EP84 Mindset Monday - Are you a hater?

This is episode 84 of the Empowered Athlete podcast. This is the Empowered Athlete podcast Mindset Monday 10 minutes with Kari Schneider to learn new mindset tactics and tricks to optimize your performance in sport, business and life.

For this welcome to Mindset Monday. Today we are talking about haters. So here's the question. Are you a hater? Sounds kind of crazy. Yeah. Because I would bet that if I asked you, are you a hater? You'd say no. And if I went further and asked you, what do you think about your teams or competitors at work? So competitive teams, other teams that you work against, what do you think about them? And if I asked you those things, you might then spew a few things that sound like, well, I really don't like them or they're such jerks or whatever. I know that I've seen this time and time again with sports teams that they will end up hating on the other team in all sorts of ways. So what if I asked you, what do you say about the person who did you wrong? Maybe it's an ex spouse, maybe it is a friend who really let you down. Maybe there's an abusive past. So what do you say about that person? And then, as I keep asking these questions, you might find that you've got a little bit of hater in you after all, and you didn't maybe realize that. What about those people who do really awful things in the world? Maybe it's abuse against children, maybe it is crimes against humanity, maybe it is noise in our street. Now, what is it that really spawns you to start to say a few things that you may not like? And if I ask enough questions, what about the rapist? What about the child abuser? What about the sex trafficker? What about the person who really ruined your business or your life or something like that? Then you might find it in you to say a few things that you really don't like. So there's a hater in us all in some form or another, because we're all human, because we all have it within us to do those things, no matter how awful they are, hurt people, hurt people. So here's what it comes down to with Mindset Monday. One thing that I noticed years ago in working with the highest level teams, so national teams, national level individual athletes, when that was the case, those athletes would always say about their competitor. They would talk in a tone of respect. Those athletes would speak as though they were humbled to be able to go up against that group or that individual in competition. So they might talk as though you, you know, well, when we meet the Polish, we're really looking forward to intense competition, blah, blah, blah, things like that. Same thing for individual competitors, especially in swimming and track. They're always head to head with similar people because there's only a few of the best in the world. And when those competitors speak about their competition or the person that's their rival, they would speak in words of the utmost respect and also humility. But at the same time, there is the highest level of positive rivalry, the highest level of competition. But they're never making them bad or making them wrong. Often they're not. But then I noticed that in coming down to work with lower level athletes, community groups, and I couldn't believe what I was hearing from one sport team to another. They'd be talking about like the girls would be talking about the other players as bitches or this and that and like awful, awful things. And I'm thinking to myself, why are you sinking to this level to speak about them when that doesn't serve you and they don't even care, they don't even know you're talking about them that way. So the strength and the bigger elevation really comes in, in finding the compassion and finding the empathy for those that you would think awfully about even if they did harm to you. When years ago, I was in somewhat abusive situations and I demonized a person for years and years and years, and I didn't realize how heavy it was on me until I came to a point where I came to absolute and utter forgiveness. And little did I know how much that would free me in my overall perception of the world. But my overall emotional state, I was so much lighter and so much happier and felt so much better, I didn't even realize how weighed down I was by all the hate I was carrying for this particular person for so many years. And once I came to that point of forgiveness, it had nothing to do with them. It had everything to do with me and freeing up all the things that I was hanging onto and hating on them. So the challenge here for Mindset Monday is take a look at Consider that your best freedom comes from forgiveness. Your best strength, your best leadership comes from getting to that point where you have empathy and compassion. When some other team or some other competitive competitor in business has a low point, do you attack? Do you respect? Do you lift a hand to elevate them up? What is it that you're going to do to be the best version of yourself, to be the leader, to be the stronger person and to offer a level of strength, empathy and compassion that does not come from hating. Hating on somebody else is the easy thing to do. Making someone wrong is the easy thing to do. And what we don't realize when we're doing all of those things is that we're doing that to ourselves. We're carrying that ourselves. We're carrying all that negativity and all of those feelings ourselves. So that is the message today for Mindset Monday is find the empathy, Find the compassion. See what's there for you that you can get into your greatest leadership and your greatest strength in looking at something not from a place of judgment or hate, but from a place of empathy and compassion. From a place that says if I am a judger or a hater on that group or on that person, all that's doing is bringing that down on me. So consider that for today's Mindset Monday, you can still be an amazing competitor. You can still be incredibly driven and you can still go after your dreams and whatever you want with gusto or grow your business or play your sport or whatever it is and not become any weaker by not judging or hating on the other other side or the other group. So I hope that serves you today. Pop me a little thumbs up or high five or whatever. Pop some questions in too. If you have some topics or you have some things that you want to hear about, I will dive into the on it because I love learning about this stuff. Have a fantastic Monday and amazing rest of your week. Set your intention. What do you want to do? Who do you want to be? What do you want to accomplish this week? And go for it.