Love is about being in harmony with another person on three levels....

Hello, it's Tuesday again. It's Lunch and Learn time, and welcome back to this weekly live that, um, I share some really interesting information, and I hope that you're enjoying them. If you're live, please say hello. It's so lovely for me to connect with you live here every Tuesday. But if you're watching the replay, just put hashtag replay and I know that you've watched it. And if there's any subject that I haven't shared that you would like me to talk about, please don't hesitate to message me or put it in the comments below, whatever is easy for you. For those of you who haven't met me before, let me introduce myself. My name is Heather Prince and I'm also known as the Root Master which is actually the name of my website, because I get to the core root of whatever's going on in your life that's keeping you awake at night or causing you to feel stuck. And it's all about moving forwards fearlessly. So today I want to share with you love is about being in harmony with another person on 3 levels. That's intellectually, emotionally, and physically. So let's start today. So for those of you that have just joined, I will share again that today we will look at number one, how do relationships affect you intellectually? Number 2, how do relationships affect you emotionally? And number 3, how do relationships affect you physically? Because we're not always consciously aware of how they affect us. And there's one other thing that connects people in a love relationship, and I will share with that, um, about that nearer the end. So keep watching. So intellectually, someone who is intellectually compatible has a deep interest in one person, and they work well with others who are compatible on the same level. It's about being aligned with that person, and they have ideas that complement their partners, and they're excited to share their thoughts and values with someone who understands their passions and interests. Because a person who is intellectually compatible with their partner, um, it gives them room to grow. Their thoughts and ideas are elements of attraction, um, to their partner, and their attraction is more than just physical, um, because that soon peters out. When relationships have an intellectually, uh, compatible partner they've— they have it— they kind of tend to last longer because of the deep connections that they establish between one another. So it's not all about just an intellectual connection in a love relationship. It's, it's a whole package. Let's have a look at the next slide where there's an emotional connection. Now, the benefits of social connections and good mental health are numerous. The proven links include lower rates of anxiety and depression, higher self-esteem, greater empathy, and more trusting and cooperative relationships. Because you love their sense of humor, um, you can't stop laughing at their silly jokes, um, and you just, you know, take on their, their little quirks, their little— their qualities, and, and you want to share them with others. And, and that's it. On an emotional level, there's, there's that, there's that connection. And physically, it is an act or reaction such as an expression of feelings, including close friendship or platonic love or romantic love or sexual attraction between people. Now, examples of, um, physical intimacy, being, you know, being, you know, held by them, um, and feeling that, you know, in the— in, you know, maybe in your stomach. Um, it's not just about sex because everyone thinks, oh, the physical part of the relationship is sex. But, you know, it can just be very intimate to look into each other's eyes. It can be very intimate just to have a cuddle, just to be held. Uh, feeling secure, feeling stable. It's not all about wild sex. And if any of you have had experiences of one-night stand, how did that honestly make you feel? And did it lead to a long-term relationship? Because that high physical activity at the very beginning can soon peter out, or the other person can actually disappear. So if any of you have ever experienced that, then I'm sure that you've learned by, by that, uh, experience. Now it's really important to have emotional maturity, uh, to share your values when it comes to creating the relationship of your dreams. And I spoke about healing the inner child Um, in my last week's Lunch and Learn, if you haven't watched it, um, it is on YouTube, it is on the Facebook page where you're watching now if you scroll down. Because the inner child is the kind of child that would stamp its feet and get really angry and get in a tantrum, but we need emotional maturity in a relationship as to Adults to say, hmm, we disagree about this topic. Let's sit down and let's voice both our views and see if we can come to some kind of a compromise. And let's not shout at each other or scream or frighten the children if there's children around. And let's just sort this out like 2 mature adults. Really important. And to know Values. Um, I worked with a couple, and, uh, one woman's value was freedom. And she loved to go away at weekends to the health spa with the girls— not every weekend, but once in a while. She liked to go on, um, girls' night outs, and she liked that freedom within her relationship. And the guy that she was with was aligned beautifully because his value was freedom. He loved to go mountaineering, he loved to go fishing, and he wanted that freedom in the relationship. So they were both aligned with the same values, which is so important, especially when you first meet someone, is to know what your values are and to discover what their values are. Because if they're aligned, it's win-win, and if it isn't, there is going to be a problem. So from my experience, trust, friendship, and faith are key, and so are work ethic, the ability to take responsibility, and loyalty. They're all the values that have come up in all the years that I've been working with my clients. And I know myself, my top value is trust. And I'm going to talk about trust today because it resonates with me personally and with many of the ladies that I've worked with, and also about faith. And a lot of people think faith is to do with religion. Um, not, not from my perspective. So let's have a look at trust because it's a bedrock as a relationship value. Trust in relationships isn't one-dimensional, a fact that's overlooked. Without trust, neither you or your partner can be comfortable being vulnerable with each other. And that's the other topic I spoke about in last week's Lunch and Learn— being vulnerable with your partner. Um, that safety, that vulnerability and the ability to share who we are without judgment gives us the opportunity to connect in a way that we often don't get in other aspects of our lives. So that brings about a level of contentment because it's a safe place to fully be who you are. And establishing trust brings along consistency and reliability. Um, trust is trust that this person is going to show up for me the way I hope when I need them most. And let's talk about the other value, faith, because believing in your relationship is a great way to make your love life better. Believing in your relationship and believing that you will help each other deal with whatever life hands you is a great way to make your love life better. Because when couples believe in one another and see their relationship as, as a, as a team, as a, as a tight commitment, you can move forward so much easier and make everything so much more fun. And the willingness to believe that you are with the right person for the right reasons is the key to a happy relationship. So the person we fall in love with often reflects to us whatever areas we're insecure in, like needing safety or security, or, or of not wanting to be alone. So it's like a mirror being held up in front of us. So the mirror— the people we are in relationships with are always a mirror. Reflecting our own beliefs, and simultaneously we are mirrors reflecting their beliefs. And that's a quote from Shakti Gawain, which I think is really relevant. And those with poor relationships have an unhealthy relationship with, with themselves. They, they need to focus on themselves, others, uh, not, not others to define them We have to work on ourselves first because we have to take on board that if we're not getting respect, for example, that we need to work on self-respect. If somebody is mirroring to us that they don't think we're worth it, we've got to work on our own self-worth. So, um, when I work with clients, we look at self-belief, Self-love, self-esteem, self-respect, self-confidence, all of what I call the selfies, because it's so important to look at how people are mirroring what we need to learn. Um, there are many factors that come into play in a relationship. The dynamics are different for every person, so it is difficult to say the reason for why breakups is clear. It's, it's a combination of factors. Um, it's a person's relationship with others, and especially a partner, that mirror back to them what, what's going on. Um, and if a person's relationship with the self, as I've said, is unhealthy, it's likely that their relationship is, is unhealthy too, because relationships make you see things in yourself that you might not have been aware of otherwise. So I always say it's really good in a relationship because you learn so much about yourself. And people that shut their heart and close down and are not in a relationship, you stop learning. You stop learning because there's nobody there mirroring back to you what it is that you need to address. It's all about communication, it's about compromise, conflict resolution. We learn so much when we're in a relationship. Um, a lot of people, you know, attract what they might refer to as a crazy person into their life, and they can't see this up front when they first meet the person. Um, a lot of people have asked me that question, why is it I keep meeting the wrong guy? Um, well, the truth is Like attracts like. A bird attracts a bird, a rabbit attracts a rabbit, a dog attracts a dog. Um, so positive self-talk is critical when you wish to attract your true counterpart. If you're wondering if your date is judging your job title or telling yourself that you should have slimmed down before dating again, you inevitably project out this invisible energy of uncertainty, which isn't very pleasant. So dating with confidence starts with embracing and valuing who you are now at this moment in time. Your job title does not determine your self-worth, or what's in your bank account. It's a lot more than that. Uh, behind me on the board, um, you'll not be able to see it, but there's self-understanding, self-acceptance, self-love, self-recognition, and self-reflection are all the ingredients to make this beautiful, delicious cake of self-worth. So if you're buying into the lies about yourself that increase insecurity, you're setting yourself up for failure. Because confidence is attractive, which is why I've got that in the Fearlessly Moving Forwards method. Um, you know, you develop a strong sense of self, um, and you can start challenging the lies and that negative narrator in your mind, and you can replace those old outdated thoughts and beliefs with the new true ones in your current reality. So you can choose who you fall in love with or don't fall in love with based on your values, as I've mentioned earlier on. And we had a look at 2 of them, but what are your values? Um, they're things that we believe that are important deep down, and they're probably the measures that you use to tell If your life is turning out the way that you want it to. So it's really important that, um, you know what your values are, and therefore whether the person that you meet or that you're with is aligned with those values. When in doubt, always remember this famous quote: when someone shows you who they are believe them the first time, because a leopard doesn't change its spots. It really doesn't. So I'd like to thank you so much for watching today's Lunch and Learn. And if you would like to opt into my bundle of freebies, which are available on my website, you can go on to www therootmaster.com /get-freebies, and there it is on the screen for you if you want to jot that down. So I'll just repeat that to you again. It's www.therootmaster.com/get-freebies, and in that you will get— if you've come out of a relationship, you would get Forgiving Your Ex meditation, because the only person that's harmed by holding on to that resentment and anger is you, not them. So it's a really great, um, process for you to open your mind to, and it might take time, um, for you to repeat it, but it's, it's good for your well-being. The second thing you'll get is a workbook about feeling lonely if you are now solo after being part of a relationship. And the third thing you will get from me is a podcast of affirmations that you can listen to and repeat saying, I am enough. Because most of the clients that I've worked with have had a core belief of, I'm not thin enough, I'm not young enough, I'm not clever enough, All whatever. I am not whatever enough. So that is a really brilliant tool to listen to and speak with, to put it out there to the law of attraction that actually I am enough. And if you liked this content today, please like it, please share. If you've got any questions, you can email me at heather@heatherprince.com. At heatherprince.co.uk. And as I've said, my website is therootmaster.com. So there you go, there's Lunch and Learn today. And I've stopped sharing the screen for you. And if you've got any comments, please do share what you found that was something that you gained from watching Lunch and Learn today. And I hope to see you next Tuesday for the next Lunch and Learn. Have a great week, everyone. I'm off now on retreat with a group of lovely ladies to Inverness, and we're staying in a beautiful house next to Loch Ness. So if you haven't joined my weekly newsletter please opt in on my website and you'll know all the events and news, um, what's going on in the world of Heather. Bye-bye.