Work & Relationship Game Changers: The Top Personality Quizzes

This is episode 287 of the Empowered Team Podcast. Welcome to the Empowered Team Podcast where we explore how to optimize your performance in career, sport and life. And now your host, executive coach and life strategist, Kari Schneider.

Welcome. Welcome to the Empowered Team Podcast. I am your host, Kari Schneider, and I am here today day specifically to help you become more aware of yourself. How, how today are we going to do this? I'm going to dive into my favorite personality test. Yes, right. Bet you never thought you might be interested in figuring out more about yourself. Well, if you're listening to this podcast, I imagine that you are. And I've paired it down to some of my favorite tests. I'm going to tell you why they are my favorites and I'm also going to point to the ones that I think are will be most pertinent to you in what areas. So we're going to break it down into three areas we like to talk about the most. Our three spheres of influence. Because this is what makes up our leadership and they are our career or mission. There are self and our relationships. Those three spheres of influence basically make up every single thing we do in life. So. Well, let's dive in. I got into personality tests a long time ago, not by choice. So the first one that I did when I was entering the Canadian Sport Institute, when I was working for the highest level of sport in Canada, and the sports psychologist had done a disc test on everyone in the company and in the organization, everyone had done this. A while back. I got hired and then they did the disc test, test, test with me. And it turns out he was so fascinated because the average of everyone else's disc tests would have matched perfectly if you overlaid it on top of mine. So my disc test was very much like the average of everyone else who worked there. And there were people of very, very different personalities. There were people who were in physical, doing physical PhDs and people who are in marketing for high performance sports and people who are high level coaches. So it was, it was a very interesting and diverse group of men and women and they, I had done my disc test, I had no idea and of what it would be like. And the questions seem really weird to me. I thought that I, you know, I didn't know kind of what this test meant and if I was going to get it right or wrong or if it was going to be good or bad or any of those things. But that was the very first time I ever did the discovery test. Now in years later, that was gosh that was probably 20 years ago or more than 20 years ago. And in the years since, I've done the disc test at least two more, no, three more times. So that's just an example of when I was first exposed to these tests. However, as time went by, I was exposed to different ones. You might have heard of the Love Languages. You might have heard of things like Enagram or Strength Finder. These different tests had come up in various ways. Ways. So because I've done so many of them, and because I look at leaders and support leaders so frequently, I'd like to share with you the ones that I think are the best to serve you and the ones that are broken down into different categories. So even if I think one might be great for you, you might not be interested in one that's regarding workplace. You might be interested in one that's regarding your intimate relationship. You might be interested in one that's regarding your family because you're really having a hard time connecting with your child. You might be interested in one that's more about yourself because you're having a hard time understanding yourself since you've been serving other people or pleasing other people for so many years. So for you, you may find a, an assessment or a test in this podcast that really helps you gain greater awareness of yourself, gain greater awareness of your own strengths, gain greater awareness of your weaknesses, or the areas where you would like to learn more about yourself. So that's what we're going to peel back today. And, and guess what? If you look in the show notes, I'm going to make sure that we have links to every one of these tests. So it's really easy for you just to dive in, grab it, do the test. I just pulled them up and did the research for you so, so that you can figure yourself out more. Why? Because I believe that the more you understand yourself, the more you love yourself, the more you grow yourself, the more you're going to keep giving to the world. It is our tagline. If you can be your best, you can give your best. So let's dive in. Let's be our best today. Workplace. The ones that are most popular in the workplace are the Myers Briggs and the Disc. And you can even go online and find entities that will encompass both of those tests along with another one like, I think it's called the Holland test. And they'll use those because they're so popular in the workplace, especially corporate environments. Corporate environments love to use the DISC test, especially disc and sometimes combined with Myers Briggs there's another test that gets used a lot in the workplace called the TASE test and that one tends to have a background from high performance sport and utilizing the mental strengths in high performance sports and translating those across to the workplace. TASE is T, I won't have that link, but I will have the link to Myers Briggs and I will have the link, link to the disc test. D I S C Now I think most people I've interacted with are most familiar with the disc test and that's the one that I'm most familiar with as well. The, the problem I see in this test is that oftentimes people are, if, if, if it's their first exposure to the disc test, it's often in a situation where they are going into trying to garner a position, they're trying to get hired in a certain role. And so employers are often putting this test out so that they can understand the person's personality more before they hire them, before they're in that three month trial period, probationary period because they want to understand whether that person's going to be a great fit with their team currently or who they're looking for for the role. The problem is though that when the person is in that situation and they've never taken a personality test before and they really want the role, put yourself in their shoes, they're going to want to answer the questions the best way, the right way, the way that they think they're supposed to answer them. And so again, put yourself in their shoes. What do we know about society? We know that society tends to favor people who are go getters, people who are a players, people who get a lot done, people who are doers. That's what our especially North American society favors. So whether the person is aware of that or not, they likely will have a bias in that area. Believing that society wants that, believing that their employer wants that, are they going to answer the questions a little bit differently to favor that societal norm? Who knows? Who knows? Now I personally have done the disc test four times and in those four times the results have come out subtly different because there's been years. Over a decade was between my first test and my second test. So there's been years between the tests. However, ultimately they still come out with the same, the same type of profile. But I do remember in the very first time I filled it out, I wasn't worried about getting the job. I already had the job. The disc test was done for me after I had the job. So I was just un, uncertain, unfamiliar I had some self doubt but I still filled it out the way I, I thought were the best answers for me. And I was getting to know myself at that time. I was in my late 20s, so I was still uncertain about what I knew about myself and I was evolving in my own personality at that time. However, so many workplaces are giving this test before they've hired and if that's the case then I personally, this is my own opinion, it is not based on any fact. I personally believe that many people would be likely to answer the questions in the way they think they're supposed to be versus just answering the questions. Whereas if you're giving the test after you've hired, I think that's a different scenario. The second part of it though is that some leaders that I've worked with, we've used the disc as a way to filter some of the candidates who are being potentially interviewed. So for instance, if a job position gets put out on the interweb and everybody is available to apply for this, it's not an internal posting, it goes everywhere, it's external, it's everything. And if that posting goes out there and there are going to be thousands of responses, instead of having that business leader filter through that, there's an automated email reply. And in that email reply they can answer very specific questions. If they don't answer those questions, they don't go through to being able to submit the resume or go through to be a candidate for interviewing. So it's another way to filter and the disc in that reply email can be one way to do that where if their disc isn't completed then the person just doesn't move forward with interviewing them. It's not what they got on the disc. When we use this technique of filtering, it's the fact that they completed it, it's the fact that they did what they were asked to on that reply email when that automated reply email when they've tried to apply for the job. So if they've completed the disc, if they've replied to what was requested on that email, then it tells you a lot about the person in terms of their follow through, whether their disc profile is what you want or not. So that, and I would suggest too that you do not want. If you've got people who typically the DI are more outgoing people, if you've got people who are a little more DI on the disc profile, it doesn't mean you want all of that in the workplace unless you have people that are a little more introverted people who are Able to step back, get more perspective, see the bigger picture. Those people are going to balance out a workplace. You're not looking for go getters all of the time because you're, you're going to likely miss perspectives. If you have people who think the same way, it's not going to be a great thing, but for the overall workplace. So in the workplace, the ones that are the most popular, I would say are the Myers Briggs and the disc test. Those two will put the links in the show notes so that you can explore where your results are on those. If you are interested or even start to use them in hiring processes, use them in figuring out more about the personalities of the people who are already on your team. All right, the next category we're going to go into is self, self, self. We have the first one is strengths Binder. Gallup did this. They've done tons of research on the strengths finder and there are such great results coming from, from that research. For instance, when people know their strengths, they tend to be more likely to use their strengths. When people know their strengths, they tend to have more of a satisfied outlook in their workplace. When people have a best friend in the workplace. This is more research that Gallup has done. When people have a best friend in the workplace, their work is not only likely to be better, but they're also likely to stay at that space more for a longer span of time. So strengths finder, years ago you might have seen people put on their LinkedIn or their email sign offs some of their strengths. So they might have been a relator or responsibility. And there's typically a five top strengths. And then the strengths finder will go deeper into what those mean in your life. So that one I find as really valuable for understanding yourself, how you tick. And it can be useful in the workplace too. However, I think it's more beneficial in the workplace because of knowing yourself. That's why I put it in the self category. And I'll give you an example. I did this strength finder again many years ago and then I did it again. So I've done it three times. In those three times that I've done the strength finder, my top five, I believe they were different in one of the two tests, but it was only different by one of the strengths and then this, the other one. The difference was only the order of my five strengths. So ultimately my top five strengths end up being achiever, futuristic, strategic responsibility and relator. And when I look at those, I do some solid nodding because those could be great words to describe how I show up in the world. And they are also a reminder to me that, okay, if I put too much emphasis on achievement, then these other areas that are strengths of mine that I absolutely adore, which might be responsibility or relating to other people or future vision. If I'm too focused on the achievement, sometimes the relating might not give the the attention that I absolutely love. So the strengths finder can be one that I think is very beneficial for you diving into more of yourself. And that one is by Gallup. There's so much research behind it. I am a science geek. I love the research because I love to know that it has been Vette that's been validated. I love to know that holds water for not just one person or a handful of people, but a lot of people and in different contexts, not just the workplace, but in life in general. The next one for self that I would love to point to and I'm so into this one. There's a book that you can read on this. It's called the Five Archetypes. It's based on Chinese practices or Asian, I shouldn't say Chinese, but Asian practices. And there's even some AIC theories in with it as well. But the five archetypes are basically putting people into the buckets of, of wood, fire, earth, metal or water. And I personally, even though I've for years I had already done disc and other tests and strength finders, when I did this test, it really was a game changer for not only understanding myself with more grace and more compassion, but also my relationship with Paul. Paul and I did this and it just, it really had. I had multiple light bulb moments around how we would interact with each other. So it was really powerful for both of us. So the temptation here is to put this in relationships as well. However, I found that for me personally it really has helped me so I put it into self. So five archetypes. These ones, when you discover that you are wood and you are a go getter and nothing is fast enough, or you discover you are metal and you are are so perfectionistic and love aesthetics or you discover you are fire and you tend to be really animated and really energetic. But then you really lose your energy fast and you discover how each. Each feeds into the next and how they affect each other and how water flows and can see the bigger picture and really can connect. Has us, I think, connect to ourselves and connect to each other and connect to the world in a way that is more comprehensive, holistic, grounded instead of the way that tests like maybe Strengths Finder or Myers Briggs tend to be very boxed, very focused on, on specific areas of humanness. Whereas the five archetypes tends to not only take our personalities into account, but also how we connect with others and how we connect with the world and how one thing fuels the next. If you happen to be, if you happen to be fire, then wood fuels fire, whereas fire can burn wood out. And when you understand yourself in the context with other people's personalities, you really start to see how you interact with them, but also what refuels you in the world. So if wood needs water, so I happen to be number one archetype is wood. And where I can refuel, where I can not feel like I am so depleted from being go, go, go, would drive hard all the time, is when I'm with water, when I'm drinking water, when I'm around water, when I'm near the ocean, that rejuvenates me. So the thing I really love about the five archetypes is that yes, it takes our personalities into account, yes, it pulls into how we interact with other people, but, but it also connects to how we engage and how we refuel and how we contribute and how we connect with the world as well. So I love the five archetypes that will be linked in here as well. And for self, I've got two honorable mentions. I'm not going to have the links for these. You can look them up if you'd like to. But one is the Human Design. These are charts, human design charts based on your exact time of birth, the month, the year, all of those metrics of when you were born, when you came into the world. And it's more of an astrological association. And this human Design, I have had someone do my charts. I have also listened to some of the creators of human design on podcasts and I have to say it's, it's a little woo woo for me. But I also embrace that aspect of it because I really can accept that there's so much beyond my understanding and beyond my awareness. So who am I to say that if there's not a bunch of sciency research about it, who am I to say that it doesn't work and that it's not fantastic? And I can say that when I had my human design chart done, then really hit the nail on the head. The person who described, oh, you are going to be this, this, this and this based on your results. And I was like, okay, yeah, that sounds like me a lot. And then the next One that I've heard great things about, but I haven't had, I haven't done the quiz and I haven't had someone give feedback on it is Enneagram. I've simply heard some wonderful things from other people who have done Enneagram and how accurate it is on their personality and their interactions with others. But again, it's one that's a little, little less research for my liking. So I'm giving you ones that I'm a little more confident with. And I find that the five archetypes kind of mixes that blend of the two for me. All right, let's move on to relationships. Oh, gotta Steve, save the relationships for last. Remember the quality of your relationships that will dictate the quality of your life. There's research from Harvard University that I think, how does it go? It's that people's. The quality of people's relationships at the age of 50 determine the quality of people's. There's a correlation to their quality of health in their 80s. So again the quality of their relationships in their 50s determine the OR is correlated. I don't want to say determined because that's not accurate in science. Is correlated on these long term wellness studies by Harvard correlated to your health, the quality of your health in your 80s. Is that not bizarre? That's amazing to me. So let's dive into relationships and the assessments that can help you there. First ones, we're going to go family style. All right. The nonprofit entity called turnisol Kids is basically, it's like the five archetypes for children and, and teens. And I have had my kids do this and it's been profound just to see, okay, everybody's archetype is. So I, I could predict it, but I wanted to see what their quiz results were because you get percentages in like I'm not 100% wood, but I'm a higher percentage in wood. And then my second highest would be metal and then I've got a pretty high percentage in the other three. Whereas some people are very high in a couple and very low in a couple or very different or than than mine are. However, when they do this for kids, it helps kids understand more about themselves. It helps kids really get that they have some tendencies and those are like superpowers. Those are like traits that help them be better in the world, be themselves, be fully self expressed. And then there's parts of them that might have a shadow side to that superpower. So it helps them learn about themselves and also relate to other kids, relate to other adults so that they can understand this interaction between how they show up in the world and how somebody else shows up in the world. It also helps them understand, oh, that person has a little more water. They tend to like these things more. This tends to be their superpowers. So it's a really great way to understand each other and have kids understand themselves. And so the, the website turn us all kids.org and then assessment, we'll have that link for you as well that we've had all our kids do. It really helps them understand us. Us understand them, helps us relate differently. Because if I'm treating one kid, I shouldn't say kid four. Four of our kids are full on adults. They're not kids anymore. But we, we've gone through the them being kids and what that's like. And if you're parenting at any age, even if your kids are in their adult years, it's still. There's still these relational aspects. And if you can understand them and treat them as they are instead of treat them how you are or treat them how you want them to be, it goes so much further because they feel so much more seen and understood and valued because you're seeing them as they are. And when they have an archetype that helps them understand themselves and helps them understand you and you understand them is so valuable. So that is turnisol kids. And that is basically like the five archetypes. The wood, they just don't call it metal, they call it gold. So the wood, fire, earth, gold, and water. And I found that so valuable for our family. All right, the next one. Everybody's heard of this one. I'm sure it is the Love languages. Everybody heard of the Love Languages. I love the Love languages. The Love languages were one of the first tests that ever helped me have a label for certain behaviors that were different between Paul and myself. And it helped me understand. Oh, okay. So we could have spent the whole weekend together, but I was looking for quality time. We had to have had a greater connection on that weekend. We. Whereas he might have felt like, oh, we did a bunch of things together, if his was acts of service, then his cup was full and my cup was low. We did a bunch of things together, but we didn't have a deeper connection. So that really helped me distinguish between some of the differences between how Paul and I see love. What our definitions of love, what we, what language we're speaking in love, what I'm speaking love versus what he's speaking in love. So those five love languages There are things in there like acts of service, gifts and quality time. And I'm forgetting the last two. I don't have them in front of me right now, but those ones were the first eye openers for me to understand that. That, wow, you know, we have some differences and it's helpful to know how we show love, how we speak love to the other person. And knowing that I find the thing that wasn't as helpful for me is that then I felt like, okay, I'm supposed to be that for them, but what if that's not me? And that's where the five archetypes helped me. And I think maybe Paul too, in distinguish. Okay, this is how we can serve each other amidst our archetypes versus the love languages tend to speak in terms of, okay, now you know their love language. So now show up for them like that. And if, if that doesn't jive with who I am, that's the only hard part that I have with the love Languages. But I found it very, very helpful to identify, oh, what are my love languages, because then I can give myself that. And I found it very, very helpful to understand his. I was in the right space. I would love to serve him the way he wants to be served this. It's a beautiful thing. And the other part about the love languages, they. If you go onto their site, they have more categories to put the love languages into to understand people not just in the context of romantic relationships, but also in the context of the workplace or context of just different scenarios, even families and children. If your child shows up to you and all they want to do is cling on you and hug on you, then clearly they are. They need the physical touch. Physical touch is their love language. So that one, I think is very helpful. We'll have the link for that as well in the show notes. And the next one, I got two more for you on the relationships. Because relationships are so important. The more you can understand, I believe, the better you're likely to be able to navigate the waters that can be a little treacherous sometimes called relationships. So this next one is the erotic blueprint. Ooh, did you even know there was a test for that? What? Right. The erotic blueprint. And this is by someone who is an expert in the field of. I don't know if they're a sexologist, I guess there's the name for it. But they're, they're, they're the expert in. They're the sexpert in all things intimacy, for relationships, for romantic partnerships. And this one the erotic blueprint. I'm getting a little. A little scratchy throat all of a sudden. Hard to talk about this. Goodness. The erotic blueprints are ones where if you understand how your partner shows up what their blueprint is, there are different blueprints, such as sensual or energetic or sexual or kinky. These different blueprints, or one is called a shape shifter, they basically can go between these different blueprints. But this understanding, I've. There's an entire book on the erotic blueprints, and it's basically about love mapping from an intimate perspective. And the person who is this, this expert is Jaya. And you see her on Netflix on a program, I think it's goop. Anyway, you can look for it there. So this erotic blueprint helps people understand themselves and their partner sexually more. So most of us have grown up understanding a definition of sex based on society, based on our parents, based on their taboos and their restrictions around the topic. And for most people, it's one of the areas of life where the most guilt and the most shame and the most uncertainty comes up if they just don't really understand the other realms of, of the spectrum of sexual intimacy. And, and that's where I think that this is something that Paul and I are exploring. If I'm going to be fully transparent, just exploring, well, oh, we've been taught in society that it's all about a sexual nature. And yet there are so many other ways to have intimacy in that realm that might be more sensual about touch in different ways, or cuddling or hugging or just. I'm not going to go. This is not that kind of podcast. But, but I do want you to understand that there are different, like, archetypes, but they're called blueprints. And when you understand them, it leads to a better understanding of yourself, so greater self awareness, greater perhaps compassion for yourself, and then greater understanding of your partner so that there doesn't seem like there's this mismatch so frequently or why. Why do we seem like we're just on completely different time zones or wavelengths in that particular topic called intimacy in the bedroom. So the erotic blueprints, I think, are helpful for everyone just to. It doesn't matter if you're not in a relationship, just the relationship with yourself when it comes to that intimate area of life. So I would suggest that one. Erotic blueprints, and then the last one that I'm going to look at is called relationship styles, or, sorry, attachment styles, I should say, excuse me. Attachment styles are all about how we learned to attach as children. So if we grew up in a household where there was a lot of yelling, we might have learned an insecure attachment style that might have become insecure anxious or insecure avoidant or insecure traumatic. Most of us would love to have a secure attachment style and a lot of us do. There's a lot of people who grew up in very well love, well rounded and loving parental relationships and, and so there's a lot of well attached people out there. However, the, the research suggests that there is over 50% likely much higher than that because this is self reported information, but well over 50% of people have insecure attachment styles. So they tend to go into insecure avoidant behaviors or insecure anxious behaviors, or sometimes a lot of both with insecure traumatic behaviors. And this particular quiz or solution allows you to understand a little bit more about your attachment style because when you understand that, then you can understand some of your own behaviors. When you, when you feel like you need to leave immediately if there's any sort of conflict, you're likely in an avoidant attachment style. If you feel like you are, you, you have to resolve the thing you keep pursuing and pursuing and pursuing. You might feel you might be in an insecure anxious type of style, but when you understand these, you can start to see where the solutions come in and how you can give yourself what you need in those realms. And that I think if I was to wrap up all of these quizzes is when you know yourself better, when you understand your strengths, when you understand the shadow side of some of your strengths, when you understand the layers of your preferences, that's when you can give that to you. Because what we most often do is we are looking for other people to fulfill that. When we don't even know what we're trying to get fulfilled. We just know there's a void, we know there's something empty, we know there's something we want we're craving, but we're looking for it from another person or from a role or from a situation or experience. And yet when we understand what it is, we can then fulfill that for ourselves. It's not anyone else's job to make us feel whole or full or complete or satisfied or fulfilled. It's ours. So the beautiful thing about any of these assessments, any of these quiz quizzes is that it's going to give you more information about yourself. Just the act of taking the quiz is having you open your mind to, to, oh, what can I discover about myself? And when you discover those things, then you can give yourself that. This is the opposite of being self absorbed. This is the opposite of being selfish. It is the thing that allows you to be selfless and be able to give more to others because your cup is full. So this is as I started the podcast with, this is you being able to be your best in order to give your best. So by all means, if there's one or more one or more of these quizzes that may help you understand more about an area of your life that you want to understand more of, take the quiz, do the stuff. There's no harm in it. In fact, I find them completely invigorating and fun. So go for it. And if you find this valuable and you think that someone else might be interested in these, please share by all means. And if you love our podcast, give us a rating. Give us that five star rating and review because that's what helps this get out to more people. Go ahead, have a great day, have a great rest of your week and get to know yourself a little better with these assessments.

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