Hal Elrod shares how emotional intelligence and meditation shape his Miracle Morning routine. He discusses consciously choosing emotional states to reach goals and reflects on lessons from his cancer diagnosis.
Chapters
In two words, it's emotional intelligence, right? I mean, that's. Emotional intelligence is the ability to identify and self regulate your emotional state. I think it's the ultimate superpower, because think about that. If you can identify what causes your emotions and then you can regulate your emotional state to the point where you literally go, what do I need to feel today to be at my best? And I know we're going to talk about the miracle morning today, but I'll get ahead of us a little bit. One of the practices that I do in my miracle morning, and I'll even say the miracle morning in general, I view it as, this is a daily practice that enables me to choose, consciously choose what is the optimal state that I need to be in today to be at my best to achieve everything I want in my life. And then I use a practice I call emotional optimization meditation, where not just following my breath and clearing my mind, but I actually ask that question. Then I identify, you know what? Today I really. I've got this big presentation or I've got this meeting with Fleet. I need to be really connected to my purpose. I need to be really present and open and enthusiastic and confident. So I identify the emotional state or states that I want to be in, and then I write them down and. And I close my eyes and I get myself into that state. Now, to do that, I might ask myself, when was the last time that I. That I. That I showed up for something like this in the way that I need to today? And I'll remember. I'll go, that's right. And I'll recall that state and I'll go back to that state. And once I feel like I've got a hold of it, I'll set my timer and I'll meditate. Or I almost like the word marinate in that state. And what happens, I'm literally. When you do this, you're hardwiring your nervous system. You're reprogramming your subconscious mind. You are acclimating, activating. And then. What's the word I'm looking for? You're programming, if you will, that state so that you can access it at will. And so for me, emotions, I believe that we don't have to be at the mercy of our circumstances or outside forces. Human beings, most of us, assume that our emotions are dictated by external forces. If you meet someone and they're upset, you go, why are you upset? They don't. They rarely take responsibility for the emotional state that they're in. And they always have someone or something to blame. Of course I'm upset. Didn't you hear what he said to me? Or of course I'm sad. Don't you know what I lost? And for me, there's value in all emotions. That five minute rule that I talked about earlier, that was the idea that, hey, you set your timer for five minutes when something goes wrong and you allow yourselves to fully feel, authentically feel whatever emotion comes up for you, cry, vent, scream, whatever it is. But understand that you, once you express the emotion and you feel it, you then get to choose whether you continue to dwell in that state. And if it's not productive, why would you do that? It's only a lack of awareness. It's unconscious emotional. Right experience where you would dwell in a state that doesn't serve you, that's detrimental to you. And that's why the five minute rule is where you set the timer, it goes off after five minutes and it reminds you, okay, wait, you've been dwelling on this for five minutes. You've been allowing yourself to fully express and experience those emotions. And then you consciously go, now you're conscious and you go, okay, do these emotions serve me? Do I maybe need another five minutes? Or maybe I need the day. Maybe I need to take a day to just feel. That's fine. But the point is that you are living a conscious life and you're going, okay, at some point, whether it's five minutes or five, whatever, you set the timer, you go, I'm done. I can't change what happened. Now, what emotion would best serve me? Where do I want to go from here? And what mental and emotional state is most congruent and aligned with where I want to go? Great. How do I get in that state? And on day one, that might feel foreign, you're like, well, this is weird. Normally I get upset and I stay upset, but with practice of this five minute rule, you eventually take control of your emotional state. And when I was diagnosed with cancer, the day that I was diagnosed, I didn't even set the timer for five minutes because I've done this for so long. I went, I can't change it. I have cancer. I've been given a 20 to 30% chance of surviving. What is the best course of action and what state should I be in? And I told my wife the day I was diagnosed, sweetheart, I know this is hard for you, and I am so sorry that our family has to go through this. But I want you to know I've decided I will be the happiest and the most grateful I have ever been while I endure the most difficult time in my life. And I want to invite everyone to consider again. These aren't mutually exclusive. It isn't just bad things happen to me, so I have to feel bad. It's no matter what happens to me, I have the power to consciously choose how I feel, what I think, and how I show up to any experience that I'm facing in my life.
