Joanne Smith argues that people blame ordinary stressors like kids' ages or promotions for unhappiness, then wait for those things to change to feel okay. Your brain treats this belief as a command, locking you into waiting. Instead, acknowledge life is messy and choose to be okay anyway.
So yeah, things that might be deemed as a stressor may be a trigger, but they're not necessarily the root cause of what's going on. And many people who start believing that, not start, who have got an ongoing belief that they need to change their job or they need the kids to grow up, I need a lot of— this is a common trend of what a lot of people I talk with are like, oh well, at the minute It's impossible because I've got kids of this age, but when the kids are this, it'll be this. Or, when I've got that next promotion, or when I retire, or when this gets sorted, or that gets sorted. But again, that's actually unintentionally creating a dangerous message to yourself that that can be interpreted by the amazing processor, the brain itself, that I can't be okay until this happens or that. And it literally does respond to all of our thoughts, everything that we believe and think. The brain goes, got ya, got ya, we can make that happen. So if we're living and believing that until I achieve X or Y or Z, I'm not going to be able to have any respite or relief, then unintentionally we might have ordered that. But if we start giving a better message of, actually, I know things are not perfect, but I can still be okay when chaos is happening all around me,
