Angelo Sisco - The 4 Pillars Of A Bulletproof Business Mindset

Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.

What's up, everybody? You're listening to the Hustle and Flow Chart podcast with your boys, Matt Wolf and Joe Fear. What's up, everyone?

Yo, we're back.

Welcome back to the Hustle and Flowchart podcast. I'm Matt Wolf.

I'm here with Joe Fear and the usual.

The usual. I'm here with my usual co host.

Yeah, no one will co host. Yeah, good luck with that, bro. I'll put you in a headlock and, you know, punch you or something.

Dude, watch the aggression.

Just kidding. Too soon. It just happened not that long ago.

Just kidding.

No, that's actually a very relevant joke to the conversation we're having today. We're talking to Angelo Sisco.

Who?

How do you know Angelo?

I know Angelo via my good buddy Ryan Buccintini.

Who, your personal trainer coach, Correct?

Yes. So they are buddies, and Ryan works with Angelo, and. Yeah, that's how that's happened. So Ange is just an amazing dude and a storyteller, as you'll find out from this podcast. And it's a very colorful story, which is amazing because you could see kind of this whole trajectory, and I'm sure a lot of people can relate to the story, at least at different points. And then towards the end of this thing, we really break down this new mission, this focus, this just being like, this character that Angelo is turned into and. Or as I guess I won't even say turned into a transition. He always was, but he just had to kind of discover himself. And he walks us through so many different ways that you can do the same if you feel like you're kind of held back with something in your life.

Yeah. I mean, I would say this episode sort of broken into, like, two parts. Right. The first part is Angelo's story of how he got his first gems off the ground, which freaking blew me away. His stories and how he did it and just sort of the bootstrapped off the wall, out of the box. Thinking he did to, like, get it off the wall actually is pretty relevant, but.

Yeah. Well, how about even paying off cops?

Well, let's.

Yeah, I know. I'm not gonna. I'm not gonna. But, like, he even did some crazy things. He didn't break any rules or anything, but. Or maybe he didn't. He just didn't know. Yeah, you'll. You'll hear it in the story.

So that's part one is kind of getting this story of how he grew these gyms and built all this success there. And then part two we actually talk about the sort of like, you know, mental barriers and physical barriers and spiritual and emotional barriers that people have to getting going in business. And then we break down some actual practices in each of those sort of four pillars that you can implement in your life to be more physically strong, mentally strong, spiritually strong and emotionally strong.

Nailed it.

Pretty cool stuff. I also nailed it because I'm able to see the screen.

I set you up. He thanked me.

Yeah, I did.

Or Angela for that beautiful website of his, which it is. Very beautiful. Yeah. So Angelo, I mean, it's going to take you on a journey and it's going to be fun. So he is the man at Alpha Hippie. He has a great podcast called Alpha Hippie and a whole bunch of other things. You'll hear it all mentioned in the, in the show. And of course, check the show notes. So as we always do with every episode, we're taking notes for you. So all the action steps, all the cool little details that you probably miss if you're just listening and driving and all that fun stuff, we got your back. So just go to evergreenprofits.com comp, C.

O M P or also hustleandflowchart.com comp.

That's true. I always forget we have two ways to get there.

Does the evergreenprofits.com actually link there?

I don't know, but I hope if that doesn't work, go to us on fletcher.com comp or we'll just do a redirect.

Yeah, I should probably make sure that link works.

Yeah, we'll figure that out. But go hurry over there. Sometime within the span of time you're listening to this when it released, ideally in about a week, it's free for you to go snag that thing.

Yeah. If you grab it within a week of it coming live, then you can get the notes for free. Outside of that, they get locked into.

Our vault, the big vault that's in Matt's office.

And if you want to get access to that vault of notes, go to EGpletter.com and get everything. Then you can get everything, get all of the backlogs and notes. That's also how you can support the show. You know, one of the things we talked about doing was doing listener supported show where you can, you know, donate a certain amount of money every month to help support the show. And we went, nah, we don't need no donations. Screw that. Let's actually give up something of like insane value for supporting the show. And that's why we created the EGP letter and brought that back around was we wanted to create an insane value way for you to support the show. So go to egpletter.com, learn all about that. But in the meantime, hustleandflowchart.com comp to get the notes for this episode.

Without further ado, let's go over to Mr. Angelo Sisco. Hey, Angelo. Welcome to the show.

Oh, so happy to be here, guys. Thank you for having me.

Yeah, man, you're very welcome. And yeah, you've been waiting for a while. We booked this sucker a long time ago. Yeah, thanks for being patient, dude.

I get it. Protecting your time and having things set up at the right time and just timing in general just matters so much. You know, the difference between getting things done well and just getting them done.

Dude, that is so. It's so true. And that's some. I know I've struggled with that a long time. For a long, long time is protecting my own time. And yeah, the second you, like, create a little bit of white space and get a little systematic with stuff, you're like, oh, I can breathe, like a deep breath, not this chest breath that makes me all anxious and shit.

Yeah. I mean, as we record this, I actually just got back from a three day vacation in Palm Springs, and that was the first time that I've pretty much been completely checked out of the business for more than a day at a time in probably four years.

You got to do that more often, man. Yeah, and so, like, yeah, we met you. I met you first, you know, through good buddy, Mr. Buccantini. Ryan out of. He's, you know, he's been training me still to this day with. Started with CrossFit and now it's more, you know, individual design stuff. I feel like I'm the best. I'm the best. Yeah, no, I'm the most fit right now. And I feel like, mentally too. And this is where your influence, I feel like, comes over into Ryan just to kind of give a quick, like, backstory about how we know each other. It's just really cool to have you here to go deep dive, because I know Ryan, for instance, he's just like, dude, Ang is the man, if you want no bullshit and, like, cut straight to the chase and, like, just get down to business, but in a good, helpful way. You know, I know he relies on you. So, yeah, man, let's get into your backstory because I know it's interesting and I know we're curious because there's a lot of stuff we don't even know. Sure, let's do it. Go for it, bro. So I know you had a tragic accident that kind of kicked everything off for you.

Yeah, you know what? I would honestly say it probably even went farther back from there, but. So I grew up. I grew up in a very small Italian American suburb called Melrose Park, a suburb of Chicago. And when I was five years old, my father went to prison. From when I was 5 until I was 16. And so my mother, who never really worked at the time, I have an older sister, and my mother, when my dad went to prison and she had to go to work, my mother's mother, my grandmother, she moved into the house, and she basically took care of my sister and I while my mother went to work. And that was the majority of my youth. So my dad went to prison.

When I was starting kindergarten, and he came home and I had my license. And so it's crazy to say that out loud like that. Like, especially you guys, like, think about that gap, right?

Yeah, man.

And, you know, it was a very. It was a very different childhood. I don't necessarily believe it was that difficult now that, you know, I really had a lot of great things, but it was just different. We would go visit him around prisons, around the country once or twice a year if we were lucky to, because of finances. And my father was a very big, strong, aggressive guy, and he was very. You know, now that I realize it more, he was very pissed off that he was in prison and that his family had to kind of just be out there without them. And really, you know, when people go to prison, it is. It's a. More of a vacation than being on the outside, because you just have a certain restricted life. Like, this is it. You have no other options. And now his family that he was supposed to provide for and care for, wasn't there. And my father, you know, he's an amazing man on many levels, but he doesn't have the. He didn't have the tools to really help me understand that. He just really missed me. He just gave me shit all the time for not being a big enough man and all those kind of things. So I grew up really wanting to, you know, be this big, successful man, because that's what my father really wanted me to be. And just like, before we got on, we were talking about entrepreneurship. My dad thinks it's the worst thing in the world for you to have a job.

Oh, wow. So that was, like, a catalyst for you, it sounds like, from day one, totally.

My dad Thinks my dad would rather be the guy with the hot dog cart on the corner than the VP of some company and be told when he has to do anything. My dad thinks that that's the, like, the most unnatural thing you could do.

Yeah. Yeah, I agree.

Yeah. And so that's like. That's always been there. Like, my dad calls people that have jobs. John. This is so funny. I can't remember. Johnny Lunch Boxes. He thinks it's the worst. He thinks you're.

What are you?

Johnny Lunchbox? And so, like, I've always.

Had ways of hustling and making money and mowing lawns and, like, all these different. These different things. And this has been a really big, big part of my life. I just didn't really know what direction I wanted to go. And then that took me into my teens. And I was. I had. I was a. I worked as a clerk at the Mercantile Exchange. I even traded there for a little bit with, like, commodities and futures and things like that. And in my youth, I. That was going to be my future. And now that takes me to. When I was 20. I was in a motorcycle accident. I was hit by a landscaping truck off my motorcycle. And I have 10 screws and a plate in my left foot. And all new skin on that lower limb. And I was in the hospital for two months and rehab for five months. I was in the hospital for, like, Thanksgiving, Christmas, all that stuff. 21st birthday, like, it was the worst. And so during that time as well, when I was in the hospital, I really thought my future was going to be. I was going to be a trader at the Mercantile Exchange. And that was going to be my life. So I was going to college at the time at DePaul University. And before I got in the accident, I really wasn't into it, but give me a semester and a half off of school, I'm definitely not into it. And so I really ruled that out. And I thought I was going to go back and I was going to start trading. And that was my time. And I wound up going there and losing money and not having a great experience there at all. And the environment just wasn't really great for me to be down there in that type of life. So I really didn't have much going on in my mid-20s. And.

I just started gaining weight. I wasn't working out. I wasn't taking care of myself. I was walking with this outrageous limp. I just wasn't really feeling good about my future. I didn't really have a great identity. And during this time Also my parents. My parents got divorced. And what was really crazy for me and even in my 20s, is I had such an identity wrapped around the family that my father went to prison for 11 years and my parents stayed together, and that made us successful, made us a successful family. Not realizing I didn't have the understanding that, man, could you. I mean, I couldn't imagine being separated from my wife for two months. What kind of people would be, right?

I'm surprised. They. Yeah. That's insane.

Yeah. My mother. My mother, God damn it, guys, is a keeper. My dad filed for divorce. My mother wouldn't leave you if you beat her half to death. She's an amazing woman. She's a trooper. But anyways, so she, she. They got divorced and now I have no, no school. I'm losing. I lost money trading. I'm not happy. My parents are getting divorced, and this just kind of puts me in, like, a real shit time in my life. Around 24, 25, and then I was just gaining weight. I started another business, though, in my 20s that was. That was successful. A friend of his father started a pizza place. And what we did one night, we were broke, but there was pizza slices left over and they were about to close. So we threw them in the catering truck and drove downtown in the city and sold them outside to drunks at the bar. You know, if you're in the 20 something and you got no money, but you actually want to hang out, like, you're actually out drinking, a good way to do it is just sell the drunk people food. It was just like hanging out.

It's brilliant, dude. And I love it that you're like. You brought up two different things about Chicago. It's like, you got pizza now. You said the hot dog stand. It's like, you're so Chicago. I love it.

I mean, they're very, you know, they have big characteristic or big characteristic parts of this.

At some point, he's going to work the Cubbies into the story, right?

It's coming, it's coming.

There'll be something. I go sell a pizza with my friend, and we're like, wait a second, we could go out. We don't have to spend any money. We get to actually hang out with people and we get to do this. And I was like, man, we should do this all the time. And fast forward a few months later, I had two stops in the city, and one of them was at a place called Ban V, which was the bar that Brian Urlocher, a very famous football player, owned and his Brother. And so they gave me a spot, and I would feed the valet people and the police department. So they would let me park illegally, and I would just sell pizza. And I had employees, too, that would sell pizza. We had another place in another area, and so we wound up having two trucks, and we had employees. And I would just basically manage it. And people would just leave me envelopes in my glove compartment and lock the door. And that's how I would make sure the money was there the next day. And I did that for a while, but I was still overweight. I was. So I wasn't super happy. But at least we took care of not being broke, because that's. That's. I mean, fat or broke, I don't know. They're both. They both suck, you know?

Well, yeah. I mean, what is more. And I know you have more to the story, so I don't want to stop you on the flow, but. Yeah, there's like the whole, like, you could have what the healthy, wealthy and happy. Yeah. And it's like figuring out what is the order. And money only solves really money problems, you know? So it sounded like that's exactly what you're attacking. But the health was going with all the pizza slices.

Yeah, I just totally wasn't taking care of myself. Didn't really do it. You know what, though? Just. I don't mind if we take a curveball. I like rabbit holes. I still think the money. Not because I'm greedy. I think the money just helps because the money is your access to education to figure out how to be happy and to figure out how to lose weight. Because I think people that are in positions, they don't want to be. It's not because they want to be in those positions, per se. It's because they don't have the education and the awareness to get out of those situations.

I could see that for sure. And then money is that access to exchange to. Yeah. Educate yourself and go join a gym or get some training if you need that. Yeah, gotcha. Cool.

Yeah. And so. So we. We had the pizza slices and then that right around that time, that was like 2007, 2008. There was that movie 300 that came out. Do you guys remember that movie?

Definitely. Great movie.

All right. And so that was like. That was the first movie where you saw 50 people just shredded as shit. Persians. Right.

It's a good point.

I was like, oh, damn. How did all these people get to look like this? Because usually in those movies there's one guy. Yeah, we got There because they locked him up in a cage for three months before the film.

Right.

You know, and so I started going, how do you get this many people that are all different fit? And I started looking up the movie and I came to find out that they trained at a gym called Jim Jones, which is in Utah, which is still there, and got very famous for training the movie. 300 other movies like Superman and getting people really fit, but also athletic looking and being able to move and be agile and perform certain things. And I just started doing a lot of research about them. And I was still very overweight at this time, but I knew that like I was kind of just onto something. And.

Then I found out Jim Jones was at this thing called CrossFit. And I was like, okay, what's this thing called CrossFit? And this was still the blog days where, you know, you just had people. It looked like Craigslist, you know what I mean? The website, terrible. But it was a big deal, you know. And then so January 5, 2009, I recorded a fitness test and I did it. And that was the first official day that I started doing CrossFit. There wasn't any CrossFit gyms around here at the time, so I just did it on my own. But I had so much freedom because the business was basically running itself Wednesday through Sunday night. So I got to work out all day, learn about nutrition, write my own stuff, go practice it because I had so much time. And so what wound up happening is I lost 95 pounds in seven months.

And it was amazing. And I was like, oh my God, this is so great. And so I had a whole new lease on life. And people were asking me to work out with me because all of these people in my neighborhood saw me running around doing all that and doing all.

This crazy training, dragging weird things on the street and lifting odd blocks off the road or something.

Yeah, dude, you had to figure stuff out because it wasn't like is pre rogue.

Yeah.

This was back when like they put a workout of the day up on a site and everybody just kind of went to the site to see what the workout was kind of thing.

Yeah. And you can't. And you tried to, you tried to make whatever you had to do it on. Like I would go do workouts at certain parks because they had good pull up bars. It was all over the place like.

You know what I mean? Yeah, yeah, Scrappy.

Yeah. And that's just how we had to do it. And I started training people for free. And I was like, man, this Is so much fun. Why don't I. Can I make a career out of this? And this is the funny part of the story. So I go, okay. And when I was really overweight, one of my, like, you know how, like, when people are overweight they have, like, a fat guy goal? Like a fat guy wants to go to the beach with the six pack, like all that kind of thing, right?

Yeah.

Okay. And I had like a. I mean, I think there's multiple ones, but one of my fat guy goal was is right by. By Lake Michigan. They have the lakefront and it's beautiful by Chicago. And I wanted to run along the lakefront with my shirt off. It was like, oh, man. It was like fat guy moment to the next.

I love it.

Slow motion video. I was really hoping you were gonna say you wanted to go to a Cubbies game without your shirt on.

Oh, never. I would never be that guy. I would beat myself up.

So I started going down there and running, and it was great. And I was thinking about training people. And I pass. I used to park right by a gym that's like a globo gym. And so I walked in and I was like, listen, my name's Angelo Sisco. I want to talk to the manager of the personal training. And we sat down and I said, hey, listen, I have no experience besides this, what I've done. I really want to do this, though. Would you hire me? And he hired me that day. And I went through the little training process, and it was like my second day actually working there. And they wanted me to wear a shirt that I felt that was too tight for me, and they wanted me to wear a name tag. And they wanted me to, like, walk up to people, like, on the sneak while they were, like, on the treadmill and try to spark up a conversation about personal training. And I was like, f this, I'm out of here now.

Is this like a. Like, Like a. Like a big name gym? Like a 24 Hour Fitness, LA Fitness.

Like that kind of thing, that style of gym? Because I was like, I don't know how to be a personal trainer. I know I want to do this, but I don't know how to, like, do this. And so I walked out after two days and I sent the text message out of my phone and I was like, hey, guys, I'm going to be training people now at the so and so Civic center in Melrose park. I'm offering three sessions for $50. So it's like $16 an hour, which was just, you know, I Was just. I was like, listen, if I could get 10 people this, you know, 10 people a week to pay me 50 bucks, this would be. This is a sweet gig. And I'm already making enough money. This is just for shits, you know? And she go, and I did it. And I got those clients at the end of that first month. And then that was in July of 2009. And then September, it was getting a little bit chilly here in Chicago. And so we. I rented a racquetball court space for around another year or so. And then right around September of the following year, I was kind of getting a little. A little unhappy with, like I would have to close because it was the holidays. Or like, I couldn't train people because it was like a village hall on all those like, days. And I didn't care about those silly holidays. And so I was like, you know what? I'm gonna just go open up. I'm just gonna go open up my own gym. And so I started looking around and I found this building on Craigslist. And at the time I only took cash for my training. I didn't pay.

It was just ash. Irs.

You're not listening to anything, guys.

If you.

If you really want the $2,000, come and get it. Okay, I'll make it right. Okay. It wasn't that much at the time. So anyway, so we. I find this place, I don't. I'm only making cash and I have to go. I have to go fill out this like, lease.

Lease application. And I don't even have a bank account at the time.

Yeah.

And I call up my sister, I go, hey, listen, meet me at the bank. I need to put my name on your car just for two days and all your accounts. And so she, my sister, she's game to the death. She lets me in and I sign all that stuff, I put the accounts on there and I find this dungy little place, 2,500 square foot spot in an alley that it was in industrial, where it's not like nice industrial around here. It's like, it's kind of. It's in it. If I picked it, I wouldn't pick it today. Just put it that way.

Gotcha. You like your life? Yeah.

Like, oh man, it's crazy. It's so funny that this is where this gym is. And so I open it up and they call. The realtor calls me up and she's like, hi, we called the bank to verify your accounts. We see that you don't have enough money in there for first and last. And I go, I'm on my way. I don't have a check. I have a bag of twenties. And I counted out my first and last month's rent on the crusty factory warehouse floor and $20 bills to my landlord and said, listen, I just take cash in my business, but I'm sure you're not going to have a problem with that. You're fine. We. And I didn't understand anything about business. I didn't know that there was any rules to business. So I just opened my gym. I didn't think you had to go get like a business license. This is how like on business insurance.

And all that stuff.

None of that stuff. Because my last business I got by bribing a police department. I gave him pizza so you can.

Park in the red spot to fricking hawk your pizza. Yeah, it's brilliant. I love like the, I don't know if ignorance is the right word, but like it's bliss in this case because you're just making shit happen.

You know.

My focus in anything I do in my life is if we have to go to B, I want to get there as fast and as frictionless as possible.

You know, this is what B needs to be. So I just started opening up, you know, about a week later after the music and some people down the block getting their cars blocked in because we had more people than we were supposed to. They came and put the, like the sticker on my door that I couldn't open. I had to go to a hearing.

Come to find out, I went. I didn't fill out any of the applications, so I had to go fill out all these applications and do all this stuff. And I just stayed open the whole time. I would just lock the door.

That would do it.

Yeah. And you know, it's funny is that's the beginning of O' Hare CrossFit. And what's really amazing about it, and that's my favorite part about that story, is I wasn't this like straight edge business guru. I didn't know anything. And I just was really excited about getting people to be healthy on this thing that I felt like gave me a new lease on life because I was 100 pounds lighter. And all of a sudden in my brain, I wasn't a loser anymore. I wanted to just share it with everybody. And I didn't care about any litigation or anything. I just wanted to show people this thing that was CrossFit because like I said, this group based fitness model, there was one CrossFit I think it was, like, five miles away. It wasn't, like, a thing here, you know?

And that was the very beginning. I know. It's a very long story. I said so much stuff. And that's the very beginning of. That's how we got here.

This is amazing, dude.

We love it because, I mean, when you tell us long stories like that, you help us find all sorts of stuff that we want to dig in on, which is awesome.

Totally.

But I love the fact that you started. Not started, but you were actually renting out racquetball courts and training in there. I thought, like, that part of the story was just crazy to me. Like, I would have never thought to do that if I was trying to start a gym. I wouldn't have thought to go, hey, where's just some spot that I could go, rent cheaply and train people in this spot? And gone and found, like, a rec center racquetball court. To me, that's just. That's so sort of outside the box, thinking just to push shit forward, you know?

It's funny you say that. I have a godfather who recently passed away, but when I. When I would talk with him, I forgot when I went and saw him in, like, my 20s about business. And he told a story about a man that started in a real small office, and he let the customers put him in a bigger office and then a bigger office and then a bigger office. And it just. I think sometimes, too, that's what people get really caught up in, is like, you could start a business, you know, you could start training people at the park. You know what I mean? It could really be something. As long as you believe it, it's something. And that's just kind of how it went. And so it made it really easy that I didn't need a business loan. It would all just funded the next thing that funded the equipment, that funded the building. You know what I mean? It all kind of rolled from there.

Yeah.

And now you have two locations.

No, I currently only have one location. So I. In 2010, I opened OCF 2013. We expanded next door, which is just a little more than double the space. And then in 2015, one of my members, who was interning to be a coach, wanted to open a gym, and we opened it together, another location. And then in 2018, we decided that it was their time to really, you know, they were. When I really believe if you're a really good mentor, when, you know the people are done really looking at you, like they're learning from you, like, you Know what I mean? They have their own ideas now and they want to do it. You should find a way to get out of that relationship.

I asked them to buy me out and all good terms been like that, but it was their time. You know, you got to learn. You got a copy to off your mentor. And then as soon as you've sucked enough out of your mentor, you got to go do your own thing. You can't be living on the forever. You know what I mean?

True. Yeah. No, it's. It's to. It's getting that confidence built up and now, you know, some systems, some principles that you can carry along with you and. Yeah. And have a great relationship with that mentor, because that could lead to the next mentor, you know, of your evolution.

Totally. And that's my favorite thing. And I've. I've really done that with the people that I've really looked up to, and I hope people continually do that with me.

Yeah, yeah, that's. Yeah. And you mentor and we'll get into alpha hippie, because that's. That's a big thing. It's a big topic of the whole anxiety stuff with depression. But before that, I want to. Have you always had a chip on your shoulder as a kid? Did you have something to prove to the world or your dad or your mom? Was that a big driver for you?

Yeah, that's a really great question. Man. This is a really fun story, but here we go.

My father grew up in a family where his father worked two jobs and barely spoke to him, and a mother that basically blamed him for everything that was wrong in the house and to the point where when he was 14 years old, she forged a work permit for him that said he was 16 just so she could take his check. And so my father grew up in this household, also very overweight. So my father would get teased by kids from being overweight, and then he would come home and be something always wrong for him. So he grew up very in his own and very quiet and like that. And, you know, he also hit puberty and turned into a bigger man. And he was 6 1, and he was. He's always a bigger. A bigger man. My dad's got hands like first baseman.

Yeah.

Yeah. Just huge. And he. And he found out through trial and error one day that if someone picks on you and you fight them, they stop picking on you.

Right.

And so my father. You know, my father's tool of choice is aggression. And because that was the one thing that gave him power when he felt like he didn't have power from people bullying him.

Because he didn't have confidence to just, you know, that's not me. Or he didn't have anyone at home to support him. So the only thing that he ever figured out was, well, if I, if I punch you in the face, things are gonna be really different.

Yeah.

And when I was four years old, we were. We were in a. My father used to have a house in Lake Geneva. Lake Geneva is basically like the Hamptons to Chicago, just New York, like that sort of idea. And we would go there to the Fontana Lake, and we would go on the boat and Lake Geneva and all this stuff and have a good time. And when it was raining, instead of just being at our house, my dad would get a hotel room at a hotel called the Abbey. And then we could just go swimming in there if it was crappy outside. And one time my dad took me to swimming, and when I was swimming, my father saw a couple kids teasing me and picking on me. And I was a little kid and I didn't think much of it and I just kind of let it go. And my father was really upset by that. Right. And not knowing that, you know, I was just reliving a moment of his trauma. He picked me up out of the pool and when he saw the kids leave the pool, and we followed the kids into like the locker room changing area of this hotel pool. And my father made me fight all the kids.

Wow.

And I beat up three kids because my daddy told me to. And that was a very proud day for my father. And I got outrageously praised for this. And so as a four year old, you make your daddy happy. And he brags to everybody how proud he is. You're going to go do that shit.

Yeah.

And so I grew up same way when I got. I got suspended, I think almost every year from K. I didn't get suspended. Probably kindergarten, second grade, probably one year in high school, I didn't get suspended. But all the rest of the years I was. I would fight people. I would fight with teachers, I would throw things at teachers. This was just my. I was just ultra aggressive and I. And it was what I knew to be. And you know, people may hear that and think, oh, pardon me and everything like that, but guess what, guys? I got big balls. You know what I mean? At the same token, like, you know what I mean? Like, I created my whole life out of just a figment of my imagination to this thing that gave me freedom. So as much as that lesson may be a hardship, you just got to look at it and say, okay, where is the real lesson? And how can I apply this for betterment of me and my family? And guess what, guys? When my heart is called to do something and I feel excited about something, I make. I have four other businesses now, and Alpha Hippie's a business. It was just a hobby that I was playing with, you know what I mean? And so. So it sparked this ability to constantly be not afraid to create as well. So I wouldn't be me without that, but for the goodness of it too.

Yeah. And what was the shift like? When did you actually realize, oh, shit, I should not be approaching it in this manner because now you have this Alpha Hippie. So it's like you got hippie in the name. You're not beating people up anymore, I don't think.

Sure. No, no, no. I would say Alpha Hippie kind of really spawned in around 2000. Right? Around 2015ish. I would say in the CrossFit space, no longer. Just being a first adopter was enough to make your business grow.

Right?

And so, you know, I mean, guys, I started O' Hare CrossFit in November 2010, and I was foolish enough to believe, besides the popularity of CrossFit increasing, that it was me too.

Okay?

And why not? Guys, you got to understand, like, I grew up, like, we were barely making it, like, crying because I wish my mother bought me Jordans. And like one year we grew 275%. I thought it was fucking Rockefeller. I mean, I thought it was the coolest thing ever. And so, you know, I. And then what wound up happening is, you know, I wound up being very lucky. And maybe this goes back to our original, original thing is I had enough money then that we were growing as a business and I had a team, but we weren't growing at the rate that we were. And I started being a really big victim. I was blaming my employees, blaming the clients. It was a whole, like, just complete victim mentality. And I stumbled on this thing one day called the. What's that book called Emotional Intelligence 2.0.

Yep.

And I was like, okay. And I get this. And then I started digging a little bit more in this emotional intelligence thing. And one day I just. It all hit me where I was like, okay, wait a second. If my business sucks, this is a direct reflection of me. If I fix me, the business gets fixed. This is all this really equation really needs to be. And I felt the most empowered I have ever been in my entire life.

Wow.

And I was like, okay, so now I have no ego about going to get the answers and paying for the answers and asking people for help. I just didn't know where to apply it. And I. And that's. Then I went really big into joining masterminds and self development and meeting people that were making more money than me than better than me. But I was just fortunate enough that the business was at a place where it could fund me to go to retreat in California for the weekend for two grand. Like, I was so fortunate that I was able to have that, that bump of CrossFit because then as soon as I realized that I was the limiter, that's what really created Alpha Hippie and everything that I've been doing and me helping other people. You know, I thought for many years that in order for me to win, I had to burn you down.

Hmm. Yeah. With aggression and force and just push, push, push, Go, go, go.

Totally. I. I used to joke, but, you know, if someone opened a gym near me that I would burn it down. People didn't think I was joking, and partially maybe I wasn't, but, like, it was that kind of mentality, you know.

And if you want to be a winner, then there has to be losers kind of thing.

Totally. Like this closed minded, lacking abundance mindset. And then I just went really deep into learning all this stuff and really looking at me and really saying, why do I do this? And more importantly, where did this behavior come from?

Right. Because, like, what we're doing as adults came from somewhere.

Yeah.

Yeah.

And so that's what's really, like, led me all this stuff. But there was a really rough time.

You know, I tell people this all the time, like, because of how anxious I was and how aggressive I was and how I. All I wanted to do was win so bad. I really didn't even enjoy the building of the gym. I wish I really did. Like, I wouldn't. I was the guy that didn't celebrate anniversaries because I thought that that was. That was like bad luck that was gonna curse you and stuff like that. And I didn't. I didn't take days off and I didn't enjoy things. And I know that some people might hear this and say, yeah, you got to spend a little bit of a period of time hustling and doing that. I agree. You have to work hard, you have to put in a lot of hours, but the amount of stress you have to put on yourself during those hours is really a choice.

Mm. Yeah. That's the biggest thing. We always have a choice. And it's not until you understand, oh, when's the next best time to actually make this flip or this change that you kind of long before you see some other people doing? It's right now. And then, you know, the next best time is right now. It's like, just do the damn thing. You know?

I'm curious, what's your view on competition now, when new gyms pop up or other gyms are, you know, maybe getting more successful than your gym? What, How. What's your approach? What's your mindset on that kind of thing these days?

You want to know something? As I.

Very rarely even pay attention to.

Something like that, like a negative manner. Like, if somebody else opens up and they're just really at the end of it, they're going to make me have to be better anyways. And I think I used to look at them as that. As a nuisance instead of a chance for growth. And I think that's like anything if there's another. More competition or if someone. If a good client leaves or if one of your employees sucks. It's just a real chance for you to grow. And you wouldn't grow if something was great, if it wasn't quote, unquote bad or having a negative feeling to it. You know what I mean? It's just how you really grow. Because we're just meant to be just comfortable.

You know what I mean?

We're fighting for this idea of homeostasis, just neutral. That's what we're dying for.

That's true. And wouldn't that be. That's kind of a freedom feeling? I mean, that is freedom, you know, to get to this point where you don't have things gnawing at you. And, yeah, it's just this kind of little bit of white space.

I mean, I'd almost argue that, like, once you find that homeostasis and you kind of find that balance where, like, oh, cool, my finances are finally where I want them to be, my health is where I want it to be. Everything's kind of running smoothly. I feel like that's when you start to feel like the business is monotonous and you start to get bored with it. And I don't think you realize how important the ebb and flow is until you're in that point of homeostasis and you realize, oh, shit, this isn't necessarily what I want either.

No, that is.

That's true. It's like you kind of got to put yourself in the position to be ready for the turbulence at all, because it's there. You just got to be. You got to find out where it is. And it's not there in a bad way, but it's just there to wake you up.

Right. Yeah. So where do you find yourself now? Possibly struggling or slipping up. You know, since this big kind of change you've had in your. In your whole mindset, there are there triggers that pop up. And then in addition to this, like, what are some common triggers, you see other folks that you mentor that pop up for them.

Yeah. You know, I know this is cliche because I. When people say this, I kind of make a face, but, you know, we're all just kind of a work in progress. You know, we're really trying to figure things out. And for me, now more than ever, it's really understanding.

My wife is six months pregnant. I'm gonna have my first child September 9th.

Congrats.

Oh, I didn't know that. Congratulations.

Thank you so much. And, you know, my wife and I have done a lot of work separate. We've done a lot of work together. But when I. When we found out we were pregnant and we went through all this thing, a lot of things that I feel have just gotten a lot height, much more heightened in my interactions with people and everything. And even remembering, like childhood. Like childhood memories, they're not necessarily trauma, but just remembering things from my childhood or where things certain came from. I've had this crazy more awareness of where things are really coming from instead of just letting them just play out. I've really just started looking at every relationship that I have, whether that be with people that go to my gym or people that work for me or work with my other companies or anything like that. And I'm trying to see how I could make the relationship as best as it possibly could be to bring the best out of that person. And that has been my biggest focus. And what really happens though, too, is for you to bring the best out of someone. You see your shit so much more.

Right.

Because all the things that I quote, unquote, get bothered or triggered by other people are literally just reflections of me.

Right. It's a comparison thing. So in your head, at least, this is the case for me, is, yeah, you see something like. And you're always judging yourself. You're like, oh, shit. But there's this thing I really want to work on that I'm not the best of yet. So then you can go into the cycle of either beating yourself up or trying to be constructive and figuring it out.

Yeah, absolutely. Because you know what? It is too. And I'm sure you guys see this in all the work that you've done that you do is how you communicate and what you're saying and your body language and everything about communication is this.

Amazingly tough thing to do. Really well. It's really hard to get people to truly, truly empathize and understand with you. I don't care what anybody says. Like, it takes a lot. Right? Because most people's conflicts, I'm willing to bet, is literally because one side couldn't understand what the other side wanted and for some reason there was a breakdown in getting them to understand it.

Miscommunication. Yeah.

Yeah. And so for me, that's what I've been really focusing on is how, you know, how, you know, how am I approaching certain people, how am I talking to certain people, what is my behavior, my body language, you know, even working on affirmations, how I see or certain. See certain people. You know, really just trying to dial in that and making sure that I know, I really believe that.

I'm a teacher that just helps people be the best version of themselves and.

You know, more than a businessman. That's who I am. That's my art. And in order for me to bring the best out of people, I have to see them at their very best. And that, my friends, is one of the most challenging and most rewarding parts of my day because it's a wrestle with 35 years of built up programming, plus new fresh lenses that I'm trying to keep on.

Dude, this is good. Okay. This is good shit. Well, okay, I'm going to say really quick, I can completely relate to you with the whole baby coming thing because I have it written down. I was like a baby coming. I'm going to bring this up to Ange because my wife's pregnant as well. And I've noticed that you said the awareness is all heightened. Everything is just like. You start kind of becoming a little bit more aware of your actions, your time spent, how you interact with people. I know for myself, I've noticed times if I get stressed, I'll be a little bit shorter with folks, even my wife. But I'm aware of it and we have a good relationship where she will call me out and constructive way that, hey, you're a little short right now. Go on a walk, go on a drive, whatever you got to do. And yeah, it's like this interesting deadline, at least in my head. It's like, okay, I only got a few more months. I really got to figure my shit out or I got to systemize this part of my life. So it's an interesting deadline that's, I guess, self imposed.

Yeah. Here's an interesting question, since both of you guys are parents to be. I have two kids. I have a four and a six year old. And you guys both have kids on the way. What are your thoughts on this subject? You know, so a lot of the most successful people that I've. That you read about, you hear about, you know, even us included in this conversation, there's been a lot of hardship that's led us to where we are now. There's a lot of. A lot of shit that we had to deal with along the way, a lot of pain, a lot of stuff that, you know, that broke along the way. Do you think it's important for your kids to experience hardship in order to gain some of those same sort of things that. That instilled in you, or are you guys going to try to be very, very protective and try to keep them away from ever having to experience hardship?

Angie, go first.

Yeah, this is a great question. There's a really great coach, his name is Paul Cech. He's got a really great podcast. Paul Cech, I would venture to say, is one of the first true holistic coaches that there was. He was talking about being holistic before holistic was a thing in the 90s, and he's got a really great podcast. And right now, as far as like, coaches, he's the person that, in this evolution of my strength and conditioning and coaching, he's probably one of the biggest people that I really look to now. And I forgot who he said quoted this, but.

In order for you to reach heaven, you have to have your roots in hell.

And what I really hope for, for me as a parent is not to alleviate my child from hard times, it's to give them the tools that they don't have to suffer longer than they have to.

I like that.

That's. That's my goal as a parent. If my kids. So for me, my awakening was 30. If my kids figure this out at 29, God damn it. I fucking want so kind of let.

Them know hardships are on the way, but here's the tools to handle them better than I did when I was in your situation.

Correct. That's my goal, man. I think me trying to protect them from it is a farce.

Yeah, yeah. And that's where the protecting thing, I don't ever see myself making like, okay, I need to shield them. But I like the, like you said, tools. I'VE been thinking of principles like life principles, business principles. There's a lot of good books and podcasts that as education. When they're old enough to start understanding some of these concepts, my idea and plan is to kind of coach them and then start. Because we mentioned the whole programming thing when you're so young.

We've had foster kids in our house. We've had seven of them, and that is the most formidable time in their lives, when they're under five years old, four years old. And that's instilling good principles, but very good work ethic and just being clear with your actions and being true to yourself and your family. It's huge, because I know I didn't really have the best of that growing up. And your story is interesting and you've had your own thing and programming. Man. Let's talk about that really quick, because I know you're big on that with Alpha Hippie. And also give us a little overview of Alpha Hippie just for everybody.

Yeah, let's start there. Can you kind of give us the quick rundown of what Alpha Hippie is and what. Why you decided to start that?

Yeah. All right. So I came back from a big retreat.

Feeling amazing, telling a bunch of people that I grew up with about my mindfulness and all this stuff, and they made a joke about it, and I said, you know, the problem with this conversation is you guys don't understand this stuff because you're not an Alpha Hippie. I don't even know why I'm talking to you. And I was like, man, I want to wear a shirt that says Alpha Hippie. What a cool idea. And so I look online, and there's nothing really there that I really was inspired to wear. And I'm like, well, I guess I got to make a logo that says Alpha, because how the hell else am I gonna get this shirt? And so I created the logo and had it trademarked, and instead of only making one shirt, I printed out, like, a hundred shirts. And I was like, I'm gonna pass these out to people that I really like, because I think it's a really cool idea. And so I got a bunch of shirts, and I would just send them to my friends, and they would send me the pictures of them wearing the shirt or defining what Alpha Hippie is. And I would post it on Instagram. And I went to this huge festival called Envision Fest in Costa Rica, and I brought a big duffel bag of shirts there, passed them out to everybody, left them there, and it was just Kind of like a fun little movement, like, kind of saying at first. And I was like, well, you know, what else would really help get this message out? And what's something that would also give me a lot of energy. And guys, I really love long form conversations. I love doing this. Like, when people are like, oh, how can you do three podcasts, four podcasts in a day? I'm like, just a cup of coffee and some bathroom breaks and we're good.

That's exactly what we do, bro.

Yeah. You know, and I love this. I love connecting with people. And this was because what I really started thinking about is what do I love most about, like, masterminds and seminars? And it's not necessarily those teaching points and talking points. It's I find one guy that me and him have a vibe on something, and we wind up at the bar to find 3am talking about it. And those conversations are the ones that have really changed my trajectory as a man for the better. And I was like, well, how can I do this more often and more intentionally? And so I started the Alpha Hippie podcast. So it's been a little over a year now with the podcast, and it's been amazing. And then right around last year, I was in a really creative rut. I really didn't know. I knew I wanted to make something, but I wasn't sure what I wanted to make. And I just kept brainstorming different ideas and I started journaling about things that frustrate me because to me, if you want to create something, you create something to solve your own problems.

And so I. One of the things that really frustrates me is when men aren't living very intentional lives and taking responsibility for just being a man. And my old way to deal with this was just to bully other men. And that worked for me for about three minutes. But that really didn't inspire much behavioral change.

You weren't fulfilled after that?

No, I was fulfilled for about 30 seconds because that emotional adrenaline, oh, man, you get a load of chemicals, guys. It is addicting. It really is.

And so we. I was like, man, what if I just wrote out everything that I have done to get me to this point and shared it with other men? And I had this big revelation one day when after I was like, man, what if I created a course and all this stuff? And I started thinking about life? And I told one of my friends, I said, you know something? Life is the business of yourself. If you don't have a straight, if you don't have a clear mission and Core values as a business. Like, that's the first thing you do in a business. Because you need to know what you stand for and you need to know what you're, what you don't stand for. For. And I was like, how many men have this? My buddy was like, I don't think many. And I'm like, well, no wonder we're running around. We're either living an undefined life or an un, or we're living the life that someone else told us to live. Either way, you're screwed. And I. So that was the base of the course. And then I started thinking about, well, what's really important? Well, when I'm not taking care of myself physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually, I don't care what kind of values I have, I'm not going to hold up to them, right? Like when we're in a bad place, we're just not going to live up to those values. So the game isn't acting like we're not going to get these pitfalls, but the game is what habits and practices do I need physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually to put me in the best position to live up to those values? Because when I'm living up to those values, I'm being the person that I was meant to be. And so I created a course. I wrote out a 10 week curriculum and created a course. And Ryan, who's my dear friend and one of my clients, he actually joined the Beta group and so did seven other men. And that was last September. And I took them through an amazing group. And I did another group in January, this time with 12 people, and took them through the curriculum.

I was going to do another one in the spring, but I realized that I did not want to be running a group with the chance that my wife could go into labor. I really want to, I don't want to do. I would have to get. I mean, I would pleasurely give it up, but I wouldn't want to have to do that to somebody that was really committed to something. So I'm postponing it till after, after the baby comes. And I really want to be there for that. But I, you know, Alpha epi, Masculine Mastery, it's this private little Facebook group. I leave everybody in there. I post things all the time. I retalk about certain points and I just want to develop a culture of men that, that want to want other men to stand up for their greatness and they're not afraid that sometimes that someone's gonna slap you across the face to help you See it like, you know what I mean? Like, people just are afraid to get called out on their stuff. And you don't get better unless someone's calling you out on your stuff, unfortunately. Because if you could see it, you would have already fixed it.

Yeah.

This reminds me of what I'm trying to make. Go ahead. I'm sorry.

Yeah, no, this reminds me of. I was actually had a conversation with Ryan yesterday. Him and I were. We took like a little hike in the afternoon and he. He said straight up, I called Jan or Ange because I needed someone to basically get me out of my own shit. Like if I need someone to hold me accountable, essentially, is what he. What he said there, you know, with the stuff that. That he's working on. And no better guy than you in his eyes. And it sounds like that's exactly what the course is doing on a larger scale with that small group.

There it is. I really believe that being. And this is no way that I'm against women and all that, but I believe that there is a certain responsibility that happens when you decide that you're going to be a man.

And I think I want help other men realize that. We have. Women have an incredible role, but so do we. We matter. And how we act really affects a lot of people. I think what a lot of men don't realize is for a lot of men or for a lot of people, how you interact in the world has more to do with your father than usually your mother, because your father is your first relationship in your life. So how you relate to people, your first relationship, I'll say it again, is your father. And how you relate to people is directly correlated to that relationship because that is how you learn how to relate to people. You believe that you're a part of your mother, you come from your mother. There's no separation there. And I think men don't realize that just by how we walk and talk and the energy that we have in our facial expressions, it affects people in a very big way. And if you're not doing it intentionally, you're doing us all a disservice.

I love that.

I'm wondering. I know we're kind of getting towards the end of our time here, but I'm wondering if maybe we could talk about some practical tips, practical strategies, some of the habits and practices that you might touch on with some of your clients, for sure.

So for me.

Getting a physical practice. So that means some form of working out, some form of taking care of your nutrition. I'm not saying you have to be on a certain diet. But that physical, the nutrition, the exercise, the breath work. And this is kind of, this gets a little taboo for some people at first in the course. But part of the alpha hippie masculine mastery course is you have to take some form of a self defense course.

Ooh, interesting. I like that.

And at first some people had some pushback on it and I said, well, let me ask you a question. What do you think you're here for? And men are here to love, protect and teach.

That's it.

Love, protect and teach. That's what you're supposed to do. And if someone, if your wife is walking and you're walking with your child and someone pumps out and grabs your wife, you don't turn into Jason Bourne on accident.

You haven't seen me yet. But yeah, most people.

And so that's part of the course first. And the reason I really harp on the physical because one of the biggest things to getting good at mastery is repetition. Right. Ok. And what fitness provides is the most safest feedback loop to help build resilience and discipline, which builds that idea of repetition because you need to be resilient and disciplined to go to the gym every day.

I couldn't agree more than I can possibly count. Numbers high. Yeah, it's just me just working in my garage and getting programming given to me by Ryan. It's like shaped everything else in my life to be a lot more structured and regimented for the best.

Absolutely. No, absolutely. And my other favorite part about fitness is this is fitness and exercise is probably one of the only places that you could fail. And it doesn't really hurt, goes against you. So if I wanted to run a mile in eight minutes and I went and I ran the mile in 10 minutes, I could just come back tomorrow and try to run the mile again. My whole, my self worth doesn't go away. I don't, you know, it doesn't really affect that many people. But what it really teaches you to do is how to be resilient and how to come back and do that. And you need the discipline to show up consistently. And so for me, if you could get those two things down from the physical, everything else you have to do and change in your life comes from your ability to be disciplined and have resilience.

Do you have a preferred martial arts that you steer people to?

I do because I love Jiu jitsu.

Yeah, I knew you're gonna say that. We talked to so many POD or so many of our interviews that we have on the show. Are obsessed with Jiu Jitsu. And it's definitely a common thread among really, really successful entrepreneurs that Jiu Jitsu is a part of their life.

Yep.

I just got back from it before we got on this podcast. Here's the deal about Jiu Jitsu is everyone has to practice to get good at jujitsu. You're just not good at Jiu Jitsu. And what Jiu Jitsu is is wrestling. But imagine that wrestling is checkers and Jiu Jitsu's chess.

Got it? Wow. Okay.

And for me, the reason I love Jiu Jitsu is because it's this endless place for me to be a beginner. But I will tell you guys the truth. What I really appreciate the most about Jiu Jitsu is what I think most people appreciate about surfing. It just gets you in the rhythm of life. It gets you in rhythm with things. You can't, like, just bull rush in Jiu Jitsu and think that you're gonna be good. I have to feel your pressure. You have to feel my pressure. I have to feel where your foot, like, and I have to move in rhythm in unison with all this thing. It's almost like when you watch people dance or, like I said, surfing, like, being a part of that, and it really creates this place where you feel really connected. And I really love it. I do it two to three days a week. I really, really enjoy it. I recommend that everyone should give it a try. And specifically to females, Jiu Jitsu teaches you how to not be powerless on your back. Where for most people, not just females, males included, even to myself, being on your back and having someone on top of you smashing their shoulder into your face just doesn't. You really have to get trained out of your flight or fight response to really be able to handle yourself. And I think it's just important because the reality of the situation is, is that position can be a reality for you. And I would rather know how to get out of it than get there and not know what I'm doing.

Hell, yeah.

Yeah. I mean, I'll be. I'll be totally honest. Martial arts. I actually took Taekwondo when I was a kid, but this was, like, really young, like, maybe 10 years old. But martial arts as an adult has always sort of intimidated me. I've always thought, I don't know if I want to go to a place to just, like, get beat up.

You don't want to get your face smashed.

I don't want to get my face smashed in, you know? So I've always been sort of intense, intimidated by going to any sort of, like, martial arts. Because in my mind, it's like, all right, cool. I'm going to go in, and I'm just going to start sparring with people and get my ass kicked from day one.

So, Ange, talk us into. Because I'm kind of in that same boat, But I'm visualizing how that's very constructive. And we have so many damn friends. How do you get us out of our office and into a jiu jitsu gym?

You want to know? You guys do what I did. You ready?

Yeah.

Is you did private sessions for three months with somebody that was a much higher belt than you, that went really slow with you and broke it all down from you. And sure, it's going to cost you a little bit more money, but then when you go to class, you're going to feel really comfortable. You're going to know when someone is a good partner or a bad partner, all that stuff. That's what I did because I didn't want to go there and have some white belt that was just all aggressive and get me hurt, man. I got. I got a family. I don't want to be hurt, But I also want to learn to appreciate the art. So if anyone's apprehensive about that, I understand it. And hell, you may just be apprehensive because someone's going to choke you, and I get it. But, like, doing it with someone that is educated, that is a far bigger belt than you, that is going to teach you, but not be a bully to you, has been the greatest thing to get me deeper into jiu Jitsu. So that's what I recommend.

Perfect. I love that. And I have a few names, a few people I can think of right now to go approach.

Well, you and I could go share a private one.

We definitely going on lessons together.

There you go.

All right, so we got the. I know you have, like, the four pillars and just run a little tight on time. So we talked about, like, physical mastery of alpha hippie. So you have what, the mental game and spiritual and emotional.

Right, Right.

For sure.

So for the mental game, that the major thing I recommend for. For all men to do is start journaling. I really believe that men has. Have lost touch with their intuition, and I think that's one of the most hallmark amazing parts of being a great man is having an intuition that you have wrestled with long enough that you actually trust that it.

Yeah.

And I can. I can speak into that, too. I'm a. I journal a lot I do fall in and out of the habit, you know, I'll journal every single day for, like, three months straight, and then I'll go like a week or two without, and then I'll kind of feel my head getting all weird and go back to it. But one thing I do notice about journaling is that you find that you already have the solutions to a lot of your problems. And I've fleshed that out through journaling is a lot of times when I don't know the next step, I don't know the next path, I'm sitting here going, oh, shit. I have no clue where to go from here. In our business, in our relationships and whatever. And throughout the course of journaling, I find that just by putting my pen to paper, all of a sudden, answers start to flow out of me.

Agreed. You know what it is? It's just like this. If I came on here and told you about my problems, you guys would be able to tell me in 20 seconds. Because you're objective to it, and journaling allows you to become objective with your mind.

Yes. I love it, man. So journaling is huge. And I know you're big on meditation and stuff like that.

Sure.

I just discovered this new thing about meditation. You guys want to hear this?

Ooh, I love it. Yeah.

So I was watching one of Joe Rogan's podcasts, and there was a guy, his name is Naval Something. Please forgive me for that.

Oh, Ravikant.

Oh, God, I'm nerding out so much. Yeah. Yeah.

So I really enjoyed his podcast, and this guy really talked about meditation, and he went back and forth with Joe about it. And I like, man, this is a great thing. So one of the things that people tell you about meditation is that sometimes you're supposed to count breaths. You're supposed to say a mantra. You're supposed to do all these things. What's the difference between me saying a mantra when I'm meditating and me looking at social media? It's just. It's all a distraction. You just label it good or bad. So what I've been doing is I just sit there, and my brain goes every different direction that I could think of. And then I try to make sense and really understand why my thoughts are these certain thoughts. And my goal is to make myself at enough peace where there are moments without any thoughts where I can just be still. And so that's what I've been really working on lately. And at first it's a little bit tougher, but after three or four days, that Inner chatter just goes down a couple decibels that it's not even that loud throughout the day.

Yeah, I remember that specifically from the podcast because Joe Rogan was talking about counting the breaths or just following his breath, and naval was like, no, just, just let it be. Let those thoughts come up. That's the, that's stuff you got to kind of work through. And maybe that's another journaling prompt that, you know, you can go to write it down, work through. But yeah, it just starts to silence a little more the deeper you go.

I think, I think that's a lot of people's biggest problems with meditation is they sort of beat themselves up about not doing it.

Right.

Right.

You know, people are sitting there and, oh, I can't, I can't make my brain completely shut up. I can't. I can't have a completely still mind for more than 15 seconds. And then they just think they're doing meditation wrong. But really, in reality, I mean, at least in my opinion, meditation is the, the journey, not the actual, like, end result of having a completely clear mind. The fact that you're noticing stuff flow into your brain and then you're able to shut it up, and then more stuff flows in and then you're able to shut it up. In my mind, that's what meditation is, is that sort of back and forth, like sort of yin and yang of your brain being very active and being very quiet.

Agreed. That's all it really is, is making friends with that voice instead of running away from it. And you run away. Like I said, distractions are distractions. You know, if it's a good distraction or bad, you just got to make sense of it. Yeah. Then with the mental stuff too, one of the things that I have, everybody in the course take is something called the Colby A Index.

Colby's great.

And I, you know, I don't care what you, what you do or anything like that. I think a lot of people look at Colby and think it's only like this thing for entrepreneurs and entrepreneurial minded people. But, you know, how you, how you naturally get a problem solve is a really good thing to know about yourself because it's got to be how you handle situations. And more importantly, a lot of relationships would be a lot better if people understood, if people were a quick starter, a fact finder. You got me. Because I know you guys know that stuff. And so for me, the mental part is really getting people into awareness, into how they problem solve and then also what they need to do to do their best. Work. So we go off the flow genome project and we start talking about what flow profile they're in and what they need to do to get into flow states to really do amazing work. I read a book once called Try by Sebastian Younger. It's a wonderful book. And there's something called the self determination Theory to be content. And there's three things. One of them is to feel authentic in your lives. The second is to be connected to others. And the third is to feel competent at what they do for work. And I think more people aren't really understanding that part of your happiness really is predicated upon what the level of satisfaction you get in your work. And if you knew that, you would really figure out how to. If you can't change your job, at least you would figure out how to hack to make it a little bit better for you. For you.

I love that. All right, well, you just answered one of our final wrap up questions. I know you're tired.

Yeah, we got to get you guys. I got. I have boom, boom, boom. I have seven more minutes.

All right, cool. Let's jam quick and without our tangents because I know we're slowing it down a little bit.

That's all good. I love it.

Spiritual and the emotional stuff, I just want to hit on those pillars.

Yeah. So spiritual. I'm a big proponent of something called human design. It's based upon the. The time you were born and when you were born. And it gives you a really good layout of decision making. And I found it to be incredibly accurate for people. You know, for me, spirituality is believing in something bigger than yourself and trusting in it. Right. And.

I have no view or opinion on religion. If that's what you need to feel that, then go ahead and do that. Right. Like whatever it is. But for a lot of people, I think they just. What religion can create sometimes is it lacks individuality.

Right. Yeah.

We're all Catholic, we're all Christian. Well, you know, there is so many little other layers besides just labeling a Lutheran or anything like that. There's so much more to people. And what human design lets people really see is really how they were meant to operate and be amongst in the world. And my hopes is doing that is helping people letting go of all the things that they need to hold on to, to try to self identify with. And. And that's where most people are struggling spiritually is they're just attached to a certain identity or certain way of things are instead of being what they really are supposed to be or trying to be like Someone else.

Yeah.

And the spiritual time is probably when I spend the most time doing all the one on one calls with everybody and really helping, helping them wrap their head around that. Because, you know, you tell me it's one thing, but it's five layers deep. You know what I'm saying?

Sure, yeah. It's an onion. You gotta unravel that bad boy.

Yeah. And for emotional mastery, what I really work with men on is something called nonviolent communication.

I'm a really big believer that a lot of men are angry and rageful.

Not just because of emotional trauma, but because of lack of communication skills. They don't know how to tell someone without tearing them down that they hurt their feelings and they wouldn't like them to hurt their feelings anymore. And here's what they would need so you don't hurt my feelings anymore.

What do you recommend for people to work on that aspect?

Sure, yeah. The book is, there's a book, it's called Nonviolent Communication by Marcel Roseberg. It's a framework in order to do this. And I always carry this around with me. It's called Nonviolent Communications. The basics is I know and use them. And it's like a 50 page small book that gives you like the Cliff Notes of it as well. But it just really, and these are really good to turn to if I, if I have something to say. But just, you know, if, if you guys did something to offend me, me saying it in an objective manner and not labeling you or giving, you know, crediting you with doing something of malicious or malicious attitude or anything like that, it's just going to get you one step more to wanting to resolve this problem.

And I think that one of the things that I think Joe and I have a lot of respect for, for you around is the way you communicate. It is the way that you have, you know, Joe's mentioned it many times already today that you have a very no bullshit attitude. Like you don't dance around things, you just say it as it is. This is what's on my mind. Take it as it is. There's no malicious intent.

Just it's objective.

It's very objective. This is the way I feel right now.

Yeah.

And that's one of the things that we, that we love about you, is that you have that attitude. And I think it's something that both Joe and I really strive to have in our own communication skills.

But I know, I know we've got to wrap up here. You've mentioned a handful of books already. On this episode, emotional intelligence, 2.0 tribe, nonviolent communication. Are there any other books that you refer to often or recommend a lot?

Sure. My favorite book on just the type of person that you should be is Marcus Aurelius Meditations.

Yeah, good one.

You know, I think anyone that could be the emperor of the free world and not be a greedy pig, I want to learn from.

Yeah, absolutely.

And then on leadership, there's a book called Cyrus the the Arts of Leadership and War. And it's more of a tale to get you to learn the lessons. But it's probably been my favorite book on leadership. It's the one I recommend the most for people anytime they ask.

Love it, man.

Love it. And then final question, where do you want to send people after listening to this episode?

Oh, sure, man. There's so many avenues that we could go. I'm sorry to do all these plugs, but here we go. If it's anything online fitness related or programming and stuff, I have a company called Conquer Athlete with my dear friend and mentor Jason Lyden out of Connecticut. We've combined forces to really help people in the online space with training programs and especially we have an extra specialty geared towards anybody in the CrossFit space. I own a company with one of somebody that I've developed and just cherish like almost like a daughter. Her name is Becca. We own a company called Lifestyle Nutrition and Christina is actually one of the coaches for Lifestyle Nutrition.

Really? I didn't know. Oh, I didn't know that actually.

So I'm part owner in that company and you can find that at Lifestyle Nutrition and Conquer Athlete for the one before. And then anything for Alpha Hippie is at the Alpha Hippie on Instagram. I'm posting shows there every week and as soon as we have our beautiful baby, like I said, I'm going to start ramping things up for the course again.

Love it, man. Yeah, check out the Alpha Hippie podcast. There's some amazing stuff and you deep dive so many interesting people in all this stuff we're talking about. So Ang, thanks for your time, man and go and get out of here. Best of luck with the baby too. That's gonna be super exciting.

Same to you. And guys, thank you so much for having me on here. I really hope I was able to add value to you guys and your listeners and if any of the listeners have any questions, I'm pretty active on any kind of DMs or anything like that and I check all the ones that are requested and all that stuff. I'm not that popular yet. So if you guys have anything you need, if I could serve you guys in any way, please don't hesitate to reach out.

Appreciate it.

Appreciate it, man. Well, have a great one. We'll talk to you soon.

Take care.

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