Brian Johnson advises moving beyond mere acceptance by consciously choosing different actions when those actions lead to unwanted states. He recommends compassionate, moment-to-moment awareness (the "flashlight") paired with decisive behavior change (the "hammer") without shame or struggle, using metaphors (golfer, bad shots) to normalize setbacks and to refocus on present choices.
At some point, you need to move past acceptance. If you eat a certain type of food and it makes you sick, it's not wise to continue to eat that certain type of food. Again, you need to make the choice, do you want to feel this state, or do you want to feel a different state? And if you are doing certain things that you know lead you to a state that you prefer not to experience, then let's step back, shine a flashlight of compassion, and bring the hammer and just change our behavior. There's no need for shame. There's really no need for struggle. We're the golfer that knows we're going to hit five bad shots around. So when we hit a bad shot, we don't get upset with ourselves. We say, there's the first bad shot. And then I focus on what's important now. Then there's no falling off the wagon in some dramatic sense, because I didn't bring a hammer to myself each time I brought the flashlight moment to moment to moment. Because that little glitch, when I look at it properly and I turn it around quickly and I simultaneously embrace my state, the pain of the pain goes away.
