Unleashing Your Superpowers: How to Build Your Own Iron Man Suit For Entrepreneurial Success with Tina Marie

What I would do is create like a spreadsheet that just is. Okay, here's. Here's all the things that I do. Here's all the things that actually make me money. Here's all the things that actually give me energy. Here's the things that drain the life out of me. Here's the things that drain the life out of me and don't make me money. Well, that's an automatic filter. Get rid of that.

Hey, I'm Joe Fear and welcome to the Hustle and Flowchart podcast. This is where we talk all about building businesses so they give you the freedom and fuel for your life. I'm not here to help you build a billion dollar business, but I am here to help you create business with systems that work for you so you can make more money than you need just by working part time. You know, I was a chronic hustle mode kind of guy and I want to share my experiences and mentors I've met along the way to help you reframe things to be the most effective as an entrepreneur. I wish I had this guidance and insight when I was younger. So that's what I'm doing here for you. Please share and enjoy.

Yo, yo. On this episode, I have a friend and previous guest from episode 63, way back in the day. That was a whole different world back then. I have Tina Marie on the podcast and I'm just going to tell you, strap in and get ready to talk a lot about your superpowers. That's what she specializes in, is really uncovering the superpowers of business owners and then figuring out how to build powerful systems that are custom to you and your team that support your strengths and weaknesses. And she's got a hell of a story. You're going to love it and she's told it before, but as I've just told you, 63, I mean it's episode 500 and some change now. It's been some time. But the beautiful thing is she hasn't really changed what she's done. So she's crushing it. She is one of the secret weapons behind my wife's business. My good friend and lurker, podcast listener Dan Ryan, and many, many, many long term clients that she has worked with in a bunch of industries here, but mainly in the online space of course. And she's talking about how business owners can craft these simple systems to really understand their own superpowers, but also bolster that business, bolster the team and everything so everything can run very fine tuned using these simple Systems to elevate your business to new heights. And really, it's getting you out of your own way, getting you to guard your time, how to filter what you're working on, who you're working with, saying no, how to define things within your values, your priorities, your. The pace of things, taking ownership of what actually matters and what doesn't. This one will give you a lot of clarity. I'll just say that she's helped me for years. She continues to help me. We have a lot of. Some cool background stories with Matt and I, obviously, previous host, co host with me, alongside me for many years. Matt knows Tina as well. So you're just going to dig this one. It's going to be a fun chat. And get ready to get that notebook out because there will be a lot of notes you want, too. So enjoy the episode. I'll catch you there. Tina. We are back. Round two. We're live. We're not live, but, you know, we're rolling.

I'm glad to be here. Thank you.

Yeah, I mean, I. You were episode 63. Looking at it right now, I don't.

Oh, you're in the 500s now, aren't you?

Yeah, yeah, it's. It's kind of trippy, to be honest. And, you know, this is one of those foundational things, Tina. I just. I can't quit the podcast, you know, chat with people like you.

People have their callings. I think people, they feel pulled. And I think that we do ourselves a disservice when we step away from what we're pulled to, because I think that that's where the magic is. And I think that sometimes we feel this conflict and we want to go and do something else and we get the sense of FOMO and whatever. But I've. I've explored the tangents and I've learned that there's never anything greater for me on the tangents, that if I always just come back to center, come to the things that I'm called to, that there's magic. And, you know, you've had all these amazing people that you've got to connect with, but then you connect them with other people. And I think it's just. It's beautiful. It's amazing the way that human beings can connect, and especially through technology, it just. It's. In one way it's mind blowing, and in the other way, it's like, of course, you know, this perfect. It's natural. This is so how it's supposed to be.

It's true. And I know you. You've seen my kind of restart of this brand. And of course, you've been working with, well, my lovely wife, Heather. Shout out to her and also amazing friend Mr. Dan Ryan.

Yep.

Who will eventually grace this show himself and not just shout it out all the time.

I'm calling out 2023. Dan has to be here.

It's his year. All right, good. Hey, I wanted to pause this and give a quick thanks to my friend Greg Merrilies and his team at Studio One Design. They're the ones that built my website over@hustleandflowchart.com I couldn't be happier. They. They nailed it. It looks so professional. They basically read my mind on the vision and they executed it beautifully. I now have a perfect offer to display. It looks super clean. I've already been getting a lot of people asking all about it, and I've been referring everybody to Studio One. So they actually put together a quiz for you if you're looking to optimize your current website or build a new one as a full quiz that gives you a ton of results on how to improve and optimize what you're doing. So go complete that quiz at studio1design.com/joe. That is studio the number one design.com/joe. It'll give you a free report after you finish that quiz. He's also given away some cool bonuses, so go check it out@studio1design.com Joe, you were one of the first names that popped back up in this recreation, reboot, revival, whatever, of Hustle and Flowchart because of who you are and what you stand for and your. Your fundamentals and principles. Because, like, I just kept hearing them all the time and, like, reminded of them through Heather and Dan. I know you've been working with Dan for what, six or seven years or something like that?

Yeah, six years. Yeah.

I mean, you just have longevity with all of your clients and. But to go back, it's like what you just mentioned with Conn Connecting and all that. That's where I saw for myself. I'm like, I need this outlet. Like, this outlet is part of me, and it's what does really fuel my life. I know that's like in the intro of this thing. And it's true, like, I realized I'm a connector. I'm a co creator.

Well, that reminds me of, like, when we first met. So it was traffic and conversions, like 11 years ago or something. It was. No, actually, it was San Diego. Was it San Francisco? No, it was San Francisco. It was San Francisco. So that was like 12, 11, 12 years ago.

Something like in San Diego. Yeah, that's right.

Yeah. Yeah. And so, you know, people were kind of gathering in the lobby, and people were in and out and in and out. But then you were. You and Matt were there. And Andy also.

Is it Andy? His song?

Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.

Yeah.

Oh, my gosh. We were. I know his name. This is my brain. And I do this with my own children's name, so nobody should ever be offended if I'm talking and I can't. Anybody's name. And his son was there. Curtis.

That's right.

And so watching Curtis grow up and all of his other kids, it's just kind of fun how we're connected. But you guys were there, you and Matt, and just talking, you know, friendly, whatever. And then the. The next day, I needed to go catch a ride to the airport, and I'd never used Uber yet.

And you guys are like, new then. Yeah.

Oh, it was. It was new. And I remember I was gone the day before with Linda. I can't think of her last name, but she worked with Rich Chefron. And anyway, so it was only my. My second time going, but I didn't have the app yet. I didn't know how to use it. And you guys are like, well, you can get a ride with me. And I'm like, o. I guess I feel safe.

Go to the airport. But you guys were really friendly and just. I just watch you connecting with all of these different people having friendly conversations. And, you know, there's a lot of different kind of people that show up to those events, and they're not all my people, but you had this family vibe, you know, just very. Just kind of low key. And I'm like, okay, those are my people. I feel safe and we can go. And not that there's right or wrong or whatever kind of people, like, we're. We're all here, but. But, yeah, I just remember. And so then you watch people. You go to these events and you connect with people on Facebook and you. You kind of just observe who they are socially. And that's just been the. The mainstream is just conversations and connecting. I watch you guys and you specifically asking people questions and taking that input and then kind of adding to the conversation, and. And I feel like I do a lot of that too. But for sure, like, after years of watching people, you see that there. Stay consistent. There's a lot of people who hop around. They don't even know who they are. But Joe, Fear is like, I love Technology. I love marketing. I love business. I love talking to people. Like that's. That's been you true all the way through.

There you go. Thank you. Well, hey, I mean like I love all the flattery. I'll take it's true too.

Lottery winner. It's just how it is, man.

It is true. And it's funny you say that because for a long time the fact that a lot of us don't see these gifts and you know, these truths that we all have that. And for me, for a long time, like I, and I did bounce around a lot, but I took that as like, oh man, I just bounced around a thing to thing. But that's when stepping back and looking at the podcast and especially reviving it, bringing back my friends, you know, that I haven't chatted with for years, I was like, is this the thing? And oh my God, it never went away.

And like I said, it's the tangents. And then you come back and you're like, oh, this is actually home base. This is where I really. It's an anchor. I like to use the word anchor because this is where what keeps us like you float away. Every, every summer I take my girls out on the lake and we go fishing. We run a boat and we'll spend all day out there and we drop anchor, find a place that we like and the anchor, we never really stay completely put, but we stay in the vicinity and because I used to think anchor is just like, you're there, you don't move. But unless you have a boat that has a pulley system that can pull the anchor all the way up, then the anchor can't be that heavy because you have to lift it manually. And so depending on how deep the water is and how strong the waves are, you're going to, you're going to, you're going to float a little bit.

Yeah.

But you stay in the relative vicinity and, and so I like that, that visualization of being able to see use a phrase that instantly means something to everyone. I could use anchor with anyone and it means something that even if they don't precise vision of what I'm meaning when I say the word anchor. They, they're close. They're. You know what I mean? So anyway.

Oh yeah, I, I scribbled a little doodle of a, of an anchor and a boat and a happy.

But yeah, like it's so powerful. It's. Yeah, it's like you can revolve around these. I guess what I'll kind of like what you Said right before we hit record is universal truths or these fundamentals that fundamentals might hold for ourselves. Yeah, that's what I see in you. And, I mean, it was funny because you were just telling me, this is for everybody. Listening is, you know, on episode 63, which is when Tina Marie last graced.

This podcast is, like, six years ago.

I think something like that probably was easily. You haven't done a lot of new.

Things, and I haven't done any new things.

And that's absolutely fascinating, and I'm intrigued. And first of all, can you just remind us all, like, how you would describe yourself, how you want others to know who you are and the superpowers you bring to these folks or to everyone that is.

Well, I have a lot of gifts and superpowers and that. That's not arrogance, because I think everybody should be able to recognize them. You were talking about you didn't recognize, you know, what your particular thing was. Right. What your gift was. And one of my gifts is seeing that in other people and having enough confidence to just speak it out loud, which I have not always had, because I would doubt myself. I would see things, and I would not know how to say it, not be able to say it in such a way, or just think that I was crazy, you know, that nobody wants to hear this from me, but. But it is recognizing power in people. I'm talking to your lovely wife, Heather, and I would just tell her constantly how smart she was, how brilliant she is, how strong, how articulate she is, and the things that she can point out and put together and assemble, but also how unique it is because she. I've worked with hundreds of different people in business over the years, one on one, and. And I've. I've just, you know, watched people my whole life, and she really. She really is unique in the way that she can just dissect what's happening, see it very clearly, and see the pieces inside of it and know, okay, if I put this piece here, it should do this. And her ability to articulate that, but also to choose the leveraged piece, because leverage is one of the anchor words for me in business. It's always leverage. Like, I want the most impact for the least amount of pressure. Oh, yeah, It's. It's seeing people's gifts, which works really well in working on the clients, you know, business consulting. Because I can also see where people's weaknesses are and can be able. I have an ability to help them say, you know, just because this is your weakness doesn't mean you're weak, right? None of us have all the gifts, none of us have all the weaknesses. So being able to just have people say, you know, these are your strengths, these are your weaknesses. And rather than focusing on your weaknesses, figure out how to fortify around your strengths, right? Leverage those strengths and then fortify the weaknesses, probably through delegations and systems, right? I talk about building an Iron man suit around my people. So they are Iron man, right? Tony Stark is Iron man, but without his suit, he's not really anything, right? So the suit is engineered, it's custom tailored to his needs, his thoughts, his wants, his strengths, his weaknesses, his mission, what he wants to accomplish. And so for me, what do I do is I build Iron man suits around people. They're already there, right? They are the hero. The hero is the essence. It's the person inside. It's Tony Stark, right? But one, saying, I see who you are, I see you're the hero. And two, if you really want to be maximized, let's build your suit. Let's, let's like build this idea ideal suit. And it's, it's an engineering process. There's a lot of thinking that goes into it. A lot of time, a lot of iterations. You know, he. How many times do we watch these movies? And he's got new suits, new suits, new suits, new suits, right? You never get to, I'm done. You just, you, you just keep evolving. So that's what I like to do. I'm one of the hashtags I used to love and I use a lot would be better every day, and that's still an anchor for me. It's just better every day. But my best, you know, I'm not trying to compete with anybody else.

I like that. I want to go back to like the Iron man suit. That's a perfect analog. I love these analogies, by the way. A perfect picture that everyone can kind of take and run with, but unless.

They don't, like Marvel, and then they're not my people. So whatever.

Come on, get on it, people. How would you like if they don't have the honor of working with you? Are there, are there a few things that you would suggest to folks if they were looking to discover what their gifts are? Their, their talents, their strengths, their weaknesses? Like, do you have, do you have a process for that? Or, or, yeah, quick weight.

Okay, hit me for sure. It's always ask questions. And if you're not good at asking questions, find somebody that's good at asking questions and have them ask you questions, it's probing because that's where you start with, right? Is we make assumptions about who we are. We make assumptions about who's around us, what the world is. We make assumptions about what's possible, which is what happens when we have scarcity mindsets. We've made an assumption that very little, very few things are possible. And so we just kind of live in that world. But there's, there's two components to it, right? There's, there's questioning and then there's testing. So there's having a, an idea and then testing it kind of scientifically, like just stretch a little bit. Well, what if I do this? Well, I don't think I could do this, but, but I think there might be like, you know, 15% possibility. Just go ahead and try it, Try it and see what you're made of. The biggest thing is, you know, people like to study, they like to read, but, but life is outside of the library. So you have to put things into action. So asking questions about what's possible and then, and then trying things. The next thing is data measure everything because everybody, everybody I have ever worked with assumes things incorrectly. I think I can say one example that's not that way. We ended up not working together because he already knew that stuff and he didn't need me. And we're like, oh, well, this, this is not a match. And I'm, I'm not going to say who it is. But one exception. In nearly 21 years of, of doing this in business, well, online and remotely, and before that, six years in corporate, only one person knew his numbers inside out and backwards. Almost everybody else had no idea or they were very, very wrong, which is still kind of no idea, right. When they went in and did their number. So learning how to build very simple financial calculators, which I'm actually in the process of creating that I'm just going to give it away because people need to have that and you have to have a starting point, right? And the selfish version of it for me is I'm not going to work with anybody that makes less than $50,000 a month. So you have to get there. Right? And I want to work with great and amazing people. I want to be able to. I love getting to use my gift, but there's a lot of people who aren't ready for me. And so I'm not satisfied, right, Because I don't get to use all my skills. So if I give Stu away for free and they build themselves up to that, and then there's more people that I get to work with down the road. So it's financial systems really basic people over complicate everything. We all overcomplicate everything, like so bad. We think everything is harder than it is. Which is why I go back to try. Because once you. The hardest part is always the unknown. Anxiety is defined as just the fear of the unknown. Working on my psychology degree and remember going through that and learning that and I'm like, that's really all it is. It's the fear of the unknown. What if? So you take that fear away and you disable it when you know something and the way that you know something is to walk through the path and to find out for yourself. So everybody wants to learn in a safe environment, in a risk free environment. And that's not actually where you get your real knowledge. It's real practical applications. That's why all science courses, well, not all social sciences don't, but biology, anatomy, things like that require labs because you need tactical knowledge to, to be able to understand what's happening. And now my ADD brain has lost the train of thought and I don't remember what you asked me.

You're nailing it. I mean, I'll just rip it. It's. It's building hypothesis hypotheses around us and because yeah, we're not living in libraries. Even though how safe books are and how warm and cozy we might be when we read those books. Yeah, yeah, life ain't like that always and most times it's not. But we can engineer it to flow more. And yeah, I've definitely noticed when I get. Well, I'll just be honest. Like when I wasn't doing the recording of this podcast for a handful of months, I, I did consume a lot, but I wasn't acting or I wasn't testing a lot. I was questioning ish, but I, yeah, it was still stuck in the what if. So it's definitely.

And that's where the anxiety grows because the longer you're in the consuming and not in the trying and the doing, the. The more it's all what ifs, right? You just keep adding the what ifs because, well, I could do this and because you keep putting in information and it keeps sparking ideas and those ideas are potential possibilities but the only reason you haven't taken them is because there's also a risk involved. And so all of these things you keep adding as possibilities, you've now added all these potential risks that could happen in it. And then you, it's, you know, Analysis paralysis or. Yeah, so it's, it's putting some guardrails in. One of my favorite words is boundaries. Ask Heather, get codes installed asap. And you have to figure out where they are. And one of my favorite ways to do that and this, this is one of those things that anybody can do, right, is define your non negotiables. And they really have to be non negotiables. Very few things I think should be non negotiable negotiables, but. But what they are, should be. So my non negotiables are, I will not work on Sundays. I one time fired a client who got mad at me about that. And I had no other clients at the time. And I was a single mom with four kids. And he's like messaging me non stop and he's like, why aren't you responding to me? And I'm like, I told you, I do not work on Sundays. And he got mad about it. And I said, I also don't get spoken to like that, that we're done. And then had nothing. And, and he knew that. And he's like, well, come back. And well, nope, nope, that's not happening. I was willing to go on food stamps. I was willing to do whatever it took because I believe that what you allow continues. And so if you want to say, well, I will behave better when my situation changes, that's not the truth. You have to be willing to pay the price for the better situation. And then you get the better situation, the better situation doesn't come to you. And then you get to mosey on over there nice and comfortable like. So that's, that's not how that works.

Yeah. And what you allow continues. Yes, that just rang true right there. Because we can allow life to just happen to us or our thoughts to just go on this like endless leash or not a leash at all.

And, or partners to behave a certain way, you know, clients to behave a certain way and ourselves to show up in a certain way with all, all of that keeps happening, but anyone can fix it by installing. So back to the non negotiables. You know, working on a particular day. One of the things that I did in the very beginning too, when I first started testing boundaries was, I'm not talking to you after 3pm My kids get home from school. I am, Mom. I actually didn't even start that soon. It was, I'm not talking after like 6pm because it's bedtime and they need to have a safe unwind space where nobody else's energy is coming into me through my phone where there's this volatility and this potential for somebody to say something that upsets, upsets me. And then I'm upset in a sacred space of, of winding down. Like when children are preparing for going to bed. They need no anxiety, they need peace. They need to be able to go to sleep in peace, dream, rest, replenish, to be able to get up and start the next day. But if I was having conversations with people and somebody's like, well, we've got this problem and you've got to fix it. Well, now I'm stressed out and I have super strong energy. It's palpable to anyone around me, good or bad. It's really fun when it's good. It's really not fun when it's bad. It's uncomfortable. And my kids pick up on it. All kids pick up on their parents energy, whether they have super strong energy or not. But even more so for me. And so I had to stop that from having the possibility of even happening. So would not check my phone. But also I don't want you to message me because I might happen to be on my phone doing something, talking to a sister, doing whatever. So, so don't message me. I'm blocking things like do not disturb and slack and messenger and all these other things. So two different little things. And what I found is the more that I created boundaries, the more peace and space I had and then the more vigilantly I wanted to protect it. But here's the other thing. When people won't respect those boundaries and you enforce it, they get kicked out. Just imagine yourself flicking a little fly and a little nat. Get out, get out, get out, get out, get out. But the magical thing that happened is the right people come in and they come in and they stay in. And it is so beautiful. Because this is another thing that Heather and I talked about too, is like you have finite yeses, cannot say yes to everything, and you cannot say yes to everyone. Well, imagine there's this circle around you, right? Your inner circle, your sacred space of people that you love, people that you like, people that you work with, right? There's degrees in those circles. They're concentric circles, so they expand out and there's ones for the ones you love, ones for the ones you like and work with and whatever. Well, imagine there, there's finite space, right? You don't have an infinite circle around you because then you get diluted and you don't have the same power and effect over that sphere that circle around you so there's only so many people that can be in there. Well, every person you say yes to is occupying that space. So if you say yes to people that don't respect your boundaries, don't even like you, don't respect your family, don't. You know what I mean? They're taking up space from the people that would do all of those things and appreciate you and like you and enjoy you and strengthen you and make you better. There's no room for them. So happily flick those other people out, enforce that line. And then, and then the amazing thing is you get these people that come in and they stay in and they stay for years. Like my oldest client is nine years long. The shortest one is almost two years. And it's, it's amazing because when you get to really understand people, I can build them better Iron man suits, you.

Know.

So it comes full circle. But everybody has the ability to recognize what boundaries, so they don't define it. That's the biggest thing. Most people haven't defined their boundaries. They have not drawn any lines of the sand, so they can't even enforce it. So the first thing a person can do, any person can do is say, what is it that when it happens, it causes me to be unexpected, unhappy. Every time this happens, it causes me to be unhappy. Whatever that is that needs to be a boundary, do not let that happen. And I'm not talking about, like, I'm unhappy when I don't get to eat chocolate.

I'm not talking about. I'm unhappy when somebody tells me things I don't like to hear. Because we all need that person that will tell us the truth, right? But it could be. I don't like it when people swear at me, me or condescend me when they're telling something, right? So be careful what you. What you cut out. Because you could cut out the things that are good for you, but everybody can find out, like when somebody curses at me or somebody like expects me to talk to them at 10pm at night just because they want to, those types of things, right? Whatever those things are, then I want you to draw a line right now. Just pick one thing right now and for the next 30 days, don't let anybody do that to you. And then I want you to realize that nothing died. You didn't die. I want you to notice how much peace you feel. Even if maybe you lose a client from it, maybe you lose a friend from it. There's that real pain. And that does happen, by the way. There is the real pain of setting up the boundaries and the loss that happened, even if it's bad loss, even if it was a toxic loss. But what you also need to notice is how good you feel by having protected that space. And in business and personal lives, once you start installing boundaries in one place, you install them everywhere.

That's right.

Because you recognize like I need these fences today.

It's true. And I'm thinking of the Betty better every day, you know, hashtag you use and how it's not. It's. It's just an evolution. Like you're. It permeates everywhere. I'm thinking that, you know, the referral partners you get from your clients in this case bring more the similar type people to you.

Yes, you're exactly like dan to heather.

100%. Yeah. It's just wild because it definitely. Like I've seen with Heather. Like I'm not going to speak for Dan because I don't know his. But I know with. For Heather it's. It has been exactly that. It's boundaries. It's being accountable to those boundaries as.

Well as an anchor word. For sure.

Oh my God. Yeah. Because I mean you can easily just say, oh well, this one time I'm gonna bring this client in or I need the money or whatever excuse or thing.

What you allow continues. So you're just gonna get more of that. That's how it works.

That's it. Yeah. So I mean in the energy piece is maybe some people might think it's a little woo or whatever, but it's real. Obviously energy exists and that goes back.

To hypothesis and test it. Test me. Try it. Yeah, go ahead, tell me I'm wrong. I dare you.

Because it's. I think K parents listening every. I'm sure you'd everyone would agree is yeah, you bring that energy, any kind of energy. I mean dogs will even feed off of this probably even better than kids maybe is. Yeah, you bring that energy and it's just obvious on their faces like something's a little off here. And yeah, I would never want to bring that into my sacred place of this house that I'm in. And I hear my wild, wild one out there right now. But it's happy energy. I want that energy. But it's accountability. Like really that's the thing I wanted to reinforce there. And it's garbage. Guarding our time because no one else is going to do it for us.

And guarding time and energy. I really like I can't drive that home enough because so many people are not mindful of energy. Like they talk about it, they don't really know how to define it. And, and it's, it's different for everyone. There's, there's so many facets and nuances to that word. Going back to anchor, right? You might imagine something, but we all kind of have a different reference point for it, including our ability, number one, to perceive it and our ability to impact it and, and even to imagine it as a, as a thing that we can guard. But we do notice, like Maya Angelou said, people will forget what you did for them, but they'll always remember how you made them feel too. You know, not verbatim, but that's what she said. And that's the thing. So pay attention to how you feel when you do certain things, when you talk to certain people. We can't get rid of all the things that, that feel bad. And also, not all the things that feel bad are bad, but also yin and yang, right, are on the same coin. So if you pick up the good, you pick up the bad. And so you just have to make sure that whatever good you have and you bring in whatever's on that flip side, whatever is that yin to that Yang, you have to be willing to take that because you don't get to cherry pick. I'll take this side of the coin and leave that. I'll take this. You know what I mean? So, so being mindful of that also and making sure that you understand that trade offs. Another conversation. Heather and I had a lot trade offs happen. And when you make any change, when you evolve, when you grow, when you choose something new, you trade one set of problems for another set of problems because everything has a set of problems. It's just that there's one set of problems that is a better match for you. You're better equipped to handle them. They're going to be less detrimental, have less propensity towards burying you, you know what I mean? And just being, being mindful of that. But anybody anywhere can, can take these concepts and just pick one thing. They could take a note, honestly. And, and it's not because none of these are new ideas. I don't, I don't own these, understand them. Some of them I've understood innately, without reading books, without hearing anything, because, because of natural gifts I have. But I still didn't invent the concept, you know what I mean? Even though I understood them innately, it was through observations in the world. So when I say go and take notes on these things, don't take notes because I'm like, I'm so smart. Listen to me. It's because first of all I bled for these things like legitimately or spiritually or some other way. I bled for this knowledge and, and this understanding and would be pointless to go through it and not to share it with people and, and not everybody has that kind of strength, but everybody can in the same way that, that we can. So I'll go back to Gene Schwartz for a minute because I was having this thought a couple days ago how fundamental. So I did. When we say going back to Gene Schwartz, I think this was pre recording. I think it was, brought him up. So his, his book Breakthrough Advertising, which now Brian Kurtz and his partner Chris. Well, Brian Kurtz owns the rights. He works with Chris Mason and they created a, a companion book called Breakthrough Advertising Mastery. Which is amazing because Breakthrough Advertising is dense. Oh yeah, it is a dense, dense.

Read and tough to get too.

Yeah, but it's an amazing book. And so, you know, Gene died in 1995 and people are still buying this book and it's $125 and it's worth every cent and then some. Because what he did was went through text advertising for. I feel like it starts in the 1800s, which was shocking to me, but there, there were advertisements then in, in some form of paper. But all, all through the ages and how these, these concepts just keep showing up. Because psychology has fundamental principles, people have not changed our core desires like Abraham Maslov's hierarchy of needs. Though psychologists will say it's not perfect for everyone. The foundation and the fundamentals of what we need as human beings are, are the same. The difference is, is that some people innately just have certain things met. Self actualization comes naturally to some people, even if they're hungry and poor, which is, you know, it's just odd. But, but that's human nature, right? Nobody has all the gifts, nobody has all the weaknesses. So back to Gene and, and these, these fundamental truths and the psychological truths. So Gene has these principles, but they're not his principles. He documented them. Them, he assembled them. There's a saying, I don't remember who said it. That great copy isn't written, it's assembled. So because all of this knowledge already exists out in the world and fundamental truths are fun. They're, they're timeless truths. Their theory of application has always existed because humanity exists, because our brains exist, because our physiological needs are the same, because our psychological needs are the same. What changes is our, our weaknesses. You know, like our food chain and supply has been corrupted in, in all kinds of different ways. I have a friend that she's gone to Mexico. List of may shout out to her. I love watching this lady. I love watching all these different people. She went to Mexico and she's like, this food is not the same. It's smaller and it's more colorful. Their fruits and whatever she's. But the flavor, it's like everything is water at home. And, and so things change in the environment. But the fundamentals of our needs and the fundamentals of operations, you know, and if this, then that kind of thing in the world, like one plus one will always equal two. You can say whatever you want to say. You can be in any country, you can speak in any language. But the truth is there's no other way for that to be equal other than one plus one equaling two. So. So learning how to observe what are fundamental truths in the world and just seeking that kind of knowledge and then taking it and making a practical application. Okay, I've learned this thing, right? I've learned the theory, I've learned the concept. But now I want my body, I want muscle memory. I want to never forget this. Like when you're driving. This is one of my favorite analogies in anchors too. Do you remember what it was like to learn how to drive life briefly?

All right, I do. Yeah. It was very frustrating. Especially stick shift.

Yes. So I, I learned stick shift too. And one of my strengths is I can remember from like I can, I can draw a picture of where I was when I was a year and a half old when something really traumatic happened to me. So I do have a powerful memory. And that's, that's a gift. It's a curse too. It's a gift and curse. That's how that works.

Learn to balance it. I'm sure.

Yeah. So, but if everybody would take it just a second and try to imagine themselves being in the vehicle. And I want you to imagine the first time, like you pulled out of a driveway and there's a car coming and you're trying to figure out, do I go? Do they go? Do I turn left? Do I put my signal on? You have to think. You have to process every single thing that happened. When you first learn how to drive. You have to, you have to think about braking, you have to think about accelerating. You have to like, where is my blinker? Do I go at a four way intersection? Do they go, have I stopped? You have to process every. Looking in your rearview mirror, looking in the side view mirror. You have to Process everything. And it is stressful because your brain is like, bing, bing, bing, bing, bing. And it has to be like that because you have to take all that information in in order to be safe. You need to do that. But what happens is after you've been driving six months, a year, five years, ten years becomes automatic. You really don't have to think about hardly anything. It's reflexive to turn your blinker on. Well, hopefully some people, it is clearly not a reflex.

I'm just California, come on.

Watching this pedometer. Not reflection for some people.

But. But a lot of it is reflexive. You don't. You don't have to think about things. You get in. You just know. You automatically look in the rearview mirror and check on the angle. And some people, there's quality, whatever, but. But that's the difference in every new thing that you want to adopt. In the beginning, it causes anxiety because you're like, what do I have to do? I don't remember what I'm supposed to do. There's that unknown in the process, and there's also the unknown in the result. Well, what happens if I keep doing this for a month? I don't know. Find out. And. And so then you start to do something, and that's the whole 10,000 hours, right? You become an expert. And what is. What is being an expert? It's when the knowledge is now reflexive, it's now a part of you. Your muscles remember it. Your. Your whole physical being and your spiritual being remembers these things and knows them inside out. You could do it in your sleep. You could do it forwards and backwards. So that's another thing. Take something and just learn. Try, do, stop. Stop getting everybody else's voices in your head. When there's something that makes good sense to you and resonates with you, you stop consuming and just practice and get good at something. And if you're already good at something, work on being even better at that, because that becomes a powerful lever that you could just use over and over again. And that's when you go and you. You find a group of people and you're like, I've got a shovel. And somebody else is like, I've got a pick and I've got a rake, you know, or I've got a hammer, but somebody else has the nails. Like, we all have our different things and we all need each other. But if you're not ever trying to sharpen that one tool that you have, have and approve that one tool you have, you'll. You'll never be really. To show up with people that have power tools themselves. You know what I mean? Does that make sense?

Yeah, you get kind of dull. For sure. Yeah. And everything's built off of fundamentals that we can learn from probably more of the fundamental type books like Gene Schwartz's work and so many other, you know, Think and Grow Rich is another great one. And from there I would think that, you know, we, we place our values on those things. Like we figure out. Well, first we probably want to define what our values are personally. And I could.

That is one of my steps. Absolutely. It's a fundamental step in my nine step process. Defining your values.

Yeah. And I'm sure that goes right in there with, you know, boundaries kind of come from that point on, right? Yes, from the. Yeah.

Because so values inform. And I won't say boundaries, but. But that is it. Values inform, priority. Priority informs, action, action. And where most people get stuck is what do I do next? What's the next step? Well, you can't determine the next step if you don't know what's the priority. Right. And, and that's the thing is people like I don't know what's most important. I don't know what should I do. And some, most of the time people will have that conversation. But where they, they get broken is because they, they didn't do step one. They didn't do the fundamental step, which is what are your values? You can't figure out what your priority is if you don't know what your values are. Are.

Yeah, you're, you're anchorless. Right. I mean like your, your values are. I doubt they'll change a lot. Maybe you'll refine them over time.

Right.

Some aha moments. But yeah, it's. How can you even be. I guess it's weird to think like how can you be directional if you have an anchor but you are, you know, like you have kind of like this, this realm that you want to play in and you get really good at that. It's kind of like sharpening the tool like you said. Said. And the beauty is that we don't live in a bubble. We don't live in a library or in a book. We live with people and we can co create together if we choose to step out and do that.

And we're always co creating even if we don't realize it.

That's true.

Because we're not islands. Yeah, we're always doing it. We're just not doing it intentionally. And we're not engineering what we're creating. A lot of times it's just haphazard. But we are always co creating.

Good call and good. Yeah, it's a good reminder too because like we were just talking about, about, you know, your, your daughter's growing up in this, this age today, you know, and give them five years or so and you know, we're gonna have a whole new not species but like weave of people kind of.

I know there's, there's never been a time like this before. They've never had these kids. All of them have access to the greatest minds and mindsets. They also have access to filth and drudgery that no child was ever really exposed to you a hundred years ago. Not no child for sure, but they're, they're in the mire. But they're also in, they're in the assembly hall with the greatest minds ever. They have access to Seneca, they have access to Socrates. They have. And they're getting it distilled though through somebody else who's explaining it to them in their language. At the age of 10.

I can explain it to them like they're 10 or 5.

Even though if you just want to go take it to go to chat. Gbt.

Yes. That's.

Explain this to me the words of a fifth grader. And then spits it out and you're like, wow, I've already taught my 13 year old how to use AI and it's good. It's a time to be alive. It's amazing.

Yeah, well, I've used that VR that prompt many times. Explain it to me like I'm in fifth grade. Because his brain isn't.

No, you're like, and this is not for my fifth grader. This is.

Wait, I want to, I want to get to the action piece. And I knew that part of yours because time is a huge thing. And I saw, saw this with Heather and I know Dan and the company. They're running together and individually tracking your time, guarding your time. It's huge. And you have a word that I remember Heather was reminding me of and I think I did research or remember from a previous conversation, but pacing. Pacing your action.

Yeah. One of my anchor words. Absolutely.

Let's, let's talk about that pacing.

So this pacing is very much tied to values and priorities. So it's really, really important that you understand your values and priority in order to define for yourself the best pace. And this really comes up and I really hope that parents especially have very young children are paying attention. Again, this is not just my wisdom but it's something I experienced. But I for sure have heard the story over and over again from, from other parents going through it. And I'm a grandmother now, so I'm watching my daughter go through it where, like, I wanted to be mom more than anything my whole life. And then when my first baby came around, I was like, well, I want to be here with you all the time, but I have to work a job. And this was 2000. She was born in the year 2000. And so I'm like, I have to figure out how to stay home with you. So for your benefit, I'm going to work 80 hours a week at this computer to figure that out. Well, that's not what she needed. She needed me to be there. And so I felt this constant tug of war of like, be present with your child because you don't get this time back. But I also felt like, but if I don't figure out how to make a certain amount of money from home, I can't take care of her and I can't be here and somebody else is going to raise her. And when I took her to daycare, because at the time I was working in a call center in the corporate environment and I would take her to daycare and I'd bring back who was once a vivacious, bright light thing, she was so dull, she was just glassy eyed and just unstimulated. And it was heartbreaking gain. And so the value came in that I need to be home with her, right? So a value was established clearly from that point. But then I started to recognize that being in the same house with her is not being with her. Being in the same room with her is not being with her. When I would get annoyed because she was making noise and I needed to focus for her sake, right? This air quotes for her sake. No, it wasn't because for her sake I needed to be there, present, holding her, teaching her, observing all of the amazing, wonderful things that she was doing. And so, you know, there had to come, all right, I can't do work during this time if she's awake, if she's upset, if she's crying, she's playing, whatever, all of these different things. And so having an awareness of time started then. And then fast forward to getting divorced. And then I have four children who were ages 10 to 1 one and four kids, single mom. I was already working at home and I'd been working home from home since 2002. But I hadn't needed to be the sole provider, so I didn't have, you know, the amount of money that, that I, I needed to, to take care of us comfortably because that is a value that I have. I don't want to struggle and think about finances all the time because that, that's a particular thing where if I'm worried about money, then my energy is just, just down. There's a lot of things that don't bother me at all. There's a lot of pain that I can tolerate very well. But worrying about being able to give them what makes them happy and feel comfortable, I'm one of those people. Like, I feed, I, I feed people, right? I love through food, through comfort, spoiling and things like that. Like, I want my people happy, fat loved, you know, playing in the sunshine. Like, I, I just want to see everybody laughing, especially my babies. Yeah, I, I don't let people go away empty. And. Yeah, so then this, this awareness of time, right? And I talked about how I had a client that wanted me to work on Sundays. And texting me, you know, they're like, well, we need you to do this. We need you to do this. And so having to install those boundaries again, because my value was I, I want to have good energy for my children and I, I want to have space to connect with God. I want to feed my spirit. I don't want anything coming day. And so I started having some awareness of this. So I started time blocking, which is a concept. I don't even remember where I got it from, but it for sure wasn't. I didn't originate it, but I had to do it in a particular way. All of my systems, and one of the things I'm known for is systems, but I really don't even feel like that's the thing that I do most. But it is, it's just, it's just reflexive, you know what I mean? So I don't even really acknowledge it and process it, but my systems have to be done my way. I need walls, I need blinders because I get distracted too easily. So all of my systems are super simple. And so time blocking. I can't do it in a calendar because I look at the calendar and infinite, and it's all these tiny little things. So what I would do is create like a spreadsheet that just is, okay, here's. Here's all the things that I do do. Here's all the things that actually make me money. Here's all the things that actually give me energy. Here's the things that drain the life out of me. Here's the things that drain the life out of me and don't make me money. Well, that's an automatic filter. Get rid of that. Right. So I started to have some awareness of this and then I started applying it with clients. But the thing is, they didn't have an awareness of what their time was. And I used to take people's word for it, but then I learned everybody wrong. Everybody's wrong. They always spend way more time than they think they do doing the work and less time than they think they do with their kids, with their families and everything else. And so we go through a time tracking process. I'll use Toggle. There's all kinds of different for me. My app, I remember was called Complete Time Tracking.

I remember that one.

Yeah, yeah. And I. So it's data, data, data, data. Right. Real information. Because everything that we think is usually wrong. But when you take the time to sit there and capture it, it's annoying. Annoying. It's tedious. And I'll tell you, most people won't do it. I don't really need this. You might be wrong, Tina, but I'm not wrong. There's a level of arrogance that comes from it and it goes back to prove me wrong. I dare you. Go track it. And I guarantee you, because I've not had this experience with a single person who didn't have an a serious aha moment. Like, oh my gosh, I cannot believe I'm actually spending this much time doing this. Or then what we do is make a correlation to the time tracking and the financial tracking, right? So they'll say, I spend, you know, five hours a week doing this. It makes me 2% of my money. I spend five hours a week doing this, it makes me 80% of my money. Oop, I just heard my granddaughter. I don't know if she's noisy in your background.

It was all good.

But so, so making those two correlations, which is why they're the first two modules that I have anybody go through. And honestly, those two alone, like if nobody did anything else other than track their finances and track their time and then draw the connection to it, they would have a completely new business. Those two principles alone are, are primarily responsible for me doubling revenue and cutting time in half for myself and for my clients over and over and over and over and over again. Because they really don't actually know. They don't know what the levers are in their business. And they're pressing the long run levers, the wrong levers. It's like going into A plane. And you see all these switches and you're like, I know what one to switch. This one is red, this one is green. This must be go. You know, we make these assumptions and they're wrong. And you need to know what the levers actually are in your business. And the only way to do that is, is to measure it. So tracking your time. So if somebody's listening right now, go through and get a time tracking thing. Track your time for. For two weeks, weeks, as thoroughly as possible. Everything that you do, especially if nobody else is going to see it. Track how much you're sleeping, track how much time you're watching tv. Track how much time you're doing copywriting, administrative emails, texting, texting, you know, clients, texting partners, texting, family, whatever. Just have an idea. Just because the more that you understand about your time for real, right, the real data, the better. How much time are you spending staring at your computer and nothing is coming to you? That's important. Important because that happens to a lot of us. And the biggest reason that it happens is because we are not time blocking. And so we're switching from creative tasks to analytical tasks, from like admin to copywriting to whatever because we get a ding on our computer that makes us hop around. And so you never get into the state of flow and you're changing these mental modalities that solopreneurs, you know, will often do. These people with very small businesses, even if they're a person that has 10 or 15 people on their team, they're still responsible for a lot of things. And so they don't block off their time and something will come in and distract them and they'll lose their train of thought. We're sitting here having a fairly linear conversation and still lose our train of thought. Right?

Not any outside distractions, for sure.

Exactly, exactly. And so. And then there's kids coming and phones ringing and dogs barking and all of these other things that are happening. It's weird because that reminds me of the VSL that you made for me.

Yeah.

Like 11 years ago. I'm like, I said the same exact 11 years ago because I was trying.

To find that I couldn't. I have. Oh, you do?

I have it. I do have it. Yeah. No, it's good stuff because. Because that's the truth. That that's the life that we all leave is that lead, that there are all of these distractions. So figuring out where they are, where they show up the most. Most. One of the things that you'll learn if you Track your time is where you actually have the best flow state. Like for me, it's 11 o' clock in the morning till 1 o' clock in the afternoon. I'm, I'm just dialed in, I'm energized. My brain want, but about 1 o' clock to 2 o', clock, you know, it's not a fixed time. Every time, yeah, I'm ready to work physically. I want to clean the house, I want to exercise, I want to go do errands, I want to do whatever, but I do not want to be at a screen, I do not want to be in a chair. And, and so if, if I'm called to go do desk type work after, I'm going to be very cranky. So I just don't let it happen. And that became a boundary. So time, time, I'm just looking at it, keeping track and, and keeping inventory. Like if you have a brick and mortar store, your inventory is your products, your stuff on the shelf. But when you are a brain worker, right, your inventory is your mind. It's your, your mental energy, your mental capacity, and it's your time, right? And your energy. And, and we don't take stock of that. We don't keep inventory. We have no idea what our supply levels are or when we need to restock or when we're going to be running low. And that doesn't make any sense to me.

So data gives us all the answers.

Numbers. Okay, this is my last thing. This is what I'm going to finish up with unless you tell me.

I was conscious of your time. I'm like, you're on a flow, not stopping yourselves.

I'm like, I love what I do. I love what I do. Because it makes us happier when we get to put these boundaries in our lives. We have more time to be human beings, to be friends, to be husbands, to be wives, to be mothers, sisters, brothers, to do all the things that make the world great. Numbers, numbers, numbers, numbers, numbers. Numbers tell the truth. Here's the thing. When I said, like people think they know, you know, what their finances are, and they're wrong. They think they know where their time goes, they're wrong. But numbers also do the selling for you. So if you're trying to persuade somebody, including yourself, to do something, if you're using it and you're copywriting, show the numbers. Show the evidence of if this, then that, right? If we have this, then, and we have just whatever the numbers, numbers tell the story. So the sooner you get to truer numbers in anything in life, the sooner you understand it more truthfully and also the better that you'll be able to communicate it to somebody else and persuade them to go where they need to go. Because math is math, right? Math is true. And, and you can't fake it. Everything else can be faked. I mean, we are in the world of AI, where every. You don't even know what's real anymore. There's going to come a time where like, you just, you'll see a video, like, is that a real person or not? I have no idea what just happened. But math, math will always be real, will always be true. One plus one will always equal two. There, There will be no two ways about it. Everything in technology can be, you know, brought down to ones and zeros, so everything can be simplified. Bring it down to the simplest truth that you can prove. And, and that's where you start when you don't know where to go. Take it down to the most to the simplest thing. And that would be data and numbers. Track things, things. Measure things, understand them. And when you understand them, you can improve them.

Oh, I love it. And this is where I'm gonna shore up and track a lot more of my time. Know what you're talking about. In terms of tracking my sleep, I'm like, oh my God. I'm like hardcore about that. At least seven hours now. And. And I could just see how that motivates me to whatever the heck I'm doing, you know, later in the evening. It's. It's summit. It's brain working, you know, like, there's always creative things and. But yeah, there's gotta be these boundaries. And that's just one example where, you know, like, wearing an Apple watch really helps. Tracks a lot of stuff. That's data. And we could do the same in our business. There's so many tools and.

Should do the same.

Should. Good call. Well, Tina, I want to keep going, but we will leave that for another episode. And it's running a business that we enjoy, but it's also living a life that we feel fulfilled and we do find our enough this way. So.

Sure.

Thanks for reaching out when you saw this direction of the show and kind of this mission that I'm heading down right here.

And actually Heather tagged me. She's like, Joe. It was Heather.

I made a post and she's like, Joe. Next. Next one. Although I would have, but yeah, no, Heather.

Well, thanks for giving her the credit. Yeah, thank you for showing up big time here, Tina. And is there anywhere that. Well, if they follow you on Facebook. They're going to get some really cool nuggets of wisdom that you post. And they're funny, quirky. There's always a lesson in there. Where can folks find you other than Facebook?

They can find me at tinamarie IO because it's just short. I'm expanding into a lot of things. The girls are growing up. I've only got five more years, and then the last one will have left the nest. And so I've got things in the works and I'm excited about. And one of the biggest things is just giving back and giving away some. Some basics. So connect with me. TinaMarie IO IO so whatever I'm doing new will be there and you can contact me. I'll reply just because if anybody's going to take the time, you know, I don't imagine there's going to be a million people doing it, and I'll. I'll have time for it. But here, for people that want to do their work, you know, and not everybody does, which is. Which is why I appreciate the ones.

That do and, you know, to. Yeah, you got your boundaries. For the folks that work with you and the ones that, hey, there's a lot of cool information and places that you're sharing, too, so. So go reach out to Tina. And thank you so much for your time and some extra time, too. This has been fun catching up.

Thanks for having me, Joe. I appreciate it. I love talking about these things.

Oh, yeah. Have a good one.

You too.

All right. All right. That's what I got for you today. And remember, it's not all about living to work. It's all about working to live if you need to do the work. But, you know, work can be fun and it should be fueling for your life. So. So if you enjoyed what you just heard, if you got some nuggets of wisdom that you want to share or you're just noodling on right now, please go tell others. The way that people find this show and how you can help others get their aha moments is through word of mouth. So if it is telling your friend, telling your family, send an email to your list, writing a review or whatever it might be. Everything helps. So thank you so much for listening. Listen to the Hustle and Flowchart podcast and I will see you next time.