Empowering Authors: Navigating Self-Publishing Pitfalls

Welcome to this episode of the Unnoticed Entrepreneur with me, Jim James. And today we're going to help you to understand about self publishing and the number one mistake that most entrepreneurs and business owners make when they think about writing a book. We're going to go to Alberta, Canada to talk to Lisa Sohan, who is a publisher and she has a business called Next Page Publishing. She's also going to explain to us why she only works with female authors. Larissa, welcome to the show.

Thank you so much. Pleasure to be here.

It's a pleasure to have you. You're going to help a man like me understand why you wouldn't want me as a customer. We're going to talk about that in a little bit. You're also going to help us to understand why you think that nice girls don't have to finish last. And you could tell me whether you think nice guys do finish last later. But let's start. Larissa, you have built a six figure business coaching women who want to be authors. But why is it necessary? What mistake or mistakes are people making when they want to write and publish a book?

A lot of times when people jump into the idea or they've been told their whole life, oh, you need to write a book, that story makes a fantastic, you know, journey that you need to walk someone through. And they're like, okay, the hard part is going to be actually writing the book. Once I get past writing the book, that the, you know, the hours spent in front of my computer, the sore back, the cold coffee, I'm going to be okay. The book will come out and it'll hit the right people, it'll get on the shelves, it'll sell out. I'll be a New York Times bestseller. The work will be done. That is one of the biggest misconceptions that authors have and, or want to be authors have. And the industry unfortunately preys on that. They, they bank on you thinking the hard part is done with the wr and then it's just smooth sailing from there. So when we, when we hear about vanity press, yeah, they want you to think the heart. You've done the hard part. You just let us take you the final 10% and publish your book and give you a snazzy cover and then you're good. It'll be perfect. Smooth sailing. When in fact, it's kind of like a sprint that turns into a marathon. If you go into this race, this becoming an author, assuming a new identity, thinking that I just have to write the book and then it's going to be okay, well, you're going to get to the 5 kilometer mark, turn the corner, and realize you still have. This is fast math. 37km left to run, and you're exhausted, and you have no support network. You didn't bring your water bottle. You don't know what to do. Your shoes are untied because you've only been focused on the sprint.

Larissa, you're absolutely right. As you say, people think of it as a sprint or almost like, you know, giving birth to a child. Actually, it's just the beginning of parenting, isn't it? Right? The. You bring the baby home from the maternity ward. That's the beginning. Right. The first nine months are actually relatively easy. What should people think about when they are looking at creating a book? And how do you overcome the issue that most people feel as though they haven't got a marathon in them, would probably not even start on the journey of writing a book if they thought it was going to be so arduous. I'm going to move away from the parenting analogy there, by the way, and stick to the running.

Stick to the running. It is a lot like bringing in a child. And it's probably more relevant about bringing in a child because you are proud of this thing when it comes out of the womb and it's on paper and you are so invested in it, and you wanted to see it do really, really well. And then you partner with a vanity press, they push it out, they give you a beautiful cover, and they're like, bye, bye. And now you're sitting at home with this baby, and you don't know what to do with it. And the workaround for that is always thinking, like, right from the very beginning, the moment you make that commitment, I'm going to write a book who is my reader. It is always all about the end person. A lot of times, us as authors again, we can get really consumed in the idea of, like, this is hard on me. This is my emotional journey. I'm telling my story. But really, you're telling your story to connect with someone. That is what you're trying to do. That is the end goal. And so at every step along the way, whether you're in writing or editing or design or at the dreaded marketing phase, if you're thinking about that one person that this book is meant for, you will never lose focus of why you're doing what you're doing.

I think it's great. I think that often we talk about starting with why, but actually think we need to start with who and who we're serving rather than why we're doing it? Because the why sometimes can change, but who we're focused on and the benefits we're going to give those people really, really can keep us going. So, Larissa, what would be the right strategy? You talked about focusing on the who. What would be some of the phases and some of the practical tips that you would give somebody that has decided to bring that baby home from the warden and is going to grow and grow that book?

Yeah. So starting with the who. And I think your point to the. To the why versus the who. If you don't understand the who, can you really understand the why? Like, do you really know why you're doing what you're doing if you don't understand who you're doing it for? So that's. That's just kind of my. My point there. It's why. In our programs, we start with the who, and actually, the why is second. So I'm really glad you pointed that out. That's exactly how our programs are structured. Now, as far as fast action, tangible advice. If you're always thinking about the who, you need to start studying that who. It's not just like putting a picture up on your wall and being like, that's Amy. That's who I'm writing for. It's, where is Amy hanging out? What time of day is Amy ready to receive my message? What does Amy need to hear to want to buy from me? And when you understand your. Your Amy that well, the outline becomes crystal clear. You know exactly what you need to write to talk to Amy. You know the language that you need to talk in. It takes out all of the guesswork of, like, I don't know how to structure this sentence. I don't know how to what stories to tell. You don't have that doubt because you're, you know, Amy almost better than you know yourself. And I do want to be clear. Amy can be you five years ago, but you have to be real. Like, a lot of us think, like, oh, if only I had known this five years ago, if only someone had told me. We're so ready to believe that five years ago we were ready for that information. When likely.

If.

If you told five years ago, me, like Larissa, that I was going to be starting a publishing house, I'd be like, are you insane? Like, what? No, I'm not. So it's okay to write to your past self, but you have to be really realistic about what that past self is ready to hear.

Larissa, now you've mentioned here about Amy, as opposed to Eric. You only work with female authors, entrepreneurs, coaches, subject matter experts, and so on. Why do you discriminate? Is it you think us men don't have anything worth saying?

Okay, so you even said it before we started talking that I was going to be a difficult guess, that I was anti men. I'm not anti men. I do have male clients. My first client was actually a man. He was wonderful. I have a client right now who's writing about sobriety for men. So I'm not exclusive. My motto in our company is we work with women and a few good men. And so as long as you classify as that few good men, where you're open to being emotionally vulnerable, you're open to connecting, you're open to seeing other perspectives and points of view, then yeah, we're going to be a perfect pair. The. The. You know, The. The methodology of us only working with women, a large part of it is relatability. And this, a good example of this is. Let's say you had a topic written by a man and you had the exact same topic written by a woman. They are almost identical. They. They base it off the same research paper. They base it off the same experiences, except the topic is women's equality. Which one are me as a woman, am I going to lean towards more? It is not the one written by the man. It is the one written by the women. Same content, very different real life experiences. And so part of being an entrepreneur is knowing who's going to relate to you, is knowing who you are going to be capable of. Capable of attracting into your circle and maintaining healthy relationships with. And it's not that I can't do that with men. It's that it doesn't happen as naturally with men.

Okay, that's.

Go ahead. Sorry.

No, no, that's an interesting. There's no. Actually, there is no word for women hating men. Like we have misogyny. There is no word the other way around. Interesting enough. I don't know why. There probably should be, really. You talk there about, you know, women and sharing emotions and men being vulnerable. Too many people write a book as part of a sort of a sales and marketing strategy, an authority piece. You've touched on something very interesting, which is this, you know, need to be vulnerable in order to create an association and affinity with the audience. And yet you also want to be an authority in order to sustain the business part of the value of writing a book. How do you reconcile these two? Larissa?

Mm. Yeah. So a huge part of my origin story. If you've listened to me on other podcasts, if you've read my website, my bios. I suffered a miscarriage in 2021, I believe. And as a result I had a huge mental health crisis. And, and for a long time I was, I was hospitalized, I almost missed Christmas. Like I, it was very, mm, traumatic to say the least. And for a long time I was really ashamed of that story. I was really scared to put that story in the world. I didn't want to anyone to think I was weak or less than or selfish because I thought a viable route out was suicide. I genuinely believed that. And when people hear that, they're like, how could you leave your daughter? How could you do that to your husband? And it's, and, and it's not about that, right? And once I realized, once I did start talking about it in like close knit friendships and, and then eventually to some of my clients and stuff, they're like, you have to share that story because hashtag metoo, right? And it's, it became, it became the foundation to who, to who I serve and who I connect with. I have people coming to me off of podcasts like this, being like, thank you for saying that. Losing a child at any stage of a pregnancy is undeniably one of the most significant events a woman can go through. And yet we are told over and over again to keep it to ourselves. That's between you and your doctor. You don't want to trigger someone else. And once I finally stepped back and said, no, we need to talk about this. Women need to know that they're supported no matter what, that they didn't fail, their bodies aren't wrong, they didn't do anything to make this happen. It is a fact of life. Why should we not talk about it? And once I realized that that huge vulnerable part of my story was what was going to make my business into what it was by giving permission to other women to use their voice this way and to come together as a community and to lift each other up. That became the foundation for my whole business. I have an entire brand built on community, on networking, on celebrating each other. One of our mottos, we have a lot of mottos in this. In my company, there is no competition, there is only community. No one is going to do it the way I do it. And I can guarantee no one has a program like I have. That means that my program isn't meant for everyone. I know that. But it is meant for someone. And so the part of being vulnerable is Understanding how it invites people into your business. And if I share my story with confidence. And we always have agendas, right? Like, my agenda is to get people to understand their voice means something and that they have the power to talk about it. Well, how do I convince them that if I'm not doing it right?

So there's an authenticity there, Larissa. So. And who I'm talking to over in Alberta about bringing our own personal story. And thank you for sharing that. That is brave of you to say that. And you're. As a father, the idea of losing a child at any stage is beyond. Beyond even consideration.

But.

So you've managed to make this almost the hallmark of what you represent as an organization and helping those people. Do you think men have the permission to be equally vulnerable in public and write books of a similar nature? Or is this the preserve of women who to some degree, are given more permission socially, aren't they, to discuss it amongst themselves and increasingly with people like yourself, discussing it publicly?

I think that's a great question. And in my business, I absolutely do give men that same space that I give women. Like, I was talking about the gentleman who's writing his book on sobriety right now. He cries at almost every one of our sessions because there is the space and the permission to do so. And I know he feels like a weird man. Like, he feels out of place. And same with my husband, too, who is very emotionally connected, is very emotionally mature. I look at. I call him a unicorn because he doesn't do what a lot of other men feel that they can do. And I. Unfortunately, no, I don't think society has given men the permission. Same permission, you know, suck it up, be a man, grow a pair. That is what they were raised on. And I do think it's starting to shift. And I do think a large part of it is the feminist movement of, like, hey, we are allowed to cry, and so are you. And. And. And it's leading by example, too, right? Like, I have a daughter. She's six. And she sees my husband get emotional, like, healthy emotional, Not. Not irate, not angry, not, you know, punching walls. He sees her, or she sees him sit back and say that he's thankful and that he loves us and that he shows up in this world. That is just as empowering for her as a little girl going out. And while right now she's got crushes on boys, but whatever her future is, she knows what to look for in a healthy man who's been raised with the ability to show his emotions.

Wonderful so I'll take that as permission for us men. And I also have shed more than one tear in public, so I'm definitely part of that community as well. Larissa, as an entrepreneur, changing subject just slightly because we've talked about it's giving permission to ourselves to be authentic, whether that's wearing our heart and a sleeve as you're doing, or at least to give insights into how we are feeling as much as what we're doing into our books and that we can translate that into part of a business proposition as well. As an entrepreneur, how have you then built this brand which you say is really around a community? Some people find it very difficult to ask for money in a community because if we're friends, how do you profit from those people? Explain to me how you've made Next Page Publishing into a six figure business. And as you said before we started, in fact, that you really aren't using much social media. So what are you doing to build the business?

A huge part of it is relationship building. And I actually don't really talk about my business with friends and family. I do try and keep those very separate because the relationship is different. So if you think about, I am well into my 30s at this point. Up until now, I've been a corporate employee. I've never sold anything besides Girl Guide cookies. Like, it's, you know, it's different. If I were to switch that narrative in my relationships, in my family and my friend relationships where I'm suddenly asking them for money, that can put people off, right? Because you've never done that before. And all of a sudden they can't understand it. They don't know how to show up. They didn't. They didn't ask for that relationship to change. They liked the way it was. And so a huge part of my growth. I used to get really upset when my parents didn't respond in my business the way I wanted them to. Like, I tell them, like, hey, I just signed a new client. They'd be like, cool, Are you making money? Like, that was their number one concern. And it was like, yes, but I'm also changing lives. Like, I'm connecting with people. They didn't get it. And I had to realize that it wasn't fair for me to ask them to get it. They never asked to be brought into this world. That was my decision alone. So I had to make the decision to keep my friendships and my family relationships separate from my business and then expand my business network. Once I started to understand that those personal relationships were not Business relationships. I could really create the foundation for what a business relationship relationship was going to look like. And my number one rule is I never ask my business friends for discounts. I never ask them for free stuff. I never asked them to give me free tickets to their events, anything. If we do something, it's a mutual exchange of value, and that creates that foundation of, I don't ask it from you, you cannot ask it from me. That's not how this is going to work. And it just creates that permission to approach this like business women. We are business women. We are here to make money. We gotta feed our family, we gotta pay our bills, and we know what we're worth. And one of my red flags is when someone comes to me and be like, hey, can I get. You know, hey, I shared your post. Can I get 50% off your service? It's, like, hard. No. And that's not the transactional relationship I'm looking for.

Larissa. So you talked about sort of showing up and being very present in your community and at events as well. We talked before we started recording about nice girls don't have to be last. What did you mean by that?

Yeah, so a lot of men and women were raised on the adage of nice guys finish last. Like, they don't. Like, they don't get the. They don't get the pretty girl at the bar. They don't get the promotion at work. You have to be savage. You have to be hard. You have to be cutthroat. You gotta be a little bit of a jerk to climb that ladder to get that girl. And I have built my entire business on being a nice person. One of the things that I do when I'm sad, like yesterday, for example, absolutely terrible day, on the cusp of a time change, hormonal mood swings. Everything was wrong. I went to a restaurant, and I complimented. Like, I took myself out for lunch, took myself on a little girl date, and I complimented the server. I said, you know, your hair is gorgeous today. Like, you're bringing it for a Monday. And her face lit up. And you know what I did in response? I lit up. I was happy. And then all of a sudden, my friend showed up at the restaurant, and I was happy. And it just. If I had gone out to lunch and I had been sour and angry and mean to my server, well, I would have ruined my day and hers. But I chose to be a nice person, and a lot of my business relationships have unfolded because I've just genuinely been a kind person. I've complimented people. I've said what I like about them. I've talked about what my values are and it attracts those people in that have the ability to light me up in return.

Larissa, I love that and I think that's really inspirational that you could be genuine and as you say, be yourself and trust that good will come. I will ask you, as you know I do the slightly embarrassing question. If there's a mistake that you've made as an entrepreneur with the marketing, I'll assume that it's not being nasty to anybody because you're plainly such a nice person. Something you've done that hasn't gone quiet as planned that my fellow unnoticed entrepreneur should should not do.

Yeah, I'm going to talk about one specific I've made a few mistakes. Don't get me wrong. Building this six figure on its way to figure business has not been without road bumps. I will say that every single bump I've come across has lended me the ability to grow and in a lot of cases teach me what I don't want to do in my business. Which is just as good as knowing what you do want to do. So one of the ones is in the very beginning of my business I signed with an $18,000 group coaching program out of the state. So that's US$18,000. So for me that's more like $25,000. That was my startup budget times four. And when I got into the program I, I went full in like I, I did all of their pre recorded video modules. I went to every single group session which was like six in the morning for me because they were based out of the like they were across the world. Their time zones sucked for me. But I showed up and the number one red flag for me should have been in the contract. They said you cannot post anything negative about us. You can't say anything about us on social media without or anywhere without our written permission. Red flag because once I got into it and I realized I was just a drop in their pond, they did not care about me. They had one style of teaching. I left after three months in an 18 month program and I said this is not for me. I didn't even bother. Their contract was airtight in all of the wrong ways. I was never going to get a penny back. The battle of going through it was going to be worse than just cutting my losses and moving on.

Ouch. Eye watering amounts of money. And it's always kind of disappointing that some people are treating writing a book as we said at the very Beginning as an industry rather than as an expression of value and contribution to other people. Larissa Sowen, you're plainly doing this very differently. If there was one piece of advice that you would give us, you've come a long way in a short amount of time. Credit to you for that. What would be the one thing that you've learned that you'd share?

I know you asked me this before, and I can't remember what my pre scripted answer was, so I'm going to wing it, which is even more exciting because I don't ever know what's coming out. So when I started this business, I had a huge mindset around I have to be different than everyone else. I cannot do. And so when I found somebody that was doing something dissimilar to me, I would get really discouraged. I would get really down. And I find that with a lot of authors too, they come to me and they're like, yeah, but there's so many books in my niche. Like, how can I possibly stand out? I can't go up against these big names. And it's. And the biggest reframe I've had in my business, the biggest lender to my success, is understanding that the number one thing that differentiates, differentiates me from everyone else is me. It is not my programs, it is not my services. It's not even my clientele. I target female entrepreneurs looking to grow to six and seven figures. Well, so do almost every other coach out there. Like, that's not unique. I am unique. I am what makes this company unique. My methodologies, my mottos, my approach to human interaction. And once you drop that limiting belief that you. Your topic has to be unique, your teaching style has to be unique, the world opens up. The possibilities are endless.

Larissa, that's kind. I will remind you that you said we would talk about being in your zone of genius, and I think we. We just witnessed you being in your zone of genius, which is, you know, you being you, which is fantastic. Before we ask you how people can get hold of you, Larissa, So. And over there in Alberta, a podcast or a book that you would recommend.

Yeah. So for aspiring authors. I do have my own podcast. It's called I wrote that I bring on guests from all different worlds into marketing, publishing, editing. That's a great resources resource. But for a book book that I've recently read, and I always go recent because my memory is like zero. It has to be recently. So this within the last like six months that I read this one, it's called the Comfort Zone by Kristin Butler. And it's all about in this day and age of where everyone is like, growth, growth has to hurt. You have to be uncomfortable. You have to step outside your comfort zone. Kristin is much more in line with my methodology of like, no, I need to be comfortable so that I'm ready to grow. I have to be able to come back to my comfort zone so that I can sit my coach, because I have a coach. I need a coach just as much as everybody else just told me the other day. She's like, I'm in an expansion hangover right now. I've spent the first three months of this year growing at incredible rates. Now my body, my mind, my soul are tired. And so I'm coming back to my comfort zone. What feels good. And so Kristen Butler, she just nails that topic. Her book is beautiful. Beautiful cover, beautiful interior. It's great book, wonderful.

And if people want to get hold of you, Larissa, so and how can they do that?

You can find me on our website is the best. Like I said, I'm not the most active on socials. So next page, publishing.net you can find us there. You can find all our programs, our blogs, our podcasts. Everything is there, including how to book a call with me one on one and talk about what happens inside our VIP packages of publishing that really take the author from just a book to a full ecosystem that supports their entire business, their entire legacy.

I think you're building a legacy there, Larissa. So. And thank you so much for joining me on the Unnoticed Entrepreneur show today.

Thank you.

Well, I love the authenticity and the transparency that Larissa's brought to us today. And I think this idea that you should pay a fortune to get your ideas published, that's really food for thought. Don't pay a lot of money to get a book published because you're going to need a lot of money to market the book later. So save some of your funds and save some of your energy because this really is a long distance episode in your life. A long distance chapter, I should say. If you've enjoyed this episode of the Unnoticed Entrepreneur, do please rate it and leave a review on your player. And until we meet again, I just encourage you to keep on communicating.