Hesed Ojieh breaks down ten things love cannot do: pay your bills, fix someone unwilling to change, replace respect, heal deep insecurity, erase trauma, or compensate for incompatibility. Real relationships need financial responsibility, mutual effort, and shared values, not just affection.
Said OJ, 10 things love can never do for you. I know the feeling of love. I know the power of falling in love. I know the drive. If you've never fallen in love, you won't know what I'm talking about. But I want to show you 10 things that love can never do for you. Number 1, love can never pay your bills forever. It doesn't matter how much that person loves you, it will be difficult for love to continuously pay your bills. No matter how deep the love is, it would it will not cover your rent, groceries, and financial responsibility forever. One day, love will get tired. You have to build your own income, your expected income, to match the level or above the level that love is giving to you, so that anything that happens, you can sustain that level.
It's a— love without financial wisdom leads to destruction.
Leads to this action— disaster. Love can never pay all the bills forever. That's very deep. A lot of people get confused. A lot of people get confused and they think because the person loves them, this is going to continue. The bags, the shoe, the perfume, the gifts— it will end one day. So you must provide for yourself above the level that you are receiving love. The spending of love, the expenditure. What love gives you might not be forever. For some few, it's possible, but you must increase your income to the level that you are receiving. Number 2, love cannot fix a broken relationship. Do you know that love cannot fix a broken relationship? Love alone does not substitute for leadership for relationship.
Love alone cannot keep a relationship.
We accept the relationship is built on 3 levels. Just loving somebody, loving this person, loving that person, is not enough to build that relationship for a long and a lasting relationship. Relationship is built on 3 levels: mental level, thinking the same, you think alike, you have the same thought pattern, you like the same thing. That's powerful. Love is built physically. You're attracted to the way their body looks.
There is a fire in your bones when you see this person.
Love is also in the realm of the physical, but the strongest love is the love that is built on the spiritual. There is a spiritual connection.
There's something greater than loving each other. There's a commitment. There is a lineage. There is a, there is a value, a spiritual value. That, you know what, no matter what this person does, because of my relationship, my spiritual relationship, because of my relationship with God, with what I believe, I'm able to hold that relationship.
I'm able to learn how to forgive.
My heart is— has the ability to forgive because there is a greater cause, a greater relationship than relationship I have here. That is the only way, because love is not enough to fix a broken relationship. Number 3, 10 things that love will never do for you. Number 3: Love cannot make you stay, and love cannot make anybody stay. Somebody who does not want to be in your atmosphere, around you, cannot be kept by your love. You cannot love someone with all your heart— you can love somebody with all your heart, but if they choose not to stay If they choose not to stay, there's nothing you can do. Love on its own is powerless when somebody does not want to stay with you. People stay because they want to, not because you— not just because you love them. That's okay, but it's something greater than the love you're releasing. Maybe it's the love they're also releasing. Loving someone is not enough to keep the person, to think the person will stay because you love them. Loving someone is freeing them to live, to breathe, and to walk in the love atmosphere that you have created. But if they cannot see it, if they cannot see it, you cannot make them stay there. Love yourself enough so that you don't have to worry about loving somebody who does not who is not excited about your presence.
Love is not enough. It's not enough.
Number 4, love. 10 things love, love will never do for you. Love cannot change someone who does not want to change. I meet a lot of women, people, men say, I want my wife to change, I love her, I want her to change. Your love is not enough to make make somebody change. They have to make up their mind, determine that they want the change that you are sharing with them, you are offering them, you are helping them. So don't think because they love the children, because they love you, they will change. They will not change. Love doesn't transform a toxic behavior. Love does not, does not fix a disrespectful person. You cannot love somebody into being a better person. Not possible. Love cannot do that. Because you love somebody— 5 is important— what love— you understand what love cannot do. Love cannot— love cannot replace respect. If the man does not respect you, if the person you are in love with does not respect you, you need to abort that relationship because If someone does not, if someone does not love themselves, no matter how much you love them, no matter how much the love comes from you, it's void. So make sure you encounter, meet people, you connect to people that love themselves, because you cannot— number 5— you cannot love somebody and think because you love the person, it replaces respect. Relationship without mutual respect will eventually fall apart, no matter how much love exists. Respect is is fundamental. Love is the decoration.
You cannot love somebody and because of your love it replaces their respect or disrespect for you.
Number 6, one thing I found out as I talk to people is that love cannot heal deep insecurity.
Do you love me?
Show your love. You're doing doing every single thing for this person, but he cannot feel your love. Don't, don't, don't bother yourself. Love cannot heal deep insecurities. If someone does not love themselves, no matter how much, how much love comes from you, is a wasted effort. Self-worth comes from within, not from the external love. Very important.
Number 7: Love is very powerful, but love cannot erase the past, a traumatic past that you don't want to let go.
You don't want to let go. Love can support healing but cannot undo the pain of the mistakes in your life or the mistakes in the relationship. A lot of people don't understand that I'm sorry requires commitment. To accept that story. Love cannot erase a traumatic past. Someone who has cheated on you, it takes grace, takes help from God to let it go, because love in itself alone cannot heal the past that you don't want to come out of. Number 8: Loving somebody— love cannot guarantee success in business life. In growth, personal growth, love is not enough. You need, you need work, you need strategy, you need discipline to succeed.
Say, because I love you, I love you, I know you will succeed.
No, love is not enough to make you succeed. Work is required to walk the thing, faith to put action to it. You can't love and lie in bed. You can love but go to work. Love in itself cannot guarantee success. Very powerful. Number 9, 10 things love cannot do for you. Love cannot fix a marriage without effort. Love is important in a marriage, but It requires daily effort, forgiveness, commitment to get this love to a place. It's not going to work automatic. You have to put effort. Love, love cannot fix a marriage without effort. Love cannot replace compatibility. Two people can love each other deeply but cannot be completely— and can still be completely Eh, incompatible. They don't share the same value, vision. They don't share the same lifestyle, the same matter as much as the love.
Love is powerful, but it's not magical. 10 things love cannot do for you.
