S4 E10 - RelationSHAPES

Are you even aware of the power of your relationships and are you learning how to be intentional with them? We're going to be discussing how you can do that in this episode.

We're talking about relationships. Brittany Faith Turner, how relationships will shape your life.

Right.

We just had a great chat. I think that was one of the better episodes we've ever done personally, because it's such good, useful, tactical information for all the dudes out there.

You know, I love that.

So tell us about the caliber of relationships. How does that change the calorie of your life?

Absolutely. That is everything. I mean, we've all heard you are the average of the five closest people you spend time with. And I know in previous episodes we've talked about you being the average of the five closest ideas you spend the most time with, which we're going to hit on more throughout this season. But how does the caliber of your life and how does the people you spend time with truly start to shape and become different when you are more intentional with that? And I think if I were to look at, from the time we've started this podcast to now, I've understood and done the same exercises that we talk about a lot in season two, which is how to achieve whole life success by writing your eulogy, making a one page plan vision board, but then really starting to execute on that. And my life right now is a result of executing on all that information that we cover. And now I teach in GeForce entrepreneurs. So it's 12 weeks essentially of classes that teach you how to shape your life so intentionally that you can achieve whole life success. And you build your businesses, you build your relationships, you build everything from that place of clarity. And so when I really started executing on that with this new vision, a bigger vision of seeing what's the possibilities of my life, because I recognize how much need there is in the world. And it's not even like, look how great Brittany is. It's saying there is so much need. What do I have? How can I use this? And how can I just, instead of flopping around or drifting, do the intentional work to attract those people into my life, keep them and work alongside them. And so again, before people just pick a mentor, a lot of people, oh, this will be a good mentor because they're rich. It's like, no, how did they get rich? Why are they rich? How? What are they rich in? Do they, you know, cheat on their wife and go do all these terrible things on the weekend and that's kind of how they got ahead? Or did they build a successful force for good company. And so my current mentor is Naveen Jain, who I adore and think is amazing. He's my neighbor here in BVI and he came to America with like $5 in his pocket from India and then sold his first company for like 40 billion. So he's just the most amazing thinker in the world. And I feel so small around him. But that's good. The smallness is not something he's making me feel. He is very encouraging and he says, brittany, I know you can do so much more. Have you moved the needle of humanity forward today and or with your business? If not, why are you doing it? And I just love that he thinks I have that capability. He's the first person to speak that life into me. And the fact that he's doing it resets the standard of what I think is possible for my life. So that's a great example of why did I pick him. You know, his dad died of cancer in front of him. And when he saw that his dad didn't have to die, but they didn't have the medical treatments available in America because they are not incentivized to heal people. They're incentivized to keep people sick. Yeah, I said it. He said, how do we create a new standard for this entire pharmaceutical industry, for the health industry, for the health professionals, by getting people to understand there's actually a market for keeping people healthy. But let's put that power in the people's hands first to where they demand it. So his tagline for his new company, which is called viom, is, is imagine a world where illness was optional.

Yep, that's the one.

And that's really the way his brain works, is you gotta start with imagining. And in my story, for those who know the ups and downs of my journey, it gets hard to dream if you've had a lot of loss or if you've had a lot of heartbreak and you told people that things were gonna happen and they don't. You get scared to dream and, or get scared to dream publicly. The. But the common denominator of all these billionaires that I've been spending time with, the people who truly are industry changing and industry leading entrepreneurs, is they are excited to dream of those possibilities. They are not embarrassed to just talk about things as if they were going to happen someday. And they're not worried about sounding crazy because their friends and the people they keep around them spend time just imagining too. And so if you give yourself that permission, start spending time with Other people who are willing to look like crazies before they're labeled a genius later, your world's gonna start to change. So I've been spending a lot of time with people who are resetting the standard of what's possible. Everything from women that have done just so much that I now believe somebody who looks like me can do those things. And it sounds dumb. Like what does it need to be a woman? I don't freaking know. Sure, I don't know why it has to be that way. But for some reason it's just extra helpful when there is somebody who looks like you for some reason. If you haven't seen it done before, there's some weird intrinsic limiting beliefs there. And so really enjoyed spending time with high level women and or these people changing the world as we know it. Thinking about what do they focus on? Even reading about somebody like elon Musk. So 2020 richest man in the world, it's announced, Elon Musk, richest man in the whole world. Richest person. And then his response was, well, that's weird. That's weird. Back to work. And that's when you know somebody is using their business as their vehicle to change the world. Richest man in the world working how many hours a week do you think?

90?

At least 90? Yeah, at least 90. Getting after it does not have to work anymore. But this is his purpose. And that's what I love sharing, especially in GeForce entrepreneur is get clear on you get clear on what matters most to you in your one chance on earth and how you can express that purpose in your outer world, your inner purpose in your outer world through the vehicle of your business. Before you go starting a business because or, and, or getting a job like I'm not. I don't think starting a business is for everybody. But especially if you're going to start a business and deal with that level of stress and headache, don't just say what can make money. Because I refuse to teach people how to scale anything that they may want to jump off a cliff on later. Because scaling is doing nothing but expanding everything from the good parts to also the hard parts. So again we're talking about who you're spending time with that shapes your life. It's everybody from your mentors to your circle to what you're listening to, to the podcasts that you are listening to now, to your significant other. Again, I don't think people should go sign up to get married to somebody unless they have taken the time to get clear on what matters most to them. And go and even the direction they wanna go in life.

That was the number one biggest change in my life, was getting extremely clear on the woman that I wanna have in my life.

Right? And it's not just like, she's nice and pretty for me. I had to say, where do I wanna end up in my life? Because if you're finding a life partner, then who's actually gonna be complimentary to that? And who can I be a partner with on their journey? You know, if I'm dating a golfer, I think that's great that they are disciplined. There's a lot of respectable skills there. But I did data golfer. That's why I'm sharing this amazing, wonderful that they're disciplined, they want to be the best in the world. But I did not resonate with wanting to do that life. I knew and prayed God every day, please help me find somebody who wants to save babies even more than I do. And I cannot believe. I mean, I believe it now and I had the faith for it, but I have to, like, pull him out of the field because he'll put his own health at risk trying to save even more and more and more babies, because we get to do that now. But again, it takes that clarity before you sign up and do something like start a business or start a community group or get married or do anything big in your life. Have that level of clarity.

How have you shifted the people you've spent time with since last season?

One of the things that I've heard me say out loud in a few different situations was that I'm not great with macroeconomics, the big, big economics. What moves? How does supply chains, how does crops, weather, seasonality, all those things affect the world. So I went and started working with a guy by the name of Dean Ennis. He is a dean, good old Dean. So he's an economic specialist. He's an economist. And learning from him, learning, being in his webinars, being in some presentations, being in his mastermind, speaking with him on stage, in public, you know, doing all the things. When you're talking about the shifts for me, what I do is I track down what am I not great at, what I need to get better at, right? What do I need to study? What limiting beliefs do I have? I have a lot of political limiting beliefs right now. And so I went and got a political specialist, right? Or someone who had a lot of experience in that world. Her name is Chauncey.

Yeah.

As you know. And now we're talking about not only shifting different types of mentors but also she's a beautiful black woman. Most of my mentors up until that stage were shocker white men. So now you're starting to really shift. Different polarities, different demographics, learning from different beliefs, different opinions, different backgrounds, different country. Different country. Precisely. And so it's really wonderful for me to just know. All right, here's some chinks in my armor. Here are some things that I can spend money and time to get this knowledge and get this wisdom so much faster.

Right.

And when I did that, every kind of huge doors and revelations opened up. I mean, working with Chauncey was one of the best.

Who introduced you to that, Jack?

What? So who did introduce me to her? Great question. So at the top of this list of mentors that I wrote down is this woman by the name of Brittany Turner. And I still view you as a mentor, by the way.

Aw, that was so kind. I still view you as a mentor.

Because you have so many things that I. Well, obviously this podcast, the whole reason I started it was because I wanted to learn from you.

What?

Yeah, of course.

Tell me that.

Yeah. Aw.

Well, it's not like I'm trying to get credit for introducing you to Chauncey, but you paid to have a ticket to get in the room.

Yes.

And when you were in the room, one of the speakers was Chauncey. Was Chauncey. And she rocked your world. And she told you you're supposed to go into the political game. She could sense that all over you. She's incredibly good at that. And she ends up being our amazing Love Summit speaker. She's incredibly gifted. But it took you being in the room to identify greatness. Now, getting in the room is the first step. Getting around people, that's a reoccurring thing. I keep hearing from you is like, I found where my weaknesses were. I found the people who were excelling in them, and I found a way to get around them. And so some people aren't professional coaches. They don't have, like, a coaching package you can buy. What other, you know, values driven services can you be providing these people? And when Paulie. You know, I really wanted to learn from Paulie how to rehab houses. I didn't have any money to offer, but I knew I had time and energy. And I would literally sit there and listen to his problems, take notes, because he wouldn't tell me. He doesn't ever ask for help, which is so frustrating, and ask myself, how can I make this man's life easier so he'll keep me around? Pro tip, especially for Busy entrepreneurs. You make our lives easier. We will keep you forever.

Yeah.

And for the employees of the people who are working for these busy entrepreneurs, you make their lives easier. They will celebrate you, keep you forever. You keep throwing and dumping more problems on their plate. You don't even know the level of stress that they carry. And it might look like they've got it all, own it all, have all these wonderful things. All those wonderful things did come with a price and a sacrifice. But not every day is perfect. And watching Richard Branson go through Covid with a launching that year, launching cruise line, hotels, transportation, music festivals. I mean I can't. Gyms, I can't think of a virgin company just off the top of my head that was not massively impacted. His entire brand is people, people, people, people, people being around people, people doing things together, people having fun together, people traveling. Yeah, all the things. And I watched this, you know, 70 something year old billionaire who's made it.

To the top, who's almost got six pack by the way, guys ripped.

Yeah, we'll talk about that more later. Like who has made it to the top however many decades ago, almost lose everything. Yeah, honestly, I don't know. I mean he, he made a lot of sacrifices to be able to not lose at all. He sacrificed literally his baby. He sold his massive share in Virgin Galactic to survive it. He had to like put the island up as a backup collateral too. Like my point is even though you look like you have it all and people do have it all, it's still at risk and they still carry it all. And they're still the one that goes to jail if it doesn't work out. And they're still the ones that everybody hates on as soon as things get tight. Everybody wants a raise when things are good, but they don't want to take a pay cut when things get bad. So all that to say find a way to create value and these wonderful amazing people who can stomach that. God, the stress will keep you around. And that is something that I've been looking for lately is why have I been afraid to take the next big step? Because I've always been afraid. It's not like I haven't. I've been afraid every step of the way. And that's why I live by the word courage is like do it with diarrhea like we've talked about before. How can I be around people who've taken these massive steps, afraid and dealt with massive problems. Like I got this island. The grand opening date was 4-1-20 freaking 2020 the day the borders closed for nine months. Stomaching that and thinking it was going to last for two weeks and it essentially affected the nation for almost two years. That was hard. Being around other people that have stomached really difficult things is important because stress is a tolerance. Just like people can drink and drink and drink and be okay. You can raise your stress tolerance level and perspective is huge. Having a perspective that gives you an edge is critical, I believe, for being able to do big things. And I know we're going to talk about that more in the next episode. But one of the biggest things that Richard recognized is in doing that is I cannot deal with this level of problem if I don't have my health. Right, you don't have your health. You really don't have anything. And one of my new favorite quotes is health is the crown on a well person's head that only a sick person can see. And that, my friends, is absolutely true.

You mentioned that. We're going to talk more about gaining an edge when you have that perspective in the next episode. So, ladies and gentlemen, we're going to see you there, where I will also give every single listener the pro tip of all pro tips when it comes to adding value.

Oh, yeah.

I'll see you there.

We've got lots of requests for coaching. If you want to be coached by myself or J. Money Newsome, you in real estate, in stocks, in how to live fulfilling, abundant, purpose filled lives. Go to broketowoke.com and click Sign me up.