Lunch & Learn - Session 30

Well, hi there, everyone. Tom Powell here with Lunch and Learn, and I am coming to you from Sedona, Arizona, which is one of our second homes. And Candice actually kind of grew up in this area, which is an awful lot of fun.

When it was real Sedona, not commercial Sedona.

When it was real Sedona. It was a little different than this Sedona.

Can I just say we've got birthday boy Tom Powell. On the phone, on the, on the call. Yes, happy birthday. We'll pretend the Wicked balloons are for you.

Uh, thank you, thank you for mentioning that.

Your birthday buddies with your granddaughter. So happy birthday.

Thank you so much. I love, I love the age difference between me and Scout, my oldest granddaughter. She is, uh, 50 years younger than me, which means it was her 9th birthday. And so it's been very easy to— thank you so much, uh, through articulating, you know, what my age is. And of course I'm extremely old, but when she used to say I was 100, now she knows I'm just 50 above her, which is, you know, still super old. And, uh, so, uh, Candace is, is, uh, uh, one of our founders for the Founder Office, and our other founder is Jackie Kuiper, our general counsel. And we're going to learn a whole bunch about Candace and Jackie, and ideally you're all going to learn a lot about yourselves, or at least have an opportunity about it. Could you imagine instead of walking up to people and saying, "What do you do?" You actually understood why they did it. And what about if you actually more so understood why you did those things? I mean, people have been trying to figure out— I had dinner with my 3 older sisters last night. They've been trying to figure out why I do what I do for, you know, 59 years. Although I did make their lives much better when I came into the universe 59 years ago. They would agree, I think, most of the time. Anyway, our, our guest today is just an unbelievable friend, and I'm going to give him a shout out because you guys may notice that over the last few months, uh, there's less of me, which had never happened in my entire life, to where I needed to have less of me. I was generally always very fit, but somehow I crept up almost 30 pounds. And the kind of friend that you have is the friend that says, hey, you know, We both could lose a little bit of weight. How about we challenge each other?

Is that what this show is about today?

Yeah, it is. For 75 days, we don't drink, we work out twice a day. And this is the kind of guy that knows his why and his what and his how because he has studied it for decades. Who I'm talking about is Gary Sanchez. And another unknown fact for most people, Gary actually owns the intellectual property, the why Y, the actual trademark to Y, which is unbelievable because we talk about that a lot. Um, and we're going to start with giving— yes, we're giving everybody the QR code. Yes. Okay, so this has been a debate with our team. We're going to give you a code. Gary, we're so thrilled to have you on here. Tell us really quick what they're going to do with this QR code because they're going to be listening while we kind of chit-chat, but it's actually going to be— if they want to do it now or they can do it later, this is a great thing. So tell us about this tool.

Okay.

And welcome to the show, by the way. And, and just love to have you.

Thank you. And, and aren't you glad that we are done with those 75 days of hell? And, so that all happened because of a trip to a hot tub place at, in Santa Fe during Christmas and not wanting to get into that dang hot tub cuz I couldn't believe I'd put on some weight, which I'd never done in my whole life. But anyways, that started, so, Candice and Jackie, you probably don't know this, but I asked Tom, knowing 100% for sure he was going to say no, do you want to do this 75-day thing, you know, workout thing that's called 75 Hard? 100% sure he was going to say no. And he says yes.

I 100% knew he would say yes. And I said, is there a 75-day soft? I would do that.

And there is.

I did see there is.

Squishy. I thought you wanted squishy. I did. I said, is there a 75-day squishy?

Squishy. Okay. So what you're looking at on the screen is a QR code. So the bottom one is the one you're going to use. If you use that bottom QR code right now, you can take the software tool that I developed that finds your why, your how, and your what, and it builds your personal message for you. It gives you the words to answer the question, who are you? And we'll show you some examples of that as we go along today. But it's really critical in what you do if you're a founder in knowing who you are. So, you know, let's just start by condensing all of what we're going to talk about into 4 words. 4 words. This is it. Who first, then what? Who are you first? Then what's your passion? Then what's your product? Then what's your message? Then how do you talk about yourself? Start first with who are you, which is a very hard thing for most people to answer. The software tool will give you the words to tell the world exactly who you are, tell yourself and the world who you are so you can then use that in your messaging, marketing, and branding.

And so, well, so I, I'm gonna jump in there just for a quick second. Cause I, I, I've read the book here, meaning I've, I've looked at the next chapter that we're gonna be talking about. And when you have someone who is in the role of general counsel and they manage trusts and all sorts of everything in your business and then that is their life, at their core value, you would want their why. And you've got 9 of them you've identified, Gary, right? You want that person to have trust and have trust be their why, why they look at that. And then when you have a partner who's become a partner over the years, but, you know, many, many years ago— well, it's not that many years ago, but when she was born, she would challenge everything because I'm here trying to make chaos all the time. And she also, by by the way, loves a lot of chaos. However, she was just raised to be able to challenge and question anything up there. So, the unique talent, and this goes through our whole organization, when you find the right placement of our people, it's a lot about that. And then, it'd be hard to guess of what my why is, Gary, but it's about finding a better way. Better way, right? So, there's always a better way, which drives everybody around me, anybody that's with me crazy except for my other friends that are better Better Ways, which is, you know, some of my closest friends. So, uh, and challenges to get along with that too. But by the way, don't, don't Better Ways tend to marry like challenges, or that's something you're finding?

That is the strangest thing. Yeah. And, and it's, it is a challenge, right? It is a challenge for, to, to have that. But here's, here's why I think that is, is because when, you know, let me, can I bring up the screen that has the YOS on there? Would that be—

Absolutely. Yeah.

And then everybody will be able to see what we're talking about.

Are you able to bring up tools? Wow. Can he do that, Angela? You gave him controls. I never even get controls. She gave you controls, Gary. This is awesome.

Okay, so here is the why, the how, and the what for Tom, Candice, and Jackie. Okay, so let's go through Tom real quick. And what's going to be great about this is now you're going to see them from the perspective of why they do what they do. So what typically happens is when you meet somebody for the first time, let's go to Tom. We're looking at Tom there. This is probably not how he usually looks because he probably doesn't always have a hat on. But what you do is, maybe you do, I don't know. But you look at how someone's dressed, you look at their glasses, you look at their, what they're wearing, if they have jewelry, you look at what's in the background and you create a narrative around what you think you see. So for Tom, we might think that he's out in Australia somewhere getting ready to go hunt some kangaroos or something. Jackie's getting ready to cook something. As you can tell, she's in the kitchen and Candace is on her way to a party or gonna, she's got a bunch of balloons. She's gonna be. So we got party girl, we got the, the chef and we got the hunter. And so maybe that's what we would have said about them, right? That's how our minds work. We create a narrative. But now let's go through who you're actually talking to. So let's go to Tom. He's right here on the top. So Tom's why is to find a better way and share it. Tom is always in search of a better way. He can't turn it off. He goes to bed thinking about a better way. He wakes up thinking about a better way, and he's rarely satisfied. Does that sound right, Tom?

You know, the rarely satisfied is not, I guess, because that's the piece where I look at it and say, it's not that I'm not satisfied because I try and be very I'm so thrilled, you know, and Ernest, thank you for the birthday wishes. I'm so thrilled with where my life is. My life has really turned out pretty amazing. I had dinner with my sisters last night, my 3 older sisters who just, you know, were amazing to me. My grandkids send me happy birthday notes. My kids send me happy birthday notes. My team sending me happy birthday notes, my friends. And I just look at the fantasticness of my life. So not satisfied would not be, the exact, it would be more like, and what's the next year look like? I'm, we're starting to round the circle around and now what can I do even more? What can I figure out that I can break and start over again? And where can we go with this?

So let's ask Candace this question. Is, is, uh, your dad always trying to improve things? Does he always wanna push things to the next level?

Uh, yes. In fact, the song, so I, I think Satisfied has this like, almost negative connotation, like you're not satisfied, like meaning you're not happy. But I don't see it that way. I see it in more of this positive light of like, I got here, now what's next? And there's that song in Hamilton of like, I'll never be satisfied. And like a lot of the— or like, can't stop writing. Like, my dad cannot sit idle. He has to have a goal. He has to have whatever the next dragon is to slay. I would say that's definitely, um, definitely a big part. And usually cannot stop at one. He likes to slay like 75 dragons, hence 75 Hard, because one dragon would be super boring. Like all the dragons at one time. And then if you slay a dragon, you maybe like celebrate that win for a minute, but then like, let's get a bigger, badder dragon.

Yep.

What's next? Jackie, Jackie, save me here. Come here. That's not true. This is not true.

It's true.

Jackie's not even saying anything. She's just sitting there nice and quiet.

You know?

So do you, do you see that in him as well, Jackie? I mean, is he always wanting to improve things? Whatever it is, you get to a level, he's like, okay, now what can we do next? How can we make this even better? Yeah.

And I think what Candace said, the distinction is it doesn't mean you can't be content. And seek what's next or, and seek other flurry of things, other goals and purposes.

Yeah. And so how he goes about doing that is by challenging the status quo, thinking differently, thinking outside the box, pushing limits. Who says we have to do it the same as everybody else? Let's find a different, more exciting way to do it. Ultimately, what he brings is a simple solution. He simplifies it down to, okay, Here's a couple things that we really need to focus on. And so that's his why, his how, and his what. And, and how does that feel to you, Tom?

I think my team would laugh that they don't think that I simplify stuff, that I create chaos, and that they're left to simplify things. So what I do is that simplifying may not be my best talent. It's really checking the better way, you know, using Kolbe or other indexes, but I'm always looking for the simplest methodology. So to that point, one of the things that we're known for is the, you know, helping people with their storytelling for capital. And we've simplified it down on a very complex way, looked at it like it's a Rubik's Cube and simplified that down to 6 C's. And then we took it down to our investment probability framework to be able to move through that and say, look, this is the Betty Crocker way of doing it. And you and I have talked about this. So, like, you and your wife go out to dinner and you will take the same way because you've identified this is absolutely the best way to get there and there's no better way to get there. And your wife will say, "Can we go 13 different directions? You know, I want to go see the cows over here. I want to go see this." Or like, "No, it's not the best way to get there. I want this simplified." Or, "This is where the key belongs." "No, I actually like hunting for the key all day." So, you know, I mean, that's what— that's where it goes down to. It's like, no, okay, so there's rules on certain ways, and then the whole— because the whole rest of the world is open to be able to just make a better way and continually challenge. And challenging the norm, I think, is a great, great definition on that.

Yeah, yeah, exactly. And so now when you look at Tom, you know he's always looking for a better way, he's always thinking outside the box, and he's always trying to find a way to do this, um, even in a simpler way. Okay, so now let's take a look at Candace. So Candace, on the other hand, has the why of challenge. So this is the— what that means is she's already smiling.

I will tell you, when I got the email, it was like, I basically read it as like, you're a challenge, and I was like, okay, but it's not what it means.

No, it means that she doesn't, uh, you know, follow the rules. She doesn't, she doesn't wanna draw inside the lines. She wants to do it her own way. She wants to make it fun and different and exciting and push limits, think outside the box. How she does that is by always looking for better ways. She's always cataloging things that, that work even better. And ultimately for the purpose of contributing and adding value and having an impact on the lives of others. Does that feel right to you?

Yes, I will tell you the favorite part of my— so I've got— I took out my report again to read it for in advance of today, and obviously we had a birthday party for my daughter this last weekend, and the best part of my entire report was the parental relationship, and it was challenge people, make fun parents. Uh, you will most likely be your children's favorite friend's favorite parent because you relate to them and are so much more fun than other parents. And I will tell you, getting 11 girls out of my house this weekend, like, they don't want to leave my house because I, I am totally— I would say my proudest accomplishment is I am a super fun mom. And it's like, it is, I love it. It makes me so happy. And so that's my favorite part of my entire report.

And she and her little sister— yeah, so she and her little sister were dressed up as the wicked, uh, friends, right? And then, uh, her husband was dressed up as the wizard. And the little girls are running around the house and they are their, um, uh, servants. But they had an absolute chaos blast type scenario, which is both of us, and an awful lot like my mom, which was a super cool thing because nobody, none of my kids really got to know. Candace met my mom when she was little, but she doesn't have really a lot of memories. But that's a super cool thing because that exists today.

But I love that this translates not just into how I operate in my day-to-day business. It's like, obviously, this is an assessment of how I operate in general, and it is through and through how I kind of go about life, right? Every decision definitely follows this. And it's not that it changes how I do it. It's just now I've got a level of awareness about how I, how I go about solving problems.

And it's why I would choose you, Candice. If I'm looking for somebody who thinks differently, finds better ways, and wants to help other people have a bigger impact, You're that person. And if you were creating a product, let's say you had your— you are now a founder and you have your own product that you, developed, whatever it is, it would be about pushing limits, finding better ways, and helping other people have a bigger impact in their life. And that would be the messaging that you would talk about. That's why I would choose you. That's why I would choose your product. It's the essence of your message, your website, what you talk about on LinkedIn. What you do videos on. That's why I would choose you. Does that make sense? Yeah.

Thanks, Gary.

So you are thinking right now about a new product and, uh, you showed it to us before, before we got on this.

A product. I have one consumer of it. Do you want me to show it?

Yes. Because who else would come up with this?

Who, how many inventions do you make a day though, Candice? Or at least a week? It's crazy.

How many what?

Of inventions. I mean, like, here's how you slide on your ski boots better, and this is how we can do it. Yeah, it's crazy.

That's true. So, I love to decorate because I'm a fun mom, but I hate— I'm also— I like to contribute to our planet, and sustainability is very important to me. I was almost in tears throwing the decorations away because I try to save them as long as possible, and 9-year-old girls destroyed my— all of them. They were like, "Ahh!" And so, I was like, I need to make something that can't be destroyed. So I just was like, you know, I know how to do fringe. I'll make fringe decorations out of some recycled material and ribbons I have. So I was like, in advance of the next party, I'll get ready and start producing some fringe. This is like a nighttime activity for my sustainable party decor.

Right.

And that would be all about think— seeing big party decor differently, doing it better, and making sure it has an impact not only for your event but for our planet.

Yeah, that's a great— I see. Yeah, that's it. And that's just— you're totally right. It's kind of a fun way to see how I attack situations or problems or opportunities. My brain follows that path.

Yes, exactly. Okay, and so now Jackie So if you go over here, Jackie's why is to create relationships based upon trust, to be the trusted source, to be the one that others can count on. How she does that is by making things clear and understandable first for herself and then for others. Then ultimately what she brings are simple solutions. She decreases the complexity and says, here's the one thing we're gonna do, or the two things we're gonna do. And how does that feel to you, Jackie?

Really accurate.

Yeah.

So that is very different than Candace, right? And so Jackie's probably sitting here thinking, well, that doesn't really make a whole heck of a lot of sense, all those things we were just talking about, because I'm not sure that's how my brain necessarily works, but I could see how that would be good for you. And maybe you could take us through what you were thinking as we were going through these, uh, two scenarios of Tom and Candace.

I was thinking that Candice mentioned she only had one consumer for her product. She has more than one. She's got at least two. I will be one.

Well, and I've made you decor actually, now that you say that.

You've made me a lot of decor, including she knitted or crocheted a Christmas stocking for my cat that's this big. It's fantastic. I can see and appreciate how both of them operate and why. And I think understanding how people operate helps me get to trust. If you had asked Gary what my why was, just telling people, here are 9 things that can drive you, I never would have understood or recognized that trust was so important to me until I took the assessment. And then once I had that frame, I was like, oh, of course, if I don't have trust, like nothing's going forward. But once I have trust, it's pretty solid. It's hard to back out of it. I can always find a solution within a framework of trust.

And I remember when I first met you in Austin.

Yeah.

At the, yeah, at the AI Mastermind event. And there was something, I can't remember what it was, but you had to be asleep by 8 o'clock for some reason. You had an early flight or there was something about it, and we're in the middle of dinner, and I— and Jackie's leaving. I'm like, what? Where the heck is Jackie going? And Tom had to leave. And it was because you had something that you had to be asleep by 8, or what was it? I don't remember. But I'm like, I can't believe that. And you left right in the middle of the dinner to do— to make sure— this is what I said I'm gonna do, this is what I'm gonna do.

Oh yeah, yeah. Okay, I didn't really— I was wondering where you were going with that, how it's a trust that— yes, very. If I say it or commit to it, or if there's like a boundary or something in place. If I've said I'm gonna do something, it's already done.

Yeah. She—

here's the little backstory on that, Gary. So, believe it or not, because I am a Better Way, I have a hard time with boundaries, and I keep a team around me to keep boundaries and guardrails. And they say I generally don't even get to go out without a handler doing something to protect others and myself type scenario. So, we're gonna drive over to the dinner, and Jackie goes, I'll drive myself because or she's gonna get her own Uber because I am leaving at 8. I've set my boundaries this year. I'm getting better at boundaries because I also have this innate talent of being able to push people past their boundaries in certain ways. And she's like, no, I've set my boundaries, I'm leaving at 8. And I said, Jackie, I promise I will leave at 8 with you. Let's go together. I said, I'm trying to get to bed earlier and not drinking all the various things right at that time. And that's why I left, because I also— I made that commitment. I'm like, I respect that commitment. You've articulated that commitment. Now let me find a better way to do it. Well, let's do it together, kind of like 75 Hard, because I would have never made 75 Hard had I not had you in that scenario, because it wasn't just about the friend or whatever else. I know for myself I need those type of scenarios. Hey, I'm going to change speed just a little bit. We've already had 6 people in our audience that have taken the YOS, so please, uh, and, and, uh, Adrienne is here in Sedona, by the way. I just gave her 3 Restaurant recommendations, Ken, if you, you may jump on there and give other ones. I know Reva would have given, uh, some great recommendations as well. Uh, but those are, those are some things. And Ernest, again, thanks for the message. Uh, but please, if you have questions for Gary, put them in there. I'm gonna jump and take this a little differently because, yes, when Gary and I met, and we met through another really good friend of ours, and they start talking in this language about me, and he's like, oh, well, he's going to be a better way in a challenge. And before I ever took the scenario, it's just like, where that so clearly on my sleeve that it was just perfect right there. Right. And we end up becoming fast, really good friends scenario. I'm fascinated with this product. And so I came back and said to our team, everybody who does business with us, I want to know their whys. Not for me. I want to give it a gift to them. And it's also for us because if they communicate in a trust manner, We need to communicate in a trust manner to them. And if they communicate in a challenge, and so it helps us communicate, again, not in a manipulative way, in a way so we can fill the need that they're looking to get filled, right? So let's talk about that, Gary. How do you see businesses? You're all over the world. You're talking on stages like daily. Wherever I talk to you, you're somewhere else. And it's like, ah, I just talked to the meat producers over here and the pig shooters over here, whatever it was. Yeah. Yeah. So, I mean, tell us how are businesses implementing this? And you're a business guy. I mean, you came to this from business. You used to put people, your hands in people's mouths and talking to them about their why, right?

Yeah, I didn't, I never, I didn't wake up one day and say, hey, I think I'm going to develop some software to help people figure out their why. That's not how it happened. I did not. This isn't something I set out to do. I was trying to figure out my own why. How do I as a dentist in— I was in Albuquerque. There are 660 dentists in Albuquerque. How do I stand out from everyone else who does what I do? That was my initial thought. Why should somebody come see me? Yeah, I know I have all these extra certifications and I know I've done all these things, but everybody else says, yeah, I'm a dentist too. Ah, drove me crazy. I had, I had worked for 20 years to reach the highest levels you could get to in dentistry, and someone who didn't do half of what I did would say, yeah, I'm a dentist too. I'm just like him. No, that's not the case. But I didn't know how to talk about myself in a way that stood out from everyone who does what I do. That's when I heard about Simon Sinek and that whole Start with Why, right? That was back in 2008. I watched that TED Talk 20, 30 times. I read the book multiple times and I said, that is what I'm missing. I have a great what, but I don't know my why. So if you're listening to this and you've seen that TED Talk or read that book and tried to figure out your own why, it's super challenging, right? So, I just called Simon and said, hey, I need you to help me find my why. And so, he and I spent about 8 months together going back to my life, trying to figure it out. When I finally did, which I have the same why as Tom, which is to find a better way and share it in my dental practice, we stopped talking about what we do, crowns, bridges, fillings, all that fun stuff. And we started focusing on why we do what we do. What do we believe? We believe that life is better when you have great teeth. In fact, you can't have a good life with bad teeth. And All of our messaging and marketing and branding and everything was focused on what do we believe. So that's a really important thing for everybody. If you talk about what you do, you blend in with everyone else who does what you do. If you focus on why you do what you do, you stand out from everyone else who does what you do. But you got to know your why in order to be able to do that. And that's when I became so obsessed with this why thing.

Well, Gary, to that, So when we start about the conversation, when again, people are out there raising money and anywhere in their business cycle, they're always having to raise money. So I'm very clear about this. This is not just about founder, early stage raising money. If you're going to go get a bank financing, you are raising money, you're using your money because you're gonna put a personal guarantee on that. It's the bank's capital is coming through there. But trust me, they're going to tie up that collateral. So anywhere along the line and all the way through to the exit, again, you are searching for the right buyer for what you're doing. So if you tell your story appropriately and you resonate with the me-tos, the people who are looking to solve that, then you get it. And so understanding that why helps you identify the problem that you're solving. So we start with the problem you solve, then you move to how are we solving it, and then the next one is what happens if we actually solve this. And if you're telling it in a manner— I love the Joe Polish way, and I think Gene Jackson— you attract the people who are going to help you get there. And you repel the people who are gonna take you off track. And so that's really the model of raising capital. And this is so critical for it.

Start why first. I mean, no, who first, then what's your story? Who are you first, then what's your story? So let's, let's do an example. Let me just take you for example, and I'm gonna bring this right back up so everybody can see it as we go along.

Okay, so let's pick on Angela. Can we pick on Angela? No, come on, come on, pick on somebody else.

So listen, my intervention banner out.

It's my birthday.

It's your birthday? Yeah, so this is a gift. So, so if I were to just say, you know, what do you do, um, at your— you, you're having an event coming up, and I'd say, so Tom, what's this event you got coming up? And you say, well, we're gonna put some founders together with some investors and we're gonna try to create some synergy, or we're doing a founders event or a founder investor event, right? And so I say, okay, when you talk about what you do, you blend in with everybody else who does founder investor events, right? But if you started by telling me what it is you believe, I believe there's a better way for founders to connect with investors, for investors to connect with founders. And I believe that— that's your better way. Then I believe that we could do this differently. I believe that we could do it in 8 minutes on a chairlift if we help people simplify their message. To where in 8 minutes, for the time they get on the chair to the time they get up to the top of the ski run, they've simplified their message down to just what's important in their story. If all they do is tell them one story that is the essence of their product, I believe we can create an amazing connection. So now we have a completely different type of conversation than just we're going to do a a, uh, a pitch on a chair. It's why did you do that? What is it you believe? Because if I— and this is why it's so important, this is what I want everybody to get— your ideal client is someone who believes what you believe. If you— the better able you are to articulate what you believe, the more you will attract those people that believe what you believe. But if you don't tell them what you believe and you just hope they get it from what you say, then you're relying on hope, and hope is not a good strategy, right? If you just tell them, here is what I believe, it allows them to then raise their hand and say, yeah, that's what I believe, I'm in, or no, that's not what I believe and I'm out. It allows them to very quickly decide whether you are the right one for them or not. But if you don't tell them what you believe, again, you're just relying on hope. That's why your Y.O.S. was written the way it was. And it started— every one of you started with, I believe that success happens, in Tom's case, when we find a better way and are able to share it. That's why it was written that way. Because if I believe that, then I'm like, man, I'm in. I believe that too. Is that making sense?

Well, yeah. And I got to tell you, for everybody out there that's even thinking about it, What's the number one thing, Gary, you've heard? And I know the statement, but what is the statement you hear when people get what Candice was talking about? You know, when they get that piece of paper, what do they most always— yeah, what do they oftentimes say to you? Spot on.

Every single time.

Spot on. He hears us. So the creation of this technology, and for those out there who are building businesses, thinking about it in the SaaS, we have creative people all over the world that are listening at various points to this conversation. They come in, it's Gary saw a problem and it started with Simon Sinek and said, you know, here's how we do, but nobody can figure it out. They don't go through the book, they don't get the stuff. And there's no slight on Simon because he did the, you know, he's looked, talking about this and how important it is. But you're like, man, I can make this so much simpler. Yes, there's a better way to do this.

My why is to find a better way and share it. How I do that is by making things clear and understandable first for myself and then for others. And ultimately what I bring is a simple solution. So it's gotta be better, it's gotta be clear, it's gotta be simple, or I don't want it. And so this is a better, clear, and simple way for you to understand yourself, be able to articulate that to the world so you attract the right people to you.

So I'm gonna take this a whole different direction. I'm gonna bring Jackie, Jackie into the conversation for a minute here.

So before you do that, I I want to open up the Q&A because we've had a few people. So while you open up, change the kind of direction, I do want to also encourage people, you know, pop questions into the Q&A that we may get to at the end of today. If you did get your why, put it in the Q&A so we can see what you got.

Yeah. And you know what? I love that. I love that idea. So put your whys. And I saw one from Betsy, but we need to put it in here. Of what Betsy's is, uh, because came across through our text. But the, uh, the— I don't even know where I'm going, Jackie. I'm going to talk— I'm going to jump back to— we've got clients, and when we understand their why, because a lot of times when we're going through something, it takes a lot, especially on the legal side. And then a founder is like, I don't want to be doing this. So we're oftentimes having to talk through the why of why you need to brush your teeth because when you're 35 years old, you want to have a beautiful smile. And with a 5-year-old, they're like, that is so old, I don't care about that, right? So, us from a legal standpoint, explaining to people why they want to do something that's 10, 15, 20 years out, they're like, nope, I don't want to spend my time doing that. I want to go do this right now, right? But have we seen, have you seen in dealing with our own clients that we understand what their why is, and we can communicate with them faster of why they need to brush their teeth, essentially, that we've been able to move them faster through this, whatever process it is, whether it's getting their IP in place or their entities in place or getting their offering documents. What are, what are some things that you've seen?

Yeah, it's interesting because context matters so much, and I think we take for granted and presume that people have, are having, and will have the same or similar experience than us. And I'm gonna use Gary's example. This was great. When Gary was telling the story about how he noticed my, my why, trust, or how it played out, Gary said he remembered I left in the middle of dinner. I left in the middle of Gary's dinner, but I didn't leave in the middle of my dinner. I left at the end of my dinner. So it's, it's one reality with different— two different lenses, right? Maybe three different lenses, maybe four. So it really helps to create this level set of like, where might we have overlap of shared reality, and where might we be a little bit, um, not misaligned, but where might our reality— where are we taking for granted that it might not be exact, it might not be one-to-one? So Talking through things with founders, everyone is on a different journey. Everyone's having a different experience. Where can we hone in and understand, like, how they are living through that experience and how it may be impacting them and really what is most important for them at that moment in time? So yeah, this is a huge, huge value add to just not only better understand ourselves, but understand those we care about, those we serve, those we help, and then giving them the context and, and helping frame that.

Well, and if I can add to that, and I'm probably like, I don't know, maybe I'm overstepping here, but I've used your tool, Gary, for the seeing where— and you have other tools that I've used where I put in, I'm able to like how I work. And let's even say on like a personal relationship side, put in how my husband operates. Yes. And be able to see where it is that— because we were even talking, and we've, we've talked about this before, my dad and I have some similarities. And so even though my better way, or even though my, um, uh, why is challenge and his is better way, they flip-flop on the how for both of us. So sometimes we're kind of difficult to work with for other people. But I can translate, I think, a lot for my dad because he's so Better Way. And sometimes when you're in Better Way and you're just like, but I like can almost sometimes act as like a translator. I'm like, don't worry, guys, I have this one too. Let me help clarify. I'm the Rosetta Stone for his better way. And so, I think there's really nice ways that we're able to communicate as a team because just, it doesn't, none of this changed how we operate, none of it changed how any of our brains work. What it did was we can identify those in each other and it almost gave us a greater level of respect for how our brains work differently.

Yeah. Gary, I'm going to jump in there just for a second, though, before you go down that. Gary and I had this conversation. So this has also helped me in the horrible manager that I am because, you know, so I hire and retain great management, right? So I've always felt bad. It's like, gosh, I don't seem to get these skills. And most founders and entrepreneurs don't get those skills, right? They have to hire them. And we've been fortunate to be able to get great people along our way. And we have such a wonderful team now. So one of the key things about that, though, was is if you bring me a blank piece of paper and say, figure this out, I spin. I look like the Apple icon and I just spin and spin and spin because the amount of things that I am possibly thinking of, possible ways to go, is endless because each one has a better way. It's like, and my brain CPU runs at a super high speed, so I'm calculating all of these different things. So the second part was bring me Solutions and understand very rarely am I going to say, yes, run with that. I'm probably going to tweak it and say, do this, right? So as long as you understand it's never finished with me, you won't get your feelings hurt. But if you think you're going to bring me something— yeah, if you think you're going to bring me something that's finished. So these two things have helped, I think. I mean, my team should probably speak up, but I think it's helped with the team to understand this is a better way to work with me. I don't know.

Yeah, what you're, what you're all talking about is, um, the lack of language to having language. Before, it's about a feeling. This is what I feel, what I think, maybe what I think I'm seeing. Now you have language to go with what you're the— what you're actually seeing in that other person, so it can make sense to you. So before, you're like, Dad, you know, maybe Candace is like, and Jackie's like, Tom, you know, why, why are you not satisfied with this? I bring, I stayed up all night working on this and you tweaked it. Now it makes me feel like I'm not good enough or I didn't work hard enough or why did I even bother? I should have just given it to you. But now you know what he's doing is his mind and a little trick in working with Tom is always make sure you bring him the latest draft. Here is my latest draft. Not here's my finished product because he's gonna tweak it. Here's the latest draft. Then he has the freedom to be able to make changes and you don't get your feelings hurt. So you, what it does is it gives you the language to understand what it is that you're actually looking at, what you're seeing, what you're experiencing. And it'd be hard to tell. Go ahead.

No. So I was gonna say one of the tools for entrepreneurs that are out there, cuz I saw a couple people said the Better Way, right? So one of the other tools, like working with my assistant, my management team, and my other team members is I have a very limited time to make a comment. So I don't have unlimited time. It's just, here's a limited time for you to make a comment on this. Otherwise, we followed the instructions that you said, and it is being done. So I am no longer the bottleneck, right? Because for much of the career, it was the bottleneck of getting it perfect, getting it perfect, you know, going and getting it done. And that just didn't work because I've got great team members and they can execute on it. And I really don't know what's going to be the better way or not. I was just I'm just fucking with the thing. So, you know, just send it out and get it done. And so they know, it's like, okay, Tom's got a 24-hour before this goes out. And then when he goes out, he may say something down the road of the next time, can we do it? But he lost the ability to say, I should have checked that out. And that was a huge, I think, change. Jackie, I don't know, maybe for you too, because you, you a lot of times have to do this, but Kelly and Angela and Candace, everybody has to do this. And stuff. I'm like, nope, good enough. I didn't say anything. I live with it.

So it's a great way to build your team. What, what you saw on the screen earlier was a matrix of just who's on the call here. But if you had that done for your whole team, if you have a team, we do. And your team could be your accountant, it could be your lawyer, it could be your entire, you know, the people that are in your sphere. If you knew that about them, you would understand why they do what they do and how they work. And so you can connect and communicate at a higher level much faster. So one of the things—

nice to have a trust. It's nice to have a trust attorney, right? Yeah. Having a Better Way in that scenario would be at different times, but generally the entrepreneur is the one who's running the Better Way and you need the person that's the trust. But having a Better Way accountant might get you in prison.

Having a better way and challenge accountants. Might not be what you want to do. Don't have to be like that.

Give those entries.

The numbers can go in this box. They look good over here. What about that?

And I will say, I have done— I'm not— I don't give this kind of advice because there's been times I'm like, why doesn't it just do this? And And there's very good reason, but my brain of better way and challenge and creativity, you don't want me in that seat. You just don't, don't have me.

You want creative accounting.

Yes. Uh, I am very capable in finance and there's a lane for my brain and the way my brain works. And there are very clear areas where my brain does not belong. And so I think that is a great example of, you know, making sure your brain is utilized in the right skill set.

Let's get these codes back up there while Gary's talking. Let's get these codes back up there so people can see them because we're going to run out of time here. Gary, you keep talking to Jackie.

Yeah, Jackie, do you like numbers?

It's a really complicated question, Gary. Sure, I like numbers.

What do you like about numbers? What's 2 2?

It's 4. They're predictable.

Yeah, yeah, you can count on it, right? 2 2 is 4 this week and next week and the week after.

Yeah, yes, yes. I like routine and structure, and I like predictability. I like things I can trust. Yeah, um, it sounds quite rigid But I actually think that if certain things are in place, if trust is in place and hasn't been broken, it actually provides for a lot of flexibility and a lot of solutions. But again, trust has to be in place first.

And how do you do when somebody breaks your trust?

Pretty done.

Pretty much done.

Pretty done.

Yeah. That's a really important thing. So for those of you listening, if the significant person that's your significant other has the Y of trust, or maybe a future significant other, pretty important that you know that because once it's broken, not probably going to get it back, at least to the same degree. It would take a heck of a lot of work to get that back, right?

Yeah.

You don't really ever— I don't think you— I mean, watching it from the outside, you don't. And that is why, you know, even from my standpoint, which is funny because it says like, just because you don't have this in your top 3 doesn't mean you don't have it. You can actually really understand, especially as you've gone on and built businesses or successful lives, you realize, because if you look at our whole team, our team is— we've got all these various roles and different people and placed in there. And it even goes back to Jim Collins' book of what— gosh, now I'm blanking on the name.

The Right Seat.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. So, it's all about getting that in, you know, get the right people So, getting them in the right, getting them on the bus is not good enough. You actually gotta get them in the right seat on the bus relative to that. So, accounting is trust. Finance, believe it or not, is better way, 'cause both, like we said, Candice and I both have finance from that standpoint. And so, that's because finance takes the numbers and then we're like, yeah, 2 2 is 4. However, if we do this, it's 42. So let's do that.

And having the right partner on the bus, right? There have been accounting people that maybe don't understand how my brain works and they think I'm sitting here trying to do something like way outside because they're so rigid in their box. And I'm like, I'm going to always say like, what if we did this entity structure and what if we had this over here and what if this one over here? And is this— I do want to do everything by the book, but I'm also going to sit here and try to find a way to do it better and maybe slightly different and see if it gets better results. And sometimes it does, sometimes it doesn't. And I need that person who is like a Jackie and understands how my brain works that keeps me in the lines, right? Thank God. And is giving me that kind of leeway, right? And I think we all know it's not just accounting. We have, you know, sometimes it's been hard for us to work with marketing people because he is a better way. And so he'll get a final product and he pushes back that, hey, this is— I need this to be this, or could we do it this way, or next time? And so having somebody in those seats who also understands how you work and you understand how they work. And I think that's what's powerful is we did do this as an entire team. You took time with our whole team. You have just us three on now, but we actually had everybody on and we were able to talk about how we all worked. And I think it did give us a ton of clarity. Yeah, this— and this was great. Um, and it included every team member we have. Um, which is amazing.

So what—

and the 9 does not mean— the 9 doesn't look— yeah, go through that, Gary.

Yeah. So what you're looking at on the screen now is the YOS discovery actually goes 9 levels deep. And so this is all— let's just take Tom since he's at the top. This is Tom all 9 levels deep. So let me go through it with you really quickly. The top 3 are the things that give you energy. When Tom is finding better ways, thinking outside the box, and simplifying them to where they're actually doable, doesn't get much better than that for him. He'd do it all day long for free if he could, and he probably has many, many times, right? The middle 3 are still important to him, but maybe not quite as important. He wants it to be clear, he wants there to be depth to it, he's going to dive in very deep, and he wants it to make sense. What the bottom 3 are, the things that kind of zap his energy, or he's not really focused on, not really worried about. He doesn't worry about whether people trust him because he knows if it's better different and simple, they're going to trust him. He doesn't worry about impact for the same exact reason, because if it meets these 3, it's going to have an impact. And he doesn't want to be told there's only one way to do it because he knows there's a lot of different ways you could do it. Putting Tom in a box would be— well, how would it feel to be put in a box, Tom?

I don't know if you asked everybody else, how would it be? How is it to put me in a box?

That doesn't go well.

Exactly. Candice, how's it?

Well, I'm right there in the box trying to claw my way out with you.

So ugly. It's an ugly, ugly, ugly situation.

Trying to control you and tell you what to do. And yeah, not a chance that's going to happen.

It's like, even, even ask the US, even ask the US government on that one, right? I mean, take the court to the Supreme Court.

You don't make a good employee on my report. It literally says—

and you don't, right?

I don't.

No. But you'd make a great visionary.

Absolutely. I'm a fantastic ideator. I think for a while my, my title was Chief Whimsy Officer.

I think that was it.

Yeah.

Hey, I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I'm gonna take our time here because we are so past time on this, Gary. This is how people get you. Uh, we'll put that back up on there. The thing that I don't see on there, which I use often. I'm probably like your biggest user of Klient. I've actually had to probably get extra Chrome logins for it. I use your Delphi, your virtual Gary Sanchez. And so, when I meet someone, I give them this gift, right? So, you can actually sign up. I implore all of you, if you're building teams, to do this, figure out how to get and see Gary at one of his live events or go through his Y Institute and be able to get started into this process. We gave it to you for free for the people that were here. We love that. But knowing your people, the people you are serving, is a huge deal. But to really serve others, you need to, you know, know thyself. And so learn that about yourself and then learn how you do it. And a really cool thing that you can do is once you get it, you go to Gary's virtual because you can't ever reach Gary, uh, and then you get Gary's virtual and you ask it questions, and then you take it back. And Gary did this a long time ago. He takes my, then my LinkedIn, and he's like, let's rewrite your LinkedIn to actually be more in line with your why, so you're attracting the right people into there, right? And so that was, that was a cool thing. Um, so how does somebody get to Virtual Gary? Well, you know, what is that link?

We could put the link up why don't we do that? Maybe we'll send it out to everybody who was here. So what, what, what Tom's talking about is I have a clone. I put over 5 million pieces of data into this clone. So you can ask me any question. Hey, and here's the first one to ask. When you, when you get to my clone, just say, hey, my YOS is Better Way, Challenge Simplify. What does that mean? And then I will break it all down for you. And then you can say, hey, I'm thinking about, here's my company. Here's my messaging. Is this in alignment with it? So you can just ask me all kinds of really interesting questions that you might have on how to use your why, how, and what in your business. And you could also do it as a couple. You could go there with your significant other, like Candice was talking about, and say, my YOS is this. What does it mean? My husband's YOS is this. What does it mean? Now, what are some challenges that we might have? What are ways we'd get along well? And all that kind of stuff.

I asked it, how do I convince him I need a little baby Highland cow? Like a mini Heilong Tao, very helpful.

How do I talk? Yeah, that I could see that being really a good, good use of it.

Yes.

Angela just put up, Angela just put up the link for the Delphi AI. If you just also Google Delphi Dr. Gary Sanchez, you'll find it that way because half the time I have to be able to find next. I'm not doing it there. Gary, where are you next? Where's, what's the next location you head off to?

I will be in Austin. I've been working, so this is something in alignment with, with your group here. I've been working with these different billionaire groups and called R360, and they're all founders of pretty amazing companies. And so I just worked with the one in Dallas, and then we're doing the Austin in a couple of weeks, and then some in Florida and around the country. But it's really fascinating. Here's the— there's a podcast out there called Founders, right? And it's a really good podcast. And there's a theme that I've seen. I've probably listened to 40 episodes, and there's a theme that all of the founders, these are people like Michael Dell or Jim Mackey, who with Whole Foods, the, the theme that I've noticed with them is how they have found success is 2 things. They all talk about this. Number 1 is perseverance. Number 1 is perseverance, right? They've been told you shouldn't do this. You can't do this. It's not gonna work. All the rest. They say, you know, give them the middle finger and they keep going. And the second thing they all talk about is the search for self. I didn't know who I was. I did all of this and now I'm, if I can just align my business with who I am, I will be so much more effective. And that's what they were all searching for. You'll hear it over and over and over. Michael Dell said that exact thing. I was doing a lot of stuff, but it wasn't in alignment with me. Now I'm just doing the things that are in alignment with me. And that's when we really had that ramp up. And so in your own world, if you're a founder, perseverance is gonna be the key. Understanding yourself is gonna be the key.

Yeah. I would agree. Well, Dr. Gary Sanchez, thank you so much for joining us. I value our friendship so much and to have you as our guest on my birthday was awesome. And Candice and Jackie, I just love being around you guys. By the way, Jackie and Candice have a show and it's called WTF, Women Talk Finance. And they talk finance, but they also talk about all sorts of really cool other things. So, you don't have to just tune in and it's not just for women. It's a super cool experience. We're always finding amazing women guests guests that have done incredible things out there. However, once in a while they even bring in, um, or at least I'm told I'm going to be a guest on their show one day down the way. Uh, Jay, thank you for all the birthday wishes, we appreciate it. And to my team, Angela and Kelly and Kirsten and, and Katie, thank you so much for, uh, getting this put together today. Uh, again, Gary Sanchez, go out there. By the way, I'm in Houston on Saturday giving a keynote to mergers and acquisitions. Uh, so that is here. We, we had Casey on who was the president of our oil and gas company ages ago. This is his venture now. Um, I think you still get a discount if you sign up for it. Uh, a day of talking to people who have, um, or are buying businesses that have already proven cash flows. And we're going to be talking about how do you raise capital for buying those businesses. So it's, you know, there's a lot of structured finance out there, but that oftentimes it's the other pieces in there. And then how do you get the story very right for exiting those if that's what you're going to be doing. So, we appreciate that. Gary, there's so many tools, so many things I've learned from you. And once again, just even thanks for giving me that 30 pounds of lessness of me as we go into this year. I never thought I would have that, right? So, coming into 60 years old, it's like I looked at our picture from our Tahoe event, I'm like, "Who is that guy?" And I'm reasonably athletic, so everybody's like, "No, you're in good shape." And I'm like, "Yeah, but I'm in a shape that's getting rounder all the time." So, It was very much appreciated. So thanks everyone. Let's have a great week. I'm going to go out there. I'm in Sedona, loving the energy here. And, huh, go out and hike. It is exactly, exactly. Well, thank you. Have a great day. Take care.

So much, Gary.

Happy birthday.

Bye.

Thanks, Gary.