Attitude Awareness Month - Day 13 Attitude of Empathy

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Hello, Hello Attitude Nation. It is Glenn bill on day 12 of attitude awareness Month. So good to be with you all. I hope you all had a great weekend. I wonder how many of you watched the Masters? How many of you watched our message yesterday regarding the attitude of champions, especially champion golfers? And wasn't it interesting to look at what the best golfers do and how that guy Matsuyoma finished as a winner and the guy right under him packed it in and fell off the deep end? The poor guy. I felt bad for him. But certainly as we watch that those attitude lessons can be understood and be followed. Today is a great day. April 12th. April 12th is the day that my father left the earth. My dad, his name was Joe Bill. Many of you know him who watched this. It was five years ago today. And I'm sure those of you who sit and watch this, who have lost loved ones, I'm sure those days go by a lot faster than you think. The thought of my father passing five years ago seems very, very. It's crazy. It just seems like it was yesterday. And I happened to run into a good friend of mine whose father passed nine years ago. And so many of us, you know, think that it's going to be forever. It's going to take forever, it's unbearable. But boy, the next thing you know, you sit there and you go, my God, it's been five years, 10 years, 20 years, some of you, 30 years since the passing of your parents. So I just wanted to do this attitude. I guess it's not a podcast, this Attitude daily chat to honor my father and mother who were on the picture of our thumbnail, but to honor your parents or to honor those who have passed away in your life who you've loved. I'd love for you to type their names into our chat and to just honor them so we can all take a look and see what's going on. I want to say hello to my dear producer, my dear friend, Jason Aaron. Jason Aaron, thank you for signing in and being with us today. Jason manages the Get Attitude podcast. If you're a podcaster, you need a studio, you need a producer. Or you need video production done. Jason. There's just nobody better than Jason at all. So what I want to do is just address a couple different strategies and a couple different thoughts regarding grief and losing folks, not to bring everybody down. And then we're going to end on a real up note on something sent to me by coach Tom Dilley, the head football coach here in Indiana. He found some notes that my father had given him regarding coaching young children. And I thought I'd share those with you as well. So the first thing I want to just talk to is just give you three different ideas on death and coping with death and grief. And I thought they were pretty helpful. Number one was don't put time limits on your grief. If you have in fact lost someone, understand that grief is probably going to go on forever and that it's okay if it continues to do it. Grief is about learning to accept and manage what you are going through. It's about managing your sadness, managing your loss. And understand that you don't have to eliminate how you're feeling about the person that you lost. I do want to recommend that you go to the Gap, the unbelievable Susan Van Hoosen. If you google her or go to YouTube, she has a book called One Bite at a Time about her grief story, how she lost her incredibly cool husband and what she did to come back. One bite at a time. It's absolutely fantastic. The second thing about death and dying and loss is resist comparing your grief to other people's. Now we talk about all the time. Stop comparing yourself to other people. Just understand that grief is complex and the complexity does not lend itself to superficial comparisons. When you're dealing with loss and things of this nature, the bottom line is this. Everybody grieves differently. Nobody's right, nobody's wrong. And if you've lost somebody, I just hope those two quick little things maybe help you. And now I want to go to this positive stuff because my father, as some of you know or may not know, is coached in six different decades of youth football. And I'm talking 34 to 56 grade kids mostly. And coach Tom Dilley sent me this thing and it was coaching kids to love football. How fun is that? Very first line was the bottom line. It's all about the players. It's not about me. There's going to be several leadership lessons in this post and if you are a leader, make sure that you understand it is about your players, it's not about you. As a matter of fact, the more we can create that humility Factor that some of the greatest leaders, Steve Jacobson being one of them, who is also on our podcast. I just typed him in. You know, it's never about him, it's all about the team. And this speech was given on March 19, 2011, interestingly enough, and it says the main goal, the Roman numeral one on this says to motivate the players to win the personal struggle of doing their best. Right? Do you struggle with doing your best? I mean we all do, don't we? And so he has some keys on how to do that. Going beyond your current limits and preparing for the physical and mental tasks necessary to compete successfully. One of the greatest things that we discussed on why he coached, he felt, and I think a lot of you guys feel the same way if you are coaches. We don't coach for the trophies, we don't coach for the uniforms and the swag. But we coach to help, especially young kids compete. The art of competition, the love of competition, the embracing of competition in today's world is damn near non existent. And one of his passions was to take young people and show them the way that you know what, there is nothing better than competition and to, you know, embrace it. So here's a couple key things. Number one, we are family, parents, coaches and players. Whoever you're leading, I think it's important that you guys consider them family and understand the importance of having a close knit group. Treat all players fairly. I think is very, you know, just give yourself a score on 1 to 10. How fairly do you treat the people that are supporting you? Create a definition of a great teammate. Maybe we'll get into these later, but do you have a definition for a teammate? I love this. He loves this. All for one, one for all is all for one and is one for all on the team that you're running. Focus on effort, not the players action. You know, sometimes our players don't know what they're doing. They're doing the wrong things, sometimes our employees are doing the wrong things. But it's effort is what we should really be focusing on. And one of the last things that he stated was no tolerance for criticism of fellow teammates. If you're leading an organization or if you're part of an organization that allows your peers to backbite, to criticize, to dump on your fellow teammates, Trust me, not a great way to build rapport. Realistic and personal team goals. Very, very important. Just review this, right? Tell them what to do, not what to not do, right? So many times when we criticize or we talk to people that we're leading. We say, don't do this. We really need to talk to people about what they should do, not what they shouldn't do. Makes for much more positive and honestly, a much more productive way to coach. And then obviously let them know that you have their best interests at heart, that you want them to succeed. And if you can convince them that that is true, they will go to battle for you. So I thought those were fun. Celebrating Joseph G. Bill Jr. S death date. My name is Glenn Bill, with the University of Attitude helping you understand that you cannot win in life, you cannot win in business, and you cannot win in your relationships unless you win in your mind first. I hope you enjoyed those little tips from Coach Joe. And I hope that if your parents are living, you give them a hug, you write them a note, and you make sure that you let them know how important they are to you. Because sooner or later, they ain't going to be here. All right, you guys have a great one. Take care. From the University of Attitude. This podcast is a part of the C Suite Radio Network. For more top business podcasts, visit c suiteradio.com.