Dr. John A. KingIndigenous Australian. 100% Human. Neo-Noir Novelist. Poet. Speaker. Performance coach. More than a Survivor. Terrible Golfer, Awkward Dancer🕺

Embrace Your Haters and The Wankers #dealwithit - living well with PTSD

26 Sept 2018 · 1 min

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1:00

In this motivational monologue, Dr. John A. King challenges the tendency of many trauma survivors to avoid triggers and the people who provoke them. He draws a parallel between cowering from bullies and cowering from "haters," arguing that while haters are driven by bitterness, we have the capacity to grow. King advises listeners to actively listen to criticism, assess its validity, and either incorporate useful feedback or discard it as worthless. By doing so, individuals empower themselves, diminish the power of their detractors, and maintain a stance of continual learning and growth—key components for recovering from PTSD and building resilience.

Chapters

Hey, look, this might sound strange to some of you, but, um, a lot of people spend their time running away from triggers. You know, I can't go here, I can't go there, I can't talk to that person. You and I would never cower from a bully, so why do we cower from our haters? Look, our haters will only ever be bitter, whereas we can always get better. And I want to encourage you to embrace your haters. Be able to hear beyond the mouth that's coming at you, the criticiser or the criticism. Weigh it up. See whether or not there's anything valid in it. Therefore, you're instantly empowering yourself and disempowering them. Look at it, assess it, and go, you know what? That's good criticism or advice. I'm going to take that on. That criticism has no value. I'm going to put that and the person to one side. This way, you're never bowing down and cowering. You're always learning and growing, which is absolutely key for recovery.