Episode 146: The Biotech Networking Playbook Part 2 – How to Make Meaningful Connections at Events

Unless you're James, the best networkers are not always the loudest people in the room.

Holla! They're actually usually the ones paying the closest attention.

You're listening to BIO from the Bayou, empowering biotech leaders with the tools, assets, and expertise to improve healthcare outcomes.

Each episode provides insights and information to expand your network, advance your product line, and help your company thrive.

Serving the entire Gulf South, but recorded in the heart of New Orleans. Welcome back to BIO from the Bayou. I'm your host, Dr. Elaine Hamm, the Executive in Residence at Tulane School of Medicine, and with me I have my co-host for these few episodes.

Hey, howdy, howdy, howdy! It's James back from the San Diego coast.

Yay! Well, we are in the middle. I'm sure you already listened to the previous podcast.

Of course, if not, go back and start. Do not start in the middle. Well, you can if you want. Do what you want. Bring yourself joy. Let's start with podcast one.

The first episode of this series, we talked about preparing before networking, of the importance of creating a dossier of that event and knowing who, what, why you are there and who's gonna be there. And, and now let's talk about when you actually get there, you've done all the prep, now you've walked into the room, what's next?

I think, you know, you're there and despite how some people, you know, I'm constantly genuine. I tell people that, they're like, oh, you're kind, you're funny, you're this, like, oh, I'm genuine. I'm also, Exhausted when I'm exhausted, a little more tense when, you know, maybe I'm not in love with what's happening. But I think the goal— it's a nice way to say it, right?

I'm sorry, I couldn't get over the fact that you said that you were kind. That's weird. But, you know, hey, I do believe that. I know I am hateful. That's true to my brand. Hateful.

I do think, though, that the goal in the room is not to perform. It is to be present, as you and I always talk about, is to be there, which is what the preparation gets us to, is The ability to be in the room and be present. And how would you distinguish that, like, from performing and being present?

That's really hard because you've done all this prep, so you're kind of chomping at the bit to like want to get your objectives done so you can leave and take your Spanx off and drink good wine and not conference wine. But honestly, the first thing that you have to do is to pause and realize that This party isn't about you. I always pretend, and then—

I have a story for that after you get through this. I can't wait to tell it.

Well, party, I say party very specifically because that's the biggest way I approach every networking event in that I pretend that I'm the host of that party. And part of that isn't just to accomplish my own goals. I know I will. I've been doing this so long that I will get my goals accomplished no matter what, but I survey, when I walk into a room, I survey of like, Who's there, what's the layout, and who I need to meet. And then sometimes the easiest way is to just start. Don't wait for people to come up to you. No one cares. And in fact, there's probably a lot of people in that room that are very nervous themselves. And in fact, I try to target those people because they're begging for someone to come up to them.

They're open to a conversation, right? Yep. Yeah.

So I look for that person that's looking around. They look awkward. They don't know what to do with their hands.

What happens if you see a mirror?

Exactly. It's me. I don't know what to do with my hands. A million percent. I mean, we're so used to having our phones. It's hard to know what to do with our hands after. I mean, of course people will have a drink in their hands. I try not to drink or eat during receptions just because I don't like to chew in front of people. And it prevents me from really, again, like you said, being present. I'm thinking about the artichoke dip and not the person. Then I've missed the point of why I'm there. So I pretend that I'm hosting a party.

Mm-hmm.

I make sure that I bring people into the fold who's feeling nervous is a good first opener.

So, yeah, you're focusing on being interested in them versus being impressive with what you've done. And that's where, you know, I think listening over pitching is huge. And that's where I wanna tell one story from the past.

And yes, do.

You weren't in the room for this, but one of my former team members, and, uh, at a place that I will not name, we went into a meeting at BIO once with a very large strategic. And, and this person proceeded to just rattle off a list of stuff at the partner, and it, and they were very new to their role, and you just wanted to impress them with everything.

Sure.

And it was one of my favorite, most like one of the most intelligent women that I've ever met, but also a little more demure in how she approached things, a little more thoughtful and respective, both culturally and personally. And at one point, after about 15 minutes, she reached across the table, patted his hand, and said, you're very good at making lists, but can I tell you what I actually want? And I think that's an important thing to remember, that once you're in the room, yeah, pay attention. It's not just about the prep is great, but don't over-prep to the point where you're not present.

Yeah, absolutely.

You have to listen over pitching. I mean, listening is part of it.

Well, and If you listen first, you can refine your pitch. You can tailor it to that person. Oh, they care about this. I mean, I remember talking to someone that was at a family office at your reception in San Diego, and I learned that they invested in an endometriosis diagnostic. Well, that little nugget I filed away, and later in the conversation, it's like, interesting that you invested in this. So that's something we— I know I actually knew that diagnostic company and I can bring that into the conversation and talk to them about that investment. And then naturally it ate into my own pitch about my company working on an endometriosis therapeutic. So listening can really help you make your pitch land, be more connected to that person.

So you can tailor it without seeming calculated, which is super important. I mean, really it comes down to respecting their context and why they're there. And I think often people forget that, especially when it's companies approaching investors, Or approaching large strategics, they forget that whoever's on the other side of the table also has goals and objectives. And you need to learn those and figure out how do we meet in the middle? Or if you can't, save each other time and they will respect you so much more and just say, hey, I understand there's not gonna be a business deal. It was great to see you. Would love to have a drink later, but if you need this time back, let me give it to you. That will get you another meeting. And those things are important in the room. Yeah.

Again, this isn't just about you. It's about everyone in that room. They have their own things that they're worried about and objectives that they're trying to accomplish as well. I think that leads to another sort of objective. I mean, I love when I see people I know. It's great. They could serve as an amazing touchstone throughout the party, a little respite, if you will. I love getting adopted by extroverts. I've even used that line of, you know, are you extroverted? I need adoption. You are my good extrovert, you know, person that can go and introduce me to people.

Um, oh, extrovert, but true.

You're ambivert. You're a bit of both, which is, which is fantastic, but Finding the people you know is helpful, but God, you don't want to spend a whole networking event talking to the same people that you already know. Why on earth would you do that? You put on a bra to go meet new people. Don't waste that time talking to people you already know unless they can introduce you to somebody that you do need to know. And that's a good way. Hey, it's good to see you. Do you know that person over there? Would you be okay introducing me to that person?

Mm-hmm.

That's an incredible way to use people that you know there, but Use it to anchor. Don't hide.

That's a great way, I think, too, to, to, as you walk, especially as you walk into a networking reception, if it's a reception versus the, the one-on-one meeting stuff, to pay attention to who do you know who's talking to somebody who you might want to meet? And you don't interrupt them, but later say, hey, I saw you talking to them. Would you mind making a quick intro and saying, hey, I'd love for you to meet Elaine. It's funny because you and I love to spend time together at events, but I think this year at BIO was the least time we ever spent together despite hosting Reception together because we were each out doing our goals, but we paid attention to what each other needed and made some connections back and forth. Like, hey, and later when I was at a different event, I'm like, get over here. That person you wanted to talk to, they're here now. You were in your room and done and you're like, all right. But it makes sense. And it's the buddy system is huge on how you meet new people.

Well, and at the, I mean, also be the connector because then people will remember that. I mean, so when at one of those receptions, I remember Rafa from Jeanne Alice, who's been on this podcast and you've been on his, is a really good connector. And he said, hey, I know you're in women's health. You need to come meet this person. And he brought me over there and that was so very, very helpful. But then Rafa became helpful to the person he was introducing me to. That's another piece of it. Some of those lesser-known tips are like finding ways to introduce people to each other. There's a great book of like how, I think it's called How to Talk to Anyone, and it has like 92 tips. Some of them are okay. Some of them are really, really helpful of like learning ways to introduce people in person and also post, which we'll talk about in the next podcast, making someone beyond their title. So introducing someone with a tidbit about something that they do and they're training for an ultra marathon, or they're in women's health because they lost a family member to ovarian cancer, something that really anchors at a good introduction. Beyond just like, hey, this is someone you should meet. Okay.

Why?

Become a good introduction maker. And that comes not just connecting people and connecting dots, which you're amazing at, by the way. It's like, hey, you're working in this, that person's working in this, and then you pull them together. Oh, magic happens.

I remember all that, but I don't remember the names so often. Like, I am the worst at names despite remembering what somebody was wearing and where we were standing and what food they were eating when we met 5 years ago. And so, it's also that, that, hey, this is Elaine. And, you know, having that person pick up and be like, oh yeah, hey, what's your name? Which is helpful as well.

Thank God for name badges, honestly.

Exactly.

It's the thing that I'm really the crappiest at, honestly, is remembering names. I will, like you, remember like, oh, they love Chipotle, but I will not remember their dang names. And it can be really hard. And that's one of my things I have to work on. But, you know, there's a lot of great conversational tips that you can use to make things less Awkward, to be honest. So like introducing people, introducing yourself, don't just say, I'm Elaine and here's my job title. Boring as hell. Say not just, you know, what your job title is, but what you do. And that's your pitch that we talked about earlier. And you also—

Where, where are you from? Where do you live? Like things like that that make people more human allow you to find a connection of some sort, usually.

Definitely. Especially you mentioned the where you live. That's a great Great point. And you, when you say like, I'm from Oklahoma or I'm from New Orleans, you add a little tidbit that people can glom onto. Give people fodder to carry on the conversation. I'm from New Orleans. Have you ever been there? We have amazing jazz.

My favorite is leveraging your husband, our other Ian in our lives, because sometimes I see somebody drinking wine, I'm like, hey, have you met Elaine? Did you know her husband is a James Beard finalist sommelier? You might want to pick her brain on that. And all of a sudden they love you. Yeah.

And then they want to talk to me about wine. I'm like, no, no, no, that's my husband.

I don't know anything about wine.

You wanna give people something that they can grab to, and that's really important. So practice like how you introduce yourself, not just your pitch, but something interesting. And in that book, the 92 Ways to, or 92 Tips to How to Talk to Anyone, whatever, I'll put that into our show notes. There was something that I was already doing that she called a what's it. It draws people to you. And a what's it is something that you have on you.

Oh, your glasses.

Yeah, it's my glasses. I've been doing it for years. I've been wearing crazy-ass glasses that started because I kept losing them. And then it became a signature and it also became a conversational opener. It gave someone an opportunity to make a comment. Oh my God, I love your glasses. And then I can go into a whole story about glasses, but it can be a brooch, jewelry. We're so lucky. I wear jewelry. I usually get my jewelry from art museum gift shops and I can say, oh my God, I got these in The San Francisco Museum of Modern Art, have you been there? Or we can talk about art. Like it leads off into so many little different little avenues that you can go down, but you're offering that fodder for them to do. You can also bring a book. I've seen that as something that people have done. And then you can talk about the book, but sometimes it comes off weird and dirty. So, you know.

Especially if you're at a cocktail reception.

Yeah. But if you're at a conference and you have something that you have related to the subject, you could do that. Have a what's it? I mean, it's such an easy way to lead into something.

Those are great ways to prepare. I have you. You're my what's it?

Oh, oh, oh.

That's so weird. No, I mean, you know, I always have, you know, I pretty much always have like crazy socks. You know, I have my multicolored cheaters that are nowhere near as exciting as yours, but they usually coordinate with my outfit.

But they're beautiful.

Yeah. And, you know, so a little, a little bit, and I'll change them through the day. Often the first time people won't comment, they'll be like, Your glasses are a different color. I'm like, yep, I got 3 pair in my bag. I just like to change them up and see if people notice, which is a fun thing, which I kind of stole from you. It's not the same, but it's adjacent. But I do think too, you know, there's the entering, the contributing, but exiting conversations is also hard because, you know, those people, like, do not be the person standing there talking to somebody and scanning the room to see if there's someone better. Don't.

I know it happens, but if you do see the person— yeah, well, if you see the person that you're talking to doing that, Let them go, honey. Let them go. They just aren't that into you, or they need to move on because they're there to network and you've already monopolized their time. So that's your cue of paying attention and listening and being present that they're scanning the room. Get out. You want to leave in a good light. So, um, how do you leave a conversation?

I mean, I think a great way to do that, I think it's to say, we both have a lot of folks to meet here. I'm really enjoying this and I want to be respectful because I know you have people to catch. And I don't wanna monopolize your time, but I'd love to continue this. Let's catch up for virtual coffee later. And I think it's honest, it's warm, and it gives you the ability, especially if you wanna have that follow-up, the ability for that follow-up where you said you were going to. And, you know, hopefully they've said, yeah, let's do that. If they haven't, yeah, die a little inside. But, you know, when you like me, I like you. Here's a note. I wanna send you a thing on LinkedIn and we'll see if we have coffee. But, you know, those kinds of things, I think. Open it up and allow you then to have your great follow-ons, which we'll talk about in our next episode.

There's lots of little lines you can practice, simple as like, I'm gonna go get a drink, can I get you anything? Although sometimes you'll have to come back. I think the other thing is like, I want to meet another founder. I have a goal. I like to tell people my goal for that conference. I have to meet 3 other people. That is my goal. And then I get to go home to my, my hotel room or whatever. And people usually get that and they go forth and sometimes they'll actually help you accomplish that goal, which is even better. So. Practice. There's lots of phrases that can help you leave very gracefully.

So, yeah. I have 3 more things I think we need to hit, so I'll give you the choice of what order. Let's talk about unexpected encounters, managing energy, and taking notes. Which would you like to tackle first?

Ooh, you know, that's a good question. I'm gonna say like, save the notes for the next conversation, the next podcast, because that's sort of the aftereffect. I think the unexpected encounters. Because you're really good about this and I avoided them for far too long. What do you mean, first of all, unexpected encounter?

Those are the ones that happen outside of expected meetings. So hallways, elevators, coffee lines, people beside you in the airplane, those moments matter. And it's why, while I dress for comfort on airplanes, I'm usually in like a super nice t-shirt and jeans. I have a linen jacket on when I walk on that I take off and fold off. Because it has business cards. I have sat beside like the VP of Lilly or AstraZeneca. Because if you're going to a conference or leaving a conference, you're not done working.

No, I did realize that.

Like, don't be in your, don't be in your ripped hole Spanx and that, you know, have something that can look professional.

But no one should be seeing my Spanx on an airplane. That is, that's a whole other problem if that's what's happening. You should be knowing that I have holes in my Spanx. But I agree, I am not one of those people that enjoys talking on an airplane. But once you know that you're at— you're going to that final connection to your conference space, you have to assume that people are on the airplane going to the same darn thing and take advantage of that, or at least don't look crazy.

But not too much advantage because they're also traveling. They're probably getting ready themselves. And so especially if you're on your way there, they're also mentally prepping. If they're on the way back, they're also exhausted. No, I'd say talk to them, but, you know, just say, hey, great to meet you. Can we trade cards? Would love to set a follow-up, especially on the after. On the way there, you'd be like, hey, we have a, or I'm going to this reception, which I can maybe get you in. But, you know, work those things and use those unexpected encounters in different ways potentially as well.

I mean, elevator is a good one. You know, hey, are you at the same conference? Awesome. How's it been so far? Great. Do you have any restaurant recommendations? I mean, it can be a number of different things. I don't usually like to bother people at the airport, especially on the day that the conference ends, because don't talk to me anymore. My face hurts. But sometimes that can happen and you have to be prepared for it. But also it comes to that other piece you mentioned, matching energy. If someone looks exhausted at an airport, leave them be.

Don't.

Yeah.

Leave them be. But also pay attention in your hotel gym as well. One of my best connections came at a conference. It was in, I remember it was in Chicago, and myself and the person in charge of all academic relations at that point had decided to skip a session and go to the gym. We were the only people there and just started chatting. And it was one of the best connections I ever made because we're both just, we're on the ellipticals beside each other and chatted for like 2 minutes, traded cards. That was it. And we had great follow-up because we both decided that a workout was important.

So you, that you would, I wanna make so many jokes about you making connections at a gym. I'll keep my mouth shut and keep this as a professional podcast.

All right. But all right. One thing you just almost alluded to, Elaine, that was matching energy and managing energy. How do you do that? Because I know you, your energy will go quickly in big rooms or days of meetings. So, so how do you do that and how do you gauge somebody else's and how you should respond?

It's body language. I mean, and getting outside of yourself. Again, this isn't about you. This is about other people as well. And so, like, the scanning of the room is a big indicator that they're done with you. But if they are looking tired, you know, like, hey, do you wanna sit down? Let's go grab a seat. That's a great— I did that at your party, actually, of like, she, like, tell she didn't want to stand anymore. Let's go sit down and grab a seat on the couch. That type of thing can continue the conversation, but respect that person's energy as well. So.

Yeah, I think those are important things. And also it's taking time for yourself in the middle. And the days are long. Sometimes they're 14, 16-hour days. And I remember, um, Kay Genamaris, who worked with us for years and is off doing amazing regulatory consulting now, but Kay would go find a quiet corner and just sit.

Rock herself.

She would put her head down so no one would talk to her. And just kind of take 20 minutes between meetings and have silence because she needed that to be able to hop back in. And it's okay to do that. I think it's okay to communicate, you know, knees up on the floor, head down, like, I'm tired, do not talk to me. Because at those events, you have to let people know, nope, this is not the time. And Kate was very good at that, that she popped back in and you would never know that she was exhausted.

Yeah. Maybe a tip, it probably goes more along the prep side, is that I have a playlist. That I put on before I go to a networking event because I have to—

I did not know this.

Yes.

What's on the playlist?

It depends. Right now I have K-pop Demon Hunter. I don't know. It's just, it's fun and it gets me in a good mood and it puts a smile on my face and it's really fun to walk to. So as I'm— I used it in JPM. It was great because I'm walking to a lot of meetings and I just had like a little pep in my step. I was smiling. Looked approachable because I, I was in a good mood, honestly. And so like, I have a whole like, get you energized, go make money. And this is a whole sort of different theme depending on my goal of that networking event. But in general, it just, the goal is to make me more comfortable and energetic and that I have the energy to do what I'm about to go do. And if need be, I can go listen to it in the bathroom if I need to get jazzed up again. But it's something that helps me quite a bit.

I just pull up whatever pops in my head. Like, I don't have a preplanned playlist. I usually have whatever song is in my head at the moment.

Yeah, you will listen to a song until it dies. I mean, like, you will listen to something like 50 million times.

I have a theme song of the conference that I'm just like over and over. And thank God it's on AirPods and not other. Now, the last thing I do want to touch on, and you said to hold it, but I think it's important for this part as well, is taking notes. Not reviewing your notes, but taking notes. And I take notes because I don't remember anything. And if I write it, I do remember it. Although I often can't go back and read my writing, I have a chance at recollecting because I wrote it down. Because that's— I think that comes from the generational bit too, where we were taught to write, handwrite things versus keyboard, or, you know, type, or, you know, take notes on your phone through AI. You do 20 back-to-back meetings, your odds of remembering what happened—

You're not going to remember.

Slim to none. No, I'll remember this. And 3 meetings later, which person was that? And also, that's where you can write down, hey, they wore a blue shirt that I really love. Like Andrew from Merck, remember? He wore that gorgeous blue shirt that you and I both commented on. We're like, oh, Andrew, gorgeous blue shirt guy. And he came to one of our events once and he said, I wore this shirt for you two because you told me you liked it. And those things help you stand out. Oh, I see. And it helps you remember what some of those moments were. Like, people will be like, statement glasses, Elaine. And then they're like, who was statement glasses girl? They go through like, oh, Elaine. And I'll put those notes. In my phone as well, where I can go in Notes and search statement glasses and get like the 2 people who wear them. Like, nope, it's not that one. And then I can go to LinkedIn, like, it's that one. Yay. And then you know who they are. Like, I will do that across rooms, be looking up notes on my phone.

100%. Well, and if you're at a partnering meeting, you can make your dossier be your note taker as well. You're taking notes. I know that you think you're going to remember. You're never going to remember. Just write it down. Business cards. I write on business cards. I get really sad when people have digital business cards because I want to write on them. Red shirt. We talked about these things and my follow-up is this. And also I have a lot of hats. What hat was I wearing when I talked to them? Was it Tulane? Was it my company? So I have to put those on there or I will forget immediately.

And my business card tip is always carry a fine print permanent marker in your purse or in your jacket pocket, because that will write on any business card. If it's glossy, it still writes where a ballpoint pen will not write on a glossy one. Um, that's why. I don't know if you noticed, I know Ian knows this, I would always order a box of fine tip permanent markers before I went to a conference so I would have them with me. If I lost it or it went away, I had another one in my pocket.

I love that. That's really, really good. That's a good system.

Helpful hints from Hello Louise or Jimmy Z.

Business card holder, also very good to have, especially when you're working with countries where business cards are a big part of the culture. So don't just shove it in your back pocket. You want to put it in a really nice business card If you have multiple hats, you can have multiple business card holders. And then I have a system of pockets in my briefcase. Briefcase, that's not a thing. I have a system where I put the ones that I'm receiving and then I have my old, my other ones in there. And so like you have ways to kind of remember like where your stuff is going when you're in the networking event itself.

So. Yeah. Speaking of systems, we have a system where our producer Ian beats us up when we go too long and he is giving us the, you are way too far signal. So we gotta wrap up.

I know, I know. This is the problem with us is that we talk too long and you actually want me to have short podcasts. I just want to talk forever. Okay. Let's talk about the closing exchange. So the networking theme is about presence, right? Any other sort of themes you want to touch on?

Maybe, you know, to be curious in the moment. And as you and I always talk about, to be adaptable in the moment, because it's never going to go the way you thought. I shouldn't say never. It is more than likely not going to go the way you thought it was.

Yeah. All the prep in the world can sometimes just fly out the window, which is a little disappointing, but some of the prep is coming in with adaptability and I love that curiosity. We're scientists. We are known for curiosity. Become curious about people, and that makes this so much easier. And that's what a good host of a party does, is they're curious and they want to make sure their guests have a good time.

So, and after their guests have a good time, they have to do the cleanup, which is our next podcast, Elaine. The cleanup.

Oh, I like that. That sets us up for the final part. What you do after the party.

ChatGPT didn't even write that. I came up with that on my own.

Oh, look at you. You are human. Well, that leads us to a nice closing part of what we're going to be talking about our next podcast, which is going to be how to follow up and make the most of your networking. Join us at our next episode of Bio from the Bayou.

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