Dr Ron Stotts Interview

This is episode 281 of the Empowered Team podcast. Welcome to the Empowered Team Podcast where we explore how to optimize your performance in career, sport and life. And now your host, executive coach and life strategist, Kari Schneider.

Welcome.

Welcome to the Empowered Team Podcast. I'm your hostess, Kari Schneider and I'm very, very excited to have a guest On Today. It's Dr. Ron Stotts. And Ron is, is an amazing human with all kinds of accolades. But I want to highlight a couple of professional things before I ask you to explain. You're a three time best selling author. You're, you have a Ph.D. in psychology and you're also a chiropractor. I'm just, I love this, the combination of the mind and the body. This is lighting me up already. And you've, I like this. You've explored the depths of ancient wisdom and the latest psychological neurological studies and leadership as you guide entrepreneurs and executives to the highest level of conscious leadership. Can I just say yes, because that's, I spend hour after hour working on things like this with leaders and I am so excited to learn from you. So tell me, tell us a little more about you and what you do and how you got to doing what you do.

All right. Well, you know, the simple direction is, is that I really just, my, my hidden agenda is I want to create a more conscious and caring world. And I was just in, in the process of writing my first book and my publisher really recognized that I have a very unique talent. You know, you see all the leadership books and they talk about how to take somebody from mid level to, you know, one of the lower echelons of the higher level of leadership. And what they recognized was that I have the ability to take people into the highest levels of leadership. And as I studied and read more about that, it was something I certainly accepted because I saw what it took and it was really a description of what I've been doing for 40 plus years and certainly doing with my own life. And, and what that is, is it's really two things that the highest conscious leaders and the most successful leaders do is that they really live a mindful life. They, you know, it really doesn't, yes, they might meditate, do yoga, tai chi, martial arts or whatever, but they also turn whatever they're doing, you know, if they play a musical instrument, if they play golf, if they are talking with their spouse, they're really doing it in a much more present conscious way that allows that mindfulness to just continue to neurologically rewire their brain for that level of thinking, that level of presence. And the other thing is significant personal transformational experiences are something that are just a part of their life. And that's really comfortable for me because that's always been a part of my life. And so we really look at bringing that not only into my work, but into their life as a regular challenge that's going on so that they are dealing with, they're dealing with that significant personal transformational experience as an opportunity, not as some challenge that has to be overcome. And you know, they see it as just a natural process of their life and their, they're evolving into who they want to be, the level of play that they want to be on.

So yeah, that. Okay, I, I was kind of holding my breath there because I'm like, oh, I want to, I'm making notes, I'm doing all the things. This is so good because you're pointing to some of the things that, you know, there's, there's lots of quippy sayings. One of them is what gets you here won't get you there. There's, you know, we have research around fixed mindset and growth mindset. And so much of what you're describing is, is this ability for us as physiological brains and, and beings to be able to continue to expand, to continue to grow. And when you, you pointed to, in the very beginning, you pointed to your secret agenda. And I'm like, oh yes, this is the, this is it, the secret agenda of a more conscious and loving world. And if that's, if, if leaders are being supported in more conscious and loving selves or more conscious and loving serving, then to me that result is inevitable. A more conscious and loving world. It's the ripple effect.

Yeah, I see it. You know, I mean, thinking of one fellow, he's got five, nine figure national and international businesses and, and he came in pretty, pretty tough character. And, but as he, and you said it, well, as he fell in love with himself, which allows him to be more present and conscious and emotionally intelligent and aware, he really saw, he had a whole new perspective of what he was doing, how he was doing it and what he could, how he could do it differently. And within months he was, you know, restructuring his organizations. And you know, I worked with quite a few of his C suites and bringing everybody up to speed so that he wasn't having to micromanage everything, which is what he was doing before. And all of a sudden he really allowed himself to step back and trust and be supportive of the bringing out the best in Everyone. And you know, in working with some of the sweet C suites, I really saw that how that really enhanced their family life also. Not only their life with the people they were working with, but in their family lives all of a sudden. Their relationship with their partner, their relationship with their kids, you know, it enhances all aspects of their life and it does make a more conscious and caring world. Yeah, it has that, that ripple effect and it's, it's, it does work. I just need to reach. But enough to make that become the norm.

Absolutely. Because it, it may be the norm for some people, but from a worldwide standpoint may not be the norm. And, and I am so pleased that you gave a real life example of, of someone who's an achiever, someone who is a leader in a company. Because in my experience in working with those clients who are in those roles and having been an entrepreneur for many years as well, the, the achiever mindset is keep doing, keep doing, keep doing, keep doing. And as I keep doing, then I'm going to be really busy. And if I'm busy and if I'm doing and if I'm accomplishing, then I must be valuable, I must be important or I must be worthy in some form or another. And it's this, it's this cycle of never ending doing because there's always going to be another level, there's always going to be another thing. But then this person can feel as when, when you described him at first, kind of hard coming in, maybe a little stubborn, maybe a little focused in what. And yet, and yet it's the, it's literally the opening and the softening that has the person be able to reach so much more. And I don't want to make it sound like much more is better. I, I expand in such a, you.

Know, in my first book over Scheduled by Success, it's really that' describing exactly what you're talking about. They're so busy being successful that they don't really take the time that they, every successful person I've ever spoken with, they always have this ideal project or this lifestyle or you know, so they don't really step back to take the time to really shift their level of consciousness and awareness and abilities, access the abilities from within themselves to take themselves up to that level. So they're not just staying busy, that they're actually creating the life that they want to be living. And that, that's a big difference between being successful and, and being, you know, whole and complete and self accepting and feeling like, you know, there's no regrets.

Well, there's, I think we've been sold a little bit of a lie and the, the lie being that, oh, if you've achieved this, then your life will be like this. And it's this perception, perception that it's going to feel amazing. And yet the, the feeling that we're all chasing is some form of love and connection. And when you, when you described, when he learns to love himself, then he is able to show up in a way that supports and serves other people in a way that they can show up and it just exponentially spreads. So this concept of loving oneself to, to many high achievers or many achievers continuing on that doing, doing, doing path, that can sound kind of, sometimes it can sound weak, it can sound slower, it can sound like, well, I'm, I'm serving other people. Why, why do I need it? What does loving myself even mean?

And so I've had people say that.

Yeah. And so can you describe this? Because I know that for me in my own personal journey, it's, it's been phenomenally transformational in my life and my healing. So what, what would you describe as someone, when someone's learning to love themselves?

A couple of things just from what you shared is the first thing everybody recognizes in the work is that their personal development is parallel to their professional development. They really go hand in hand and you know, so they can't discount, you know, taking care of themselves, loving themselves and you know, and the other thing that all of the research shows, but everybody recognizes soon after they go through the process is that the more conscious and a leader is the literally on a big picture. So they're also successful. They're traditionally always making. They're increasing the organization and their personal profits and productivity by at least 40%. I mean, that's just research, I'll be honest with you. And a lot of my clients kind of laugh at that because they've increased their income and organizational value so much more than much more. And all just because it just makes sense. It's like what I'm happy helping them do is, is really become more self. Aw. That allows them, you know, I work a lot on healing in the inner child, taking care of all the things that keep us from loving and accepting ourselves. That's just the initial part of the work and that creates a foundation for them to really develop in the life that they want. You know, so many times there, and I've watched this for decades as people are building their life on a foundation that just is on sand. And it Just isn't strong enough. You know, they get to a certain point and all of a sudden it starts falling. Ap. That's oftentimes when they come to me is they go, geez, it's, you know, I'm trying twice as hard. I'm using all the things that worked before, all of that, you know, sort of cliche attitude. And the truth is they're ready to grow. You know, whenever you're having a challenge, it's nothing, literally nothing but an indicator that a part of you is ready to be healed and grow. And the beauty of that is, is when you really stop for a moment, learn to breathe in and heal those aspects of themselves that are saying, hey, I'm. I'm ready to be healed. So you can evolve. You know, you, you not only evolve, but you access the very part that you need to be able to take your life up to the next level that you're looking towards. And so it's really beautiful to watch. And that of course develops, you know, neurologically. Of course they're redeveloping their mind to that more open, positive mindset. But. But they're also literally accessing levels of thinking and perspectives that allow them to be more creative, to have greater imagination, intuition. You know, the, the highest level that I work with is really, you know, what I'm moving them towards is what I call big mind, where they, yes, they've learned. A lot of times people come in and they're very left brain, logically oriented, and you know, they really kind of pride themselves on being stuck in their head and having shut off their heart and gut and the emotional part of life.

I do, I do this, I'm making the line across, like cutting your head off from your body like nothing else exists. That's living from here on up, you.

Know, so I have to really get them to breathe into and feel what the rest. I mean, there's a lot of. Literally the heart and the, and the gut are really part of the brain. I mean, neurologically they are connected and a lot of the same wiring going on. They can't. You know, the problem is when you cut off those parts, you know, there's the brain stem, then there's the midbrain, and then there's the cortex, the higher level thinking, well, if you're not breathing and you're not in your body and present, you're communicating to your body that you're in a fear state, might not psychologically recognize it as that, but it throws everything off. And the chemical gates between that midbrain and cortex begin to shut down. So you really are diminishing your ability to access your highest levels of thinking. Yeah, go ahead.

Oh, I was just going to say there's a couple points here. One is that I literally on that point have spent time speaking to someone's, speaking to their wants in a way of. Listen, you'll be able to think better and you'll be able to, if you using what they are clamoring after in order to, in order to try and have them open just, just a smidgen sometimes. And, and, and what you were pointing to, I want to reiterate something that I think our listeners will find so important is that, is that we think we're building certain things and we think we're doing it with everything that we're accomplishing or achieving. And yet what's really happening is when we expand or allow ourselves to open from our hearts, we're accessing. And, and that was the thing that I want to highlight is that we're accessing what we have innately already within us. Instead of learning something, figuring something out or, or getting something, or accomplishing something, it's, it's actually, it's actually allowing something to emerge that's always been there. And what I hear and I've experienced myself is something along the lines of, well, I always thought I wanted blank, and I discovered that I always had blank. It's always been there. Or what I have right now is what I've always wanted. I just didn't know it well.

I mean, there's an addiction of people looking outside of themselves for things that can only be found within. And that is really a big part of my training all the way through is really to support them in learning to trust and access. You know, there's that kind of syndrome that we hear going around that I'm not enough. And I think people would be startled, you know, you know, they see people and it looks like they've got the ideal life. Well, those are the people that come in and work with me. So I really see that a lot of them really don't feel on a very deep level that they're enough. And of course, you know, it's easy to say, well, no, you're not enough. But the truth is they're just not accessing enough from within themselves because they don't know how to go within and trust what's available. And that's a huge difference.

Can you share a little bit about. For someone who is listening and they are going, okay, I get what you're saying I do want more of that. I am on the hamster wheel of, you know, there's so many deadlines, there's so much of this, there's so much that I'm trying to do in my life. How do I learn to trust? How do I learn to go within? What would you suggest for somebody that way?

You know, the art of life is, is really, well, let me, let me shift. You know, I'm a sailor, so excuse my voting analogies, but when I'm sailing, you know, on the for sale, there's a. Two little ribbons, two little threads on one on each side. And as I'm, you know, using the wheel or the tiller, those little threads, if I'm up too high into the wind, the inside one will begin to waver. That tells me, oh, just make a minor adjustment and I fall off and everything's moving fine. If I go too low on the wind, the other one wiggles and I come up a little bit. Those telltales, those are indicators. And the beauty of that is if I don't pay attention to those subtle indicators, then the sails start luffing and I'm, you know, lose control of the boat and, you know, worst case scenario, I could get in trouble. So we have to be present enough to recognize the abundance of indicators that are in our life. And, you know, the. On a grosser level, one of the indicators is certainly our emotion. So if we're not emotionally intelligent as a leader, we're missing, you know, all the indicators that are telling us ahead of time what's what we need to be doing or what we need to look at, what we need to breathe into, what we need to, to pay attention to and deal with, but on similar levels, you know, so. So the art of it really becomes, okay, what's the subtlest telltale that I can have in my life so that I can really correct as early as possible in relationship to anything going on. And that subtlest indicator, of course, is your breathing. Because your breathing is going to shift. If you're feeling consciously or unconsciously any level of stress, any level of discomfort, anything coming into your life that feels challenging or problematic, you're going to, you're going to stop breathing, you're going to shift your breathing, you're going to go breathe more shallowly. So, you know, fortunately, breathing to me is, is the gateway to higher consciousness and to being more aware. And so you really can start to become aware of your breath to the point where initially you have to kind of like a Stop process that we created in the brain integration center back in the 70s, that, you know, when something comes up, you. You stop for a moment, you take a few gentle breaths, and then you observe what am I feeling, what's going on in the circumstances, what, you know, not, not what I'm reacting to, but what is really going on. And as you're observing, you begin to see what your next best, best step is. And then you proceed on that step, you know, stop, stop, take a few breaths, observe and proceed. And you know, it's really as structured as that sounds. That's the beginning of practice, of a mindfulness practice, because after a while you're just automatically breathing, you're automatically observing, and from a curious and conscious place, you're present and you're always seeing what your next best step is and trusting that and moving forward in that. And over time, that becomes your way of life. You know, I don't even watch my breathing anymore. Breathing just shifts in relationship to what's most appropriate or supportive for me to move into and through whatever is coming into my life. And, and you begin to see that as, oh, it's always perfect if I'm open to it, if I receive it. And as I open to it and move through it and grow, my life continues on the trajectory towards my highest intention, what I'm breathing into, what I aspire to.

That, that description of that process is beautiful to me because you're pointing to not resisting, not avoiding. You're pointing to becoming aware, observing, moving through, and it just being a fluid process. Something that as natural as breathing is, as natural as just living is. And, and that I think, you know, if I'm going to be thinking about it or pondering about it, I, I think that that's, that's what we have always been meant for. And it's, it's this, it's the. You know, you, you pointed to something earlier. This, the challenge. And I wanted to. I wanted to. It's the, it's not that the ch. I can't find where it was. I jotted something down, but it's not that the challenge is, is an obstacle. The challenge is there for the expansion. I'm. I'm putting my own words to it, but that's fine.

Yeah, I mean, you know, kind of New Agey, but the universe turns out to be quite perfect if we learn to trust it because, you know, anybody can look at their life and most of us can recognize that some of the toughest times really turned out to be the best times. You Know, I was in the Marine Corps. I got out on a medical discharge. But, you know, I thought that was the toughest year of my life. I mean, it really. It affected my entire life. Well, with hindsight, I look back and it's like, well, yeah, it definitely affected my entire life. It took me into a trajectory. Tr. Whatever that word, trajectory that I would have never gone on. I would have never, you know, I would have been the all American boy and gone to work and d. And never even taken a look inside for lack of need or. And so, you know, to me, it's. It's like the lobster. A lobster once a year, they begin to feel a niggle or discomfort, and so they know to go into their den and it's time to shed their old shell. And they wiggle and move and shed that old shell, and it's a. You know, it's incredibly vulnerable time for them. But they also know that if they don't shed that old and grow a new shell, that they'll die. And that's literally, you know, we have to set up our lives so that it supports that evolution. We can't get stuck in a mindset, a comfort zone. You know, a comfort zone to me is like, it's a level of consciousness. It's a range of consciousness. In other words, people. It's like, oh, I'm feeling really good today. Oh, I'm feeling really bad. Well, that's the level of consciousness. Somebody else might. Their. Their good might be their bad, or somebody else wouldn't even want to be playing in that realm because it looks so, you know, emotionally draining and dramatic and traumatic and that type of thing. So. Well, you have to choose your level of consciousness because that's Determines how you perceive, experience, and react to everything that comes into your life.

Yeah. And. And it can be. It can be more of a diffuse awareness. It can be more of a focused awareness. It can expand, it can contract. It doesn't have to be one way. I. I recall very recently noticing that someone was kind of not in tune, and. And I ended up saying something like, are you. It seems like you're checking out. Instead of checking in with. With yourself or others, it seems like you're just checking out a bit instead of checking in. And I think that that's. That's our human coping mechanism for things that we were never taught as children. And ultimately, if our parents didn't teach us, it's. It becomes not their responsibility, but our own to discover what we needed to learn. Perhaps that wasn't taught and, and what I'm finding so much is that that is to feel that most of us simply have been, not, have not been taught to feel in a way that is, is not productive but rather healthy for ourselves, healthy for our process, healthy for our growth. Just to be able to feel something that act in and of itself. We've been, I think, taught to resist, avoid, react, and we've got plenty of opportunities. We could go on and on about what's available for us that way. However, does I humanity potentially a disservice? We're feelers, we're not, we're not just thinkers.

You can't be an authentic, whole self accepting, loving being if you're not accepting those parts of yourself that you, you know, as you're, as a child growing up, you know, emotional issues come up. There's dramas, there's traumas, there's difficulties. Some of them seem minor to an adult maybe, but to a child they might be significant. And so if you're not comfortable, say it's you look at your family. Well, let me just side note, I've asked this question literally all over the world. What does a child want more than anything else? And the answer is their parents.

Love.

Yeah. And they want unconditional love from their parents. And so they'll do whatever it takes to get that. And so if the parents kind of move away from them energetically, you know, and that tells them, oh, that part. It's not safe for me to be angry, it's not safe for me to be afraid. It's not safe for me to, you know, feel whatever emotion that I'm dealing with. And so they begin to really, you know, as one of my mentors, Joseph Campbell said, you know, we've got this cave within and we just shove all of those disparate parts that we don't feel were acceptable. We all those feelings that we didn't know how to deal with because nobody helped us or we didn't, you know, weren't mature enough to know. And we close into that cave.

Yeah. And, and it's interesting you say that because then we get as adults, we're into our, you know, 30s, 40s, 50s, 60s, 60s, 70s, and we're dealing with the child's needs because they were never. The child within us was never given what that child actually needed. And as a real life example of this, I had, I was working with someone who, not long ago, who's in a, a company owner but in an operational, was acting in an operational role. And some issues were coming up with some of the staff. And the complaint was that this person in their role would. Would. Could not deal with disciplining any of the staff. And it was becoming a problem. And so the question became, well, what. What are you afraid of? And it came. It came out so quickly. The response came out so quickly was being yelled at and that they won't like me, right?

And I see it all the time.

And it was just like, okay. And then it was, why? Well, and. And we explored a little bit peeled a little bit back. And it was ultimately what their. What they needed and they wanted, what their whole child was begging for was to feel safe, accepted, and loved. And that. That example, I thought about it afterwards, I was just like, this. This is all of us. And when we're not having those basic, basic fundamental emotional needs met as children, then we are wandering around as adults searching for that in ways that are not. We're looking for it from everyone else, from our partners, from our children, from our businesses, from our accomplishments.

And.

And they're never found there. They're literally found within ourselves. And that's where we don't know, how do I get that from me. And I'm sharing this personally in that all those little subtle nudges, all of those little signs. I had years of them, years of them, until finally it was a matter of, you know, gets knocked right down with an autoimmune disorder disease, and you can't do anything. And. And yet I was blind. We refused to see any of the things that were along the. Along the way. And ultimately, one of the biggest healing. I mean, among all of the things that I'm doing naturally, one of the biggest healing things for me, some of the people in the audience know that I'm speaking of graves disease, but one of the biggest healing things fundamentally, profoundly, has been literally telling myself, you're safe, I love you. You're safe. I love you. Everything's okay. I got you. I got you. And it's so simple and it's so vulnerable. I could. I could literally tear up just saying it. It sounds. To some many people, it would just sound so corny. And it has been fundamentally the journey of healing just that simple, simple part.

And we see it. I mean, I. I see it all the time in. In leadership where they're really leading from their ego. They're leading with all of their damage, and it's just being spun throughout the organization. And then they look at, well, how do I get more out of my people? Or how do you. How do we communicate better and it has to start with them and you know, with what you're talking about, why I really resort, if I can use that word, to really when somebody comes to me, what I'm looking for is what is that deepest thing. And it's always similar. If I'm in my power, I'll not be accepted, I'll die. And if I love myself, I won't be accepted and people will abandon me and I'll die. And you know, so there's deep core beliefs that are running them on a subconscious level. And so for me to really make the transformation, they have to really go in and reparent that little child. They have to go in and, and literally help that child into and through all the emotional backlog. And it really, it takes a couple of months and then they've got enough of a foundation that when something comes up, they know how to deal with it in a supportive way and it's not a big deal. But in, you know, within two months, all of a sudden that they've got a connection. They're looking, instead of looking for love and acceptance outside, they're looking within. They're really paying attention to their breathing, to that inner child. And all of a sudden they become more emotionally aware and that self awareness. Of course then our relationship with ourselves is always mirrored in our relationships with others. And so it gets mirrored in their relationships with, with the other people in their organization. All of a sudden they become more emotionally sensitive to their needs, more sensitive to paying attention to creating that safe, supportive environment that you talk about. And that gets everybody, you know, as I was talking about those telltales, those indicators when you get your life once you recognize, and it's a key part of the initial part of my work is to get them to recognize what their highest intention is, what's their greatest aspiration that they need or want to breathe into. And that should be uncomfortable, it should be a stretch, you know, but as they, as they do that, their life just becomes simpler and more easily maintained. But as you get your whole organization in alignment too to what everybody, you know, is focused on what, what the organization is really all about, the underlying, you know, sense of it, the mission statement, but not on just a title on the website. But you know, what we're really about. You get everybody on the same page. Everybody is creating and contributing and feeling part of something. And so they give their all and all of a sudden you have an organization that's increasing their productivity and profits and the ease of running that organization are so, you know, it's so much easier to do it that these people find they have more time and there's less effort and stress. And so I. I see no argument that makes any sense to stick to that old pattern. But. But you're right. People are scared to death to open those cave doors. And. And yet once they do, it really turns into pretty much an adventure for them. I mean, my clients, you know, it's like, yeah, it's scary at first, but once they do, then that curiosity, because they're. They're smart people, and they go, oh, I see that connection. I see that. And they just start, you know, they're on fire, really, you know, and excited about the process of healing and accessing all those parts of themselves that they didn't feel like they could get.

And to your. To your point on this. This. What they're experiencing in their lives, what they actually have happen for themselves is that it's. It's not just about their business or their leaders or their. Their productivity. It ends up becoming about their own fulfillment in their own life. It becomes about the relationships with their spouses or their children or the. Their friends. And everything deepens. Everything is. Is so much more connected and profound. And that's where, again, it's like. It's like the motion that I made earlier of cutting the head off. It's the same kind of compartmentalization that's happening with everyone else, everything else, as though it's not just all part of one life. You know, it's like, oh, this is my work and this is my family, and this is my spouse, and this is my health. And they're all in these different buckets and. And they're also very compartmentalized and separate. And we're trying to do the same thing that we're doing with how we think. And it's. It's just. It's like. I call it fighting reality. You know, you can. You can keep trying to act as though you. As though how you are showing up in this area isn't going to affect all those other areas. It. It just does. It will. We. We can't help that overlap or bleed or whatever you want to call it, into everything else that exists in our world.

And that unification makes life so much easier, so much more fun.

It is. It is alignment.

It is.

It's just basically, you know, like to think of getting ducks in a row or alignment or. It's that. That flow or that ease where everything makes sense instead of. Instead of trying so hard to separate or trying so hard to have one thing exist a certain way and another thing exists a certain way because that's what we, we were taught or that's what the world is telling us. I, I, there's this, this last part that I can't help but bring up because I'm curious about how you perceive this with all your experience and how many people you've helped and, and how you show up in the world. What is your perception of artificial intelligence in? Because it's coming in fast and hard for many, many leaders and companies, and it's been termed very disruptive. What are your thoughts on, on conscious leadership and conscious humanity and artificial intelligence?

I think it's all good. It all depends on what we do with it. It all depends on us, just like everything else. You know, it's all if we're in a good state of consciousness and we're paying attention and we're present and we're, and we're a conscious leader who's really caring about others and which really can be, you know, said. Well, if I care about the bottom line, well, the bottom line is caring about others also. And so I think AI is only just going to become a support tool. I mean, I certainly use it, and it doesn't dictate what I end up writing or doing, but it's a helpful tool and triggers thinking, it triggers ideas, you know, so a lot of that is, is just going to be determined, you know, you know, it's like Facebook. Is that a good thing or a bad thing? Well, it depends on how we use it.

Yeah, yeah, there's, there's parables about these things. I love, I love how easily that answer came for you. It's, it's just like, it's, it's, it really depends on us. And, and considering that AI is learning from us and then teaching itself, then there, there's, the answer is if we're teaching it love, we're teaching it kindness, we're teaching it, then that can be replicated in a way that's beyond our comprehension. And so AI doesn't have to be any different than anything else in how.

We, it becomes an enemy. And it's just the dark part of ourselves that it's, it's accepted, you know, so it's really, yeah, bring your best to it. It'll be, you know, one of your best tools, but your worst to it, and it'll, it'll degrade the universe.

And, and on that point, it's, it's, that is the wholeness, would you say is, is that it's not, it's not about only being, not about only being one thing. It's not about only. We all have a shadow side. We all have a side that is the antithesis to whatever. And it's, it's being able to embrace all of that that really has us be able to see and be aware without, without making something wrong, without fighting and battling, without, you know, trying to divide ourselves and, and that kind of thing. Would you, would you expand on, on that or agree or dis?

Well, I certainly agree because it's, it's like Joseph Campbell said, you know, we have to enter the cave within to discover that treasure that we seek. I'm sure I've modified what he said, but anyway, you know, the truth of it is, is that treasure within that we're seeking is that unconditional self acceptance and love that we've wanted all of our lives. You know, I, I have, you know, 50, 40, 50, 60 year olds coming in here all the time who, when they really get down to it, they still want that. And the great thing is, is, well, good, now you can, now you can have it. Because all you have to do is learn to heal and accept and unconditionally integrate all aspects of yourself. And that's how you become whole. That's how you become an authentic person. That's how you become a higher level, you know, leader. And the beauty of that is, is you're, you are smarter, you are more, you know, you're, you're much more agile, you're much more capable of handling it. You're like a surfer on a big wave. You're not going, oh my God, what do I do next? You're, because you're in that flow, you're.

Not afraid of any, you're not afraid of the dark, you know, afraid of the dark anymore.

Anymore.

Right. Yeah, it's, it's, it's, that's. And, and that I imagine especially not avoiding or being afraid or that is part of what allows our brain to open up new neural connections and create greater neuroplasticity and our ability to learn and expand when we don't. We're not putting these limiters on ourselves because we don't want to look or we've been conditioned just to try and be a certain way.

And I would emphasize for your audience, it's not that we don't want to be afraid. We just want to recognize that when we do feel a fear, that that's just an indicator that's serving us to look deeper, to heal. And access more of who we are. So fear is really nothing but that little indicator that helps us guide through life. And that's true for all of our emotions. You know, if you don't have, if you're not emotionally intelligent, you really have just limited your ability to, well, to enjoy your life, but also to be any sort of high level leader and capable of running an organization because you have to just have that agility. I mean, I just touched on it before, but it's the highest. You know, there was a research BY I think IBM of 1500 of the top CEOs in the world. And I think it was like 70% of them acknowledged that they just didn't feel capable of doing their job. I wasn't surprised that that was the, but that they would acknowledge that. But within that study There was about 7% who were just going, having a ball. I mean they were just having a great time and a lot of success and that all, and all of those, that 7% were really had developed that mindset of, of being present and mindful, that mindset of personal development and continued growth evolving and, and they were having fun with life. Yeah, they weren't trying to control it. They were going with the flow. And really recognizing how to, you know, peak performance isn't about, you know, building your energy and you know, it's about being absolutely present and, and trusting and really being grateful for whatever's coming into your life and trusting that and, and healing it and growing with it so you can become who you are meant to be. You know, it's just that I love.

This and I love the, I love the, the ulterior motive you have in, in creating the, the loving and conscious world because, and doing it through leadership. It completely lights me up. Are there any last thoughts of what you would want to share as best piece of advice that you've received or you'd like to impart to others or you wished you heard when you were in your teens or twenties. Is there anything you'd like to share as a message to our listeners?

That's a good question. I think. You know, the simplest share that I can give you is begin to watch your breathing. When are you breathing full and deep? When do you breathe more shallowly? When do you find yourself not breathing at all, even for an extended period? And recognize that that is your, that is your primal indicator. Because when you're not breathing, you're disconnected from yourself and others. So you're accessing, you're not accessing the best of who you are. You're accessing very limited aspect of who you are. It's coming from the amygdala, the fight or flight response. And so you really, you want to start paying attention to your breathing and you want to pay attention to it to the point where, you know, just doing that simple stop process where you, oh, I'm not breathing. Good. Well, I'll take a few breaths, I'll become curious, I'll become present, I'll see what my best option is and then I'll feel more comfortable proceeding, you know, because it's, it's fear that keeps us held down. It's fear that keeps us from playing the level we want to play on. But the fear is not the bad thing. It's your response to it, it's your perception of it. You know, I find that if you can't find an answer, all you need to do is breathe and move into a higher state of consciousness to where that answer that question and answer available. But it's, you can always look within, you can always trust and, and the, you know, everybody trusts the trying and efforting. Well, I would ask them to trust the silence.

Yes.

Breathe into the silence and see the ability to create and, and really come up with their highest level thinking from that inner silence that's there.

And trust, trust their own patience, trust their own ability. So beautiful. There's one thing I want to, I want to leave with, with something that you had said earlier, and it's that one of the best pieces of advice that you'd been given is to quiet your mind and open your heart.

Indeed.

There we go. Well, with that, I am so grateful for the work that you've done with creating more conscious leaders and very, very thankful that you've been able to come on and share some of your wisdom with us. So thank you so much. And for our listeners, they can find you on LinkedIn. We've got, you've got Facebook @Ronstotts50. You've got personal LinkedIn @Doctor Ronstotts. And you are on YouTube as well, Dr. Ronstotts. And we will post this video on YouTube as well and make sure that you, your audience and our audience get to, get to share and find you.

So, and they're always welcome to call me, a discovery call and just, you know, explore where they are, what they need. And that's not, that's not a sales call. It's a really, let's, let's help people as much as we can.

Excellent. Excellent. I encourage everyone to, we'll have a link in the show notes. So we'll put this link in the show notes and check that out so that you can have that discovery link. That would be amazing. Okay. Reach out to Dr. Ron Staats and thank you so much.

Well, I enjoyed it and thank you everybody.

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