S3 E10 - Overcoming Insecurities to Fulfill Your Purpose

There are two clues that you must know regarding your purpose. Are you living in your purpose? Let us show you, tell you and explain those two clues right now in this one of a kind episode of Broke Tour.

Two more clues that someone is living in their purpose. Let's talk about those for all of our beautiful, amazing, and incredible listeners. How would someone know?

Well, the last clue was that somebody would never be able to pay you enough to put in all the hours, focus, or be willing to do the things that you are willing to do to bring this into reality. But you'd also be able to do it if they never paid you at all. So. So, for example, that's so cool. You know, you can own a beautiful private island and live in the most amazing place in the world, but choose to go on these missions and sleep in the dirt, being eaten alive by mosquitoes and having, like, terrible food and, you know, da, da, da. That's not like a brag. That's saying, that is my passion. Like, that is a purpose that is, like, so wonderfully fulfilling and exciting that you cannot wait to go do it. You can't wait. You wake up at four in the morning, you stay up all night packing, and it's so much fun. And that's one of the things I love about Jeremy is my husband, Jeremy. I'm married to Jeremy, guys, is that, you know, I found somebody that can be here and present before kings of nations, but also sleep in the dirt and hold my hand. Like. Like, we love doing both of those things together. And so it's really nice to have a partner that has same passion and purpose.

Yeah.

So that is. That is one of the things we were. We were in Kentucky. No, we were in Louisiana, and we were sleeping in this building. It was like, in this basement, and it was, like, so hot. There's no showers. There's no. Somebody filled our little portable shower with gasoline. And so, so terrible, the whole situation. And we just looked at each other, we're like, God, we love our life so much because we got to help re roof this little old lady's home. And she was just, like, crying, and it meant the world. So it's just. That's the kind of thing. But I do want to disrupt a thought. You know, I've heard from a lot of amazing people that you just wake up in the morning amped and ready to go, and, like, you just have so much excitement every moment of every day. And I. I feel like we talk about this a lot, but life is not an Instagram highlight reel.

Right.

Like there I. I'm living in my purpose, thankfully, so much every day. But that doesn't mean there's not a long list of crappy parts to it.

Yeah, I mean, we were talking about this right before the episode started. I was like, britain, hold on, hold on. We gotta. We gotta record this. Because that was my second clue, essentially, of your living. Your purpose is like, you wake up amped, right. Every day. Like, you're just jacked up, ready to rock and roll. And you're like, wait a minute, hold on, though. Yes, that's true. However, what about those days that are tough? What about the random operations of a business or your life that are just stressful and annoying and you are the only one that can handle it?

It's. Nobody else can, or it's too expensive for somebody else to do it, or your business can't figure it out, whatever, depending on what level. So I think there's a lot of people out there, you know, confused, thinking they're supposed to wake up jacked every day, and then they wake up two days in a row not jacked, and they're like, that's it. I'm not living. This must be wrong. It's a sign. And I'm like, no, you have to be willing to put in the work. I think about the people that participate in the Olympics all the time. I think about them, like, every day. I think, how many years of preparation and how much sacrifice did they make and how many friends did they not have or trips did they not go on? To be able to have that one moment of the potential to be the best in the world, and that's a lot like living your purpose. Those people, of course they're living their purpose, probably most of them.

Yep, yep.

To be able to get there. But they're Every minute. I'm sure they didn't feel like practicing every day.

Correct.

So you have to think through, are my activities rolling up into my purpose? And am I finding peace and fulfillment and joy and meaning in the journey towards that Instagram able moment? You know, because there's a lot of sucky things that go on in owning an island. There's a lot of sucky things that go in. Go on. On trying to prep for one of these trips. I mean, there's so much. So I don't want anybody listening to this to be insecure. When you have hard moments or hard days or difficulties that you have to overcome, it's still all part of the journey, and it still makes you better.

It still makes you Better. Yes. Bring that on. I'll give clue number three. So we've shared two so far. And the waking up. Right. That is one. But it's the realization of it might not be every day.

Yeah.

Brittany is saying, like, you're going to have time. If you're an Olympian, you're going to be sore.

Yeah.

You're going to want to sleep in that day.

You fall on the ice.

It's okay. Number three, this one's a little bit of an interesting one for me. This is harder for me, easier for you. But it's listening to that inner voice. Right. Being able to hear the voice, being able to know what it is, what it sounds like, and recognizing when you hear it, is it an expansion or is it a contraction? Right. Do you feel internally, this intuition when people say, listen to your gut? That's what this is talking about, by the way. That's this part when you're like, listen to your gut. It's an intuition.

Listen to your gut.

That's true. Amazing. That was perfect. When you're doing that, is it an expansion? Almost like a balloon. Svetlana and myself were talking about this last night. Do you get led by this bright energy internally that's pulling you, or is it this contraction that hunches your shoulders over, that makes you force, that makes you push? And when it comes to a decision in that purpose, when you get to ask yourself, do I want to do this? And if the answer is absolutely, you're pulled immediately, it's, yes, I have to achieve these things. If it is a continuous push, maybe not.

Question, hit me. What if you're massively insecure about that thing? You know you're supposed to probably do it, but you're just really insecure, and so you feel that withdrawal, like, where. How do you know the difference between that.

Yes. So the insecurity is the part that you know you have to do it, but you're afraid of it because you're scared of a particular feeling. So for me, and this is where you excel, is.

The C word, confrontation. I brought this up before. Right.

I excel at this.

Brittany's bossy in a beautiful way.

Such a gift.

Such a good gift.

The gift of bossiness.

Such a good gift.

I want a better word for it, but that's.

We'll come up with one, I'm sure, in the next episode. However, that confrontation, when I know this is it, but I'm insecure about. I got to step up and. And project or be or create this answer that other person might not Want. They don't want to hear this, and I know it.

Oh, my gosh, I could just see your guts inside. I want them to love me.

Yeah, but they're not going to like me anymore. That's so many people. So listen to me, my friends. That's probably you. If you're listening to this, you might fall into that category where it is an insecurity, but you know know it's an insecurity. You're aware, you know the correct answer. You were expanded and pulled towards that. But the pushing, like you mentioned, is not the. For some other people, it might not be the I gotta push past this part. It's. I have to be pulled past that insecurity that I know I'm not gonna be great at. For some of you might be a public speaking, a presentation that you know you have to do in front of someone. The opportunity arises. The place that you need to be, you're there, you're at it, but you're scared.

Oof. That's a good one. What if I don't perform well, that's helpful. I think I've figured this out for myself, which is I've got the best team. I have always been really nervous on camera. Super nervous. I'm nervous right now.

Yeah, you are.

Why? Because there's a camera.

Why?

And I don't know why it's there. It's always been a thing. And so my team and I decided we needed to make these videos for something that was a couple years ago. And I had these, like, young 20s girls working for me. And I just like. We started filming and I was like, that's it. Can't do it anymore. And I went in my office and they pulled my own trick on me and I was like, dang it. They said, all right, Brittany, here are the five best things that happen to the world if you do this. And then here are the five worst things that happen to the world if you don't do this. I mean, they're so you gotta make em really extreme. So sometimes you have to sell yourself on overcoming your own insecurity. And you have to really take that aerial view and say, hmm, Instead of just engaging on this feeling, what are the repercussions if I do or if I don't? And then you can make a conscious decision to override the emotion is. If the emotion or energy that you're engaging in isn't serving you, drop it. If. If you need anxiety to force you to finish that paper. If you need anxiety to force you to Call somebody back, because you know what happens if you don't? Then it's a helpful emotion. If it's not serving you and you're getting lost in it, then you need to drop it.

That's genius.

That was super helpful for me, especially, like, as a woman, we really count on our feelings to guide us, but sometimes these feelings can be wackadoodle and not helpful. And so I had to. Again, okay, there's this. A useful emotion.

That's the next dog I'm getting, by the way, is a whack. A doodle.

I knew.

Yeah. I'm just letting you know.

The piece that. The takeaway for me from that is how many individuals will take the time to write that out. Because that's what Bernie said is her team wrote it out, showed her you sitting down and picking your five best things and your five worst things. If you do or do not do that action that you're insecure about, my friend. It can be a totally different approach. It can be totally different insecurity. For example, Brittany, as you mentioned, and she's mentioned this numerous times, she gets nervous on camera. She knows that, though. She's aware of that. I have zero nerves in front of cameras.

However, because you're a model.

No, never. Never.

It's your modeling history that makes you confident.

All the modeling experience I have, however, Bruni has zero nerves with confrontation. Is that true? Like, you have none?

No, I still have it. But if you need practice in that area, just become a project manager on Two Houses and you'll be fine after that.

Got it. Love it.

Note to self, Two Houses, project manager. You'll lose your butt on the first one, and you'll lose your butt on the first half of the second one. And then you'll realize I have to figure out how to be confrontational.

Love that. Okay, there's a project for me or.

Just be a girl in construction, period.

Either one. Yes, yes. But like I said, those are two different, totally different insecurities that both you and I will face. You have to know which ones those are. And you can get a team like you mentioned to surround you, to help you with that. That's absolutely okay, my friends. You can have someone that can propel you in those positions in those times that maybe you're insecure, maybe you don't feel amazing about it. That does not mean that you're not walking in your purpose if you are fully aware this is my purpose. I just have these fears, these insecurities, and these anxieties.

Is it required that's one fun thing. I loved learning from Richard Branson as he said, brittany, I am very introverted. And I was like, really? And he said, my mentor taught me to do these crazy stunts to get PR because my company needed it or my company would never be known. And I said, so you don't just think of these on your own. He said, no, my mentor taught me, this is what I do. I was like, very interesting. And also hearing Tony Robbins come up on stage and say, hey, I used to be an introvert. And I was like, yeah, right. He said, but my calling required me extrovert tendencies and to be loudering, to be confident on stage and to speak, to be more open and to be around people. And so I love that.

No matter what is natural to you, if the mission and purpose are primary on your life and you realize the importance of it, you've got to adapt to whatever that is. So if my ability to reach more people requires me getting on camera, then I'm gonna have to find ways to suck it up and just be able to be more confident. If I ask myself better questions, okay, why the freak are you insecure on camera? What happened to you to make you nervous? Like, what happened? And you can actually. There's always a reason because you're typically not crazy. And so you can dive into looking at that reason. Say, is that really valid now? And then start asking better questions. And again, tying that purpose, that why to overcoming that. If Jeremy just let anybody and everybody walk all over him and he had some poison come into his company that was destroying it, if he did not have the bigger mission of what you're looking to create and all the lives you're going to change enough for him to stand up and get that poison out of his company, then what is the devastation? And so one thing that I love about Elon, I know he's really tough on his team, but his mission is not his staff. Sometimes this is super helpful. People who are social ventures listening to this. Like, if you have a huge heart, check it out. You want to run a company, you have to pick. Yes, be kind and loving and empowering to your team. But if your team isn't the official mission, then you have to, like, make sure your team aligns with the mission. So if somebody gets in the way of him occupying Mars, they've got to go. But if your company is taking in people with, you know, dangerous backgrounds, let's say you're hiring ex prisoners and somebody acts up, that is like. But your mission is to employ ex prisoners and create jobs for them. Like, you need to have a tolerance policy and peace people in place to be able to help that person because that's your mission. So having that level of clarity will allow you to be the leader that you need to be and not. You know, it was hard for me because I had some people really acting, acting up bad in the beginning. And it was like, well, why would I care about this if I can't help my own people? It's like sometimes you hand people opportunity and they want it. They're acting up because they want to go. They're just too scared to say it. They want you to fire them. They want to get out of there. And so hand ups, not handouts. You can open the door. You can't make people walk through it. And that opportunity might not be right for them.

What's the most loving thing you can do to that person long term?

What is the most loving thing you can do for that person?

Stole that and give you no credit. Put on my Instagram. No quotes, no.

Dang it.

What is the most loving thing you can do for your company long term? Most loving thing you can do for your mission long term?

Yes. Think about that. And I love how Brittany used the word align, ladies and gentlemen. Right? Align your team with your mission. If you are a business owner, you want to be a business owner. Keep that in mind. What is the mission and if the person is not aligned with that. There are others. There are other people.

Vote them off the island.

Yeah. By the way, fun facts. Just I want to compliment you on your British accent the other other day. Your Richard Branson impression was fantastic. You know, it was quite splendid. I hope you guys took know that more impressions to come in season three of Bro Woke. We love having you here. You guys rock. We'll see you in the next episode.