fit for me, which is better for us because we don't spin our wheels and waste our time contributing to somebody that doesn't really care.

That's excellent. So that leads perfectly into my next question. And tell me what impact knowing each other's yos, and you've mentioned it a little bit, has had on your relationship, your personal relationship with each other.

Go ahead, Mama.

So, yeah, less resentment for me. More understanding, giving him more space, giving him more permission, taking more of the lead role at home so that he can have that freedom to run with it and go contribute all over the world.

How about for you, Nick?

I honestly think that Sarah, knowing her, why, I think that helps just as much as her knowing mine. She does all the things that she just said. She does give me the space, but she would have a lot of guilt. Look at who Nick's helping. I'm not helping any. All the contributing he's doing, I'm not doing that. I think that's where a lot of the resentment came from because, like, he's doing all this stuff. Yes. I'm stuck with the kids. I'm doing this while he's doing that, but I don't even want to do the stuff he's doing. So I'm double guilt all day long now that she understands it. She don't. It's. It's like keeping up with the Joneses. Right? She doesn't need to keep up with me. She's not me. And vice versa, you know, I can't be her. She's amazing in her own way. So I think that the more you know this as a couple, and even if we were just partners in business, because we work really well in business together, it really allows you to give space and as we say with our faith, you know, you have more grace when it comes to others. Right. If you have a challenged person, Dan, they can be a pain in the OSS.

Operating system. I was trying to play that on the yoss.

You know, challenge people are great, especially if you know it and you're putting them in the right space right now. If I. Sarah's a challenge person or, you know, Bettina, that works for us, let's say. She was. And I'm getting frustrated. Once I understand, oh, let her go and do her thing. And she's going to find better solutions, better options, better opportunities for us. And you have that grace to empower them to be who they are and live into that. And I think that it just comes full circle to you. The more you can give that grace, the more it comes back to you, reap and sow. And honestly, it has played out so much in our marriage, in our lives in the last probably two to three years in a very big way.

Thanks so much. It has been so great to meet you and Dan Jarvis and the work that you guys do. I would love for you to talk to our listeners and viewers about the work that you do. I see the poster in the background. 22. 0 healing the hero. Tell us about that mission. And this could be one of the things, Sarah, that you resented. I know that that is not easy work that Nick does. I know that that is a very noble mission. And when we talk about all the things that entails, I would love to hear more about that work that you, Dan Jarvis and the 22. 0 organization helping first responders and veterans overcome PTSD.

So Dan and I have become best friends. We're just very few people on the planet I trust more than him. I love the guy. He is. He says what he means and means what he says, and he shows you with his actions. And when I met him, he had severe pts. He had contemplated. He almost took his own life one night and he got healed from having PTS. And I helped him get 22.0off the ground because 501 C3. That's Sarah and I's world. But Dan and I really started diving in hand in hand when I realized how powerful what we're doing is. And to be honest with you, we've worked with hundreds and hundreds of civilians. So it's not just the people in uniform. That's our mission as a nonprofit. But I want anybody that hears this if you're struggling from a traumatic event, that if you were to think about it, on a scale of 0 to 10, 0 is no emotion. 10 is pretty intense. If you're like a 7 or higher, there's a good chance you have mild to some form of pts. I'm not trying to diagnose people, but feel free to give us a call and we'll help you or we'll connect you with someone. The look that we normally get. And this is usually kind of comical. I did a zoom earlier, and when you tell somebody I can cure pts.

Look around the room when I say that. And there's all these eyeballs, like, yeah, right.

It's too good to be true. It's unbelievable. That's crazy talk. We can get rid of anxiety. Anybody that has anxiety, and there's a lot of people with anxiety, they've been on medications for years. Bettina, that works for us is proof. She is on anxiety meds and she's giving me permission to share this. But for over 30 years, we cleared her anxiety, no more meds. So the processes that we run with folks that are, as I say, jammed up, trauma that you experience, a lot of veterans, first responders, nurses, doctors, people that serve, right, psychologists, psychologists and therapists, those career fields a lot of people get into because they have childhood trauma or childhood events that make them want to help build trust, serve or even figure out their own stuff. So what we see is trauma stacks on trauma. So by the time you get in the military or the time you become a nurse or a doctor or a psychologist, you've had other traumas in adulthood. So you think those are your bad ones. But a lot of times it starts at an early age, not always, but it does. So when somebody has a bad event, basically what we do is we bookend the bad event with a black and white image. And I'm going to give you the very brief version of this that we can maybe some other time do a different call. But you book in the event with a black and white image where the person was safe and okay before and after and you run through a process where they would like. For me right now, I would imagine that I'm sitting on that couch behind me and there's a TV up on my wall and I put the black and white images up on that TV and then we go, okay, go stand over in the corner so that you can see yourself on that couch. But you can't see the TV because the you on the couch is going to watch you on the tv, go through the events, starts with this black and white image before anything happens, you're safe. And ends with this one. When you run this process and there's a little more to it, the person does not have to talk about their trauma. They don't have to relive it. We don't want them to relive it. We don't want them to think about it. We want them to be disassociated from it. And it allows the brain to go, wait, wait, wait, this is black and white. It's old I was safe before, I was safe after. This doesn't belong in my amygdala. And when we finish the process, they'll go from a 10 to a 0. So one guy in our documentary that we just finished filming and it got released on 9 11, healing the heroes of 9 11, the way forward, we took five first responders that were at ground zero who had severe pts and we cleared them, we interviewed them, they talked a little bit about it, we cleared them off camera and two days later we're all at ground zero together. These are people that couldn't go back into the city, people that couldn't go to ground zero, hadn't, excuse me, hadn't been there in 20 years. Pts gone. So basically.

Everything that we do is to try to help those people sever that emotional connection to a traumatic event. Because some people that are civilians go, I cleared a guy who was a civilian at ground, it was blocks away watching everything happen from another building. He felt guilty because he's like, I wasn't a first responder. Why should I have pts? Well, it's post traumatic stress. And I don't care who you are, if you are on any building and watch those towers fall on 9 11, that is post traumatic stress. You don't have to wear a uniform to have that be a part of your life. So it is any traumatic event. And something that's traumatic at age 6 might not be at age 27 or 47 or 67. So we just help people walk through that process and we disconnect it and give them their lives back. And we've done it thousands and thousands of times. It works. And I guess the problem with me is I'm a contribute person when I know I have a superpower, which is not really me, it's just I'm coaching them through the process. But it's like, you're healed, move forward. And the guy at the end of our documentary, his name's Larry, he had tried to, literally had a gun and tried to kill himself five days before. I worked with him. He came, his friends stopped him. I worked with him. We cleared five traumas in one session. His guilt and his anger. And the next day they made a post on LinkedIn. He's got this huge smile on his face and it was a real smile. And what he posted brought me to tears. I had no idea.

I didn't saw that on your profile.

Yes, it was profound. So when you do that, like I'm not a doctor, if you cut your arm open right now and you're bleeding out. Like, dude, you're gonna die.

I'm sorry.

I'll call a doctor. Like, I'm not stitching you up. I might throw a tourniquet on there, but that's not my jam. But this, the mental health healing, I love it and I love to see people be free. My own wife has benefited from it. I've benefited from it. So it's something tangible, I guess. And the results are immediate, which I like. Like, boom, you're healed and you're feeling better. So next to my family and God, you know, that's in my clients. You know the passion that I have for 22. 0 and what Dan spoke into existence and we have been tied at the hip moving forward with it. It is really healing the people amongst us in our country that give the most back to all of us collectively. So love it. Thanks for asking and bringing it up.

Nick, if somebody wants to help or wants to learn more, is it 220. Org?

It's 220. Org. You'll get our website. If you send a message in, you're literally going to get Dan or me my cell number we can put up when the time's right. I'll absolutely give that out. And my email address is Nick Davis. N I C K D A v I s@20.org and people can be feel if I'm busy, me and Sarah on vacation with the kids. I'm not going to leave you hanging. I'll refer them to another coach. We're training people to do peer to peer coaching because if you are a Marine, you're going to feel more comfortable going to talk to a Marine. Right. And a lot of people in our space don't really want to go to a therapist or counselor because they've either been through it and the therapy they had to talk about it and that means they were just reliving the trauma. So they're cagey. So with us, if you're a physical therapist and I got Sarah, that's a peer coach and I can say, hey, I have a peer coach that's a physical therapist.

Perfect.

Oh, great. There's immediate trust there.

Right.

There's some kind of, you know, there's commonalities. So it really works very quickly.

Yep, excellent. Sarah. You know, as I was hearing Nick talk about that his contribute just came out so vividly. Right. And you mentioned when we talk about that relationship now that you understand that his he is driven to help others, that that is what lights him up. How has that changed your perception of him and your relationship.

Oh, I'm in awe every day of how much he can give. I say to him, like, I don't know how you do it, man. I couldn't do that. Just, you know, it's a lot of. I'm an introvert. I'm a little bit quieter, a little more reserved. So talking to people honestly does wear me out and exhaust me so he can talk to so many people in a day. And it's not chit chat, it's not just talking, it's literally him helping them with their finances or their emotional mental health all day long. And I think the world of Nick because he is just so lit up and it's, it's refreshing to see in this world, you know, these days for someone to just give back just selflessly because he can and it does help.

And we're fortunate, right? We've done this why discovery with hundreds of thousands of people and we have found that 22% of the population has the why of contribute. So we're in good hands. The earth seems to be in good hands because if you divide, you know, 100 by 9, it should be about 11% for each of the nine why's if they were divided equally. So we're in a good place. And thank, thank you Nick for all that you do to help veterans. Now let's talk about an interesting dynamic that you guys have. You were a physical therapist for a long time, Sarah, and then Nick had a situation where he needed some help in his office, at his financial services office. You stepped in for some weeks and then said, wait a minute, I think I can do what Nick is doing. Right, so now you have joined him in that venture. Tell us about how that came about and what role understanding each other. Or maybe you can look back because you didn't know your yos's at the time. Looking back, what role did your right way, mastery and trust play in that? What role did Nick's contribute make sense and trust play in that?

Yeah, sure. So twofold reasons why I went into his office and to be honest, one of them was to escape the kids. I had stayed home with the three kids for quite some time and it was amazing. I would do it all over again. But I got to a point where I missed, you know, being an adult and having those conversations and in a way contributing myself. So that was one part. But I really had had enough healthcare industry, you know, it really had just, it served its purpose. I loved it. But I was ready for something new. And at the same time Nick needed to fill a role of the office administrator, the branch office administrator collectively known as the BOA in our world. His person had left and so he really needed to take his time to hire the right person. Because if you get the wrong person in that seat, you can imagine the ship stopped sailing. So I said, well, just put me in temporarily till you find the right person. And I've been in there maybe just a few weeks or maybe a month or so when I watched this elderly woman come. She had just lost her husband, you know, not too long before, and the look of panic, distress in her face. I sat at the front desk. I didn't even listen to the conversation. But she met with Nick for maybe an hour. She came out smiling, relaxed, peaceful, and she went on her merry way. And I said, I have no idea what you just did for that woman, but I want to do what you just did. And didn't really know what I was getting myself into. But I said, I want to be a financial advisor, you know. So for me, that knowing now I didn't know then, you know, the right way, the mastery I knew the trust that's always been big for my core values. But I tackled the studying and the learning head on. That wasn't daunting for me because that's what lights me up. So honestly, that part I geeked out on and did pretty well through that. So it made that transition easy. Once I got to talk with clients, that's when I leaned on Nick because he had that contribute and simplify and make sense that my geeky brain needed to translate my language that was stuck in my head to now how do I put it into practice? So I've leaned on him very much so. And now we really work together, which is actually the best of both worlds with clients because, you know, he can really dive into more the investment piece and the part that lights him up. And I can geek out on the numbers and the budget and the financial plan. That really is my wheelhouse. And usually if we're talking to a couple or maybe even just one person, they can sit, see the benefit of both dynamics coming at them from us together. So we found it very helpful in this whole transition over the last few years.

I love a lot of the realization that you came to as a right way person. You're always looking for systems and processes that deliver reliable results. What more could you want in your financial advisor? Somebody that's going to find that and then your mastery. You're somebody who's going to just really dig deep and know your stuff. One of the challenges that we know people with mastery in their top three is they tend to know so much, they overwhelm the people they talk to. Right. And as Nick said earlier, you don't need to tell, you don't need to know everything. You just need to know what they. You don't have to tell them everything. You just need them to know what they need to know in order to make the right decision. So I'm sure that that has helped because makes sense. Kind of cuts through all the clutter. Right. And so he's probably helped you a lot with your messaging and you probably are a great resource for him when he needs more depth because he knows you've probably got the answer, that he doesn't want to go research, he doesn't.

Want to hear it, but he knows where I can pull it out.

She's, she's very, very good. Like how she said it bot she looks at me going, why you must be exhausted. All the people even talking to, when we sit down and look at our budget, our personal family budget, money, bills, I'm like, oh, if I have to do this for five more seconds, I'm going to go jump off a bridge. I'm overwhelmed. She's like, that's easy for me. I like it. So it really.

The differences, which some of them, we probably shouldn't really work together so well, but I think Sarah and I have done so much living in a short period of time. We're both in our early 40s, but we've gone through divorce. We've both owned multiple homes, real estate investments. You know, I've had it all and lost it all. I've been through bankruptcy when I went through my divorce. So I was like, we've been through a lot of stuff that not just what we learn read in a textbook or in the financial world, but we lean on our past experiences and we're always going, how do we grow as people and grow together and help each other? And I think she's reeled me in a lot of times because I am such a contribute, makes sense person. A lot of times when somebody's talking, I want to be like, oh, stop talking. Let me make sense of that for you. Because I feel like I can do it better.

Right.

It's tough being more self aware of way I speak things I do. I've become a very good listener. You would actually kind of laugh at this. When Sarah and I sit with clients a lot of times Sarah is much more reserved when she speaks. You Listen, right? I'm jealous of that because she just has that way about her. I might have command presence and move people to action but she has that way about her. Sometimes it's funny because we'll sit with clients and if she's a little nervous or whatever, I'm in total detective mode. I switch like my brain goes into another world and I'm listening, listen and listen, listening. And just as they're about ready to give me the details that I'm waiting for, Sarah will jump, Bettina might jump in and I'm like, what's wrong with you two right now? Where's my quiet ladies that are so articulate and smart and I like. They were just about to give us the information we needed and we've had so many conversations and the great, the thing that allows us as a couple to work together and thrive and have those conversations I think is the level of respect that we have for each other. And you have more respect when you learn how the person's wired. Knowing that Sarah needs the detail, she needs to understand it and she needs to do it the right way allows me to have more grace for her when she comes questioning me and she's all nerved up and I'm like oh my God, do I really? Well of course, number one, you're my wife and I love you but I understand why you need that information. And for me, when somebody comes to me with information, you start going into all these details, I'm like save it bullet points or I'm going to kick you out of my office because all that stuff just wears me down. And Sarah and Bettina, everybody in the office, we really work well as a team. We have five of us in the office total right now and it's like a well oiled machine which is odd for a small office, right? Because if you have one bad apple or one person that doesn't fit, it's not like an office full of 40 or 50 people where you can kind of hide and avoid the person, right? Come into work and you're with them every day.

So have you done the yos with everybody in the office? So you kind of all know each other. I love that. So you know Bettinas and then there's a fifth person. So you know everybody's why, how and what and you know where they're coming from. I love the phrase you use. It gives you grace for them, right? It allows you to give them grace and to allow them to be who they are and then accept the gift.

That they bring and it teaches you something. A lot of people are micromanagers, right?

Yeah.

Micromanaging will cause you to lose really good people. I'm anti micromanaged person. I think I believe in empowering people. But there's ways that some of us, depending on our why, if we are the person that leans more that direction, understanding that about yourself will keep you from taking action, saying things, or doing things that would otherwise bring your partner or whoever that's working with you either equally or above or below you. You know what I mean? So I think it really helps in that avenue.

You guys are answering questions before I get to them, which is great. But one question. When we were talking before, you talked about a young client's child that came in ready to go to college, and you saw where they were going, and you said you. But before you go anywhere, let's give you the why. Let's figure out your why, how, and what. So tell me how that went.

You know what? It's. The funny thing is, if the parents are with them, and I've had both situations, and I don't know about Sarah, I don't speak for her, but it's honestly a way for me to tell the parents that they need to check themselves before they wreck themselves without saying it. Because when they finally realize that the kid doesn't want to go to school to be an attorney, because they're like, if you line up what you do for a living, like me.

Right.

Okay. Can you contribute by making sense of something and build trust by working on an airplane? Probably not. Not in the level that you want to. So you need to do some kind of career field where you get to help the greater good and get to actually explain what you're doing. You know, a doctor could do that. You know, there's different career fields that can do that kind of thing. A counselor, a coach, a teacher. And ultimately you build trust with those people because you become that trusted figure super fast, accelerates, and it saves people a ton of money. I personally am not anti college or pro college. I'm pro. Figure out a little bit more about you and your why before you go make a bad decision. It's like saying, well, everybody buys a Chevy. You got to buy a Chevy. So you go out and buy a Chevy and you're like, I hate this car. Well, everybody else does it. People do that with college nowadays. You got to go to college. What are you gonna go for? I don't know. I'm just gonna start, and then we'll see where it leads. Us, how many people have a college degree that do something completely different?

Right? So.

Right.

So if you can figure that out or at least help the parents and the kids understand, this is where you got to go. As financial advisors, it can save tens, if not hundreds of thousands of dollars for everybody. And it can bring families together because all of a sudden, the family go, okay, my kid's not a defiant jerk. He's a challenged person. He just has to challenge his. That's why he doesn't do what his teacher says every time he's challenging it and finding a simpler way to do it, Period. Now, mom and dad understand Junior, and Junior's not getting throttled by mom and dad or grounded or car taken away. Let them be them. You know what I mean? So a lot of what Sarah and I do on a daily basis is a lot of human psychology, interaction, managing emotions, and the better you can understand somebody like those kids. You can bring the emotional temperature down in the room and the kids thrive and the parents thrive and they think we're geniuses, but we're just stealing what you gave us.

I love that. No, and here's my final question, and I want to hear this now. And you and I are going to have to have a conversation offline, both of you, because you haven't taken advantage of this as much as I think you could. Tell me how you think, how you believe knowing the yos of your clients can help you as you work with them on their financial planning, their estate planning, everything that you do as financial service professionals. How can knowing the yos of your clients help that Sarah, so much?

Because for me, the way I picture it is if I know that person is a contribute, for example, and mastery is nowhere to be found, I am not going to kill them with the data that they don't want versus the one that is more aligned like myself, we can have those conversations. So I think that their perception of our relationship is going to go straight, strong, grow stronger. If I'm speaking to how they want to learn information or how they want to experience, you know, their financial plan, I can cater it to more their desire rather than my perception of what it is I think they need.

Love that. Nick, do you have anything to add there?

You know, I would ask. I actually have a question for you, and you can follow this up. But I truly believe that certain people in certain career fields are wired with a couple of the whys more heavily. Engineers, for instance, are very difficult to work with in our career field. I think there's some of that is that there are probably a lot of mastery people in engineering and right way people. So when you. And obviously I'm not wired that way and I don't mind giving data, but sometimes they overthink the wheel and you're like, listen, you're not gonna. Just like you. They don't go to their attorney or their CPA and go, well, I read this book and I can figure out what you're doing. But for some reason in financial planning, they googled it or they've read a few things and they feel like they need to have some control here because maybe they're fear based about money. I don't know what it is, but certain career fields seem to have it more heavily than others. So to really be able to identify is that truly the way they're wired or did they experience something bad in childhood? Which come back to 22zero because we can clear. I've literally sat here with clients who had poverty consciousness, right? They would call me every week, the market's down, the market's down, the market's down. Or this stock went down. I asked one woman, when was the first time you ever remember experiencing the emotion, that emotion, the lack, the poverty mindset? She goes, when I was eight years old, I was in a store with my mom and they had had money and lost it all. Mom was holding bread in one hand and sandwich meat in the other and she didn't have enough money to buy both. And when I asked her skills 0 to 10 when she thought about that, how strong was the emotion? It was only like a two or three. At that moment. We used our EMP process. I cleared the poverty mindset. She has not called me one time in the last eight months about her portfolio. It's subconscious wiring. So when you combine, it's kind of this really good cohesive unit what you do and the stuff that we're running that combines into Sarah and I's world because when you can understand the person fully, you can instead of getting angry because the person's calling you all the time, you're like, well, you don't trust me. It's not they don't trust you. It's their own subconscious learned belief structure of I'm going to lose all my money. That's what they're. It's not I don't trust Sarah, trust Nick. So the more Sarah and I learn and the better we get at this, we should probably have an indoc process, like second appointment, you're taking your. Why so now take it. We're going to document it. We'll keep it on file. I wouldn't hire Bettina until she did it. I said I don't care. You're amazing. My wife loves you, but I'm not hiring you until I know your why. And we did another process, the Colby, and it hasn't. Is not worked against us yet. We've done the Colby and why with everybody. That's worked for us, and it's amazing. The results before train wreck after smooth sailing. So am I wrong, Sarah, or is that right on?

You are not wrong. Dead on.

And I love that because you learned that through our mutual friend Jerry Luhman, who uses the why along with the Colby. And it's amazing when you understand why people do what they do and then you understand what they have energy for based on their Colby. And so you put people in the right seats on the bus so they can have the best performance. Nick and Sarah, this has been so much fun. You guys have been great guests. What question did I not ask you? What question are you thinking? You know what? I want to answer that question. Because no matter how good an interviewer we are, we forget something. Is there something you want to talk about that I didn't ask, or is there something, a topic we want to cover?

Back when we first started dating, we read the Five Love Languages. That was the book of the, you know, the time. And that helped us some, you know, understand each other. But if I could encourage anybody, I guess it's not a question, but if anybody's on eharmony like we used to be here. No, I'm just kidding. Dating, doing your why for your own self and then your partner. As much as it helps in our business, on the personal relationship front and with parents with kids, as soon as the kids are old enough to take the assessment, what would you think is the minimum age that someone could take the assessment?

Great question. We've had kids as young as seven, which is my daughter. Take it. And it's pretty accurate. What we want to do is make sure people are. Their why is wired. You know, people ask me, is, is your why? Are you born with your why, or is it based on your experience? And the answer is yes, as you guys know, it's both, right? Some of it's innate, and some of it our surroundings have to do with it. But I for sure would recommend it for teenagers. Anybody above 13 years old, you're going to get a good result from the why, and it's going to be pretty accurate. And that's probably where I would draw the line in terms of now our daughter, because she's a good reader. We were able to get her. Get her through it, but we still had to help her at nine now. And her why has not changed. It's still challenge. So, Nick, how about you? What about. So the question for you, Sarah, was I'll do this Jeopardy style. What would you say to a couple that is dating about taking the Y, which you answered, which was perfect. What about you, Nick?

On a couple that's dating or just on the why in general?

What question have I not asked that you would like to answer?

Well, honestly, my question to you or my challenge to you would be if you could create.

Kind of a template on how people in our world or even couples can use the processes. Right. Because I know we're talking about why, when you do combine it with the Colby and Sarah bringing up the love languages, like I'm, you know, words of affirmation and physical touch person, we could truly do. Like, honestly, I think between what we do at 22:0, what you guys are doing and what we're talking about right now, love link, we can literally heal the world. There's so much angst out there right now that if we could bring people back to where more of us have that grace and can give each other that space and understand each other better and focus on how we're the same, we might be internally wired a little different, but understand that we got to start bringing people back together and if it's not leaders like you and Sarah and Dan, who's going to do it, right? So I think we owe it to people like that, and maybe we can do some collaborating between us on a professional, personal level and 220 to where we can start showing a bigger movement of that because it's profound. You know, when I met Jerry, just to say one quick thing about Jerry, he's one person I've met in my life that I just. You could tell he was genuine and his better way and share it. It was just like my contributor just came out like, dude, this is awesome. Have to share it with the world. And he's always shown in his actions with me that he does want to help, and he does want to help me find that better way and share it, and I have some of that in me. But I'm eternally grateful for Jerry and what you guys do and the grace that my wife has given me because I'm not easy to deal with sometimes, and she gives me a little more credit than I probably deserve.

That's awesome. Well, thank you guys both for being on. We want to remind you that if you're listening or you're watching, go to yinstitute.com use the code Y2Y so you can get 50% off. Off youf Y Discovery we have heard some amazing stories from both Nick and Sarah today. I want to thank you for being on and I look forward to talking to you some more offline. Nick have a great day everyone and we'll talk soon.

Thanks, Dan.