#Success

Hello, everyone. Hello. Hello. Hello. Welcome to day two of the Start Strong Challenge. How are you doing today? So I'm gonna wait for everyone to join, but in the meantime, I'm just gonna tell you that I was looking at your posts on Facebook for those of you who are inside the Facebook group, and I have to tell you that I've seen some incredible, incredible goals there. I'm so happy for you, and I'm proud for you that you are. You were able to take the time and focus on what you want for yourself and how you envision 2024 to be like. So I just wanted to say kudos and congratulations, and that is such a strong start for the start strong challenge and for 2024. All right. Hello. Hello, everyone. Good. I see that people are joining in, and today we are going to talk about success, and I'm going to explain why. So of course we want to achieve success. Of course accomplishing our goals means that we will succeed in 2024, but I want to talk about the concept of success and what it takes to experience success. And what does success even look like? Here's the thing. So often we tend to focus on the negative. This is just human nature. It's something that we do so that we survive, so that we don't get hurt, so we don't get rejected, so we are not abandoned, so we are not disliked, so we are not criticized, right? So we're not pushed out of the group. So we are afraid to play it safe and be like, everything's gonna be okay. We're always in this mindset of what could go wrong, right? And it's. It's like, you know, when you are fighting for your life or you're trying to survive, you always have to think about what could possibly go wrong. You have to notice the negative things so you will be able to survive. But that's, you know, like when. When thousands and thousands of years ago, when you had to survive. And our brain is still wired in this really primal way, right? That negativity means danger, right. Or saves you from danger. And the fear that we're experiencing is designed to help us or is designed to keep us safe, safer from danger. So we feel fear. We are alert. We are ready for everything, right? We always see what could possibly go wrong, and that way we are able to keep ourselves safe. Now, this is true in many situations back in the day and still today, but not when it comes to communicating in English. You are never in danger when it comes to safety. Speaking a second language, your life is not at stake, and you are not going to be rejected or abandoned. And even if you might be criticized, it doesn't mean that it will have a massive impact on your life, except for maybe you'll feel bad for a little bit yet. We are wired to always look at the negative, right? To focus on the negative. So when you think about it, when you think about your English journey or how your day went, or in a simple interaction, how it goes, then we usually focus on what did not go well. We usually focus on what we haven't achieved yet. You know, like, even when I ask students about their success, they often say, yes, I was able to do this, and that it's not where I wanted to be, but still, right? Like, so even when we talk about things that we have accomplished, we have to, you know, to add a caveat and say, wait, wait. But it's not yet where I want it to be because we're always like, you know, we don't allow ourselves to just be positive and optimistic and content with what we have and what we've achieved. It often sounds like we are bragging or we're, you know, we're too proud of. Of. Of what we're doing with. And. And I'm here to say that not only it's not a bad thing to do, that it's also essential and important for you to be able to achieve your goals. Because if you want to succeed in something new that you haven't accomplished yet, you have to look at what is available to you, and you have to look at proof that you can do hard things. You have to look at proof that you're capable of dealing with challenges, because we tend to forget that. And then what happens is that we think that we are incapable, that we'll never be able to get it. Now here's the the truth. Your brain has already learned one language. Your brain is perfectly capable of learning a new language, of learning a language you speak your first language. Therefore, you are perfectly capable of speaking a second language and a third language. Right? It might take longer, it might be a little harder, but you're able to do it. But we take it for granted. We don't think about the fact that your brain has already learned a language, that you have, you know, been able to do that successfully. Instead, you know, we always think about what's not good yet in how we speak now. So today, as part of the checklist that you will get and as part of today's training, I want to talk about acknowledging our accomplishments and acknowledging Our successes in the checklist. Today, I want to talk. I shared three questions. The first question, and I'm going to explain why. I want you to go into this. I asked you to list three things that you are able. You were able to overcome in 2023. So I want to look back at 2023, and I want you to think about all those things that you. That were really hard for you, but you were able to manage them. You were able to overcome them, even though you might feel like they were failures. Or maybe you might say to yourself, well, I could have done so much better. Still, you were able to get past it. You were able to overcome it. And it doesn't have to be about English. It could be a professional challenge, could be a personal challenge, a relationship issue, a personal issue, whatever that is. I want you to think of three things that were really hard for you, but you were able to overcome. Now, it could also be silly things. For example, you needed to apply for something or to change your status somewhere in. And it just took you so long because you were afraid of just understanding how this works, and you ended up doing it in five minutes. That is also something that I want you to acknowledge. So if you have more than three things, absolutely do it. So this is a reminder that we are capable of doing hard things. And if we were able to do it, then we'll be able to do other hard things, which is, you know, working through your goals in 2024 and even setting bigger goals later on. Okay, so this is the first thing I want you to focus on, and that is why. And then I want you to list three of your strengths that will help you make 2024 successful. So whether we're talking about reaching your goals or just generally successful, we'll talk more about what that looks like and how you want to feel tomorrow. But generally successful, meaning that you feel good, you feel like you are fulfilling your purpose, you feel you're healthy, you are happy. So all of those things will make you feel like 2024 has been successful 12 months from now. But to experience that, we have to remind ourselves of the resources that we have. Okay, what do you have? What characteristics, what skills, what sensitivities do you have that will allow you to fulfill your potential, that will allow you accomplish your goals? Is it determination? Is it emotional intelligence? Is it creativity? Is it being friendly and being able to make a lot of connections and a lot of friends? Okay, so I want you to think about at least three strengths that will help you make 2024 successful and reach your goals. Now, again, why is that important? We need to remember our resources, our internal resources that we don't have to depend on anyone to get things and to get things done right. It's all us. Is it the way you're able to work with your mind? Is it your mindset? Is it your excitement about big projects, whatever that is, I want you to list that as well. Okay. So challenges you were able to overcome. To remind ourselves that we're capable of doing hard things. Strengths. To remember that all resources are within us. Right. And we're able to achieve anything simply by depending on ourselves. Okay. And the last thing is to learn how to celebrate your wins. Right? To celebrate accomplishments. Because if we forget to celebrate accomplishments, we tend to think only about the things that are not good, that are not working. Right? This is why in my communities and beyond and new sound, we celebrate. Celebrate weekly. Our weekly wins. It is so important to remind yourself the things that do work well. Okay? And this is what I want you to do. What is something you felt proud of in 2023? So at least one thing. But you can also create a list of 10 different things that you are proud of that you consider as a win. And you know what? When we had our annual session, a review of our session, one of the things that were, for me were the most significant. Like my biggest takeaway. My. You know, my, my. One of the best things that happened to me in the previous week year was actually something that has failed in. In something that I wanted to do there. There was a big project and the results weren't exactly this as I expected them to be. Right. So technically you. It was a failure. But it wasn't really, because I've learned so much from that mistake. Because it's not a mistake. We did things differently. We didn't see the results that we expected. It was still great. But, you know, I could have said, hey, you know, that sucked. That was not how I planned it to be. But no, because that was just like a great opportunity for me to take it and do it in a different way in a way that now I know would work. Okay, so even a perceived failure could be something that you can consider as a win, could be something that you could be proud of because it's an opportunity to learn. And that is the mindset I want you to have, both in terms of being able to celebrate your wins and acknowledge them. Because we often also overlook those small wins, but also never consider a failure as a true failure. If you can learn something from it if you've learned from it, and then it's just a step towards your success. So the last thing I want you to reflect on today is what is something you felt proud of in 2023? So now I want you to share this a little bit in the chat. What is something that you are proud of that you feel proud of, that you've accomplished in 2023? Okay, so let's see. I'm looking at some of the comments and Devin says perseverance, which is a. Wait, let me show it to you. Oh, but this is. I accidentally clicked on it. But I think it's important to notice it's harder to acknowledge the positives. So thank you for this exercise. And I would make it a daily exercise. Really. It's good that we're doing it now to just kind of like, shake off all the negativity and. And step into the right mindset. But it's something that you should do daily. One of the exercises I give to my students is to write a gratitude list about all the things that are possible in their lives thanks to English. Because we tend to have a love, love, hate relationship with our English. Like, we love it, we want to use it, but then we also resent it. We resent our progress or lack of progress. We resent English in general sometimes. So we definitely want to be mindful of that and start shifting our relationship. I always say, like, if, you know, imagine English is a good friend of yours and you know, like, if you kept saying crappy things about a friend, they wouldn't stay with you for a long time. Right? They wouldn't be your friend for a long time. So treat your English with love, compassion and. And respect. So if you have a tendency and put me in the comments if you're like that, like, to. To hate your English and to. To hate on your English and to, you know, kind of say nasty things about yourself in English or I suck. My English is bad. My accent is horrible. I always make mistakes. Right. If you have a tendency of saying all those negative things about your English, imagine English being your friend. And what would she say? I'm sure she wouldn't be pleased with it. And I'm sure she wouldn't say your friend. So let's make English your friend in 2024 and only say kind things about it. Okay. Her. About her. I think English is a woman. Okay? So France says. France from France says. In June, I set the intention to communicate in foreign languages, English and Italian. And I've taken advantage of. Of each Opportunity to do it. That's a huge win. So I celebrate you. Wait, do I have like a confetti here? No, I don't. But I celebrate you because that's pretty amazing. And, and setting an intention and acting on it and making sure that you do what you say you're going to do is one of the first things that you need to celebrate. Because having self integrity, doing what you say you're going to do is a rare resource. Right? Most people say things, but they don't do what they say they're going to do. Especially when no one's looking, when it's just about them. We have more integrity when it comes to other people. But self integrity is something that we forget because it's like we, we, it's kind of like we use it up on other people. We, we make promises and then we will make sure that we fulfill those promises because they're expecting us to. But then we don't do it with ourselves. So making a promise and fulfilling it when it's just you, when no one else is looking is one of the best, one of the first things that you need to celebrate. Ooh. Massey says, I finally finished my MA thesis in 2023. That's incredible. Incredible. I got my USA resident visa. Amazing. Achieved advanced certificate. Amazing. You guys, this is so inspiring. So, so inspiring. Now what is something that you were able to overcome in 2023? Let me know in the chat. What is something that you were able to overcome thanks to your strengths? Right. So now we're going to combine this question. Something that you were able to overcome that was hard for you. Maybe you considered it to be a failure, but you were able to overcome it. Wow, Rosa, I'm sending you a big, big hug here. Overcome depression and manage to survive life. That's, that's the biggest thing. That's the biggest thing. And we're sending you love. And may this keep going on a, on a good path for you. Good. Now I'm going to wrap up. First of all, really take the time to answer these questions. Some of you have already answered this. These questions. That's great. Great. I also want to encourage you today to record a video answering those questions. Remember, we're going to do things a little differently. So if you're not used to making videos, which by the way, is a tool that we constantly use in our programs and it has proven to be effective and allows really quick progress. Making videos in English, because first of all, it's a great way for you to give yourself feedback. It's a great way to show up in English and deal with all the demons that you might have about yourself, about your English, about how you show up. Right. It's kind of like you put yourself out there. It allows you to practice vulnerability. So you're saying to yourself, I'm willing to receive criticism. It forces you to battle perfectionism. Because I've never seen a video that is perfect. And I've made a lot of videos in my life, and I've never looked at a video that I've made and said, this is perfect. Never. So letting go of that perfectionism and saying, I'm going to post it as is is a huge win as well. Right. And I want you to experience it. So using and posting videos here in the group is a great way to battle battle perfectionism. And of course, it's a great opportunity to practice your English and fluency because you will be talking and about things that you're. That you usually don't talk about. Okay, so this is why I want you to answer those questions and then be courageous and post a video about it. Share it with the group. And also, this is how you make connections. Because the purpose of this challenge, the reason why I'm. I'm creating this group for people to connect and all the zoom sessions, is to really foster a community so that you can see that you don't have to be on your own, you don't have to do it alone, that there are a lot of people that are exactly where you are at right now. And honestly, knowing that is. Is really comforting and inspiring. And that's what I want you to experience. Again, our courses and free community on Facebook are based on community learning. So we've seen that work. And I want you, if you're new to our community, I want you to experience that as well. So join the conversation groups and post videos. And if you're really not confident enough to do it, just make a video and save it to yourself. And you can also comment on other people's videos. Okay, good. I'll do the video. Okay, good. This is it, my friends. This is how you do things differently. Sorry, I don't see your name, but I'm going to look it up later. So make a video, do things differently. Also, you can share more about it in the conversation groups. I hope you're joining the conversation groups. It's only seven days, so take advantage of all the opportunities that you have inside the Start Strong challenge. We have six more days to go. All right, so that's it for Today, celebrate your successes. Acknowledge your strengths. Recognize what you were able to overcome that you can, and that you can do hard things right and remind yourself of all of that. And that will put you in the mindset of being able to achieve almost anything, because you have what it takes. You already have what it takes. You don't need anything else. You just need focus. You just need to take action, and you just need to know where you're going. And we're already doing it. Okay? If you haven't done yesterday's tasks, go back and do it, because you need those three goals. It's not a lot. Should take you five minutes. Do it. And also complete today's questions. Okay? Do the sprints and just enjoy the experience and the opportunity. Okay? And Joy says, I'm so shy to do videos. I need to overcome this. You know, there's like, what's the worst thing that could happen, Joyce? What's the worst thing that could happen? And what's the best thing that could happen? The worst thing that could happen, let me tell you this, is that no one comments on your video. The thing that you're imagining is that you start getting a lot of negative comments now. That would not happen. We would not let it happen. And this is not the community where it happens. So this is just like a. A nightmare that you might have in your head. So please eliminate that. That's not possible. It's just like saying, you know, right now, you know, a steroid is going to hit the Earth, and that's it for. For planet Earth, right? Like, it's. It's just not gonna happen. So the worst thing that could happen, really, is you not. You're not gonna get any feedback on your video because the algorithm pushed it down. That's the worst case. Can you handle it? Can you handle it? This price for the possibility of getting this energy boost from people, from making strong connections, from saying to yourself, I've done something different, and maybe I can challenge myself even more. Right? Proving to yourself that you're capable of doing it. Are you willing to pay the price of people not commenting in your videos or just feeling a little uncomfortable and exposed? Remember, it's a safe group. It's a small group. Smaller. Right? Like, it's not tens and tens of thousands of people. And we are here to make sure that you're safe. So if someone bothers you or comments inappropriately on your videos, we will be there to monitor it. You can always tag us if something happens. Okay? By the way, I did not say that I always say it in my challenges. If you get a lot of friend requests and messages from people within the group that you do not know, please let us know because we're not allowing this. You're not allowed to contact privately, people who don't know you and you don't know on a. On a friendly level. Okay? So if you are uncomfortable posting videos because you don't want to get a lot of private messages, please let us know. Send us a screenshot of the private message of the member and we will immediately remove them from all of our groups. So please maintain the communication to. For the. The. The zoom calls and inside the Facebook group. Okay, good. Joyce, I hope. I hope I convinced you. And tag me if you post a video so I can say, hi. I know you're scared. Leela says I'm scared to post videos. But again, like, what are you scared of? Nothing bad is really going to happen. Are you willing to risk being scared and doing it anyway for the opportunity that comes with getting comfortable with videos? Again, I'm speaking from experience because many, many of my students have made massive progress simply thanks to videos. They would post daily videos and their fluency just skyrocketed. All right? So know that it is possible for you as well. And also remember that when it comes to goals and sharing wins. This is a skill that we need to practice, and it makes you stronger and more capable of achieving what you want to achieve. All right, my friends, that's it. Go download the checklist. If you haven't yet, go fill out day two questions. Do the sprint. If you haven't. Good morning, good evening, good afternoon, wherever you are in the world, and I will see you tomorrow. Bye, my friends.