Episode 035 - Me Before We

This is In Brief. Let's get to it. Hello, and welcome back to the In Brief podcast, where we take one subject every week, talk about it for about 5 minutes, and hopefully give you a new perspective going into a new week. I'm Jordana. I'm the CEO of the Recon Network. And this week, we're talking about Prioritizing yourself. Now, if you're anything like me, the idea of putting yourself first makes you cringe a little bit. Early on, most of us are taught that it's more important to consider others first and put our own needs after those around us. Even in the military, you learn to operate as a unit, to put the needs of the whole over your own toward the overall mission. Unfortunately, we never unlearn that idea, and it ends up coming back to bite us in the butt because we will do literally anything before taking care of our own needs. We'll run errands for someone else, lend a shoulder to cry on, take on extra to lighten the load at work, all while ignoring the basic things that we need ourselves. Why? Well, there are a few reasons. Sometimes we feel like we don't have time to do the things that we need to do for ourselves, like exercise or time to meditate or reflect. We may feel like taking time for ourselves and just for ourselves is selfish, and so we end up feeling guilty. Or we may be facing other challenges and don't realize the importance of also making time to take care of ourselves. Now, in transition, all of these things are amplified. There are a lot of things happening, a lot of moving parts, and a lot of change going on in a short amount of time to a number of different areas in our lives. And because of that, we can feel overwhelmed with things to do and as a result, ignore the things that we need ourselves in order to survive and thrive. And in the end, we pay for it. Bad physical health, poor mental health, flailing relationships. All of these are risks we take when we ignore taking care of ourselves and prioritize the needs of others instead. So what do we do? How do we balance the need to take care of ourselves while not giving up on the needs of those around us or the things that we need to do to move forward in our life and our relationships? Fortunately, there's a few things that can help us achieve a better balance in this area without tipping the scales too far in one direction or the other. First of all, identify your own personal needs. What are the things that you need to do in order to feel physically and mentally healthy? Once you know what your needs are, you can start to make a plan for how to meet them. If that's a focus on your physical health, you might make a new exercise plan that works around other obligations or a new schedule. If you're concerned about mental health, you might be able to set aside some time where you can reflect, read, or just jot down your thoughts. Whatever it is, it's always easier to address if you know what it is. Second, learn to say no. Not everything is mission critical, even if it feels like it is. Learn how to identify what is critical to your progress and relationships and what isn't, and then learn to let that go without the weight of guilt attached. And finally, don't be afraid to ask for help. If it was possible to do everything yourself, you wouldn't need a community, and that's an unrealistic place to be for a human. Identify your own support network, who is in it, and their specific strengths and weaknesses, and make a plan of action should you need someone in your corner. Remember, self-care isn't just a good idea during transition, or really any other time. It's essential. But by prioritizing your own well-being, you're not tipping the scales to favor yourself. You're simply providing yourself the energy and care you need to keep making progress and setting yourself up for success in the long run.