Wilder Still | feat. Roots & Refuge | Full Episode

Love you. Have a good day. Good morning, guys. What's up? Welcome back to Roots and Refuge Farm. My name is Jess. Now, normally this is what I do. I hold a camera and I open a door and share a seat at the table of my life with you. But this can be a little bit difficult, you know, sometimes trying to be present trying to get work done, trying to tell a good story. It's hard when you're also trying to be a cameraman and a producer and a director all in one. I'm going to hand this off to these guys and I'm just going to live my life. All right. We good? So we live in South Carolina now, and it's been a pretty wild few months of transition, but it's starting to feel like home, like we live here. It's, it's been a few whirlwind months. There's been so much change. It's definitely been a lot of hard work, but we knew when we made this move that we were literally like digging up the root system of our life and transplanting it. It was not going to be the kind of thing that was a trial run or a test. We were, we were going. It's a really interesting dynamic when you are a content creator and a homesteader, because the very nature of homesteading is simplicity, slowing down, unplugging. Ladies, did you give me any eggs this morning? The very nature of content creation is connection, awareness with a viewer, sharing with a viewer. And that is something that for many years I've desired to do. I felt like it was a calling on our life to live in Glass House and just model family and chasing your dreams. And yes, in our case, homesteading. And it is a weird line to walk because when I'm making YouTube videos, people don't quite understand that there's production behind that. And so there are these tiny little discrepancies that I can't quite convey. I wish that there had been a camera rolling and somebody else telling the story when I was sitting at my piano and nobody knew our name. I wish somebody had been there telling the story when I was on my back porch writing in my journal and thought, I think I'm supposed to do a YouTube channel. We want to bring the influence that we feel like has been put on our life and just plant it here in a region. I am so certain that this thing is going to play out in such a beautiful, miraculous way that I was like, hey, I think we need a story. I think we need this documented because, you know, years from now somebody's going to look back on that and go, wow, that's what, that's what can happen whenever you, whenever you dream and you just do the next right thing that's in front of you. We weren't 100% sure how exactly it was going to work out, but we just decided let's go for it. We shot the pilot, we presented it to our viewers, and they got behind it in such a massive way that now we get to spend this next year showing and telling the story of our start here in our new home, in our new state, and our new life. I pretty much handle our media, and so people really see a lot of me, but our farm would not happen if it weren't for Jeremiah. Jeremiah, sweet Maya, as I like to call him, this year has been his time to shine. He is brilliant when it comes to infrastructure and order and getting things right. He's just very good at doing things in excellence. Maya came out and bought this property. I didn't even see it. He brought me out months later and showed me our new farm. I had never even been here before. And this year has been a lot of that. Maya has handled the logistics. He made multiple trips out here and set things up before I had ever really spent much time here. But he had been out here for months. We spent most of the summer apart because he was out here working and getting it ready. And since being here, I have watched him come alive.

We're going to head down and check out the pigs. I got to check on the two breeder mamas that should be having babies any day. These are the two, uh, pregnant mamas. They're the Mangalitsa breed that we raise on our farm. She should have had her piglets already. I don't think anything's wrong. I think she's just taking longer than when we were anticipating. I moved them out here, one, to get them away from the other pigs because I don't know how they're going to behave with piglets. I know that these two mamas won't hurt each other or each other's kids. I put them on this particular space because this is actually going to be the future site of a high tunnel greenhouse. So we built the pen the exact size of the greenhouse and we're letting them tear the grass up and fertilize it a little bit. So we've got a small herd of goats. We downsized when we got here. We actually found someone to take a good portion of our herd. We've got 3 alpacas on the farm. They're really just novelty. Jessica has always wanted alpacas and so we have have them and they're in their older age. And so they're basically just retired. We're not going to breed them or do anything with them. They're just going to live out the rest of their days, however many that is. You better quit. He's probably not going to stop. All right. The turkeys mostly have just been free-ranging, but they're not hurting for food with this much acreage. There's lots of grass and stuff to peck through and bugs to eat, so they're doing fine. At some point, I'll probably get something like a mobile turkey house that I can move around and keep them contained within like a mobile netting. This is our mobile laying flock. We're going to move them around on different grass for their benefit and for the soil and the health of the grass that's being grown. When me and Jessica first started doing chickens, I was so adamant that we were going to do like a static coop. And now that I've built a Chickshaw and used it, like, I won't ever keep chickens any other way. They've been on this for a few days, so we're going to set up a new set of netting and then they'll probably just follow the feed bucket of the— of their pellets over to the new spot. This doesn't always go as planned. We got some of them. Come on, ladies, come on down. Wes, you had one job. That should have been a lot simpler than it was. Now they're all safely in their new spot. Next time I will definitely remember to shut the door off because now I'm sweaty.

This is the time of year that's super busy and it, it's also beautiful. I love this time of year. Right now our goal is to get as prepared as possible for spring so that when we are starting with that blank slate of spring, we have barns ready, we have garden spaces prepared, we have our driveways all in and the paths that we need all in. We are breeding our animals right now, so we've got the buck in with the goat, so we'll have spring kids. We're expecting piglets. And right now we are just kind of on the brink of a lot of new life and preparing for new life in the spring. We did decide to do one more round of meat chickens. It's nicer to do that when it's cool outside versus doing it in the very heat of the summer, so we usually do that in spring and fall. Now we have these birds on grass, and we will be moving them in these electric netting fences, and we'll move them every couple of days to new grass. They're powered by solar panels, and that makes them super mobile because we don't have to worry about where we're going to plug them in. And obviously that's also energy efficient because we're not having to pay for power. By moving them every day, we are growing our birds. They're able to forage, they're able to eat grass and insects, which makes for healthy, happy birds. And also we are growing our grass. So on a regenerative farm, your grass is one of your greatest commodities. Your grass and your soil, keeping those healthy means that everything else on your farm is going to be able to thrive. On that grass and in that soil. And by moving these birds every couple days, they're fertilizing it, and the grass that they leave behind is going to be super lush.

This is really the first big food-producing move we're making after getting to South Carolina.

One of the things that's so valuable to me about what we do is being able to be involved from the very beginning with the meat that we're going to consume. And we have people ask us all the time, how, as an animal lover, are you able to raise something, care for it, look it in its eye, and then use it for meat? And I do that whole process because I am an animal lover, because to me there's so much more kindness in taking an interest and actually caring for something from this stage rather than just consuming it whenever that's the need that you have. So for me, if I wasn't going to take this level of responsibility, I just wouldn't eat meat. Now, these birds right now just came out of a brooder, and so they look kind of, uh, sad, you know. They look really wet. They've never had a need biologically to grow full feathers. But the thing is, we're now introducing them at 2 weeks old to the grass where they're going to live out in the sunshine eating bugs and scratching around on new grass every day. And they'll feather out, they'll move, they'll walk, and they'll live a healthy life. Whereas battery-raised birds would stay looking like this or worse until the day that they die for someone to eat. Oh, this to me, this is kindness. This is loving animals. And it is hard, it's costly, but you know, a lot of times the things that are worthwhile, they cost something. Whereas this felt like raw land 2 months ago, it feels like a farm now. Like, you go outside, you hear the rooster crow, there's baby chicks, meat chicks all in their fence, and the laying hens, and piglets are on the way, and the goats are breeding, and we've got garden spaces preparing. I've got a little bit of a fall garden planted. I'm picking lettuce. We're bringing a new dairy cow home here in a couple weeks, and I'm so excited about that. And it's like, I have a farm again. It's so nice. And every single week we knock these projects off the list that make it more and more of a farm. Having my hands in the soil is like one of my most favorite feelings in the world. It's extremely therapeutic. We fell in love with South Carolina in a way that I just can't even really express. We're right outside Batesburg, Leesville, South Carolina. It's a really small town. Its population, about 5,000. There's an old downtown area. There's so much history here, and I'm so wooed by it. It's just so romantic to me, and the history— I just feel like this whole town is full of stories, and they're just waiting on somebody to care enough about them to learn them and tell them and add to them. From the very beginning of wanting to come to this area, we would drive down this little downtown area. It's just a couple of blocks and we would see all these empty stores and we would say, well, what would it look like for these to be full of life? And we know we want to own a coffee shop and a roasting company. We know we want to own a homesteading mercantile where people can come. But I don't just drive through here looking for where our dream's going to go. I imagine this whole place full of life and lots of dreams coming true here.

Like, when I first stepped foot on our now homestead property, there was just something that happened. There was a— it moved me, like I felt it. And so we pursued it and we were able to, you know, obtain that portion of the dream. And so I think right now what we're waiting on is for that property to jump out and be like, okay, you know, it moved us and then follow that through into realizing it.

I see legacy as something that goes both ways. There are so many dreams that have been recognized and so many dreams that haven't been fulfilled yet. And all of that, it's not just about our story. I just think, well, what if we put down our roots here and what if we bear our fruit here and whatever that's going to bring, how many more people could that benefit? You filming me eat? Pretty good? Yeah. You got to ration these things. One of our fundraising efforts in launching the pilot was that we decided to have an event. Justin called me one day and he said, how do you feel about having people at your house? I was like, I love having people at my house. He's like, how do you feel about having a couple hundred people at your house for an event next year at your new farm. And I was like, oh, and I'm like, yeah, I think we could do that. And we start talking about it, and it just— I see it instantly. I'm like, okay, there's nothing like having somebody over that makes you do the dishes. There's nothing like having somebody over that makes you get in the nooks and crannies and get things clean and go ahead and paint that thing you meant to and hang that picture you meant to. What a better way than to allow some of our faithful viewers and supporters to come over. So we're going to have a one-day event. Um, Justin and Rebecca are going to come down. We're going to do like a Q&A panel with them. And, uh, yeah, we're gonna have a bunch of people come and see our farm. So I'm hoping by next spring when they come, it'll be ready for— to receive them. I think probably the hardest part of our transition is prioritizing being emotionally available for our children because our children are transitioning. It's the largest change that they've ever gone through in their life. They amaze me with their resilience. Even more, they amaze me with how Holy, they believe what we tell them. And when we say, hey, we're doing this because of legacy and we're doing this because when you're adults, we're going to have all the opportunity in the world to give to you, they believe us and they're just in. And it's really amazing how many people in the world believe us, but there's nothing as valuable our babies, saying, okay, we'll move, we'll start a new school, we'll make new friends, really just embracing this process of discomfort. And they have done it so wholeheartedly. And they have chosen this with us. It's not something that they came along kicking and screaming. They have chosen it with excitement They come home and say, "Isn't it going to be cool when we build this? Isn't it going to be cool when we have that?" You know, my son Jackson, we were driving through town the other day, he's like, "I am really ready for you to get a coffee shop open." Because he's like, "It's going to be so cool." And they just, they so believe us. And I don't think there's much that makes me feel more like we're doing it right than that. Their faith in us is extremely humbling. You want to kiss him? Uh, sure. Wait, in the mouth? Kiss and release. There you go. Ah, that felt good! The tension for me and having so many projects and so much that has to be done and beautiful things that I love and that I'm dreaming of, is that I don't want to lose the wonder and the passion of this slow and simple life. And there are times that I think, can I actually just be a person that wakes up and makes a loaf of bread and takes a cup of coffee outside and milks the cow and works in the garden. And it takes a determination that that little girl in me that desperately wanted a farm still gets to have a seat at the table, even when we build this long table for so many people to take a seat at. And while we're building this legacy, the thing more than anything that I have to keep at the forefront is that being wooed by this farm is what got us here in the first place. This being a desire and a passion is why we're holding it in our hands, and it cannot become about the work. We have to stay seated at the table, and that's hard. But as we dive off into the deep end of building this legacy, more than anything, I'm saying, Jess, don't forget to sit down. I went back into my journals and I just started reading these old prayers. And I found in May of 2019 this excerpt in my journal written in a moment of hopelessness and not being able to see the way. And it said, I have the perfect home for you. There's a pond there and an epic tree. And my peace will reside there. This has been such an overwhelming thing, but every time I start thinking, how are we going to work this out? How are we going to figure this out? I come and I sit right here in the swing. I don't have to figure out how to work it out. I just have to believe that it's going to be okay. And these dreams that are put in our heart and these things that we feel passionate about, I just have to live my life as if they're important and as if they're blessed and as if it is something that we're supposed to do and keep first things first. You know, the tree and the pond, that's really not up to me to make that kind of thing happen. And I feel like all of the dreams that we have kind of fall in that category. Building this farm and our learning center and our reach and all the teaching we want to do, it's just It's just the very same as this tree and this pond. I don't have to figure out how that stuff is going to happen. I just have to take care of what's right in front of me. I'm getting a cow. Like, this is a lifelong dream. I literally wake up in the night and lay in bed and think about my cow. I've been making the same turkey recipe for several years now, and it's one of those things If it ain't broke, don't fix it.