Bridging The Gap From Humble To Humanity With Mitzi Perdue
31 Mar 2021 · 54 min
Mitzi Perdue, daughter of Sheraton's founder and widow of Frank Perdue, discusses her book How to Be Up in Down Times and lessons from her family's business legacy. She covers 40 short chapters on attitude, her anti-human-trafficking work, and what she learned across seven decades.
Chapters
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Probably one of my favorite interviews that we have ever done. Mitzi, you are spectacular. Thank you so much for being on the Get Attitude podcast. You guys make sure you subscribe, rate, review, share and do not miss Mitzi. She's gonna knock your socks off. What is the roadmap to defeat self sabotage, negative thinking and learned helplessness in these unprecedented times? You must get connected, growing, Get Certain and Get Attitude. The Get Attitude Podcast. Today we have the unbelievable Mitzi Perdue who is with us. You might know Mitzi or you might not know Mitzi. She is the daughter of one family business titan. Her dad, her father was the founder of the Sheraton hotel chain. She is also the widow widow of another titan. Her late husband was the family business poultry magnate Frank Perdue. She is also a businesswoman in her own right. She started the family wine and grape business, now one of the larger suppliers of wine grapes in California. Mitzi is an author, she is a speaker, she is a professional podcast guest. Mitzi, do you have a podcast by the way?
No, I actually would prefer to be a guest because I think you do all the work. I just have fun and talk.
Love it. And Mitzi has just come out with a book that she co authored with Mark Victor Hanson called How to Be up and Down Times. And if there's anything about attitude that we need to know is how do we stay up when everybody is so down and so negative. Mitzi Perdue, welcome to the Get Attitude Podcast.
Well, it's sheer joy being here and you know, for a good bit of my adult life, I've believed in the idea. I think it's a Buddhist idea. Attitude is everything.
Yes, absolutely right. Oh, there's no doubt about it. I want to just hit real quick on your book, how to Be up and Down Times. Give us one or two nuggets from that book. How do you help people? Or what is your advice on staying up and down times? Maybe what's the general idea of that book that people can take with us after this interview and go, aha. I got the secret from Mitzi today.
Okay. It's organized in 40 chapters, each of which is two pages long. And the idea when Mark Victor Hanson, the chicken soup for the soul guy.
Yes.
When he and I, and then also his son who's just a world class expert on physical fitness. We were writing this book, we thought nobody wants to read a 360 page tome. They want quick advice. Yes, that's what we provide. And I will give you like one.
Okay, you can give me one. Give me your favorite one and if you want, give me two.
All right. Secret to happiness. Wouldn't you like the secret to happiness?
I think we all want the secret to happiness. Mitzi, tell me the secret.
I'm going to deliver.
I love it.
And it comes from Plato. It comes from 2,300 years ago. Plato's students in ancient Athens asked him, what does it take to be happy? And Plato answered, there are three things that men think will make them happy. Power, money and fame. He said the problem with those is long time, they never make you happy. They don't make you happy, he said, because people always want more. You've got some money, you want more, you've got power, you've got fame. He didn't say this, but it's kind of like a street drug. Power, money and fame. You just always want a bigger and bigger dose. So Plato's students asked him what does make people happy? And Plato answered, truth, beauty, goodness. And the reason that truth, beauty and goodness can make you happy is because each dose of it all by itself can make you happy. But on the other hand, it's unlike money, power and fame, which don't satisfy you long term. Have we got time for me to illustrate that in a life that I think is just really pretty interesting or two lives?
Absolutely. I just love truth, beauty and goodness. I mean, here's the thing, we could stop the podcast and I think we've smashed it already, but please, now I'm.
Going to drive it home. This is going to be a basis loaded home run.
Okay, that is good. I'm guessing that the two people we're going to talk about would be your father and your late husband. Is that.
Well, actually they carried out what I'm about to describe. But since people don't know my late husband, or maybe they do, they certainly don't know my late father because he was born in 1897. I don't think there are many people alive today who would know him. But I wanted to share a story and this is what I just told you is out of how to be up and down times. Yes, there's an illustration of the story that I cherish, and it has to do with Napoleon Bonaparte, Emperor of France, and Mother Teresa.
Wow.
Napoleon Bonaparte had all the power, money, fame, riches. I mean, he owned, like, three quarters of the territory of all of Europe. He had palaces, all the status symbols. You can think of all the women, basically, all the worldly goodies that life has to offer. Take in contrast Mother Teresa as a nun. Her particular order allowed her to only have the following possessions. Nothing more than this. Three cotton saris, which, incidentally, were made by lepers, and the sandals on her feet. She lived among the Bengali women who were the poorest of the poor. Now we have a contrast. Somebody who has all the money, payment, power, money, fame, and power that this earthly life has to offer. There aren't many people who had it on the scale that Napoleon did or Mother Teresa. Almost no earthly possessions and lives among lepers. Okay, who was happier? Did the money, power, and fame make Napoleon happy? Well, we don't have to guess, because he wrote when he was in exile, at the end of his days, he was in an island in the South Atlantic, and he said, I cannot count six happy days in my whole life.
Wow. How about that?
All right, now take this as a contrast. Mother Teresa. And we don't have to guess about her either, because she wrote, my life has been a feast of unending joy.
Yes, yes.
So truth, beauty, and goodness made her happy. A feast of unending joy. And Napoleon, who couldn't count six happy days.
That's a beautiful story. We on the Get Attitude podcast have interviewed a gentleman by the name of Dr. Chuck Dietzen. Dr. Chuck is a global healer. Dr. Chuck spent three weeks with mother Teresa, serving her in Calcutta.
Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. Oh, my gosh. What I'd give to have had that experience.
Yeah, it was a pretty powerful podcast. So what you need to do is make sure you subscribe, Mitzi. You go back and you find that Dr. Chuck Dietzen interview, and he talks about his time with Mother and the lessons that she taught him. And it's just an overpowering, beautiful, beautiful podcast, and I think you'll love it. But your story is so appropriate and fantastic, and I think if we all focused on those.
That was episode number three, by the way.
Episode number three. Three is, of course, our lucky number. If you know us Christians out there, three is a big deal, right? The Trinity, all of that. How funny that you said that. Thank you, Jason. So, hey, check that one out, Mitzi. I think you'll like that.
I certainly will.
I certainly Will, what a beautiful way to open up our podcast. And I think anytime we can bring Mother Teresa in my podcast, that's a good thing. So you did wonderfully. Let's talk about, if we can, that. That unbelievable father of yours. Right. I didn't know him, but certainly I know the Sheraton Hotels. I've spoken at Sheraton Hotels all over America. And I'd love to know the attitude lesson that your father left you, maybe on a personal level, and then the attitude lesson that you witnessed as a businesswoman or growing up. And I'm not sure, hopefully he got to be with you as you were older and didn't die young. You can tell us that story. But what was, as a person, his attitude lesson for you as a dad, and then an attitude lesson as a titan in business. Could you talk to us about both of those?
I'd like nothing more. Well, one thing that impressed me no end is I remember as a little girl walking into. He had an office in his home as well as an office in an office building. So Saturday I walk in and there he is with all these books. And how about ledgers? I mean, they're like, they didn't have Excel spreadsheets back then, but the equivalent of that. And he's just deep into it. And I asked him what he's doing, and he said that he was forming a foundation that would enable him to give away ever more money. And I asked him, well, why is that so important to you? And he told me, the greatest pleasure my wealth ever gave me is in giving it away.
Wow, that is cool.
But there's more to it than that, because, you know, for changing attitude and for being all that you can be. What a story he had. And I'll share it with you briefly, please. When he was 26 years old, he'd just gotten engaged to my mother. And I mean, this is a little piece of family lore in my birth family.
Wonderful.
Mother came from West Virginia. She's a southern belle, and she's all in love. And she's just gotten engaged to my father, and she meets her future mother in law for the first time. Grandmother Berta. Grandmother Berta told mother, don't marry Ernest. He can never stick to anything. You'll end up poor.
Oh, my gosh.
How's that for sort of a wake up call? Well, mother's answer was, I don't care. I love him. You know, love is blind.
Love is blind.
And she didn't end up poor. However, this was an extreme wake up call for father if his own mother is saying he can never stick to anything and he's going to end up poor. So he did something about it. He went to the Johnson o' Connor career guidance counselor. And this is back, I think we're talking like 1923.
Sure.
In 1923, Johnson O', Connor, the career guidance counselor that he had gotten out of whatever was like the yellow Pages back then, spent a whole eight hours with him giving him every test that you can think of. This was to try to find out why Ernest could never stick to anything, why he just wasn't good at holding a job. Johnson o' Connor told him, you have the worst human relations skills I've ever come across. He said, you're clearly a bright fellow and you've got a science background because you studied engineering at mit. I think that you could make a career in a laboratory where you didn't have to interact with anybody else, but you could use all those smarts that you've got. But don't ever try for anything outside of being alone in a laboratory.
Wow.
Well, father took this as a challenge and again he told me about this. He reasoned that you're never going to get anywhere in life if you don't know how to get along with people. That getting along with people, as he told me, is the key to everything. I mean, it's just like the number one important skill. And now that he had identified what he was terrible at, he spent the rest of his life learning what makes people tick. He read psychology books, he. Took the Dale Carnegie course, he took salesmanship courses, he took public speaking courses. It was a lifelong quest to try to understand what makes people tick. And later on in life, when he was more successful, he didn't give up. Some of the world's most famous psychologists of the time were weekend guests in our home because Eddie Bernays, I think he's the father of modern advertising. Great psychologist, B.F. skinner, Behavioral Psychology, I mean just a whole lot of really famous people because for the rest of his life he wanted to learn what makes people tick. And I think he mastered it because if you're in the hotel industry, I used to think that father, he had 400 hotels at the time of his death. Wow. I used to guess that there would be few people other than national politicians who didn't interact with people more than this genial host of the Sheraton Hotels.
So he was a real hands on owner and he would go to each one of those hotels and kibits with the.
Allow me to share another story about him then, yeah, this is something that he told me. The Charton hotels got its start in the 1930s, and that was a time when hotels were just going bankrupt right and left. I mean, everybody was running away from real estate, and in particular, they were running away from hotels. And clearly they had reason to run away from them, because at the height of the Great Depression, with 25% unemployment, the occupancy rate was how about approaching zero? So these properties were going bankrupt. So how could father make a success out of an industry that was just falling apart and crashing? And this, by the way, is something of a lesson for today, but I'll continue with the story. How did he make a success when everybody else was failing? And I think it boils down 100% to the fact that by the 1930s, he probably knew more about human relations and how to get along with people and what makes them tip than any of his competitors. He said whenever he'd take over, whenever he'd take possession of a new hotel, whenever he had bought a new hotel, he told me that the day he took possession, he'd invite all the employees, and there might be 400, there might be 800. He'd invite all of them into the ballroom. And he knew that every one of them was just demoralized and probably scared, because back then, if you lost your job when there's 25% unemployment, you're not going to get another. So imagine you're walking in the ballroom and there's the new owner, and you're probably terrified that he's going to clean house and bring in his own friends and his cousins and his uncles.
Yes, okay.
Father knew that nobody was going to listen to a word he said until he addressed their pain, their fear. So the first words out of his mouth in every case was always, I want every one of you to keep your job, and I want you to keep your job, because I know that you know your work better than anybody else in the world. And it's my job to give you the resources and the encouragement to show the world just how good you are.
Wow.
Isn't that cool? But even that's not the end of the story. He told me those are just words, and, you know, they really sound good. And he had more to say. He said he told the people in the bar room, he said, you'll see, in a couple of months, this is all gonna turn around. This is gonna be the most popular, the best served, the most financially stable hotel in the city. And together as a team, we're gonna show the rest of the city that things can turn around.
I love it.
But that's not the end of the story. Will you allow me to go on?
Yes.
Good. Thank you. I think it's bad manners to monologue. So that's why I asked.
It's good manners on my podcast, especially with this good. Understand how the Sheridan Hotel chain was found by the attitude. I mean, I think what, you know, it gets back to. He took the definition that was given to him as somebody with no personal skills as a challenge. And that is what's ringing through to me every. Yeah, it's a part. Or these hotels are going bankrupt. That's the definition. He said no, that's the challenge. And here's the answer. So please continue.
Thank you. Thank you very much. Because I really don't want to be a bad mannered guest, but I'll continue with the story. He said, first of all, people have a compulsion to live up to or down to your expectations. So he's kind of setting the table that we're going to accomplish great things. But those are just words. But the next day, the employees there would see just armies of people coming in, like electricians, decorators, plumbers. And the important part is they didn't go to the areas that the paying public would see. Now they're going to the areas they're refurbishing and sprucing up the areas that only the employees would see, like the employee dining room, the employee lockers, showers, you know, the areas where the employees only would be enjoying and being impressed by that. And so, you know, as a little girl, I'm asking, father, why would you spend money where you're not going to get any money back from it? And he said, a leader's job is to give people a better vision of themselves.
Yes.
And by showing how important they were to him, that he'd spend the first money on them. I think that was the secret of Sheraton's success. I mean, because not only did he have a great attitude, he was instilling in the people who worked with him an attitude that they're winners, that they're part of a team that's making this the best hotel in the city.
And that's part of attitude booster number 10. Be a part of something bigger than you. And that's really what he was doing. That's so wonderful. Now, his name was Ernest. What was his middle and last name?
Ernest Flagg. Henderson.
And Flagg had to have been a family name, I'm guessing.
Yes, absolutely.
And what was Your beautiful mother's name.
From West Virginia, Mary Stevens and eventually Henderson.
Okay.
And I'm named after her because although you call me Mitzi, my legal name is Mary, and I love being Mitzi, so I don't want anybody to adjust.
Well, I have a granddaughter named Mary, and I love her quite a bit. And my mother's middle name was Marilyn, so we're all good. So this begs the question, why wasn't it called Henderson Hotels instead of how did the name Sheraton come about?
Okay. And this. Actually, it's an attitude thing.
I love it.
Well, the third hotel that father ever bought, it was in Springfield, Massachusetts, and it had a $10,000 neon sign, which was just the height of being modern back then.
Yeah, a lot of money back then.
I mean, I bet it would be like $200,000 in today's money. I mean, I'm guessing. I don't know. But $10,000 at the height of the Great Depression was a lot of money. And my father was a good New England Yankee. He had the attitude that you just don't waste. And he couldn't bear the idea of tearing down a $10,000 sign. But for advertising purposes, you'd like, by then, he had three hotels, and it's easier to advertise under the same name. And so here was his thought process and even told me, he said that he thought Sheraton had a ring to it. He thought Henderson did not have a ring to it.
Yes, yes.
Which I just thought was an attitude of humility that I cherish. So to avoid being wasteful and to have a name that sounded good, Sheraton got its name with that third hotel. And from then on, Sheraton.
And so. But was Sheraton on the sign, or was it a name that he invented? Or did he.
No, the $10,000 neon sign said Sheraton did it really? Yeah. And that's what he wouldn't. Was unwilling to tear down because it would just be so wasteful to tear down a perfectly good sign. So that is how Sheraton got its name.
And, you know, in keeping with the current times, you know, being a woman and supporting a man in his job. My wife and I were just talking, and I forget what. What we were talking about, but I. Oh. She said, why in the world do women take men's last name? And I said, well, probably because men used to be the providers, and it was easier for them to keep their name to continue to provide. So talk to me just real quick. When it comes to the beautiful Mary Stevens, what was her attitude lesson? What was life like for her? And maybe what was the one lesson she taught you about attitude?
Well, since I've already explained that Father innately and inherently wasn't born with human relations skills.
Oh, my gosh.
Right. I mean, the worst that a career guidance counselor had ever seen. But I would say it was an extreme case of opposites attract, because Mother, as a Southern belle, was just the most warm, understanding, embracing person that you've ever come across.
Oh, that's cool.
Had such just inherent insight into what made people tick. And so I thought, you know, although father eventually got very good at it, it was never. Didn't come natural at all.
Sure. So she was a real connector, I.
Thought her warmth and his sort of intellectual distance ness, it was just made in heaven. I mean, I think they each cherished what the other had to offer.
That is such a cool story. And then what was their love story? Did they meet at college or did they. How did they meet?
Well, she being from West Virginia, she had a cousin in Cambridge, Massachusetts, and there was a dance in Cambridge, and I think she was like, she might have been 22 or something. And they did fall in love and agreed to marry. But when they actually did get married, the wedding was in Wheeling, West Virginia. At that time, you got from West Virginia back to Cambridge, Massachusetts, by train. And I think it was some kind of overnight thing.
Yes.
I have her diary.
Oh, my mercy. That's gotta be priceless.
Oh, coolest thing in the world. Because she's getting cold feet. She's writing in her diary. What have I gotten into? I love Ernie, but I'm going to a place where the people are cold, the climate is cold, and my children are going to grow up Yankees.
Oh, my gosh, how wonderful. You know, the bottom line is, the realness of that is. You know what? There's probably a lot of women out there that felt the same way as they were going to do what they were doing. Let's shift from that love affair to quite possibly the next titan in your life. The next man in your life who I'm sure you supported and helped and molded. And I'd love to know about Frank Perdue and how you two met and what it was like being married to the chicken titan of America.
Well, first of all, it was heaven. He was my hero from beginning to end. And we had a somewhat odd courtship because I was living in California. I'd spent a week in Washington, D.C. working on the campaign of a presidential candidate who washed up. But it Turns out that he was a supporter of that candidate. And there was an event kind of celebrating his washing up in the. In the primaries.
Who was the candidate? I gotta know.
It was Bob Dole. And we're talking 1988.
Wow. Interesting. Okay.
Okay. So there's this party given by Bob Dole. I mean, he had. He had lost the primaries and was out of the game. But. But he did have a party. And I had to leave early and Frank Perdue arrived late. So we only had 10 minutes of overlap. And the first five minutes, we were both single. At that point, we were both divorced. And the first five minutes were spent talking about how we would never consider the possibility of the notion of the concept of marrying again because we had been so unhappy in our previous marriages. Right. And then somewhere around five minutes into it, we started agreeing that this was unfortunate because it meant growing old alone, but that was our fate because we'd never trust anybody again.
Wow.
And then I looked up at him and he said, I believe I could trust you. And I answered, I believe I could trust you. And then we spent the next four minutes talking about what our marriage would be like. And when we did marry and we'd known each other in person six weeks and three days.
Oh, my. Isn't that beautiful, though? See, I think, you know, when you know, I don't think it takes a lot of time. That's just me. And obviously you probably agree with me. So how long?
Well, actually, it's been an endless puzzle to me how we could both commit after knowing each other five minutes.
I know.
By the way, when he gave me my engagement ring, I'd known him five hours.
Wow. That is incredible.
And a favorite moment in life was our church has a six weeks prenuptial counseling period. I mean, they just won't let you get married faster than that. Which is why I said it was six weeks and three days. Well, we went to call on the minister who married us, Reverend Drazel. And I mean, the third time I saw Frank in my life was in the rectory of Reverend Drazel's church.
Oh, my.
And Reverend Drazel said, you know, I'm so happy for you. Marriage is a wonderful institution. How long have you known each other? And I said, do you mean in person? He said, well, yes. And so I looked at my watch And I said, 36 hours.
Isn't that. Well, I think the message is that although it's an anomaly if you're out there, ladies, and maybe you've gone through a marital reversal or A relationship reversal. Mitzi's story always provides hope. Because you know what? I believe there's always a chance. I always believe in love. And I believe that God sends us people that he knows more than us. And the fact that you were walking out and he was walking in and you took those 10 minutes. So what happened after the 10 minutes? Did you say, call me later? Did you wait outside? What went on there? Or did you say, I'm not leaving now? Did you turn around and go back in? What was going on?
I was president of American Agriwomen, which Today is a 40,000 member organization. And I had a speaking tour visiting the different chapters of American Agriwomen. And I had a plane to catch, so it wasn't a case. I didn't get back home to California for 10 days. So we didn't speak for 10 days. But when I got home, there were all these nice. While you were out messages, and they were from Frank. And when we did speak, he said, I want you to know I've never been more serious in my life. Wow, me too. But by the way, that's so cool.
That's just so beautiful.
Since in our audience there are people who may be going through horrible divorces or separations or infidelities or all sorts of ghastly things, I think I'm living proof that things can turn around in a dime. I mean, from one day to the next, I went from misery to joy.
Yeah. Amazing. And how long were you and Frank together?
He passed away after 17 years of marriage. But the 17 years were just bliss. And I felt that I'd known him forever. And what made the marriage great, from my point of view was he was a totally good person.
Yeah, that's cool. And then was he building his chicken empire during these 17 years, or had he already made it and was on his way weaning out so he could just enjoy you?
No. Here's what happened. I mentioned that our courtship was a little bit odd. He told me, I'm running a business. This happens to be a somewhat difficult time. It's not going to be a normal courtship. It's not even. I'm not going to be chasing you around or flowers or all the rest. A lot of our six weeks was me accompanying him to business meetings.
I'll be doggone w. Loved it.
I just loved it, loved it, loved it. But no, he was very definitely continuing to run the company. It wasn't until in his 80s he began really pulling back. But I loved being part of his world. I Mean, I loved the people I interacted with. I loved the mission. Like, I'll tell you something about Purdue Farms. We are the largest producer of organic chicken in the world. We have no antibiotics, a lot of the chickens, and every month we're increasing what I'm about to describe, but they're pasture raised. Is that not cool?
Amazing. Yeah. When you talked about the mission, what was the mission? You said you loved the mission of Purdue Farms.
It's a several part mission, but it's providing quality food at an affordable price while providing tens of thousands of people with good jobs.
I love it. I love it. And then as far as his leadership style or his attitude, can you just maybe try to give us a feel for who he was, what his attitude was and how he was as a leader?
Well, one of the things that I'm really proud of, and it comes from my background in the hospitality industry. When we were first married, remember, we didn't know each other all that well. We had just come back from our honeymoon and we're walking on a beach Watch Hill, Rhode island, and we're carrying our sandals and it's sort of fall weather. It's the end of August, but New England kind of fall weather. And yeah, it's romantic. But suddenly I look up at him and I say, frank, I think we should entertain every single person who works for the company. Oh, well. He said, mitzi, you realize, and at this point, the figure I'm about to give you is right for 1988, you realize there's 16,000 people. You know that's not a practical idea, right? And I pretended that I wasn't really processing that he was saying no. And I said, I think we should have them 100 at a time. You say, no, that's way too many. And I said, I bet we could put it together in six weeks and start then. No, that's way too soon. But as we continued talking about it, he was changing his mind gradually. From what planet did she set down from? To maybe there's something to it, till finally, I like it. And six weeks later, we did start. And throughout our marriage, usually like three times a month, would have groups of people 100 or more over for dinner in our house. And it would be like the truckers, the accountants, the veterinarians, the IT people, just everyone in groups of 100. And what was, to me, like, uniquely special about this is in the living room of our home, we set up this great long buffet table and Frank Perdue would wait on his employees. I mean, he'd stand behind the buffet table and serve them.
Mitzi, you are freaking amazing. Jason, are you loving this?
Loving it.
I'm loving it. I mean, that is so cool. 16,100 at a time. Absolutely unbelievable. Mitzi, you're so captivating and enamoring to me. It's so wonderful. Thank you so much for sharing your stories. Now we close every podcast with a little game, and so you're going to play a game with me. Is that okay?
I'm up for it.
Because we want. We call this the attitude through the decades game. And what I'm going to do is take you through your life. Now, you don't have to tell me how old you are, but you don't seem like the type of lady that does.
I'm 79, and I'm as proud of it as can be.
That a girl. I knew you were going to be happy, so me and you are going to have fun. So what we're going to do, I'm going to walk you through your life from the day you were born to when you were 10, 20, 30, 40. And you can tell me what was going on in your life and what the attitude lesson is. So as we walk through your life, Mitzi, our listeners, our gappers, is what we call them, can walk through their life. And quite possibly, the lessons that you've Learned over your 79 beautiful years will inspire, will enrich, and will encourage our gappers. Now, I know that you may not remember being born, but when you think about an attitude lesson of birth, and certainly you've probably seen a lot of chickens be born or whatever, what do you think the attitude lesson of birth is?
Well, let's see. Mother had me at age 41, and I was always curious if I was an accident. She said the most reassuring thing. She said, no, we prayed to have you.
I love it. I love it.
So I felt wanted, which is a really neat thing for a kid to feel, Right?
So feeling wanted is a great. It isn't a weakness. Actually, when we look at attitude, feeling wanted is actually a strength, a strength that can be used, but very affirming. Yeah, and very affirming. So that's beautiful. We haven't had that answer. I have a feeling you're going to go like 7 for 7 on stuff we've never heard.
I'm gonna try.
All right, so now I want you to talk to us about when you were 10 years old. That would put you in around third or fourth grade. Would love to know where you were in the world at 10 years old. If you remember your third or fourth grade teacher, what was the attitude lesson you think you learned in third or fourth grade when you were 10 years old?
Mother, there are five siblings. Mother was very big on teaching us from an age in which we could comprehend it that to have a good life you need to put back in the bucket, that you're going to be happier, you're going to be better off if you give more than you take. She used to say the givers of the world are happy, the takers of the world are miserable. And taken. The sense of, how to put it, I mean, I'm fine with in some sense, but now I'm trying to translate what she meant by the takers of the world are, I guess whatever the opposite of giver is.
Right. Well, they're people that ain't given and they're just flat out taking. I do want him. And so from a very early age it was put in your soul that I need to be a giver, I need to make things better, I need to increase others. And I do want to just acknowledge your beautiful work with human trafficking. And if you wouldn't mind, give us a little taste of what you've been doing, what you've been up to. If there's a website people can go to to help with your mission, we'd just love to get a little lesson on that that was quite possibly inspired in you as a 10 year old.
Oh, without question. I mean mother felt, and father did too that we're here to help others, we're not just here to be takers. But for human trafficking, I think it's the worst scourge that exists in the world because there are 40 million people according to the United nations who are being trafficked. And if you're being trafficked, you never have a good day. And if you're being sex trafficked. I talked with a psychiatrist who treats people who have been sex trafficked and he said, think of the most depressed you've ever been in your life. Maybe your mother died, whatever. That, that person who's being sex trafficked is feeling that every hour of every day for years at a time. So when I heard that like a 12 year old little girl may be forced to have sex with strangers 10 or 12 times a night, 365 days a year, I thought this is so terrible, I can't unsee this image and I've got to do something about it and I'm not going to be able to solve it myself, but I can sure give whatever I can to do something about it.
And is there an organization that you work with, Mitzi, or that you started to help with this issue?
Yeah, it's called winthisfight.org and I have a way of helping people. Remember winthisfight.org tell us. Think of the initials of it and I'll make it easy for you. It's wtf. But that is absolutely no accident because that's my attitude towards trafficking. It's wtf or in this fight. But the name actually came from neuroscientists who told me that my original name for it, Anti Trafficking Auction, said, that sucks. There's no call to action. That's not memorable. But when this fight with its initials, that's memorable.
Yeah. That is so powerful. Mitzi, that's great. Thank you for sharing with us. And we have it up here and we'll obviously be promoting that when we promote your podcast. Let's go. From the young girl at 10. Now you become a young woman and you're 20 years old. Where were you at 20? I think I read that you went to Harvard, if that's correct. Were you at Harvard at the time?
I was an undergraduate and I started out at Radcliffe, but my year they switched. Radcliffe became absorbed by Harvard. So I graduated in 63. And I loved Harvard as an undergraduate. It was as exciting and wonderful as anything could be.
And what was the attitude lesson you learned at 20?
Okay. It's one that I don't still hold.
That's okay.
But at age 20, I did everything. And in my 20s, I did everything I could to kind of hide my background. I wanted to be accepted as me. I didn't want to take advantage of my father's name or money. I became a management intern at the Treasury Department for my first job. And I did everything I could to have my colleagues not realize that I was filthy stinking rich.
Right. And I think we have a lot of influencers and innovators that listen to this and that are with us in season two who I think feel the same thing. Even though you may have incredible self worth financially, you may not have independent self worth inside. So I think that that's probably refreshing. There's people that are from families that are extremely successful. There's a lot of pressure that comes with that. But to be able to acknowledge, hey, I want to be me for who I am and not, I think that's beautiful. And obviously you're embracing where you're from now, which might be a little bit easier. Did you face any personal problems during the 20s, I think you had mentioned before this that you had overcome some challenges that you might wanted to share with our audience.
Can we fast Forward to the 30s then?
Okay, well, good. So let's get to 30. Great attitude lesson for 20. Now you're 30. What's the attitude lesson of 30? And let's tell that story.
In my 30s, I really wasn't doing much with my education or my background or anything. And there was a reason which was as I got older, I got more and more shy. And the reason I got more and more shy was actually had a pretty severe speech impediment. I had a lisp that was bad enough so that not only do you hear it, but you could see it. You put your tongue in the wrong place when you've got a really severe lisp. And over the course of my life, but somehow became more sensitive to it in my 30s, people would tell me when they got to know me better that when they first met me, they thought that I was stupid. And that sort of built on itself where I'm meeting somebody and I'm knowing that they think I'm stupid. So I got into a career change, which was I became a rice grower in Northern California. Because if you're growing rice, guess what? You don't have to interact with loads and loads of people. Sure. But somewhere. Tell me how long I have to tell this story. Because I can tell it quite briefly or I can tell it.
Yeah, give us, give us the brief version. We got nine minutes to get you through the rest of your life. So you can give us the brief version if you want.
Okay. So let's see how fast I can gallop through this.
Yeah, you'll be fine. I'm sure you're a great communicator. You'll be fine.
I was becoming more and more shy, more and more self conscious. But there was a man who worked for me and to protect the guilty. We will call him Peter Smith. Peter smith had an IQ of 200.
Wow.
But he never had really done anything with his life other than become a really outstanding rice grower, which is a wonderful thing. But he wasn't living up to his potential. And one day I realized why he wasn't. He was afraid of failure. It was just so comfortable to. To not stretch himself. And I decided one day that I would try to make my life the opposite of his, that I would not be afraid of failure. And if I was going to try to do what I really wanted to do, which was radio, television, newspapers, public speaking, yes. That I had to overcome my lisp. So I went to a speech therapist who told me, at your age, and we're talking, like, maybe, I think somewhere around 1978 that speech therapists in that period were unable to cure somebody with a severe lisp who's 38 years old. So I went to another therapist. She also told me, can't be done. Went to third one, same story, with a little minor wrinkle. She said, I can't help you, but I'd love to take your money. I mean, you can come if you want, but I. I don't think I can help you. Well, I went for a full year, and lo and behold, at the end of the year, no progress for nine months. But at the end of the year, I had overcome my lisp and I began auditioning for television. I began sending articles out to newspapers, and within a year I had a television show. Within two years, it was syndicated to 76 stations. I've collected in my life a very great number of rejection letters for articles or written things that I've submitted. But within something like five years, I was the most widely syndicated environmental writer in the country. And it's as if everything switched when I decided to make my life the opposite of Peter Smith. That I would. I would find out what my obstacles were, I would overcome them, and then I wouldn't be afraid of failure. I would, you know, when I got a rejection letter or a turndown for an audition, I don't care. That's a mark of success because I tried. And where it got me.
Thanks for the no. Is what we always tell people in sales. So great attitude lesson for 30. How to overcome your biggest challenge. Right. So it sounds like when you hit 40 and you go through your 40s, it may have been a bit of a reset and it may have been a new launch. I'd love to know what was the name of your TV show? And then what was the attitude lesson for you at 40 or in your 40s?
Okay, Mitzi's country Magazine.
All right, I got it. I'm going to look that up.
And it started out as a farm show because I was also still growing rice. Yes, but are we talking of lessons for the 40s?
Yes. So just your attitude. What's the attitude lesson in your 40s that somebody can take and go? You know what Mitzi said? There's a female out there in her 40s that's waiting for you to say, honey, let me tell you what I Learned in my 40s. This is what I Want to get to.
Well, I got myself out of a horrible marriage.
Wonderful.
Right. And I was single for about three years before I met Frank Perdue, who was the love of my life. And he was as great as a husband as my previous one was. Not great.
Yeah. And so how did you muster the courage to get out of that situation? I'm guessing you were married probably for a long time, 15, 20 years of this person.
It was 17 years and two children. But I have a religious belief that marriage is forever.
Yes.
So I didn't instigate a divorce. However, the good Lord was kind to me because, well, I'll use again, a fake name to protect the guilty. Ronald.
Yes, Ronald.
Okay. Ronald met a Venezuelan oil heiress.
Oh, there you go.
And he wanted a divorce. And then that coincided with. Ronald, by the way, was a former Catholic priest. Not just a priest, a monk.
Sure.
And when we married, he had never bothered to go through the procedure for not becoming a priest. I mean, he was a priest when we married, although he hadn't told me that. But it turns out that the marriage was begun under false pretenses, so it.
Was probably annulled in the Catholic Church, maybe.
Well, as far as my conscience goes, I didn't need an annulment. It was enough to know that it could have been annulled because it was very conspicuously begun under false pretenses.
Yes. And I'm a Catholic boy, so I know all about it. So here.
Okay, so that gave my conscience. I sworn in front of God and men. But the dear Lord allows for.
I love it. So, ladies, if you're sitting there and you're in a marriage that you don't want to be in, the attitude lesson is introduce your husband that you no longer want to be married to. To a Venezuelan oil heiress, and things may change for you. All right, so, Mitzi, we. And I think Jason was at 40s or 50s. Have we turned 50? I think that was 40. All right, so, Mitzi, do you remember your 50th birthday? Where were you? And what's your attitude lesson when you were working at 50 or in your 50s?
Okay, in my 50s, I was gloriously happy. Married to a good man.
Yeah.
Somebody with values, who's kind and generous and cares about people. And I loved being part of his life. But I did keep up my. I mentioned that I was the most widely syndicated environmental writer. I kept that up.
Yeah.
That's because I needed some identity in my own. And so it just worked out because being a writer, I could travel around the world with him, which we did because, you know, in a good year, which this is not, we could be selling in 50 different countries, maybe 70. And Frank had a deep belief that it was a really good thing to call in your customers, whether it's Tokyo or Singapore or wherever.
That's fantastic. So now we move to 60. And what were you doing when you were 60? What's the attitude lesson for those gappers, for those females or males? What did 60 teach you? Do you remember even being sick, turning 60 and what was going on?
Well, I loved my 60s. Not as much as my 70s, but I loved my 60s. I felt that by age 60, I didn't feel like a particularly different person from when I was younger, except that I knew so much more, I had so much more experience. I could evaluate things from a broader perspective. I would describe myself. Oh, I was more into physical fitness and diet. And so I'm feeling better in my 60s than I did in my 40s. Right.
We certainly know how to poison our bodies in our 40s, don't we? And 30s, I love it. So that appreciation, which is attitude booster number nine, we base our book on the 10 attitude boosters, which is eat right and exercise. So sounds like that's what was happening in your 60s. And so you're not 80 yet. So I'm not going to be able to ask you about your 80th and your 80 knowledge through the decades. But we haven't talked about 70, so I'd love to know best ever.
I mean, it's just. It's hard for me to imagine how it could get better than this. Because in my 70s, I love being engaged. I have a personal rule which I actually followed all my life that I want every year to take some kind of course. And it might be first aid, it might be nuclear particle physics, it might be art appreciation, but just in one way. Oh, and computer database programming. I recommend that to everybody. I don't think everybody's going to take me up on that. But that means that today at age 79, I've got. Oh, this is immodest to say it, but be honest. I have a bigger talent stack than I had when I was younger. I mean, when I've got a problem between people and knowledge, I've got ways of dealing with things. So for me, the older the better.
Oh, I love it.
And I'm more into physical fitness and diet and mental attitude than ever before. So I feel better, I've got more energy. I feel that. I feel that working on a project that I Care about with all my heart and soul. Namely, combating human trafficking. This is best. Well, I mean, I wish Frank were still alive, but since that's not on offer, this is the best time of my life.
Well, hopefully his spirit is with you. Certainly his attitude has remained with you. And you've just passed been so delightful. If you could, what would your message of hope be for the people that are listening today that aren't 79, that are battling, that are trying to bridge the gap from where they are to where they want to be, from bridging the gap from who they are to who they wish to become. Because I know that that gal at 20, 30, 40 isn't the person I'm talking to today. That. But the ability to bridge the gap is certainly there for everybody. What would your message of hope be? What is your mantra? What can you tell our people to keep them positive and happy?
Okay. Well, I can remember horrible times in my 30s and 40s in a seriously unhappy marriage to somebody who was basically, well, no, I better not say how absolutely terrible he was, because I do have kids who might listen to this, but I used to think that if I hadn't gotten out of the marriage, I might not even be alive. Yeah, I mean, it was horrible. But I think the message is things can change in the most unexpected ways. It looks as if you'll never be happy again. You're convinced you'll never be happy again, and then there's this curve in the road and things can change. So if you're going through a really, really, really tough time right now, health, finances, emotional. Keep in mind that things can change and believe in yourself and struggle through it, because there can be good things on the other side.
It makes me think of the saying, it's always darkest before the dawn. And I want to thank you, Mitzi, because you are the sunshine that brought dawn to the Get Attitude podcast today. Your smile is infectious, your attitude is contagious, and your story is just so palpable and relevant for everybody that's listening in. We just want to thank you so much and we're so supported, grateful that you shared with us your story and the Get Attitude podcast and all of our gaffers. Thank you. We will look you up winthe fight.org let's help Mitzi do what she's meant to do. Thank you again, Mitzi, for being on the Get Attitude podcast. This podcast is a part of the C Suite Radio Network. For more top business podcasts, visit c-sweetradio.com.
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