How To Build, Protect and Pass On Your Wealth With Myra Salzer - I Love Marketing With Joe Polish and Dean Jackson Episode #200

I'm dean jackson, he's joe polish, and this is the I love marketing podcast. Hello. This is Joe Polish, and I'm going to be doing an interview with someone who I think has got some really, really unique knowledge and wisdom in an area that I have never really interviewed anybody on. And there's very few people in the world that does what she does. Her name is Myra Salzer, and in 1983, she founded the Wealth Conservancy, Inc. In Boulder, Colorado. She and her colleagues provide wealth coaching and financial planning services to clients nationwide. And she prefers advocating for and empowering who have inherited significant assets and who want to harness their wealth potential and realize their life's greatest ambitions. Myra, how are you?

Very well. How about you?

I'm doing awesome. I'm doing awesome. Well, we're friends, of course, and so we'll just let everyone know that but you. Actually, that's my short bio on you. There's so much more. But really, who are you and what do you do? How would you ever describe yourself?

Well, I think you summed it up really well. We take care of people with very large inheritances, and that's a really different way of looking at money and looking at financial planning, where financial planners are taught, how do you help your clients accumulate wealth? We're working with our clients to not de. Accumulate, to not lose it, to preserve it. And it's a whole different way of looking at life and. And their needs are different. Where one is focused on creating something out of nothing and building a business or whatever, we're focused on some of the issues that don't come up every day for most people, like how do you have a fair prenuptial agreement? Or how can I be a responsible member of the family philanthropic organization? Or how can I not let my wealth interfere with friendships? And so our clients have those challenges that there aren't any textbooks on how to solve those questions or answer those questions.

Right, right. Well, that was interesting. The word you said deaccumulate. Maybe we'll come back to that. But what I want to say in the very beginning of our conversation here is that the vast majority of people that will probably hear this, certainly through my podcast and through my distribution channels, have not inherited their wealth. It's something that you. They may never be in that sort of situation. And for the people out there that do, you're someone who has this deep, deep expertise and knowledge and experience with working with people that have very large net worths in some cases, and helping them not basically screw things up and lose their money and what to do with it and how to think about just how to think about it and how to operate with it. And you have a lot of strategies. But I also know from knowing you and talking with you and Genius Network and everything where we've spent time together, that a lot of your advice would apply to basically anyone, especially people that have children and how do you set your families up in ways. So I want to get into all those sort of conversations. So before we kind of jump into some of the specifics, describe your company, Wealth Conservancy Inc. What who seeks it out? How do people find you? What is it all about? How long you been doing it? All that sort of stuff. I know I mentioned since 1983, but I'd like to get your perspective on it.

I have a little boutique and I don't know how people find us because we're persons de confiance. We are so anonymous that most people can't even imagine that we exist. They don't know to look up the Wealth Conservancy because we fly under the radar and we have to for the sake of our clients. And so we're kind of lonely players. And actually that's a challenge for us. How do we target and find clients? They don't all play polo and there is no Inheritors magazine. And so it's definitely a challenge.

Yes. Well, certainly there's referability. What made you identify this group of people, these individuals? What caused you to start this organization and become one of the world's top experts in helping them?

Well, I did grow up in an environment where I was surrounded by people with very. Well, I went to a girls private boarding school. I went to school with George C. Scott's daughter and Bert Lancaster's daughter and Pat Boone's four daughters and Robert Mitchum's daughter. And so I grew up around that and I was one of the poor relations and remember my own relationship with people who had money and I had opinions and stereotypes and would even date people because of their money. And now I feel so terrible about it because it's so wrong, but it's so common. In fact, I even do workshops for inheritors. And one of the exercises we do is, okay, let's for the fun of it, stereotype rich people versus poor people. And you know, the stereotypes for poor people are they work hard and they bowl for fun and they drink beer and you know, they have beater cars. Whereas rich people, they all play polo and they drink good wines and, you know, they drive Mercedes and BMWs. And so they even stereotype themselves. It's not, you know, it's not accurate, number one.

Right.

At least for the people I work with. And so I guess through guilt is what made me get started, because I appreciated the challenges that they face with those stereotypes. They just can't hide easily.

Yeah. That's very interesting that you say that to the stereotypes, because, you know, I have a lot of wealthy friends, and I have a lot who are not, and I just have a lot of different relationships. And what people actually think about wealthy people and what is the reality of it are two different things. And vice versa. I mean, it is. People. People have all kinds of judgments. So since. Since your focus is on money, I actually want to ask you some questions about money. One question I have for you is, how do you personally think about money? For example, what does money mean and what is it to you personally?

Well, I happen to love it. I think it's a great tool, and that's what it is. It's a tool. Dan Sullivan of Strategic Coach has said many times, if you have enough money to solve a problem, you don't have a problem. It's so true. And so how do you deploy this tool to solve problems, to enhance the quality of your life, to maximize what it is for you, rather than to be burdened by it or in golden handcuffs because of it?

How many people with like. So when you say the term golden handcuffs, that's always an interesting term to me. I also like prisons with golden bars, and I've seen a lot of that. And it makes me think of a conversation I had with a famous actor who was talking about another famous actor who was outed for being an alcoholic and was on the COVID of magazines with his shirt off in front of a bar and a real famous guy. I won't bring it up now. I've talked about it in greater depth on previous podcasts and stuff that I've done. But he said that if you get into the entertainment business without knowing who you are, it will misinform you. And I almost think of that as people that were just born into money. Another thing, quote Dan Sullivan, he said, some people that were born on third base and think they hit a triple. And so when people get into these traps, is it because no one ever taught them strategies? Was it bad upbringing, or did they just have a completely skewed opinion on what money is? Or not even thinking of it as a tool? I mean, obviously, it's probably pieces of all of those things I mentioned. And more. But what are your thoughts on how that occurs?

If I can rephrase what I think your question is, how do people respond to their own money and how does it affect them? Is that what you're asking? Well, yes.

And how does it become a golden handcuff situation versus freedom? Because I pursue money, because I want freedom. And in the pursuit of money in my life, my business, my career, I would find myself in either relationship traps or time traps, project traps, obligations in the pursuit of money, where it's like, oh, my God. And then the other flip side of it is where you start owning stuff and then you wake up one day and realize, I don't really own this house or this building or this stuff. It actually owns me. And that would be my version of golden handcuffs. I'm only speaking from my frame of reference, but I'm always fascinated how there are so many people on the planet, they will kill people over money. They will do all kinds of stuff. They will sacrifice their life and some people in jobs and careers doing things they absolutely hate because they need money. And I've seen people that have accumulated a lot and they have less freedom when they have money or at least access to it than when they were broke.

Right. And I think that is a really common way of looking at the lack of freedom that can come with the encumbrances of assets with wealth. But the lack of freedom that I'm referring to with inheritors is different because they're usually given their wealth with terms associated with it, whether it's in trust or they're part of a family operating business, or they're in the sixth generation of a family office. And there's always rules, there's always obligations that have to be fulfilled. And they aren't free to just walk away from it even if they wanted to. They couldn't even if they decided, okay, I don't need this money, I'm going to support myself or whatever. They don't have that freedom. And so as you people like you, who are the wealth creators, are thinking about, how do you leave this to your heirs so that you're not taking away their own freedom, rather than focusing on estate tax minimization or preservation for the next 300 years, focus on how do you give this in a way that it's a tool for them, just like it was a tool for you?

Gotcha. Gotcha. Well, so you use the term wealth creators. What are some of the differences between wealth creators and people who inherit money? I mean, what are the. I mean, you obviously know both. So what are the differences?

I would say the huge, screaming, overwhelming one word difference is confidence.

Hmm. Confidence.

Creator has been able to learn from mistakes, has experienced failures, has gotten back up and tried again, and oftentimes the. The heir has not had the opportunity to fail. I know that might sound like an oxymoron, but it's so important. And even when an heir accomplishes a lot, they don't give themselves the same degree of credit because, oh, it was easier for them because they had the tool to support their efforts. For example, I worked with three Olympiads, one of whom gold medaled, a gold medalist. You don't get a gold medal in any sport without really, really, really hard work. And she didn't give herself the same degree of credit that another gold medalist probably would have because, you know, she's an heiress and she had tutors in tow and was able to travel the world with her coaches and, and learn to compete. So it doesn't count as much. Yeah. Starting on third base, she hit the home run and feels like it doesn't count.

Right. So how much of your work with heirs, with inheritors, is really about their own psychology versus money strategies and business strategies and tax strategies and the whole group of individuals that, as a team, your company helps connect them with to help them. How much of this is just mental versus business strategy?

I would say 50. 50. In a nutshell, we have two tracks, and it's the wealth coaching track and the financial planning investment management track. And we have expertise in both areas and we outsource in both areas. And It's. I would say 50. 50.

Yeah. What I'd like to do, I'd like to have you go a little bit deeper on what are some of the challenges or problems that people face when it comes to inheriting money, and what are some of the. The specific ways that you help solve them?

I think one of the challenges is sense of isolation that the inheritor will feel almost immediately because of the stereotypes, because people expect them to be elated and, and to change their life. And sudden money has so many strings, I should say. So many expectations is really the word that I'm looking for. And what happens when someone inherits a lot or receives a lot, or there's a big life change that they didn't have control over is their life changes and they can't go back. And as a result of that, they experience a sense of loss. Their life will never be what it was, and they have to go through a mourning process, just like anyone who loses who has a loss in their life. And if they don't give themselves permission to go through that mourning process, they're going to make bad decisions. And so as Susan Bradley from the Sudden Money Institute recommends, to have this decision free zone to identify only the decisions that absolutely have to be made and put everything else off so that you can give yourself that permission to go through the mourning process. And it's counterintuitive.

Yeah, no, definitely. It definitely is counterintuitive. I would imagine that's really, really hard for a lot of people in that situation to wrap their hands around their head around, especially from like you mentioned earlier, with confidence. And I think most people probably, be it envy, jealousy, misunderstanding, could never fathom why that should be a difficult situation. You're like, oh, you got all this money now and that sort of thing, because they're only seeing it from that perspective. So how do you encourage so when someone's, so someone's in that position, what are some of the, the first things that you do? I mean, usually people don't find you right at that point in time. They probably, I would imagine most of your clients are finding you not in the preparation stages. But you know, I might be spiraling downward or I'm hemorrhaging money or I just don't know what the hell I'm doing. I mean, at what stage do most people find you or do you come in to help?

Oftentimes it's shortly after an event. Whether it's an event of someone dying or a trust terminating or a divorce because of the money or a death in the family that then precipitates their need to do their own estate planning. So it's usually an event. Sometimes it's a company buyout, sometimes a family office just falls apart or our client is the black sheep of the family and just isn't fitting in. It varies, but it's usually event triggered.

Right, Right. Okay. Well, let me ask this, probably should have asked a little earlier on, but since most of our listeners are wealth creators, what should they know? How to leave assets to their children, because in a lot of ways you're working with people have had large assets left to them. But the vast majority of people out there, including wealth creators, probably don't even know anywhere near the level of knowledge that you have in this area. So you'd be the perfect person to ask how do you leave things to your children and not screw them up or put them into situations that are traps?

And it's all about parenting. I'm just Convinced of that from any parent from the time their kids are two years old on, it's this dance between how independent do you let them be versus how protective. And you want your 2 year old to fall and get up and fall and get up and then when it's time to learn to ride a bicycle, fall and get up. And that's what creates the backbone. It is what gives you the confidence. And when there's a lot of money at a wealth creator's disposal, it's so easy to buy off problems, to buy off those failures. If you know someone, if a son is having trouble with a boss, you know, don't make it so easy that he can just quit and not do anything or having trouble with the landlord. Don't buy the building for him, for goodness sake, let him get, you know, displaced and evicted if that's what it takes. But if there's, and it has nothing to do with money, it's just people with money have the choice of supporting versus not supporting financially. And if you as the wealth creator can give your children the gift of knowing that they can support themselves, that will go further than anything else. Then how you give it, when you give it, they'll deal with it very differently. If they have that confidence, if they know they can survive, if they know they can make a mistake and land on their feet.

Yeah. So this term I've always liked, which is don't handicap your children by making their lives too easy. Now it just sounds like a good, good quote. And I think that could be applied to employees. I think it could be applied in a lot of situations. And again, I also speak out of ignorance because I don't have children. And so I've not been put in that sort of situation where I could make mistakes that probably many people do. What parenting advice as it relates to money, are there some rules of thumb that you have found across the board? Here are some real errors. I love the whole idea of buying off problems because when you have those options, yeah, you can make things disappear with money, thinking you're really solving it, but in many cases you're just, that may be the problem or creating it. So it's so easy for someone or completely dysfunctional. Because one thing that I have seen with money and wealth is people that have addictions. You can buy whatever vice that your brain can conjure up, that sort of stuff. So are there any like Myra's rules sort of thing of if you do this, you're going to, you know, you're going to be better off than if you don't.

That sort of stuff beyond what I already mentioned as far as giving your children the permission to know that they can do it themselves, to recognize that whatever money you have that you give to them, it's going to amplify who they basically are. So if they tend to have addictions, they're going to be able to be addicted. If they tend to be philanthropists, they can be great philanthropists. If they tend to be athletes, they can be great athletes. They tend to be hypochondriacs. They can be great hypochondriacs. The money just amplifies what's basically there. And as a parent, to not give them the money until what is basically there is what you feel as a parent should be amplified. That's. And it might be at age 12 and it might be at age 50, but I think that's what the job of a parent is.

Right. Okay, so what are some of the myths around inheritance? Because I, you know, I mean, I have my own perspectives on what I think it is, but at the end of the day I'm probably completely clueless. So I'd love to have you share some of the myths around those that inherit wealth and just the whole, you know, the whole process of inheritance.

Oh, I think that one of the myths is that when one does inherit, then their problems go away and actually they just have a whole new set of problems or a whole new set of challenges. I don't want to call it problems because it sounds negative, but their challenges are different and. I think that's one of the biggest myths.

Yeah, like it's just going to solve everything. What about misconceptions that people have about heirs?

I think that we're going back to stereotypes that they're selfish and lazy and self absorbed. And really, if people knew, our clients probably wouldn't realize that they're inheritors. They. The stereotype isn't. The stereo isn't really what exists. And there's a big difference between inheritance of fame and that of money. And a lot of our clients have the luxury of being anonymous and they're hard working and they giving and they have a big responsibility. And how do you teach your own children if you're the fourth generation? How do you teach your own children when you weren't ever taught? So they have a different set of challenges.

Right, right. Is there similarities between. I mean, this is going to sound like a crazy question, but I'm just so curious about it. Are there similarities between lottery winners and inheritors?

Yes. And no. What is a few things that are different? Inheritors oftentimes, more often than not, have family members with whom they can confide, who have identical trusts or this, you know, equal shares in the family operating business or board seats on the family office governance board, that kind of thing. Whereas a lottery winner is jerked out of his or her socioeconomic environment, number one, is not prepared. Number two, and is so alone and is public. Everyone you know, that name is published. Everyone knows they get, you know, marriage proposals and requests for loans and everything all immediately. And so they don't have the luxury of being anonymous. I'll give you a story of one of my clients who was on the board of a philanthropic organization. It was for after school teenagers programs. And she worked really, really hard at her position and loved what she was doing and loved the program. And they were running out of money. And of course, she would have just been mortified if anyone knew that she had the kind of money that she had. So she had the Wealth Conservancy write a check, the rather large check, to just save the organization. And, you know, bam, in one check, the whole problem was solved. And of course, it was given anonymously so no one knew it was her. And at the next board meeting, everyone was like, gleeful, and it was wonderful. The program has changed and everything's great. And now how can we thank this anonymous person? And they thought about sending flowers through the Wealth Conservancy and writing a thank you note and having a toast for them or whatever, doing a video for. And she got assigned the job of writing the thank you note. And it was really quite cute because their view of her would have been entirely different if they knew she was the one who wrote the check.

That is. That is crazy. What did that do for her? How did she feel? I mean.

Oh, she actually. She was so pleased that she could save the day without coming out of the closet.

Did she. Did she ever come out?

No. Oh, no, she will never.

That's great. That is great. What are some of the. I guess it's almost like if you're talking to a surgeon or a police officer or something, you're like, what are the craziest stories that you've ever heard? I'd love to have you describe what happens when things aren't handled properly in a way. So it's instructive to everyone listening that, you know, here's what you can really. Here's some really big mistakes that you can make or that I've seen happen and maybe give an example while simultaneously Protecting the names and who that is. If you're able to speak to any of that, I'd love to have you kind of share either some examples of things that you've seen or just some mistakes that you're fully aware of that happen all the time with Ayers, with people that through the whole process, or just people in general, so that all of our listeners can avoid some of these pitfalls.

I'm going to go back to the main focus that we've already touched on, which is knowing that you can support yourself. And a client of mine who was 40 years old when he moved to America, and he actually moved, he was local. Most of our clients are not, but he was local and he found us. And he was determined to integrate into Boulder on his own and to do it all himself and buy his own house and take care of things. This is a person who had never done laundry, had never cleaned a toilet, you know, didn't know that cars had to be taken to the shop to be serviced. It was just always done for him. And he comes to the United States and he was, he speaks perfect English and we coach him on how to buy a house. And he found a house and, you know, found a realtor to help. And he step by step every day, it was, okay, now you can do this and now you can do that. And, you know, he was eager and he so delved into it and he closed on the house and the welcome wagon came by and said, okay, this is what you need to do to get your phone lines hooked up and your cable hooked up and your trash collected and you're on and on and on. And, you know, he followed each instruction to the letter and checked in with us and made sure he was doing it right. And he was just, you could just see his self esteem get, you know, higher and higher and higher, just doing simple things that he never had an opportunity to do. And it sounds stupid, but it's real. At the end of the third week after moving in, he called me and he said, myra, they said they'd come and pick up the trash every Tuesday and Friday morning. And you know, it's been three weeks and they haven't come yet. And I said, well, why don't we call and find out what's going on? And so we called Western Disposal and we were on a conference call and, you know, we agreed that he would do all the talking and I would only speak up if there was an issue and, or a need. And so he explained, you know, you said you'd Be there on Tuesday and Friday mornings. And, you know, and they got his name and they got his address, and they said to him, well, you know, Mr. So and so, we've been there every Tuesday and Friday morning, and there hasn't been any trash put out at the end of the driveway. Like, oh, the end of the driveway. Okay, okay, I can do that. But I mean, he was not. Is not a stupid person. He's just ignorant in how to navigate the world.

Right?

And so, again, give your kids an opportunity to know that they can do it themselves, because otherwise they're not going to take those risks. I think it was very brave, very courageous of him to go out and try it at age 40, having never done it before and not having. He didn't have to do that. He could have stayed in his comfortable life. That wasn't very stimulating to him. And that takes chutzpah.

That is. That's a great story. You know what's really funny? I don't know if you ever read it, but I have this little book, little Book of Ass Kickers. And I tell you. I tell a story in there about how I was in one of my trips to Necker Island, Richard Branson's island. I was in the kitchen with Richard, and I was talking with him, and I just said, when was the last time you went to a grocery store? And he said, he looks up, he goes, I don't know if I've ever been to a grocery store. I'm like, what are you talking about? How's that even possible? And I made a comment. I said, did you ever have to go get beer for Johnny Rotten and Sid Vicious from the Sex Pistols or anything? He's like, God, I don't ever remember doing that. And I'm sitting there going, this is not even humanly possible. How could. I mean, he's Richard Branson now, so it's probably not easy just to walk around anywhere and go shopping, but I just couldn't fathom that. And I said to him, when's the last time you did laundry? And he looked up, he goes, I don't think I've ever done laundry. And I'm like, what do you mean you've never done laundry? What about, you know, when you were growing up as a kid? He said, no, my mom did my laundry. He goes, joe, you don't do that stuff. He goes, you pay people to do that. And I sat there. It was like the weirdest thing to me. I just could not even imagine it. But, you know, I don't think he was making it up. I mean, it's hard for me to imagine that, but thank God he obviously became a billionaire and learned how to stay wealthy because if he was ever put in a position where he had to do his laundry or cook his meals or things like that, he would probably have some difficulties. But this is not, again, this is not a dumb person. This is a very intelligent person. It's just they're, you know, totally ignorant to that sort of world. So it gave me a completely, you know, different perspective about where people tend to put their energies and their talents and how they actually get through life and how they function and all that. But it was, it was a pretty interesting conversation. I thought it was hysterical.

Yep. Touche.

So let me ask you, you got a really nice testimonial from Peter Buffett, who's one of Warren Buffett's sons, about your book. And so what are some other neat or interesting things that have come out of your work?

I don't know if I'm going to be able to answer that because confidentiality is so number one absolute required. And we really are so guarded. And as a result, our work is pretty lonely. Which is why I need 25k, which is why I need strategic coach, which is why I need the ppi. There's just, I need to get out because we have to be so quiet. And so I think one of the more interesting things is where someone who's seeking fame and wanting growth and wanting marketing is, you know, wants to create spin and get a lot of pr. We really focus on unspin and unpr.

Yeah, yeah.

Well, and I think another thing that makes it interesting is that our wealth coaches have to have their own confidence so that they're not intimidated by the wealth people that they're working with. That really screws up a relationship very quickly when firstly the heir, the inheritor, our clients don't have the confidence themselves. And so there's this disconnect with their own self worth and their own net worth. And then to have an advisor who's intimidated by their wealth, they don't know how to deal with that. So I think that's one of the interesting phenomenon that comes along with our clients and the work we do is that we have to be able to separate our own relationship with money from our clients.

Yeah, that totally makes sense. I mean, especially I could see just total intimidation by some people when you're working with someone who's worth hundreds of millions or billions of dollars and they're like, oh, what actually do. Are a lot of inheritor heirs? Are they taken advantage of by most people in financial services? Or is it out of ignorance or. I mean, are they. I would imagine they're viewed as prey by a lot of people, or is that too far of a stretch?

Oh, no, no, no. I think it's very realistic. And I think financial advisors have a shady reputation that is possibly in many cases deserved. I've seen some pretty gross actions that didn't seem totally kosher to me. And so, yeah, there's this huge fear of making a mistake and trusting the wrong people and being taken advantage of. And that can be paralyzing. Our clients don't want to make big mistakes because they can't earn it back themselves. And that goes right back to the freedom. And so are they free to make those mistakes? Are they free to let their money empower them and, you know, get back up on their feet when there are mistakes? And is it going to reflect badly on them or are they going to be embarrassed? And I think if there's any gift that we could give our clients, it's the gift of learning how to be detached from what other people think.

How do you do that? Oh.

Back to confidence. And I don't know if we're 100% successful at that, but when we're putting situations into perspective that are problems for our clients based on their perception of what other people think, we will point that out to them. That's where the wealth coaching side of the business comes in, versus the financial planning, investment management. I think it's not just for our clients. I think all of us are somewhat preoccupied with what other people think. And if we could just let go of that and be ourselves and not worry about it and be a lot freer.

From a happiness perspective. I don't know any way that you would completely quantify this. People that have inherited wealth versus people that have inherited fame and they have to live in the shadow of someone who seems to have a harder, more difficult time. Whose lives seem to be more challenged? Those with the money or those with fame? Or is it pretty much equal or. There's really no easy way to answer that.

I think both. But more the fame is probably the bigger challenge because speaking and trying to find that anonymity is more difficult when you have a famous family, when you have a famous last name, when you can't, you just can't be anonymous. And so you're on stage all the time and it's exhausting.

Yeah, it has to be. And a lot of People really think they envy those people. And not only are you on stage, but you actually have people that envy you and dislike you and think you're lucky not realizing the dark side of that. What they perceive as luck or advantage or success in many cases is a giant disadvantage for a lot of people. And I've seen that. I mean, I know a lot of people that have, you know, famous parents and you know, how they have to just deal with it, what it's like to live in that world. And the same with people that have money. So the people listening to this, I mean, I'm sure a lot of them would be curious as marketing or reaching heirs. And you know, what should our. Why should our listeners care about reaching or marketing to people in your target market? Although not easily identifiable, what are things that, if you could answer it, what would a person like me, for instance, I sell a very high level discussion group called Genius Network to people that have a lot of money. And I have a couple people in the group that have actually were born into large quantities of money. I mean, one guy actually joined after he inherited $20 million. And one of the reasons he joined is he's like, I want to make sure I don't lose it. That was a new one for me at the time. That was several years ago. But why should our listeners care and what should they know about marketing to ay?

Well, the obvious answer is heirs have money. And so you want to market to people who have money. And heirs have time. Oftentimes they have time and they have flexibility. And so when you can find them, when you can earn their trust, when you can provide a service that they can use, whether it's something like Bluefish or something like Genius Network, what it does is, and this is really important, what it does is it gives them community. And that's not something they have without some sort of outside structure, oftentimes other than family.

Yep, you're right. I mean, knowing what I do for a living, I think that's one of the biggest appeals to what it is I do is just a community of people where they can come into that room and they realize, wow, you know, there's other people that are in my situation, similar situations, think like me, have aspirations, and I can sit down and talk about what is important to me and what I want in my life and not be judged or scolded or misunderstood or in some cases ridiculed for my ambition. And it's a lonely world for a lot of people that a lot of the world thinks just have success handed to them on a silver platter. And it's, it's really not that way at all. And so I think you're, you're absolutely right with the community. I mean, do you have any suggestions on how would people reach them? I mean, it seems, you know, that's your biggest. That's your biggest challenge, right?

Indeed it is. Yeah. They're, they. Our experience is that there's a draw to be anonymous and there's a draw to blend in and a draw to not be labeled an inheritor, as they don't want those stereotypes where you might know of a few of your members who are inheritors. I wouldn't be surprised if there are several others that you don't know about because they are maintaining that anonymity.

Right, right. Just like the story you told earlier. So I want to ask you some strategies, like if you had to share your best three or four strategies for preserving wealth, once someone has inherited it or even made it, you know, for people that are wealth creators, what would those strategies be?

You know, there's a lot of emphasis on how do you make money last for many generations? How do you debunk the shirt sleeves to shirt sleeve in three generations manifesto that seems to be so prevalent? And it is, and for good reason. And should the goal be preservation for many, many, many, many generations, or should the goal be maximum freedom? And I think that's a common goal for every heir and for every entrepreneur and for everybody is maximum freedom. And it doesn't take rocket science to preserve wealth. My grandmother, who was a Holocaust refugee, came to the United States poor, poor, poor. She was a millinery, and she had just one rule, and that one rule was, for every dollar you make, save 10 cents. And she died owning a house in Beverly Hills. Whereas my father, who was also a Holocaust refugee, was a brilliant man. He went to mit, was instrumental in developing the first digital computer for his PhD thesis. He was at the ground floor of Magnavox. He was at the ground floor of trw. He had every opportunity and he always was looking for the next sexy big deal. And he, he didn't save that 10 cents on every dollar he earned. So it's not, again, rocket science. It's really easy. Just spend less than you make. That's all it takes.

Right? That's a good one. And, you know, that's actually worked very well for me too. I mean, Even in my 20s, I was, you know, there's a couple things that I did that I think served me well. Buying life insurance When I didn't even have anyone to really leave it to. But just the whole mindset of getting in that mode, it's not even about life insurance. It's just about insurance isn't for sale when you need it most. So always protecting myself there, always putting money away automatically. I've been doing that for years. And I've had situations where I needed access to cash, but because I had saved it and I had made that a process, I have people that have companies that are generating multiples of what my business had generated or has generated, but I would have more access to cash than they did because of those sort of habits that were instilled early on that I learned and that I took action on. A lot of times, just the consistency with things that are just sound. Common sense is important, but most people, they don't do it. What else, what else would you recommend as a strategy?

The rest is really common sense. Diversify. Minimize your taxes and identify who you are with what you have.

What about the topic of giving, philanthropy? How do you deal with that topic when it comes to inherited wealth?

I loved that NK talk you did with Dan where you really debunked the giving back term because it's so true. And many of our clients or people with inherited wealth also inherit a family philanthropic organization. For example, a friend of mine, for example, was executive director of his family's over a billion dollar foundation. And you know, he was on the COVID of Philanthropy magazine. And I have to wonder, I don't consider him a philanthropist. He's an executive director of a philanthropic organization. And so the ability to write a check does not ipso facto makes someone a philanthropist. And philanthropy is a wonderful way for clients, for inheritors, to build that community we were talking about earlier. And by actually being philanthropic, by actually there's a wonderful book out called Volunteer Vacations. I don't remember the author. And he organizes and has suggestions of all these endeavors, places you can go and things that you can do with a philanthropic bent. And whether it's building houses in Africa or cleaning latrines in South America or whatever, it's all oriented towards really the sweat equity of philanthropy. And that is that to me is more philanthropy than just writing the check. Did I answer the question?

Oh, yeah, yeah. No, that's great. Actually, I would have toplug joevolunteer.com. something where someone took one of my ideas about when I was in a nursing home and saw a lonely person, older person, that. And it just really made me think, man, how many people are out there? Because My friend Janice was having a gratitude dinner for her husband, who recently passed away, and he was still alive at the time. This was just a couple months ago, and she was doing this gratitude dinner. And I saw this person in a nursing home who was just alone. And I was talking to my girlfriend and said, man, there's got to be a way to use technology to link people that want to volunteer with organs, organizations in places that need them without all of the bureaucracy that prevents it from happening. And how do they even find each other? So it almost becomes like Uber for volunteers. And this guy heard me talk about it on one of my podcasts, a guy named Chip Franks. And he built Joe volunteer dot com. And it's not. There's no intention of making money off of this. It's just to help link people that want to volunteer with other people. But it's really, really about putting that effort for. So that brought it up there. That was kind of a little tangent, but it made me just want to plug that because I thought it was cool. There are a lot of people with access to resources and funds and money that do great things in the world as a result of it. But to go back to the point, it is really about giving, not giving back. And I imagine a lot of people that inherit their wealth, there's a lot of parasites that come out of the woodworks and try to guilt them into, oh, you should, you know, donate to this or give to that. In a lot of ways, they probably take advantage of these people.

You used. The definitive word is guilt. If the check is written because of a guilty feeling, then it certainly isn't philanthropy. And Lynne Twist, in her book the Soul of Money, talks a lot about giving with soul. And that's a really important component in the gift. Otherwise, it's really not a gift.

Yeah, exactly. And Lynn is a friend of mine, so that's cool. Yeah.

So.

I'm just going to ask you a few more questions and then we'll give people some resources because you've written some books about this whole topic, too. So what should someone who's inherited wealth watch out for that we've not discussed that. We've not mentioned so far.

I think if making those unnecessary changes shortly after receiving money, making those decisions before you've gone through the mourning process is something definitely to avoid. To honor that decision. Free zone. To not be seduced by the sizzle of a great deal or seduced by being part of a quick community that really is more interested in your money than in you and. But avoid Letting your wealth boost your own self esteem. Don't buy rounds for everyone in the bar because you want to buy them friendship. And that's a mistake I've seen is boosting self esteem by spending money.

I imagine that is a big one because it's really. That probably doesn't boost your self esteem at all. All it does is create probably a situation where a lot of people that have entitlement attitudes want to hang around you a lot. So regarding family issues, how do you suggest people navigate the family issues that could come with wealth either inherited or you know, wealth creatives that is earned.

Interesting. I went to a postgraduate program for the Bowen center for Family Systems Theory and there are, you know, families are, you know, are families and they're going to be weird dynamics no matter what, no matter how much money. And understanding how, how family systems work is really insightful in terms of how to work with individuals within the family. But there's also some, maybe a handful of people across the country who work with families of wealth on the whole. Family meetings, they do family retreats and they come up with a mission statement and a purpose for families of wealth. So I don't know, did I veer from the question? What was the question?

Just like any family issues that someone has that comes with wealth, for instance, to give you a specific one, family members or friends that are asking you for money. How do you, how do you navigate jealous relatives? How do you navigate people that just expect you to solve some of their problems because you have money that could solve their problems or just the complexity of extreme things, lawsuits. It's my money, I deserve this, I deserve that. Just those sort of issues.

Well, the inheritor's family is usually in the same position as the inheritor. So those dynamics don't come up. It's with the married intuit family that it does and that's definitely a challenge. How do you have a fair marital agreement? How do you deal with the non moneyed spouse's family and what are those balances and what are the expectations? And. It's interesting, it seems to me that most of my married clients, certainly this isn't a rule, but I would say the majority of our clients who are married are the non moneyed spouses. Family is a more functional family in general. And that just seems to be, you know, that is what is an attractant. Not the only thing obviously, but one of the attractants of the non moneyed spouse is the, the inheritor gets to be part of a normal family, right?

Well, yeah, because they're probably, I'm sure you have many stories that you'll probably keep anonymous of the crazy making that takes place in a lot of families. You said deaccumulate very early on in the beginning of this talk about that, about that. Because one of the biggest things that you do is protect people from making bad decisions that cause them to lose their money. So what could you say about that?

I think losing some money, losing a reasonable amount of money is not the end of the world. And I think that if we can give our clients the space to really focus on what's important to them rather than how not to lose and how to let their wealth be a tool for them rather than a burden to them and not look at the day to day and not, I mean, what the stock market is doing today or whatever, but to look at that long term focus and what's important and how do you take that, what's important in the long term future and how do you act on that now? And it's never the stock market. It's, you know, it's how do you plant the seeds for that long term freedom, for that long term gratification. And so prevention of loss can't be the focus. It can't be always worrying about the accumulation and they are painfully aware that this could be it, that mom's not going to die again, that whatever trust they have is what they're going to have or whatever. And so I think the best way I can facilitate their happiness is to not focus on the accumulation or deaccumulation, but rather on them and their own personal growth and money is there to support them in that effort?

No. That's good. That's good. So you've written some books. I'm going to ask you about your books in just a moment, but I want to ask you is there any idea top or question that we haven't discussed yet, but we should because it would be super valuable for someone listening to this.

I think what I'd like to ask the listeners is to ask yourself what are your own stereotypes about people with money, especially people who didn't earn it themselves, and question whether your own stereotypes are fair or not. Inheritors are an underrepresented group and they don't have an advocate and, and there are stereotypes that I would love for your listeners to just question, just ask yourself what is, what are your ideas of who inheritors are and would you be open minded about that?

Right. No, that's good, that's good exercise because you, the more you actually understand the mindset of different individuals, or at least think about it, you'll approach them differently. You'll have more compassion. And certainly speaking as a person who makes the majority of their living as a marketer, as a storyteller, and helping other people do the same thing, it's more about psychology than it is anything else. And the more you understand what drives and motivates people and what drives and motivates yourself, I think the easier it is to create and understand the value that you provide in the world and then link other people with that in a way that they will actually pay you for it and associate with you and all that sort of stuff. Very good. Myra, you've written a few books for inheritors. What are they? And why did you write these books? And how do people. How do people get them?

Well, thanks for asking. Yes, three main books. The first one, the Inheritor's Sherpa, is a workbook on developing accomplishment skills, which might sound pretty simple, but for an heir who's never had to accomplish anything, these are. It's a workbook to help them learn those accomplishment skills. The second book is Living Richly. And what that book does is it follows three amalgamated errors. These are amalgamations of clients, and all with completely different circumstances. One is third generation, one is seventh generation, and one in between, and very different upbringing. And it follows them through the process of how they receive their money and how they learned to integrate with their wealth. And the final book, which is called the Cabin, is a story, a true story about two gentlemen who invested in a technology that could potentially change the planet for the good. And this is a technology that could have as much impact as the microchip does. And. And they, along with many, many, many other investors who mostly are friends and family, or at least we built the cabin for them, will, if this technology proves to be what they expect it to be, will simultaneously enjoy a liquidity event that will essentially change every single investor's life. And it will be almost like their inheritors, because they'll be jerked out of their current financial position. Even if they're millionaires now, they're going to be billionaires. And what we've done is we envisioned this, what we're calling a family of affinity office to provide services to meet the needs of these investors. And it's everything from, of course, the investment management and estate planning to education. We'll have camps for the kids to offshore philanthropic organizations and. The concierge services that will enable them to stay anonymous and have community. And it's just going to be a wonderful, wonderful organization. And if this happens, the Wealth Conservancy will go from this boutique of eight of us to a firm with hundreds of employees. Who knows? But this is the book about the vision of that.

Wow. Well, I've not read the Cabin, so I actually want to read it now. Hearing you even say that, that's like, huh, this sounds very interesting. So where do people go to learn more about this, get your books and even work with you and your firm if they would like?

Pretty easy. My name is Myra Salzer and you can Google me. That's S A L Z E R. And the website is www.twcinc.org.

Twc Inc. As in the Wealth Conservancy Inc.org.

Exactly.

Perfect. Perfect. Any famous last words?

Thank you. Thank you for your interest. I think obviously it's a topic I'm passionate about and committed to, and I'm really, really grateful that you gave it this exposure. I'm very.

Yeah, absolutely. Yeah. What you're doing is very unique, very much needed by a lot of people. And also we've had many conversations about communication which we didn't even get into on this interview. But I just want to encourage anyone, if, you know anyone in the world that has inherited money or will be doing it soon, it would probably be good to let them know about Myra. It could probably help prevent a lot of pain and probably the wastage or expenditure or theft of their assets and resources in many cases. And hopefully this made you think about money, your children, and your own life. And if you want more, then I recommend reading Myra's books. And I'd love to hear the comments of this interview wherever I post it, because I'll probably post this on different versions of my podcast and even make it a bonus episode on my marketing podcast just so people can hear this. And we'll go from there. So, Myra, as always, it's great talking with you. Thank you so much for sharing your knowledge and look forward to hearing what our listeners have to say. So thank you and have a great day.

And you as well. Thank you, Joe. Sincerely, thank you.

Sam.