EP92 Mindset Monday - Let's get ready to Rumble!

This is episode 92 of the Empowered Athlete podcast. This is the Empowered Athlete podcast Mindset Monday 10 minutes with Kari Schneider to learn new mindset tactics and tricks to optimize your performance in sport, business, and life.

Today for Mindset Monday, we're going to talk about what it means to rumble a little bit and the kind of mindset that needs to be present in order to rumble in a way that's effective. When I say rumble, you might think of wrestling match with your, with your kids in the living room, or maybe you're thinking of, you know, west side Story or whatever. But rumble in this case, case is the kind of conversation that is had, that gets really vulnerable and really deep. Hey, Rachel. And has a lot of heartfelt communication and function in the conversation and where this is coming from. I'm going to show you a book that I read recently that I absolutely adore. It's called Dare to Lead by Brene Brown. And she has been involved in research on vulnerability for very long time and done a lot of work and a lot of presentations on it. So I want to define what it means to rumble and then take a look at how that relates to courage. So first of all, a rumble is a discussion, conversation, or meeting defined by a commitment to lean into vulnerability, to stay curious and generous, to stick with the messy middle of problem identification and solving, to take a break and circle back when necessary, to be fearless in owning our parts and to listen with the same passion with which we want to be heard. And typically, we tend to want to be heard so badly or our opinions are already coloring what we think so much that we can't hear the other person. And when we can't hear the other person, we can't possibly seek to understand in a way that's going to problem solve or in a way that's going to get forward with what we want with that communication. As a personal example, the two areas I find the most challenging communication is with my husband and with close family members like my father. So if I think of my father yesterday, we're having a sensitive conversation around health, and it is sensitive for him. There's certain things he does that I don't want him to do, but because I don't want him to do that, I'm already coming in with my own judgments. I'm already coming in with my own preconceived ideas. However, I chose, based on this type of research and based on this type of concept, I chose to go in yesterday with a keener listening, a more passionate listening and a more heartfelt listening. And in doing so, fewer barriers come up. It's an easier conversation, and he's more likely to share more about how he feels, despite there being some differences in what we think about certain things. So I'm going to go on to show you how the Rumble or this type of conversation and discussion leads to courage. So Brene Brown goes on to say, our research led to a very clear, very hopeful finding. Courage is a collection of four skills that can be taught, observed and measured. The four skill sets are rumbling with vulnerability. So what I just defined that rumble. Living into our values, braving trust, and learning to rise. So those are the four key measurable skill sets that lead to courage. Now, when you're thinking of leading your family, you're thinking of leading at your workplace or who you want to be as an individual for your team, whoever you're working with. These are going to be skill sets that typically are uncomfortable because we never learn them in school and no one ever taught us this. You're lucky if you have a family member or people within who you grew up with that actually understood how important it is to be able to be vulnerable and be able to communicate in such a way or even find your own values. So chances are you, like me, are in a situation where you're completely oblivious as to how to work with these four skill sets. Rumbling with vulnerability, living into our values, braving trust. To actually trust someone, that is a scary thing, especially for me. And learning to rise, learning to rise above, into our higher selves so that we're not succumbing to our fears or succumbing to what our preconceived ideas, judgments or thoughts are. So this is a whole realm that is challenging at best and at the same time, bloody rewarding. This is the kind of thing that gets us closer with our family members, that gets us driving harder, and problem solving with our teams at work or on the court or on the field. This is the kind of thing that has us bond with trust, that builds friendships and relationships for life. So it's really worth diving into practicing because it does not happen easily at first. But practicing the act and the effort and the skill of becoming vulnerable and actually learning what our values are. Most of us don't know what our values are. I have a great exercise for that. So lastly, what I challenge you to do is take a look in your life where you have the most challenging problem solving or discussions. Is it with your family? Is it with work? Where does that challenge come up and Take a look at that. Take a look at how you might be able to rumble with vulnerability and be interested in this book. Might be a great Christmas present. So maybe put that on your Christmas list. Have a great week, guys. Go and pop in a question on here if you're interested in learning a little more about that section that I just talked about. And feel free to write down and post in our Facebook group. What is your area that's the most challenging? Is it work? Is it when you get up against a car conflict? Is it with family? Where is your most challenging area to rumble with vulnerability? Have a great week, guys.