Using Your WHY for Impactful Storytelling

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Hello and welcome to why. To why. So how can knowing your why help you tell your story? We have an amazing panel today of storytellers that are going to talk to us specifically about that topic. So we are excited to have today with us professional storyteller and Go Narrative founder and CEO Matthew Woodgett.

Hello.

Hi, Dan. How's it going?

It is going fantastic. I'm so glad to see you, Matthew. And I'm glad you popped up right when you were supposed to. We also have with US elevation 180 CEO and Y Institute partner Jerry Lujan. Let's see if he makes it on.

Hey, Dan.

Hey, Jerry. Welcome, welcome. So glad to have you here. We also have Kevin Martin and Lisa Schermanhorn. Schermer Horn from Peak Performance Coaching Mindset coaching. Let's see, it's all the way from Vermont. So we've got Albuquerque, we've got California and we've got the, the, the Northeast represented. And then finally we have Jennifer Erment who is a marketing consultant and she's joining us from the middle of the country. Atlanta, Georgia, right?

Yeah, we were more southern than middle, but yes.

All right, we're going to call you.

Southern in Atlanta for sure.

I guess I'm calling you middle because you're between Matthew and Jerry and us and Lisa and Kevin. But welcome everybody. This is going to be such a great conversation. You know, we were chatting before about the fact we've got quite a few challenge wise in the group today. So we were making our good friend Jerry Lujan a little nervous because he likes things clear and he likes things to be better. So we're going to try to outdo ourselves from the show that we did a month ago. So, so let's get started. Let's get started. We've got some great whys, some great hows and some great what's here. But Matthew, this is about, you know, this came together because of you. I reached out to you and wanted to see if you could help us put together a show and man, you took the ball and ran with it. You talk about storytelling and everything that you do and you're a person that likes to do things differently. But what's really cool is you have a cool giveaway today. So I wanted to give you a chance to talk about it.

Absolutely. So we're giving away today one of our coaching and consulting services which is our story why. So by going through our story why process, you actually get a discover your why, discover your how and your what and then understand how to take your why, how and what and apply that into the stories that you tell first about yourself and about your company, but also then about your customers and your marketing materials and even setting you up down the street to even use that for things like problem solving and strategy. So we're actually giving that away today. It's $997 of value and super excited that somebody on the audience today is going to get to go through that process with us, discover their why and then totally up level their storytelling.

That's amazing and that's a great gift. Thanks for being so generous with that. Matthew, why don't you get us started? Matthew, tell me a little bit about and you know what, let's do this for everybody. How do you or your team members tell their stories using their why? Tell me how that has changed since you discovered your why and you started using that process.

Well, actually, I think the question should be how can you tell a story without saying why?

Right.

And the way that we think about it is stories are a journey and they have emotion in them. And whatever it is that you do, it's driven by your why. So when we're talking about something that happens in your life, something that happens in your employees life, something that happens in your customer's life, your interaction with that and how you talk about it and the stories you tell about it have to include how you approach things. And how you approach things is your why. So once you understand your why, you, you can get much more intentional about applying that to the stories you tell, the journeys you take people on, and of course triggering those emotional states that are going to get people to remember your stories.

Fantastic. Now we have on the panel today Jerry Lujan, who, you know, as I told you, Matthew, he's a great storyteller. Jerry, I'd love to get your take on how your storytelling has changed and maybe take a little bit of what Matthew talked about. Give us your take on it.

Yeah.

Thanks, Dan. I agree with Matthew in that, you know, humans were meaning seeking, emotional creatures and yet most people don't really utilize emotion. They utilize facts and figures when they're talking to people. And no one remembers facts and figures really, but they remember the emotion. And the best way to achieve emotion, in my mind, at least it has been for me, is I kind of struggled throughout my life to understand why I always did what I did. It always almost seemed like a curse. And I wasn't quite sure how to tell it to people. And so when I would say things, I felt people would make up their own narrative. About what I was all about instead of me being able to portray what it was and when I learned my yos, why, how and what, it just became much more authentic from me to be able to connect with people because it was. It was real now. And mainly because I was just so clear about myself. And once I got clear, I got confident. And once I got confident, I felt like I was free.

So that's. That's what's helped me the most.

Fantastic. And so I love that you talked about that freedom, that understanding that. But maybe we should. You know, I'm going to. I'm going to test our new coaches. Jerry, what is yos and what does it consist of? I'm going to ask Lisa, give us that definition because we're talking about it, but we've got people listening that may not have heard of this before. Tell us, Lisa, what is the yos?

You know what? I like to keep it simple. It's how you. It's about you being in alignment with everything. Because once you know your why, your how and your what, it's how you're aligned in your work, in your home life. I laugh. You posted things. How you buy a car, how you order a restaurant in a restaurant. I'm a challenge person. I always. I remember going to Costa Rica with a group of friends and ordering these raw ceviche, which was everywhere. And all my friends would sit there and go, oh, my God, that's so disgusting. I'm like, you guys are missing out. I'm always trying to do things that are a little different, a little out of the box. And. And once I got a chance to really own it. Because what I'm fascinated with is people who, once they find out their why, they get to own who they are. And many people have shame around the challenge part. So when I grew up being different and not feeling like I fit in, I was able to shift my mindset to, oh, now I'm a visionary. Now I see things that other people don't see. I see things in a different way. And that was really exciting for me and it boosted my confidence and it's done that for my clients as well.

Perfect. So I love what you said that and I love what you posted about your engineering consultant with the why of simplify who felt like he wasn't bringing value because the people he worked with liked complicated things. So give us a little bit about that because I love that story.

It was amazing because he's a consultant to engineers, and so he would get these emails that were five Paragraphs long and he would want to respond in three bullet points. But he had a lot of shame around that because he felt that he wasn't contributing enough to his response, and he really didn't. He struggled with his value of what he was bringing. And so I helped him. See, I said, no, you don't understand because now that you have the ability to simplify, everyone can understand the complexities of what these engineers are talking about. So lay people can now better understand. So now you need to triple your income. Now you need to triple what you charge because now your value is so much more. And he said to me, I felt so much shame about it because I didn't understand my value until I learned what my why was.

Love that. Melanie Ake just commented, owning your why. She says, love it. And that's exactly right. That's what you did for your client there. So we have one person that's not one of our coaches that's on the panel, but has an amazing background. Jennifer Erdman is a marketing consultant. She helps people build brands. And Jennifer, I don't even want to try to tell your story. Tell us a little bit about what you've done and then give us your insights because you were introduced to the why by Matthew, but tell us what it's been like for you since you discovered your why. But I would definitely want you to share with our audience your background.

So background is 20 years in corporate, but predominantly in entertainment. So working on the corporate integration marketing side for brands like AT&T, into shows like American Idol and Dancing with the Stars, the Olympics. And then I worked at MTV Networks for a while and really integrated into properties there. And it's funny because when you talk about the why, for me, it's a grounding and it's like a North Star. So as soon as I realized what motivated me and what didn't motivate me, it was very easy for me to look back in various scenarios of why things worked or why they didn't. But also as we move forward and we work with big brands now, getting into industries that they're not normally in, like in esports and gaming, and you have all these different people at the table, I think what's going to be really helpful in encouraging them is to know who they are in the room, what their why is, and how do we communicate with them in a way to be efficient and effective and understand what makes a fit and what doesn't. So it's really. It grounds me as the leader and the CEO of the organization. But it also provides me a blueprint on how to work with the people at the table. And I think that's what my team will learn most, is when you start looking at the different personalities and the different motivators and what their why is it will help us make sure we have the right people in the room or also know why somebody walked out of the meeting going extremely frustrated. And to the point earlier about the engineer, it's really interesting to hear, like, am I contributing? None of this doesn't feel like I'm fitting in, but when you have the right people at the table or you know that it's going to be a little bit different for them, it's an easier conversation and it's a validation and a calming versus like someone walking out, not feeling valued or I don't belong on the team. I just think it provides a blueprint for us moving forward. So I'm excited to see where it goes.

Fantastic. And you brought up a great point that we've talked about. So next Wednesday, I'm doing a workshop for leaders. So how to use the yos as a leader, how to get to know your team. And I was talking to one of those leaders yesterday, and I said, you know, I'd love to have you on because you've gone through the whole process so we can share with people how it's made a difference for you and what he said, and I'd love to hear your thoughts. Kevin, I'm going to call on you. What do you think of this? What he said is, you know, more important than me knowing the yos of my team members. I think it's so important for them to know my yos because now they know what makes me tick, what turns me on, what makes me come to work every day. Kevin, have you seen that?

Yes.

Yes, I have.

And you know what? That's something I discovered a long time ago in corporate is once you know what your manager.

What your boss, what makes them tick. And yos is exactly that, what makes you tick. By the way, I love the DOT os. I come from a technical background in an OS operating system is really the foundation of what makes you tick in the first place. When you have your why it's all about that. If I were working for somebody again and I knew that they were a challenge like I am.

I would actually always be proposing something different, something new, and something really out of the box. And I will tell you that knowing that, what they were and really identifying with those attributes of it, we'd be aligned all the time, we'd be aligned all the time. So I think it's really important for people to know at the different levels what their why and what their yos is.

Yeah, that's fantastic. Matthew, you made a comment and you said Storey is the API.

Yes, absolutely. In fact, I was chatting with Park Cowell about this on his podcast a couple weeks ago. It's, you know, if the operating system is the why, it's what makes you tick, then how you actually interface with the world is through story. And it's literally because we're actually trapped inside this, this prison of bone, right? Our brain is in there and for it to actually interact with the world, it uses story, right? So we put ourselves in stories. We understand other people through stories. It's why we love movies and books, which are just artifacts of how our brain works. And why our brains love them so much is because of, that's how they see the world. And so stories of the API that enables us to connect with other people.

Yeah, I love that. So, Matthew, while I've got you on, I'm going to ask you a question, because this is a question. Tell us your greatest triumph story, success story, and tell it to us and obviously tell us in your story format and apply it to your why.

My greatest triumph? I hate talking about my greatest triumphs. I, I, you know, I would say that, you know, my, my greatest triumph was, you know, quite frankly, becoming, becoming a father. You know, it's something that I always thought that I wanted to do, right. Very unchallenged, right. Something that you've always done, that you always expect, but really being able to challenge myself as a parent to constantly get better. You know, my, my 11 year old was drawing a Godzilla versus King Kong yesterday. He spent two days actually working on this picture and watching YouTube videos, trying to figure it out. And he was getting, he made a few mistakes and he damaged the paper a bit and he was using tape and he was getting really upset because he'd been working on this for so long and so hard and, and I sat down with him yesterday and I was talking about the importance of taking a break, right? Giving your brain a break, right? And just in these little moments, every time I look at my children, when, when they've got challenge, when they're struggling with something, I ask myself the question implicitly, how can I help them think differently about what they're doing to help snap them out of it, help them get around that corner? And so I use that every day. And it's funny, it's like this little secret tool that I've got in my tool chest of parenting that I didn't even realize I had.

I love that you called it a secret tool. And I saw Jerry smile as soon as you said that. So I'm going to bring Jerry because Jerry taught me something. Jerry and I have known each other for a while, but really started working together when I started at the Y Institute. And he calls it an unfair advantage. I know that's probably what he's smiling about, but Jerry, tell us what made you smile about that.

Yeah, I think finding the secrets that are within us, I do refer to them as unfair advantages. And when you can get that clear about things and kind of live into everything that you do based on your, your, your yos.

It just becomes so natural. And the, the connection comes so much quicker, I'd say, because that's, that's who we are. We can't help it.

Right.

And when we can have, as I said earlier, the freedom to just live into it.

Right.

You know, this world is, is when I said before about humans are meaning seeking, emotional creatures, it's all about connection. And especially in today's world, I think connection is more important than anything. And so everybody that's on this panel, they understand themselves so well. The ability to connect with others is now and is going to be even more important of an unfair advantage as time goes on.

You know, it's so funny you bring that up, Jerry, because as the chief growth officer, I get probably the chance to introduce more people to the why than any of us. Because every day I talk to people who are saying, what is this why? But the part that I really enjoy as a contributor, and I know it's because of that, is just making those connections with people every single day. And not all connections are great, but I can tell you 90% of them are. And that's what keeps me going. I wanted to pull up a comment that Michelle G. Sent put up. She said the shame piece is a big one. Thanks for bringing that up. And we have a lot of challengers on the call. You know, people with the why of challenge often grow up feeling like the oddball. Like, oh gosh, I'm different than everybody else. And.

Until you live into that, you don't really understand that and that it's a gift. And Lisa, you brought it up. But Matthew, I'd love for you to talk a little bit about that.

Yeah. You know, for me, I think there's several of us recovering corporate people right on, on the call here today. And I really, I, I experienced that very, very viscerally. I spent the best part of 20 years at intel and at Microsoft and I was kind of indoctrinated into that because my father worked at Intel. I grew up, you know, being exposed to the tech industry but, and managed to survive quite, quite a long time as a challenge in, in that environment. But I really got to the point where I was telling myself, like Matthew, you just need to shut up, right? Just let, let the meeting kind of unfold. And I would try and do that, but inevitably my hand would kind of raise up and I would ask a question. I just couldn't help myself. And it just really manifested for me in that environment as a glass ceiling because I just wasn't, you know, I wasn't a right way or a better way or it makes sense, which I think a lot of the people in corporate environments who are successful in those environments are able to do. And to be fair, you know, I considered my, my career in corporate America America to be successful. But I also realized there was something missing and, and was really. It wasn't until I went through a series of life events and left, left corporate America and eventually discovered the Y Institute as well, where I was able to start to have the light bulb moments where it's like, this is, you know, this is, this is how I function. This isn't a problem with me. This is actually a real benefit. And nowadays what that means is I can go back into those environments as an outside force and help them think differently. And the big secret, by the way that I've discovered is you'll find across most of corporate America that if you're inside that environment, the executives generally don't want to be challenged. However, they will go externally and get their own secret weapon so that they can challenge things internally and they can have ownership of that challenge. That's a little one you should keep.

Keep in mind that is that, that is great. You know, Jennifer, I see you nodding your head and laughing.

Yes, it is 100% true. Yes.

So. So Jennifer, you've had such a, an amazing career. You've done some, some amazing things and you've been involved with some shows and products that all of us are familiar with. But I want to go away from what I asked Matthew. His biggest triumph. What was your biggest failure? What's the thing that you. Because we learn a lot and we want to hear that story. We learn from our failures.

How much time do we have?

I will add to Matthew, before I go to where I failed, I Will say Matthew is spot on. That's why I started a consulting company when I was internal, because I'm a better way and then a challenger. So I'm like, if I have to do what you're telling me to do, there's got to be a better way to do it. But why are we doing that? Inevitably, the next question I will ask longer term and inside the company, you are not a team player if you challenge too much. But the moment they paid me to come in as a consultant, I was a genius. So it is very, very different. And I think there's that it's the people that you're working with, their why look at you so much for those who are like make it work and all the other attributes that fit well in corporate. But to Matthew, I lasted about 20 years and I was very successful. Area I was not successful is when I didn't listen to who I was and I tried to force myself into a position that I knew wasn't a good fit. And it was a position, not necessarily the company. But when I first took the position at MTV Networks, I was pinching myself. I get to go work there as a senior director of marketing. This is being a Gen Xer like I grew up on mtv. This is amazing. And by day three, I knew it was a mistake of gargantuan proportions. But I had already moved my family across the country. We're now in New York City. I went from a 5,000 square foot home to 800 square feet. There's no turning around. What do you do? And it takes some soul searching and realizing what is not the fit. Why am I not fitting here? And I managed to navigate the waters. But it took me some time to figure out what part of Viacom I belonged in and with what group. It was very clear that I was convincing myself I could be what they need in this role. And they pursued me. And it was the romanticizing of this is amazing. They want me to do this. But in the back of my head there was a gnawing, nagging feeling and I suppressed it, didn't listen to it, but then had to deal with it and listened earlier and knew based on what I would be doing what, what my why was it wouldn't have been a decision I would have made. It led me to good things, but I had to deal with that muddiness and some untangling of things to landed where I needed to be. And I could have looked at the team I was working with and known that they were the corporate people. And That I was going to come in and I was going to improve things that they didn't want to have, improve the better way. I was going to challenge them on things that they're like, we're good. Why are you even bringing it up? Right. And clarity was not something anyone cared about. So it was a very mismatch. And I knew it and I ignored it. And that was something I learned really early on, like, too late, but learned to never do again. Not to romanticize it because I want it, because I will not change. I know who the core of. I mean, I'll be better versions, I hope, but the core of me is me, and that's okay. And that's why the shaming part, I was laughing about, Matthew, when you said that. I'm always like, okay, I'm not going.

To say a word.

I'm like, who we kidding? No, that doesn't make any sense. And it starts. But when you're in the right group with the right people, it's embraced. But when you're in the wrong group, you literally leave going, what is wrong with me?

Right.

And it's not. You're just in the wrong situation.

Yeah. And, you know, and Jennifer, one of the things we talk about a lot at the Y Institute is how your yos kind of becomes your filter. Right. Going forward. Had you had this filter ahead of time, you would have said, okay, at this position I'm being hired into, are they looking for a better way to do things? If they're not, I'm not going to fit real well. Are they open to being challenged? Because if they're not, that's not going to be a good thing. And is there some clarity? Are they seeking clarity? And if they're not, those are three big no's. Right.

The answer that would have been no. And I went ahead anyway.

But we learned. We learned.

Yeah.

And that's the thing, the reason I brought it up, because as we tell our stories, we learn sometimes our biggest lessons are in our failures. Right. And so coming from that environment where. Where you know, you. It was your dream job, but it didn't quite pan out for you because you were looking at the position, not so much the fit. Right.

So absolutely.

Jerry, you do a great job of when you work with your clients, you're helping them set and create goals. And how do. How does the why help you help create and set those goals so that they're looking at the right things based on their yos?

Yeah. You know, you were talking about filter.

And it, you know, it wasn't till seven and a half years ago that I discovered my why. And I, I've always been a big goal setter myself. And as I started coaching and mentoring other people, helping them get clear on what they're on what their goals are, you know, I'm not a proponent that I set anybody else's goals for them. They have to set their own. But you know, you're talking about a filter. And I was such a big goal setter myself that it led to probably the biggest failure I've ever had in my life where I almost lost my family. And it all came when my 5 year old daughter Kelly asked me for an appointment one night to take her to the park. And that's when I realized that my goals are getting in the way of really understanding what's better and where, where I really need to be in life. And my goals were always very big and I didn't really know how to try and accomplish them except for work. And that's why it almost cost me my family. I got to where I was working 80 to 100 hours a week to achieve my goals and I realized that that wasn't a better way and that I had to find a way how to have a filter to really impact where I wanted to go. And so what I look at myself and what I look at with people that I'm mentoring is is it better? Is where I'm going, is it, is it better? And then when I go there is are we clear or are you clear? Am I clear? Because if we're not, then we're probably not going to have the resolve to complete it. And then finally.

My what is contribute? So I ask the question is, does it impact, add value or really make a difference? Or else what difference does this big goal make? And when I started doing that in that sequence, then things just started really moving for me. And it the filter that I have, if I can't answer those three questions, then it's really not a goal for me or that or when I'm mentoring somebody else for them to be clear enough as to where they're going. And then we utilize their own why, how and what as to where they're going. And let me one last thing on the sequence. Yeah, I didn't really understand until about, maybe even a year ago the why the sequence matters so much. And you know, I'd liken it this way is if you had a telephone number, you had all the numbers and you had the numbers right.

But you had them in the wrong order, then your call's never going to connect to anybody. Right. We might have them, we just don't have them in the right order. And if I'm finding it's the same thing with the Yoshi. Yeah. We've got to get crystal clear on the sequence and the order in order for it to really sink in, that we can live from the inside out. And then it becomes authentic, as we were saying, and real and clear. So that's how I use it.

That's a really clear point. And you have a tool that you've used with me about clarifying whether you're going to have that resolve. And the why has so much to do with that you talked about. If you don't answer those questions in the affirmative, you're not going to have the resolve to get through the tough times when you get to it. Right. So thank you for sharing that. Lisa. You, you put a comment, I want to bring that up. You helped the client give up an opportunity because you did your yos. So tell us about that real quick.

It was fascinating as I was working with a client who was interviewing with four different companies and she was waiting on bated breath from a company in New York City which had a tremendous amount of opportunity. What she thought was opportunity. It was a lot of money, very prestigious firm. And we went through her why? And she went, oh my God, this firm isn't in alignment with who I am and what I want. It's not in alignment with my why. And this would have been, you know, Jennifer. I think about what I was like.

Was her name Jennifer Erdman by chance, go back in time and stop what happened.

I thought of her and in your situation, because I was, I. She said, you know, she lives in Boston. She was going to move to New York City, leave her family, leave everything for this really big job. And she said no. And what she ended up doing is she found one of the jobs that was the lesser paying job but was in alignment with who she was, who she is. And it had the most opportunity in the area that she was passionate about. And she was so grateful. She said, you saved me so much time and grief and money and making opportunity to make a huge mistake in my life.

Yeah, that sounds familiar. Except I did the opposite. So, yes, you survive it, but I wish there was somebody just to hold you and go, listen, that doesn't match your why. It's not. You've got to put that emotion aside and think, okay, you don't just chase it because it's the shiny object you will be inevitably miserable. And that is the truth. And it's hard to look internally and to give up some of those shiny objects to know inevitably your road will not end the way you want. And it's going to be a harder discussion and a harder decision and more impact later if you don't. If you don't do it now, if you do it, you're going to have to clean up after it. And I. And I use that now as a guiding principle, right? There's a reason it doesn't fit. And sometimes you feel like you've lost, but ultimately, after you live through it, once, you don't lose anything, you gain.

I did that New York City thing in my 20s, and I took a job because my mom thought it was a great job, not because she wanted me to be in the fashion industry and 7th Avenue. And I went there and I went, oh, my God, this is totally not in alignment with my values, with who I am, nothing. And I was miserable. I would cry every day because I really had no sense of self. You know, I was young. I was thinking, this is what I'm supposed to do. And then, you know, much later on in my life, I finally realized what my values are and what's important to me. And when you. When you discover that you're in alignment with who you are, everything flows, everything starts to show up, and you start to manifest things like crazy.

Well, and one of the things as well, I love these, These. These examples from the past because it makes me think about what Jerry said about filters, is if you look at your life, once you know your why, you will be able to identify the moments that worked out really well as being moments that were aligned to your why and moments that didn't work out as being moments that didn't align to your why. And it's funny because as we were just talking through this, I was like, I was thinking I was doing the same. I was kind of just running through quickly and kind of applying it. It was like the opposite of the New York story for me, was coming to the US right? I was living in Swindon. I worked at Intel. I didn't kind of like, where I was, like, in my life at that point. And I. I was challenging the status quo of my life. And I pushed for this opportunity to get nominated to come to the U.S. for six months. That was in 2004.

But, yes, when I look back on that, it's like that was because I challenged my status quo. And once you then know your why, every day, moving forward you have a higher probability of checking the box for success rather than just rolling the dice and maybe winning and maybe not.

I think one of the things, and I'll add to that really quickly, one of the things that I learned after I left there, there was a saying that I've kept since I've left New York, but it says until you make peace with who you are, you'll never be content with what you have. And it's one of those moments that I did have the big shiny office, I had the big New York City and I wasn't happy, right, because it wasn't who I was. And I think that's always stuck with me. I had all those things but they didn't make me happy because I wasn't being true to myself. And I think that's always stuck with me. It's what I'm impressing upon my eight year old daughter. It's, it's like, don't chase money, know who you are, be happy with who you are. Make your best version of you, but know why you're motivated to do what you do right and be good at it.

I love that Jennifer, you know, my daughter, every morning before she leaves for school I tell her just go be the best version of you you can be. And she's a challenger. So when you're nine years old and you challenge, you know, I love telling her stories that you, that fellow challengers share about being picked on because you're different, you know, and I tell her just go be you because that's, that's all you can do. So thank you guys for sharing that perspective. I'm going to bring it back to Matthew. By the way, all of you that are listening, if you'll put a comment in the chat, we're going to put you into the drawing for the, the prize that Matthew talked about in the beginning. So I need to hear from you. We've got a few of you that have put some comments in the chat, put your name in there so that we can put you into the drawing for that amazing giveaway that Matthew has. But I want to come back to you. Matthew and Joe, thank you for this comment. You know, you talk about your, the work that you do as a media collaboration specialist and leader, how important for people. Oh, that's my phone. Everybody's looking at their phone. It was me that was ringing. I have to decline that. So I love that you talk about your why of trust and how important that is. But I want to bring it back to you. Matthew, why is it important for a leader to understand and invest in the team stories.

You know, the thing about storytelling is quite literally the fabric of how we work and interface with the world. It's. It's how we make sense of our place in the world. It's how we navigate the relationships we have in the world. It's how we communicate to try and get what we want in the world. And as a leader, if you want all those things, then you're going to be stacking the deck in your favor if you can understand your why and your team's why and also take them on that journey. But also, you've then got the fuel for the story. Right. I love to talk about storytelling as a value problem. Right. If you go back far enough to when we lived on the Serengeti, right. The value problem was where are the poisonous berries or the edible ones? Where are the lions? Where's the shelter? Right. Where's the water? That's it. Right. And so we would tell stories about where those things were, and the tribes who were the most effective at communicating were the ones that survived. And now we're here because of them. Nowadays, the value problem is a little bit different, but it's still there. And when you understand your why, your team's why, your company's why, it sets you up to be able to effectively communicate how you fit that value into your customer's equation. Right. Which is your. The edible berry that you have, how are you going to communicate about that to your customers so that they're going to get that berry and take it forward? And it all starts with why. The reason why I fell in love with the why Institute in the first place was Dan. When we first met, it was just like being hit by a freight train. It's like, I talk about this stuff already. We use techniques that draw out the why already. But here we have this process. This tool is 5 to 10 minutes of tool that folks can go through and then go rolling from there.

Yeah. I love that, Matthew. Yeah. And it's funny, we talked about this earlier. When you know the yos of yourself and then the people you work with, you kind of start noticing who you really click with. And you and I have some of our top three in common. And so then we connected that way. Even though I'm a contributor, I have a pretty. As Jerry will tell you, I'm pretty high on the challenge. My how is pretty strong. And so I really connect with people with the why of challenge. And I think that's probably why we're all here together today. So let me bring it to Kevin. Kevin, and you both can answer.

How has adding the yos, what impact has that had on your practice?

Adding the yos for ourselves, it's helped us identify who we are and how we're working. But as Lisa said many times, our. Our messaging became instantly clear. We had gone 10 months thinking about, you know, we wanted to put up a website. We just couldn't get the messaging right. And within two weeks of getting our yos, our website is up. Our messaging is. Is so clear. So it has had a wonderful and huge impact.

Yeah. What about your clients?

Well, the best part is we have the same why and the same how. So we speak the same language. And so it's awesome for our clients because they get to hear from both of us the same message. So it's from the business. And the two of us finish each other's sentences often, and we think alike. We have the same values. Kevin also has the contributor, and he's been an amazing partner. I highly recommend hiring contributors or partnering with them. They are. He makes me better all the time. I'm telling you. He does. He's amazing.

And you're the same. Lisa. You know what's also interesting is it's our personal message. When you're chatting with somebody, you know, you don't just say, oh, I'm a mindset coach and this and that. You start to say, well, you know, I love to challenge people. I love to work with people who. Who think out of the box. You know, when you start to bring the language in your discussion right there, it really makes a difference.

Yeah. And I love what you guys are talking about, how you go together. You know, what we don't want to do is give our people that are listening the thought that you have to have the same why to get along. Because I'd love to hear a little bit more, and I'm going to let you start it, Jerry, of how important it is to have the different whys. So somebody with a challenge why really? Or better way. We need some right ways on our team. We need some trust people on our team. So, Jerry, can you talk about that? You probably had the most experience working with teams and helping them put the whys together.

Yeah. I'd say if you don't have anything unique, you're going to just be polarized and everything's going to be the same. And so having differences of views, opinions, ways that you go about doing things, I think is kind of the essence of. Of creativity and. And moving forward as long as you understand each other. And what I, that's why I'm so excited about, about this and this conversation and sharing this with the world. Because we're all unique in our own ways and when we can really bring together our gifts and, and feel free to utilize them at the highest level and not be, you know, catching arrows all the time because, or people shooting that, it's personal, right? This isn't personal. It's, it's maybe just situational when there's conversations, but if you don't, as a matter of fact, like with almost all of you, if the way that you have the courage to think differently, but you know, you say things differently also and challenge people can kind of, they're be very direct and come at people. And if somebody doesn't understand that about somebody, then they think that they're being attacked, whereas that's not the intent at all about somebody who thinks differently. It's, let's open this thing up and, and, and look at all the different directions. But what I found is that if we don't understand the essence of each other, respected and appreciated as gifts, then it can create some, some stagnancy or maybe even polarization.

Whereas when we do know, I mean, it's so wide open and we can just move so much faster and further together.

Yeah, I think you've got, you've got somebody agreeing with you in the, in the comments. Greg Collino says diversity is key to a successful team. You know, we, we are in 2021, there's a lot of conversations about diversity and inclusion. And that doesn't always have to be in terms of race, gender or those types of things. It has to be about having different types of personalities and people on the team. Because as Jerry said, if, if we're all thinking the same way, we're all going to walk off the same cliff together. If nobody's there to say, wait a minute, is there a system in place for us to do this on our team at the Y Institute, we have that happen all the time. We've got idea people and then we've got implementers and we've got people that say, wait a minute, we can't do that unless we have this, this and this. And if somebody doesn't raise their hand and do that, we can have a lot of great ideas that never go anywhere or vice versa.

Dan, I have to agree because the way Kevin and I work is the fact that he has more tech background and I have more the visionary. You know, I come up with the ideas, but without him. He helps me ground it and then we implement together. It's like we work together as a team. So even though we have the same way of challenge, we still work differently. And so we add to each other and lift each other up. And it's been a great. And it's been a really great partnership because of that.

Yeah. Anyone else have a comment on the diversity part of your teams? How do you work with that?

Yeah, I think another part of it is there's certainly a resonance that you get when there's two people with a similar why, and that can be very positive. In fact, I remember know going through the why experience and. And feeling immediately compelled to update my LinkedIn profile to be very clear about who I was and knowing that certain people would be attracted to that. But also there's the. The where you have a deficiency in something. Right. Like two. Two of my team are absolutely fantastic. Are both contributes. Right. And it's the. The contribute is a. An important component of the success of go narrative. And your ability to, quote, unquote, advertise, Right. Tell stories, if you will, about what you are, enables people who don't have that to seek you out. Right. So some people might say, I'm out. No, that's not for me, and that's fine, and you can move on. But other people might say, we have a real gap there and we need help there. Whether it's contribute, whether it's challenge or whether it's mastery, whatever, whichever of the whys it is, it just gives you that ability to connect. Right. To have that conversation and then tell the right stories. Right. With the API, to transfer that back and forth and then figure out, is this something we're going to move forward together on or not?

No, that is perfect. And that's another way to use those filters, as Jerry brought it up, in terms of what you do. But it can also be a great filter of who you want to work with. You know, we have a saying at the WHY Institute. We don't work with anyone unless we know their why. And the people we work with don't work with anyone unless they know their why because it makes life so much simpler. Gary uses the example of, if I don't know your why, I'm going to try to guess what appeals to you in our conversation. It's like throwing stuff at the wall and hoping something appeals to you. But if I know your why, I know the words you're looking for. We've got a bunch of challengers on the Phone. So when we had our initial conversation, I know that I probably stressed a lot about how the why discovery was different, how we were going against the grain. And this is simple and different. And let me tell you why it's different. And every time you use the word different with a person, with the why of challenge, because what they do, they lean in. And so we. It's. It's that unfair advantage that Jerry talks about if you're talking to somebody who's wise. Clarify. I know that I need to add about 15 more minutes to the end of that call for Q and A because they're going to have a lot of questions. So it just gives us an opportunity to prepare for the conversation. Tell me how that's made a difference. Are any of you using the why, sending it out to your clients ahead of time so you know how to prepare for them? Lisa's laughing out loud, so I'm going to let her go first.

Well, going back to clarify, this is actually a funny story. I sent them the link to take their test, and it came up clarify. And then she needed to clarify that she was a clarifier. So she went onto the Y Institute and purchased the link and took it again.

I had to spend some time with her to explain what the clarification, you know, the qualities of the clarifier were, and realized that she didn't need to take that second test.

Love that, Lisa. I love that you just couldn't wait to get to it. So we've got only a few minutes left. I'm going to ask Bailey who's, by the way, we want to recognize Bailey Nielsen. She's working in the background making this broadcast work. So, Bailey, you've got a bunch of names of people that have made comments and given us their name. So I want you to draw a name and then put it in the chat so that we'll let Matthew, at the end of the. Of the show here, announce the winner of the prize, and we'll have you recap what that is. Matthew at the end. But I'm gonna go around, around the clock here. I've got Matthew on my top left. I don't know if it looks the same for you guys, but, Matthew, what's one thing you would want people that are listening to know before we hang up today?

I would say it's all about what type of change do you want to affect in the world? And then how do you tell the stories about that?

Right.

Excellent, Jerry.

You know, I'd say I. I say all the Time that I, I believe it's almost impossible for other people to understand why and how or for us to understand why and how. People don't just do things the way we do because ours is so natural to us. It's like just do this, find better ways, get clear, go help people. It works every time and it does for us, but that doesn't mean it does for them. So the essence of this is when we can understand ourselves and then understand each other, then we can move forward so much faster. Because that's the beauty of the world is we're unique, we all have our gifts and if we can understand what they are, we can have help each other live into them better, faster, easier.

Love that. Notice he started with better.

Kevin.

Yeah.

In my world, we talk about the fact that everybody has their own map of the world, their own model of the world from their experiences, beliefs and everything. And you know what, this fits in so well from understanding either your own or somebody else's map of the world. And it's just really, really ingenious how that works.

Fantastic. Okay, Lisa, last thoughts for you.

You know what? For me it's all about being in alignment with who you are. And so when you know your why, how and what it really like, it was like a, I was completely in alignment. I owned who I am and then I help other people own who they are so that they can be in alignment. And it's beautiful, it's a beautiful process.

Fantastic. Jennifer.

I would say a couple things. One, based on what Jerry just said about aligning with others and knowing I think I might have my mother in law do this together with me. Just kidding. She's amazing. Why would she think sometimes through different lenses? No, I think what I found interesting is a non coach, but a new y participant and fan is that no matter where you are in life or your career, this is something that will be applicable and it doesn't just have to be once and done. It's like you're just always good to go back and be re grounded or reevaluate whether it's personal or business, in your 20s, starting or in your 30s, 40s, 60s or wherever you are. It's always good to know that. So I think it's a really good grounding and a blueprint blueprint for your why things are motivating or demotivating to you.

Now that, that makes a ton of sense, Jennifer. You know, one of the things that I, that happens to me all the time, I'll do this with a CEO or an executive and they learn their why, their how and their what. And the very next thing they say is, just like you, I want my mother in law to do this or they'll say, I want my entire team to do this because it's going to be so valuable. So I'm going to put a plug in. So next week, April 7, it's on my LinkedIn profile, there's a link to it. We're going to do a yos for leaders. If you're a leader and you've got that one person on your team that you just are always wondering, why do they always do that? Why do they always do things that way? Let's, let's join us for that call and learn a little bit about how we can help you understand your teams better. But right now, Bailey, do we have a winner for the prize? And Matthew.

Let me let you talk about what that is and then I'm going to talk about who we're going to give that prize to.

Yeah, absolutely. What we're going to be doing is we'll be taking the lucky winner on the journey through why, through the personal OS development and then applying that to storytelling. We've got two frameworks. We've got the 3D framework and the trips framework. And so we'll teach and coach that lucky winner on how they can not only understand their why, but how they can use that why to fuel their stories moving forward and also.

Spread that out into the world, get better at storytelling, help others with storytelling and hopefully spread the word of why as well.

Fantastic. No, that is an amazing prize. And coaches, I know we've got some of our coaches that are listening. They're not eligible. So we're going to draw a name and I think Danielle Goldsmith, if you're on, make sure you email me danyainstitute.com and we'll give you all the details on how to do that. I think. Danielle, where were you listening in from? I know you put it in there somewhere, but welcome. I think you'll enjoy getting to know Matthew. You've probably obviously already enjoyed getting to hear from him today. The other thing I want to make sure everybody that's listening or watching knows if you is that if you want to discover your why, you can go to our website right now and put in the code. Hold on one second. I have it here. It's Y to Y W H Y T O W H Y. Look at Bailey, she's on top of it. If you put in the code Y2Y, you're going to get 50% off. So you can discover your why. And there's a ton of resources on our website if you, after that, you want to, you want to discover your why, how and what, which we've been talking about today. You can look up a list of coaches that are nearby or you want to talk to one of our coaches that are on the call today? Absolutely, you can do that or just go to yinstitute.com and, and let us know what your next steps are. But this has been a whole lot of fun. I love that we brought people from all over the country together and, you know, December, In December of 2020, I didn't know who Lisa and Kevin were. You know, I think it was June or July of last year. I didn't know who, who Matthew was and introduced us to Jennifer. You know, there's a lot of things that this pandemic has done in terms of limiting our interaction, but this is one of the great things that has come of it, is we are making connections across the country. I talk to people in New Zealand, Australia, England, Finland. I talk to people all over the world. Now that Berlin, Berlin was yesterday that I probably wouldn't be talking to were it not for the pandemic putting me on zoom. And so I, I think, you know, we sometimes forget about the benefits of, and, and the, the positives that come out of the fact that we had to work in a brand new and different kind of world. So I want to thank Matthew, Jerry, Kevin, Lisa and Jennifer for just fantastic input. This has been a great show. I know that our media marketing team's got so many good clips from today. I can't wait to see what they do with them. If you're, if you have not been to the why institute website, it's ww.why institute.com they're, they're always putting out new stuff and they put it on our LinkedIn, Facebook, Twitter, Instagram. They're, they're fabulous. And there's some cool stuff on there. So, guys, thank you so much. Have a great rest of your day and we really appreciate you being on today.

Thank you.

Thanks for everybody for dialing in and listening.