18 Summers: How to Have a Lifetime Relationship with Your Children and Grandchildren with Joel Weldon and Jenny Locklin - Genius Network Episode #194

So the goal is to be present. That's the first suggestion. Be present with those that you love. Because it can be a lifetime relationship that when you get older, it doesn't disappear. And I know so many people who don't have that. And they say, but Joel, my kids are all grown. It's too late now. Well, you can share it with them for when they have kids, like Vernon did with me in 1967.

If you'd like to join world renowned entrepreneurs at the next Genius Network event or want to learn more about Genius network, go to www.gienstruitnetwork.com. the premise of this message is that you can have a close, deep and loving, long term relationship with your children that lasts a lifetime. Most likely. You know, Joel Welden is a hall of fame professional speaker and speaking skills coach who's been hired by over 200 of your fellow Genius Network members as their personal speaking skills coach over the last eight years. Plus his partner, Jenny Laughlin, also a Genius Network member, and his daughter. In 1967, Joel's boss gave him two words of wisdom on how to have a long lasting relationship with your children. Those two words were 18 summers.

18 summers. So the question is, is it worth investing time with your children? Now, as Joe said in the introduction, not all of you have children, but you know people who do have children. So hopefully this message will be helpful for them as well as for you. So if you have this relationship, it can last a lifetime. So we're going to take you kind of behind the scenes to something that normally you've not seen me do in eight years. Talk about something this personal. But it was because of Elko and what he said happened when he had two children, now he has three, that this made such a significant difference to this longtime member of Genius Network. So from the day that little one is born, you've got 18 birthdays, but you have 18 summers. And the reason summers are different than years is they go so fast. Can you think back to last year? Summer just started, then it was over, and now we're getting ready for summer, and summer's gone. So summers have a different impact on us than years. So if you think about those 18 years, why does it end at 18? Well, because they've got a car, they're going to college, many of them have a job, and they become independent. Not that your relationship ends. So the goal is to be present. That's the first suggestion. Be present with those that you love. Because it can be a lifetime relationship that when you get older, it doesn't disappear. And I know so many people who don't have that. And they say, but Joel, my kids are all grown. It's too late now. Well, you can share it with them for when they have kids, like Vernon did with me in 1967. Or maybe I only have them part time. I got divorced, I don't have the kids. I can't just spend all the time. But you have some time with them or they live far away. How do I do it? Well, we've got FaceTime. We have devices that can bring you closer even if you can't physically be there. If you do this, you can have a lifetime relationship with those that you care the most about. Your children. So what does that mean? Their school? You should be involved in the school sporting events. If they're on teams, never miss a birthday party of any of your children, having meals with them, going to parent conferences, graduations. Never miss a graduation. 18 summers, that's all you've got. You can do this. I know you're busy, you're making money, you're in Genius Network, you're running a business, you're working out, but you can do this in your 80s. I mean, that's what I'm doing. It doesn't have to change. You can work a long time, but your kids only have those 18 summers. The time is now, those 18 summers to be with them, to spend time with them. It's possible you can do that. And when you're there for them, they will be there for you. And that's where my daughter comes in, my youngest daughter, Jenny, and my partner.

Well, you might be thinking, how do I get my kids attention or the grandkids attention or the niece and nephew, Right? I mean, they're always on their phone, they look like this. And it's not just the teens. And right, they're starting so young now. How do you compete? Right? But it doesn't have to be a big event, it doesn't have to be a big trip or a big to do. Meet them where they're at. So you know where they're at if they're on Snapchat, if they're on phones, they're doing apps, they're doing games. Meet them where they're at. And I'm going to tell you, there is no difference between teens on their phone and seniors on their phone. The seniors are on their phones a lot more than teens. So I do this now that I'm older, my dad's older, I meet him where he's at. Alright? So if he wants to be on the phone and he wants to do, you know, the filters. We'll do that. So we get on. Okay, dad, we'll do the Snapchat filters. And he really likes the filters. Okay? So we spend a lot of time on the filters. So really, it's all about just having fun. It's not a big to do. Having fun equals quality time. So for 18 summers, my dad taught my sister Jill and I how to water ski. And. Excuse me, you're going to see some really blurry photos, because these photos were back in the 1800s, okay? So we were taught how to water ski by my dad. And my dad took all these photos of us water skiing and doing these water sports. And now it's come full circle and the tables have turned because now he is out water skiing all of us, and we are now able to take photos of him doing all these water sports. My dad taught me how to fish. I didn't particularly like fishing, but I like being with him. It was quality time and times again, full circle. I still don't really like fishing, but I like being with him. And the other thing is, my dad would take us on trips, as you heard, he was speaking at these meetings, and he would take us one at a time. And I remember going to these meetings and being able to watch him on stage. And now times have changed. I've gotten older, and now he's letting me, even today, share the stage. And we even do virtual. We do silly virtual webinars and trainings on Zoom together. And one thing that has changed, though, I will say, when I was younger, I got a lot of comments like, oh, that's so sweet, a dad and daughter. Like, how nice that you get to be with your dad now. Things have changed. I've gotten a lot older, so now I get a lot of comments. I don't get the dad comments. I get a lot of. So how long have you two been together?

Huh?

Yeah, he took us to Big Surf, which, for those of you live here in Arizona, it's a wave manufacturer. It's a manufactured wave pool. And it was so much fun until it wasn't right. Until it wasn't. Until I hit the rocks and skinned my legs and there was blood everywhere. But the point is, it doesn't have to go as planned because that day there was a lot of tragedy. There was a lot of tears and there was a lot of blood, and mom was not happy. But it's probably one of the most common memories that we tell. So it's A it doesn't have to go as planned. Importance of traveling light. This is another tip I learned from my dad. Wow. Travel very, very light. Okay. Especially, Especially when we went to Australia and I remember going, oh, my gosh, we're going to Australia. This is going to be so much fun. We're going to see, you know, kangaroos and koala bears and we're going to build sandcastles on the beach. And we did all of that. But as many of you know, the beaches in Australia are topless beaches. So we have a lot of photos. There's me and the red arrow. All right, so yeah, dad was there for me, but apparently I was there for him. Okay. But I got him back. Don't worry. So dad taught us so many. Well, another thing that he taught us is the importance of fashion. My dad is big on fashion and I have some pictures here. He's really matching. Fashion was the thing that my mom and dad really stressed. Lot of matching fashion.

I love it.

Yeah. And even more matching outfits. Okay. And apparently what happens in Maui doesn't stay in Maui, because this was in our backyard in Arizona. And it wasn't just vacations. It was now our Christmas card as grown adults. But I made sure that we put an end to that when it came to Halloween costumes. I was like, no, we're not doing matching. So we mixed it up little bit. So you teach your kids there's all these things that you're passionate about, about your business, about your life, and you're teaching them all these skills. And when you teach those skills to them and you're there for them, they will be there for you. And so now, again, full circle, tables have turned. Now, I'm happy to say I'm able to teach my dad some things. So I've taught my dad how to air fry. Hey, he's become a really good cook for him. I've taught him how to use Google Ma.

Oops.

We're getting there. We're not quite there, but we're getting there. And I've also taught my dad that when it comes to fashion, the only thing that really should ever be matching are your sunglasses. So this is a picture of my brother in law, my two nephews, which is Joel's grandsons, and my dad and I. Eight years of Genius Network. My dad was a member and we were not. My sister and I were not. And finally we got to. To be involved. And it's been so great hearing and seeing all these years about Genius Network. And we still do things together. The point is make it fun. You figure out what's fun for you and your kid or your grandkid or your niece or nephew. And when you do, do it in those 18 summers, now I'm gonna bring my dad back up.

Well, it's all about relationships, and I hope you got that message from the day that little one is born. Grandkids or your children, you've got those 18 summers. The birthdays go fast, but it's the summers that are going to go the most impactful. And if you do that, you can make it a great day every day.

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