EP17 Bailey Bram - Hockey - Olympian

This is the Empowered athlete podcast, episode 17. Making the Cut, making the grade, making the team. What is it like to put yourself out there and go for a spot on one of the best teams in the world? Well, our guest today on the Empowered Athlete podcast, Bailey Bram, has done just that. Her team, it's the women's Canadian Hockey team of Canada, one of the best teams ever. And the process to get there is absolute hell. You have to hear her story. So inspirational, so motivating. We are so pumped to have Olympic medalist Bailey Bram with us today. The calendar reads 2019. It is 2019, which means the 1230 challenge has begun.

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Let me take you back to the summer of 2008. It was my first summer not playing for the national team. I had it off. And I got to train the entire summer with Kari on a specifically made program that was tailored to me, my injuries, my body and my goals for that next upcoming season. And I was 34 years old. Well, the result went back over to Turkey and won a European cup in incredible physical condition. Thank you to that program setting me up for the perfect season. Well, now you have access to the exact same thing. Hit email ksowowerconditioning.com that's KS for Kari Schneider. And get started on one of Kari's incredible online training programs. The program is tailored to you. It has video of each exercise you're doing so you know what you're doing. Your reps are laid out, the sets are laid out. You can't go wrong. Reach out now to reach your best.

Welcome to the Empowered Athlete Podcast, created to support athletes in their pursuit of excellence and inspire others toward their best lives. Hosted by Kari Schneider, coach to top performers in sport and life, and Paul Durden, former national and professional volleyball player.

Hello, everyone, and welcome to Another edition of the podcast. We're excited to have Bailey Bram joining us, hockey player extraordinaire from St. Anne, Manitoba. Sorry, everyone. She's newly engaged and planning a wedding for next summer. But, Bailey, thank you so much for making the time, and we're excited to talk with you today.

You are so welcome. Look at that introduction.

Don't you feel special now?

I do.

That's right, because you are. You're special. You're special to us. We haven't talked to you in so long. We're so happy to chat with you.

I'm super excited.

Awesome.

Awesome.

So, Bailey, your background is pretty extensive. I mean, you're someone who started off with some really big accolades between being on the U18 team and winning a silver at World championships back in 2008 and then getting a gold in 2012, and then heading on to being centralized with the hopes of making the Olympics squad in 2014. And for many people, you know, we'll go into that story perhaps, but there was potential for that maybe to be the end of your career, and you stuck with it and plowed through and. And ultimately became a silver medalist at the Pyeongchang Olympics. So we want to hear more about what brought you to that point and where you are right now. And so what started hockey for you. You're a Manitoba girl. So was it just kind of a natural thing in your family or what brought this about?

You know, it was. A lot of people don't know this, but I have a huge family, so I have five brothers and two sisters. Four of my brothers are older than me, and everybody played hockey. And so dad every year would build a rank in our. In this. In our backyard. And they eventually had to basically force us off the rink because, you know, there's so many of us. We'd always had these big hockey games going on, and none of us could feel our hands or our toes. And we'd all be frostbite. Yeah. But we'd get called in every night. And then it was our feet and toes would dethaw. And we'd all cry like little babies. Oh, it hurts. It hurts so bad. It hurt.

And you know what?

A lot of people don't, especially in southern Ontario or warmer places in Canada. They don't know what that feels like. Like, it's so bad when your toes thaw out. It hurts so much.

It was honestly the worst. And then, like, we'd be so cold. So eventually mom would be like, hey, go have a hot bath. And like, it was still like, you'd have, like, the pins and needles in the towel. It hurts. Yeah, we were just babies. But, yeah, I always think back to that and I'm like, so many awesome memories on the outdoor rink. But then the cooling off period was just awful, you know, Is it not.

The class Canadian image, though? You know, kids out on the rink until they're frozen at night? It's.

It's.

It's Canadian at its best. It's exactly what everyone's about.

Seriously.

I feel like so few people can relate to that anymore because, you know, you just don't hear about that anymore. That there's a family of. What did you say? Eight kids, Seven kids.

Eight kids.

Eight kids. And. And the rink outside and that kind of thing. Like, I had a. I had a buddy growing up with. And their family always put a rink but on the lake because their. Their house is on a lake. And, you know, it just. I don't know, maybe it's because we live in southern Ontario now, but, you know, you just. It seems like something that's maybe a time gone by. But that's so cool. What a cool childhood that must have been.

It really was. And, you know, it was. Everyone always says, oh, you have eight kids in your family. Like, was there always big fights? Or, like, you get along with your siblings? And, you know, obviously we fought. We were siblings, but, you know, they're. I look back now and I wouldn't change anything. I think my siblings are literally my best friends and the whole world. And, you know, having them grow up, I think kind of has shaped who I am. And, you know, I think every one of them brings a different aspect to the family and made me who I am. So it's been pretty special to grow up with so many siblings. And, yeah, seeing.

Seeing you and Shelby together and seeing some of the photos of your family as a whole, I believe that it Completely. Completely.

Yeah, it's been awesome. And my sister actually. So she lives in Russia for the year. A lot of people wouldn't know that, but my sister's husband plays in the khl, so she's in Russia. And last week she actually flew home and surprised the whole family, so. Surprised everyone, which was pretty cool. So she's.

I might have seen a little video online, so that's awesome.

Yeah, so that's been awesome. She thinks she goes back in a couple days, but it's been nice to have her home.

Oh, that's super cool.

And where is everybody else? Are they all over the place, too?

Not really. Like, I think everyone else is In Manitoba besides Shelbs, so you can have.

Some solid family get togethers and that kind of thing.

Yeah, absolutely. So.

Ah, that's great. So you started that way and then was there. There must have been some girls hockey at that stage. Were you on a. We on a boys team?

I was. I was on a boys team, so in our little town. So there's only about 1500 people that live in our town and we usually only had enough players to make like one team for age group. And so that was what I did. I played with the boys. But Jocelyn the Rock is actually from my hometown and she was two years older than me and she always played with my older brothers. And there was another girl, Melanie Gongyo, who's actually Jocelyn's cousin, and she actually was the one that paved the way for Jocelyn and I. She was like on the under 22 team and she played division one and stuff all before we did. And so Jocelyn always says she looked up to Mel growing up her whole life, and she wanted to be like Mel. But for me, it was. It was literally Joss, like, Joss was like my hero. I wanted to be like Joss one day. And I remember she'd be on the team with my brothers and I would be her little water girl. I'd bring her stick to the bench and give her high fives after she got off the ice because I was like, oh, it's so cool. She plays with the boys and there's hitting and, you know, so she kind of paved the way for me. And I think also my family, they never made it weird for me. I had so many brothers that playing with the guys was normal. And all my teammates were always super accepting and I never really had to change in a different room or anything. So there wasn't really. I never really felt like I was secluded from the team or anything. And some of those guys that I played with are still some of my really good friends now.

Well, when they know you've got that many older brothers, nobody's gonna mess around.

And, you know.

Exactly.

There's always respect. There's always.

You've got the security detail whenever you need it.

Exactly.

Yeah, absolutely.

That's perfect.

And did you ever.

What was it like for you when you actually got to play on the same team as Joslyn?

You know what? It was pretty cool. So I never did growing up because we were always a couple years apart. So we played together in summer hockey, certain tournaments here and there, and we never overlapped with Team Manitoba or anything. And then when I first got invited to the under 18 tryouts. I remember, I mean, obviously after my parents, I think Jocelyn was the first person I called and I was like, joss, like, this is real. Like this is happening. I remember I was just bawling my eyes out on the phone and I was so excited. And, you know, ever since then, it's every time, you know, one of us gets invited to a camp or made a team, we'd always kind of check in. How are you doing? Did you make it? And, you know, we're each other's biggest.

She's got a Harding and she's got a heart of gold. She's so great.

Yeah, she's, she's pretty awesome.

So that's, that's amazing. So what, what, what was the step that you got to that, like, was it only hockey that you were involved in? Were there other sports? And, and how, how did that transition to get you to the point of being able to go play at university?

No, you know what? It was, it wasn't always hockey. I get it obviously was my number one sport. But mom and dad were pretty good about making all of us do other sports. So we were usually allowed one, maybe two spring hockey tournaments or summer hockey tournaments. And then the rest was, you played soccer, you played baseball, or you did something. And then with school sports, it was like, you know, we did every single school sport there possibly was. And so they always encouraged us and they'd come, you know, they'd come watch us play badminton or watch us play basketball. And, you know, they supported us with every other sport the same way with hockey. So pretty grateful for that.

Now I kind of think that summer is in Manitoba, that you have to play a summer sport because you have to appreciate that short little summer season and be able, you know, otherwise, if you're, if you play spring hockey and play hockey throughout the summer, like, you've seriously missed any time outside with warmth, you know.

Exactly. And I think for them also, I mean, now it's a huge thing like developing the all around athlete. But I don't think for them at the time, I don't think that's what they were really thinking. I think it was more get away from hockey so that once, you know, winter came back around, we were excited to play again. And that was what they always told us, like, you'll appreciate it more. And all my friends would play all summer and I was always kind of jealous. I wanted to. And they're like, no, trust us, like, you'll, you'll appreciate it a Lot more come winter time. And, you know, I think they definitely were spot on with that. So.

Yeah, that's, that's huge. That recognition they had that I don't, I wouldn't want to speak for what aspirations they might have had for you in hockey, but to just recognize that if you do too much of it, you may start to hate it. And just to give you some balance and perspective and give you a breather from hockey. Absolutely. You're going to come back charged, ready to play again and itching to go. And that's. We, we've talked about it before, you know, on the show that, that just gets missed these days with people being too focused too soon, parents too intense and kids just burn out. It's. It's a recipe for.

No, absolutely. Like, I, yeah, I know. Like, I have parents come up and, you know, and I had my own hockey camp and stuff this year, but there's a lot of girls, our parents that'll come and they'll say, you know, what does my daughter have to do? She's in this camp, in this camp, in this camp, and she skates. She skates four times, four times a day. Sometimes in the summer. Like, she played two games, has two practices plus a strength session. I'm like, how? And they're nine years old. Yeah.

I'm like, oh, it's like, no, it's.

Like, no, go to the lake. Go to the lake, please, and we'll see you in a couple months.

So, like, it's kind of backwards right now, but it's pretty crazy.

We hear consistently that any of the top athletes that we've interviewed, or obviously between Paul's career and my career, we've been exposed to a lot of different people and athletes and consistently it's these people who have succeeded and done so well. Describe exactly what you did in that. We played every sport we could. We were doing this in the off season and this in high school and that and, you know, experiencing all these different movement patterns. So I look at it from that physical standpoint and you experience all these different things and it makes you a more well rounded and resilient and coordinated athlete for your sport down the road. Little do you know it at the time, but it serves you in the long run.

Exactly. I'm pretty thankful for that.

So your time in Winnipeg, you progressed along with the boys teams and is that like, where was that point where you realized that, hey, I can maybe go to school or, hey, I might maybe able to do something further than what I'm currently Doing, you know, it.

Was kind of interesting because growing up in such a small town, we really only were exposed to all the surrounding towns around us. So those are the guys that I played against. And I mean, you come familiar with your opponents and here and there you played against another girl, but not very often. So I didn't really know much about women's hockey. I didn't really know much about Team Manitoba or anything like that. And I mean, for me, I was going to play in the NHL one day. I was going to be the first girl to play in the NHL. That's right. That was until I was probably 12, I think. And I watched the Olympics on the 2002 Olympics on TV and I was like, oh, there's women's hockey in the Olympics? I didn't know that.

Yeah.

But I just kind of played against the boys, so I didn't really know. And then I remember when I was around 14 or so, there was some of the scouts from Team Manitoba and they had spoken with the national team and they were like, well, you have to transition to the woman's game or else you're never going to make it anywhere. And I remember I was like, no, I don't want to. I don't want to play girls. Like, I don't. That's not like, no. And I remember like crying to my parents, like, I want to play boys. And I remember it was one of the best things I've ever done. I think I got the opportunity to go to Balmoral hall in Winnipeg, which was a prep school that they started my grade 11 year. And so it was basically at the time all the best players that were in grade 11 and 12 all moved and we all lived in dorms and we all went to this school. And I remember I was just like, this is so cool to be a part of a team with all these, you know, like, minded players that have all basically grown up playing boys hockey and now we're all placed together on one team. And I think we, we maybe lost one or two games in two years.

Yeah.

And. Yeah, and almost all of us ended up like it was. We were basically Team Manitoba and a high school team. And then I think almost everyone went and played Division 1 hockey. But even that it was. I didn't really have any clue what to expect. Expect. I remember like getting letters in the mail from universities and I didn't know a thing about any of them. I was going through, like, we didn't really have Internet and whatnot. There was no Instagram, no Twitter. No checking stats or anything. So I remember I had like a checklist in this, like, spreadsheet of like, how many students went to the school, what their record was this year before, what their coach was like. And that was how I kind of narrowed down my decision and definitely not like it is today.

And you ended up at Mercyhurst University, right?

I did, yes.

And how, how was that? Because you, you know, you'd already, I guess you'd experience that living away from home, being in Winnipeg, but it wasn't really like. I'm sure you had pretty close contact with your family, being not so far away, right?

Absolutely.

But then how was that trans transition going to all the way down to the States? Mercyhurst is Pennsylvania.

Yeah. It's about a two hour drive from Toronto, so it's pretty far. You know what? I lived in the dorms, obviously, in Winnipeg, and if we weren't playing, I literally went home every single weekend. Like, I did not stay a weekend in the dorms. Like, I know.

Yeah.

And so it was basically like I was still at home. And when I went to, when I committed to university, I remember, well, mom wanted me to go Ivy League so bad. Like, I don't think when I committed to Merciers, I don't think she talked to me for a week. She was like, what do you mean you're turning down Harvard? Like, yeah, yeah.

For listeners who don't know, there's a ton of Ivy League schools that have really strong women's hockey programs, so an excellent ticket to the Ivy League is with a stick in your hand.

Yeah. She was just like, cornell, Harvard, like, what do you mean exactly? You're not gonna go visit? And she was just like, appalled. And she's like, merciers, where is this? What is this place? Like, I've never even heard of it. And I remember, like, so on July 1, they were allowed to contact us. And I had so many different schools calling me, and I didn't really know who was good, who wasn't good, but the Mercyhurst coach, I remember, he was just so personable and it was like so easy to talk to. And like, everything he said made me want to learn more about the school. And so when I went down to visit, it just really felt like home. And then, not to mention they were, they had such a strong program and Megan Augusta was there, Vicki Bendis was there, and everyone kind of welcomed me and they had all these national team players on their team. So I was like, well, it's a small school, about 2,400 people and felt like.

Felt like St.

Edge.

That's what kind of drew me there. It was small and they had a strong program and, you know, they had a business program. So I was like, well, I'm gonna try it. And it was some of the best four years of my life.

So that's awesome. And then also the. You guys won the Frozen Four.

We did not. We were runners.

Oh, you did?

We were runner up.

Oh, I'm so sorry I rubbed that in your face.

No, that's okay. I think we were ranked number one like, almost all year, and we lost in the semis.

Oh, man, that's heartbreaking.

It was. But, you know, the experiences we went through were pretty cool, and I wouldn't trade it for anything, so.

So throughout your time at university, you're also staying in touch with the national program?

Yes. So my grade 12 year was my first year in the national team kind of program. We had world championships with the under 18. And so I was in grade 12 when that happened. And I remember thinking, okay, the under 22 program, maybe I'll make the team in a couple years. But that was my goal. And then obviously, eventually work on to the senior team and make the Olympic team. And I remember going to tryouts and I trained so hard and I was so excited to be there, and everything just kind of fell into place. Like, I remember getting all these lucky bounces and, you know, everything was just kind of worked at my tryout camp. And I ended up making the team as an 18 year old, which I never expected. And so right before going to university, they have the August summer series against usa And I remember making the team and I, like, cried my eyes out again, obviously, and was just so excited. And I didn't play much, but, you know, to make it as an 18 year old was pretty cool. And then after that, I think every year for the next four years, I was a member of the under 22 team. And so we'd have a tournament at Christmas in either Germany or Austria, and then we'd have the summer series in August.

So that.

That must have been amazing.

It was. And you kind of go up through the program with all the girls that you play with the under 18 program with, and they become your really good friends. And so it became like, you know, it was so much fun to go to camps and you're not only, you know, representing your country with, which is one of the best feelings in the world in itself, but you're doing it with your friends and all these people that, you know, you Learn to love as, you know, basically sisters.

So, yeah.

And so, Skip, I was gonna say, can you. That experience is incredible. Now skip ahead to your making the dream, getting that senior debut. That was 2012, right?

It was. So, yeah.

So how. What was. What was getting the call? Like, you're getting the word. And what did you scream into the phone to Jocelyn at that point?

So that's kind of funny because my freshman year of university, I got invited to the camp. My second year, so my sophomore year, I got invited. My third year, I got invited. And all three years I went. And I was like, pretty confident, like, I'm going to make the team. I'm going to have a good camp. And every single year it was like, no, you're not good enough. You're not strong enough. Sometimes I just got like a letter handed to me, like, okay, like, no, you need to work on abcd, efg. The list was pretty long. And I remember I was just like, my confidence just started to kind of. Kind of go downhill. And I thought, maybe it's not for me to make the Olympic or make the senior team. And my third year, I remember I went and I think I led the whole camp in points or was up there, top three. And I was like, hey, this is my year. I'm going to make the team. And again, I got cut. And so I was pretty frustrated. And my senior year, the camp wasn't until April and our season ended mid March. And so everyone else is 21 years old. They're all partying, enjoying college life, all my teammates, all my roommates. And I remember I was like, is this what I want? Like, am I just going to train really hard and kind of not experience my college days for something that, you know is not attainable? And so I remember calling my mom and I'm like, mom, I don't think I'm gonna go to camp. I got invited, but I'm gonna turn it down. It's like a month after our season's over, and I don't wanna. I don't wanna keep training for it, like, just to get cut. And she. She talked me out of it. And she said, you know What? You're. You're 21 years old. Just go, give it all you got. Have fun. But at that point, I was like, I had applied to schools, I was gonna go do my masters, and that was it with hockey. And so I ended up going to camp. Well, because, dad, Dad, I hung up the phone with mom and I told, don't tell Dad. I said, don't tell dad I'm not going. And like five minutes later, I get a call from my dad, what do you mean you're not going to camp? He's like, oh, goodness. So they convinced me I ended up going and like my first under 22 camp, things just kind of fell into place. And the role that they gave me, I executed it the best that I possibly could. And I remember being pretty nervous when we found we were going to make it or not. They do a little system where you're in a hotel and they start, start the cuts at like 4 in the morning and someone will come up one stairs and they'll knock on your door and you'll go down the other stairs into your meeting room so that no one sees you. So if you get cut, you go directly to the bus. And if you make the team, you go back to your room, but you don't know who made it because you don't see anyone. And yeah, my roommate was Shannon Zabados, and I was like, I didn't sleep all night. So she didn't sleep all night, which she was not very happy about. She was like on the team for probably five or six years by that point. So she knew she was making it. And the cut started around 4. And I remember the, on our itinerary it said the bus left at like 7:30 for the airport. And it was like 7:15 and I hadn't heard anything yet. And she's like, she's like, bailey, like, I think you're fine. Like, like the girls are going to be on their way to the airport soon. Like, I think you made the team. And I was just like pacing back forth and I'm like, no. Like, I don't know. And she's like, just go to bed, like, pretty annoyed. And I remember getting like the knock and I went down and I was all stressed out. And I got into the room and Mel Davidson was sitting across from me along with Dan Church. And I remember they slid a box of Kleenex across the table at me and I was like, oh, boy, here we go. Like, why did I come to camp? All these things are running through my head. And I remember they just looked at me and they said, congratulations, you made the team. And instantly it was like everything I had dreamed of, you know, my whole life was to represent Canada on the senior team. And I just was sobbing. I think I didn't. Oh, yeah. And then Mel looked at Dan and she said, you owe me 20 bucks. So she, she bet that I would cry. And you know, I did. So it was, it was pretty special though. It's something I'll never forget.

If there's one person that knows the players well and has profiled them extensively, it's Mel Davidson.

Exactly.

Number one. And number two, like the. I remember I've described that process a couple times with people, but it was from the August senior camp when they're finding out whether they're staying on and staying on with the team further to go on to the. The series and the fall series and like the whole sequestering or like whole. What. What happened there?

They.

They'd hold everybody into the two hotel rooms or sorry, two, like meeting rooms in the hotel. But nobody's allowed their cell phone. Nobody's allowed their bags. Like everything's. And nobody can. Like, it is. It's a total blackout. And then. And there were people like us, like the strength coaches. We had to be in there to make sure people weren't losing their minds. Like that people weren't having meltdowns and stuff like that. Like, because they probably couldn't keep doing the stay in your hotel room thing anymore. Because whether it's because of cell phones or because of communicating, like they could communicate too easily or I don't know, maybe there's a leak one year, who knows? But probably they, they started like, and then, then you'd get marched straight to your bag and then straight onto the bus. Straight onto the bus.

Oh yeah.

And then you'd the bus and still couldn't have your cell phone because then you still like, there were no media leaks. There were no leaks to any other players. Like everything was so tight. Like so. But nerve wracking. Like you're, you're up all night and then you still don't know. And it's that last moment before you find out. You just like, it's. How, how much more suspense can you handle?

Oh, honestly. And I remember I was just like a nervous wreck. And like I, in my head I'm like, well, either I make this team and I continue playing or like this is it and I go back to school. Like, it was like, this is like my hockey career is make or break or read at this moment. And I was pretty stressed. Shannon was kind of. She just kept telling like she always repeats the story as a joke now because she was just like, it was ridiculous. She didn't sleep and just paced around.

The room all night.

But yeah, it was like, oh God, it was wild. And then, yeah, we went. Ended up going and we were in for Vermont on U.S. soil. And we won in overtime, which was, like, the coolest, you know, thing ever to be a rookie and win a world championship in overtime against the US in their home country. So.

But then you have a taste. You got a taste of what it's really like. Right? Like you're addicted to it.

Exactly. And you know what? The next year, in 2013, we hosted it in Ottawa, and they did the same thing to us. So they beat us. I don't think it was in overtime, but they beat us by one goal in. In Ottawa, So they got their revenge. So.

Yeah, that's painful.

It really was. Yeah.

So take us to when you actually got to the point of being asked to be. To centralize.

Well, I was. I believe that's when I was training with you in London. And. Yeah, 2013. So it would have been. I had one year out of university, and I decided to play in Brampton. So I was living in Woodstock, playing in Brampton, training in London with you. And I remember we were at a practice, and they were doing all the phone calls, and one by one, because there was, like, six or seven national team girls in our team, and one by one, we'd all kind of have to step out of this meeting to accept our phone calls. And they told us, you're either going to make the world championship team in Ottawa and you're centralized, or you're not going to Ottawa, but you are centralized, or you're cut altogether. So those are the three verdicts you could have on this phone call. And I remember right before I went in, Vicki Bendis got her call, and she was a rookie with me the year before in Vermont, and they had told her, you are centralized, but you're not going to Ottawa. And I was just, like. I had seen her, and I saw, like, how emotional she was. And I remember I was just, like. I was, like, shaking. I was so nervous. And, you know, they told me, you made. That you made both rosters and congratulations. And that was kind of, you know, my first. First experience where this is real. Like, I have a chance to represent Canada at the Olympics. Like, I'm so close. And so that was, you know, that was how I found out.

And then Bailey explain to people what being centralized means for those who don't know the process or the hell that you're about to go through.

Yeah. Honestly, that is probably the best way to put it.

Such a gift to be centralized. Like, yeah, right. Yeah, this is your life now.

You couldn't have said it better. So it starts off so 21 players made the team for Sochi, but 28 players get centralized. And what centralized means is you basically are in the pool of players that can make the Olympic team what the process is. So we found out and I believe March come May, we went for a month long boot camp to Penticton. At boot camp they basically their goal is to mentally and physically destroy us and see who can basically last. It's usually like 10 to 12 hours of workouts a day. Swimming and hiking and running and biking and rock climbing and weightlifting. And then we're on the ice and we're doing off ice skills. Every little thing you could possibly think of, we were doing in Penticton. And so that was a month long. And then from there all 28 of us, August 1st we moved to Calgary. And again the first month or so was grueling. It basically was another boot camp. Usually it was 10 to 12 hour days at the rink. We were in charge of making our own lunches. So we'd get home after a long day and we'd have to make lunch for the next day. And you know, it was a grind. And then come September, games started and we were actually in A league with AAA midget guys teams. So we're in the Alberta AAA league and we play, I think it's about 50 games or so against them and then we play a six game series against the US So within from August to December, that's like we're constantly practicing or playing and if we're not, then usually we're in the weight room doing something. So physically, mentally, it's, it's a grind.

And what, what's, what's the toughest part? What is the. I mean he can gloss over it and say it's a grind, but tell.

Us about a day where you like.

Want to get out of your bed.

Where you do not.

Lowest point.

Well, on top of all of that, at any given moment you can be called into their office and you can be sent home. Like you're cut from the team. So like I said, There's 28 players, 21 are going to the Olympics and they have to narrow that decision down. And so every day you are sore, you are tired, you have to get up. Usually around like 6:30. You're at the rink, you're on the ice. I think we practiced last centralization around 8, 8 to 10, we'd have a little bit of a break. You'd eat your lunch, then you'd be in the weight room for two hours. Then we'd have Like a track session. Then we'd have a nutrition meeting or a mental skills meeting, and then we would go back on the ice for two hours, followed by positional meeting just like it never ended. And so basically, you always had to be your best physical mental capacity that you could be because you have to bring it every day because it's. If not, you're getting sent home. So it was. It was hard.

And.

And when did you learn your fate.

Regarding Sochi after four nations. So four nations, I believe, is the first month or first week of November. And a couple players were. Were released from the team then. And there was three more cuts that needed to be made. There's two forwards and one D that needed to be made. Two more. Two more forward cuts, one more D. And they told us the roster had to be finalized by December 23rd, I believe it was. So. Merry Christmas. And I remember they sent out like, a. A schedule of when you'd be going in for your meetings and you'd show up at the rink at this time and. And just like all those other times where you make the team, you kind of. You go into a back door, you go down a weird hallway, you're in, like, a waiting room into another waiting room before you finally go into your coaches meeting. And so I remember looking, and I was, I think, around like, 11am you go for your. Your time slot. And I remember showing up, and I was driving in to where we had to go, and I saw Vicky Bendis leaving, and she was in tears. And I remember I was like, oh, so she must have not made the team. So now it's one forward. And I remember I was, like, pretty confident, like, I thought, you know, I think. I think I made the team. I think I'm gonna go to the Olympics, like, feeling pretty good. And I remember I walked. Walked into the rink, and I saw Rebecca Johnson. She was walking out, and she was my roommate at the time, and she's walking out the one door. And I was like, rebecca, did you make it? And she. She's like, yeah, I did. Like, I'll wait for you out here. So I was going in, and I was pretty nervous, and I got into our first waiting room, and from that, and then it was Robin McDonald, their equipment manager. He came and got me, and he brought me into a different waiting room. And keep in mind, a week and a half before this, our head coach was fired or he stepped down. Whatever happened there, I'm not really sure. So we have a new coach that doesn't really know any of the players. So I was kind of not, like, I was feeling confident, but I didn't really know because I'm like, he's watched me play one game, so we'll see. And I remember I got into the office and I sat down and just kind of like, all the coaches were sitting there, and they all just kind of looked down at the ground, and no one would really look at me. And I remember I was like, oh. I was like, what's. What's going on here? And I remember Kevin Deneen, he started talking, so he was our new coach. And he looked at me and he just said, well, Bailey, it came down to nuts and bolts. And we could have went with bolts. We could have went with nuts. It was so close. It's such a fine line. And we had to make a decision. And this time we went with bolts. So, unfortunately, you're not going to the Olympics. And I remember, like, I couldn't even process what he was saying. Like, I was just sitting there, and I was just like. I couldn't cry. I was just, like, numb. And I just, like. I didn't even know what to say. And they were just like. But that being said, we would like you to be an alternate. And I think. I don't even remember what was going with what they were saying or what they were. You know, I was just there, and I remember. I think they said something about, we want you to be an alternate and come back. And, you know, you never know with injuries what could happen. And I remember walking out, and Mel Davidson was like, hey, do you want me to walk you to your car? And I think I just walked right by her. So if you're listening, I'm sorry about that, but I can't even, like, process what just happened. I remember I was just numb. I walked the parking lot, and Rebecca was waiting for me. And I remember I just, like, dropped to my knees and was just sobbing like, I was a mess. And, yeah, I remember, like, I was supposed to fly out the next day. And I think I. I got home, I. I don't even know what I packed. I threw a bag together, and I got a cab to the airport and got on a standby flight home. And, yeah, it was just, like, I couldn't really process what happened, and it was. It was hard. And the next day, I remember getting a phone call, and they. They kind of elaborated on the alternate thing, and they said, look, we have some injuries right now. You never know what could happen. You are our first alternate. We want you to come Back and play. So we need you to meet the team in two days in Minneapolis. And yeah, and Courtney Burchard was also. She was the defenseman that was cut, but she was named the defenseman alternate. And so they had said the same thing to her. And they said, if a defenseman gets hurt, like, you can be going to the Olympics. So, like, we need you to be a part of the team until then. And so we were texting back and forth and we were like, well, let's. Let's do it. And so I remember we. We met the team two days later, so everything was still pretty numb. And I remember one of the girls, as soon as they. So we were on a different flight than everyone. We got there pretty early, I think I waited in the airport for like three hours before the rest of the team came. And I remember the first thing one of the girls said was, what are you doing here? You got cut. You know, it was just like, oh, God, it was so unorganized. Like, no one had sent an email saying that there was going to be alternates. No one. So the girls didn't know. I mean, I don't blame them. They had no idea. There was no communication, but it was. It was awful. I remember we were there From, I think December 26th, and then they left for. They left for Austria. They went to Austria for a pre camp and I think they left like mid January. And so we had to practice and play basically every single game up until the day they left because there was injuries. So we were told, you know, you guys might be going to Olympics, you might not be. But at the same time, we were. We were kind of treated as outsiders a little bit. I remember, like, schedule stuff. We weren't on the team. Schedule emails. We weren't. We'd stayed on a different floor in the hotel than some of the girls. Like, it was just.

Yeah, that makes no sense.

Yeah, it was. If.

Because if someone's injured and you're pulled into the team, you don't feel like you're part of the team. You want the person coming in to be right in stride and feeling like part of the.

No, absolutely. And that's the thing. It was. It was hard. And for me, like, my role was always like an energy player. I was someone who brought energy. I was loud. I, you know, pumped up my teammates. And I remember, really, when I was playing those games, it was. It was hard to find that balance. And I remember I was like, well, it's not really my role anymore. Like, I'm kind of Here, just filling in for someone. And I remember one of the assistant coaches, like, during this time, like, came up to me and was like, hey, like, you need to bring more energy. You need to be like, you need to get these girls pumped up. Like, you need. That's your job. And I just wanted to be like.

Like, no, you, you.

But, you know, you're there and you just, like, have to hold it in. And I remember it was like every day I would fake a smile at the rink and I'd try to be bubbly and cheery and I'd go home. And I think I literally, like, cried myself to sleep almost every day. Like, it was. It was hard. And I remember the. The day they left for Austria, like, two days before that, I got a random insert Facebook message from some man and he said, hey, do you want to come play in Sweden? Oh, my gosh. Me thinking that it was a good idea, I agreed. So I never met this person. I called my mom, hey, I'm leaving for Sweden tomorrow. Some. Some random man messaged me to play. She's like, no, you're not. I'm like, well, I am. Flight's been booked. So that was. Yeah, so I got cut and I. The day after they left, I left for Sweden and finished the season out there. So.

Oh, my gosh.

Well, at least it wasn't a serial killer in Sweden.

Exactly. And Sweden ended up being, like, one of the best experiences of my life, and it definitely helped in the whole healing process. So I. I really am happy that I took up that offer.

Yeah, you answered my question. Because I wanted to know, where was the recovery? When did that happen? How did you get over it? And how did you reset mentally? Well, I guess that new environment probably is distraction. Shock is probably great.

Yeah. And I remember it, my mom, like, she didn't really want me to go, and she's like, come home. Like, be your own family. Like, will help. And I remember I was like, mom, I cannot be in Canada during the Olympics. Like, all the hype, like, all the hype is on the woman and the men's hockey team. And, you know, like, I. I can't be around for that. Like, everyone in their Canada gear, everyone. I just. I was like, I just need to be away from it. I just need to, you know, do my own thing for a bit. And I remember, I remember I went there and I was thinking, like, this is going to be a walk in the park. Like, we just went through centralization, like 12 hour workout days. And I was like, I'm Just to.

Going.

Gonna have fun. I'm gonna, you know, do my own thing. And I would go there, and the girls would be like, you're not working hard enough in the gym. Like, you need to be lifting heavier. You need to be doing this. And it was funny because I was like, this is. I thought I was gonna be practicing like, once a week, like. But no, we were. We were very intense. But the girls, they were honestly, like, I still am in touch with almost all of them. Like, they all right away took me under their wing. Every single one of them went out of their way to help me, whether it was move in or find different things that I needed or get used to, to the language barrier. And, you know, we ended up winning the championship, and I scored the winning goal in overtime, which was pretty cool. Yeah. So the way that the whole year kind of ended, it was on a high note, and it was awesome. And then when I got home from Sweden, I kind of went back to the drawing board, and I didn't know if I was going to keep playing. And I didn't touch my equipment from March till I think I went almost to September camp. And my trainer at the time was Jeff Wood. And he had told me, he said, bales, I think we went for. We went for coffee, we sat down, and he just said, what? Like, what do you want? And I was like, well, I don't know if I'm ready to keep playing. I don't know if I, you know, mentally am there to start training again and do this. All I need, like, I don't know if I'm ready. And he said to me, said, just come in and we'll start training. You don't need to go on the ice. We don't need to do anything, but at least it'll keep your doors kind of open. If you want to go to September camp, you are in shape. You're ready to go. And somewhere along that summer, I remember kind of sitting there and I was like, I'm gonna do this, and I'm gonna do it right this time. And I remember I made some goals, which was kind of new for me. I was always kind of went with the flow and hope for the best. And I remember sitting there and I said, okay, for the next four years, if I'm going to do this, if I'm going to make this Olympic team, these are my goals. And it was every single fitness testing, have my results improve. So every single time, whether it's my beep test, my chin ups, they were going to get better. I was never going to get worse. And we have two tournaments a year in non Olympic years, so we have a four nations tournament in November and we have our world championships in April. And my goal was to make all six tournaments leading up in the three years not of non Olympic year. And I did that. And my other goal was to never, ever give them a reason to cut me. So make sure that your nutrition is on point. My mental capacity was on point. I was getting my rest. So I literally was tracking everything I ate. I was meeting with the nutritionist, I was meeting with the sports psych. I was training like I'd never trained before. I was training smarter. I was, you know, I basically stopped drinking altogether. I didn't really go out, and if I did, I would have waters. While the rest of the girls were, you know, having fun partying, I made sure to get, like, adequate amount of sleep. And like, everyone kind of jokes about it and they're like, you, you're. You're nuts. But it was like, I was so committed to doing all the things that I could control, to be the best Bailey that I could be, because I never wanted to give them a reason to cut me again. And so that was kind of my mindset. And I said, if I ever did not make a team, like, that would probably be it. So at some point, if I didn't make a world's team, I'd probably just call it. And no, I kept making them. And.

First of all, like, it's. It's such a lesson. There's. There's such big lessons there that you were open enough to receive, which is such a hard thing for most people to do. And one of the lessons is that you. You realize that there was still so much. That so much room to still improve. You know, there's lots of people who will say, oh, I did everything I could and I got cut, or, you know, whatever it is. But when you fully look at it and you feel, fully understand that, you know, no, there's more to do if I'm ever going to say that I did everything I could. And that's a huge lesson to absorb. And the second thing I was looking at is that one of the things about the women's national hockey team is that in Canada, it's one of the. Hockey is the sport in Canada that has the most resources than compared to any other national sport. Sport. And what you did is you took so much of what you learned and then expanded on it even further because had you not been with a National team, you wouldn't have known how vital it is for your nutrition or your sports psych or your physical conditioning. But they ingrained all of that into you through the U18, through the U22, through being in centralization. And then you took that and took it the step further to really, really embrace it and really understand that, okay, now I need to really make sure all of these pillars of my training, my performance enhancement is being addressed. And so, like, kudos to you because so many people really don't understand what it takes, and so many people don't actually do what it takes. And because you did, you tapped into everything that you had in order to get to that.

Just.

It's always diminished returns at this level. It's always diminished returns. So there's so much more that has to be done on all of those parameters in order to get to that next step and that next improvement and that next goal. So, like, huge hats off to you. You deserved every, every bit of that.

Oh, well, thank you. And I know, like, I remember, like, you, you knew me four years ago or five years ago, and, you know, I took shortcuts and I was someone who. I kind of had an attitude. And my whole life, my whole life, I got by basically on my skill. And, you know, I. With the boys, I was always one of the best players with Team Manitoba. I was one of the best players at Mercyhurst. I was one of the best players and I made teams because of that. And, you know, U18s, U22s, I would, you know, I'd listen to the nutrition talks, I'd listen to the sports psych talks, but none of it really resonated with me. And, you know, to be that close to making the team but be told, like, you know, it came down to nuts and bolts. So it literally could have went either way.

You're. You're never going to forget that.

I will never forget that. But, you know, to be that close, I remember I was like, what could I have done differently? And then, you know, I look back and I'm like, well, I could have done this. I probably could have done that. I could have done that. And, and moving forward, you know, my role on the national team has always been a third or fourth line player. And my whole life it was first line. That was my. I was on the first line. And the first time I went through the centralization process, I remember it was like, I was always, like, wanting to be on the first or second line, and I never really embraced my third or fourth line. Role to the fullest. And this time around, you know, I was like, you know what? If that's where they want me to be, I'm going to be the best darn shot blocker, penalty killer, fourth line encourager that this team's ever seen. And, you know, I truly lived it and I, like, embraced it. And I was, you know, to this day, I have girls that come and, you know, they say, like, we wouldn't have won that game without you because, you know, you just brought so much energy on the bench, or we couldn't imagine doing that without you. And, you know, stuff like that almost means more to me than if I were the one to score a big goal. So, yeah.

Yeah. And it's that I remember before the 2014 Olympics, one of the biggest messages from the sports psych was to know your role, that everybody has a role and know your role and step into that. And. And it's like what you said. A lot of people don't fully understand what that means because they're still so busy in their own heads defining what they think their role should be versus what their role really is and what they've been asked to do.

No, absolutely. Like, I remember, like, if it was I was on the power play one day and then if I wasn't the next day, you know, I read into all those things and I'd be, like, kind of pissed off, and I was bitter. Like, what did I do wrong? Instead of, like, thinking, what can I do to be the best at this new role that I, you know. Yeah, I think in. After getting cut, it took, you know, I think it was almost a blessing in disguise because made me grow up and it taught me a lot of life lessons. And I think I've matured as a person and growing as a person so much from that experience. So I honestly wouldn't trade it for anything.

Yeah, it's incredible. You. Basically what I'm hearing you describe is the process of being cut and going to Sweden and recovering mentally. You turned into a professional. You went from being a really good hockey player to being a really, really good professional in every aspect of that, of the nutrition of, you know, doing everything you could to be the best you could possibly be.

And that.

That's just that that message that you're giving is what every athlete needs to hear. What everyone needs to hear in general in their life to get the most out of this life we have is you've got to get professional about it and just maximize every gift you're given and every opportunity Every connection. And, yeah, it's just an amazing story. And I want to know, how did it feel turning into that person, that incredible force of professionalism, you know, to walk into the stadium at the Olympics having made it? What. What was that like? Were you just.

Yeah.

Flying? Do you remember it? Was it just a blur?

You know, it really was. And going back, like, when we found out, we made it, so it was the same process. And you go. You go through the back doors and you don't see anyone. And I remember being almost twice as nervous this time around because I'd been through it and I knew how it felt. And I was just like, this can happen again. But it was almost also like, I've done everything I can, so if it does happen, well, then it's not meant to be. And I remember I walked into the waiting room area that they put me in, and I looked up and the light was, like, flickering on and off like a scary movie. And I was like, this can't be good. And I, like, kind of laughed at myself, and I said, this isn't good. And our assistant coach, he's actually from Manitoba, so I've known him for a while, and he's the one that came to get me to bring me into the coach's room. And I was, like, trying to lighten the mood, and I was like, oh, good morning, Chewy. And he was like, follow me. Like this, like, monotone voice. And I was just like, oh, no, this is not going to be good. And I remember I walked into the meeting and coaches were sitting in there, and Mel was sitting. She would have been sitting beside me, so there's a chair. So she was beside me. The other coaches were behind the desk, and I was like, oh, boy. And I'm sitting there, and our coach, Laura Shuler, is kind of. You know, she's not. Not looking like she's about to tell me, like, you just made the team. Like, she looks like she's going to deliver some bad news. And I'm just like, oh, okay, spit it out. Let's go. And again, they slide the Kleenex over, and I was just like, oh, no. And she stood up and she said, congratulations on becoming an Olympian. And I remember it was just like the biggest weight just fell off my shoulders, and I was just a mess. I think I cried two days straight, probably every time I thought about it. And it was just, like, surreal.

You know, what are they gonna do when that Kleenex box runs out? They're still passing it back and forth.

On the desk all day long, seriously. And, you know, they all, you know, right away gave us hugs. And, you know, we didn't really find out too much more info. They just said, you're gonna go home for Christmas tomorrow. We'll follow up. You'll be back at this time, but enjoy it. Congratulations. There's, like, team dinner tonight to celebrate, but I remember I went out and I think I called every single one of my siblings, my mom and dad individually, because I wanted them all to hear it from me. And every single one of them, every one of them cried, which was kind of cool. So.

So such an emotional, like, wonderful, kind of cathartic feeling.

It really was. And, you know, I think everyone had seen how hard I'd worked to attain it and how crushed I was last time. And I think without my family, without their support, I definitely, you know, I wouldn't have been able to do it. And so for them, it was almost, you know, they were just as big of a part of it as I was. And they were also making the team and they were all booking their flights to go to the Olympics. And, you know, it was just a really special day. And so fast forward like a month and we get there. It was literally the coolest thing I've ever done. Like, every single aspect of it. I think I just soaked everything in and, you know, I was pin trading in the village and I was like, yeah, you know, meeting other athletes and just, you know, experiencing it all to the fullest. And, you know, the moment where we got our Olympic jerseys and, you know, the vets kind of, we had this little ceremony where the vets, one of the vets would all give you your jersey, and Megan, Augusta gave me mine with the Mercyhurst connection. And I remember we both started crying, and it was just like we wore them for picture day first, and then we, you know, got. Got that out of the system and. But when we went on the ice for the first time, and I remember he was seeing my dad in the stands of this jersey, and it was just like, I think I cried and warm up. Like, I was just so, like this. This is real. Like, I made it. I did this. And so it was definitely still kind of looking back, it's still kind of surreal.

So, yeah, what an incredible, incredible experience. And even all of the. Not only the women's hockey program in Canada, but even the small rituals between the vets and the rookies create a legacy for the Canadian team. And in that. In that bigger picture, doing something that's greater than just yourself and for you, do you have an idea of what you want your legacy to be? You know, this is part of who you are, and nobody can take that away from you. But you have still a long way to go on this earth. And is this something that you're. You're gonna go for another Olympics?

Are you.

Do you have other things in mind? Like, what do you picture your. For your legacy in this world?

You know, what I'm like in this weird little. Well, taking the year off this year. And so right now, I'm kind of in this transition where, you know, I'm letting every injury I have heal, and I'm planning my wedding, and we just built a house, and I'm still on this, like, Olympic High, basically. But it's been weird not playing. And I, you know, I'm in contact with all the girls that, you know, are playing in Calgary, all my teammates, and to not be there has been weird and not, like, being there, group chat and all those different things you miss out on. But, you know, it's a tough question, like, if I'm gonna keep going back and keep playing and try for another four years, I'm still kind of on the fence, and right as of now, probably leaning towards no, but, you know, as I'm still training and still keeping the door open. Keeping the door open. Exactly. So it's funny because I go to the gym sometimes and I'm like, oh, I don't really want to do that today. So I'll do this because I don't have anyone telling me what I have to do or what.

Yeah, exactly.

That's been pretty refreshing. So we'll see. I'm playing for fun in, like, a beer league and whatnot. So we'll see. Yeah.

So let's wrap up with a few little questions here so people can get to know you a little better. What do you want people to know about you that most people wouldn't know? It could be something quirky or unique or whatever. But what would most people not know about you?

Well, there's a weird thing is I'm blind in my left eye. Legally blind.

I did not know that.

Yes. So I wear one contact and my glasses have one side prescription.

Isn't that bizarre? And that's been your whole life?

It has been my whole life, yes.

Wow.

Well, that's, you know, don't say that out loud because opponents are gonna go for you on that side. I always say to Paul, like, we'll be sitting on the couch together and I'll, like, wave at him to try and get his attention without making sound or whatever. And I swear, he's got no peripheral vision. I'm like, how were you ever a professional athlete? You can't see anything out of your face.

I can turn it on and off.

Yeah, right.

Only use it when I need it.

Hilarious.

Okay, so how about things like, what would your favorite food be? Or favorite dessert?

Oh, well, dessert is, hands down, pumpkin pie, cheesecake. Oh, my gosh. Whoa. Perfect.

It's time of year. This is your time of year. Then that's great.

It is. And it's like, it's everywhere. But I've been trying to say no.

And how about favorite. Any favorite foods or top couple?

I think fruit. Everyone with the national team, there's a joke. They call me the fruit monster because literally, like, if the fruit platter is out, like, I'm the first one there, and I have all the cantaloupe and all the honeydew and all the strawberries and watermelon, and they're just like, are you kidding? Like, yeah. And I literally could live off fruit.

I. I think that's coming from a really large family because whenever. Whenever there's sweets or certain things and really large families, like, they go so fast that you just gotta, like. You gotta learn to survive and sometime it's free.

Exactly.

What about a favorite movie?

Harry Potter. All of them.

Awesome.

All of them.

Awesome.

Can you pick a favorite of the number four?

Oh, sweet.

Like, yeah. Goblet of Fire.

Is that at. Okay, it's after Ask.

Yeah. Yeah. Okay.

Yeah, like, we.

Oh, it's like an Olympics, isn't it? That one.

Yeah. That's the. The Tri wizard cup. Yes. There we go.

Of course. That's your favorite. Yeah. We had my oldest. I don't know if you remember Raina, but she. She had to read each book before we would get to watch the movie together. Oh, I love that because the timing was right when the books came out, and it just worked for her age because she's born in 2000, and it was such a great system to have because she'd be so excited to finish a book, and then we'd all get to watch the movie and. Yeah, it was good.

Awesome.

What about favorite book?

You know what? I have a lot, but I recently reread all the Harry Potter books, and I just love them. But being said, I really like Andre Agassiz's book Open. Oh, cool. Yeah, that's one of my favorite books. It's just really honest, and it talks about his struggles and his Ups and downs with sport and the pressures that he had from his family. And it's a really, really good read. So if you guys haven't read it, highly, highly recommend that book from our interviews.

I'm starting to make a little book list here going.

This is perfect.

And do you have a favorite, some favorite music?

Probably anything country.

Nice.

Yeah. And favorite hobby, Anything that's. That kind of gets your attention Outside.

Of hockey, I love to bake.

Oh, I know, right?

Yes, I love to bake and really just love hanging out with family. So we built our house, like literally I could hit a golf ball to my parents house. And so I always take my dog for a walk and we end up at mom and dad's, always in their pantry stealing their food.

Yeah, I was gonna say, do you walk with any laundry?

Yeah, I should do that.

Hey, mom.

Yeah, exactly.

That's, that's our nightmare. That's our nightmare. What you.

Right.

No, we won't do your laundry.

No.

And what about, do you have any, any tips to young up and coming hockey players? Like any advice or tips to people in your sport?

Well, for one, I would say be a multi sport athlete. Like don't just do one sport, don't just play hockey, don't just play soccer, whatever it is, that is your number one sport. You know, don't make it everything. And I just love the idea of a multi sport athlete and just the way your body, you know, develops and your movement patterns and your balance and your coordination and I think you just become a more well rounded athlete and then in the long run you will be a better hockey player or soccer player, whatever it is that you decide to do, you'll be better off because you were a multi sport athlete. And then also someone once told me, just always make sure you're having fun with what you're doing. And you know, I take pride in always having fun and you know, sometimes maybe get in trouble for having a little bit too much fun and you know, on the benches and stuff. But you know, to me it's still a game and it's still something that, you know, you're, you're going to work and it is your job, but at the same time it is still a game. And so if you can have fun with it, you're gonna be that much better.

Oh, that's fantastic. One of the many things we adore about you. So thank you so much for being with us, Bailey. This has been such a treat and.

You are such an exciting, incredible person.

And athlete and we're so lucky to know you. So thank you again for being with us.

Well, thank you guys for having me. This is awesome.

Thank you so much for listening. To get more support in living your best life, find us in our free Facebook community Empowered Top Performers. We're on Instagram, Paul Durden and powerconditioning. Please share this podcast and rate us. A five star review would mean the world to us. That is how we connect with and support more people to excel in sport and life. Take what you learned today and try it. Progress is perfection.